If You Want To COMPLETELY HEAL Your Body & Mind, WATCH THIS! | Gabrielle Bernstein & Jay Shetty

What we're running from first and. foremost is we're running from trauma. Even the subtle moments in time, someone. tells you you're stupid or you were in. the best of environments growing up, but. you were fat-shamed by a friend. Those. tiny moments that are seemingly. insignificant dictate the rest of our. lives. Hey everyone, welcome back to On. Purpose, the number one health podcast. in the world. Thanks to each and every.

single one of you who come back every. week to listen, learn, and grow. Now, today we have on a guest who has already. been on before, and we don't do that. very often, but I have to do it for this. special guest, a dear friend, an. incredible author, number one New York. Times best seller, multiple. international best-selling books, the. one and only Gabby Bernstein. Gabby, thank you so much for coming back to On. Purpose. Thank you. we've loved each other from the moment. we first met.

And that was 6 years ago now, believe it. or not. And we've talked about this multiple. times about how we just instantly. connected, and we found a way to stay. connected with me moving from New York. to LA, through to not being able to see. each other. We just said, hadn't seen. you for 3 years. Yeah. Uh but you wrote this incredible. book called Happy Days, the guided path. from trauma to profound freedom and. inner peace. And I want everyone who's. listening right now to go and order your. copy because you're going to love this.

conversation, and you're going to want. the book even more. So, go and grab your. copy right now. Uh but Gabby, you wrote. this book at a tough time. Yeah. You. know, at a really tough time in the. world. And I wanted to kind of take a step back. because when we're doing this work that. we do, and you've served millions of. people for years now that you've been. doing this. Like, this is really been a. labor of labor of love for you. You've. brought joy to so many people over over. a decade.

And my question is, what is happiness? Like, let's really talk about what is. happiness? Because we keep chasing these. words. People are chasing mindfulness or. happiness or joy or success. But it's. like, when you've thought about. happiness from all your learnings, all. your wisdom, all of your journey, what. is happiness? My answer today is quite. different than it would have been 6. years ago when we first did our first. interview. The difference is a greater. understanding of what happiness is not. I had to really go to that place to come.

through and be on the other side of what. it truly is. And I began to really. deepen my awareness and understanding of. what takes us out of that presence of. joy. And as uh Peter Levine, the founder. of Somatic Experiencing, he says that. trauma is the inability to be present. And trauma is often the the root cause. of most of our unhappiness, whether it's. big T trauma or small T trauma. Big T.

like uh living through a catastrophic. event or having kind of violence in the. household or small T trauma, being told. you're, you know, not good enough or. being bullied. But we all have it in some way. And when. we have it and it's not resolved, we. build up all of these defense mechanisms. against it and that creates the. inability to be present and to really. experience. life. with all of its moment-to-moment. richness. And right here, right now, looking at.

you and really taking you in and really. just feeling into the thrill of what. it's like to be back in the same room. with a very dear friend and somebody I. love. I even when I came in and I hugged. you, you know, 6 years ago I would have. been like, "Hey Jay!" and then like very. like not in my body and not in the. present moment with you because I was. still stuck in that that truncated. trauma. And so coming through the other. side of that,

what happiness means to me now is the. ability to be fully present and I'm not. using that language as like some. woo-woo, but to be fully present in the. moment with whatever is going on right. here, right now. And that is how I'm living today. and it's epic. It's It's wonderful. Like. the fact that I could be in the Uber on. my way here having a really awesome. conversation with the woman driving me. and getting to know a new person and.

then walking in a room and just being. able to hug my friend and feel that. So that was a really long answer, but. but it's important to to really. recognize that I did not know what true. happiness was. until nine books later. You know, 16 years as a spiritual. teacher. And I knew what it was for myself along. the way, but now I really feel like I've. gotten to a place where it truly has. transcended sort of these obvious. descriptions. I really like that.

definition and I really like that. approach because. I think that presence is so over talked. about but under valued and under. applied. We hear about it a lot as you. said, but we don't really know how to. live it because presence to us often. actually means judgment. Or presence means I'm present right now, but now I'm going to critique that or. I'm going to see that. Tell us how you. think about presence differently because.

often people say, "Well, when I'm. present, I just spot everything that's. going wrong right now." Or when I'm. present, I just start highlighting. things that I don't like or do like for. that matter. So how do you see presence. as being beyond judgment and criticism. and observation? That's an. outlook on it. So, the concept of be. present, it's just thrown around and. it's this concept of just sort of, you know, when you meditate and you. quiet your mind, you're Yeah, yeah, yeah, fine. But, really what I believe. is when you go on the journey of undoing.

the story lines of your past and to what. such a point and level that they no. longer have a hold on your nervous. system. And you begin to reorganize your. reactivity and your relationship to. yourself and how you respond to the. world, then you start to establish what. is known in SE somatic experiencing as a. felt sense. It's a felt sense of And. what that means is. I can stand outside my house in the.

country right now and this season change. and smell spring. I can look in my son's eyes and feel the. most insane rush of oxytocin move. through my heart when he just looks me. in the eye. And that's actually not the human. experience typically. Typically, we are. moving so fast, so dissociated from, so. checked out from. We are We have. disembodied. We're walking around like,

you know, without our heads on and And I. could only say it's because I've lived. like that for many, many years. And had to work really hard with my. meditation and with my spiritual. practice to keep coming back to. groundedness. And so, there's a lot of. that yo-yo of like, I'm out, I'm in, I'm. out, I'm in. But, what if you could live. life just fully in the presence of of. where you are in every given moment and. truly taking it all in. And that was. always sort of like, "Oh, that would be. so, you know, that's where we're going. That's what we're talking about in my in.

spiritual books.". But, I know that now. And. I know that you as my friend who's known. me for 6 years, I'm sure you can feel. that in being with me in this room right. now versus 6 years ago. And so and I've and I've had that. experience even through writing this. book, my ninth book. That presence came. through the is is infused in every. imprint. And so. I didn't think this was where we were. going, but it's actually it truly is. what happiness is to me. It's it's being.

in the experience of things. Yeah. And actually being able to experience. life. Yeah, I love what you said there. To me it really felt. that example of you looking into your. son's eyes. Like when you said that, I think what I. love about that experience is that it's. so immersive. And then you said to take. it all in. And I feel like that's really. what presence is is the ability to take. it all in. Through all your senses, right? That we. don't even use. I I often when I'm.

