Nara Smith EXCLUSIVE: They Call Me a 'Tradwife' But Here’s the Real Story
I would be crying every single day. I. didn't want to leave the house. I didn't. want to interact with anyone because all. the comments and the hate got to me so. bad. South Africanborn model Nara Smith rose. to fame after her cooking videos went. viral. And her fans have been fascinated with. everything from her family life to her. style. People love projecting things. onto me. And because I cook for my. husband, I'm in the kitchen and trapped. and I'm just at home and he's the bread. winner. They use me as this poster child.
of this like very traditional wife. I feel like 18 is very young to get. married. Did you always want to get. married young? I never thought about marriage. I never. thought about longterm. But then when I. met Lucky, it kind of just clicked. What gave you that inner confidence to. be able to say, I know what I want. I. know who I am. The number one health and wellness. podcast. J Shetty. J Shetty. The one, the only J Shetty. For someone who doesn't know your.
content. or may have come across it but doesn't. really know you, how would you explain. or describe what you actually do online? I always find it so interesting when I. get asked that question because to me it. just feels so natural what I do. And I. guess it's just me being in the kitchen. sharing my love for cooking but also. wearing outfits that you probably. typically wouldn't wear in the kitchen. just because I'm a fashion girl at. heart. And when I moved to America, I. didn't really leave the house a lot. because we had kids and then I couldn't. work and all of these things. So, I was.
like, well, if I can cook at home in a. cool outfit, why not? It's sitting in my. closet anyways. So, I think that kind of. sparked the fashion aspect of my. content. And then cooking is just. something I feel like I slipped into. And then also learning a lot about. myself, my health journey that also. inspired the from scratch cooking. I. feel like that's how I build my audience. and people love seeing it and tuning in. It is natural for sure. Yeah. But it's it's so clever and smart and. wonderful at the same time. Like like.
you said, no one's used to seeing. someone cook a meal from scratch. in like a brand new Prada, you know, dress or whatever it may be and you're. like dressed in all white while you're. like. that is risky. The fact that I actually. have never spilled anything on myself. baffles me every No, not even as an outtake. No, not while. cooking, but then I sit down and eat and. all of a sudden I've got stuff on me. It's really I don't know how it happens, but fingers crossed that I'm not jinxing. it right now. You'd be really disappointed watching me.
cook. You know what? I think I'd have a laugh. because watching Lucky cook in the. kitchen is. Oh, yeah. That makes me feel so much better. No, he's terrible. The only thing I he. does know how to make really well is a. steak. So, usually when it comes to like. steak, I'm like, "You do it." Cuz. sometimes I get iffy with it. So, he'll. do that. I'll do all the rest. And he's. a good baker, right? I feel like baking is something that you. could get into actually if you're not. already into it. No, don't. I'm I'm I'm so bad. Like, you just have to level your spoons and.
you're fine. Right. Yeah. I'm not sure I could do any. of that. I'm I'm like a full-on mess. There's a video of me Radhi always like. gets me in the kitchen somehow for for. videos. And there's a video of me peeling an. avocado, which is really the most embarrassing. thing. Wait, what do you mean? How do you peel. it? Well, just watch the video. Okay. It is really embarrassing. It's It's. really bad because I had no idea that. Radi totally set me up, but it's it's. terrible. The reason why I wanted to. have you on the show is I also feel that. as creators,
you get known for a very specific thing. And of course, that's your brand. It's. who you are. It's your business. But. then there's a human behind that. And. there's a human story behind that. And I. think that's what I've always loved. about my show is the ability to get to. know the human behind the brand behind. what's working online behind the. creator. And so I know you grew up in. Germany. I wanted to ask you like what's. a childhood experience that you had that. you feel really defines who you are. today or an experience that stayed with. you? I think growing up with my German.
grandma, she passed years ago, but I. think she shaped so much of what I love. and what I do. So, she's kind of the. reason that I got into cooking and I've. had an interest in that. She was the one. that got me into playing the piano that. I played for 10 years. She's the one. that taught me how to read and now I. can't put down a book and I have never. been able to. Like, my room was full of. books as a child. And I think she's a. person that really shaped me and my. views on the world. And I think that's. something that will always be missed.
with her not being here anymore. And I. wish she could see me now. And I hope. she would be proud, but I think she is. How old were you when you lost her? I'm. not too sure. I was young. I remember. the day she passed. I was actually at. home cuz I wasn't feeling well. And I'm. really surprised my parents let me stay. home, but I think they saw that I. actually wasn't feeling well. And then I. remember getting a call on our house. telephone at the time. And I just I. don't know, my heart dropped, which is. weird because we got calls all the time, but I just knew my grandma passed in. that moment and I don't know how. So I.
answered the call and it was the old age. home that she was in and they were like, "Is your dad home?" And in that moment, I just knew cuz I kind of put two and. two together. And that was a really sad. day. I don't remember exactly how old I. was, but I was definitely in elementary. or starting high school. Yeah. Yeah. And was it something she did or. was it how she lived? I think how she lived like she wasn't. afraid to do things. She was very. independent. She was just so strong. She. was such a strong woman. And I think.
that's what was really inspiring to me. Yeah. I think it's so beautiful. I feel. like there are so many people around us. who've impacted our lives, but they. never said a thing. No, like they didn't tell you how to live. They didn't give you advice. It's not. that they shared some wisdom with you, but you just felt their presence and. their energy and how they carried. themselves. Especially grandparents. I. think Radhi has that same connection. with her grandmother. who's still alive, but she just feels. her. infectious energy when she's around her. And that's something I hope that I will.
have with my children and my grandkids. one day to where I don't have to say a. lot. I can just be me and live. authentically like myself and they'll. take away whatever they need to to live. their lives in the fullest way. Yeah. There's there's you're reminding. me of this beautiful quote from St. Francis who I love and he wrote that you. know wherever you go you should preach. So whenever wherever you travel you. should preach and if necessary open your. mouth. And it's that idea of like we we. actually preach by not preaching. We we.
preach through our character, our. energy, how people feel when they're. around us. And that says so much more. than the words that come out of our. mouth. It does. Yeah. But where did the modeling begin? Because I believe you became a model at. 14. How did you talk to me about that. transition of. Yeah. So that I actually started. Instagram right when it came out. So. right when it came out, I was 14. Well, 13. I lied about my age. Um. Oh, because you had to be 14. I think you had to be 14. I just added. like a year on.
Is that a Germany thing? I don't know what it was. Maybe. I mean, Instagram literally just came out. That's the generation I'm in. So, I. never had Facebook, never had anything. that came pre-Instagram. Instagram was. kind of my first app that I was on and I. just posted my stuff and I wanted to. become a model. I don't know exactly why. or where that came from, but that was. kind of stuck in my head. And then there. was this hashtag hashwe loveyou jeans. that IMG models was doing. So I just. kept hashtagging my pictures. Nothing. really happened. I was just a girl.
trying to make it somehow. And then they. actually one day the president reached. out to me and she wanted digitals and. whatever. So my dad and I went around. the house did the walking video on like. cobblestone. It was so horrible. I don't. know what they saw on me. But then a. week later, I was in Paris signing with. them at 14. And then I I've been with. them ever since. I took a little break. when my first kid was born. But now. we're back and it's great. What gave you the confidence at 13 to.
like take pictures, post them, like. where was that coming from? I think at that age, at least for me, I. had no sense of embarrassment or. humility in a way. I was like, "Yeah, I. look great. I'm tall. I'm whatever.". Like at that age I wasn't really. insecure about anything and I think that. came later with obviously the modeling. industry comes with a lot of your. appearance is basically the most. important thing. So then all of a sudden. you think about all these things and I. think that's where the insecurity came.
in and I was blissfully kind of unaware. of all my flaws I guess at that age. which kind of helped me to get to that. point and then after is kind of when the. insecurity set in. Yeah. It's so interesting, right? Like I. think that age is also getting younger. and younger where insecurity sets in. now. Like if you were the generation. where Instagram was your first app at. 13, when I was 13, I had a brick phone. I love that. So like my Yeah. My life was my parents. got it for me because I used to get a.
bus home from school on my own. So I. could just text my mom or call her and. say, "Hey mom, I'm on the bus." And that. was the reason I had it. And you know, you had to like key in your ringtones. Like there was no, you know, there. wasn't an app. You had to like press the button three. times to get the letter. literally. Yeah. This isn't a. smartphone, right? So it's interesting. to think how 13 for me was phones were. becoming a thing. 13 for you is. Instagram. 13 now. I don't even want to know. That's one of. the things that I actually feel really.
strongly about is protecting my kids. from that world and doing everything in. my power for them to not be involved in. that. in whatever way that is. Like. they're not getting smartphones. I mean, they're too young to even have a phone. right now. They're three and well, baby, and then three and four. So, that's not. something we're even talking about. But. Lucky and I have always said we're never. getting them smartphones. We're going to. get them a phone that they can call us. with and text us with, but also being in. the digital space and knowing what the. internet is like and knowing what the. modeling industry is like, I would never.
ever want to subject my kids to that. So. that's something that I think I'm like. painfully aware of to where I just want. to protect them so much because also I. think I wasn't protected enough when I. was a kid because my parents didn't know. any better. They'd never seen Instagram. before. They'd never heard about. Snapchat. They've never heard about all. these different apps that all of a. sudden started popping up. And as a kid, you're not very at least I wasn't very. forthcoming to my parents about what I. was doing on my phone in my room at. night. And I think those things are just. so important for me to keep my kids away.
from because of how dangerous the. internet can be, especially for young. kids. Yeah. How did your parents feel when you. went to Paris, got signed? Like what was. that like for them? They were really excited. They were so. excited for me because I feel like I. also matured quite quickly to where they. kind of trusted me and what I was doing. and they let me travel by myself and let. me do all these things which now in. hindsight I'm like you guys really you. trusted me a lot but I never misused.
