Ep 426 - Blessed

wow wow Wes I just have dirty. water just have a glass of disgusting. water some lemon water that's just no no. that's just my some coffee I pour in. there I like to drink dirty water dude. myself I do that I'll take my coffee mug. from the morning and just hit it it's. like get a little something in I wanted. the ice for my water a good move and you. get the coffee taste you get to continue. the Coffee Kick kind of and it was also. I was chewing tobacco and I don't like. to dip and for some reason if the. spitter has anything in it m i don't.

like it anyway that makes sense welcome. to the podcast guys this is basically. this is basically a [ __ ] Victory lap. episode yeah dude what a what a dramatic. weekend what a victory it's crazy dude I. mean again it's just you know sitting. there what was it Thursday night yeah. get the call Thursday night dude no idea. yeah I'm rocking my youngest and all of. a sudden I go it's time I said Matt get. on a plane get on the plane as fast as. you can so I couldn't sleep obviously I. couldn't sleep yeah dude you knew you're.

The Joe Rogan Experience I dude whole. herir was a drum I was like [ __ ] dude. and I I was like excited and I went it. was like 30 seconds of excitement and. then like 4 hours of like you're going. to [ __ ] this up you dumb [ __ ] idiot I. spent the night before it I forgot Ari. was there Ari came to Tim dy I literally. spent the night before I did Rogan the. first time like in a pool like floating. just. like this is. weird like I was like this just feels.

weird dude you know you know what I mean. and I's such a nice guy he's like yeah. yeah it's like dude I feel like I'm. going to [ __ ] like this is just weird. dude that was all I could do I was like. I don't like. it there I I uh yeah I could there's. definitely a feeling that's unlikable of. the whole thing it's just like this is. yeah I'm I I had the same thing when I. got SNL yeah I was like I don't this is. weird it's just too much this is a.

things are going to go bad they did both. cases both cases things went pretty. negative I was just sitting there and I. was like finally laid down I think like. midnight or finally like was like all. right I'm going to go to sleep at. midnight I had to get up at 2:30 and it. was just like literally almost still was. like playing alarm clock games or I was. like yeah five more in my head I'm like. dude are you come on man I do it all the. time it was crazy it was like get up. could be the most important thing in the. world I'm like I definitely get 10 more.

minutes sleep right through it oh I knew. it was going to go bad I knew it was. somebody else's. fault but yeah that was that was my main. my main fear was being so tired that I. just got complete just [ __ ] I the. adrenaline was going dude when you. sprinted down the hallway towards me. true I was like oh oh it's on oh it's on. yeah true getting the nap when I got. there I had enough time to get a 1 hour. nap that was that was the Clincher once. I got that nap I was like I'm good.

that request was so scary dude texting. Ries I I was nervous for you I was I was. like oh [ __ ] please don't think I'm a. little [ __ ] I know INR be like hey. can uh can I bring a friend yeah is it. okay true I mean and then we ran into. him with the creek and he was like yes. obviously like all right sweet I know. that was I was being gay. dude I'm sorry I shouldn't have asked. like that no but it is a thing it is. kind of a nerous ra thing to be like hey.

can my friend you ask somebody for. anything yeah it's tough but true that. God it worked out it did dude that was a. blast that was a lot of fun what a. [ __ ] weekend yeah every show was. great that's where I started feeling. like weirded out you walk every single. show was great yeah that was strange cuz. that that room in helium you walk out. and it's just or Cap City whatever I. didn't see the stage at all so I was. just in the green room and I walked out. and there's just like a 5 foot. semicircle stage and I was like duh yeah.

and then you kill no matter what you say. they're like yeah it's like dude I knew. I was the best this whole time forget. about the last six weekends on the. road this one is true yeah no that was. that was awesome yeah it's rare to have. a weekend where every show every single. person does good yeah yo con man was. killing yeah yo con man everyone dude. yeah thanks for inviting me to your. friend's house dude I had a lot of fun. at your friend house grumpy oan man.

he had a grumpy boy he'd get off he'd. kill he'd get off stage and be like how. are they I was like dude I was like that. was nice he was like they're good yeah. you hear he's maybe he's turning over a. super stoic Leaf yeah he's pretty sto be. Conor aelius dude be Christopher. aelas yeah might have to get maybe we'll. get the Bro up on the page dude some oh. dude me and OK Conor so we went to the. bar oh yeah what the [ __ ] dude no this. this weekend we're sitting at the bar me.

and Conor this girl comes in and sits. behind him oh yeah and he's got his back. to her so he's facing me I can kind of. see her she's like yeah hammered Gremlin. dude she starts she starts punching. Chris and he thinks like oh she's like. yeah we're having fun the bar he's like. knocking off and he like went back to be. like come on yeah above the above the. way cut it out we goofing and she was. like get your [ __ ] hands off me you. piece of [ __ ] and I was like dude we got.

to move we got we got to get the [ __ ]. out of here and then she kept doing it. she started like actually like pushing. him like I could see him like push. moving and I was like hey could you. please like stop hitting my friend yeah. and she goes you're. fat I was just like God damn it. lady dude she go yo she goes you're fat. and then she. goes pulled her tube top down put out. her tits she wearing a tub top yeah she. went Jesus Christ pulled out big fat.

boobs and still wear she not been so. mean to me I wouldn't have been mean. back but she was like you're fat pulled. her tits out I was like your tits are. [ __ ] disgusting dude those are. disgusting you gross idiot and she was. like yeah I am ugly and I was. immediately I was like no you're not I'm. sorry like she was like so sad but then. she was like yeah I'm ugly I was like no. you're not and she was like but you're. fat so who cares and I was like well you. are ugly [ __ ] [ __ ].

you I mean talk about a girl misfunction. just pushing boys pulling your tits out. it's like it was I'm ugly I'm ugly also. also getting it like she couldn't even. see me hitting me with the year I was. like damn she's hit me with like your. fat from like me sitting she can just. see like te up she was just like you're. [ __ ] fat I was like Jesus Christ God. damn you see the whole of me and then we. keep going we go back to talking she's. just at the bar she takes her [ __ ]. beer just turns it upside down puts it.

back sits there a bartender comes over. one of the [ __ ] dudes came over and. kissed her he like came over to be like. hey how are you doing she was like and. he kissed he kissed on the lips it was a. peck on the lips whoa I was like okay. all right to be fair that bartner was. probably on coke definitely to be fair. that guy was probably Coke she pours the. beer out he's she's just sitting there. now a guy comes over and is like did you. spill this and she's like. no like I was like she you got to get.

her the [ __ ] out of here yeah dude so. then they finally got her out she goes. to the bathroom while she's walking back. that bartender that I saw kiss her is. like I saw all you guys looking at her. when she was walking around I was like. dude you [ __ ] kissed her he was like. what the no I didn't he like spazzed so. yeah you did a great night that's pretty. fun that was it that was the end of it. that was it I let him off the hook a. little I was like I know I know she. kissed first I saw I was being generous. dude he kissed a clearly blacked out. woman oh that's ass salt brother yeah. she was live at the party though as soon. as she left like what was the point.