teaching meditation and we're activating. people's senses, we start recognizing. how we over rely on our eyes. The only. sense we actually observe through is our. eyes. And maybe then our ears. But our. nose, our sense of touch is fairly. uh unconscious, right? We're not always. aware of temperatures, textures, uh. scents, and things like that, which. which I find is we're not taking it all. in. Uh one of the things you just. reminded me of is I read a study.

recently that was talking about the awe. effect. And it was saying that we're. happier and we have more prosocial. behavior when we experience awe. That's. right. And when you spoke about your son's. eyes, I was thinking about the idea of. awe. So awe is generally nature, beautiful landscapes, views, but. someone's eyes could be awe. And it was. saying that the reason why we love awe. is because we simultaneously. feel tiny, but a part of something.

bigger. Beautiful. So you feel a sense of insignificance, but connectedness at the same time. And. I think that's what presence is to me. I love that. And I think that someone. listening right now might be like. what are they talking about? How could I. You know, because the truth is is I. probably I get that. I understand that. You know, what does that even mean to be. present? What does it even mean to be in. awe? Because. we live in such a protector mode. We.

have this huge build-up almost like a. wall built up against the presence of. that energy of that awe. And from a spiritual perspective, it's. almost like we have to dismantle each of. these bricks on this wall to just. reconnect to and return to that presence. within ourselves. And and truly even in. the midst of this experience of not. being connected to that awe and that. presence for many, many years, I was. still able to touch into it. It was I.

was on a path and a journey towards it. And I think that that actually really. benefited my readers and it benefited. the journey that I was on because that's. where many people were with me. And so. this stage of my life, 42 years young, and with much, you know, 16 years of. being in this field, I have this. experience right now of having. kind of up-leveled my well-being. And. that's actually what my hope is for my.

reader right now with the if you open. this book, right? Or if you are even. listening to us right now have this. conversation, you've unconsciously or. consciously raised your hand and said, "Yeah, I'm ready to up-level.". And the the the gift of having this. global crisis that we've all just lived. through is that so much so many of us. just started to crack open to the. reality that we couldn't just pretend. anymore. And. this is the journey of kind of. unearthing why we have been running and. how we've been running and how to stop. Yeah, what are some of the ways you. think.

we're not even aware you have you have a. chapter in the book called, you know, like why we run away and it's like. what are some of those hidden ways of. running away that you think stay with. us? Because I almost feel like there's. the obvious ways we know we run away. Then there's the middle like in between. hidden ones where we kind of convince. ourselves that we're not running away. And then finally we raise our hands as. you said and say I'm ready to level up. Yeah. What are some of those hidden. confusing places where we're running. away or excuses that happen that block.

us? I'm going to come out straight with. it, Jay. What we're running from first. and foremost is we're running from. trauma, period, end of story. And that. word has such a loaded stigma around it. and I'm just wanting to bust through. that now. Because we are all. traumatized. We You can't be alive in. this world right now at this time or. even decades ago without experiencing. trauma in some form. And like I said, some of us may have grow been brought up. with totally secure attachment, so much.

resilience, so much grace in our life. And we've experienced trauma, but maybe. you're able to move through it with more. ease because you had that safe safe. secure experience. But it doesn't mean. that it's you're unscathed. It doesn't. mean that you have missed missed, you. know, the life's lessons. Because even. the subtle moments in time, someone. tells you you're stupid. You're 6 years. old, right? Or you were in the best of. environments growing up, but you were. fat-shamed by a friend.

Those tiny moments that are seemingly. insignificant dictate the rest of our. lives. And so that's what we're running. from. The bigger T, the trauma, as you mentioned, you know, uh. well, actually I we haven't gone there. yet, but I reveal really big T trauma. that I'd remembered in my when I when I. was 36 years old. The bigger the T, the. trauma, child abuse or living with an. alcoholic parent, whatever it might be. But regardless of how big or small the T.

is, there is. something that needs to be undone. Because ultimately that's what we're. running from. And how are we running? We're running with drugs, we're running. with alcohol, we're running with food, we're running with judgment, we're. running with work, we're running with. rage, we're running with control. And. these all the the list that I just. identified are protector parts of us. So, let me just simplify it even more. I am now trained in internal family. systems therapy and the simplification.

of this is that we have these moments in. time where we disembody, we've been. experienced some kind of trauma, we. check out. And then we say, "Oh, I never. want to feel that shame. I never want to. feel that terror again." We just lock it. up. And those are called exiled parts of. us. They're often young parts. And then we build up all these ways of. protecting ourselves. And that's the. control, that's the the drugs, that's. the addiction, that's the workaholism, whatever it might be, to protect. ourselves from ever experiencing that. pain again.

We all have exiles and we all have. protectors. And this journey that we. need to go on is to really relax those. protector parts so that they can. remember that there is a source of love. and an internal parent within us that. can take care of us. It's incredible, isn't it, that what. you're saying are these protector parts. are actually causing us more pain. Yeah. So, we think we're protecting ourselves. by running away. So, we have this. protector part, but that protection is. not protection. It's actually deepening.

the wound. That's correct. But it looks and feels and sounds like. protection. I've I've been speaking to a. lot of people lately who are saying to. me, "Jay, I am too sensitive and empathetic. towards this world and I don't feel like. I belong here." Yeah. Right? Like. there's this feeling of like, "I just. want a world full of love and kindness. and I don't feel like I belong here. Yeah. It can feel scary. to look at the trauma, right? It's. scary. Like there's a big fear around.

whether it's a small t trauma or big t. trauma as you said, it can be really. tough when you said after doing so much. of this work 36 6 years ago was when you. were able to look at it. What do you. think blocked you up until that point. from looking at it even though you were. doing so much work or how did your work. that you were doing actually open that. up as well? Both, yeah. Well, dissociation. So, similar to what your friends are saying, it's like it's too scary to live in this. world and so you know what? Often one of.

the great protector parts is to. dissociate. To check out. To even. meditate above, right? To to just just. try to in some way numb that out. And. for me, I at 36 in a dream remembered. sexual abuse from my childhood. And I. had such a huge aha moment when that. dream surfaced because this is why I was. a cocaine addict. This is why I was a. alcoholic. This is why I was a. workaholic. This is why I was. controlling the [ __ ] out of everything.

