Bacon Bandages
- Hey, Rhett. - Yeah. - Pull my finger. (music note plays). - I'm Chris from Cincinnati, Ohio. Good Mythical Morning. (bouncy music). - Good Mythical Morning. ♪ [Both] You know what day it is? ♪. ♪ It's Thursday ♪.
♪ And Thursday ♪. ♪ means mail ♪. ♪ Mail (laughs) ♪. - Okay (claps) here we go, it's another day of fun. You did a good thing by being here. Why? Because this episode is brought to you. by the Rhett & Link store. where you can get rub some bacon on it T-shirt. That's the reason why, what, what? - Okay--. - Savoring--. - I didn't know you were doing that. - Just savoring the moment, Link.
- And you did a good thing by being here. because I'm looking down upon mail. that you people have sent us to the PO box--. - Let's get it to it, brother. - It's a mythical PO box, but it's also real. - Link, an amazing thing happened in the mail this week. And that is that two people, independently, and I don't believe this was coordinated, and that's what I mean by independently--. - Okay. - sent bacon strip Band-Aids. Well actually, to be technical, it's adhesive bandages. because Band-Aids is a brand. - That's right. - The first one is--. - And it looks like raw bacon.
That's what's funny is they didn't make the Band-Aid look. like cooked bacon, it looks like raw bacon. - And it's edible. - Oh, for real? - You should eat them. - Yeah, let's get into it. - "I hope you receive these bacon bandages or--. - Bacon, bacon. - "bac-andages in good health. "But if you don't, that might actually be good timing. "on my part. "Notice that they are die-cut, which I can only assume. "is the war cry you will shout when affixing one of these. "to your separated flesh.". - I get it. - Thank you, Brandon Dixon. - Die, cut! (blows raspberry).
- And this is an interesting one. This is from Nina. She says, "I got you this bacon air freshener. "for the Ford Bronco, "along with some funny bacon Band-Aids for the kids--". - So the Ford Bronco--. - Oh, they're for the kids? They're for the kids, Link. - Oops. - You ruined it! She says, "I've been trying to get my roommates to watch, "but we're all Russian, and some of us. "understand English less than others.". So that's why we are making an official announcement today. that I will be speaking in English. and Link will be translating me in Russian. for the rest of this season two, of Good Mythical Morning.
- (imitates Russian language). - And that's not offensive to the Russian fans at all. - Okay. So I'll drop that, but while you were talking, I got an injury on my chin. - Oh, there's some bacon on your chin. - Thank goodness I was able. to rub some bacon adhesive on it. (indistinct) from New York writes, "Dear Rhett and Link, I have sent to you. "a limited edition comic book featuring. "previews of some blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. "I received this from a particular snow angel.
"I met in Siberia--. - Whoa, a little snow--. - "for no cost at all.". - Snow angel, I don't know what that means. Sounds interesting, though. - Intriguing. - Maybe it was the girl that sent me some bacon strips. - Send us footage of that. "I hope you can put this in the Mythical Time Capsule. "so in the future, when all comic books are eaten. "by vicious hawks, people can remember the glorious pastime. "that was reading comics.". This will go in the Mythical Time Capsule. And you know what? Right here in the middle, there is an ad for the new X-Men comic, which features. Iceman, the guy who didn't exist until...
- Well, I think he's a new character. I don't think he existed until this new issue. - Continue to correct us in the comments. - Okay. This is from Josh Cook. He says, "Dear Rhett and Link, "My name is Josh and I'm from Redmond, Oregon. "I decided to send this Star Wars treasure. "for the Mythical Time Capsule. "It is a piece of film from The Phantom Menace. "And don't worry, this film strip. "does not have Jar Jar in it.". So this is an actual piece of film from the original, the original film strip of Star Wars.
- So when they go back and play the film, it's like. this piece is gonna be missing? It's gonna be in our Mythical Time Capsule. - We have it. We can only, the film can only be watched, all the film, if they contact us. This has five frames of Anakin as a child, which means it's approximately one-fifth of a second. of the movie, Link. - What did you do, some math? - I did some math. - Okay. "Dear Rhett and Link, "My brother and I are devoted Mythical Beasts. "Even though we are young, twelve and thirteen, "we can have an impact on the future by sending something.
"to the mythical time capsule.". Exactly right! - I like the way he thinks. - You can have an impact on the future, people, by not only watching, but contributing to this show. "We have enclosed a possum skull, "in case possums go extinct in the future. "The aliens can then study this skull. "and potentially make clones. "to reconstruct the possum society.". - Well, let me tell you one thing real quick. Possums are much more vicious than you would think. Once you see their bare skull, I mean, look at that thing. Looks like a little saber-toothed tiger.
- Well, when you put flesh and skin. and eyeballs that look in different directions on 'em, they look pretty stupid and unvicious. - And I will say--. - But the aliens can reconstruct them, evidently. - Well, he sent this to us. It had a lot of like, - Flesh? - There's like stuff up in the brain cavity. I had to throw it in some bleach and put it in the sun, and now it's touchable. - "With love from Hammond, Indiana, this has been sent. - "Mythical handshake, mythical (indistinct).". Thank you. - It would be a little, like a pendant, like women wear. Yeah, just have it right there--. - Or witch doctors--.
