Bacon Outlawed!

- Link? - Yeah? - Do you know what day it is? - (whispering) It's Thursday. - Uh, I couldn't hear that. I'm a puppet. Talk to the guy behind me. - Hi, I'm Claire. and this is my boyfriend Alejandro, and we are from Washington state. Good Mythical Morning! (upbeat music playing). ♪ There are seven days in the week ♪.

♪ Each is special in its own way ♪. ♪ But there's one day that never fails ♪. ♪ You know what day it is? ♪. ♪ Its Thursday ♪. ♪ And Thursdays Means Mail ♪.

(guitar strumming). (Link laughing). - Okay. You done? Do it again. Just get it out of your system. (guitar strumming). Oh.

Thank you, Rhett. We have a PO box. You can send stuff to the PO box and it comes to us. We're gonna read some of that stuff, but let me first say. this episode is brought to you by the Rhett and Link store. where you can purchase stuff from us. and we mail it to you. It could pass in the mail. They would see each other and wave. "Oh, look. I'm going to Rhett and Link's house.". Or whatever we call it. PO box. We don't have a house. "Oh, I'm going from Rhett and Link's house.". - The post office.

- "Look at us, we're going different ways. but it's like traffic, but it's mail.". - Hmm. We got some mail. Some items in the mail. One of the items came from Ruthie and Deborah. - I've heard of them. - You know what they do, Link? They write books. Well, they wrote a book. - There it is right there. - And it's called "Rhett and Link and the End of the World.". Now I'm not gonna read the whole book. We can show maybe a picture or two. - To yourself you're going to read it, right? - Yeah. Well, I've already read it.

But I love the way that we're illustrated. - [Link] That's cool. - [Rhett] And very slimming. the way that they went about drawing us. But the thing that is very interesting. about this book, Link, is the fact that they wrote about us going into a hole, a black hole, that sends us into another world that we get stuck in. But then we realize that the Mythical Time Capsule. is somehow in this other world. And we put this book in the Mythical Time Capsule. which then allows us to figure out. how to back from that world to this world.

So the point that I'm trying to make here, or the point that Ruth and Deborah are trying to make, is that we need to put this book. into our Mythical Time Capsule. so that when we get taken to this other world, we can get back. - Very meta. - Yeah, it's very simple too. - I'm actually confused by it. but the artwork is pretty awesome. Thanks for sending that Ruthie and Deborah. So it's going in the Mythical Time Capsule. unless the Mythical Time Capsule is too small. - Rubeast from... Ruby. Not Rubeast. Ruby from Penn Yan, New York.

sent us some paper clips configured to spell our name. I don't know if you can read that. but that says "Rhett," that says "And,". that says "Link". And I've been needing paperclips. - You can't take it from there. - There you go. I can collate and clip things now if we get desperate. I'm not gonna dismantle your artwork. unless I get really desperate, Ruby. Thank you for that. It'll go on the bulletin board back here. - Now, Mark. Mark's the one that sent these wallets, right? So Mark made us wallets out of some sort of...

- Duct tape. - Penguin decorated duct tape. And he preloaded the wallets with a card. Mine's a joker. Yours says "Problem?". - "Problem?". - And then one Pokemon card. which I don't know how to play Pokemon, really. I just know that you've got more HP points than me. - 70. I got 70. - So you probably win if it's like a one on one thing. - Blaine's Tauros. - But I will say, Mark did the right thing.

My wallet is significantly bigger than Links. So I'm glad you were thinking about... - [Link] Well, I am more miserly. I'll be the first to admit that. Katie from Mountain Home, Arkansas. gave us a number of things, including a flute which I think that she made this herself. She handcrafted this flute. (flute whistling). - What makes you think that?

Hold on a second. You know what that might go good with? - I think you need to play an A for this to work. (guitar strumming). (flute whistling). - I trust that Jason edited that last five minutes.

of us playing out and spared you. All of that. She also sent us Smencils. Gourmet scented pencils. made from 100% recycled newspapers. So they all smell like dirty newspapers. All right, I'm going to get you to guess. what you think this one is. Smell it. - Lemon. - "Sort-of Soda" is what that one is called. Let's go with another one. I'll go with one that's easier.