in my life. So, there was relief in. knowing, okay, this is what I've been. running from and it was so extreme in my. case that my brain literally just you. know, it's a beautiful brain response to. say, oh, this is so overwhelming to the. system that it's going to be totally. checked out and dissociated from. But. even if you dissociate from a memory, it. still shows up in your body. It still. shows up in your gastrointestinal. issues. It shows up in your sleep. It. shows up in your relationships. It shows. up in your addiction. It shows up.

everywhere because you may not have the. the actual claiming of the memory, but. the memory is still in your nervous. system. I remembered at 36 because by. that stage, I'd already written about. I'd been 11 years sober. I'd probably. written seven books. You know, I'd be. I'd I'd been really on this very big. quest to my own spiritual awakening. And. all the work that I had done, everything. I'd written about, got me to the place. where I was safe enough to remember. You. know, everything's in the perfect order. There's no accident. I'd done a. tremendous amount of spiritual work, a.

tremendous amount of therapeutic work. I. got to a place in my life. also, this is important to recognize, where there was a lot of new things. happening around me. So, control was one. of the ways that I kept that exiled. story at bay. A lot of things in my life at the time. were falling out of control. So, I was. uh. my husband was leaving his job at JP. Morgan to come run our business. We were. talking about family planning. We had. just gotten married. So, these big life. moments are often when people do.

remember traumas. Or if it's a trauma. that you're aware of, it can really get. activated and come to the surface. So, just something for the listener to. consider. And. it was so horrific and so scary to. remember that, but the journey that I've. underwent since that time is what allows. me to put my face on this book cover and. have it say the guided path from trauma. to profound freedom and inner peace and. mean every freaking word of that. And to. be able to stand behind that with full.

integrity, authenticity, and and power. To be able to say, "You know what? So, all these people are so traumatized. Everyone's so traumatized." And I can. say, "Go do this.". And. it's it's it's a gift to be able to live. to tell. Yeah, absolutely. I I really. appreciate what you said about being. safe enough. Yeah. Because I think that. when you start this work, it's not that all of it happens at the.

same level, and it's not that the work. looks the same every year. And so, when. you start doing personal growth, self-development, spiritual work, whatever it may be, it's going to look. different every single year. New things. are going to be unlocked and opened and. unearthed. And so I think people can. feel comfortable that if they're on the. journey That's right. there will be a. point at which it's safe enough, in your. words, to feel that you can be revealed. to that. And And I wanted to share. something here because I I love this. dedication and when you said that about. getting married and and trauma, you.

actually dedicate this book to your. husband. For my husband Zach, thank you. for loving all of my parts and helping. me feel safer than I ever thought. possible, which I thought was beautiful. Yeah. You reading that is like really. emotional for me. Because, you know, it was a trauma for him to be married to. me. And you know, Jay, I open this book. by saying that my publishers came to me. and I sent them the manuscript, and. these are publishers I'd worked with for. so many years, and I'd written books and.

they would just accept the manuscript, The Universe Has Your Back, ready to. ready to print, you know, Super. Attractor, ready to print. And I send. them this manuscript and they write back. like, "We need to talk.". And I get on the phone with them and. they're like, "We're really nervous for you, Gabby, because you're revealing so much and. it's one negative story after the next. and we don't think that you're showing. your true strength.". And my response was, "My ability to be. this vulnerable is my true strength.".

But it wasn't just them, it was Zach. Like, when my husband read this book, he. edits my books before they go to the. publisher. I have an editor, then it. goes to Zach, and then it goes to the. publisher. And when he read this, it was really. triggering for him, super activating. And there was moments when he would say. to me, "I didn't even know this was. going on." And that's so emotional for. me because when you're living in that. kind of recovery, in that crisis, there's so much shame wrapped up in it. And especially when you're the self-help.

book author, you know, that the shame is so extreme that you. feel so alone in the journey. And. I just have such a deep gratitude for my. husband for holding me in that. I have. gratitude for. all the whole team of therapists that. helped me in that, but but particularly. for my spiritual connection because. without that, I would have been really. alone. Yeah. And so that's really what I. want this book to do for people is to. help them know they're not alone in this. journey and that we all have a lot that. we can look at and gently and slowly and.

safely begin to peel back the layers or. take the bricks off the wall. And uh. yeah, but just just just hearing you. read that acknowledgement out loud and. that that that dedication out loud is. just. it just says a lot about. what it means to hold another person in. their trauma. The reason why it touched. me is because again, I think a lot of. listeners, a lot of comments that I see, a lot of story tags that I see, and and. people that I speak to in my personal.

life, trauma. can break partnerships. Yeah, oh yeah. Massively. Oh yeah. And we see either people struggling in. shared trauma, struggling with the. individual trauma being passed over to. each other, wounds being shared. Explain to us. how someone can hold space for someone. during their. trauma journey and work and as they're. on this path. And actually more. importantly, because you do tell us the.

guided path from trauma to profound. freedom, how do you help someone help. you? Yeah. I'm really interested in that. Yeah. Because because I find that so. often we expect someone else to help us, but how do you help your partner help. you rather than expecting them to be a. therapist, which is really unrealistic? Totally unrealistic. Well, there's. there's a lot of answers to that. question. So, the best way you can help. them help you is to to just tell the. truth to the the of your ability. So,

even if it's the trauma that you're. facing, actually um on my on my podcast. I workshop people and I dear gabbied. someone yesterday and she was talking. about how this book is bringing up a lot. for her and she's starting to face into. it and her partner just doesn't. understand. And I said to her, "Listen, yeah." And and I said, "Listen, you may not feel safe enough yet to let. him in on your full journey or even what. you're facing into, but it would be. extremely valuable for you to go to him. and say, 'Hey, a lot of stuff is coming.

up for me right now. It's old stuff from. my childhood and it's really scary for. me and I'm reading this book and I'm I'm. I want to assure you I'm doing this. really beautiful work on this and I'm. committed to maybe seeking out therapy. and going deeper and my intention is to. really create a safe environment for. myself and for our relationship, but uh. that's the truth of where I'm at right. now.'. And that may be the only truth that you. can tell because it's just too much. shame wrapped up in telling exactly. what's up. That comment, that truth,

that extension of of of vulnerability. even in that slight way is extremely. soothing to the other partner because. if you just leave them completely in the. dark, and they they don't understand why. you're so reactive. They don't. understand why you might pick up the. drink. They can't understand why. And. so, giving them a little look behind the. why is a very valuable thing. Another. thing I recommended to her was to have. him read the book because any you know,

when you've got unresolved trauma, big T or small T, the patterns are just. textbook, Jay. You know what I mean? Like, if you were to look at all of my. symptoms, you'd be like, "Check, check, check, check, check, check, check.". I now, having done my research and. having studied this and having lived it, I can spot it in humans everywhere. I'm. like, "Big T trauma, small T trauma, big. T, big T, big T." You know, I can see. it. Like, I kept asking Zach at times to. read this one book that was about women. who had lived through childhood abuse.