I mean that should be a police escort. for a girl that drunk to get home like. she was still outside when we left when. we were leaving she was outside it was. like jeez dude what somebody should help. not me though someone's going to help. her I'm a Good Samaritan not a fat. Samaritan you call me fat I'm. out D getting hit with J oh you're fat. that's crazy come on lady it's [ __ ] up. like you're punching my friend yeah I. like can you please stop I mean the. obvious question is what if that what.

happens if that's a. dude throw I mean if that's a dude well. if he called me fat I would just be like. you're gay yeah true I wouldn't I. wouldn't fight a guy like that I'm. saying that guy would have been removed. from the bar in 4 seconds oh oh you're. saying if a guy sat down and started. doing that to women all. that in the face bothering people. everyone would have whooped his ass. tries to kiss the BART bartender. probably still would have kissed C he's. high on coke and he's a [ __ ] drug. addict bartender you guys. want he's high on coke C and has too. much hair gels a drug addict.

bartender [ __ ]. loser it is fun to pick a profession and. just attack it his it's very fun it's. very very fun uh it's like n it's like. okay what so you're not a drug addict. bartender you're a man blun [ __ ] so. which one are. you man bu [ __ ] with a cool beard or a. random animal drug addict bartender dude. there's nothing in between are you a. radical feminist [ __ ] communist. bartender who's also kind of an. alcoholic who's definitely absolutely.

raging. [Laughter]. alcoholic yeah man it's funny there's no. other possible way in that in that. industry uh there is you you can age out. to be like women there's women at the. Elks in mechanics but it's just ladies. old ladies yeah that's a good place to. be you're saying just like somebody's. ant oh old ant we like a crew neck. [ __ ] hoodie the rules are totally. yeah rules are totally different to. women Steelers sweatshirt from there's. you're just a tough [ __ ] at that point. yeah that's just tough [ __ ] there's.

tough [ __ ] then there's just two. types of dudes that's it bartending. that's absolutely right unless you want. to get on some Coyote Ugly stuff but. that does that's you're just having fun. at that point that's girls pretending to. be bartenders yeah like a tall blonde. [ __ ] whipping it's like go come on I. like that this is your summer off from. graphic design school go back get out. from behind the bar yeah knock it off. grow up you're stealing a job from a. tough [ __ ]. dude tough fitches but they're also very. nice like hey sweetie how like honey. what what do you want they're very nice.

yeah true the tough pitches are very. nice they're the best like you want some. scratch offs we got a popcorn machine. they're among the best that's what. happens when you've like when you get. this when you've cut hair so much that. your hands act up hit the bar Bart. tenant dude it's tough Bish it's tough. [ __ ] industry dude haircutting. bartending male male ladies are kind of. like the elite tough [ __ ] yeah yeah. Ma ladies are more I would say on the. upper cast of tough [ __ ] thick too. I've never seen one that's not thick. don't get me started why are they so.

thick dude bro don't get me in trouble. you like the mail ladies you're like the. dogs you and the dogs I've been. following chase him out dude I've been. following the influx of H just. dude. philadelph the door cracked open a. little. like Philadelphia I've been tracking. this for the last about seven eight. years Philadelphia has have an influx of. hot black male ladies yes and I've. always I've been tapping I have i' I'm.

with you I've seen it it's crazy f it. only in Philly though I've only seen it. in Philly I don't know thick black mail. ladies yeah man just holding it down. just. [ __ ] I hear that should be a genre. thick black mail ladies it'll be coming. coming into your. house don't worry someone needs a sign. for this don't worry about the dog naked. worry about. [Laughter]. me biting her ankles like a oh that's.

good stuff get on all fours as soon as. they come in the. door I would get out of the house they. have to get me back in my house yeah. come on get in there get in there I'm. playing with you and I. be time for this foolishness [ __ ] and. all of a sudden they set me down and we. do like The Lion King thing where I fall. and she's the [ __ ] but I was thinking. about that [ __ ] Simba is such a sub. dude he only gets hard when Nala's on. top of him oh both times in one and two. she's always on top of him dude and he's.

always like oh [ __ ] he can only come. when he's being dominated by a. lioness but I that's just something I. noticed that's just something I noticed. but that's just something I've noticed. lately I like that though do a king. that's also a sub he's a total sub dude. Mufasa obviously was [ __ ] Alpha as. [ __ ] he's a pretty freaky sub yeah. that's usually how it works a little son. a little [ __ ] son yeah but yeah so I. know noticed that I said damn this is a.

pretty freaky guy every time she gets on. top scar is gay scar is gay that went. back to that there was a nice there was. a Trope for a while the bad guys were. gay in dizzy movies in everything like. the bad guy was always slightly. effeminate you know dude it's totally. true yeah his scar is. like oh oh you will see me brother. although doesn't he Ray point of the. liines the female lines isn't he like. maybe it was a a deleted scene you think. deleted scene I think there was a.

deleted scene where he was like you owe. me an air what yeah go to Google it yeah. find that dude that's [ __ ] nuts cuz I. know he does I saw it on Instagram well. Lion King to that might have just been. the [ __ ] fanfiction it was pretty. sick but thought it was hot for sure. right wait. what there was a part of that where he. was like oh wait this might be a oh no. it seems like a sketch of a.

the deleted scene from The Lion King. shows scar trying to get Nala to be his. Queen it's sort of dark but I think it. should have been left in the movie. that's what this Reddit post oh he was. that makes more sense why I want to get. SIM tell it looks just like a storyboard. though I've seen the actual animation. part of it well so he was grooming Nala. and he needed to get rid of Simba. because he wanted to take over then Nala. would be his he probably which is very. lion it's very lionlike yeah I think. that's what they do I think they like. kill Cubs may there's not true might.

might not or might not have been room. for two subs in the Kingdom he might. have like I'm the sub get out of. here I'm also I'm a pedophile as well. I'm also a. pedophile I'm a gay pedophile I'm a gay. pedophile lion I hate this who's also. British I'm British I've had enough of. your father's heteronormative [ __ ]. my brother my brother black guy who. played Darth Vader me gay British.

guy he be Kevin spy scar was voiced by. Kevin spacy I wish might have been no. who's the. guy Ricky who's Ricky J it was Ricky. J who who voiced scar Jeremy Irons yeah. Jeremy Irons dude he was in Kingdom of. Heaven what yeah he's [ __ ] man who. you play in Koh uh he was one of. okay.

nice damn right wasn't he a kingdom of. heaven another Peta movie go ahead ah he. he was like the Knight that was like he. was with he was against the god wills it. guys oh okay okay oh yeah he was he's a. man dude God Wills a guy's ruled too. though also again little kind of gay g. day you know dude G in Kingdom of Heaven. yeah he a gay boy yeah true true beast. but a little femin anytime when anyone's.

under that like that era of like. European royalty if as soon as you get. mad you look gay cuz you're like. ridiculous you like no one could throw. anything I've had enough of him. embarrassing me he's taking gloves off. he like throws a chalice or something. he's like in in France we wouldn't have. such people at our tables he gets home. he's. like he goes in Massacre as a. caravan that is funny just you're just. to have your like all your man.

mannerisms atrophy and being so gay damn. Jeremy I'm trying to get that rich I'm. just like. no Jeremy so. bored he's been in some good movies dude. really dude I can't think of what was. one bad guy I feel like the only bad. guys who aren't gay are Russians they. might have stopped him yeah those dudes. are not gay at all Russian bad guys not. gay they tried to do it in uh The. Departed there were people out there. there's theories that uh what's his. name's gu buy buer no uh Matt Damon in.

the movie yeah there's people that want. him to be. gay like bad guys are. gay he does gay stuff in the movie A. little does he really I mean not to me. he like couldn't get hard. once big whoop that's nothing he calls. everyone else gay big. whoop. [ __ ] oh. [ __ ] yeah about gay dreams yesterday.