that or gave them a reason to not and I. think that's what was really important. for them in order for me to do what I. wanted to do. They were always so. supportive as long as I kind of put in. the effort to get to where I wanted to. get. And that they still are. They come. and watch the kids if I have to work. They come and help me do something. If I. have to do content, they'll help. Like. they've always been so supportive, which. I'm really grateful for because I know. not everyone has that experience growing. up. Yeah. It's amazing that you were able to.
mature young, but that they were able to. trust you cuz that's an interesting. balance. I felt like when I was young, I. was maturing fast, but my parents, it. took a second for them to kind of like. let go and trust that what I was doing. was right. And so that is wonderful. But. did it ever get unhealthy for you? Like. from a. Yeah. It's never worth it to sacrifice. your health and how you feel for. something because you are going to be. good enough in whatever way you choose. to show up. You do not have to try to.
fit into a mold that someone else is. designing just to be good enough for. them. Because at the end of the day, whenever you've outgrown that mold, you. become useless to them instead of just. starting off as you and them either. accepting it or not. And then you move. on if they don't. And I think that's one. thing that I'm kind of learning the more. I grow up. It's I don't want to fit in. someone else's mold. I'll do whatever I. want to do. If you want to be on this. journey with me, I'd love to have you. If you don't, that is okay and you can.
do whatever you want to do. And I think. I have had so many unhealthy patterns. with eating and my self-worth and how I. look that I just am happy that I've. outgrown that. Yeah, so well said. And for people who. are looking at you and they're like, nar, I want to be a creator. I want to. make stuff on Tik Tok. I want to be on. Instagram. I want to be in fashion. I. want to be a model. Let's look at some. of those lanes right now and break down. your advice for people. If someone right. now is saying, "I want to be a model.". What should they be thinking about? How. should they be approaching that career?
I think figuring out what exactly you. want to do. There's like different. things in modeling. You can be high. fashion, you can be commercial, you. could be runway, like there's so many. different things. So figuring out I. think it's so important to figure out. what you want, what your goals are, and. then seeking that. So if you want to be. a model, maybe posting on social media, reaching out to agencies, sending in. your resume, like really doing things to. get to that goal. obviously feeling and. looking the best to you. So don't try to.
go off and do something that you think. agencies will like. Be authentically. yourself and if you feel like the best. version of yourself, go and reach those. goals. Yeah. And what about from a content. point of view? Like what were you. posting before you became this version. of you online? Like what was your feed? I think it was pretty not not pretty. similar actually. I sprinkled in cooking. videos here and there, but they were. like super simple, like salads and stuff. because I didn't feel that confident. sharing that much of my cooking because.
I was learning and like cooking. anti-inflammatory recipes that aren't. super interesting. So, I sprinkled in. the cooking. I did a lot of morning. routines, like the classic like morning. routines, evening routines, little fit. checks, get dressed with me, I would do. makeup, um tutorials, kind of like a mix. of a lot of things. And then cooking. kind of started taking off. So I went. with that and now I sprinkle in all the. other things here and there. How many videos did you post? Do you. remember before you had a viral moment.
that really made you go, "Oh, wow.". I don't remember the exact amount of. videos, but I do remember the first. video was so random that went viral. It. was me filming Lucky. It was like a. 5-second clip of we came back from. church and Lucky was in his like shirt. and slacks from church and it was like a. random clip of him like cutting an apple. and I said there was like some text. overlay over it being like I don't even. know what the text overlay was and then. I put some like viral song on it and it.
got 30 million views and I'm like I. don't know what's happening but I guess. people are finding my husband hot. It's. great. Um, so that was the first like. viral video and then it like kind of was. just random things. But then the first. cooking viral video was me making bread, butter, and peach jam for my kids from. scratch. And that's actually the first. video I think that the voice was. actually more present cuz my baby was. sleeping next to me. And that kind of. went off and then I didn't really think. of it though. I didn't really tap into. that niche really until a little later.
on like months. I did post consistently. every single day on Tik Tok for like a. solid year. I never took days off. It. was like every day a video would go up. And now I'm a little bit more lenient. with it because it's so much content. And I think people don't understand how. much it takes. Like I'm in the kitchen. for like 5 to 7 hours every day and then. I put my kids to bed and edit for. another 2 hours. Like it does take a lot. of time to do what I do. So I'm trying. to like give myself a little bit more. time off here and there. And now with. all of my other work things going on,
I'm traveling constantly. I'm doing. things. So, one piece of advice actually. that I do have for people is doing. things because you love them, not. because they'll perform well. I think. that there's like a rule that you can. make with yourself of like filming. content that you know is going to. perform well and sprinkling that in. because you want to keep your engagement. up. want to like do that, but then also. not getting lost in that and being like, "Well, I hate doing X, Y, and Z, but I. know it's going to get my views up." And. then losing yourself in that, and then.
losing the passion and love that you. have for creating content. And then. essentially, you're putting yourself in. this box. You're locking yourself in. this box because you think that other. people want you to just stay in there. But it's actually just you doing that. instead of you being like, "Okay, I'll. post content that's going to perform. really well and that I know people will. love. But also, I love filming, I don't. know, cleaning. So, I'm going to post. that as well." Even though it doesn't. perform as well, it fills up my cup. So, I think finding finding the balance of.
posting good performing content and. content that you love. And then. essentially, the content that you love. to create is the content that's going to. go viral at the end of the day. Yeah, that's really good advice. Yeah, I think that's really honest advice as. well because it is that balance. because of the way the algorithm works. and everything and then what you said is. you find that intersection. and you keep looking for it and that's. why I wanted to ask you your strategy. and your time even hearing you're. cooking for 5 to 7 hours, editing for 2 hours a day. I think. that's very real. Yeah. And I wanted people to hear that because.
it wasn't like this was the first thing. you did and it took off. There was loads. of other stuff before it. I've been on social media for 10 plus. years now. So even though the last year. has been so crazy in terms of virality, I've done social media since I've been. 14. So it it took a lot of trial and. error, it's I've done a lot of different. things. I've fashion has been a part of. my content for so long. Like ever since. I've been 14, I started posting outfits. back then. So I think consistency and.
just keeping going and doing what you. love and essentially something is going. to stick at some point and you'll kind. of tap into that and really use that. But then also not to lose the other. parts that you actually love because it. can get so easy being like, "Oh, I'm. going to do this and I'm going to act. crazy like this because I know it's. going to perform, but then losing the. spark and the love for what you do.". Yeah, definitely. And people are going to see that online. People are going to People know when. you're authentic and know when you're. true to yourself and they can tell if.
something gets done for the views or the. clickbait or whatever it is. is like you. want to stay authentically yourself. because you want longevity. You don't. want to be a viral moment that happens. for 6 months and then you're done. There's been so many creators that had. that viral moment, but now they're. nowhere in sight because that that's not. really they haven't really built. something that is sustainable. So, I. would take sustainability and building a. community over going viral and getting. the followers and numbers quickly and.
then just having people that tune in. because they're interested, not because. they actually like love and support you. and want to be part of this little. family you're building. So many people are told when they have a. viral moment or when things happen, you've got 6 months, make the most of. it. And I think so many people have given. that bad advice. I've heard managers, agents, everyone say it to people, hey, you've got 12 months, and after that you're going to be. irrelevant, so just make the most of it. And I think it's in that moment going, well, no, I love this. Like, I'm going. to allow this to pursue my passions. I'm.
not just going to keep doing the same. thing because someone keeps telling me. just do your thing. I'm going to see how. this can build. And you can actually. then have a longer career. Whereas, like. you said, if you just lean into that. fad, then that's going to go away and. it's not sustainable. Yeah. And I think building something on. what you love instead of what's trending. or viral or whatever. And people are. going to stick around for that. There there's people that have been like. big content creators for 20 plus years. now. They're like they're doing great. And I think it's because they love what.
they do. It's because they wake up every single. day and want to do what they do because. they see the fun in it, not because they. had a viral moment and did whatever it. took to get there. And then what? Mhm. you know. Yeah, absolutely. What what's exciting. you right now? Like what you've got so. much going on. Like what about it is. just bringing you joy and bringing you. life. I think being in a position where I feel. like I get to do exactly what I've. always wanted to do. like I get to. travel and do my fashion stuff and be in.
campaigns and do other things that I. can't talk about just yet, but that I. know people have been asking me for for. so long that I can finally dedicate time. to and really get something beautifully. done. So, I think just being in a. position of feeling immense gratitude to. be able to fulfill all of my dreams and. living this like reality that I've. always dreamt about ever since being a. child. And I just feel very privileged. and grateful to be able to do that. Yeah, you deserve it. That's beautiful.
Thank you. I think anyone who's listening right. now, like I'm sure that advice applies. to so many people. in so many different walks of life where. everyone can think of something they. pretended to be or tried to be or wanted. to be because someone else wanted that. How exhausting is that though? So exhausting. It's so exhausting. It's not worth it. No, it's not worth it. But it almost, like you said, I I love the way you. explained it really simply where it was. like, I thought being a model meant. you're beautiful. And I think that's what we all say. I. thought going to a good college meant I.
was successful. I thought getting a good. job out of college meant I was going to. be rich and that meant I was important, right? Whatever it is, we all have our. own formula of what we were told and. what we thought we had to live up to. Like I I genuinely believed that if I. went to a good college and I got a good. degree and I got a good job, then that. would mean my life was on track. And if I didn't do that, then that would. mean my life was not on track. So that. was my version of yours. And I was very. lucky that I started breaking it quite.
early as well. You said it was meeting. Lucky that. started to break that down for you. How. did you guys meet? How did you connect? Yeah, he sent me a DM. We DM'd for a. little bit and then we exchanged phone. numbers and he was the crappiest texter. Like he was so bad at texting to the. point where I just wanted to be done. I'm like, I don't even care about. talking to this guy anymore. And then. one day he said, I'm going on a camping. trip. I won't have service, but when I'm. back, I would love to just hop on a. phone call. And in my mind, I'm like,
okay, sure, whatever. Cuz I would prefer. a phone call anyways. I'm not a great. texter, but I kind of thought that he. was just saying that. But then he got. back from his camping trip and he. actually called me and we were on the. phone for seven hours straight on that. phone call. And I don't know what. happened after that phone call, but it. just felt like I couldn't be without him. anymore. So from that day on, we were on. the phone every single day. And when we. weren't talking, we were just sleeping. on the phone. Like the phone would be. next to me and I'd just be sleeping.
