They Finally Caught Me

Today we're going to talk about us. getting arrested. I didn't think we were going to bring. this up. Wait, y'all got arrested? I did not think we were ever going to. talk about. Can you guys guess who got arrested out. of us? Out of me, Mav, and Kate. Yeah. Who do you think GOT ARRESTED? WHAT? WHY WOULD ME? HEY, that's what she said, bro. That's. what she said. What? What do you think. he got arrested for? Like, like honestly, not joking. Like, honestly, like one of us got arrested. First-degree murder. For what? First-degree murder. That's heavy. Harper kind of heavy.

You I mean Matt Matt did just buy a. sword. Oh. yeah. I I walked in the house and they. were fighting with swords and like. I'm talking an hour before this episode. me and Matt bought a sword and a spear. Like a real one. Yeah. And I don't intend on using it, but but. you know, Mike, this is. it's a just in case kind of thing. And. and speaking of uh murder and swords, I. saw this lady, she got stabbed or no, she stabbed her boyfriend 108 times and. then killed her dog.

and then when the police got there, she. started like stabbing herself. Oh, what a story. And then. that's kind of. you know, it gets better. Wow. That I'm so. SHE GOES TO COURT. SHE goes to court. to cuz you know she murdered her. boyfriend. Mhm. But why did she murder her dog? Her. boyfriend's her dog. THAT'S WHAT YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT. I. WAS LIKE, WHY YOU have to kill the dog? Yeah. That dog didn't do nothing. out of everything. And so she goes to court and the the. jury or judge or whatever, they they give her 2 years probation and.

community service. That's not real. All because she was smoking and they. were like, "Oh, well, she wasn't in her. right mind.". Are you kidding me? That was the most LOL story ever. Yeah, that was crazy. She stabbed him. 108 times and got away with it. And so I. went and bought a sword. It's always hundred something times, man. every news article. It's like it's. always like the most brutal. But I don't intend on I don't intend on. using the sword. But. yeah, why did you why did you buy the. sword? Well, I got a So, so spear's more.

realistic. Yeah. Well, I heard this lady, she got. she didn't even like have to go to jail. and she stabbed someone 108 times. So. So you went out and bought a sword. The purge coming soon just in case, you. know, if you can get away with things. Well, no. In reality, they just wanted. to set up a target in the backyard and. see who could throw the spear more. accurately AT THE TARGET. HOLD UP RIGHT THERE. I GOT TO TELL I GOT. to let you know something. I got to let. you know the LOL Bros podcast is. officially out. THAT'S RIGHT. LOL BROS. LINK IN THE DESCRIPTION. GO SUBSCRIBE.

RIGHT NOW. ACTUALLY, we didn't have that planned. when we bought it, but then that. happened. It developed. Wait, this is how to curl your lashes if. you are in trouble. Wait, what do you mean in trouble? What. kind of trouble you in? Yeah. What? What do you mean trouble? You mean like you you need your lashes. curled in that moment and you don't have. a lash. You get pulled over and you got to you. got to bat your eyes at the police. officer. You're in trouble. I'm in trouble. No, but um look guys, look. You put them above your eyelids.

What the? Now you just have no. eyelashes. Okay. Have you cried to like get out of. a ticket? Um my sister pulled over twice and one. of us. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Not only twice. You've. only been driving like what? Three. years. How long? That's almost every year. I started driving when I was 16. Yeah, you're 19. So, yeah, you've been. pulled over every year and a half you. get pulled over. That's a horrible record. And um the first time it was a female. cop, so there was no reason for me to. cry. She was not going to feel bad for. me. And.

that's that's true. Like like a female cop is not does not. care if I'm crying. And then the second. time it was a guy. And I was so in shock. I couldn't cry. I was like, "Ah, like I. really wish I could cry right now, but I. couldn't.". You couldn't? I couldn't. When I get a ticket, I was trying to though. I was like, "Maybe you'll feel bad.". A female cop pulled me over once. Wait, what were you gonna say? When you get a ticket, what? I'm going to walk out of the car and. slap the. N. You're going to prison for that. Don't do that. It's like this Tik Tok is. like showing my cop my wallet and it's. like, "Have you seen it? It's like,

maybe. Yeah, we won." They're like, "Maybe.". And then I whip out the wallet super. fast out of their coat. Bro, that's a hard game. It's going to be. like, "Here it is. Here. air. No. Oh, no. Well, I got pulled over by a female. cop once and guess what? She pulled me. over for and tried to give me a ticket. for it. This is the craziest thing. Your lights being on, huh? Your lights being off? You know, that's actually a myth. Like, wait, you're talking about inside or. outside the car. Inside? Yeah. You know, like the light inside. your car? Yes. My mom used to say, "The police are. going to come if I turn it on.". Yeah. You Yeah, exactly. That's That's.

what every parent says. Every parent. says, "What?". Yeah. That's not. That's what they say to get you TO TURN. THE LIGHT ON. MY MOM BELIEVE THAT. Every. parent SAYS THAT. TURN OFF THE LIGHT. WE'RE GOING TO GET PULLED OVER. I DON'T KNOW WHAT movie they watched in. the ' 80s that made them think that, but. it ain't real. You can have whatever light you want on. in your car. I turned one on in my car. That's the. only way it'll drive by itself at night. Oh. Oh, really? Yeah. So, I have to have a actual I have. a video light for driving at night. So, it drive by itself. No, you can you can keep those on as. much as you want, which is crazy.

That's wild. But anyways, no, that's not what I got. pulled over for. We got we Well, we have. a friend that when she gets pulled over, she doesn't cry. You want to say what. she does? Scream, Paige. No, I don't think we should say that. I want to know. No, I don't like that. It's just a little ridiculous. Well, tell me and I'll cut it out if I. have to. You know, I don't I just me personally, I don't like the story. I just don't. want to hear it again. You had to go to. You had to go to the police station. So, I was 3 years old. Uh. you went to the popo station at 3.