turns out there's nothing wrong with. them nothing there's literally nothing. gay about it it's about it's about. integrating psychological aspects of. male and female thank you for doing that. research I was never going to look into. that I was going to leave those gay. dreams a little secret that I. have I was going to take those to the. Grave have that gay dreams fine it's. nothing wrong to prepare it's to prepare. your mind to fight actual gayness in. real life exactly you're just you're. really summoning all your Bros dude I. had a dream I did did gay stuff on a.

podcast not long ago and then had sit. what happened what happened to this dud. I was talking about this dude it's I was. just I don't I was I was riding. motorcycles and we came off and I again. I don't exactly remember who it was well. that was like sick that's all I got. tricked into it dude [ __ ] riding. motorcycles it was like a uh you know. like the old Tony Hawk shows where it. was like flames and half pipes it was. like [ __ ] like that and I like put my. bike down and it was just like a gay. mashup of every podcaster I know. specifically a lot of the dudes in. Philadelphia just all doing gay stuff.

the only thing I barely remember is like. maybe I made out with Ryan shander I. don't know but I kind of remember like I. don't know what I did I don't know the. gayest one I know dude I know I know he. looks like a gay. guy dude he looks like a leather. daddy so then it was like I don't again. it was very hazy as to what happened but. it was just nothing but podcasters being. very gay on camera and then I sat there. and just kept watching the views of it. being like 48 okay it's not too bad and.

being like oh [ __ ] and then I woke up. dude I woke up like I it was you know. you have a dream where you get to. reassure your that was just a dream I. had a good two minutes of being like did. we do that that was a dream no it's not. a dream I'm like no and I had to get and. I fin then I finally woke up I was like. that's just a dream that's not real I'm. just incorporating masculine elements. into my psyche dude [ __ ] that yeah it. was very funny so yeah that was a that. was a tough one no I mean that was a. that was that is the worst feeling you.

in a dream you kill someone or something. very serious and you wake up like yeah. [ __ ] yeah did I do that even more worse. than killing a man making out with Ryan. Shaner on a motorcycle on the internet. on camera we could have been ramping. dirt bikes why the [ __ ] you know what I. mean we could I could have had the best. dream ever you know what would be nice. would be guard dog and Shaner two. mustaches kind of Jack get two ABS. bumping into each other big penis I mean. we're talking in the dream realm we're. talking about you guys just this is more. of like meeting of but in the dream.

realm only has to deal through symbols. so obviously one of you guys are going. to have to suck the other one but it's. going to be is an Inception for your. psychic development yeah all right what. e you. do bean like Inception you guys could be. [ __ ] like in a on the. ceilings be bouncing. around Gardini almost got destroyed on. the highway almost saw him die I was. right behind him what happened I'm still. shaking a Jeep dude it was a Jeep thing. apparently a Jeep thing swerving into. someone else's Lane and almost killing.

them Jeep thing yeah dude they they. almost off-roaded me yeah dude gardinia. he I didn't even know it was him I was. just behind him Jeep T reminded me of. our [ __ ] Jamaican talk in The Green. Room big the big artistic gay. man autistic Jewish gay. man them freaky girl we were doing that. for like 10. minutes God that was it was such a nice. weekend that was it really made me happy. all so far I'm still happy yeah that was. a blast that was an absolute blast the.

whole thing was fun the stand up was. very fun I've been thinking about it I. should be happy for I should keep being. happy yeah that's a good move it's easy. to be happy yeah I was listening to lead. Zeppelin which like I'm happy what song. oh well it's not albums cuz I'm it's on. Spotify sick so I just floating through. I mean rock and roll. is so good I was just thinking of. getting the let out the so good dude I. was I've been saving it cuz I've been. going back through old stuff and a lot. of it I've been like. it's not t it's not hit in the same.

spots it's not hit in the same spot. obviously like I dude I went back did. 311 music I was like this used I used to. skateboard down my basement to that. still was pretty nasty 311 holds up dude. 311 music the album before blue was. nasty I did I went through the old uh. Sublime albums and I was like 40 o of. Freedom does still [ __ ] rock but. again I'm like but dude I've been I was. thinking about getting the lead out and. I was like dude what if [ __ ] no it's. it's still what if the whole lot of love. guitar solo doesn't send me easy like it.

used. to damn. dude yeah I might have to get the let. out on the way home it's nice I've been. I've been deep into just like weird. techno and stuff lately that's fun too. iide I was I hold on I'll find it I I. got a good one for you that actually. ended up not being that good but it was. and then I was afraid sometimes your. Spotify is public yeah like it show like. people people can see what you're listen. to it they're like I don't know it used.

to be like that I'm not sure if it still. is but I was afraid I found uh an album. called fired up. 2003 what is. it what are you talking about that's. awesome so. [Music]. good don't call me. baby oh dude this is crazy yeah I've. been doing crying on the dance floor. that's my playlist I. doing crying on the Dance Floor fired up.

2003 was an album you could buy that's. crazy and I start I was listening to it. on the plane for far too long I listened. to it on the plane for like an. hour for a while was like damn this. shit's actually really good yeah it was. awesome and then I got in my head I was. like if one person found out I was. listening to fired up 2003 it's over if. they I was just sitting there listening. to fired up 2003 just bobing my head on. a plane. yeah that's on [ __ ] rules yeah the.

weekend was very nice dude nice time. stand up stand up was better or stand up. was perfect yeah roogie's perfect. couldn't have gone better yeah and then. I I did Danny Brown's podcast the next. day great yeah like what else yeah Lam. mer was there Lam mer is what a light in. all the darkness lamely is an actual. light it's the best somebody who never. gets down it's always me and OK Conor me. and walking I was like look dude we.

either got to stop drinking or stop. being ashamed of it yeah cuz we can't. keep doing this yep we literally get. hammered all the time and we're like. it's that's too much IR sadness and. guilt can't have it it's an over you. kind of have it like unbelievable and. then you go to a show and you're like. I'm I'm the top of the world now I'm the. absolute King have a couple drinks jeez. you need a ly dude Lam mer I've never. heard him I don't think he complains. never no it's literally Sam dude he's. holding down a spot line for me at Shake. Shack he text me he's like oh he's like.

you want to meet me at Shake Shack I'm. like yeah he's like oh actually I'm. already here and I'm like all right I'll. be there there is the that side you do. have to deal with the ultimate just. constant dumb. [ __ ] but it's endearing dude but then. he's like but I'm holding you the line. was out all the lines there were crazy. that's an oconor move but I'm already. Conor would be like I'm actually already. here and then I'd be like what the [ __ ]. if L mer did it I'd be like nice he's an. idiot. no offense L man I didn't mean to say.

your name I held down the line the spot. in line then I decided I actually was. going to get a rotisserie chicken. instead of a Shake Shack that's nice. yeah I was like do I want a belly that's. all I had to ask myself I started going. do I really want a belly ache this. afternoon I went nah I'll skip the belly. a and I'll eat it actually still got. like a weird I mean I ate a lot of. rotisserie chicken I opted for a whole. rotisserie chicken in a tub of guacamole. and just was [ __ ] pulling guacamole. out with chicken it was pretty of course. that was my lunch it's a good lunch I. got those tacos again really from that.

place velvet Tacos yeah that [ __ ]. Ticky whatever Masala how you say Ticky. Masala is that how you say chicken. masala it it just reminded me of my mom. what was that cheeky cheeky Masala true. this is how it happens I know you do. become Phil Phil just guesses words you. see two ks in a row in a word. Passa whatever that Indian [ __ ] cheeky. cheeky Mas chicky time Ricky chicky.