And it was a little bit too much for. him. But handing him a book like this or. handing a partner a book like Happy Days. allows the partner to be like, "Oh, wow. This whole story sounds just like my. partner." Or "Oh, yeah, my partner does. that, too." And it gives you an insight. of like one, the opportunity for the. traumatized person to say, "Look, I'm. not alone.". And then for the partner to recognize, "Oh, this is a real thing." I think. those are great answers. I I love both. of those. I would highly recommend. everyone who's listening and watching,

if you're reading Happy Days right now, make sure you share even paragraphs of. it. You may take a picture and send it. to your partner or to a friend. Uh and. of course, if you're not reading it, make sure you grab a copy of the book as. you're listening right now because I do. believe that what Gabby's saying is so. deeply true. that if we have not healed our traumas, we're going to carry them with us into. every workplace, relationship, scenario, and it just gets harder because that.

trauma gets tied up in more people's. trauma, and then you can't even tell the. difference between yours, someone. else's, and collective. And so I feel. like the earlier we can do this work, the healthier it can be for us. And I I. love what you just said about the idea. of informing someone. "Hey, this is what. I'm going through. This is why this week. I might be really irritable and why I'm. really struggling. This week I'm going. to need your support." And I think I I. do this with Riley often even about.

small things where I'm like, "I've got. this really big thing on Thursday. I'm. really nervous about it. Like just know. that That's right. this week, every gap. I get, I'm going to be super silent. because I'm going to be preparing my. energy for this thing." That's a small. thing of just something coming up. instantly. But what about when you're. doing something internal? So I I love. those, and I would encourage people to. even if someone can't read a book that. you send them screenshots and pictures. and it's going to get them moving and. and this book does a great job at. breaking those areas down. I like that idea too of being like,

"Hey, read this page or listen to this. one section of the audio book because. or just listen to the conversation. between Gabby and Jay because what it. does is it just gives a little insight. and and then that also helps you as the. reader as the as the person on the. journey to take away the shame. There's. a chapter in the book actually that's. called um speaking the unspeakable and. it's all about shame. And you know, here. I was Jay, I was 36, I was just facing. into this. I'm at a retreat leading the.

freaking retreat with two other women. And it's a retreat on you know, women. facing their trauma and transcending. their past. And I'm about 6 months into my own. recovery. So, I had no business teaching. at that time. But I didn't realize that. That's actually, you know, part of. some of the vulnerable things I share in. this book that my publishers were like, "Do you really want to say that?" Yes, I. have to say it all. Um so, here I was. and I'm I'm teaching that I'm leading. this retreat and so in the other. teacher's session, I'm sitting in the.

room doing the workshop with them. And. the workshop's all about shame. I'm. like, "Okay, I like, you know, I'll. partner up with somebody and I'll just. like hold space for them, right?" And. here I am in this dialogue about shame. and I realize at 36 years old, seven. self-help books, 11 years of sobriety, you know, deck, you know, over a decade. of work on stage speaking about. spirituality and I sit there and I'm. like, "Oh my god, shame. I didn't realize I had it." Wow. It's so.

buried. It's the most impermissible. emotion. that it's it is the exiled part. It was. so so unsafe. I mean, I was like, "Of. course I'm lovable. Of course I'm. adequate. I don't have shame." You know, we all do. But it was so buried so deep that facing. into that, you know, is a very gentle. process. And so, one of So, another. intention here is in this conversation, in this just speaking of trauma, just. giving voice to trauma, is to just end. the stigma and shift the shame. Because.

that shame is why we don't open up to. our partners. That shame is why we don't. even open a book like this. Yeah, and. that's and that's actually what I was. going to say that I think one of the. biggest things I hear is "Oh, no, I have. no trauma." Like, "No, no, I don't I. don't have any shame." Like, "No, no, no, I'm you know, and I've I've even led. people I've worked with through inner. child meditations and and, you know, work and. they don't allow themselves to go there. Oh, yeah. And one of the biggest things.

I also find is people don't want to go. there because they're scared they'll get. stuck there. Totally, totally, totally. Right? And so, tell us a bit about that. path of opening up something but not. getting stuck there. What is the. difference between someone who opens up. a book like this? Obviously, you've. given the whole path and it's in here, but I mean like that difference between. someone who opens up a part of. themselves, then just feels like their. whole life is collapsing, versus someone. who opens it, has the courage to look at. it, but then is able to pass through. What What have you noticed of the.

difference? You have to titrate in and out. It's not. You cannot when you're dealing with big. wounds. Big T or small T, I'm going to. keep going back to that because some. people listening are like, "Oh, you. know, nothing's ever happened to me.". And if I was sitting with you right now, I'd go find 30 things that are your that. you're running from, you know, or one. major thing you're running from. So, wherever you are on the spectrum, the first. thing to really identify is that you. can't just rip the Band-Aid off right. away. And you have to go slow. And there. are plenty of people that I have right. now that in my world, girlfriend just.

recovering from postpartum depression, I'm like, "Do not read the book right. now. You know, put it on the shelf and. wait." Um if someone's opening the book. and it's super activating to them, the. answer could be, you know, go back into. your therapy and then use the book when. you feel safer. Don't put yourself in a. position where you're going to blow out. your system. with too much digging too fast. Now, with that said, inside this book, I hold you by the hand and I walk you so.

slowly through these steps. Over and. over again, I say, "If this is too much. for you, please skip ahead. Read the. next chapter. Go back to chapter three, the body-based work." There's a whole. chapter on how to settle your nervous. system through body-based practices. And. that in itself can just be so soothing. to someone as they start to open up to. the possibility that there's something. that they need to face. And so through. breath work, through physical somatic. work, through through body talk, and. just even getting in touch with what's.

going on in your body, there's so much. relief. And so it's just a very slow. process. I don't think people can just. rip the band-aid off at once. It's not. It's not possible. Yeah, I'm glad you. said that because I think a lot of. people think they have to or they think. that that's the only way and I was. actually going to talk about that. I. love this section on hiding behind the. body and there's a beautiful quote here. that you have that says, "I came to. accept that I didn't have a gut problem. I still had a subconscious emotional. problem." Yeah. And this whole chapter for everyone. who's reading along or or is going to.