You were Yeah. So my mom car was. thugging at 3. That's crazy. My mom was absolutely psychotic. Did they book you at 3? Did you get. booked? No. So how much you have to do? No. So what happened was uh we were. driving through my elementary school or. we were driving my sister home from. elementary school and I kept wanting to. unbuckle my car seat and I kept like. just like unbuckling it and buckling it. and then finally my mom said, "If you. unbuckle it one more time, I'm calling. the police." So I started laughing. Then.

I unbuckled it. And then she drove me. straight to the police station. And then. the police had to talk with me about how. I can't do that. And she's like, "Do you. want me to take you in? Want me to take. you in?" "No." "So buckle." AND AND I. And and I was like, "Okay, that's crazy. I KNOW. YOU BETTER NOT TURN THAT LIGHT ON. EITHER." I. I WAS I WAS genuinely so scared. I was. like, "No way." Cuz I thought it was. actually And for some reason in my mind, I had a Coke bottle going through a um a. line like um a you know that thing. Um,

I on earth in my mind I had that going. through when she was talking to me, the. police. And then ever. Wait, no. No. I don't know. No, I don't. know what you're talking. about. You have a Coke bottle going. through a line. A Coke bottle going through the cashier. Like the. That's what you were thinking about. Oh, like the. Yeah. Yeah. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, not before. No, just the conveyor belt. Yeah, conveyor belt at the grocery. store. I had that going through my mind. for some reason every time I. And you remember this? At three. At three. Yes. Um, and I also like it it.

was so weird. And then now what was her. name again? Miss Officer. You guys remember the name? I feel like. this was last year. I don't feel like. this was when you were three. She was at. Wow. Yeah. Officer Rapolo or whatever. And. um, is she dead now? Oh, I don't know. How old do you think you are? You think. like people you met when you were a KID. ARE ALL DEAD? ARE THESE EVERYONE SHE MET WHEN she was. three has passed away? Yeah, they're probably dead now. No. And then I saw what 10 years ago, bro. I saw her actually 11. So.

anyways, no, I'm kidding. No, but what's. it called? Literally like I was so. scared. Like mom, what was what was the. thought process? Like. what do you mean what the thought. process was? Like why would she take me to the. police? Not to be like, oh, the same. thing happened to me, but the same exact. thing happened to me actually. Really? I. was like, we were at a new. You got a prison talk. about the cop came out himself and um we. were at a New Year's Eve party and it. was just like all of the families in our. neighborhood would go to this one house.

every every year and one of them was a. cop and I like was like refusing to get. in my car seat and my mom was like. trying to get me to get in it and she. was like, "I'm going to go to jail if. you don't." And I was like, "No, you're. not. No, you're not." And she went. inside and she got the guy that was a. cop and he came out. He's like, "Okay, I'm going to have to take your mom to. jail if you don't get in your car seat.". And I was like, "Okay, I don't want. that.". Well, bro, Cash had a prison talk. Yeah. He was a violent child. No way. We never found out why you got pulled.

What happened when you got pulled over. by it? Yeah. Nobody. It seems like nobody. cares. I do. Yeah. At least Joe cares. I guess tell Joe your story. No, it's fine. Well, you have two unfinished stories, don't you? What' you say? You have two. Yeah, I have two unfinished stories, but. nobody wanted to let me lead, so it's. fine. Girl cop first. He finished the girl cop one. I never started it. He never started. I got pulled over by a female cop. What? Gone. No, you did. Finish it. You finished it. What happened? What. happened? Well, I know what happened.

But do y'all want me to say? Okay. You only know. You want TO TAKE YOUR STORY? OKAY. NO, NO, NO. DRIVING. LET ME OKAY. NO, let me. talk. Let me talk. I'll tell the story. since you want to know so bad. Okay. Okay. Harper, get off your phone. Sorry. Oops. Oops. Oops. Oopsies. So, I got pulled over by. people. All right, guys. And we interrupt this. broadcasting session to bring you our. sponsor. Our sponsor for this week's. episode is actually myself. You can go. watch my YouTube channel, Kate Marie. I. post lots of cool videos over there. And.

I do get made fun of, but I just wanted. to let you guys know that I do have my. own YouTube channel in case you did not. know about it and you wanted to go. subscribe and watch my videos. Yeah. Or or or unsubscribe. unsubscribe. from for interrupting my whole guys. My. channel is literally linked on this. channel somewhere. Just scroll around. and you'll see me. Anyways, uh one time I got pulled over. by a female cop and. something pulled over by a female cop. Wait, and then and then.

Sorry, I just I thought never got this. far. You thought the interruption was coming. Yeah. And then. uh you're not going to believe what she. pulled me over for this. This was crazy. She pulled me over for speeding when. Huh? Not speeding. Yes. What? Speeding. What are you talking about? This is a great story. You got pulled. over for speeding. No. Well, you didn't listen, did you? She pulled me over for speeding, but. guess what? Chicken butt. I was. I was behind her.

Oh, that's actually crazy. And I started. So, how did that happen? How did you. know she were speeding? So, I started out in front of her. I'm. going the speed limit. Cop pulls up. behind me, right? Obviously, when a. cop's behind you, you don't speed. No. So, I'm going like I'm going like five. under. Who could? I'm going like five under, right? So, then she is No, she's in She's in front. of me. Sorry. So, I'm I'm like following. her. She's butchering this story. Okay. Yeah.

There. THERE WAS A COP IN FRONT OF YOU. NO, YOU WEREN'T THERE. YOU WEREN'T. THERE. BUT THERE'S SO MANY EASIER WAYS. TO SAY THERE WAS A COP IN FRONT OF YOU. OKAY, I'm restarting. I got pulled over. by a female cop and she was in front of. me and I'm behind her. So obviously I'm. like, "All right, I'm all going the same. speed.". Yeah. I'm like, "Obviously, I'm not. going to pass the cop." Like that'd be. crazy. Like people that pass the cop on. the highway. Crazy. Daredevils. Actually, I do that. If if if they are. going 60 and the speed limit is 70, I. will pass them going 70. Yeah. I'm not passing them. No. I mean, you pass them.