because we also had a time difference. where I lived in Germany and he lived in. LA. So it was a little bit of a. struggle. But we still made it work. every single day. And then 2 weeks after. that initial phone call, I told him I'd. be in Milan cuz I was walking a fashion. show. And he was like, "Me, too. What. fashion show?" And it ended up being the. same one that I was walking that he was. attending. So that was the first time we met in. person. And then that same day he asked. me to be his girlfriend. He met my parents for the first time, asked my dad to marry me when he met him.
the first time. Then I flew to LA, met. his parents. Two days later we were. engaged and then two months after that I. believe we were married. So, wow. It was so crazy, so quick, but so great. And now here we are five years later. That's beautiful. That's amazing. That's. that's a true like rocket Like. no, it truly was. And a lot of people. were were really questioning whether we. were sane and doing it this quick. But I. wouldn't have changed it for the world. It's been great. It doesn't matter how. much I voice those things and try to.
make people understand that I am. actually a full-time working mom that. they just don't want to get it. They use. me as this poster child of this like. very traditional wife and I'm not. We. split chores 50/50. There's things that. Lucky does that I guess traditional men. wouldn't do, like do the dishes or get. the kids dressed or do the hair or. whatever it may be that people don't. associate with a traditional men man. And there's things that I do like having.
a full-time career and having Lucky be. home watching the children while I. travel for 2 weeks, which is I guess not. traditional in their mind. It's odd. I'm. not confined to the kitchen. I I cook. and do things because I love to do it, not because I have to. If I'm tired, I. will go and eat out. If I don't want to. do that, I will go into the kitchen and. make myself a meal. And I think I just. love it so much to where it never feels. like a chore to me. I remember when me and Radhi first met,
she was at college. She was doing her. second degree. and I just left the monastery like 6. months before. And so we literally I saw. her every day until I got a job. And so. I would go to her college. Wait, I love love. We would Yeah. I would go to her. college. I would sit in the like library. and apply for jobs online and fill out. my resume and all that kind of stuff. She'd go to her lectures. Then she'd.
come back. We'd hang out in between, have lunch together. And I did that. every single day. And it was so. beautiful because we've really got to. know each other because we spent so much. normal time together. Like even when we. started hanging out, we barely went out. on a date. Like that was how we dated. and I was hanging out with her friends. They'd come and join us. And it's like. you get such a real perspective of who. that person is as opposed to, oh, I see. you once a week. We dress up for this. date, right? You know, maybe I spend like an hour and. a half, two hours with you. But when.
you're talking to someone for 7 hours a. day or when we're spending like 7 hours. a day together, you get a different. sense of who that person is. And you can. only do that when you're young. Yeah. Like if I was dating now at this age in. my life, I couldn't even spend that much. time with someone. because there's so much going on. Yeah. Also today, like dating nowadays, I feel like is so different cuz a lot of. my friends are dating and they're like, I met this person on Hinge or Tinder and. I never had any of those apps because I. never really thought about it cuz it. also happened so quick. I was 18 at the. time. I got married at 18. So, in my.
mind, I was not really at that point. that they're at now. And I always think. it's so interesting to see people dating. nowadays. It feels almost intimidating. And I'm very lucky I'm not in that. position. It's hard. I couldn't imagine. It's hard. What advice do you have for. your friends? What do they Do they ask. you for advice and thoughts? They. actually don't because I the thing is. with Lucky and I, it went so quick and I. told him I remember when he asked me to. be his girlfriend, I told him, I'm going.
to take this very serious. So, are you. sure you want to ask me this? Because to. me, I never wanted to date just to date. And I think now with all of my friends, they love dating. They love the process. of it. For me personally, I always hated. it because I felt like I had to open up. to all these people and get to know. these people just for it to not work. out. and it felt like a waste of time. for me. So with Lucky, I told him when. it became serious, like I take this very. serious. It's either going to end in.
marriage or we're just going to be done. now because I'm not going to invest my. time in you if that's not the ultimate. goal. And he was like, "Yeah, we're. aligned." And we truly were. So I think. How were you so confident and sure of. that at 18? Like I feel like 18 is very. young to get married in terms of if you. look at trends. Like did you always want. to get married young? Was that always. part of the. No. Which is really odd because I had a. relationship before Lucky and I never. felt that way towards my previous. partner. I I I never thought about.
marriage. I never thought about. long-term. And I think it just was. because I wasn't in love with him and it. wasn't the right person that I felt like. I could spend the rest of my life with. But then when I met Lucky, it kind of. just clicked and I just thought, we're. either going to do this or we're not. And I think I don't know. I feel like. I've always been a little bit more. mature for my age than a person at my. age would be. And I've always wanted. different things in life than other. people. I always wanted to start a. family. I wanted to have a slower life.
I wanted to get married younger. I. wanted to work and build something for. my kids. And I never my priorities were. never in like partying or going out or. dating around or going on a lot of fun. vacations. My priorities were a little. different. And so I think maybe. subconsciously aligned my values and. what I wanted with how I shaped my life. That's so such a conscious way to live. Yeah. Like it's such an intentional way to. live. Like for you to even be able to. communicate to him at 18 and say, "Hey.
dude, if you don't want to be serious. about this, I'm not in like." And also. for him to receive it too, it takes a. lot from him. There's a lot of maturity. on his side too because I think a lot of. people would say, "Yeah, of course." and. then you know leave 6 months later or. whatever it is. But for you to have that. confidence and selfworth. to actually be able to say that I think. a lot of people at 18 struggle. to actually say what they want and need. because they're scared of the guy or the.
girl running off. and so we pretend and we're like, "Oh, you want something casual? Sure, I'll be that casual." Right? Or. like, "Oh, you want something serious? Yeah, I'll pretend to be serious, but 6. months from now I've gone away." So, where do you think that came from? Like, what gave you that inner confidence to. be able to say, "No, I know what I want. I know who I am." Can you reflect for a. second on where you think that. originated from? It probably was my dad. I think he's. always been very supportive in whatever.
I wanted to do. And he's very type A. So, he's from a young age, he told us, "Start saving, get a job, do these. things." And I think he's instilled. these like very strong values in me to. where I knew exactly what I wanted. And. also having finished high school and. being in a place where I kind of had to. figure out what I wanted to do with my. life and then meeting someone and being. like this is going to work out or you're. going to waste my time. I just felt like. I knew what I wanted. And I think.
turning 18 gave me that confidence. I. was like I'm an adult now. I can do. whatever I want and I better do it good. And I think that also gave me that. confidence to where I could make my own. decisions now and I didn't have to rely. on anyone or anything to make those. decisions for me. So as soon as I turned. 18, I was like, "Okay, this is what I. want my life to be. If you want to be a. part of it, great. If you don't, great.". I don't know. I wanted it to serve me. And I wanted a partner to fit into my. life and add to my life and it not feel.
like a compromise because I feel like I. had everything I wanted. I had my. family. I had my friends. I was really. really happy. I had work things that I. wanted to do. I was traveling for work. I was busy. So to me, it felt like if. I'm going to commit to being in a. relationship with a partner, you're. either going to add to my life or you're. not of value to me. Not in a in a. negative way, but more so I don't want. to pour my energy into someone and spend. all of this time with someone that.
ultimately is not going to add anything. to my life. Yeah, it's really smart. I. mean, it makes so much sense. And when. you say it like that, I probably haven't. thought about it like that for a long. time, but as I'm listening to you, I'm. thinking, you're so right. We waste so much time, money, energy on. people that are not going to be in our. life for longer than 6 to 12 months. And maybe they're around for a bit. longer. But I think about it all the. time. the amount of money I wasted on. dates, the amount of energy I wasted.
thinking about whether that person was. going to message me back, all of that. And of course, we all have. to learn and we all have certain things. to go through, but there is a wisdom in. let's be really clear about what we're. both investing here. What was different. about Lucky that you had an experience. before that made you feel so confident. with him? As you said, you didn't really. sense that before. So, you knew that it. was something special, but what was it. about him that you feel now when you're. looking back that really resonated at. that 18-year-old age?
I think it felt like it was two complete. people coming together and forming a. unity. It wasn't like I had everything. figured out and he didn't, or he had. everything figured out and I didn't. I. felt like we were both in places of our. life, him coming out of whatever he was. going through and coming out the other. end and him being in a place to be able. to be in a relationship and me feeling. the same way. And I think that's what. really attracted me to him, him being in.
a good place mentally, physically, emotionally to be able to have a. relationship and also being honest with. me. I think what attracted me to him was. his honesty. Like he would never tell me. something that he wouldn't be able to. do. So when I told him I wanted it to be. serious, I trusted him enough for him to. tell me that's going to work for me or. it's not going to work for me. And I. think that's something I've never had. before because a lot of the guys that I. dated or had been with, they tell me. exactly what I wanted to hear, but I. knew in my heart that that actually.
wasn't the reality and their actions. didn't line up with what they said. So. that was really important to me. And. then also that our values aligned. We. talked about kids and money and family. and our view of life and religion and. all of these big topics I feel like on. our first phone call. So there was never. a part in our journey where anything was. unclear. We knew exactly where we stood. We knew kind of what would be deal. breakers for each of us. And weirdly. enough everything aligned without it.
being hard or difficult or being. conflicting. We wanted to have a lot of. kids together. We wanted to both be. working. We wanted to build something. for our children. We wanted to do all of. these things. And it just aligned so. perfectly. It's remarkable. Like it's it's. beautiful. No, it is. It's such a blessing. And. the truth is even though you were able. to pull it off at such a young age for. people who found valuable relationships, whether they're 18, 28, or 38 or 40,
Yeah. they found it because of the same. reason. Yeah. the values and the vision piece is. at the center of any successful. relationship no matter what age you meet. at. Yeah. So, the fact that you figured it out. young. Yeah. Just means you save time. But the truth. is those are the same things that. everyone else has to be thinking about. Yeah. About the values and vision. We just had. uh Benny and Selena on the podcast to. talking about their relationship. And I. think it was the first time people could. see that their values and the way they.
treat each other. And. it's not who you love, it's how they. love you and how you love them back. And. I think people got to see that. for the first time. Whereas we're so bad. at knowing whether people are good. together. Yeah. Because we base it on such insignificant. information and data that you don't. have. Whereas when a relationship is. based on vision and values, it naturally has a healthier or a more. likelihood of working out. And I think. it's also about compromise. Like even if. your values align or your vision of life.
align, I think marriage you probably. know is always a give and take and a. compromise and a listening to and maybe. shifting not your core beliefs but. shifting the way you want to go about. things. I think marriage is a. collaboration between two people. That's. how I view it. And I think that a lot of. people nowadays it's like, "Oh, he gave. me the ick and I'm just done." or he. didn't do X, Y, and Z, so I'm going to. ghost him. And I think at least in. marriage for me, that's not a thing.