get the book is called a hiding behind. the body. Uh and that to me was huge because I. think today we're all trying to be. healthier, hopefully. Everyone who's. listening to this podcast at least I. know is. People are changing their diet. They're. changing their sleep routine. They're. changing the vitamins they take and the. supplements they take, but then they're. still wondering. why things aren't getting worked out. And I think a lot of people who are. listening can relate to that. And then you start to recognize that the.

body is just a window into what's. actually sitting behind there. What have. you found because you've been. researching this, studying this, you. give a guided path. What were other. useful resources? Yeah. On that journey that you kind of. recommend to people in the book to say, "Hey, check this person out." or think. about this idea or area of your work. In. that chapter, I really reference the. work of Dr. John Sarno, who wrote. Healing Back Pain, he wrote The Mind. Body Prescription, and all of his work.

was really based on the premise that our. physical conditions are psychosomatic. And by no means in my book, in my work, or in his work was there any reference. of don't get that medication or don't go. on that therapeutic path physically, whatever it might be, but to really look. closely at what are the belief systems. and the impermissible feelings that are. not being met. behind the physical sens- sensations. So, for me in the book, I reference how.

I had decades of gastrointestinal. issues. And what I recognized through my. healing journey is that I didn't have. gastrointestinal issues. I had. unresolved trauma. I had impermissible. rage. I had impermissible terror. I had. impermissible shame. And as I began to become safer in my. nervous system, safer in my mind, safer. uh you know, reprocessing memories, I have zero gastrointestinal issues. I. love hearing that. I didn't have to change You know, I did.

for decades, you know, SIBO diets and. this thing and I had, you know, this. supplement. And all of that is necessary. when you're having acute problems. You. need medication, you need vitamins, you. need diets to just get back to baseline, and for sure. But all of it goes away. With so many of our So, so people are. like, "Well, how do I know if I have. trauma?" And I'm like, "Well, do you. have a sleep disorder? Do you have. gastro issues? Do you have TMJ? Do you. have So, go to the body first. Do you. have acne?" You know, and then it goes. even deeper. Do you have panic attacks?

Do you have depression? Do you But the. bottom line is is that our body is a. first responder and our body is such a. beautiful way to reveal to us what is. what is needing to be healed and in fact. we talked about protector parts. The. physical body actually is a form of. protection, right? So we send from the. Sarno perspective we have a nervous. system response because our traumas are. triggered. Our body gets tense. We go. into that fight flight response. So that. tension shows up in the stomach that. tension shows up in the migraine that.

tension starts to you know block oxygen. from flowing to these areas from a. gastrointestinal perspective it stops. the GI tract from actually you know. moving moving bowel our bowel movements. and then what happens bacteria builds up. and then you actually do have a real. diagnosis of SIBO or IBS or whatever. Well, if you actually relax your nervous. system. your whole system can start to move. You. can have that. perfect digestion begin to settle.

because you're relaxed and in that. relaxed state your body can heal. And so. we have to really look at the. psychosomatic effect of our physical the. physical conditions from a psychosomatic. perspective. Woo, that already relaxes. my nervous system going like oh wow like. that's where it is like because I think. a lot of people right now are just we're. tinkering with so many parts of our life. and then we're wondering why do I still. not feel the way I want to feel. Right. like I'm doing everything right and I've. I've been in that position myself where. I'm like I'm doing everything right. Why. am I still not feeling good?

And sometimes it is biological if you if. you're psychologically done done some of. the work and then it's the other way. around as well. What were you surprised. by when you started doing this work? What was one of the big surprises that. came along as you started to do the work. on yourself that you actually thought. wow I I didn't expect this like I didn't. think this was going to happen. Well, I. was surprised by the shame. Like I was. like wow I have shame like what is that. right? That was so strange right? I'm. like this spiritual teacher I even. recognize my shame. What was the shame. for? I mean, the shame, you know, when.

you experience sexual abuse in any form, whether you're particularly as a child, the shame is it's my fault, the shame is. I'm wrong, and you know, underneath all. of this is the belief that we're. inadequate and unlovable. My therapist. taught me that, and I remember her. saying that, and at the time I'm like, I'm very adequate and lovable. Like, what the hell are you talking about, you. know? Decade later, wow, that is absolutely a core belief. that I carried for so long. And another big thing I realized was how.

my spiritual practice actually really. saved me and was the through line of all. of the guidance of the work that I was. led to. And I in the book reference very. spiritual therapeutic practices for. trauma. So, I reference EMDR, which is. eye movement desensitization and. reprocessing. It's bilateral brain. stimulation that allows you to reprocess. memories. I reference SE, somatic experiencing, which is a body-based trauma therapy. IFS, which I went as far as to get. trained in, and IFS is all about the.

caring for your inner child parts. And these specific therapies are all. very spiritual. In the clinical space, they may not be. referenced in that way, but I can say. that, right? And I can be the spiritual. voice for them. And I believe it's. spirit that that my my spirit guides, that my connection to God very, very, very clearly laid out this path for me. And not just for me to live it, but also. for me to share it. And then I would say. the one of the biggest surprises though.

was when I would meet these different. therapeutic practices, each time I was. blown away. I was like, oh my god, what, you know, I was carrying that, oh my. god, next level. That is so present in. my body, oh my god, you know, and just. witnessing and witnessing. And. I I that the big one of the biggest. surprises also Jay is that when you live. with trauma, you think that's who you. are. You just think I am a workaholic. I. am a control freak and you don't know.

that there's a way out. And I am so. proud that the greatest gift I'll give. this world is my bravery to go to the. places that scared me and come out the. other side so that I can live to tell. that this works, that you can survive. trauma and that you can thrive. I feel. it, the confidence in in this space and. I also just appreciate how. you were able to push back your control. parameters and protectors. Because like.

you said, you've been doing this work. for a long time. You've been teaching. this work. You're helping people. You're. changing people's lives and then going, "Well, actually there's another layer.". What layer of love was that work in the. trauma? Like when you said we have that. deep-held belief of I'm unlovable. and. I'm inadequate. inadequate. How do you fall in love with. yourself again when you realize that's. at the root of it? Because really you're. not trying to fall in love with yourself.