Yeah. Wait, what was it? Depends on what car I'm in. I like I. feel like the the car the cops on the. road like that though. They're like, you. ever seen the pace car for NASCAR where. it's like all the cars are behind him. until he gets OFF AND IT'S LIKE GO. HE EXITS THE HIGHWAY. IT'S LIKE. EVERYONE'S LIKE GO. THAT'S TRUE. But anyways, so I'm behind her and then. she pulls over in the left lane, drops. behind me, gets behind me. I'm like, "Oh, so that's how it's going to be.". And so then I'm making sure I don't.

speed. I'm like, "All right, I'm. chilling right here." And then she pulls. me over. And I'm like, what could she. possibly be pulling me over for right. now? I did nothing. I was just behind you. And then she pulls me over and said, "You were speeding." I said, "If I was. speeding, I was behind you. Doesn't that. mean you were speeding?" And she goes, "Oh, well, this is what she said.". "Well, I also pulled you over for. tailgating." I'm like, "Okay, now you're. just MAKING STUFF UP HERE. NEVER. TAILGATED YOU and you're just making. stuff up. You said I was speeding. Why.

Why didn't you leave with tailgating?". And so your speeding's a lie. That's a. lie. That never happened. You argued. with the cop. I did. And then I went I went to court. Never never had to pay it. Oh. Never had to pay the ticket. And then I. also went to court one time. I was I was. in a parade and I popped a wheelie on my. motorcycle in a parade with other. motorcycles. But the thing is all the. other motorcycles were dirt bikes and I. had a street bike. They're all popping. wheelies and whatever, right? I pop a. wheelie. A cop pulls me off the parade.

and gives me a ticket. Everyone around. him was like boo. like booing the cop. and I was like, "Why are you giving me a. ticket? Everyone else is doing it." And. he was like, "The parade line ended. right there and you popped the wheelie. right here. It was like a 50 foot. difference." I'm like, "Are you kidding. me right now?". 50 ft is a lot of feet. It's a lot. Mhm. And anyways, I went to court over that. ticket, too. Never had to pay it. But it wasn't marked. Yeah, it wasn't marked. Like, it was. It wasn't like This is where the parade. ends. Yeah. Like the parade is still going. Everybody's still going. There's babies. riding on top of cars. Like there's four-wheelers all over the.

street. like guys doing like donuts. Yeah, it was like. Okay, this is really off topic. What? I don't know what just happened to me, but I like something is wrong. I'm. convinced something is wrong with my. heart now. That just made me really. think it. But like you remember I told. you about that how like sometimes I feel. like my heart beating is like off. Heart failure. No, I don't KNOW WHAT IT IS. OH MY GOSH. Oh my god. Oh my goodness. Oh my. goodness.

Oh my goodness. I smell my BURNT HAIR. SHE STUCK YOU. YO, you weren't SUPPOSED TO ACTUALLY TASE. HIM. YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO just scare him. What? You stuck. Shut up. No. That was crazy. Just tased me, bro. Bro, THAT SCARED ME. HOW'S your leg? Not okay. Sh. She stuck it to it, too. Bro, IS THAT BREAD MARK FROM IT?

NO, I saw that mosquito bite before. Were you aiming for it? BRO, SHE LITERALLY AIM for my mosquito. bite. She was trying to heal you. She was like, I'll get the venom out. Yo, that hurt. Did it really. get this thing? I want. Please. No. Okay. Just one time. Yeah, MAYBE JUST ONE TIME. STOP. Please stop. What would be just. stop? No. Did it really hurt? Okay. Okay. Okay. It's a really weak. It It shouldn't be. as bad as like a normal one. SIT DOWN. OKAY. I'M NOT GOING TO DO IT.

I BOUGHT LIKE THE WEAKEST ONE. OKAY. Sit down. I'm not going to do it. It's always like lined up. Hit jump. I'm not going to do it. You. have my word. Can you tase Maverick to see if it. hurts? I'm not I know it hurts. Sit down. K. Can you just get rid of it? Okay. Yeah. Sit down. I'm not going to. shock you. It's really. I'm not going to. Did it actually hurt? His leg went like this. It was so. that was getting tasted. She held it down, too. You guys ever. seen Ice Age when the squirrel gets. electrocuted by lightning? He's like,

"YEAH, [Laughter]. that was so fake.". That's so fake. What? Okay. No. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Okay, come back in. Okay. Okay. Okay. SHE'S CRYING. SHE'S ACTUALLY CRYING. OKAY. COME HERE. I'M SORRY. I didn't. really know it freak you out that bad. I can't. Oh my gosh. She has tears.

Where's your Okay, you got to get your. microphone. You You threw it across the. room. What's crazy is the difference between. you and Harper. Like I know Harper's. kind of like I kind of want to get. tased. Yeah, I do. She kind of wants to You could tase. yourself. Actually, I've done it before. Does it hurt? I feel like I'm going to throw. it. It stops hurting as soon as you let. go. It hurts for a second, but as soon. as you let go of the button, the thing. goes away. You can't me to grim. Your water's spilling. Oh no. It doesn't like keep hurting after my.

water all over the carpet. You know, it feels like FEELS LIKE. YOU'RE GETTING FEELS LIKE YOU'RE GETTING. PINCHED. I just spilled my water all over the. place. It feels like something grabbed your. leg. YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT IT FEELS LIKE, HARPER? WHAT? I can tase you. No. Kate just spilled her water and. everything and JUST LEFT IT. NO. Not myself. Did that flick on you? Yes. I think my I think my water on my sock. just flicked on Harper. That was. disgusting. I saw it. It did. Well, we're going barefoot now. That's not water. Y'all scared Kate too. bad. K's peeing again. Bro, WHY IS WE'RE GOING BAREFOOT?