tabes Ricky chicky Takis dude that so. good I called I called uh magenta magnet. the other day so I was like that [ __ ]. magnet [ __ ] I was like. [ __ ] yeah Brit's been killing me on. these [ __ ] colors bro she hit me with. uh we have this elder B Elderberry. orange juice dude and I was like it's. purple juice and Ma and Britney were. like that's red juice and I was like the. [ __ ] out of here bro yeah the [ __ ] out.

of you should have literally kicked them. out of the house I should honestly. packed their bags and be like the whole. family is gone [ __ ] out everyone's gone. all of you and they like you kidding. around then I put like the youngest. seven-month-old outside in the cold be. like does that look like I'm [ __ ]. around this is not a joke does that look. like I'm [ __ ] around get out everyone. get out now I'm so angry at you guys now. the house has been the house has been an. era of it's air of Peace it is Absolut p. r you know PX ran you said it before you. said it's the PX. this is it this is yeah it's nice p is.

nice soon it'll be war time it has to be. it's how it goes what do you think the. war is going to be I think it'll be you. and I beheading guard dog I think Guard. Dog Guard dog's flying too close to the. Sun as it is Big Shot you've been a real. big shot I hear about you at the stand I. hear about the things you say at the. stand when I'm not around like what like. he's just like I'm I'm the best in the. city really he's like I'm the top he. calls himself the top Young Gun Young. Gun. yeah he says I am the top L on my name.

what you always lying on me what what. you think he's a liar you call me a. [ __ ] liar in. my this the war dude this is how the war. begin start of the. warude such [ __ ] dude I told you. what I want to do now I have another. camera I want to put one camera on a br. camera the whole time and I'm going to. hire a boss for Gardini yeah I'm going. to hire some promote Noah right away. thinking about it but no he's been a. [ __ ] quiet good worker this he's been.

great he's never asked for a race no. he's been. fantastic he's never asked for anything. he's in school he does need to study. first I got to get him a drop out once. he gets a degree then we can start he. only has a semester yeah he are you sure. it's his one semester I think he has a. little bit he's on that long plan but. yeah Noah's got Big Dreams I think Noah. wants to go work in like a like a forest. or something yeah he wants to work in a. farm yeah right doesn't he want to be a.

farmer with like horses he does love. horses eventually but I think he wants. to be like a park ranger type yeah he. wants to work for like go disappear into. the. woods everybody says that he might be. the only dude I know who truly wants to. disappears like he could disappear into. the War I mean obviously he's you know. he's got [ __ ] he does have big. Sasquatch energy mhm does got that in. him he's you know he's a bit of a. Squatch I mean let's put it this way. there's been part of him that was here. at first he's part native true so he's. probably trying to get back to the woods.

he was in the YouTube comments. first so he might just be trying to get. back to the woods it's like the old tale. of the uh the holy man who turned a. mouse into a lady try to get the mouse. to marry the lady Mouse to marry the son. she's like that's not good enough for me. yeah goes to the mountains oh they're. too big I don't want the mountains goes. to the clouds that's kind of I don't. want they're so gloomy eventually she's. like what do you want she goes I just. want to marry a mouse bro he turns her. back from a lady into a mouse it says. how could I deny her true.

nature what a good story exactly right I. read that this I read that this morning. I said what a good. story we have a bunch of mice in this. apartment do you really yeah you might. have turned them into beautiful ladies. dude unfortunately I had to hire a. exterminator what they do they just. blocked up all the holes in the vents. and then put poison everywhere oh nice. so now poor guys are getting poisoned. I'm all right with them yeah it's my. woman that hates them are they pooping. everywhere yeah they're going to get us. pretty Ill get it Kitty. those things can take care of themselves.

dude yeah I do like cats a lot yeah what. the hell is stopping. you get a [ __ ] cat you could they. could just kill all the. mice yeah you don't think I'd love that. I but I want to I want to wait until I. get some outdoors I like let the boys. outside I got you cramping up a cat then. you're going to end up with a gay City. Cat a bad guy scar you're going to end. up with a scar I want to save up so I. can get a Main [ __ ] yeah and let him. water get him outside fighting some dogs. and stuff yes I'd like him to fight dogs.

that' be awesome TI goes to war yeah he. there's coyotes in our backyard he he's. holding his ground he is getting old. though he's going to get ripped apart by. Coyotes I mean in maybe this summer. Warrior's death man I know I actually. want it for him let him have it he's. last time I saw him he was in tough. shape yeah tibs ass. problems he's had ass problems his whole. life since he was a kid really every. time he shits there's one turd and he. runs and then he runs and it falls out.

it's pretty sick actually yeah I Jackson. needs paper towels and every now and. again I got to like pinch like get a. paper towel it's a turd with a paper. towel like thing stuck to it I have to. grab the paper towel like a white wet. wipe yeah got to pull it out of his ass. and he's [ __ ] I'm like dude stop is. it ever is there ever more than you. think like a magician no it's I mean. I've been mildly surprised nothing crazy. I wish but sometimes too you get the old. blade of grass blade of grass there like. a single blade of grass coming out of. his [ __ ] and I have to to grab it and. go you [ __ ] idiot God he steps in his.

own [ __ ] I there's nothing that makes me. more Angry than him stepping in his own. [ __ ] and I'm was like dude yeah what the. [ __ ] man what's wrong is an idiot oh my. God a good idiot though he is he is a. sweetheart but dude he did it to me the. other day seems smart she is yeah toally. smart but Jackson obviously runs the. house does he yeah we have two beds and. he'll just get out of his bed and [ __ ]. her and be give me your bed and lay down. Briny gets so mad I'm like why are you. mad at either are dogs yeah he's not. being an [ __ ] he doesn't know he's. just going like yeah I want to lay there.

yeah he [ __ ] her. constantly guys Lucy breaker's pouches. has the strongest and longest lasting. flavor not like those other gas station. Brands Lucy break Lucy breaker's tiny. capsules break open and unleash a burst. of flavors in your mouth like mint mango. Berry and. gum no they are I like the burst dude. you like those the crystals there's a. little little cap in. flavor when I get my mango every once a. while I go like this and I pop it and I.

go that was. satisfying save yourself a trip to the. gas station and subscribe online so. you've so you've always got a box ready. to go they'll send it to your house you. [ __ ] idiot you don't have to keep. getting up you know most car accidents. happen within a mile of your house this. guy's going to get gas station [ __ ]. I've heard that shitfaced like I need. some sh we saw some Ruffians by the Yeah. those guys would have robbed you we saw. guys drop heroin outside two heroin guys. into a [ __ ] convenience store those. guys would [ __ ] yeah you want to be.

like them no those would kill that's. probably how they got started get $10. off your first order of lucy. when you. use promo code drenched at checkout. shipping is always free that's lucy. promo code drenched to receive $10 off. and always free shipping and here's the. fine print Lucid products are only for. adults of legal age and every other is. aged verified this product does contain. nicotine nicotine is an addictive. chemical oh. [Laughter].

the NFL playoff action continues oh we. are one step closer to Super Bowl 57 and. for the NFL divisional round check out. DraftKings sports book an official. sports betting partner of the NFL new. customers can bet just $5 and get 200 in. free bets instantly that's crazy you. can't any picks dude yeah Gabe Davis. anytime scorer there we go let's go. there we go I pick the Philadelphia. Eagles I would Pi Philadelphia Eagles. those points scare me dude s and a half.

against the gmen it's a lot of points. cover against the gmen yeah we got to. win by seven or eight yeah I said I do. the club plus all new and existing. customers can take a shot at even bigger. payout with Draft Kings stepped up same. game play parlays boost your NFL. winnings with each leg you add up to. 100% download the DraftKings Sportsbook. app now and use promo code drenched. drench new customers can bet $5 on the. NFL divisional round and get $200 in. free bets instantly only at draftking.

