How to Survive Bear Attacks & Quicksand

if you have plans to be attacked by a. bear a shark or anything else make sure. you watch this first I'm Loretta from. New. Jersey let's talk about. [Music]. [Applause]. that good mythical morning this episode. is brought to you by the allnew Rett. link.com that's our website completely. redesigned for your viewing and. interactive pleasure please check it out. and comment over there where's that at.

Rett and link.com that's a good website. name now Land Rover is a famous uh brand. of vehicles link you know about Land. Rover they have a redesigned website. landrover.com know lots of people. recognize Land Rover as like the perfect. car for a survivalist however I kind of. see it as the perfect car for a woman. with a lot of plastic surgery in Los. Angeles because that too I see driving. Land Rovers I've seen lot of this it's. good for getting into steep driveways in. the Hollywood Hills that's what uh Land.

Rovers are good for but apparently they. have a reputation for being the perfect. vehicle for a survivalist somebody who's. just going to go get into some mess. somewhere and in the United Arab. Emirates which is a country in the. Middle East yes it is the Land Rover. customers now with every Land Rover they. get according to a late news. story they get a survival guide on how. to survive certain situations that also. has edible. Pages what it has edible pages in The. surv rival guide and they have as many.

calories as a. cheeseburger so you so you can eat you. just got an alert on your iPad to pay a. credit card yeah two of them actually. I'm glad make sure you do that I will. that's why there's an alert a key for. our survival is that you pay our. corporate credit card but so it's like a. manual for how to fix the Land Rover but. it's how to fix your life if you're in a. situation where you need to survive and. part of the fixing of your life when. you're in that situation is 0 the manual.

itself well I think surviving and fixing. your life are kind of the same thing. staying staying alive yeah I I use that. those terms interchangeably but as I was. only certain pages are editable like. editable no edible do not eat this page. do not eat this page and then all of a. sudden eat this page all the pages are. Ed with white out you can edit all the. pages but you can only Ed a few of the. pages okay but as I was looking at this. edible I got to be pretty in a dire. situation if I'm going to eat a manual. welled.

edible on it it has flavor we should. call Land Rover and see if we can get. hold of some of these we'll do that. later um but it made me think how. prepared am I do I need a guide like. this how prepared am I and so I actually. went to a few websites one of them was. Discovery Channel Discovery Channel has. all kinds of information about surviving. in all these different places so I'm. going to read out some situations that. you might find yourself in okay and I. want you to tell me what you would do. and then I'm going to tell you what you. should actually do now I'm glad you're. asking me this because as many of you. know I survived high school without.

getting beat up and I I talked a lot of. trash so I i' like to consider myself a. survivalist of sorts anyway not related. I'm I'm talking about that kind of thing. a total editable survivalist that's me. everybody knows one of the first things. that you should do when you find. yourself lost and you're going to have. to spend the night in a hostile. environment outside is you need to build. a shelter Now. link what is the most common mistake. made in building a temporary shelter.

digging a. hole because if it rains you. drown no that's not true it's actually. making it too small too large people. make them too large especially when. you're in a cold climate the hole no the. shelter the shelter needs to be tight. and it needs to be around you so it will. trap your body heat that's called that's. called a sleeping bag no no it's but you. need to be able to get around and do. things in there like make little fires. and cook and catch things and bring them. in there yes they need to make it big no. just big enough to build a fire in it.

well you might want to build don't make. it too big because body heat body heat. now what's the first thing you should. don't dig a hole because you drown in it. that's not true actually in the desert. you should dig a hole and then cover it. doesn't rain in the desert but if it. does it's a flash flood and guess what. buddy you'll drown then I think you'll. have time to get out what's the first. thing you do speaking of water when your. car lands in water what's the first. thing you should do uh roll your windows. up well the second thing first thing do. hold your breath.

uh the first thing you should do is you. should unfasten your seat belt and then. hold your breath nope you should. unfasten your seat belt because you. would not believe how many people could. have gotten out of of a car that was. sinking and then were like buckled up. this is creeping me out man so as soon. as you hit the water unbuckle your seat. belt and then the next thing you should. do before the car shorts out is you. should roll your windows down are you. you were you just joking wait so you can. become a ballast you'll sink to the. bottom you're filled with you're going. to sink to the bottom.

regardless a lot faster no what happens. is if you leave the windows up you sink. and then the pressure the external. pressure is so great on the outside of. the car that you there no human the Hulk. couldn't even get out of the car or. break a window because the pressure is. so high so you roll down the window down. so you you have an escape hat and then. you get out because the door won't open. with the pressure either you can't open. the door forget opening the door I have. a sick feeling even thinking about this. happening well that's the thing I'm. going to break this to you now right.

after this episode I'm going to go drive. a car with you in it into the LA River. and you have to put all this into. practice well I you'll just hit concrete. because there's no water in it yeah. it'll be like you're driving in a big. ditch so roll your windows down and then. if you happen to not roll your windows. down you cannot kick the window out it. is impossible to kick the window out you. have to take a sharp object and bust one. of your side windows not the back window. not the windshield because those are. thicker bust a side window with a sharp. object or a blunt object like a.

flashlight anything hard that can kind. of break the glass and go for the corner. okay you're going to live because of. this stuff you can do it you can live. I'll be there with you now if you happen. to find yourself in the middle of a. field during a thunderstorm with. lightning and I'm talking a Big Field. you cannot get out of the field okay. like we're talking an endless field say. the desert the desert is not a field. well let's say it's a desert it's. raining and you you built your hole. you're not drowning in your hole You. Haven't built your hole yet all right. thunderstorm comes up I'm in a and I'm.

an expans what do you do there's no. shelter what position should you get in. let's I'm going to make it a little bit. easier for. you jump up and down repeatedly until. the storm passes because that. drastically increases your chances of. being in the air when it strikes and. then it won't strike. you that's it's a good idea that's a. horrible idea if you have a rope you can. jump that um if not simulate jumping R. whatever you do do not lie flat on the. ground that is the worst thing that you.

could do because it's going to create a. huge contact between you and the ground. and your all the lightning is just going. to hit and go through all your your. entire body you should get you won't be. tall you should Crouch down on the balls. of your feet with your feet together to. minimize your contact with the ground. and put your hands over your ears to. protect yourself from acoustic shock so. you get down like. that he's he's down on the balls of his. feet with his hands over his that's the. that's the thunderstorm position okay. give me another one I I think I'm doing. pretty well I could write an alternate.

