Give Me 27 Minutes and I’ll End Your Perfectionism for Good (FINALLY Get Unstuck!)

You want to realize where you are is a. launchpad, not a trapdoor. Where you're. standing right now is going to propel. you forward, not pull you down. But when. we tell ourselves a story and a. narrative that where I am is the worst. place ever, it forces us to stay there. You're not stuck. You're stabilizing. That's a part of growth. You're not failing. You're getting feedback. that life didn't sugarcoat. The number.

one health and wellness podcast. >> Jay Shetty. >> Jay Shetty. The one, the only, Jay. Shetty. Hey everyone, welcome back to On. Purpose. I'm Jay Shetty, your host, and. I am so grateful that you've tuned back. in. If you're watching on YouTube, make. sure you've subscribed to this channel. so that you never miss a video. And if. you're listening to this on Spotify, Apple, iHeart, or wherever you get your. podcasts, make sure you subscribe as.

well. I don't want you to miss out on. the exciting guests and themes that we. have coming up later this year. Now, this episode is all about what to do. when you feel like nothing's working. I think we all go through moments in. life where it feels like everything and. everyone is against us. It can even feel. like the world is against us, right? Things aren't going our way. We're not. experiencing those moments of luck. Maybe you're always late for the bus.

The train's never on time. Your car's. breaking down. The kids having a really. tough time at school. Maybe you didn't. get the promotion you were working. towards. And what you're wondering is. what do I do when I feel like nothing's. working? And sometimes we get so. disheartened, we get so depressed, that. we don't even wonder that anymore. We. just assume that this is our life. This. is all it is, and this is how it will.

always be. If you feel stuck right now, this. episode is for you. If you feel like you're in a rut, or. you've hit rock bottom, this is for you. And if you're wondering how to build. momentum and get out of where you are, this episode is for you. I also want you to pass this on to. someone who might benefit from it, because I'm sure you have friends and. family and people reaching out all the. time. and saying, "Hey, if I'm honest with.

you, nothing's working out right now. Nothing's going in the right direction.". Before I jump in. to how do we address this, I want to. share something known as the frequency. illusion. Now, we've all experienced. this in our life. Think about it. Have you ever said to. yourself, "I really want to buy a red. car," or a certain make or model, and all of a sudden, all you see on the. roads is that car. Every single car is.

that color, every single car is that. model. Now, are there more of that car. on the road just at that moment in time? Are there suddenly more red cars on the. streets? The answer is no. The reality is the frequency illusion is. at play. Because you're consciously thinking. about something, you now see it appear. more than normal. We all do this. And whether it's a red car, or whether. it's slightly salmon colored, or whether.

it's slightly dark maroon, you still. think it's a red car. So, when you're. conscious of something, you frequently. see it. Therefore, if you believe that nothing's. working for you, you will notice all the. signs. that nothing's working for you. And if you believe that things are. moving in your favor, you will notice all the signs that. things are moving in your favor. I.

guarantee you there is someone you. smiled at yesterday and they smiled. back. But I also guarantee you there's. someone you looked at the other day, smiled, and they didn't smile back. What. you remembered was based on what you. noticed. What you notice becomes your. reality. You can either notice when. people help you, open the door, take a. step toward you, give you an. opportunity, or you can notice when they.

didn't open the door, when they shut it. in your face, or when there was no path. forward. What we notice becomes our reality. With that, I want to dive into point. one. Stop trying to feel motivated. This. is one of the biggest mistakes we all. make. We want to feel motivated. We want. to feel excited. We want to feel. enthusiastic. What I've learned very, very clearly. is that if you wait for motivation,

you'll be waiting a long, long time. People who make moves don't wait for. motivation. People who make progress. don't wait for motivation. Actually, they do things when they don't feel. motivated. That's the key to success. That's the key to discipline is doing. things when we don't feel motivated. Motivation is this myth. This myth that you need to feel ready to.