Sportsbook with promo code drenched. minimum ageability restrictions apply. see show notes for details that's pretty. good dude that was really good you felt. good about that I did it's hard to do. that it. is oh athletic greens guys our next. partner is athletic greens. ag1 by athletic greens was the morning. booster I needed just scoop shake and. have alongside your morning coffee or o. j that's.

taking that's it's like taking your. shelf of multivitamins in one drink I. liked it I take it I liked it I was I. was scooping it up it's a nice little uh. it's good Scoop yeah it's it'll keep you. keto it's it's just like a multivitamin. thing you can drink it makes me drink. water it's pretty cool it's the. healthiest thing I'd say you can do. under one minute it's from the. copy I I like I'm sensitive to stuff. like that I took it I felt good really. yeah I found out dude found out it was. packed with over 75 vitamins and. minerals and then I got such a major.

boost to my gut my mood my energy even. my skin hair and nails what have you. noticed I have I want to say I was like. have you been taking H1 bro you noticed. my beautiful nails I do have quite. feminine fingernails you do have long. nail bit Yeah I do have [ __ ] girl. fing fingers quite jealous I have girl. fingernails on a fat small hand likein. says I have booty diggers she calls my. nails booty diggers just short little. nail beds yeah I say come on man I'm. here husband dude you're [ __ ] killing. me yeah she saying you got gay guy hands.

pretty much butt hands butt hands dude. sorry athletic greens look if you're. looking for an easier way to take. supplements athletic greens is giving. you free one-year supply of vitamin D. and five free travel packs with your. first purchase go to athletic greens.com. drenched that's athletic greens.com. drenched check it out I do like I've. been taking in the morning I like I. don't even think I got it I like it. tastes pretty good I take it my. girlfriend may have hoarded it but I. have noticed a.

puss at the ag1 she got healthy [ __ ]. thanks to athletic. greens thank you athletic greens for. making my girlfriend's [ __ ]. healthy her [ __ ] was sickly before the. athletic greens came. around all right goodbye yeah man it's a. bit of I yeah I could use a nice G. little gatito gatio just you know what. one um just take one in for a little. bit Foster that's the word I was. thinking excuse me Foster a cat yeah but. then you get attached I'm never going to.

let let that cat go dude never going to. let you. go that would. be that would be I couldn't give it up. everyone says like Foster animals it's. like dude they're mine as soon as they. come in my house my sister was fostering. puppies for a while I was like how are. we getting rid of these guys I'd go over. to her house there'd be like six puppies. running around what it was wonderful. yeah I mean dude when you there's people. who do it with fostering kids and then. like like fostering babies and then it's. like someone is comes out of nowhere and. they're like yo let's go yeah so I think.

they have to like that happened with my. sister yeah man it's like I had to say. goodbye to those kids was [ __ ] brutal. gut-wrenching dude my whole family we. had like a one last dinner with the kids. and then put them in a car and I had to. be like goodbye and they like bye Uncle. Shane I was just. like [ __ ] SOB yeah that would get you. man yeah yeah I knew someone who was uh. fostering like a an infant and then like. grew like super attached to it for over. like seven months and then it was they. just came one day and like it has to go.

now now and they were. like I think or maybe the kid was. happens that fast too yeah I think the. kid was aware enough to be like Mommy. and reaching back and then they uh they. were like nah the state I remember it. was in a car seat and I had to like he. was so young I was like shaking his hand. he was. like it's dude it's devastating yeah. it's devastating stuff but they're back. I know now it's a fish true locked in. now they're locked in yeah people I. never thought about that aspect of. Foster and where it's like [ __ ] man.

that's why most foster parents are nasty. [ __ ] that just keep kind of in a. basement that's what I'm saying like. they're just trying not to [ __ ] break. they're trying not to get their hearts. broken like like get them in and beat. them and ignore them they're just trying. not to break their damn I'm not going to. have my heart broken again I'm not going. to share my spaghetti with this kid I. don't want to [ __ ] fall in love with. them could go there and beat them yeah. that's the most like heinous [ __ ] in the. world yeah of like taking and foster. kids and beating them yeah being like. religious zealots that take foster kids.

in beat them and sometimes the dad comes. home and yeah get little. hernie and now we've got a problem yeah. now we've got a real problem yeah yeah. that is a [ __ ] up thing about having. kids you just go like oh yeah dude you. just people just molest them that's it's. just like I think about that constantly. I wildest [ __ ] honor I do it all dude. I'm sitting there all the time and I'm. like okay I'm sitting here with my kid. I'm like dude's just like turn around. and molest their [ __ ] kids and I'm. like Jesus [ __ ] Christ yeah that's so.

crazy and then it's like cuz then you. have to like wake up every day with them. after that and be. like don't tell that's such a [ __ ] up. imagine the na being what uh who's that. lady uh Casey Anthony she was accusing. her dad of it of molesting her yeah she. she the documentary came out and said. she was like that's why I'm [ __ ] wild. and didn't didn't report my 3-year-old. being missing for for 30. days what the [ __ ].

yeah yeah she blamed the killing on her. dad which if both of those are. false yeah Casey Anthony's literally the. worst daughter of all time dude killed. her three-year-old and then was like. yeah my dad's a raping. murder he raped his he raped his kids. and murdered a three-year-old I mean. Jesus got to be sitting there like what. the [ __ ] Casey God damn it I hired a. [ __ ] lawyer for you. I lost everything on this [ __ ].

thing yeah if that's in case he should. kill her if she's lying he should shoot. her in the head yeah man well whatever. yeah I know what you mean there's no way. Casey and's dad's listening to Mt chain. secret podcast be sick he could he could. have been reduced to that position where. he needs to now he's probably like a. lawyer now son he's just like wik wow. W's probably wik w wow and he's probably. like finally my one Escape. this episode Casey Anthony's.

dead these guys bring up a good point. they've definitely successfully. mobilized me in violence and now I must. kill my. daughter it's like the mugatu music for. him dude he's [ __ ] Zoolander doing H. I was listening to mugatu on the plane. were you I was listening to basically. the Zoolander. soundtrack. non-ironically yeah man I mean dud. [ __ ] Zombie Nation came on and I was. like yo what's Zombie. Nation Oh yeah dude that's crazy yeah. yeah it is on the plan just like.

actually like yes that's that I think. was my you said it a long time ago you. had to stop listening to rap yeah get. letting the [ __ ] lead. out listen to Zombie Nation yeah I'm. back dude you might fully be fully you. might fully be back I'm telling you rap. after a while I think it's just designed. to like just beat you down yeah I'm the. best unless you can somehow be doing. well enough to identify victoriously. with the rapper then you start doing. that and you end up like a complete. psycho that's what I'm saying yeah I.