Like, we chose to get married. We chose. to be with each other for better or for. worse. And obviously, there's things. that once you live together, and once. you have your first fight, and once you. figure out things you've never. encountered before, there is going to be. conflict and there is going to be a. difference of opinion. But I think it's. all about how you go about that and how. you resolve that issue with your partner. that makes you have a really strong. bond. And I think Lucky and I, we've. been married for 5 years now. And in the. beginning, obviously, everything was. blissful. We didn't really think about.
things, but then we had our first child. 9 months after being married. And all of. a sudden, everything changed because you. have another human being. You go through. pregnancy, you go through all these. different things. And I think it was. really us learning how to communicate. better, how to be there for each other, how to be less stubborn, how to be more. loving and compassionate. And I think. compassion is such an important and. vital part of at least our marriage. And. I think that's something that we had to. kind of learn to have. Not that we've.
always been compassionate people and. loving people, but when you get hurt or. you have emotions or feel anger or rage. or whatever, it's hard to be. compassionate towards the other person. But we've both learned that even though. we can still have our own emotions. I. can still be angry at Lucky and be. compassionate towards how he's feeling. for that situation and want to find a. resolution, that doesn't mean I can't be. angry or feel my feelings. So, I think. it's all about figuring out how you work. together as a team to really be able to.
have a really strong relationship. despite everything else that goes on. Work, kids, whatever it may be. Yeah. And that's what love is, right? Like I think love is that ability to say. there's space for both of our emotions. Yes. There's space for my anger and your. sadness. Yes. And there's space for compassion at the. same time as me needing distance or. whatever it may be. And that's what love. is. Like it's far more nuanced and. complex than I love you, it doesn't. matter. Which is kind of like, well, that doesn't make sense because Yeah.
Because. cuz you're going to feel resentful. somewhere down the line. And we don't. want that to happen. And I think with. relationships, it's all a give and take. You're always learning. And I think. that's something that I found so. beautiful about marriage is which is. also why it attracted me to being. married is you're in it for better or. for worse. and you really get to make. that commitment to your partner to. really just see them through life and. for them to see you through life and to. really lean on each other. And I think. that's something I wish more people got.
to experience because nowadays. everything moves so quick. Social media. is such a massive thing to where you get. that instant gratification of DMing. someone or being on a dating profile to. where you just swipe and you're done. with that person. So, I think being. really locked in is something that's. really beautiful to me. I think a lot of. people struggle with like when they feel. that people don't love the way they. love, right? And it's like at least what I. found is that most people won't love the. way you love. and that maybe isn't the right thing to.
expect. Like the difference of who they are and. how they operate. It's more about are we. moving in the same direction. but not at the same pace. Yeah. And we might be coming through different. routes. Like I often think about it like. you're both driving to the same place. but you might be coming from different. sides. And so I'm on the phone to Radi saying, "Hey Ri, I'm going to be there in 20. minutes." And she's like, "It's going to. take me like 40 minutes." I'm like, "All. right, I'll wait for you outside in the. car when I get there." Right? And so.
like we're going to the same place, but. we're coming from two different journeys. and what's really needed is the. communication. Hey, I'll wait 20. minutes. I'm going to be 20 minutes. late. And and it's that that you're trying to. monitor. Whereas when we say, "Oh, no. I. want to go with you at the same time. We're going to leave from the same. place. Everything's going to go exactly. planned." It's just very unlikely. Yeah. Right. Does that resonate or. I think I'm a very type A person. So, in. the beginning of our relationship, that. was something I struggled with. I was. like, "Well, why aren't you meeting me. where I'm at? Why aren't you doing X, Y,
and Z? Why aren't you being affectionate. now? Why aren't you picking up the phone. when I need you now?" like there were so. many things that I needed him to be. exactly like me on or vice versa. He was. he didn't understand how I did things. and it led to conflict and sometimes. that is really hard to figure out. because everyone has different love. languages. Everyone has a different. past. Everyone has a different. personality. Like I cannot expect my. partner to do exactly what I need them. to do when I need them to do it. So, I.
think we went to couples therapy for a. while because we didn't really know how. to communicate properly. I always. thought I was a great communicator, but. going to therapy, I realized I really. have a lot to work on and so does he. So, I think as long as you're willing. and open to making changes and listening. and learning and changing, that's what's. important. If you're stubborn and stuck. in your ways, it won't go anywhere. And. I think that's what I like about your. car analogy. As long as you're willing. to pick up the phone and let your.
partner know and you're willing to wait. outside or you're willing to whatever it. may be, then you really get to be with. someone in the best way you can. Like I. want my relationship to be the best. version of it possible. So I will do. anything and everything to learn and. grow and communicate and do all the. things that are necessary for me to get. there. Yeah, I think you hit on something. really important there. It's almost like. when people are like, "What's a green. flag? What should I notice? What should. I look for? It's actually that it's the.
ability that both people have to say, you know what, I could be better. I know I can commun like even just as. you said, like I think everyone who. thinks they're a good communicator can. communicate better. Me included. Like I. same with me before I got married, I thought I was healed and I'd figured. it out. And I got married at 28. Riley. was like 25 and we've been dating since. she was 22. M. and even getting married at 28, I. thought I was pretty, you know, sorted. and and sure there were some things I'd. figured out, but there is so much more.
growth I'd made as a husband than I. would have not made if I was still. single. And it comes back to your point. of compassion. If you feel your partner's judging you. and wants you to grow because they think. you should be better, that doesn't. inspire you. But when your partner's. willing to wait. and let you work through your stuff and. let you grow in your own time at your. own pace, that compassion is what. inspires you and makes you enthusiastic. I think that's the best part about. marriage, at least mine, is having a.
best friend that will push me to be. better. Like he's never going to sit. there and be like, "You're doing great, honey." If we both know I'm not. He's going to encourage me and really. help me to get to a good point, but it. never comes from like judgment or anger. It always feels like a nudge of being. like, "Hey honey, how can I help you to. reach your full potential? How can I. help you do X, Y, and Z?" And I think. being married actually was like looking. into the mirror cuz all of a sudden you. have this person that you're like, "Oh, you're not a great communicator. You're.
not doing X, Y, and Z. You're not doing. all of these things." And it's easy for. you to blame someone else because you. think that you're better than them in. certain ways. Like I thought I was a. better communicator than Lucky. I. thought I was better at doing certain. things, but then when you actually truly. sit down with that person and they're. like, "Well, actually, you're not that. great at communicating because you. didn't communicate then and there and do. this." And I'm like, "Oh, it's actually. like looking into a mirror and actually. being able to self-reflect on all the. work that maybe you should be doing to.
have a really successful relationship.". Yeah, it's it's so well said. I'm just. I'm just blown away. I'm like, I can't. believe like cuz How old are you now? I'm 23. Oh my gosh. You're like I feel like I'm. talking to like an old soul in the best. way in in the most beautiful way. And. and I can so sense that it's so genuine. and real for you. Like as I'm hearing. you talk, I I feel it like it's real, you know? And I think it's important for people to. know that because.
I I can tell that it's it's coded into. your soul of who you are, of how you've. been figuring life out. And it's it's. beautiful when someone can figure it out. earlier. and and be so conscious and honest about. the realities of what's going on. You. were just saying there that obviously 9. months after you got married, you had a. had your first baby. Yeah. I can't imagine how quick this has moved. and you're like having a child too. Like. did you always want to be a young mom? Like was that always the goal? No. Okay. So that was. I never I love children now, but when I.
was younger, I never particularly cared. to be around children just because it. never felt like something that I was. interested in. And then when I met Lucky. again, that's when everything clicked. And then I remembered my dad telling me. growing up, he would always tell me, "I. wish I would have had you guys earlier. I wish one thing I not regret, but one. thing I wish I could do differently is. have you guys 20 years prior and not. have you when I'm almost 50 and trying.
to chase toddlers around. That's not. something that he really enjoyed. So to. me, I kind of took that to heart when I. met Lucky and I knew where we were. heading and I knew what our life would. be like. I wanted to have kids young. because when I'm 40, they're out the. house. So to me, just raising them while. I'm also figuring out my life is kind of. beautiful to me. I like having them come. along my journey and learning with me. and growing with me and me being able to.
relate to them a little better when. they're older because there won't be. that big of an age gap between us to. where it feels kind of harder to connect. with them. And I don't know, there's. never a right time to have kids, at. least for me. And I always hear parents. asking, "When should we have kids? When. is the ideal time?" And to me, there. isn't because you're either too young. and you want to go to college or then. you're done with college and you want to. start working. And then when you're. working and you don't want to take time. off because you just started this job,
but then I don't know 5 10 years down. the line you're a senior in this company. and you're so busy and making so much. money and then that's an inconvenient. time. So like when is the right time? To. me there wasn't. And I just loved having. them so young. And is it hard? Sure. But. is it so rewarding at the same time? It. truly is for me. Every time someone asks me, "When's the. right time to get married?" or "When's. the right time to have kids,". my response is always, "It's the wrong.
question.". The right question is, "Do I know how my. life will change?" Oh, because really what you should be asking. is, am I aware. of what this is going to require of me, right? Like becoming married requires. something different of you. It does. Having a child requires something. different of you. And it's like, do am I aware of that? That's a fair. And am I and I'm willing to walk into. that? Now, I'm not saying you could ever. know everything about how different your. life is going to be. You won't.