Survival Guide to all of this stuff. you've missed all of them so far how do. most people survive I mean how do most. people die in quick s um they roll their. windows down they're in a car. right do you know that it is impossible. for a person to become completely. submerged in quick quicksand that is a. movie myth you it most at most you can. sink to just above your waist now if. you're alone and you sink to just above. your waist you're going to die so. everyone who dies in quicksand dies of. dehydration and or starvation ooh it.

isn't from getting sucked up in the sand. and so the way to prevent that when you. find yourself in quick sand cuz I know. this is going to happen to you you lean. back as you're going as you fall in you. lean back and then you move your feet in. circular motions just like you're. brushing your teeth you know circular I. don't brush my teeth with my feet and. your feet will slowly rise to the top. and then you'll be laying on there and. you can roll over be back floating okay. now we're going to talk about animals. because animals attack uh let's say. floating in the ocean with some comp.

companions after your boat sinks what. are some ways to avoid being attacked by. sharks P urinating is one of the worst. things that you could do if you must. only do so in small amounts let it. dissipate between discharges you know. you're dehydrated go right into your. mouth and if you must defecate if you. must defecate do so in small amounts and. throw it as far away from you as. possible I'd do that anyway in all. circumstances I'm like a chimpan a. monkey throwing his.

okay now other than rainwater and. condensation what is a freshwater Source. while lost at sea you're in a raft. you're at Sea you're dying of thirst. can't drink the water in the ocean. everybody knows that what can you do. where else can you get water and it's. not your own peace I don't say. that you're not supposed to drink your. urine that's a trick question I can't. come up with any other drink the aquous. fluid found along the spine and the eyes. of large fish. carefully cut the fish in half to get.

the fluid along the spine and suck the. eye if you are so short of water that. you need to do this then do not drink. any of the other body fluids these. fluids are rich in protein and fat and. will use up more of your reserve water. in digestion than they Supply okay now. we're going to talk about a few animals. that you might get attacked by what do. you do if you're being attacked by a. hungry monkey um throw his feces back at. him you could do that but you can also. do the open mouth threat make an o with. your mouth and lean forward and raise. your eyebrows monkey will be scared out.

of their minds do I have to make a. noise that's what I would do I would. make a monkey sound back at. them sound like Crow and now uh. crocodiles and alligators what's how do. what what do you do when your zigzag. pattern that is false forget the zigzag. thing that that that's a myth they say. that in that in that survival book but a. Discovery Channel they say well actually. I think this is somewhere else we'll put. the source up they say forget anything. you've heard about zigzagging just leg. it just run they cannot run that fast.

they can run pretty fast but just go. just get away as fast as you can and if. they do happen to get hold of you try to. stick your thumb into its eye oh just go. for the eyeballs and then if you're. really thirsty you can drink the eyeball. once you kill it and lastly this is the. most interesting one as far as I'm. concerned I already know the answer to. bear attacks what okay I'm going to talk. about three different types of bears. what do you do if you're being attacked. by a grizzly grizzly bear uh take your. shirt off hold it above your head to. make yourself look like a huge be that.

is incorrect when you're being attacked. by a grizzly bear first thing you should. do if he's making aggressive moves you. should just stand straight up and back. away very slowly do not panic back away. very slowly but if he attacks you anyway. you play dead grizzly bear you play dead. you don't fight back at all you play. dead like just go limp and eyes roll. back rag doll what do you do if you're. being attacked by a black bear call the. grizzly. bear. that makes sense you fight back with.

Grizzly with with black bears first of. all you want to get you want to get big. and. crazy you want to get as. big make as many crazy noises as you can. hold on that's your that's what your. characterization of fighting back no no. no I'm not fighting crazy I'm not. fighting he's just about to attack. me and then he's he'll be intimidated. and then if he begins to attack you just. go crazy on him just fight him back with. everything you got and lastly oh you got.

another one what do you do if you're. being attacked by a polar bear just. speak gently hey man be cool be cool. Daddyo no you give him a. Coca-Cola that's a joke I'm spinning the. wheel don't don't take the L actually. you die you die there's really nothing. you can do there is a video on YouTube. of a guy scaring off a polar bear with a. stick but typically once it starts it's. over buddy you're dead speaking of which. rat shrinks and Link grows that's how. we're ending this episode good mythical.

morning thanks for joining us today oh. what's this on the table it says eat me. and yours says drink me do I grow or do. I get you grow. okay. oh link you're getting so big I'm going. to have to get look at how tall I am I'm. going to have to move away to make a. force perspective oh I'm going to good. I'm so tall look how small I you can.

hold me in your hand I'm like a little I. can see everything from up here oh look. how small I am thanks for calling L this. is Tony yeah Tony I'm wondering if you. guys have any of those edible survival. guides edible survival guides yeah they. come in the Land Rovers now.