E. WHY DO you carry that around? Like it's. like your cell phone. K. Kate, come. here. She has it in her mouth now. She's been. carrying that everywhere. It's a fidget for me, too. Kate, what? We're on a podcast. But I spill water. Yeah, but. I got to clean up my mess. Yo. All right. Well, Gate's quitting the. podcast. Yeah, finally. She's going to just do her own YouTube. videos. Yeah, for real. Oh, no. What was worse than that, cop, is one time I'm working with my dad and.

we're out on a job, working, you know, trying to pay bills for the family. I can't believe it. And we're about to wrap. You were trying to play bills for the. family, man. You were saving up to buy. like Call of Duty. No, that's not true. That is true. And so dad dad gets a. call. I like how he's tiding his toe. Oh, wait. Never mind. Dad gets a call. Never mind. Never mind. I am taking your son to jail. And I'm taking his motorcycle. Oh, I was the son. Yeah. Yeah. So, a cop.

I thought me, by the way, dad acted mad. when he got there. Dad was laughing. So, SO WAS I. WE. THOUGHT IT'S HILARIOUS. YOU'RE GOING to. jail. I know. I I listen, I have a lot of cop. stories because I got my motorcycle. license when I was 14. And in Oklahoma, you get your license when you're 14 for. a motorcycle. And you know, being 14 on. a motorcycle, you're kind of a target. You know, you're a target and you're not smart. So, you're going to wreak havoc on the. entire town. Yeah. You know, you got to pop wheelies,

burn out, you know, do the whole thing. So, I drove out of town into like the. country and I get back to like these. this like lake area. It's like wooded. and it's like around the lake. It's like. curvy roads. It's like trees everywhere. And I get back there and I'm like I take. off and I just start like using like a. racetrack because no one's back there. ever. So I'm just like using like a. racetrack. I've never seen Cash so scared in my. life. That was so funny. I can't. Anyways, and I have I have my my AirPods.

in and I'm just going got my AirPods in. vibing the music and then a cop I. finally see a cop in my like my mirror. and he's got his lights on. I was like. uhoh. And I pulled over and this cop. comes. cuz you're doing like what 50 and like a. 20. uh no Yeah, it's like 50 60 like a 20. mph area. So you're like 40 50 mph over the speed. limit. I'm zooming and I get pulled over and. this cop comes up to me and he's mad. He's very bad because he thinks I was. out trying to outrun him and apparently.

he's been chasing me for like a mile or. two and I didn't know. He's chasing him through the corner so. he's like trying to keep up. Yeah. Oh, we weren't as scared though. Yeah. That was nothing. I'm imagining this cop trying to keep up. with you. HE'S LIKE, "WE GOT A RUNNER. WE GOT A RUNNER." IT'S A SMALL TOWN. THEY'VE BEEN WAITING FOR A RUNNER. AND I KNOW YOU you're listening to. freaking Ellie Golding in your head. Turn the lights. Yeah. And Uh he gets up to me and he's. really mad cuz he thought I was out. running him. And then another cop comes.

from this side of the road. They called. another cop to block me off cuz they. thought I was running. So they cut off. the road. You were just listening to. Yeah. And I was like I was like, "Oh, I. was vibing. I'm sorry guys." Anyways, they were very mad. They called my dad. They said they were going to like take. me into the slammer. You know. what's the slammer? They were going to You don't They're. going to book me. My whole back just I can't move. Yeah, you can. I think you can. So, is that when you got to rest it?

Okay. I told you that. No. There you go. Okay. I can't I can't. Anyways, the cops is mad and he's on the. phone with my dad telling me he's going. to like impound my bike. License going. to be taken away. Impound your bike. Yeah, because. he's basically saying he's going to ruin. Cash's life. Do you guys ever feel like. money is just flying out of your. accounts towards subscriptions you don't. want anymore? This happens to me all the. time and it's super frustrating. I bet. if I asked you what subscriptions you're.

paying for and how much you wouldn't be. able to name them all. And I know it's. annoying to cancel subscriptions. Sometimes you have to sit on hold for. hours just to talk to somebody so you. can cancel. But our sponsor for today's. episode, Rocket Money, is here to help. cancel those pesky subscriptions. Rocket. Money is a personal finance app that. finds and cancels your unwanted. subscriptions and monitors your spending. and helps lower your bills. I can see. all of my subscriptions in one place.

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going to rocketmoney.com/lolodcast. That's rocketmoney.com/lol. podcast. Oh wow. And my on the phone he's like, "No, please don't. Like I'll come get him.". Like uh blah blah blah. And yeah, my dad. saved me from the slammer. This is something. Shout outs to you, James Baker. You are. a hero. Who wants to see my trick with my rubber. band that I do all day in school? So, boom. Boom. Actually pretty cool. Look. Or or this. Oh, the finger. God.

Wait. No. I thought that was actually. pretty powerful. Yeah. Did they have you in handcuffs? They did. Really? You ever been to handcuffs, harbor? I mean, from the dentist. What the. what? Wait. You know the toys that. NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. I DON'T KNOW. SO, please explain. What the Why does the dentist? It backfired. Actually, wait. Why does my rubber band gun. backfire? Okay. Wait. Sorry. Sorry. Explain. You're too young to be in handcuffs. No, it it was it was.

First of all, you need a new dentist. No, my dentist. I was I was chained down to the floor. because I KEPT UM. WHAT? This is so not true. This is so true. Is it true? Your mom's SAYING IT'S NOT TRUE. OKAY, LET'S HEAR IT. LET'S HEAR IT. I got handcuffs handcuffs from the. dentist. So, after I get my teeth done, I go to to the toys and I pick out. something and I got handcuffs. When you go to the dentist, you still. Well, maybe next time. Don't say I got.

handcuffed after. That's pretty different. I got handcuffed by the dentist. I got. handcuffs from the dentist. Too different. Complete. When you do. Honestly though, I was surprised like. doctor's offices don't handcuff kids. more often, but maybe trying to give. kids shots and they're running around. the room. Yeah. Or like they honestly. needed to handcuff you when you were. getting your COVID test. Oh, I 100% NEED A HANDCUFF. HE WAS LIKE HE WAS LITERALLY LIKE, "CAN. Y'ALL HOLD ME DOWN?" HE'S LIKE, "I can. do this. I just need people to hold ME. DOWN.". WELL, WE TOLD THAT STORY, RIGHT?

