Food Court Nightmare

I went to the food court and did. something I think I need to apologize. for let's talk about that hi I'm. Jonathan I'm Ellie I'm Hannah I'm Josh. and we're from Frederick Maryland Good. Mythical. [Music]. Morning Good Mythical Morning this. episode is brought to you by ca.com. that's the guys with the goods including. a complaint department please take a.

number grenade psych it's a coffee M. don't pull that though don't pull it all. the way out it'll still explode I don't. think so probably shouldn't even say. that it's just a joke okay empty right. now um well I went to the food court uh. this past weekend and I had some things. happen there that I feel like uh we need. to talk about and I feel like there's. somebody out there that to address to.

the tone that you're taking in this is. the tone that a boss takes cons. conciliatory when an employee when he. ask an employee into his office and S. and is going to fire him or reprimand. it's like um something has come to my. attention that I'd like for you to take. a seat here so that we can talk about. how did you know that I was going to. fire you today this is not about well. you don't have that power my friend but. this is not about me is it I think I do. look at the corporate book I'm not I'm. not going to be we have a corporate book. yep see no for the record I know that we.

do if the lawyers are watching we both. know about the corporate book okay and. it's all filled out appropriately but. I'm not going to be reprimanded here. this is not going to be about me not. about you it's about me okay good it's. about me and a certain special someone. out there okay um we'll get into it okay. I took um the boys out I have two boys. lock and Shephard they're children. they're my sons I took them out uh on uh. Saturday night uh to go shopping for.

Mom for Valentine's Day and uh Jesse was. having some ladies over here at the. house and I felt like this would be a. good opportunity to do this and I was is. she like playing back gaming or. something Bridge no she wasn't it was. just some women like retired ladies I. don't I don't ask them what they do they. just you know have us a good time. whatever but I I said you know what I've. got to do shopping which a I don't like. to do B I know my kids don't like to do. so I'm going to try make this a fun.

experience for the boys I call it boys. night I call it boys night hey it's boys. night they're like night but you did. shopping you didn't shop you did. shopping well yeah we did some shopping. and I was like you know what's going to. make this great for the family is if we. go and we eat somewhere that the kids. want to eat and then I get over there to. the cuz none of them want to go shopping. for Mom oh no but we all want to eat I. go over there to the Glendale uh. Galleria Americana you know that area.

over there MH and uh I'm like U. well let me let me get on Yelp and see. if there's some place that you know we. all enjoy and I couldn't find anything. and I got frustrated and then I said. well I'll just go to the food court. because at the the at the mall you got. the food court you got the options. everybody can be. happy so I go in there and first of all. as I'm always I I I never cease to be. amazed by the number of people in this. town you can't go anywhere at any time. and not just be totally in a huge crowd.

I thought you were going to say I never. ceased to be amazed at the number of. people in this town that blah blah blah. BL love the food court well first of all. the food court had a section that they. were working on so they had less seating. than normal and I go in there and I look. under construction and I see people one. person at a b no open tables and a bunch. of people like waiting with a cell phone. at a table like holding reserving a. table at the food court waiting for. other people and I was like that is. Despicable man this is going to be a. nightmare so then I'm like like people.

holding spots at a food court yeah lots. of people I'm I'm talking hundreds of. people just on cellular telephones like. I found a table George get over here get. your kungpow chicken and get over here. you know now that makes me angry I mean. it's like especially if I'm with my kids. which is uh you know it's a high. pressure situation I would be totally. prepared at that point to say once I get. my food I'm sitting down with somebody. who's eating nothing but a cell phone. it's like oh you're eating your cell. phone no you're just on well then get up.

well I knew that I couldn't employ this. technique because I've got children with. me you I can't put shepher a. four-year-old there with a cell phone he. doesn't even know how to use it he'd be. like playing a game on it oh you were. going to play their game if you could. I'm saying you're supposed to crash I. wasn't going to do it I knew I wasn't. even it wasn't even in the cards I. couldn't even do it okay so I had to. have a different strategy but strategy. one is what are we going to eat and so. I'm like okay I look around I'm like my. kids are really picky I know they're not. going to want to do one of these Asian. things and first of all like at every. food court half it's like something a.

gred was look at all these Asian things. half of the options are Asian food have. you noticed this like food courts love. Japanese Chinese Korean and then Asian. fusion or cajan which I I'm pretty sure. s it at least rhymes with Asian it does. Asian Cajun and there's actually an. Asian Cajun place in North Carolina you. know that place yeah what are they. thinking I think it's just Cajun but. we're just mistaken and so I'm like that. almost rhymed I'm thinking well okay.

what am I going to do pizza kids love. pizza so I take them up to the little. pizza place it's not a sabaro and uh I. show them the pizza and I'm like boys. doesn't that look good and I look at. both of them and there's like lots of. toppings on the pizza and they're both. like oh and then they see a McDonald's. sign oh yeah and I'm like okay trust and. then Shepherd's like I want to go to. McDonald's I want a cheeseburger and. listen I know there's just parents out. there that they don't let their kids eat. McDonald's and just all natural and. stuff like that listen this is boy night. no rules we're going to do what we can. and if my my four-year-old wants a.

cheeseburger Happy Meal that's what he's. going to get and so I go over there and. like says well I don't want to go to. McDonald's I want to go to Subway and. I'm like I don't want to go to either. place I want to go I I want to go to. this Japanese place over here I want to. go to the Asian place because there's so. many Asian options yeah so I'm like okay. we got to play play this right so we go. to the McDonald's first we get a Happy. Meal with a toy a little Transformer toy. it's a two-part toy which I know that. spells trouble to begin with now I've. got a four-year-old with a cheeseburger. and a toy that has two parts just tell. him he's got two toys look two toys well.