take action. Instead, we need to focus on building. momentum, triggering momentum. The truth is action creates motivation, not the other way around. A lot of us. think that I'll feel motivated, then. I'll take action. It's the other way. around. Take action and then you'll feel. motivated. Now, this idea is actually. backed by science. The Zeigarnik effect. shows that starting a task, even. imperfectly, creates mental tension that.

keeps us engaged until we finish. This. psychological principle, once you. understand it, will transform the way. you live. It will stop you from waiting. to feel ready. Here's how it works. Your. brain remembers unfinished tasks more. than finished ones. When you start. something, even just a little, your. brain creates a mental loop that stays. open. That tension makes you want to go.

back and complete it. That's why it's. easier to keep working after you've. started, but so hard to begin. Motivation kicks in after momentum, not. before. So, today, don't try to finish. the whole thing. Start badly. Start. briefly. All you have to do is set a. timer for 3 minutes, open the document, do one push-up, write one sentence. That's it. Because your mind will force.

you to go back to an unfinished task. If. a task is not yet begun, you won't have. motivation or momentum. Once the task is. begun, your mind and your brain are. somewhat committed to finish it. The. mistake we make is we say, "Well, I'm. going to do all of it today. I'm going. to finish the whole thing today.". And that becomes an insurmountable task. The weight is too heavy to carry. And we. end up dropping the ball and feeling.

like failures. So, the mistake we make. is we live in one of two extremes. I'm. going to do nothing. Or I can't do. anything because everything is against. me. Or I'm going to do everything. perfectly, brilliantly, completely. And. both of those mindsets set us up for. failure. Script one video. Post one. podcast. Just start. Once you start, the. Ziegarnik effect does the rest. Stop. looking for motivation.

Start small. Stop looking for perfection. Start messy. Stop waiting for clarity. Start moving. Stop waiting to be confident. Start. anyway. Stop waiting for the timing to feel. right. Start where you are. Because the time will never feel right. You'll never feel ready. Because you weren't meant to.

You were just meant to get going. Here's what I want you to do today. Pick. one small task you've been avoiding. Set a 5-minute timer. And just start. Don't aim to finish. Aim. to begin. Momentum will meet you there. Because. remember, the first thing you make. won't be great. The first video. might feel awkward. The first post might get ignored. The first idea.

might not land. The first time you put yourself out. there, you'll probably cringe. You'll overthink. it. You'll question yourself. You'll. wonder if it's even been worth it. But. remember this, the first thing you do. won't be the last. Keep going. You don't need motivation. You need. movement. Stop putting it off. Stop. postponing your dreams and your ideas.

and everything you want to do. All it does is put more pressure on it. All it does is make you watch others. who've already got started. The reason. why people are ahead of you is not. because they're better. It's because. they started earlier. Just let that sink. in for a moment. People just started. earlier. And what happens when people. start early? People judge, people. criticize. When people start to do. anything, everyone goes, "What's that? Don't really think it's going to be. worth it. Don't really think it's going. to work." You break through that by.

making movement. Step number two, break the brain loop. Here's what you. have to do. Do something pointlessly. physical. When everything else feels. stuck, your brain is usually stuck in. over-analysis and mental clutter. Moving. physically changes everything. This is. backed by science. Studies show that. repetitive physical actions, walking, cleaning, showering, activate the. default mode network, which improves.

problem-solving and calms mental noise. That's from Harvard Medical School in. 2015. So here, do this today. Fold. laundry, you got to do it anyway. Wash. the dishes, you got to do it anyway. Walk around the block. No phone, no. podcast, just you and the motion. Your. body can reset a stuck mind. Here's how. I think about it. When your mind is. stuck, move your body. And when your body is stuck, move your.

