Sarah Jessica Parker: How Carrie Bradshaw Changed Me (Full Episode)

[Music]. What is up, daddy gang? It is your. founding father, Alex Cooper with Call. Her Daddy. Sarah Jessica Parker, welcome to Call. Her Daddy. Thank you, Alex. Thank you. for having me. No, thank you for being. here. You don't even know. I When I. started Caller Daddy, you were beyond beyond beyond obviously. the inspiration. And then when I started. interviewing people, you have been at. the top top top of the list to sit down.

with. So, thank you for being here. Oh. my gosh. Thank you. Thank you for having. me. And um especially in New York City. cuz I know it's not your home home, but. it was at one point. And you're Is it. true that you're maybe coming back or is. that just some wishful hopeful rumor? It's a rumor. No. You know what? I Every. time I get here, I feel like I'm alive. again. Not that I'm like dead in LA, but. No, but it has a certain kind of uh it's. a very dynamic city and it sort of it.

does that to people when they step off. the plane, which is really curious. because I think Los Angeles actually. actively. does the opposite. It sort of. it's just a quieter, less intrusive city. on a person completely. I feel like I'm. like entering my spa era when I go to LA. and then I come here and I'm like, "Where are we going to dinner? What's. going on? The night starts at midnight.". That's why you earlier were like, "Oh, did you have a late night?" Well, didn't. your did your So, how did it go? And.

what was the experience? And how was it. to I'm sure you've seen it already, but. Yes. It was so nerve-wracking. Was it. really? I'm sure you know, like even as. you've been in media for so long, when. you put out a piece of work that's just. a little bit different than you're used. to or even coming back, right? people, but I'm going to be honest. I was like, "Okay, now I'm going to interview Sarah.

Jessica Parker." So, everybody, I'm. going to bed. I'm putting my face mask. on. Don't talk to me. So, I'm happy to. be here with you. Well, you're no words. for wear. You look great. I'm glad the. night was felt good and felt the way you. hoped it would feel. Yeah, it's a big. deal. Us talking about LA verse New. York. You obviously live here. You're a. tried and trueue New Yorker. What is. your favorite part of living here? I. really feel like when I walk out the. door, anything can happen. And and there.

are degrees of that being good and. potentially. awful. um you're bumping into neighbors. and you're bumping into the familiar, but every single day. I'm having exchange with or physically. touching somebody who might never be on. that street again, you know, and I I. really really love that and I always. have. There were these two young uh. fellas. I I came out of our house.

yesterday and um stoops are a thing in. New York and just because you own one. doesn't mean it's yours. It's. everybody's stoop. And I said I spent. decades sitting on other people's. stoops. And in my head I dreamed one day. I hope I can have a stoop. And so every. time we come home and there's people on. our stoop, people always move their. stuff really quickly cuz they realize. they're they're in the path or and I'm. always like, "No, no, no. Stay, stay, stay." But um yesterday I came out and. there were two boys standing at the at.

the foot of the stoop and there was a. penny heads up on the last step of the. stoop. and I said, "Fellas, there's a penny heads up. Why are you. not taking grabbing this penny?" I guess. my point of the story is I would have. had no other reason to talk to these. guys on the street smoking pot, you know. what I mean? Like they were just there. and having a m like they were in between. something and chatting and um you know I.

like imposed myself on them but it was. definitely um a friendly exchange and. they were sort of like I think they felt. like a friendly reprimand or something. but that would never happen if I had. gotten out of if I got out of my house. I walked out of my house and I walked. into a garage and I got into a car and I. drove down the street. I just wouldn't. have I don't know if that's something. that other people might like, but I do. Julie, I love people just like loitering. in front of my house. It's fabulous.

Hold on. Did they know who you are? Yes, they they did. They um it was like a. slow burn. But um our initial our. initial exchange was just three three. people two of whom were not strangers. What I was the stranger to them and I. said to them, "Fellas, look down." Like. don't walk around just here or here. Um. look down for your penny. They're like, "Sarah, Jessica, we're high. Like babe,

I'm too high. I'm not even looking at. the goddamn penny." So did you pick it. up? You're probably right. I I picked it. up and I I felt like maybe if they saw. my enthusiasm for it, they would they. would pick up and next time they'd be. all the wiser for it. I don't know. I. think they will. I think they will. I. don't know. Call Her Daddy is brought to. you by T-Mobile. Daddy gang. It is time. to start getting treated like the main. character that you are with T-Mobile.