YEAH. YEAH. When I was trying to knock. out my nurse on accident, if you guys. didn't see that episode, I was getting a. COVID test. Every time the nurse would. stick it up my nose, like I was like, "Okay, I'm ready. I'm fully ready. go. and she'd stick it up and I would like. my natural instinct was to just hit her. and every time I did she do I was like. and SHE WAS LIKE WHY'D YOU HIT ME? cuz. I'm. My apologies. Terribly sorry. Terribly sorry. Let's try. And we're in the middle of nowhere. Mexico in a village. So, literally a. village. Lady barely even speaks English. And I'm. like, I'm sorry. Like, let's do it. again. I got like I'm going to sit on my.

hands this time. Like, let's go. She. does it. And I bam, whack the nurse. again. And she she's mad now, obviously. I mean, and then next time I was like, "All right, Matt, you're going to have. to hold me." So, M's like holding my. arms backwards and they do it. And man, did I They just like they. No, he didn't kick his legs, but his. head was everywhere. And my head was like my head was going. everywhere like this. So then we had to. back me up to a wall and I backed up to. a wall and Matt's holding my arms and. she goes I was like barely got it and. then she was like we really need more. but this is fine. I was like.

oh. it was bad too cuz she was the only. nurse for like 200 miles. Yeah. Like. that was the only one. That would be so I hated COVID test. I. had to get one every week. Every week. We should do CO tests on the pub. I'm. not. No, we should. Oh, I'm doing that. I literally I'm buying that again. I I I've had the idea for a while. Um. this is not Cash's idea. It's mine. Uh. we should go through through each. other's drafts. That was my idea. No. Why are you trying to take away from my.

idea? No, it's my idea, boy. That is my idea. Is there Okay, y'all need to come to. rock, paper, scissors. Whose idea was. it? No, it was my idea. out of out of three. How about rock paper scissors? Out of. nothing. No, out of three. Ready? Rock, paper, scissors. You know, rock, paper, scissors don't. lie. Rock, paper, scissors. Shoot. Okay. Rock, paper, scissors. Don't lie. Rock, paper, scissors. Might lie. Yeah, exactly. Ready? Rock, paper, scissors. Shoot. Rock, paper, scissors. Shoot. What the?

You suck at rock paper. Fine. It was Harper's IDEA. LET'S GO. BUT ANYWAYS, we're not doing that yet. Oh. So, uh, we'll do it next episode. No, I dropped. it for another day. Wait, I had another story about a COVID. test. What was that? Oh, we probably. like shouldn't announce this, but. but I'm going to say it anyway. But. this is not advice. Don't do. Well, actually, don't do anything you. say on the podcast. Yeah. Disclaimer, don't ever listen. Everything we say is a joke. Everything we say, do the opposite of. that.

Don't No, just don't do anything we say. Um, Maverick needed to go to Colia. Mhm. And he I forgot why you couldn't. go, but we needed a COVID test. And. Maverick needed a COVID test done. And. this was like this was long long after. CO. This was like 6 months ago. You. remember this? Nope. What do you mean? No idea what you're talking about. You don't remember this? Nope. When you. went to Columbia, you don't remember. that really? Oh, yeah. Yeah. And we were like, why do you even need a.

COA test? Like, you don't need a COVID. test to do anything anymore. And. anyways, for some reason this one they. required a COA test and we like this is. dumb. But. I couldn't get back to the United. States. Yeah. And I was like, "Okay, so I'm. going to I'm going to take Mav's COVID. test for him." And I took my license and. I went to CVS or I took his license and. I went to CVS and I was like uh for Mic. Baker, please, bro. And I gave it to him. And the whole time. I was in CVS stressed and I'm like, "They going to know. They're going to. know it's not me. I'm going to be sent. to the slammer.".

They they took it and like no one ever. knew. Yeah, that sounds really bad. We weren't like. It sounds That sounds really Listen, we were very good citizens. IT WASN'T GETTING BACK TO AMERICA. WE. HAD TO DO SOMETHING. LISTEN, I was co free. I just couldn't. get a test there. So, I had to, you. know, we're good citizen. We didn't. bring anything back. Okay. We're good. citizens. Wait, why did you have to take a COVID. test once a week? Um for cheer. Really? Yeah. We had to go in My mom SAID OF.

COURSE MOM GOES WHAT? You were such a good liar. It's. terrible. You lying again. Yeah. But but no, but. [Laughter]. No, I Y'all know what I'm telling the. No, we don't. Every so serious. Like, yeah, once a week. Once a week for cheer. Shut up, bro. No, but like um what was I going to say? It was something probably another lie.

No. When you stand up for the pledge of. allegiance in school, some girls don't. stand up. And I'm like, what? Do you want to get kicked out of the. country? It's actually crazy. They don't stand for the pledge. No. Do you want to get kicked out of the. country? Like, come on, man. Like, don't even. like, first of all, so you don't stand. up. Not a good subject. No, I do not care. POPULAR 2024. NO, BUT I swear like like for the only.

old enough next election. Wait, you have. to be 25, don't you? Yeah. To be president 30. Hold up. Were you about to say Harper's. going to be old enough now next election. to run for president. in four years? You got to be 35. You think even IF IT WAS 25? NO. I thought I thought it was 18. I was. like, "Oh, she think a 19-year-old can. run for president?". Bro, I would not trust that. No. You. know, um, you don't think you can run. this country? Oh, girl, I can. Harvard. Har be lying to all the other. world leaders. No.