guess I am the best and then you go do a. show and you bomb and you're. like ju World dude I was lying about. everything my all my entire identity is. false oh someone's going to [ __ ] my. girlfriend that guy I thought I was. going to [ __ ] my girlfriend [ __ ] my. girlfriend every song He's going to [ __ ]. my girlfriend and kill me when I'm on. his block [ __ ] [ __ ] I'm definitely going. to get sh yeah I just not being able to. do it man I would just listen to it and. I I still there is some rap I like but. it's like yeah so some I turn it on and. go who the [ __ ] am I kidding man yeah. who the [ __ ] you [ __ ] listen to some.

zap that's what I'm saying been so long. since I danc in the. Moonlight it has been a. while but yeah it is nice it is nice. allowing yourself to be happy in life. when things are going well otherwise. that makes everything very confusing and. scary when things are going well and you. go [ __ ] I'm going to [ __ ] this up yeah. and you start going how long have I just. been torturing myself like this in my. head well two. years it's been about two straight.

years of things are going to go bad soon. yeah that's nice yeah I got to work on. that yeah it's tough it's tough dude. whatever I do it all the time and I just. go especially when I lay down that's. when it really gets me when I lay down. to go to bed at night it's like I'll. listen to one more Audi book I don't. know if I exactly sit with myself in. silence just yet there's no time for. thoughts I have no thoughts dude it's. either I'm doing something playing video. games audio book doing standup no.

thoughts I thought dude I was literally. I was thinking about that the other. night how like I'll just be blaring. myself with just [ __ ] like facts. about like the emergence of Television. until I'm just like I start losing. Consciousness and I'm like sweet and I. just turn it off I'm like it's so nice. when you lose Consciousness listen to an. audio book and and then you realize like. oh I didn't hear the last 30 seconds and. you wake up and it's still going and. you're like Release Me release me this. my favorite yeah dude is my favorite. feeling is laying there and when you. realize you didn't hear it y yes and.

then I go back back back back I hit the. 30 seconds back three times and I turn. it off and. go and then I die in my sleep over and. over again with sleep apnea yeah. true you get are you getting the pat. machine no I got to though that'd be. [ __ ] nice yeah I gotta go I got to go. back to the guy uh I'm getting the. deviated steps looked at turn I don't. know how much how much I did in terms of. uh opening it up myself I thought you. did pretty good I tried to Jo topend in. my you using wind to uh I mean I'm.

getting air through if I go like this. hold on that's the other nostal no it's. boogers but you know what it also could. be not not wind uh eroding your. cartilage but uh the muscles I thought. about that too man if you can push your. teeth together with braces I was. thinking more so the air molecules like. that water Canyon it's over time dude. that yeah that takes a million years. yeah I know I don't have that much time. that's water that's not air true. well air water's passing through air of.

of. course of course of course it is. but I just watched like one millionth of. your kidneys just [ __ ] die yeah of. course you're. right I think about that all the time. now when I get like super [ __ ] up. about something like I'm like which one. of my organs is just like atrophy yeah. which one of these is taking this stress. is just. this stress of someone be like actually.

hope this is going to my spleen yeah for. how much of my wife going just let me. talk just let me just hear what I'm. saying I'm sitting there going like. that's fine but I I can feel the [ __ ]. my killer tea cells falling the cancer. cells like my gallbladder is cramping I. don't even know where it. is something's in there the cancer cells. are like yes rise yes the conditions are. perfect he's so stressed sitting there. listening about the top rack of the. dishwasher just.

like no no I hear you I hear you yeah. yeah you make a great Point. honey I mean you could just put them. wherever you want but [ __ ] yeah it. doesn't matter which way the silverware. is facing in the dishwasher it's not. something we need to fight about please. please I don't. care yeah arguing with somebody about. something you just don't care you don't. care I know it kills you and you can't. say I don't care care cuz then they'll. be like of course you [ __ ] you never. care about anything like I actually.

don't care about anything recently I had. a I had a huge breakthrough it was. actually was regarding the [ __ ]. dishwasher I was being told about and. when even when like she was making an. effort to be like nice about it which. almost bothers me even more because I'm. like so I don't have the I have no. outlet for being like why are you. freaking out about the dishwasher she's. like hey I just want to tell you like. this is the way I put it in there and. I'm going like Jesus [ __ ] I'm dying. I'm [ __ ] dying inside and then stop. halfway through and I'm like this is. just making me really mad right now she.

was like what and I was like dude I'm. not mad at you if you want to talk about. the dishwasher you go ahead and do that. I can't talk about the dishwasher I'm. not going to change you as a person but. when you do this it makes me so [ __ ]. angry yeah and I was like but you have. every right to tell me about the. dishwasher and I'll try to listen I'm. not going to but it pisses me off when. you talk about this you're doing the. right thing and I need a second dude and. she was like oh yeah no problem usually. I'm just kind of like I start trying to. like delete her personality in real time. I'm like don't ever [ __ ] talk about. that [ __ ] to me ever [ __ ] again I'm.

in her I'm in her coding be like can we. just delete that whole block dude and. she's like d every morning I wake up and. I'm on my girlfriend's ass dude. especially if I have when I have to do. something today today I had to work out. this morning I woke up just like you. going to lay in. bed come on lazy. bones I was like I need you to take the. Kurt chilling baseball to the the the. store where we got this framed and get. it in one of those clear boxes and the.

laundry I need the curing I need the. Curt I was like honey wake up I need the. Curt chilling baseball in a clear. [Laughter]. case I've asked you about this before. I've said a couple times what are you. doing and she she Nails it right away. she's like you have to go lift you're. like yes I have to do [ __ ] deadlifts. I have to go deadlift [ __ ] shitty. that is get the Kurt chilling baseball. get the C wake up the Kurt chilling.

baseball needs in a case I'm gonna get. the Kurt chilling baseball we need it. yeah dude where is that thing I'll get. it but yeah dude that's been the uh. that's been a real what the [ __ ] you. thought she could just. toss that's in the box that's something. I realize all arguments between couples. are it's just you're trying to delete. the like code of a person's personality. and infuriates both parties damn dude.

where's your. gloves baseball put some gloves on Shane. all the best Kurt Gabe Davis touchdown. this weekend not a big deal you want to. make some money Gabe Davis touchdown. every game this playoffs. really knuckle ball KN scratched. it is that mint that's mint that's a. mint ball dude dude we got to get back. into baseball cards i' love that dude. that would be so sick dude I told you I. had the Ken Griffey Jr rookie card.

rookie card and I just being the [ __ ]. impetuous [ __ ] that I am I kept taking. it out of the plastic of smudged it all. up doged it I [ __ ] I [ __ ] up all of. my cards who keeps them in the case what. kind of psycho are you Killers. especially when they have the nice like. bumps there's bumps on them I popped all. my sick cards out of the cases I'd carry. them in my pocket constantly dude I I. had a jealous friend I think I've told. told you this I had a sick collection. dude all my older cousins everybody I.

had the nicest collection did you really. I had bins of. cards so many. cards where are they there's probably. still in my parents in fact I'm certain. they are I check on them time to. time bring here what hell test. birdie that's going to be worth. something I have about $27 worth of. baseball cards stowed away dude uh but I. one time we were at my friend's house.

and the cards were left unguarded came. back upstairs all of them were bent on. the floor and he said my little brother. did it I said bro you're a jealous [ __ ]. what you destroyed my cards I didn't I. didn't call him out on it I never called. him out on it what the [ __ ] I'm certain. it wasn't the little brother yeah dude. he would never and also you let. him maybe he did have him do his bidding. dude think he did maybe. he's probably like he he put gave his.