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be. Be the main character at. t-mobile.com/benefits. You and public transportation. Let's. pause for a few seconds because. you have quite literally been seen on. subways walking around the city. You're. one with the people in New York City. Like everyone knows that. How like how. are you just like walking to your local. Delhi and not getting attacked? I mean. people always say hello and they talk or.

they nod. Um I have headphones. I'm not. convinced that really does anything. I. have sunglasses but I always have worn. sunglasses. It it does it doesn't really. there's still. um activity on the subway. people chat. and talk, but I will say people are so. much more on their phones now that. you're not quite as um on the subway if. I talk people hear my voice. That's. similar to me where my voice is more.

recognizable that I am always like I'll. be in an elevator with my husband and. he'll be like, "What do you want to do?". And I'm like, "Matt, later later, honey. Later." Wait, when you have your. headphones on, are you actually. listening to something? always. What are. you listening to? Oh my gosh. Putting. you on the spot. Everything. Um. podcasts. Um lots of music. Um um mostly. podcast. I don't listen to books on um. audio. Um it'd be podcasts or music.

Yeah. And are you faking phone calls? Um. I've almost never done that. Um, I think I've done it more with my. children when I was outside recently and. I knew that they wanted to talk to me. and I needed to do something and I but. then I thought, oh, you know, there's a. right and wrong way to do this because. the phone if you're actually on a call, the phone looks one way, the screen. looks one way. And if you're not, I.

think it's all just visible. Yes, I do. have a privacy screen on my phone. Okay, that helps. And pro tip, you need to put. it on do not disturb and you need to. angle it towards your chin. I fake phone. calls all the time all the time. You. just tilt it so no one can see that. you're like fully on your photo album. and there's no phone call. Okay, great. I got you. So, it's always on do not. disturb and do not disturb just doesn't. allow for like a a lighting situation. Got it. Okay. Can we talk about fashion?

Sure. Because. talk about your shoes. I was about to. say we need to talk about my shoes. I. have I don't usually dress up for. interviews. You look so beautiful. Thank. you. Really? I And your hair is down and. your hair is not in a pony or a clip or. I know. I'm so um touched. I love that. you walked in and you're like, "Wait, I'm dressed down and you're dressed up.". I know. I felt like I went through three. outfits before I came here trying to um. telepathically. guess.

what would be appropriate. And then. ultimately I realized, oh, the more I'm. trying to be something else, I'm I I. look like an idiot. You dress down as me. dressed up. Like if unless you showed up. in sweats, I'd be like, "Okay, you got. it." So these shoes I have never worn. open to heels on Call Her Daddy ever. Ever in the history of ever. And I. probably never will. Lovely on you. Well, thank you. But it's just an ode to. Miss Carrie Bradshaw. They are the shoes. that you wore in the show Running to the.

Ferry. Yes. This outfit was also loosely. inspired by the green jersey. I remember. it with the cargo. I was like, I have to. recreate it. I I I knew the minute I saw. it. And I don't actually remember a lot, but I remember outfits and cross. streets. Outfits and cross streets. Yeah. I didn't know if you would know. the Jimmy shoes. And the minute for. everyone that didn't see this moment, she literally walks in the door. She. goes, "Hi, I'm Sarah Jessica. Oh my. gosh, I love the shoes. I can't believe.

you're wearing those shoes. Like, thank. God she noticed. And it was such a. clever thing that Jimmy Chu just. reissued. Was it 2007, 2008? I can't remember the year of that. line of Yeah, I got you, girl. Those are. really pretty shoes. And um my original. pair, we had two pairs for that episode. because I lost one. Um and I was running. so much in them that they were getting. trashed. So they had a backup pair. The.

pair that I wore. has the the glue under the feather has. yellowed. We we pull them out all the. time to have them on the show now. because they're always like in the. closet moving around. Um and we have a. new pair, but the new pair is of like we. have the unused pair, but it's of little. interest to me cuz it has like no. sentimental value. Um so, but when I saw. fresh pairs, I was like, "Wow, they do. look good." That's what it's like with a.