Yeah, we actually. we're not in debt anymore. Honestly, she'll be starting so much drama. She like I might take a random. 19-year-old over the two president. options we have. I would be like, "Give me the money. Give me the money." No, but um what's it. called? So, yeah, these two girls in. class every single day do not stand for. the pledge. And I'm like, come on. Like, stand. It's that hard. Like, I see you. walking in the hallways. So, so, uh, so I know you can't stand. So, yeah. I mean, I I It's. understandable if you can't stand.

People used to get in trouble. I mean, I would hope that would be. understandable. Yeah. Like, so annoying. Duh. Well, duh. What do they do on the 4th of July? They. celebrate that. Yeah. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. They. still do the pledge of allegiance at. school. Yeah. I thought that was like a big thing with. Wait, guys. Try to say the pledge of. allegiance. I bet you can't. I pledge allegiance. Okay. No. Well, y'all go first because. then if y'all get it wrong cuz I say it. every single day. I pledge of allegiance to the flag of. the United States of America to the. republic.

for which it stands. One nation. under God with liberty and justice. SO CLOSE. ONE NATION. ONE NATION under. God. He's not going to get this work. Invisible with liberty and justice for. all. INVISIBLE FOR. NO. NO. NOT THE TEXAS PLEDGE. Definitely invisible. Wait, what is it? I don't feel like it's invisible. Indivisible. Oh, no. We're invisible for sure. Wait, what is it? What' you say? Nothing. No. What's the word? WE'RE AN INVISIBLE NATION. NO. WHAT'S.

THE WORD? One nation under God. Indivisible. Indivisible. What type of word is that? And like we're not. we're not part of like uh Europe. anymore. Like we're or we're not like. we're the United States. We're not like. Texas and Oklahoma. We're. nation under independent. How about. that? Why don't we use that word? Well, no, because that doesn't mean the same. thing. Well, the other one means like. Yeah, THAT'S MY PICKUP IS DIFFERENT THAN. YOU. FIRST OF ALL, I'M REWRITING OUR THEME. SONG. THAT theme song. Yeah. No, that's our theme song. What do.

you mean? But if you ever go to war, it's going TO BE ONE DAY SONG. IT'S A Star Spangled Banner. That's the theme song of America. OH MY GOSH. ARE YOU STUPID? NO. WAIT, WAIT, WAIT. I just realized I'm y'all going to think. I'm caps, but I'm not. I thought the. Star Spangled Banner was an extended. version of the national anthem. God, it's not the one they sing at the Super. Bowl. No. When they go all out. NO, NO, NO. THAT IS BECAUSE THEY SAY.

STAND FOR THE national anthem. Oh my god. It's a kid. No, no, no, no, no. That is That is. crazy. What you think? No, no, you're still confused. No, no. I got this. Do you realize the Star Spangle Banner. is the national anthem? Oh, this is what happens when you don't. finish high school. No, they're right. I'M ASSUMING THAT. THE Star Spangled Banner is our national. anthem. Yeah, that's not our national. We have a short version AND A LONG.

VERSION. OUR NATIONAL ANTHEM is um is what? What. did you just say? What I Yeah, what I just said. Yeah. No, that's the pledge of. allegiance. Oh, yeah. So, the national ANTHEM. OH, THERE'S the distinction. Is And then like what's it called? Um, do you have like like isn't it right? No, cuz I always was confused WHEN THEY. SAID STAND AND WE SING TWO DIFFERENT. SONGS. A GUY WROTE IT ON THE boat before he. died and then they found the paper like. 5 years later. Oh, which song? The Stars Bangled Banner like the No, LOOK IT UP. LOOK IT UP. HARPER, that sounds really smart. I hope.

you're right. It was a poem. Part of it I thought the other part was. maybe that was a woman that made the. flag. I'm thinking. that's Betty Rue Harper. Yeah, I think I'm thinking of the girl. that made the flag or. Betsy Betsy Ross. Yeah, you you're. right. That's actually crazy though. So, I was right. They're not the same thing. They're not an. They are the same thing. Well, no, they're not the same thing. The national anthem and the Star Banner. are the You were leading the You were. leading me down a different path. You. know, there's still two different There's the. pledge of allegiance. Fergie, when she sings the national. anthem is so bad, bro. Yeah.

Actually, like I. I thought cuz never mind. I always. thought it was the same song. We just. one was like the extended version for. like. sing one and say the other. I just. thought there was the short version for. like that when you're you're in school. and then I thought there was like a. longer version for like when they go all. out. That'd be crazy if they made you sing. the national anthem every day at school. instead of the pledge. Wait, do the Texas pledge. What the We're not from Texas. Still from Texas, man. Wait, y'all do the Oklahoma pledge. Did y'all have one? There's no Oklahoma. No, but there's an Oklahoma song. There's an Oklahoma pledge.

I do the Texas pledge. I honor the Texas. flag. I pledge allegiance to the Texas. One state under God, one indivisible. That's a pretty short pledge. WAIT, HOLD UP. WE PLEDGE allegiance to. I pledge allegiance to thee. Texas. One state under God, one and. indivisible. Wait, I do the Oklahoma one. What is it? I've never heard it. Um, Oklahoma. Oklahoma, where the wind comes sweeping. down the plains. With the waving sure. smell sweet when the wind comes right. behind the rain.

I think it's like Oklahoma. We will not. stop for rain, sleep, or snow. What the Something like that. L H O M A. Okay. Heard that song. Guys, can I poke this leaf in my mouth. or in my eye? Yeah, go for it. Wait, hold on. Oh, I'm surprised she's just now thought of. this. Try to grab it. Oh my gosh.

Oh, that looks like it hurt. You got to grab it. Yeah. Okay, retry. What? What do you mean? You just did it. No, I need I should grab it down with. me. If you actually pull it down with your. eyelash, that's insane. OH. OH. OH, SHE GOT IT. OH MY GOD. THAT WAS IN BETWEEN HER EYELASHES. SHE GOT GRIPPER on that thing. That was crazy. And tried it, Kate. Kate's not.