before you're trying to protect and fix. and then all of a sudden now you're. seeing at this stage that. Yeah, you return to. Yeah, exactly. I'm going to answer that from an IFS. perspective. And when I when I use the. acronym IFS, it's Internal Family. Systems Therapy and it's not actually. about your family, your outside family, it's about your inner family. So you've. got your exiled parts of you and you've. got your protector parts of you and then. we all have self. Your language you might call it higher. self or God or the universe and I did. that as well for many years, inner.

guidance. And self is self with a capital S and. what self is is the internal parent. It's the undamaged, resourced part of. who we are. It's the man that I'm sitting with here. right now. You show up to your podcast. in self, and that's actually why it's so. resonant with people because they feel. that there's no ego attached to it. There's no You're not showing up with. like a presence of neediness or. anything. You're showing up This is me. I'm This is what I'm here to do. I'm on.

my mission. But when your wife triggers. you, your protector parts might show up. And you might start to get into an. extreme pattern. And that's for all of. us. So, we all have access to this. undamaged resource part of who we are, self or courage, compassion, calmness, creativity, curiosity, connectedness. And when we are in that presence of self. like you and I are here right now, anything's possible. I could say to you.

right now something really difficult for. you to hear, but you would hear it with love because. I'm grounded in that in that self. energy. And so, the main way to fall back in. love with yourself. is to let self become the leader of your. inner system. So, it's not like we want to control or. push down or manage these protector. parts of ourselves. There's no bad. parts.

We just want to help them be less. extreme. And how? We want to let them know that there's an. internal parent. Let me give you a. really clear example, okay? So, I let's say something triggered me last. week. I was like in a conversation with. some friends and I was like, "Oh my god, they don't like me." Like an old exiled. part was there. And when the exiled part. comes up, we don't want to feel it, right? So then, one of my protectors. tries to numb it out. And the protector. is the judger in that case. Like, "Well,

they're wrong, right?" And I go into. like all the reasons they're wrong. because I don't want to feel that shame. And then I'm like, "Well, oh my god, no, I'm wrong because I you know, so we. attack others, we attack ourselves." And. so, those are protector parts. And the. judger came up. Somebody has to. be wrong, right? So the judger was there. to protect me from feeling that. impermissible feeling. And then because. I have this this great through line to. self, I was able to notice, "Okay, I. notice there's a protector up. Okay, notice. Where do I feel that in my body? Notice. Is it Does it have a color? Does.

it have a shape? Is there Is there. something that it wants to say to me? What do I know about it?" Okay, I know. it's young. I know it's a young girl. who, you know, doesn't feel like she is. understood in high school, right? And I. know that she's just wanting to blame. others cuz because she's so scared. And what does she need right now? She needs a hug. She needs to breathe. And I can let her actually speak to me. And I can listen to that part. And then I can give her what she needs.

And so it's literally a practice of. becoming your own internal parent, creating the secure attachment that we. did not get from our parents with. ourselves. And there's no greater form of self-love. than letting self with a capital S lead. your entire system. And you have to see the the thing here, Jay, is I didn't shame that part. I. wasn't like, "Oh, that judger is there.". Or that young child part's showing up.

like, "You're a loser." I actually. really got curious about it. I was. compassionate toward it. I brought a. calm energy to it. And so the goal here really is to begin. to soften and relax the protectors. Because frankly, Jay, you know, the. protectors are not bad, right? Like the. controller wrote nine books in 11 years. You know, she did a good job. So but we. just want her to be less extreme. Yes. And so she can keep producing and keep. creating, but not in that extreme way. It's a lot of density. In chapter seven.

of the book, I go deep into IFS, but I. want to just reiterate for the listener, notice, no need. Notice in the moment. when you can if you have enough. awareness to notice that you're. triggered, notice it in your body. What does it feel like? Is there a. color? Is there a shape? What do you. know about it? And then what does it need? And give yourself a moment to try that. out. Even though there's so much depth. to it, I felt that was very clear. because. I think that's what we're ultimately. avoiding is accepting that we have an. inner child need. That's right. Right?

It's like that's ultimately what we're. running away from is that we do have a. gap internally and it isn't going to be. solved through something in the external. world. It's not going to be solved. through someone saying something to us. in a nice way or someone changing. Right. Right? Like it's not going to. Yeah, like my husband changing his tone. is never going to heal my wounds, right? It may make a world create a world where. I'm less activated, less frequently, but. like someone else's behavior cannot.

change your reactivity. And that doesn't. mean the other person shouldn't show up. as well, but like you have to be your. internal parent. Your partner can't be. your parent. Frankly, in many ways your. parent can't parent you back to that, you know? You, especially if you're, you. know, 42 years old or whatever it is. As a little child, the expectation is. you'll have that, but most don't. That's so powerful because I think most. of us what we're yearning for is to live. in a less deactivated state. So ideally. what we want is.

if everyone was just nicer and kinder, then things would just feel better, right? But the reality is that not. everyone's just going to be nicer and. kinder. Uh and if we can be in that. environment, that's beautiful. It's a. great environment to grow in. But what. you just said was so brilliant. You were. like, you know, if my husband changing. his tone is not going to solve the. wound. And and I think that that's why. the path that you just laid out is. fantastic because we're constantly. checking with everyone else's needs.

We're trying to be pleasing to other. people's needs. I don't know the last. time most people, if we're honest with. ourselves, and I want everyone who's. listening to truly be honest with. yourself. When was the last time you. checked in with yourself? And not just. yourself, your inner child self, the. younger self as Gabby was saying and. said, "What do you need?" I just I mean, even me, I'm I'm listening I'm going, "Can't remember the last time I did that. for myself.". distinction here, too, is that you're. asking the protector part what it is,

because the exiled parts are really. locked up, Jay. Like they're like locked. in a basement. And to start to touch. into the exiles, I would recommend doing. that with IFS therapy, like with an IFS. therapist. You can learn more about it. I do an interview with Dick Schwartz on. my podcast, and then obviously in this. chapter there's a whole dialogue about. IFS. And we can give some resources. links, as well, in the show notes. But. more importantly, that you would go. through that deeper exiled child part.

journey with a trained therapist, particularly in this system. But that you right now, right here, can. start to just be a parent to those. protector parts. And that's the first. step. Because the protectors are really. the ones that you can see. The child's. activated, but the protector shifts. right in. The protector's like, "Oh, I'm. going to lock that door." They're like. there's a little activation. No, thank. you. I'm going to put that fire out by. picking up a drink. I'm going to put. that fire out by raging, you know? And. so you want to work with the alcoholic, you want to work with the rager. And the.