brother a satchel of. [Laughter]. goldfish Louis bit like yes my. Lord oh my God that's [ __ ]. [ __ ] yeah I forgot about that yeah. one Christmas I got the entire I didn't. have any now look at me dude surrounded. by memorabilia I mean that was just B my. cards oo good luck Bend in this yeah. true it's a jersey you can't now I know. why I need that thing in glass dude. Shilling oh yeah yeah put that in glass. who knows who's going to turn on me next.

get some lasers that be a guard dog move. scribble on my Curt. Shilling I would never do that if you. scribble on my CT chilling baseball I'm. going to [ __ ] you up do that so it's. fine yo how bad you think you [ __ ] guard. dog up if you held the baseball in. Vengeance and punched him with it like a. like a roll of quarters just [ __ ]. furious D dude you might have to you. definitely I would kill I might it might. go through him it's a shilling signed. ball dude this thing's got a automatic. velocity of like 90 if somebody. vandalizes your home can't you attack. aren't you like legally allowed to. attack them there was a story I doubt.

it's. true uh it can't be true uh somebody. broke into Randy Johnson's house and he. started winging balls at him can't be. true maybe look it up guard if true. that's the greatest story of all time. Randy Johnson started pegging balls at. you yeah you're just trying to break. into a guy's house all of a sudden. there's like a 66 [ __ ]. monster 100 mph balls at you that would. you think he keeps him up like people. keep katanas above the bed he just. [ __ ]. right in the chest too he throws it. right in your chest don't smudge the.

autograph dude it's Kurt trilling feels. good though feel that ball though it is. nice to feel I don't care Shane all the. best oh man dude how nice is that thing. to hold that's beautiful brand new B. it's true no it can't be true no it's. not true but Randy Johnson claimed that. he kept them by his bed just in case he. needed to he that okay that's probably. what I saw I'm a dumbass I'm thinking of. [ __ ] who's the wide receiver Randy. Moss thinking someone broke into Randy. Moss's house my gu he's hitting right in.

the numbers right in the chest like he's. not even a [ __ ] quarterback the big. you're talking about The Big Unit yo. that would be crazy how tall was he I. said 66 I think he might be 69 dude 69. is outrageous you think the hood could. dunk on him what you think the hood. could dunk on him there's no way the. hood could ever dunk The King doome The. King doome yeah right that was an. embarrassing video yeah that was. absolutely disgusting yeah we watched a. video watch a video of a white guy going. around saying I'll give anybody anybody.

in the hood $1,000 if they can dunk on. me yeah pretty frustrating non-eventful. yeah it was a pretty uh pretty Sinister. video RJ a. 610 610 Google yeah. what Beast it's like a catapult the. whole Hood a full trebet yeah it's a. Tre it's awesome yeah he's a man Hall of. Famer right he hit the bird with the. fast ball that was the guy who killed a. bird exped a bird it's pretty neat being.

a robber imagine being dude. how in the dark that'd be like bullets. dude oh my God just going through the. windows behind you quiet dud so that's a. real story he pegged him no nobody broke. in he claimed he kept the B oh in case. he had it ready he probably did keep the. bin ready dude seems like a tail a cool. tail to tell fun The Big Unit I keep. thinking the Big Hurt The Big Unit dude. probably kept those things on him the.

big hurt's such a good nickname the Big. Hurt is the best Big Hurt might be the. nicest he wasn't wrapped up in all the. steroid stuff was he beloved Frank. Thomas now he is now he's just taking. [ __ ] tea on television he's selling. [ __ ] testosterone maybe he was on the. juice maybe he was on the juice. dude what you got guardan you're filling. out Bro you've been eating dude you're. becoming a man before you're a man for. our eyes you're become fat you're becom. a man I've never seen you become a man. like this you dude when you [ __ ].

first started here you were such a whimp. you you you're a [ __ ] man dude you're. loud you're talking oh you said you're. telling us to hold on and then you have. nothing to say I didn't I didn't say. you're a [ __ ] man dude you used to be. you used to be Diary of a Wimpy. podcaster you're [ __ ] big time dude. God damn that a young Gunner at the. stage before our eyes dude before our. eyes become never did never did juice of.

course big hurt he call himself the. clean hurt for that reason clean. hurt sh he's just thick dude we were. actually discussing your uh domestic. situation meaning the one down the. street oh yeah oh the Mumble [ __ ] the. Mumble house dude you guys Amigos yeah. Shane brought up you guys we're. backstage thinking about you and Shane o. Conor is mumbling to each other all the. time I actually took the trash out last. week so could you take the trash out. this week that's good way dude.

what know I have spots tonight. dude two of the biggest mumblers ever. yeah it's true Shane was in the green. room with us this. weekend oh yeah Mary and Mary rinsky and. Shane were there it was truly a. wonderful weekend you were just thinking. about me we were thinking about you a. lot thanks guys we were Shane mumbled so. much I genuinely thought you were with. us on the trip he's almost worse than me. he. yeah but I get I get my I have my.

moments for sure I have to scream what. at both of them and then they don't. change the [ __ ] the octaves or. whatever the decimals Remain the exact. same. like. [Laughter]. what I've always been yelled at for it. for mumbling yeah my dad yelled at me. the other day what he say nobody could. freaking understand you at the time Sean. trying to talk to me I can't freaking. understand him my dad punked me. yesterday he called me Matt.

Hannity like [ __ ] [ __ ] it's called dumb. happy birthday you did get it you did. get you get you got it you got to. destroy the wers on Fox this week my mom. was so happy. she's my mom's I can my mom every good. mom's dream is that their son gets on. Fox and is like what the [ __ ] going on. with kids these days days when why. aren't they respectful like. me every mom's dream is a nice gentle a. nice Fox News gentleman I know dude I. know my dad hit me with Matt Hannity I.

was like yeah you [ __ ] Matt. Hannity's very F mat very good hey Matt. Hannity [ __ ] yeah we've been getting. [ __ ] over by our dad every once while. the dads get a funny one in dude and it. is good dude messing with Shane Squatch. was undeniably funny back when I lived. at my parents Phil would [ __ ] with me we. going go messing with Shane squash was. [ __ ] a be be Jerky. commercial dads love commercials ever.

since the budweis are frogs dads have. just been where's the beef they love. catchphrases completely taken down right. now I think their Collective mind is on. the show Yellowstone for some reason. they all talk about y every time I talk. to someone they're like d you seen. yellow stuff Phil hasn't get gotten hit. with it yet is he a big TV series head. or he's more Sports guy my he was on the. wire for a while this past year which. made me very happy that's pretty tight. he liked the wire that a treat pretty. enjoyable did I tell you about his shoes. no was he rocking he's got he got black. and white Air Force One oh you did tell.

me that yeah who got him I think my. sister yeah he has no idea what they are. he's just been rocking he's just been. wearing them with like light jeans and a. ducked in [ __ ] t-shirt dude wearing. Air Force. Ones no idea he has no idea he's. stomping in his Air Force One he's. stomping dude big. ball he goes to the Elks and he says G. give me two.

beers come on dude this is. it oh dude think about like the you know. in those old videos they do like that. triple take while the drum went down. while he's driving in his car he's in a. CRV like Kia dude Kia are nice now true. I saw I think a Kia boy got at a car on. my block the other day no there was a. kid that just got smashed into a park. car you saw a young [ __ ] an urban. Yuppy just. going just sitting there going oh man I.