I don't know if Kate's going to be able. to do this. She's not very coordinated. She can't get it over. I know. She. played bench in softball for a reason. Yeah, Cash is going to have to play. bench in pickle ball. We went and played. pickle ball. He's not any good. I'm trying to learn pickle ball. Matt's not very good. Matt's already. went and he's. How far did it go? It went like this. far, right? Yeah. Something like that. We went to. play pickle ball and Matt beat me and. he's flexing that he beat me, but he's literally played before. That. was my first. I played one time before. Yeah. And that's huge, bro. That's huge. At the end at the end, I was getting.

good, but I I'm like learning the rules. I was literally learning the rules and I. was like, I beat you. IT WAS 11 TO THREE. and 9 to3. I didn't know how to I didn't know how. to play, bro. Pickle ball like popped off this year. Oh, bro. My sister plays that all the. time. It's so weird. I could probably beat her. No, Reese is a ultimate person. Also, do. you know. ultimate person? I don't think the. like a superhero. Did you know Drunk Elephant came out. with pickle balls? Really? Yeah. How did you know that? Cuz I'm on top of the transes. On top of the tren.

The what? The train. Yeah. Mhm. Some a lot of people are turning trains. this year. I thought you said train. Trains. Yeah. I didn't know what she was saying. Not going to lie, bro. I got an idea. Oh, boy. OH, BOY. OH, NOBODY WORRIES. HARPER'S GOT an. idea. I'm going to pop. No. Why is it always that? It's always. I'm going to pop something. Now that she tased you, she's ready to. go home.

You should say that for. we've been we've been thinking about. that for all day long. Like. yo, bro, you got to have. What do you mean we you and who? Me and you. I haven't been thinking about it all. day. Barbara, you're going to have to. sit up. I don't think the camera can see. you. Can you see me? They can hear her. That's what counts. Can you see me? This one can now. This is like That's like what the view. is seeing you from that camera. That's. probably what like most images look like. when Harper takes a photo with a group. Honestly, I like this vibe. It's kind of. comfy. Y'all got to stay there for the. rest of the video.

I really like doing it. Um, you want to give it a try? He's lowering that chair. You can't do it in that chair. That. chair will make. No, this this chair is smells like. smoke. It smells like smoke. It smells like smoke and it probably has. some bugs in it. So, I don't think I'll. be. You've been smoking? I don't think I'll be putting my head on. it. And you've been playing with bugs? What you been doing? It's very comfy, right? I like it. It's something. No, it didn't like. Matt looks like he's struggling to stay. up. What? I can stay here as long as I want. Matt's struggling. He's like this. He's like,

you're not going to knock me over. Oh. Oh my gosh. No. That's pretty funny. ENOUGH OF YOUR FORM OF BULLYING. The equivalent to like giving a swirly. Bro, can we just have one piece here? I feel like Harper's like a Chihuahua. You like knock her down and then she. runs back to do it again. Y'all want to see something crazy like.

the craziest dead leg ever? For some reason, I thought your head was. going to fall. I didn't know why. Nope. Process though. You lost. I I I went. I feel like that could be a good back. stretch. It feels so. Well, Matt's back is arching right now. So, what are you saying? Your back is stretching. I'm not arching nothing. I would never. arch my back. Whoever wins. So, let's do how many. people we can do this and whoever wants. Please just do that again.

No, no. First one to 10. Ready? 10. Yeah. First one. Wait, what am I doing? Wait. Show marker. It's a light switch. Ready? Yeah. And we can do this. Wait. Don't grab the back. Don't grab. the back. That thing's about to break. No. Me and Joe already broke it. It's. fine. It holds. No. No. No. Don't grab it. Don't. trust me and Joe. No thanks. Okay. Just don't grab it, though. Yeah. It's too easy. Or. All right. Ready? Three, two, one, go. Done. First of all, I totally beat you. FIRST OF ALL, YOU'RE NOT EVEN DONE. LOOK AT YOU. NEITHER ONE OF Y'ALL finished the. motions. Y'all just did this.

This is what y'all did. All right, fine. Ready? Definitely. You got to finish. You got You got to. follow up. Boom. I want to see this. Dude, get that out of here. This. Three, two, one. What? Ah, you can't see me. No. Wait. Three. Wait, guys. Let's see. how far my back can arch. Child, please. listen. Okay? Enough of your games. All. right? We This is a podcast and not.

going to play these stupid games. All. right? We'll be taking it seriously. Okay. It's time we START TAKING THIS. PODCAST SERIOUSLY. CHILD, PLEASE. CHILD, PLEASE. CHILD, PLEASE. HEY, WAIT. What age is someone considered not. a child? 13. What the. I'm still a child. Wait, FIRST OF ALL, WHY YOU KNOW THAT? I just 13. No, it's 13 is when you become a. teenager. Everything under 13 is. in Jewish culture, once you become 13, you become a man. Really?

What the heck? 13-year-olds are men. Dude, what? You're like a contortionist. She was like, "Oh my gosh.". That's why when Jesus ran off to the. temple steps, nobody knew where he was. because he was 12. So that his mom. thought, "Oh, maybe he's with his dad. because he's kind of becoming a man. He's about to be a man." And then his. dad was like, "Oh, he's 12. He's with. his mom.". He looks so short. Nothing you say like that in that. position, I'm taking seriously. Well, it's true. Imagine like trying to. get Bible. Can you imagine a pastor preaching like.

that? Are you Are you Oh, wait. I was talking. to Cash. Would you ever um be like a. youth leader? Wait, first of all, now he's talking. Would you rather? Would I be a youth leader? Ever. Not rather. No, no, no. I couldn't be a youth. leader. You don't think you could be a kids. worship? Maybe. No. K was like, "Caser, do you want to. be a youth group leader? Look at these. cute like nine-year-olds. Yeah, nine-year-olds. I could do I can't. do like high school. Cash could do high. school. I couldn't do high school. He was I do high school. He was like, I would never do that. Huh? Oh, I do I could do kids if I was a. teacher. WAIT, WAIT. WHY WOULD I DO HIGH? CAN YOU.