mind. It's the opposite. Sometimes we. get so stuck in our head and we're just. trying to figure it all out in our head. I'm sure you've had those moments of. crashing out. We just go round and round. in circles in your mind, negotiating, analyzing, feeling overwhelmed. Instead. of all of that, just move your body. I've heard this from people first hand. Whether you're stuck after a breakup, whether you're stuck because you didn't. get promoted, whether you're stuck. because you're feeling like you don't. have energy or you feel like you don't.

have motivation. The people who end up. at a kickboxing class, end up walking. around the block, end up going for a. run, end up hanging out with their. friend at the gym. Even just that act gets you out of that. rut. It makes you unstuck. You don't have to. wait for your mind to move. That's the mistake. If you're. overwhelmed, you're stuck in anxiety, don't wait for your mind to move. Start. moving your body. I'm not saying you've. got to go and become a bodybuilder. I'm. not saying you've got to go and lift the.

heaviest weights. I'm just saying that. whenever your mind feels slow, move your. body faster. Step number three. Woof, this one's a big one. This is the one. that is holding everyone back. Because the number one question I get. asked is. "Jay, when's the right time? Is it too. oversaturated now? Should I have started. 3 years ago? Like, what if I start in a. month? Will that be okay?" Stop waiting. for the right time. Stop waiting. Start.

before it feels safe. Stop waiting for the right time because. there isn't one. There isn't one. There's a beautiful. proverb that says. "The best time to plant a tree was 20. years ago, and the next best time is. today." Right? So, whatever you're. thinking about, those are the two. choices. Should you have started a. podcast 5 years ago? Yeah, probably. Should you have started that YouTube. channel 10 years ago? Probably. But. guess what? You didn't. And neither did.

I. The best time to start is now. That's. what you have. I remember when I started. to create content, which was in around. 2016, I was. 5 years behind the earliest YouTubers. And I remember everyone saying to me. that I was a bit late to that space. When I started my podcast, which was in. 2019, everyone said it was too. saturated. I think at that time there. were like 700,000 podcasts. I think. today there's 5 million. So, the point. is things are always going to be more.

saturated. Things are always going to be more. competitive. There are always going to. be more creators as time goes on. So, it's whether you want to start now when. there are 5 million podcasts or whether. you're going to wait 5 years when. there's 10 million podcasts, right? Which one's better? And so, there's no perfect time to. begin. That's a myth. The truth is the. right time is a feeling that shows up. after you start, not before. And this is. backed by science, too. The science. shows that people who take action before.

they feel ready develop greater. confidence through experience, not. preparation. This is the mistake we. make. We think I can prepare to avoid or. learning. Preparation's important. I'm not going. to take away from that. But experience. is incredible. It's an incredible. teacher. Your brain builds certainty. from doing, not from waiting. So, do. this today. Choose one thing you've been.

putting off. Instead of asking, "Is this the right. time?". ask, "What's one move I can make in the. next 10 minutes?". Send the email, record the draft, fill. out the form, take the first imperfect. step. Readiness is not a requirement. It's a result. Stop waiting. Time won't invite you. You have to show up anyway. We've been taught to wait for the right.

time, to wait until we're more qualified, until we have more money, more. confidence, more clarity, until the fear. goes away, until we're ready, until. someone gives us permission, until the. timing makes sense. But here's the reality. The right time doesn't show up. You do. The timing won't feel perfect because. you're not supposed to feel certain.

before you grow. We've been taught that good things come. to those who wait, but in real life, good things come to those who move, who. ask, who try, who don't wait for their. turn because they know no one's handing. it to them. Stop waiting for the right. time. I can't say it enough. Just stop. waiting. This idea that I'm going to. wait for miraculous alignment. I'm going. to time it in the perfect year. If. you're timing it for by the time that.

it's the perfect year, I promise you. everyone's going to be doing it that. year, right? Everyone's going to be. doing it that year because you've waited. for the perfect year, which means. everyone's going to feel it's the. perfect year, which by definition. creates more competition for you. Step. number three, a lot of us believe we've. got to get brilliance to make a. difference. And actually, persistence. beats talent and talented quitters. I'm. sure you've seen someone on TV before or.

on social media and thought, "How did. they make it? I'm more talented than them. I feel like I'm better than them at. that. How did they make it and I didn't?". Well, they didn't sit on the sidelines. They didn't quit. They kept going. when the talented people. stepped away, stepped back. The research shows that. students with less IQ, but higher grit, often outperformed. smarter, but less persistent peers.