But there's a sense of recognizing this. is going to change my life. Yeah. It becomes about an external thing that. doesn't mean you're internally open or. ready. And when we're making decisions. based on perfect timing, like you said, there is never a perfect time. There. there truly isn't. Like me and Radi have. been together for 12 years. We've been. married for nine. We don't have children. yet. And it's not because we don't want. to. I think we do one day. But this.
stage of our life just it's been so much. based on like personal realization. especially for Radhi like when we. decided to get married the deal was we. were going to live five minutes away. from her mom's house. then my career changed and I got this. amazing offer to move to New York and. now we live in LA and so Radi's had to. like go on this crazy journey that's a. lot. and it's a lot and so we've had to like. really learn to like understand what. that means for us put our roots down the. first few years of our marriage Radi. would go back to London a lot more. because she missed home Like there was.
just so much to navigate and like we. didn't feel that we wanted to invite. kids into that uncertainty that we had. That was a personal choice. That's not. the right or wrong answer. It's just. what was right for us. And I think it's. so interesting because yeah, I think. when you make it about the right time. and you make it about an age. like, oh, you had kids early or late. puts parameters on things that are so. restricting. And I think that's another. thing when people hear that I have three. kids at 23. and I had my first at a few weeks after.
I turned 19. They always freak out and. they tell me, "Why aren't you in the. clubs? Why aren't you doing this? Why. aren't you doing that?" And I feel like. they're projecting how they want their. life to be on to me. That's one thing I. really struggled with in the beginning, even doing social media with all these. opinions of people having opinions on me. getting married young and having. children young and them not. understanding that that is a choice I. made for my life. That doesn't mean that. that's the right choice for you. It. doesn't mean that your choices are right.
for me. And I think everyone is on their. individual journey. Like you were. saying, you guys weren't ready to really. have your life change because your life. does change. And I think if you're ready. to have that change, great. If you're. not, it's just not the right time for. you. And I think judging someone based. on their timing of having kids or timing. of getting married or whatever it may be. is such an odd concept to me. And I. never truly thought about that. maybe. Lucky and I are doing it really early or. whatever until I had people's opinions. on it. My dad was stoked. He was like,
"This is great. You're going to be a. young mom." But then hearing other. people's opinions, it never even crossed. my mind before that that this might be. such an odd thing to do at 18. And now, I mean, I wouldn't take it back. for the world. I think it was the best. decision we could have made for us. because even though it is hard and it. changed our life, we found so much joy in it and we find. so much joy in it and we really get to. grow and learn. You learn so much from. having children and whether that's.
patience or understanding or whatever it. is, I think I'm at the perfect time in. my life to receive all of those lessons. from my kids and pour back into them. Yeah. I think you're at a really. interesting intersection. Yeah. And and again, by the way, these. are all societal things. These are not. like they're not real. And I always like. to remind people that. anything that we think is real today is. just something society repeated for long. enough that it's become normal. Like. when we say the word normal, it just. means it's happened in society for a.
long period of time. And that why that's. why things get normalized. And so when. people say, "Oh, you're you got married. early, you had kids early, that's very. traditional. That's a societal take on. your life. I didn't even know it was because the. other day someone brought it up to me. and they were like, "You have a very. traditional way of life." I'm like, "What do you mean?" Like, "We split. chores. I work. I My husband works. We. have children. We split everything. Like, I cook because I love to, not.
because I have to. Lucky cleans." Like, there was nothing traditional. And then. they were like, "Well, you had kids at. 19 and you got married at 18. And I was. like, "And?" And and they were like, "That's traditional?" And I'm like, "Oh, I I I guess that's traditional then." It. never even crossed my mind because I've. always been such a believer in having. people make their own choices and never. judging someone else based on how they. choose to live their life and much. rather celebrating them. How cool is it. seeing someone else be 35 and crushing.
life and traveling the world by. themselves, not having a care in the. world? I love seeing that. whereas I. also love seeing moms that are 18 and. have a child and are doing life and I I. love seeing that. So I think I've always. just loved celebrating people at where. they're at that it was such a foreign. concept to me that people would have a. negative opinion on me choosing to start. my life in that way early on. Totally. And that's why you're at that. interesting intersection as I was saying. because that's what I was about to say.
like you're a career person. You have a. you have a booming career. You're a. model. you're doing online and you're a. mom and you love cooking for them. And. it's really funny because we me and. Radhi in one sense we got married early. and now we're having kids late and so. it's like you know you could whenever. you look at things in any order it's. like well wait a minute no to me we're. on time. Yeah. To me you're on time. No, I love that. Right. Because it's like you're on time. because that's the time that made sense.
for you. And I wanted to ask you about. that like in the sense of and I love I. love your answer to how how you see the. time and and the early and late. but I think there's right now there's. such a big conversation around gender. roles. and around expectations and by the way. me and Radi get the same thing that you. guys get. So people always say to me, you're so lucky you got a traditional. wife and you're so lucky that you got a. wife who loves and I'm like Ravi loves. cooking, right? Like it's she doesn't cook because it's.
a woman's role by based on tradition. She cooks cuz she loves cooking and I. don't cook cuz I'm terrible at it. And. if I love cooking, I would cook. And by. the way, Radhi works. She's, you know, she's got an incredible cookbook. She's. a New York Times bestselling author. She's like creating all this amazing. content. like Radi's got an amazing. business of her own. It's not even. divided that way. But it's interesting. how these perceptions have settled into. society. You challenge them because of. what you just said. How do you encourage.
people to like think about that? Like. how to get out of that kind of. expectation and role and kind of find. your own values in time. I feel like that's something I sometimes. struggle with with my online presence. It's people love projecting things onto. me and kind of how I live my life just. because I cook for my husband because. it's my love language and I love. cooking. They project onto it that I'm. in the kitchen and trapped and I'm just. at home and he's the bread winner and.
all of these things. And I'm like, "No, I work. I'm very busy. I travel almost. every week. I have kids that I raise. I. love being in the kitchen because it's a. passion of mine, not because I have to. And sometimes I feel like this is where. social media gets tricky for me. personally, is it doesn't matter how. much I voice those things and try to. make people understand that I am. actually a full-time working mom that. they just don't want to get it. They use. me as this poster child of this like.
very traditional wife, and I'm not. There's nothing truly traditional about. us as a couple, apart from maybe that we. chose to have kids young and get married. young, but apart from that, we split. chores 50/50. There's things that Lucky. does that I guess traditional men. wouldn't do, like do the dishes or get. the kids dressed or do the hair or. whatever it may be that people don't. associate with a traditional men man. And there's things that I do like having. a full-time career and having Lucky be.
home watching the children while I. travel for 2 weeks, which is, I guess, not traditional in their mind. It's odd. And I feel like people see that side of. my life and I voice that side of my. life, but they still don't want to. accept it. So, I've just kind of learned. to going to do me. And whoever resonates. with that, great. If they don't, then. there's nothing really I can I can do to. change their minds. Yeah. Yeah. And that's a really hard. thing to grapple with, right? It's like, yeah, I remember when. when me and Radi first used to create.
content together, a lot of people would in the comments. like we'd literally be talking about an. issue we had or an argument we had and. talking about how we'd try to figure it. out. And there were some interviews we. did where I didn't even know Riley was. dealing with something and she'd break. down in the interview. and I'd be like, "Oh my gosh." Like I'd. like, "What's going on?" And we'd talk. about it. and we'd still get comments where people. would be like, "Oh, they just always. project themselves as perfect." and. happy and I'm like trust me that is the. last thing I've wanted to do like the. last thing I've ever wanted to do is. present myself as perfect my marriage is.
perfect or anything as because really. what I'm trying to share is hey this is. what I got wrong like I wrote a book. about love and none of it is based on. what I got right it's all based on what. I got wrong and what I learned through. meeting people and but it's interesting. how not everyone hears that because the. noise in our mind of what someone is or. what they look like kind of overshadows. that, if that makes sense. I don't think they want to hear it. And. I think that's what I've learned with. being on social media and being so.
controversial, I guess, is people don't. want to hear it. They don't want to. change their opinion, they don't want to. see you differently. It's like once. they've made up their mind about you or. have read something, it's also easy on. social media, you read a comment or a. headline and you believe it. Like. there's so many things in the news or. whatever it may be that you read the. headline and you believe it and then you. actually like Google and do your. research and it couldn't be further from. the truth. Also nowadays society they. love drama. They love negativity. They.
feed off of fights and opinions and. online situations that cause conflict. And I think that's what people love. projecting onto me. They love that I'm. so controversial and they can kind of. say whatever. And in the beginning it. really used to bother me. I'd used to. cry at home and tell Lucky like, "I. don't understand why they're saying all. these things. None of this is true." And. then I would make a post that's like. very subtle, I guess, and I would say in. the voiceover like, "I'm not X, Y, and. Z. I'm actually a working mom. I. actually don't believe in in these.
things." And then all the comments would. be like, "She's lying. She's gaslighting. us. She's" and I'm like, I I I literally. cannot win. And I think that's what I've. learned. Like people don't want to hear. the truth. They don't care for the. truth. They care about what they want to. hear and what serves them. So the less I. say kind of the better. because it it preserves my energy. There's no point in me saying something. that someone doesn't even want to hear. Yeah. And it's not the majority, it's. the minority. It's like. but that's what your brain picks up. It. could be you could get 50 comments of.