SAY I'M NEVER. I would prefer to do kids because A lot. of people teach kids the wrong thing. Yeah. You know, I think. Why in the world would I do high school? Huh? Cuz you could handle high. schoolers. I can't. What do you mean? I can't handle that. You can handle high schoolers. How can I handle them? You can't. You just can't. like handle them? No. Like. not at the youth group, honey. Okay, maybe you shouldn't. Cuz now that. I'm thinking about it, the way you. handle high high schoolers is not okay, BRO. WHEN WE AT THE COURT, CASH CASH BE. GOING IN ON THESE HIGH SCHOOLERS. THE.

OTHER DAY HE GOES, "HOW OLD are you?" They're like 16. He's. like, "Okay.". He's like, "If you were 18, I' I'D FIGHT. YOU RIGHT NOW.". NO. NO. There was. HE WAS LIKE, "HIT ME." THEN I HIT YOU. I'VE PLAYED A LOT OF BASKETBALL AT A LOT. OF COURTS and I've never Now that I'm. thinking about high schoolers get under. your skin real bad. You can you cannot. be around high schoolers. You go TO. JAIL. GO BACK TO JAIL. BACK IN THE. CUFFS. BACK TO THE SLAMMER. I go. right after the dentist cuffs me up. Bro, the dentist going to come get you.

Actually, that's really scary to think. about. Like that's a nightmare you can. put in a kid's head. Dennis coming at you with handcuffs. That's terrifying. I know. I hate that. It is a hiccups is. actually crazy. cuz don't they wear like the white. doctor? No, dude. No way. Yeah. And then they got they got the. light thing on their head and their eyes. are like real big from those goggles. You know what I'm talking about? They're. like, "Oh my god.". Sit like this. Time to get cuffed. Like no. Time to get cuffing season.

It's cuffing season. All the girls. Harper, what would you do if you went to. like your youth group though and like. Cash or Maverick was the youth group. leader? That's crazy. I I legit could be your. youth group leader. That's insane. What do you mean? We went through this. You don't know Jack about the Bible. You. freaking Sorry. You know, I'm sorry. That was rude. First of all, he just doesn't First of. all, all I got You know what he said? He. said, "Bro, I know all the stories like David.

and the Lions did.". Okay, dude. Okay, dude said that. I GOT. WHY DOES NO one give me any grace around. here, man, when I misspeak? Okay. Speak. You didn't miss. I met I met Moses in the lion's den. Yeah. Yeah, that's for sure. Okay. Moses in the lion's den. Do you know that story? Yes. Really? What happens? He gets put in the lion's den and the. lions don't eat him because he believes. in God. They don't eat Moses. Yeah, that's good. Yeah. Hey, why was he thrown Why was he thrown. in the lion's den?

Cuz he believed in Jesus. No. Oops. Well, do you know the story of. Elijah Saccharas and and um Habiscus or. something? Hibiscus. That's a T. Oh, Madashis. MESHACK AND ABENDIGO. BRO, THAT WAS NOT. EVEN CLOSE TO the rap. Hibiscus. Aiscus. ABENDO. AISCUS. HEY, TO BE FAIR. TO BE. FAIR, WHEN I'M READING the Bible, I make.

up those names. Those are way too hard. to read. Some of the names are a little. I'm gonna call THIS ONE ZACH. THAT GUY'S. GONNA BE NAMED ZACK. DEUTERONOMY. It's a dude. I can sing the. whole book of the Bible. So, first uh. for the Old Testament. Um. actually, I don't think you can. I want to hear this. No, this is going to be very. Well, YOU'RE GOING TO GO ALL THE WAY TO. LIKE from Wait, wait, wait. What do you. mean the book of the Bible? Like you're. going to go through all the books. or the Oh, you're going to sing the. books. You going to be like New. Testament, Old Testament, or you going. to sing all the books? Books. Since.

you're going to sing Genesis, Exodus. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Ready? Genesis, Ex Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, Deuteronomy, Joshua, Judges, Ruth, 1 and. 2 Samuel, 1 and 2 Kings, 1 and 2. Coronicles, Ezra, Nehemiah, Esther, Joseph, Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, Songs of. Solomon, Isaiah, Jeremiah, Limitations, Ezekiel, Daniel, Hosea, Joel, Amos, Oadiah, Joseph, Hikana, Habaca,

yeah, Zephaniah, Hagi, Zachchariah, Malachi. Okay. And then now that was the New. Testament. Now this is the. That was the Old Testament. What's What. does the new one start with? Matthew. Matthew. All right. Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, Acts, Romans, 1 and 2 Corinthians, Galatians, Ephesians, Corinthians, Colossians, 1 and 2. Thessalonians, 1 Peter, 2 Peter, Titus, Fims, Hebrews, James, First Timothy, 2. Tim, Timothy, 1, 2, 3, John, Jude,

Revelations. That's great. SO, YOU'RE MORE QUALIFIED THAN THAT. YEAH. WAIT, YOU CAN'T do that. I can't. There's no shot. You clearly can. These are the ones you. can. I would think you can. I can. I mean, you cannot do that. Uh, I can do all the way through the. minor prophets. I don't think I could do. There's no way you can do the whole. book. I can't do the whole New Testament in. order. There's no way I can do the whole. New Testament in order. The way he's singing is just not it. Totally not mine. It wasn't really a song though. I was.

wait I was a beat. Yeah. Yeah. But that that was actually very. impressive. Yeah. Where did you learn that? And uh first joined it, Kate. First grade at church. Oh, I say church, right? First grade church. What are you looking for? What is down there? Oh. Oh, wow. That That's definitely. something. you scared the viewers away. Well, then I'll click on that. ALL RIGHT, GUYS. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR. WATCHING. WE'LL SEE YOU NEXT TIME.

PEACE. Peace out, Broka. [Laughter]. [Music].