Ooh, I think you'll like this one. If I can get it to come out. You're just gonna have to smell down the down the tube. That's not tasteful. What's it smell like? - Berries. - Nope. Try again. - Bubble gum. - It's got the word "bear" in it. - Gummy bears. - Gummy bears. That's right. - I put that up my nose. - It smells like the end of your nose. - Is that all we got? - That's all the mail we got. - We're kind of short on mail.

- There are some other things, but you know, this is what we thought was worth talking about. So send this stuff to our PO box. We'll talk about it. if it's a conversation piece. And it wouldn't be an episode of Thursday Means Mail. without a completely unrelated episode of Time Rangerers. (thrilling music playing). - Time Rangerers! - Hey, man. - Hey. - What you doing? - Just shopping it up, man. What about you?

- Well, I've been thinking. Ever since we accidentally killed your uncle's friend, you know the guy who was gonna vent the gazebo? - Yeah. - Now we don't have a time machine. and we can't travel in time. And life really sucks! - Yeah, I know. I've been pretty down too. Matter of fact, that's why I'm here in the grocery store, buying the one substance that can make me happy. - What's that? - Bacon. - Oh man. - Hey, you want to go in on, like, a lot of bacon? - You mean like a couple of pounds or something? - Yeah, let's do that. Let's head on over to the meat section over there. - Over there? - Yeah. Over there.

- Okay, let's go. - Mmm. Meat. - Hey, Mr. Worker At Grocery Store. - [Worker] Yes? - You got any bacon? - [Worker] Bacon? Isn't that outlawed. since the Bacon Prohibition Act of 1972? - What? - What? - Not only have we eliminated the invention of the gazebo. and therefore our personal time travel machine. we have created a ripple in the space time continuum.

that resulted in the prohibition of bacon! Link! This is horrible. - Crap, man! Let's get out of here. (somber music). Hey, now that we're out front of the grocery store, look over there. - Over there? - Nah, over there. - Over there? - Yeah. - I see that. - It's a bounce house. You know, like a kid's house. where they bounce in there for parties and whatnot? - I love that kind of thing, yeah. - Maybe going in that will cheer us up a little bit. - It's our only hope. Let's go.

- Let's check it out. - Wow, look. Whoa, whoa! I'm having so much fun! Whoa, it's a bouncy bouncy house! - Rhett? - Yeah? - This, my friend, is no ordinary bounce house. - What do you mean? - This... is a time machine. - How do you know that? - Well, like I said, I can look and tell when things are time machines. and this is one of those. - How does it work? - Well, we just jump up and down in unison. and it takes it somewhere. It's not very exact because it's a bounce house,

but it'll take it somewhere. - Okay, let's do it. - One, two, three. Whee! - Here we go. - Whoa. - Wow! Where are we? - You know what? This looks a lot like 1869 Promontory Point, Utah. - Really? - Yeah. - You mean the place where. the Transcontinental Railroad was connected? - Yeah. - Oh look. It looks like they're doing a ceremony over there. - Over there? - Yeah, over there. Let's go check it out. - Okay.

- Hey look, there's President Ulysses S. Grant. It looks like he's about to drive the final stake. Is it called a stake? - I think so. A spike. A railroad spike. - Trying to put that last spike in there. - Excuse me, President Grant? Would you mind if I held the final railroad spike. as you drive it in. to finish the Transcontinental Railroad? - [President Grant] No problem, son. - Okay, here you go. - [President Grant] Here I go. In three, two, one. (Rhett screaming). - No, he got my thumb!

It's kind swollen. - Don't panic. I'll put my arm around you. and we'll get back to the bounce house! (thrilling music playing). - And we're back. I'm going to say "And we're back" after Time Rangerers. - I thought you meant the Time Rangerers are back. - Nope, they're over. And we at this desk are back. - Like news anchors. - Yeah, sure. - Hey, as you spin that wheel, let me put this thought in your head. Time Rangerers... Emmy.

- You mean like my ex half sister, Emmy? - "A wild monkey is loose in the studio.". - Uh-oh. Quiet. (monkey screeching). Look what just came over there. - A freaking wild monkey! Is it over here? - Its over there. - Oh, he's jumping all over the place! He's over here, he's over here. He's over here, he's over here! He's down here.

He's coming at us. Nope he's not. - Can we CGI a monkey? - No. - Okay. He's over there. He's staying over there.