In other words, deliberate, sustained. effort yielded stronger outcomes than. raw talent. Think about that for a second. There's no such thing as raw talent. being naturally gifted to be successful. if they don't have persistence. So, if you feel like your talent's at a. five out of 10, yeah, you should work on it. For sure, you should build it. But, if your. consistency is at a 10 out of 10,

that's going to average out as seven and. a half. But, let's say someone's talent. is a nine out of 10, but their. commitment, their consistency is a two. out of 10, well, then you're going to break that. down to a five and a half. They're two points behind you because of. the average. So, stop waiting to feel. good enough. Stop waiting to feel. talented enough. Stop waiting to feel. like you're the best in the game. There's a beautiful quote by Zig Ziglar.

that I love. You don't have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great. Right? This idea that I have to be great. when I start, I have to have a video. that goes viral, I have to have a book. that sells a million copies right off. the bat, that's the pressure we're. putting on ourselves. And we're all becoming paralyzed by the. pressure of perfection instead of making. progress and being consistent and. finding our genius within that. One.

thing I want to address here is this. myth of you missed your window. How many. times have you ever had that experience. and you feel. I missed my chance. That could have been me. I could have been happily married now. I should have had that career. I missed my time. Didn't work. Ah, well, I don't I just. I I wish I didn't I wish I didn't give. up then. Here's the truth.

That was the myth. Life rarely moves in straight lines. There are always new entry points. A. Yale study on non-linear careers found. that people who start later in life. often outperform early starters in. long-term fulfillment and career. satisfaction. You didn't miss your shot. You just needed to stop aiming at. someone else's timeline.

Think about that. You didn't miss your shot. You just. needed to stop aiming at someone else's. timeline. You didn't miss your chance. You just needed to stop focusing on. someone else's deadline. You didn't miss your opportunity. You just needed to stop focusing on. other people's doors. One of my favorite quotes is from Imam. Al Shafi. He said, "My heart is at ease knowing.

what was meant for me will never miss. me. And that which misses me. was never meant for me.". What missed you was never for you. And what is for you will never miss you. We have to recognize that where we are. and what we've experienced and the. talents and the skills you have and the. resilience you have and the grit you. have is the exact cocktail that you need. to create the future that you want. So,

I want you to start labeling the fog. differently. Name what's actually missing. People say, "I feel stuck.". But what they really mean is, "I'm. overwhelmed. I'm afraid to fail. I'm. comparing myself to everyone." Right? I'm sure you can relate. The process of affect labeling shows. that naming emotions reduces activity in. the amygdala and restores prefrontal. cortex function, aka clear thinking. So,

here's what I want you to do today. Open your notes app or journal and. complete the sentence. Right now, I feel. stuck because. then ask, is this about clarity, confidence, or control? You can't fix what you won't name. So, when we say things like, "I'm just. stuck.". Imagine you were driving down a road. and your maps went off because you lost. Wi-Fi, you lost data, and you end up and you're like, "Okay,

I'm stuck.". Cool. How helpful is that information? Not at all. Not at all, right? But, if you're like, "Hey, I'm at the intersection. of this road and this road. I can see a. hotel on my right-hand corner. It's got. this name." Okay, let me think about. where am I facing? Let me right? It's. it's much better to label it. It's much. better to know. If you manage to get. some reception back, you could know. where you were, you could place where. you were. And so, labeling your emotions.

is so important and you can't fix what. you won't name. The next step is make peace. with the plateau. You're not broken. You're in between growth spurts. Neuroscience shows that periods of. frustration or boredom often precede. breakthroughs. This is when the brain. reorganizes for deeper learning. So, here's what I want you to do today. Ask. yourself, what's the skill or mindset.