then he loses one and he's lost he loses. half of it and he's lost the whole Toy. that's a bad idea so then I'm like okay. all right I'm going we get that and I. hold on to the little uh Happy Meal I'm. walking around with a Happy Meal because. I not going to let who knows what'll. happen if I actually give it to Shepherd. ahead of time right and so might find a. bar sit down order a drink and he eat. his happy meal and so then I go over to. the subway and I'm like lock what do you. want he's like I want a buffalo chicken. on a Italian with cheddar cheese and.

bacon like that he's that's that's what. he wanted he's he. toasted so I'm like well this is like. the lock communicating telepathically. with them like no it's just this is sort. of symbolic of he's really thought about. this so I go up there and I'm like okay. 6 in Italian buffalo chicken with. cheddar with cheddar cheese and bacon. they kind of look at us like okay and. then then they toast it and they bring. it out and they're like what do you want. on he's like nothing just just like that.

no toppings it just fold it up and they. give it to him like okay he's happy now. we got to find a seat because I've got. to order my food and I'm like I can use. my kids as like a marker and put them. down and let them start eating and then. go to a place that's close to their. table and like keep one eye on them at. least they do have food so they could. eat right and save you a seat here's the. problem still no available seating. however I look at the far door next to. the entrance you can come right in from. the outside there's an entrance to the.

outside right there at the end of the. food court down this little hallway area. and it's freezing outside and the doors. keep opening so there's this draft. coming in nobody's sitting there I'm. like that's our seat or that's your kid. seat so I go and I set lock and sheeper. down at this drafty table I'm like put. your coats on boys and start eating and. then I'm like I'm going to this Japanese. place over here that's you know within. 50 yards of here and at this moment 50. yards when I'm about to sit him down. this is where I need to apologize to. somebody a little flustered okay I'm a.

little flustered I've got a Happy Meal. in my hand Lock's got his crazy Subway. sandwich and I'm trying to figure out. where I'm going to eat and where they're. going to sit and a guy says RH he's. sitting down eating and a guy recognizes. RH from R link and I'm. like yeah and I'm really frustrated with. the whole situation yeah and then I'm. like nice to meet you now I'm usually. now if you see us in public and you and. and you like what we do and you want to. say hey come come up and say hey we'll.

get a picture it'll be a great time. usually now you sir I don't know your. name cuz I didn't ask it because I was. frustrated I was flustered and I just. said yeah and then I said nice to meet. you I probably didn't even smile I think. you missed an opportunity here that guy. was your food court babysitter you were. about to leave your kids 50 yards away. at an exit while you went to the. Japanese he a stranger though he's just. a stranger he's a fan you know he's a. mythical Beast you know you can't trust. all of them no and he look like he was. on a of some kind anyway I don't want to.

screw up his date Mak him babysit sure. lose your kids via the exit to the food. court or you know it's it's neither here. nor there and so you sir I apologize for. that next what did you say to him I mean. was there a rude look on your face like. I just know that I was get away I know I. was short with him I could feel it I. could feel myself being uh Kurt and I. don't mean your cousin I mean you know. yeah C short and I um so I apologize for. that but anyway I said down I go to the.

Japanese plate I kind of I keep one eye. on the Japanese food being made and I. keep one eye on my kids and they're very. obviously they're like shivering eating. over there I'm like it's good for them. they're going to learn something from. this no one tries to kidnap them I get. my food I go over there and I finish my. meal I gotta say I didn't enjoy I didn't. enjoy this it didn't sound like you have. and then Shephard loses the one half of. the toy that he got he did and cries for. 10. minutes the best dad in in the.

world it's you know it's I'm still angry. about the people holding seats with just. the cell phones I was angry from that. point and the frustration just built for. me but when I take my kids somewhere. yeah it's just it's a building. frustration of just oh I can I keep this. together I would never take him to a. food and you got an extra kid yeah I've. got one more K you wear him on like a. backpack or something don't you well I. put one of them in a backpack sometimes. and I but I've never done the leash. thing yeah Le shouldn't leas your kids.

now if I took my kids to that food court. you know what I would do I would say all. right kids you see that guy with the. plate those are samples and then if you. look there's another guy with samples. there's a girl with samples there's a. girl with samples we're going to form a. single file line and we're going to get. us some samples and that's it and by the. time we go around once the people the. first sample Giver will have forgotten. that we got a sample and we're going to. go through again you just Chang the. order you put Lando in front the next. time yep yep it just maybe maybe I bring. masks or some sort of costuming you get.

a sample dinner yeah sample dinner. totally free you get your exercise at. the same time and that's what I would. have done and you teach your kids how to. take advantage of the system and fans. would have been like le le and I'd have. been like yo yo hey guys hey take a. photo you know everything would have. been great but that's just me that's. what I would have. done Rhett announces he's leaving good. mythical morning for a new career all. right thanks for joining us you know I. feel like we're about to turn a corner.

yeah in Awesomeness with this show let. me tell you about it we're about to turn. a corner literally I'm going to start. Bob. sleding I uh like what what it I didn't. know how to say this and I just fig I. just need to be right out there with you. on this because I got asked to be the. anchor for the uh Jamaican uh. bobsledding team because as I've. established before I'm actually half. Jamaican and uh I've always expected. that I might get this call I got the. call it's a dream of mine but it's. unfortunately it's going to mean that we.

got to shut this thing down now there's. an opening for the second guy in the Bob. slid because he has have no skill at all. he can he just sits there and so I. thought you could do. that well the way I see it there's also. an opening here for a guy who just sits. here. [Music].