people that love you and then that one. comment that's just so mean and nasty. and that's what you think about for the. rest of the day. And I think that's also. why I don't, you saw me walk in with two. phones. I have a social media phone and. a personal phone. My social media phone, I post. I literally post my thing, maybe. read a few comments cuz I do love. interacting with my community so much. But then that phone is gone. I don't. read my comments. I don't really scroll. on social media. I don't really consume. media. And then my personal phone is for.
everyone that actually knows me and can. have an opinion about my life. And. that's the phone I care about. If anyone. on that phone texts me and has an issue. with me or thinks something, that's when. I'll actually sit down and think about. it. The other phone, I couldn't care. less. You don't know me well enough for. me to care about your opinion at this. point. That's a really smart way of separating. the two because when your mind can't. separate the two, you have to have. physically do it. Yeah. You actually have to have two. separate. because it got it got so bad after I had. like towards the end of my pregnancy.
with my third. I just had whimsy. But. that's kind of when everything picked up. and people had all of these opinions and. I just remember how badly I was. struggling reading all of these. comments. I would be crying every single. day. I would tell Lucky like I didn't. know what to do. I didn't want to leave. the house. I didn't want to interact. with anyone because all the comments and. the hate got to me so bad, especially. being in the last little stretch of my. pregnancy and then with all the. postpartum hormones. And I just realized. that if I keep reading these comments, I.
won't be happy ever again. And it also. felt weird now in hindsight looking. back. Why am I giving them the power to. make me feel some sort of way about. myself even though that's nowhere near. to what my reality is? And I think sometimes the lines of. social media and reality can get blurred. to where I am not that. So why would I. even entertain that enough for me to go. home and cry? Yeah. I'm so sorry to hear that. I can't. imagine like.
being pregnant, the hormones, like. taking care of kids, figuring out, you. know, it's like it's a lot though. It's. a lot. It's a lot to carry. And it's um. it's so bizarre to me that someone who's. doing what you do can be controversial. today. Like it's so bizarre. Like it. goes totally over my head because I'm. like, wait a minute. Like how is this it. could be anything. How is this any like you know? It's it's. it's so funny how something that's so. fun and expressive and what what to me. comes across as artistic and clever can. be anything. I don't even know how you.
misconstrue it. Like I I can't even wrap. my head around that. I don't know. But I think that's also. where I struggled cuz I was like, I'm. just doing this for fun. I just love. cooking. I love being in the kitchen. My. kids need to eat. My husband wants. something specific that I can just film. me making. And it just came from such a. loving and fun place that then I think. it hit me harder when people had all. these negative opinions on it because I. just felt like I was sticking to myself. I wasn't like on the internet slagging.
anyone off or doing anything. controversial, at least in my opinion. And then seeing. those comments, I was just very. takenback and confused by it. But now. I've kind of moved past that and really. figured out how to manage my reality and. my work in a better way. Yeah, definitely. I I I love the way. you've split that up and I think that's. such great advice for anyone who's. online or creating and even in life. Yeah. I think, you know, even if you're not a. creator and you're listening to what Nar. is saying right now,
there's such a reality in being able to. separate and say, "These people really. know me. They've lived life with me. And by the. way, they're honest with me. It's not. like agree with me. But at the same time, there's a group of. people here. Maybe it's yours. Maybe it's. whatever it may be who don't really know. you and they also don't know what you're. going through. I think something you've. done so beautifully is you've spoken so. openly about your eczema journey. You've. even shared imagery and like. when I saw you do that, I thought, "Wow, this requires so much vulnerability,
requires so much courage. It requires so. much strength. to to see someone like yourself who is. known for fashion and modeling and and. all of that to actually come out and. share that. Walk us through why it was. so important for you to share that and. also what was the Yeah. What made you do. that? I think by nature I'm a very private. person. So I think with even with the. content I put out it feels very safe to. me because even though I'm showing parts. of my life, I'm not giving everything. away. And I think sometimes I feel like.
there's so many young girls out there or. girls or boys or whoever actually that. watch my content and think I'm perfect. I'm not perfect. I'm nowhere near. perfect. No one is. No one is perfect. regardless of how high of a pedestal we. put people on. And I think one of the. things that I struggle with on a. day-to-day basis is my eczema and my. lupus. and I really struggle sometimes. getting out of bed or looking. presentable or feeling confident when my.
face is flaring up or I'm losing my hair. in chunks or whatever it may be. So, I. kind of got to a point that I just felt. like I had to share that with people to. help anyone go through it because I. think a lot of people put me on this. pedestal of me being perfect and I just. wanted people to realize that everyone. goes through things. Everyone has things. that they deal with maybe behind closed. doors. And if there's even just one. person that could feel a little bit more. confident to deal with their flare up or.
to feel seen or to feel understood or to. feel less lonely, that's what I want to. use my platform for. And the amount of. people, especially younger girls, that. would DM me their pictures of their. eczema or DM me how they felt or the. fact that they couldn't believe that I. would post these images online because. they can't even leave the house feeling. the way they feel. It just made me feel. like I actually did something to help. someone. And that's always been. something that's been really, really,
really important to me. Yeah. It's it's so beautiful to see you. use your platform for that. I can't. imagine how much that means to those. young girls. I I growing up had really. bad eczema and so remember what it was. like. And it took a long time for my. parents. We tried out everything. possible under the sun and. you know it will come back and go away. and and you know so I can't imagine how. much strength they feel knowing that. someone like yourself that they look up. to and admire and you know that they. follow is being able to share that.
journey with them. And that's also what. started, as you were saying earlier, what started the from scratch food, right? Like that's connected. Can you. walk us through that? A lot of people think it's a gimmick and. I I get it. Like I'm not going to be in. the kitchen every day making bubble gum, but those are like the fun things to me. But initially where my cooking kind of. came from is after my son was born, my. eczema started flaring up tfold again. And it was really, really bad. And it. just kept getting progressively worse. And then when he was around two, I just.
remember I had this insane flare up all. over my body. I could barely get out of. bed. I was it was horrible. And I just. remember feeling so helpless and so sad. And I didn't know what to do. So I did. so much research on food and how it. impacts your body and all these things. I would spend countless hours browsing. social media, reading books, doing all. these things to figure out how to heal. myself. And I think a huge part of my. eczema was that I was eating all the.
processed food. Not all of it, but I. feel like by default when you go to a. grocery store, you buy bread because you. think it's bread, but then you never. check the ingredients for it to be 30. different ingredients or you I don't. know, you buy the most random things. thinking that there shouldn't be a lot. of stuff in there. And the more I kind. of checked the ingredients on things, I. realized that I was actually not eating. good food. And also raising kids, it was. really important for me for them to have. a really good diet because growing up in. Germany, food is so different over.
there. I always grew up with my dad. going to the store every day, cooking. fresh food. We never had processed food. It was never the way it is in America. So then I kind of shifted my whole. eating and I went on an. anti-inflammatory diet and really made. sure that I was eating right. And then. that kind of morphed into me making more. things because a lot of the. anti-inflammatory stuff you couldn't. just find on shelves. So, I was like, I'll just make my own waffles with. cassava flour and coconut milk and all. these different things. And then that. kind of just evolved and evolved. And.
then I was like, I can make bread. I can. make sourdough. I can make I don't know, cheese, whatever it may be. It kind of. just turned into a passion of mine to do. that. And I just realized it can be more. cost effective. Not everything, but a. lot of things are more cost effective if. you make them yourself. It's you know. exactly what goes into your food and you. can kind of customize it the way that. you want it. So, if you want your bread. to be saltier, put more salt in or. whatever it may be, you can kind of do. And I think my love for cooking played.
into that. And then I just spend so much. time in the kitchen developing recipes. and cooking and really just having fun. with that. And then that's where the. content kind of came in and people it. kind of divided the internet a little to. where people either loved it or hated. it. And that's kind of what kickstarted. my whole content. But also, I think. growing up with my German grandma, she. made so many things from scratch. And I. think the older generations do that. I never people are always so shocked.
that I'm doing it and they've never seen. it before. And then there's people that. really slate me on the internet for. being inauthentic and that this has been. done before. And I've obviously it's. been done before. Where do you think. Where do you think all of our food used. to come from? Like I'm so. That's so random. No, it's so random. So, I just I love. celebrating that as well. And every time. I bake bread or do something that. reminds me of my grandma, that's. something that I really do cherish. So, that's kind of where it all started, my. health playing into that. And then me.
just kind of recording what I would. naturally do. And then sometimes I'd. have fun with it and put a fun voice. over with it or like dramaticize things. just a little bit or make a recipe. that's a little quirkier like making. bubble gum, which is so easy and fun to. make. So, I think my reality and then. playing into it a little was what really. formed my content. And that is the food you're eating and. the kids are eating. Exactly. Yeah. I was like, it's Yeah. It's not. just for the content. That's what.
they're eating that day. No, we don't we don't usually buy bread. We don't usually do all these things. Obviously, I love eating out sometimes. I'm also just a mom. Cool. I love trying new restaurants. So, it is. kind of that duality of when we're at. home, I try to make as many things as I. can myself and when we're traveling or. out, I'll do whatever it takes to do. that. Sometimes I love a good. restaurant. Sometimes I'll much rather. cook at home. So, I think that's another. big thing. Like, I love doing both and. I'm not confined to the kitchen. I I.
cook and do things because I love to do. it, not because I have to. If I'm tired, I will go and eat out. If I don't want. to do that, I will go into the kitchen. and make myself a meal. And I think I. just love it so much to where it never. feels like a chore to me. Do you remember the moment you nailed. like you figured it out where you were. like, I'm going to wear this. I'm going. to cook this. And the voice like because. when I when I first watched you and I. was like. the voice was different. The voice I was like this is amazing. I. was like.