I'm being forced to build right now? Here's how I view my entire life. I literally ask myself, what is the. skill I'm missing. between where I am and where I want to. be? There's just a skill. Could be. public speaking. Could be negotiation. Could be communication. If you want a. promotion and you're not getting it, what is the skill you're missing? Is the. skill networking? Is the skill. relationship building? Is the skill. presenting skills, right? What is it? Often, we don't think it's a skill, we. think it's working harder. We think it's.

impressing someone. We think it's making. ourselves look better. What's the skill? Then write three ways this stuck season. might be strengthening you. You want to. realize where you are is a launchpad, not a trapdoor. Where you're standing. right now is going to propel you. forward, not pull you down. But when we. tell ourselves a story and a narrative. that where I am is the worst place ever,

it forces us to stay there. You're not stuck. You're stabilizing. That's a part of growth. You're not broken. You're piecing things back together in a. new way. You're not lost. You're stepping away. from parts that weren't for you. You're not stuck. You're learning to sit. still with yourself. You're not behind. You're moving at the speed of healing. You're not failing. You're getting.

feedback. that life didn't sugarcoat. You're not weak. You're stretched and. still standing. You're not falling apart. You're undoing. what was never meant to last. You're not confused. You're finally. seeing things clearly, even if it hurts. You're not empty. You're unlearning the. noise that used to fill the void. You're not too late.

You're right where your next chapter. starts. Next step, shrink the vision, save the dream. Stuckness often comes from thinking too. big all at once. A lot of people say. think big. Have a big goal, have a big. vision. I'm not against that if that. works for you, but I think there are two. types of people. People who work well. with a big dream, and people who work. well with a small step. Know which one. you are. Some people are more motivated.

when they know they're working towards. something huge. Some people are more. motivated when they know they're working. towards something small. Because to some people the big thing is. overwhelming and scary, and to some. people the small thing is boring and. irrelevant. Have self-awareness. Research on gold gradients shows that. people are more likely to keep going. when they see quick early wins. Your. brain needs small amounts of proof and.

evidence. That's what it's looking for. Your brain needs small proofs. So, do. this today. Instead of asking what my purpose is, ask what's one thing I can finish today. that moves me an inch closer to where I. want to go. Then do it. Shrink the goal. Don't shrink yourself. Stop feeling the pressure to do. something big. Start with small steps.

Start by making your bed. Start by. answering one email. Start by drinking a. glass of water. Start by writing the. first sentence. Start by getting through. the next hour, not the whole year. Start. with what's in front of you, not what's expected of you. Start small enough that you can't make. excuses. Start often enough that it becomes who. you are.

Because big things don't begin big. They begin. when you do. I really hope that this episode landed. with you. I hope it inspires you to make a change. in your life. I'm so excited to hear about all the. things you started because of this. episode. Tag me on Instagram. Tag me on. TikTok. I love seeing your clips. I love. seeing your posts. I want to see what. you started because of this episode, and. I can't wait to see where it goes 5.

years from now, 10 years from now, 15. years from now to see the incredible. things that you achieve. Remember, I'm. forever in your corner, and I'm always. rooting for you. I'll see you soon. If. this is the year that you're trying to. get creative, you're trying to build. more, I need you to listen to this. episode with Rick Rubin on how to break. into your most creative self, how to use. unconventional methods that lead to. success, and the secret to genuinely. loving what you do. If you're trying to. find your passion and your lane, Rick.

Rubin's episode is the one for you. Just. because I like it, that doesn't give it. any value. Like, as an artist, if you. like it, that's all of the value. That's. the success comes when you say, "I like. this enough for other people to see it.".