more you soften your relationship to. those protector parts, the closer you. can get to the exile. Yeah. Because the. protectors are there, first responders. Like, no way, you're not going to get. behind that door. And so you have to. start to soften those relationships. That's good. That's a good distinction. for me, because I was Yeah, I think I my. space was still with the exiled part, but as you said, for a lot of people. those may be too locked up. Yeah. And so you know, for some it's. less so, you know, for some for some. people that have done a lot of personal. growth work. Like if you and I were to. do a session in IFS right now, we could. get to your child parts and you would be.

very safe there. You've done a lot of. work. You've got your safe in your. system. We could go to an exile. But I. would never like the average person that. hasn't done a lot of personal growth. work. It's not it's not safe to go. there. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's that's. without the therapy, yeah. Yes, yeah, absolutely. And that's a. great distinction to make again that we. don't want people. uh going off and trying to do something. that. Yeah. isn't going to serve them. Yeah. Uh you you talk a lot about, you. know, in the book the I think one of the. last chapters or the last chapters love. every part. Um and and I think.

just as we believe we're unlovable and. inadequate, we somehow believe that that's not. possible. Right? Somewhere inside of us there's a. belief that it's actually not possible. to be happy Yeah. or to love ourselves. Like it just exists there somewhere. Do. we develop. a belief that it exists before we find. it or do we start looking for it and. find it along the way? Hm. I was looking. for it and found it along the way. And I remember being.

in the early stages of remembering the. trauma and waking up super depressed, waking up. so down, so scared, not totally. disembodied for months. When you. actually remember dissociated trauma, you kind of go back into it. So you're. living in terror. Like everything is. just danger. And I was just like there's no way out. But I was so committed. And so I think the most important. message is it's not about getting out. overnight. In in AA, when you get sober,

they say, "I wish you a slow recovery.". Cuz that means that you're doing the. work. Wow, I love that. It means that. you're you're going under the surface. and peeling back the layers. And so the. same goes I mean. addiction addiction really is a root. cause is trauma period. So it's really. going back slowly into the trauma. And. so I would say that to the person that's. recognizing trauma, is I wish you a slow. recovery, meaning that every small layer. that you peel back is a miracle. And the more you add up those miracle.

moments, the closer you get to living a. miraculous life. So, you can celebrate. your successes along the way. So, for today, maybe you pick up Happy. Days and you just read the first. chapter. That's a success story. Maybe. you just listen to this podcast episode. again. That's another layer. Maybe you. practice one of the breath practices in. the book. That's another layer. And it's. it's it's a very very gentle process, and you have to be fully celebrating.

every step of the journey. Am I done, Jay? I'm not done. I still go to therapy. every Wednesday. I still have sometimes. two additional sessions a month. I still. am deep in EMDR. I'm still doing my own. IFS on myself. I'm going to be going. forever. Just shining the crystal. Yeah. And so, but there is really freedom on. the other side. There really is. Well, that's that presence again, right? In. being present in the process, as you. just said. But, I think that's what's so. hard right now, is that. because of the way the world's going, everything's become more instant, more.

fast, fast recovery, quick fix. And I. mean, that's always been the way, but. it's become more and more and more and. more and more. And then, when you're. being asked to do slow recovery and the. real work, which is what we know. genuinely has the reward during and at. the end of the journey. I find that that. collision is so hard for people, because. they wake up with resistance again. So, it's like just when you had that moment, when you felt you had a breakthrough,

you wake up the next morning and the. resistance is fully back. Yeah. That's actually why I think it's. valuable to build up your toolbox of. self-regulating techniques. And they're. in here. And the reason that's valuable. is that you can still feel relief along. the way. You can still have fun along. the way. not postponing the journey, yeah. You've. known me for 6 years. 6 years ago, I was. like totally in a very different nervous. system that I am now. But I still had fun. Oh, 100% yeah, yeah, yeah.

still could be with you and just have a. great time. It was a different kind of. fun and it was a different kind of. experience because I wasn't in the. presence that I'm in now, but it's not. like you can't live your life and have. joy along the way. Yeah. Like the these especially if. you're on the journey. That's why it's. called the spiritual path or spiritual. journey. If you're on the path and the. journey, every step of it's an. up-leveling. And so. and especially if you have this arsenal. of these self-regulating tools, okay, I. can be going through some big stuff, I. can be slowly getting sober, I can be.

slowly recovering from trauma, I can be. slowly going through therapy, but at the. same time have these amazing. meditations, have these amazing breath. practices that soothe me, have these. great breakthroughs in my therapy or in. my relationship and just celebrate those. miracles along the way. Tell me how you. think about trauma differently as being. a mom. Oh, dude, if you've got unhealed. trauma and you are about to become a. parent, particularly I would say for. both parents, but particularly a mother. that's going to carry a baby and deliver. a baby in in the first early days be the.

food for the baby and the whole thing, uh you want to do this work. because if you don't, you're what will. happen, you know, if you even if you do. or you don't, doesn't matter, it'll all. come flooding in. In my case, not only did the trauma. flood in, but I also was hit with really. terrible postpartum depression, suicidal. postpartum depression, I write about it. in the book because it actually often if. you have unresolved trauma can be uh. very activating even with the. biochemical condition of postpartum, it. just can take it to the next level. So, for me, my having my son was one of.

the biggest trauma responses I've. experienced in my life was postpartum. That's a beautiful blessing because when. you make the commitment to have a child, you are. having to ask yourself two questions. Am I going to do this the way it was. done for me, or am I going to show up big time? And how do you show up? You show up for. yourself. Because the more you re-parent yourself, the clearer the path to parenting your.

child. There's a chapter in this book called. re-parenting yourself. It's all here. It's just It's almost a joke. And it's. the chapter called re-parenting. yourself. We're in early 2020, I'm like, you know, running my business, like everyone's in. this like storm. My kid's home, he's 2. years old, he's napping twice a day. It's I mean, Zach are the only ones with. him at that time. cuz everybody's home. And I went diving. deep into the the parenting books, particularly Dan Siegel's work. And he.

has a lot of methods, and one of them I. loved the four S's: seen, soothed, safe, secure. And I started applying this with my kid. And I was making sure I was really. seeing him and soothing him. Not just. physically, but like really. energetically. And creating a safe. environment. Not just that he won't fall. over on the, you know, what, but a safe. energetically. And that creates a secure attachment. bond. Now, I was looking at this experience. with Oliver, and I was like, no one ever did this for me, you know? I. was like, but why can't I do this for. myself?