I I just love creativity. Like I get a. real like kick out of it. like seeing. someone. The point is you're playing. into the joke like it's part of the you. know you're very consciously doing it. So the voice actually originated from I. love ASMR. Mhm. It I listen to it every night before I. go to bed. I even like the ASMR where. people like eat food and it's like. slurpy sounds. That's whatever. Um so I love ASMR. I. also the voice originated from me. actually having to be quiet because my.
kid fell asleep like right next to me. and I had to be so quiet talking to. where that kind of developed and then. people were like we love the ASMR I like. put it on like people literally put on. my videos for their children to go to. bed too and that is something that was. really fun to me. So the voice kind of. came and played a role in it and it was. never conscious. I was like, I literally. just have to be quiet cuz my kid's. sleeping next to me. I I spend an hour. putting them down. I'm not going to have.
them wake up, but I do need to get this. content up. So, that's where the voice. came from. Wow, that's such a cool story. That's. great. And then the outfits. I just love. dressing up. I remember when I started. dating Lucky, I told him, "I will never. wear a dress ever." And he was like, "Just try it." And I was like, "No." But. then I was pregnant with my third and. all that was fitting in the Texas heat. was a dress. So then that kind of. evolved in my content as well to where I. kind of got known for my fashion and the. dresses that I wore. And then that kind.
of evolved more and more where Chanel. actually send me a look that they would. debut on the runway months later and. they'd never done that with anyone ever. before and that felt like such a. privilege. And then fashion obviously. has been a part of my life for so long. So that just became like a fun outlet. for me. I'm like if I'm not going to. leave the house in these outfits, I will. wear them in my kitchen. So that's where. that came from. And then what else was. there? That's kind of those are the. pillars of kind of what I do. Yeah, we talked about the cooking, the. fashion, and the voice. I think it just like evolved with time.
It was never like a conscious thing that. I sat down and I was like, I'm going to. speak like this to do this. I'm going to. wear this to do that. I'm going to do. this because I want a reaction. It was. never premeditated or thought out or. whatever it is. It just kind of evolved. And then sometimes I'm like, "Yeah, it. would be fun wearing a yellow outfit to. make Capri Sun because I want to." It's. just I'm just having fun expressing. myself and if people want to tune in, it's great. Yeah. I I I love people knowing that.
99% of creators when they start. something, it was never that thought. through. And that's what made it so. beautiful. Like I remember if you look. at my first videos I ever created, I'm in these really beautiful scenic. locations in London. But the truth is me. and my friend were just walking around. trying to find out where security. wasn't, right? So we had no permits. We had no. booking. We had no money to like say, "Oh, we're going to." So we would just. walk around London early in the morning. and try and figure out where security. wasn't. And we'd find these spots where.
you'd get like London Bridge in the. background or St. Paul's Cathedral in. the background or all these beautiful. iconic locations because I like the look. of them. and we would just find it. The my. earliest mic was literally a backpack. with a mic stuck into it to hold it up. because we didn't have a mic stand. And. in the first videos you see my hair is. like flying all over the place and. everyone be like, "Why has you got a. wind machine?" No, it was cold. I was in. London and my hair was just moving. and like it just looked really those.
early videos at that time. I mean, now. they'd be out of date, but if you looked. at them like 10 years ago when I nine. years ago when I first started creating. content, these videos went super viral, but it was like I didn't plan any of. that. That was just what happened. And. obviously what I said was planned or. thought through, but all these little. things that people would notice, it was. like we just got lucky. Like there was a. lot of it that was just, you know, that's how I feel sometimes. People are. like, I can't believe your outfit.
matches this. And I'm like, I didn't. even realize either. Or people are like, I can't believe you've never spilled. anything on yourself. I'm like, oh. Or. they're like, wearing white to cook. pasta sauce is brave. And that doesn't. even cross my mind. Or all these like. random little things that people pick up. on, you don't really do consciously. People always tell me, "She has a full. production team and a nanny and staff at. home and a cleaning crew." And I'm like, "It's literally me, my iPhone, a. tripod." Sometimes Ly's like, "Do you. want help filming?" And I'm like, "No, cuz it needs to be like a certain I'm.
like very type A." So I'm like, "No, no, no. It's me and my tripod. It's okay.". And then he does cleanup. Bless his. heart. Because at the end of my videos, there's like a pile of dishes. But. people always assume these things and. they're like, "She has a nanny." No, we. don't. Lucky and I tag team and when I'm. filming, he's with the children. When he. has to travel for work, I'm with the. kids. And now it's at a point where we. should be looking at getting help. because it's getting quite a lot and we. don't have family that live by. But all.
these assumptions based on a piece of. content that 99% is just coincidence has. always been really baffling to me. I think it's just so hard for people to. imagine. Yeah. Like how can someone be a mom, cook every day from scratch, look great, like you know, like have all your. aesthetic down, like it's so hard. because so many people are just like. trying to like get by. But you've made it something that's fun. for you and enthuses you and energizes.
you. Like it's it's not something and. you've taken something that you are. doing every day anyway. Yes. For the kids because you want to cook. for them and made it something fun. And. I think about it like my mom, I've been. talking about this a lot lately because. I've been reflecting on just like how. amazing my mom is. And it's like my mom cooked me and my. sister a fresh breakfast, a fresh lunch, and a fresh dinner. every day. She was the bread winner of. the family. She dropped us to school, picked us up until I was old enough to. do it myself.
She helped me with my homework. She. helped my sister with her homework. My. mom just didn't film it if social media. was a thing. Could you imagine? And my mom could have filmed it cuz she. was doing all of that. Like she. literally did all of that. Now, she. didn't do it in Chanel, but but uh but. but she did all of that. And even now, I. look back and I think, "Mom, how did you. do it?" And I think I look at you and I. think it's amazing, Nara. Like, it's. really amazing that you're able to And. it's kudos to you. Like, you're the one. working hard. You're the one figuring it.
out. You and Lucky are the ones. splitting it up. But it's admirable to. see you're like working hard. You're. taking care of your kids how you want. to. You're cooking how you want to. You're dealing with your own personal. health and everything else that comes. with it. And I'm sure it's not easy. No. Uh, you know, it doesn't look Yeah, it's. not easy. No, it's it's not easy, but I'm. privileged to be able to do what I do. I. feel so grateful that I get to do it and. have the flexibility of being at home. with the kids and splitting my time with. Lucky. I feel grateful that his job. allows that, too. So, I think we've.
created our our little daily routines. that really help and we just love living. life like this. And I know it doesn't. work for everyone. And I I always think. it's such an interesting thing when. people try to knock me down just because. their life looks different. I understand. our life look different. I'm not. expecting you to do what I'm needing to. do. I'm just putting out content. And if. you feel some type of way about it, you. can also just keep scrolling. Like I'm. not forcing it down your throat. If you.
want to tune in, great. And take away. whatever you want to take away from it, great. Like, I've had moms be like, "I'm. not cooking like you, but I made my kid. bread yesterday and it was amazing." And. that always makes me smile. I'm like, "You don't have to do it all. I don't do. it all.". That's the thing. Like, people think I'm. this perfect person, and I'm not. I have. a husband that's very involved. I have. very like good structure. On some days, I I can't get out of bed because my. lupus is flaring up and I just can't do. that. So, I think just taking my content.
with whatever you want to take from it. and just enjoying it. Yeah. And if I'm honest, I see so many. people and there's one quote that I love. from Gary Vee where he talks about how. hate is loud. Yeah. And it's like I always remind myself. that it's like. people who love you are just quieter. Like they'll like something, they won't. say anything. No, they won't. Right. And and yours is different. I. mean there's so many wonderful comments. So whenever I'm on looking at your. stuff, it's I see so many people being. like I only see the hate comments. I'm.
always like, "Ugh, okay, time to get. off." After like 5 minutes, I'm like, "Oh, no. Okay, I have to be done now.". And I think we're all like that cuz. we're all wired that way. And I'm here. to remind you and just say when I look. at it, I see so many people being. inspired like, "I just tried that. recipe. Oh, I love that look." Like, "Oh, I'm going to try this for my kids.". Or like, "Oh, that was" and what you. just said, like, "My kids fall asleep to. this." Sure. And I think the beauty is. that I don't think this, first of all, I. I think you're hilarious and really. talented. I don't think you're saying. that, at least from my perspective, not.
saying that. anyone should do what you're doing. at all. Like I don't you're not coming. across as a teacher or a preacher or a. guru. Like it's that's not what it comes. across as. It's just that's you living. your life and having fun. And it's. almost making something. like you love cooking and that's. awesome. It's also just making something. that's quite laborious into making it. fun, right? I saw this video the other day. where it's like two guys who clean all. the places that no one wants to and they. video it and they put it on the.
stuff I love and it's so cool. Like. these guys will literally go around and. clean subway stations, clean this, clean. that, clean stuff, make stuff look nice. cuz they want to. And I think it's they. have a cleaning business, too. But it's. like it's so cool. And I'm like, that's. awesome. I'm like you're taking. something that's pretty hard to do, something that's chore, and you're. making it fun. And I think that at the very least, that's something we can all look to as. well is we all have things we have to do. every day that we don't want to do. And if you can try and make them more. fun, more enjoyable, whatever it is for. you, that works.