- What's that? It's my possum skull. Okay. "To Rhett and Link, I was shopping yesterday, "and this candy bar literally yelled at me, "buy this for Rhett and Link.". - No it didn't. - I doubt that. "It's beef jerky coated in chocolate. "I'd be afraid to try it, but I'm not afraid. "to send it to you. Enjoy!". That's from Phil. You see how I did that? - That was good. Beef jerky covered in chocolate. - I am made to do this kinda thing. - As you eat that, I'm gonna read this one. "Dear Rhett and Link, "My name is Drew. I live in Lattimore, North Carolina, "and I'm 15. Your show is a part of my (chews) regime.
"I love to hunt, kill things, and play with fire.". - Whoa. - "I have a lot of squirrel tails, so I thought. "I would send you all one for the Mythical Time Capsule.". - I just touched a possum skull and then ate chocolate. - And I'm touching a squirrel tail. and reading the rest of his letter. "About the latchkey kids, I am one. "Usually, I just shoot bird or squirrels with my 22.". - Don't be shooting a bird, man.
- "We did have a skunk problem, but I took care of them. "You guys are the best, so don't stop.". Thank you, Andrew. I think we're gonna keep this, and I'm gonna attach a pen to it. I'm actually gonna put it in my hat, when I start wearing hats. - You attach a pen to it. Okay, no, you wear that around, and I wear the possum pendant. - I could probably--. - We're here! How can we help? You know, it wouldn't be an episode, thanks for all the mail you send us. Send it to our PO box. We'll continue to talk about things. that strike a fancy with us. If you're gonna send something for us to eat, may it be sealed, please.
- And tasty. - And it wouldn't be an episode of mail Thursday. without a completely unrelated episode of. - [Both] The Time Rangerers. (jazzy music). [Announcer] Time Rangerers. - Hey, man. - Hey. - Hey. Is it just me, or are you wearing a helmet? - Yep, this is a helmet. - That's what I thought. - You know, I've been thinking. We're like official time travelers now,
and sometimes we get hurt. So I thought maybe we should have some kind of protection. - As a matter of fact--. - That's not a bad point. - I got you a helmet. - Really? - Yeah. It's right here. Let me put it on your head. - Let me help you with that with my hand here. - There you go. Wow. That looks good on you. - Really? - Yeah. I love it. You look great! - I don't know, man. I don't think helmet goes with my persona, you know? Trying to maintain an image here. - No, you look good. You look very intimidating.
- I don't know, I feel kind of self-conscious. Maybe I just won't wear a helmet. - No, you need to wear it. Trust me. You never know what could happen. Hey, just forget about it. Let's go time traveling. - All right. - You know that bounce house. that we sometimes time travel in? - Over there? - Over there, yeah. - Yep. Right there. - Let's go to it. (shuffling feet). - Okay. Now listen, before you start bouncing--. - I'm already bouncing. - I got a question for you. because you know so much about time travel. - Yeah, shoot. - You know we said that this bounce house. is an unreliable time machine, meaning that we can't go to exactly where we want to go.
But yet, we were able to get back to modern day. after our last escapade. - Right. - How did that work? - You're breaking the cardinal rule of time travel. - Huh? - Never ask questions about time travel. Let's bounce. - Okay? - Like literally, let's bounce. - Okay. Let's bounce. I get it. (electronic whirring). - And here we are in time. - Oh yes. I know what this is. This is the year 7549. in the future. It's a post-apocalyptic landscape.
- Post-apocalyptic, right? - Yep. - Like we're talking like left behind scenario, like those people over there? - Those people are left behind over there, yes. - They were left behind. Let's go check out those people. - Okay. (feet shuffling). - Looks like there's a very important man. that's about to speak to them. - Oh, that's why the people have gathered. - (shushing). - Let's listen to what he has to say. - [Man] I, Goba, ruler of this decimated earth, declare that bicycles are now illegal. and all bicyclists shall now be immediately executed,
starting with these two. Seize them! - Seize them? Who's he talking about? Is there somebody behind us here? - I think he's talking about you and me. because we've got bicycle helmets on. - Oh, that's a good point. That explains why there's more of a crowd coming towards us! (crowd yells). - An angry mob! Oh my goodness! - Listen: we're not bicyclists, we're just time travelers! We wear these helmets for protection. - We hate bicycles and, oh, my helmet just fell! - Are you okay down there? Here, you need it. You need this.
- Put it back on my head, it can protect from the mobs! - Let's get back to the gazebo! - Hold on. - [Both] It's a bounce house! (dramatic music). - And there you have it. Let's (gibberish). spinning the wheel, how does that sound, huh? Whee! Here it goes. - That pendant, you need to--. - Oh yeah. Use the teeth. - Strap it on something. - No, I can use the teeth right there on the v-neck.
- Yeah. - There we go. That works. - Lamest. Ending. Ever. - What do you think we should do to end this episode? - I don't know, I think I'm just gonna... I don't know, use this Band-Aid to end it? Like, let's lick the Band-Aid. That wouldn't be lame at all. - Well, you do that, I'm just gonna... gonna make this motion with my hand. - Bacon Band-Aid. - Look over there. - Lame. (jazzy music).