And so I wrote a whole chapter. I I did. it for myself, and I wrote about it. And. so the best parenting advice I have is. to do the work on yourself. Yeah. Yeah. This isn't a parenting book. as much as it is because it's. re-parenting yourself to be a better. parent. Yes. Yeah, absolutely. And And with. that, I mean, it's again the shame. again, right? Like from the mothers that. I know well who who are open and honest. with me, if you go through that post giving. birth, it's like the shame and guilt in. that. Because. Because it impacts. So it's again. another opportunity to to choose shame.

and guilt. Uh and then you don't tell. anyone because as a mom, mom guilt is. even harder to share. What did you do as. in that period? I mean, obviously you're. doing all of this work, but what did you. specifically do to to move through that? So, here I was now at that stage had. published. maybe seven or eight eight books, something like this. And you know, I'm. just sort of showing the world of where. I was a self-help book author. Very. entrenched in the wellness space,

brought up homeopathic, really believing. in natural medication medicine, never. had fulfilled a prescription at a. pharmacy. And. in many ways probably was a part of the. stigma around mental health cuz I would. be in my audiences and people would say. to me like, "I'm depressed." And I'd be. like, "Try this meditation.". And I didn't realize if you're having a. biochemical condition, it doesn't work. if you're having a biochemical. condition. And so, I was having a biochemical. condition, but not fully giving it. voice. And I got to the point where I was.

having insomnia. I had insomnia for 4. months. And when you don't sleep, you get. extraordinarily depressed. And for me it. became suicidal. I open the chapter talking about how I'm. driving to Mother's Day brunch and I'm. in the backseat with my son and under my. breath I say I want to kill myself. And so, that's where I was at. And I did. not get help for 4 months, maybe longer. I was undiagnosed because of the stigma. and the shame. of what mental illness is.

And you know, we have to really begin to. look at the shame and the stigma around. it. And so, for me in in my experience, here I was in this wellness world and. you know, finding that ashwagandha wasn't going to. be the answer and melatonin wasn't going. to be the answer and you know, L-theanine for my stomach wasn't going. to be the answer. And even in the. therapy, the therapeutic tools were no. longer working. The meditation was no. longer working. And finally, I hit a. massive bottom. Just four four months of.

not sleeping. I actually missed a talk, a live talk. It was the first time in. over a decade that I didn't show up. because I hadn't slept the night before. And then I finally reached out to a. friend who was a psychiatrist and I. said, "I need help." and he put me in. touch with a postpartum psychiatrist. I. saw her the next day. She diagnosed me. within 10 minutes. She said, "You have. postpartum depression, postpartum. anxiety. You have to get medicated.". And she saw all that resistance in me.

and she looked at me and these were the. words that helped me. She said, "This medication will give you. a safer baseline. so that you can do the deeper trauma. work.". And those words just punctured me. I. just heard everything she said and I. said, "Okay. All right, I'll do it.". And I took that prescription and I went. down to the pharmacy and I stood in the. pharmacy with my husband. I was like, "What do I do? I don't even know what to. do. I've never even filled a. prescription." He's like, "You hand it. to the pharmacist.". And I held that medication in my hand.

and the placebo effect just set right in. and I was like, "There is a way out of this." Wow. And I. was having a biochemical condition. You. can't mess with that. You cannot. meditate your way out of that. And so. here I am now, you know, a voice for really ending the stigma. around mental illness. If you have a. proper diagnosis from a psychiatric from. a psychiatrist and you have that. psychiatric support, there is no shame in following the. medicated path. Yes, of course we live. in a culture where medication is overly.

prescribed and unnecessarily prescribed. and there are a lot of things you have. to know and educate yourself on when you. get on psychiatric medication, but when. you need it, you need it. Yeah. to survive. Yeah. And it is and it. is exactly what she said. That. medication created a safer baseline in. my system so I could unearth the deepest. deepest wounds and come out the other. side. Gabby, thank you so much. for sharing your soul in this book, in.

this episode. And what I love about this. book is that it has your story and your. journey. It has really practical tips and steps. for people to actually follow. And it. has these real methodologies and. approaches to guide them as well. And and I think it's masterful in the. way it's kind of like the tapestry of. all of that together. And I think what underpins it is just. your ability to go all the way and be so. vulnerable as you have been today in. today's episode, but in also in the.

book. And so if anyone who's listening, if you know for a long time you've been. shying away, you've been protecting. yourself, you've been putting it off, postponing it, you know it's there, maybe a physical. response is really triggering right now, maybe something that someone says is. pushing you over the edge, then please. go and grab a copy of Happy Days uh. today. The link is in uh the comment. section and everywhere else. And make.

sure you follow Gabby. Her podcast is. called Dear Gabby. Uh go and listen and. subscribe to the podcast. You can also. follow Gabby on social media across all. platforms, Gabby Bernstein. Uh make sure. you go and do that. Gabby, I want to. thank you from the bottom of my heart. for taking out the time to do this. because. I think you've made me ask so many. questions that I'm going to go back to. after this episode. I'm like, what do I. need to take a deeper look at? What What. have I really not worked through or what. am I avoiding or ignoring or putting. off?

And I'm just grateful for that. I'm. really grateful that you've given me the. space to do that. Uh given us all the. path to do that through this book. Thank. you for your presence and for seeing me. even when I couldn't see myself. And it's it's such a privilege to be. your friend. Thank you. Oh, thank you, Gabby. Thank you so much. Uh everyone. who's been listening and watching, make. sure you tag me and Gabby uh on your. post so that we know what resonated with. you, what connected with you. I just. want to point out that a lot of my. guests have said this to me recently, it. makes me very happy. Our On Purpose.

community is amazing and I've been. getting messages and speaking to a lot. of my friends who've been on the show. saying that they just felt the love, like the flood of love from our. community. So, please show that to Gabby. as well. Thank you for doing that for. all the other guests before. I wanted. you to know that I've been hearing about. you personally from so many people and. let's start living some happy days. So, take care everyone. Thank you so much. for listening. If you want even more. videos just like this one, make sure you. subscribe and click on the boxes over.

here. I'm also excited to let you know. that you can now get my book Think Like. a Monk from thinklikeamonkbook.com. Check below in the description to make. sure you order today.