But I want you to know, yeah, I see all. these good comments. It always makes my day when I find you. on my for you page. Uh, and it's just. fun. And it's and it's fun to watch. interesting, curious, talented people. who, you know, to me, you're a comedian. in disguise. Really, I love that. Yeah. You're a comedian in disguise to. me. Like, it's like that's what. comedians do is they create great. characters. that people can laugh to and connect. with and resonate with and poke at. Yeah. And and that's what you've done. And. then when I met you in person, I was.
like, "Oh my god." Like, you're like one. of the sweetest, nicest people I've met. in person. and then you're like this. complete badass on like you know on on. social media and I love that that. juxosition of just. you know you being who you are and then. then playing this role. I feel like my content is it's like to. me I view it as myself but enhanced. Yes. Like the funny version of myself in some. videos, the more like polished version. version of myself in some videos, the. more I don't know creative version. It's.
like me, but depending on the outfit I. put on and what I cook, I become an. enhanced version of myself. And that's. so fun to me, which is also why I love. fashion and cooking because you can. dress up and feel a completely different. way. Like you feel, at least I feel. different ways depending on what I have. on. And that's kind of the energy that I. tap into and that's kind of the part of. my reality person that gets enhanced for. that video. Yeah. And I love that. I I love that. that's how you think about it because.
and and by the way that that becomes. really real in normal life too. I. remember when. I was saying earlier like when I would. go and see in the library or work I. remember I used to get dressed as if I. was doing something important. Yes. And that helped me and that was at a. time when I made no content. I didn't. have any videos. I was doing it for. myself. No one even cared who I was. But. dressing as if I was important helped me. yes. feel like I could apply for jobs that I. could show up as my best that if I. bumped into someone that because I was.
in a really tough place. I was rejected. from 40 companies after leaving the. monastery. No one would give me a job. I. was living in my parents loft. I was. getting rejected left, right, and. center. I didn't even know if I'd ever. go get a job. Was that hard for you? It was super hard because I'd become a. monk because I loved it. I'd left. because I didn't think it was right for. me anymore. And now the jobs that I. would have landed with ease three years. before because I had a first- class. degree, I couldn't get them. And that was really. hard for me because I just, you know, I. never imagined that I would not be able.
to get a job and pay my bills and living. with my parents again. I felt bad cuz I. was, you know, living off of them and. they don't have lots to offer me. So it. it wasn't easy. But I remember dressing. up for me felt like I can do something. important today. And for some people, they don't want to do that. You'd rather. be in your sweats, whatever. That's. awesome. But all of these little things. really work with our mind, like. psychologically. And I think we. underplay how much sight and scent and. sound can change how you feel.
Yeah. I don't own sweatpants actually. Like Lucky does. Sometimes I'll like. You own zero? I own zero sweatpants. I used to own. them, but then I got rid of them all. You're my inspiration. So to me, I don't. wear sweatpants apart from maybe when I. steal one of Ly's, but that's like very. rare. I just I think a lot of how I. perform during the day is how I dress. So if I want to get stuff done, I will. dress a certain way. There's like never. a day where I wake up and don't do my. skincare. There's never a day I don't.
wake up and do my hair. At least if I. actually want to feel like my peak level. of production, I do my makeup. Not. because I feel like I need to to feel. prettier, but more so it makes me feel. productive. I put on what I want to wear. to feel a certain way. If I'm like, "Oh, I'm going on a little lunch with my. friend and I want to feel like super. girly and whatever," I will wear a cute. dress. But if I'm like, "Okay, I. actually need to just power through. meetings all day long, I will wear a. suit because that makes me feel like I'm.
just going to get stuff done." So to me, it's all about dressing and doing things. to make myself feel a certain way. Yeah. Yeah. So I I'll never fly in sweats. I I don't. do that. I There's like things I do to. make myself feel a certain way. And I. know it doesn't work for everyone, but. growing up also, my dad had a weird. thing with sweatpants. He was like, "You're not There's this thing about I. think Carl Loggerfeld said something. about sweatpants. I don't remember. exactly what it is, but my dad basically.
said if you let me find it. Yeah, you need to find it cuz he had a. quote about sweatpants. What did he say? So, he said Carl Loggerfeld said, "Sweatpants are a sign of defeat.". Yes. You lost control of your life, so you. bought some sweatpants. Yes. That's what my dad would tell me. growing up. He said, "No way.". Carl said that and that's why we're not. we're not doing sweatpants. That's. crazy. if I ever was in my pajamas like. after 9:00 am he thought I was losing. it. So when I was 16, I bought my first.
sweatpants and then I really liked them. Whatever cuz like I feel like in Europe. like they love their little tracksuits. with like the Nikes. But then the older. I got I'm like actually my dad's right. for me personally like I feel like I've. lost control of my life if I wear. sweats. I cannot. the like the what I'll do is like get a. matching pajama set if I really feel. like I just need to veg out. I'll do a. matching pajama set. But that's just. what works for me. And I think that's. also the thing with like fashion in my.
videos. Like I want to feel good. I want. to feel confident. I want to dress up. and feel like these different people. So. that's where fashion plays like a. massive part in how I go about my day. Yeah. It's fun. It's fun. And and and. it's so interesting how the way we're. parented had such a like like Riley has. that with waking up early. So Raleigh. was someone that even if she went out to. a party at night, her mom would be like, "If you're not up in the morning, no, I'm telling you, like you're late." So Raleigh wakes up. so early every day because that's. hardwired into who she is. And I think.
we all have different versions of that. I was so excited after the pandemic to. never wear sweatpants again cuz I'm the. same. I don't like sweats, but during. the pandemic, I I fell into it and I was. You can find comfy denim. Like you don't. have to do skinny denim. Like I feel. like the more baggy ones are coming back. anyway, so just wear that then. For. sure. Yeah. I think what I'm hearing. from you, what I've learned from you is. that you've found a way to do life on. your time in your way. Yeah. With your permission. Yeah. And I think that's what we're all.
seeking. Like I think that's what we're. all looking for. What we all really want. is to be able to get married when we. want, to not get married if we don't. want, to have kids when we want, to not. have kids when we don't want. And I. think when we feel like we're living. according to everyone else's. expectations and society's rules, that's. what takes us away from who we really. are. And it seems like you found a way. to do things on your timeline and in the. way you want, whether it's sweatpants or.
not. And and there's some and and there's. beauty to that because I think that's. what we're all looking for. I think it's also nowadays I feel like. everyone tries to fit in certain molds. like everyone wants to buy certain. things, look a certain way, get get a. certain haircut, do certain makeup, and. I think that was never really appealing. to me. I love doing what I want to do. I. want to encourage you to do what you. want to do, regardless of what that may. look. I just love empowering people to. really find their truth and speak their.
truth and live authentically like. themselves, which is so important to me. And I just love sharing my journey and. hopefully that inspires someone to do. what they want to do. Not replicate what. I'm doing, but do what you want to do. and feel empowered in making decisions. that may not be the norm or may not be. what society wants you to do. And I. think that's what's so beautiful about. life. Like you can do whatever you want. to do because you get to live life and. experience all these things and do. exactly what you want to do. You don't.
have to do what I'm doing. You don't. have to do what every other influencer. is telling you to do or your parents are. telling you to do or whatever. You can. be yourself and that's so beautiful. I love that message. Nara, it's been such a joy talking to. you today. I've I've learned so much. I've learned so much about you. Thank. you. Uh I also have to figure out how you. became so eloquent. Like you're a. brilliant speaker. Like you're No, you. are you are I'm being honest. It's. wonderful to see someone young with an. old soul who is working on themselves,
working on their marriage, trying to. give their kids a beautiful, conscious. life in whatever way you believe is. important. And I'm I'm a fan. I'm going. to keep supporting and I and I love. watching you and your family grow. together. We we end every episode of On. Purpose with a final five. These have to. be answered in one word or one sentence. maximum. Uh, Sara Smith, these are your. final five. The first question is, what. is the best advice you've ever heard or. received? Don't try to be perfect, just do it.
Good advice. Mhm. Second question, what is the worst. advice you've ever heard or received? Try to get it perfect. cuz nothing's ever perfect. And if you. wait Okay, I'll I'm going off on a. tangent. You can. You can. If you wait for it to be perfect, you'll. never get started. I would much rather. you try your absolute best and put. something out or do something and. knowing you've tried your best rather. than constantly overthinking it trying. to get it perfect and never progressing. in life because of it. Uh question number three, what's the.
least Nara Smith thing you do? I don't style my hair every day. Okay. Unless I want to feel productive. So. sometimes on days where I'm like today. is just like not my day. I'm like okay, no hair done today. I love that. I look forward to those. days when I'm not on camera and I will. literally be wearing a hat. No, the hair is like the first thing I. don't do when I don't have to do. anything, but then like all the other. stuff I'm like, I actually have to get. ready or else I don't feel productive. But the hair sometimes I'm like, you.
know what, I'll just put it in a little. ponytail. It's fine. I love that. Uh, question number four. What role does faith, spirituality, that. play in your life? And how important is. it to you? It's so important because. it's my center and I feel like it guides. me and it keeps me grounded and it keeps. me humble and compassionate and it. really. makes me have a purpose and makes me. wake up in the morning knowing I can be. the best version of myself and I'm. protected and I'm blessed and I get to.
live life so beautifully because I have. faith. Uh, fifth and final question. We ask. this to every guest who's ever been on. the show. If you could create one law. that everyone in the world had to. follow, what would it be? Being more compassionate and not doing. things you wouldn't want people to do to. you. Cuz I think sometimes we don't. think about that and people just go off. and do the most insane, bizarre things. And I just want to create a law. Whatever you do not want done to you, don't do to other people.
That's great. We need that. Yes, we absolutely need that. Nara Smith, thank you so much. Thank you so much. for your openness, your vulnerability, your time and energy. What people don't. know is while Nara was driving here. today, she actually had a flat tire in a. in a rental car to get here cuz she's in. LA at my home at a studio and she went. through that to get here and she turned. up just the sweetest kindest energy and. I always feel like when someone's going. through something, you know, I was.
thinking about it. I was thinking, "Oh. my god, that would be so stressful. you're in a new town, you got kids, you. know, got all this stuff going on. And. she showed up just wonderful energy, just super still. And. I felt so bad. I'm sorry again for being. 30 minutes late. You just You do not need to apologize. But if you're not already following Na, please follow her across all of the. social media platforms. Also, let me. know on Tik Tok and Instagram. Clip cut. away. Show us what resonated with you, what connected with you, what advice is. going to help you. Whether it's breaking. through into doing something you love,
whether it's trusting your timing and. not trying to live on everyone else's. time, and whether it's finding your. passion and pursuing it with all of your. heart. I think there was so many great. insights and wisdom in this episode. I. can't wait to see what resonated with. you. And Nara, thank you so much again. and look forward to spending so much. more time with you. Thanks. Thank you. If you love this episode, you. will also love my interview with Kendall. Jenner on setting boundaries to increase. happiness and healing your inner child. You could be reading something that.
someone is saying about you and being. like, "That is so unfair cuz that's not. who I am." And that really gets to me. sometimes. But then looking at myself in. the mirror and being like, "But I know. who I am. Why does anything else matter?