have to go back to the local Bard and. spread communism yeah true how am I. going to get there man my Kia has been. smashed by uh well the Kia was the car. was the missile basically so he had his. regular car this looked more like a. Subaru type same thing Subaru got. smashed by a Kia boy yeah Subaru guy got. smashed by yeah k c yeah Kia the white. man man in a Subaru dude the white man. Subaru got Ki out the white colon the. colonizer child in a Subaru yeah man.

it's all about like love yeah got. smashed up by a Kia boy was just going. well he hears his aunts and uncles like. how you doing down there in the city. it's not that bad it's actually not as. bad as you say what. happened I guess another white guy must. have smashed your. car uh actually it doesn't matter what. the race was but yes it was a black guy. oh my ring doorbell picked it up it was. four black and I am furious at them yeah. the doors were all open so it was a car.

it must have been a car full of people. just all got out and booked it dude I. pull I was walking my dogs D and just. like oh no yeah that's fun though KY bro. got if if you were a young youth if you. were a young War doog dude being a k boy. would be about the funniest thing of all. time unbelievable crashing a car and all. of you running and all of you getting. away with it I smil dude I saw it I saw. all the doors well only only two there. was only two doors that could get open. front and back the other ones were. smashed against the car it's like there. was people in the back people in the. front everone must have got out and ran. I'm like what a funny [ __ ] thing we.

used to take my uh my uncle's car like. my we would like take my parents cars. and like just we would try to like split. a case of Bud Light and just be like all. right our parents are asleep let's drive. their car as fast as we can yeah sick. it's awesome roie's hitting the Tesla on. us that was scary that was so hot that. was so scary I closed my eyes yeah I. watched the whole time and I was like I. might I was the only thing I thought. about was like dude if I died right now. in this car that' be pretty crazy aome. pretty tight dude pretty tight just.

going down on like just hitting like a. concrete [ __ ] Texas with Ries and a. Tesla it explodes what if that was his. whole plan dude he's like I've had. enough of this [ __ ] like we're done I'm. [ __ ] we're all going. down like uh can you just like still put. my thing. out I you know Fox News Fox News was. sick congratulations Fox News out I'm. pump dude you got to say when's the. pendulum going to swing back when the. [ __ ] he going to swing back I can't.

believe Will Smith [ __ ] slapped can. you believe that Amber Heard we've been. calling her Amber. turd well what's going on in the where. we at 48 1. hour my mother hind 57 hell yeah I like. mine dude I mean how is it done every. week I just don't understand how do we. keep doing it yeah I just wake up and I. go we'll see. we'll see well I got a funny story for. you I had to work out today yeah there.

two hot ladies in the no the reason I go. to this trainers is to this is the worst. case yeah yeah two hot ladies I and my. trainer was like all right cuz I worked. yesterday and I'm sore yeah so he was. like all right we'll we'll just do. cardio today so I was like great yes. [ __ ] dude I'm not doing cardio for an. hour yeah it's Terri we did and half of. them it's all like CrossFit type. workouts so like you just have to like. dude I had to carry. weight above my head straight above my. head and just walk up and down the gym.

but it's like a very narrow gym so I'm. walking I have to like be like excuse me. pass two hot ladies doing [ __ ] like. hot stretches back dude straight above. my head dude going like. this you you walk by and go. dlight com want to go the most dude the. front of my shirt's up the bottom of my. bell is hanging.

out you the Chita banana man dude. absolutely Mr. T Me. banana excuse me. ma'am B me. mom m this Ting so heavy on my head oh. why you making me c this Ting on my head. so bad I had to say and there was. another guy that works there and my. trainer they were both just watching. like literally like staring at me doing. it while I was doing it I had to be like. what's up guys and they're like all.

right. sorry sorry we're doing that the ladies. you had to tell you was up no my trainer. and another guy watching they're just. watching me walk down. [Laughter]. and yeah I go what's up dude like stop. watching me do this and they were both. like yeah you're. right they were going what the [ __ ] like. what the [ __ ] is this dude. my little nub dong sticking out the. front of my chorge.

D just so ladies are making it grow. you're like oh they're so [ __ ] pretty. please put my arms down I was wearing I. was wearing a gray t-shirt it's drenched. yeah yeah I'm [ __ ] disgusting what's. wrong with sweating I feel like there's. no there's nothing wrong with it but. when you look like me and you're covered. in sweat going oh you got to P look. insane. dude I mean the last the I've been. lifting the in the last like 3 weeks. yeah and looking swo thanks man I get. DEF Flex now front my friends like.

looking swo I like to scream like Conor. MCG. uh but every time I've worked out with. him he's had a class he he also teaches. full classes oh so then I'm the only one. in the gym working and then a class of. like 15 people shows up and they all. have to wait until I'm done and they. always get there for the end which is. always conditioning they always see me. like like like can't do three push-ups.

just like dude that's you're you're. fully maxed out I'm maxed anyone who. knows anything like man that guy hit his. limit yeah I was benching bench and then. come on man yeah what do you you want to. be like the Russian from Rock you want. to be the Russian from Rocky 4 just. [ __ ] there they come in just full. cyborg they all sit there there there's. been suck that would [ __ ] me up five. people and I'm doing like lunges with no. weight and you're just your legs are. just. shaking that does suck actually I don't. really like it took me a while for me to.

wa like Get over people watch me work. out that was [ __ ] me up for a long. time I used to not like it's fine if. they're also working out but when people. are literally waiting yeah and then I'm. taking. breaks like dude just give me like. [ __ ] one. minute yeah like remember doing track. meets it was like 55 [ __ ] people. sitting around and your turn to run. you're like can I just not no I never. ran one can I just keep sitting around. shop put I had to go up and [ __ ]. pretend I was good at that I was. horrendous at it that's what they did to.

me dud I was three times the size of. everybody else doing it yeah and I threw. it two. feet yeah I thought I could get out of. running by shot put and I embarrassed. myself in like some area Championship. they I was automatically placing we. didn't have any shot Putters yeah I. think I did good in like the regular. meat I did decent they were like you go. to areas and I just got obliterated yeah. I just took the girl ball I throw the. girl ball that's not a bad idea it's fun. no one it wasn't serious enough people. were really checking I still lost I. still lost but it was the only way I.

could come even. close it' be nice to like bring act as. if you're so serious you have your own. ball like no I brought this from my. thing out throw it [ __ ] 90 ft [ __ ]. whistle like that why is this ball. whistling yeah be pretty yeah throw like. a regular baseball just gun it that'd be. fun all right let's switch over to the. patreon what do you say yeah the. patreon's going to be big patreon is. going to be big guys join the number one. patreon in the world I mean it is what. it is man it's not a big deal yeah or. don't you know if you don't want to I. don't want we're already reach number.

one I don't want to get too ahead of the. rest of them so we reach number one you. want to stay off I'm thinking about. capping it all together just being like. no more no more new guys man yeah just. you guys so hurry up don't try to get in. there if you want I mean but yeah it's. probably going to be closed off forever. and super exclusive and you'll be. missing out for the rest of your life. that would suck oh that would suck can. you imagine can you imagine not wanting. another hour at least of this crazy yeah. well you know you know I mean if you're. at your job it's like you want another. hour of mental freedom from o extreme. boredom o or you could you know your.

feelings you start get your job going I. don't want to do. this God that does you escape that for. one more hour you could Escape that. waking up in the morning to a job you. don't want to go to yeah is there. anything worse I mean yes but well. that's a pretty tough time pretty bad. you know especially in the developed. world that's like the number one thing. that's [ __ ] yeah let's go right let's. go right to the patreon all right. patreon.com goodbye.