fresh pair. But I bet the yellow glue is. even sexier. It's pretty touching. Yeah, I think so, too. I'm going to add that. to mine later. Pretend I was there. Feel. something. um the iconic looks that. you've had, how involved were you in. Car's style? I think Pat and Molly would. probably characterize this the same way. It was It was always a real. conversation. And I I'll try to paint a. picture. I'd come to a fitting, it would. be 11:00 at night at RAP or it could be.

two in the afternoon and the the. fittings could be anywhere from two to. five hours and that wouldn't always. cover an episode. Um, so. I would walk in, there were racks of. clothes and that those the the quantity. of racks grew and grew over the years. Initially, nobody loaned us anything. We. couldn't get our hands on anything. We. had, I think, $10,000 originally per. episode as a budget. Um, so I'd walk in and there would be racks.

of clothing and there would be ideas set. per scene, per episode, and we would. talk about it. They'd show it to me and. I always tried everything on. I don't I. didn't care how ridiculous or whimsical. or even hideous it was that the joy it. would bring the costume department to. just see something on as you know it. could be some crazy jumpsuit that they. pulled out of someone's bin or a. basement from 1971 and it was like. illshaped and sort of unattractive but.

there was something great about it. Lot. of Polaroids. So we work. So but then. once we kind of figured out what we. liked per scene and we knew that it fit. with perhaps other people's fittings of. someone else had fit before me, we knew. their colors. We would talk about it and. then we would show the pictures to. Michael or Darren the showrunner. Initially it was Darren. And then they'd. have feelings. they'd come back and we'd. talk about it and we'd plead our case in. some instances where they didn't want us. to wear something and we had to sort of,

you know, our case before the court. Um, but more and more so was is the case. that it's just big conversations and it. usually starts about 3 months before. we're shooting, even two months prior to. prep. Molly and I um are already. figuring out. So, I started my fittings. in February for this season and we. started shooting in April. And your. whole life, were you a big fashion girl. or did this happen because of the show?

I I wasn't somebody that. my mother really loved beautiful. clothing and we didn't have money to. have beautiful clothing, but she was. very industrious and we lived in a. wealthy neighborhood. We were like the. least wealthy people. um the affordable. house and you know in those days church. tag sales and she was really smart about. getting her hands on beautiful things. for little or no money. So in our home.

she liked beauty and she made some of. her clothes she could sew. So I grew up. understanding that. things were. worthy, things were beautiful, things. were wellmade, things were good quality. fabric, things were um hard to find. that, you know, that taffida or that. file would be very expensive by the. yard. And so I understood it, but I.

didn't have my hands on a lot of it. And. then when I started living on my own, I. would still see things in New York City. that I understood to be good, but I. didn't or even important, but I didn't necessarily have the. financial opportunity to get my hands on. them. And I was pretty strict about. sort of what I thought would have a. life. I was thinking about it because I. saw recently online, it was a part of an.

interview you did and you talked about. how you negotiated in your contract that. you got to keep every single one of. Car's outfits and you have it archived. I'm like, Sarah Jessica, how the hell. did you pull that off? And it's from. episode one. It's from episode one. Yeah, it's um you know, I will none of. the credit is mine because previous to. Sex in the City, I started working with. a new attorney before I even met my. husband. So about 35 years ago and. one of the most important things he said.

to me outside of the fact that I think. he's a terrific businessman and a great. and fair attorney is that from the. beginning of our relationship he said. you should always keep your clothing no. matter what it is. And he said some. studios are going to be harder to. negotiate with about that because they. like to have their own archive and that. makes sense. And he was totally right. There are studios that really want to. hang on to stuff. So, it's a a very. complicated dance to get your pieces, but so by the time I was doing Sex in.

the City, it was just in my contract. that I have everything. I mean, with the. exception of something that a designer. loaned us that needed to go back or a. consignment piece from a vintage shop, but often those same designers would end. up saying, "Just keep it. Have it be. part of that archive." So, yeah, it's a. huge amount. How often do your daughters. ask to borrow clothes? You know what? So. many people rightfully ask that. They. just don't. They don't. No, they they're. not. Girls, they like clothing and I'll.

get a text. couple times a month asking can they. purchase something there. Um, but they. mostly they mostly buy their clothes. used. Okay. Almost entirely, which I. think is pretty common now with girls, young women their age. I'll be 16 later. this month. Um, so they're pretty. steady. They don't tend to be trend. They don't move toward that. They know.

they don't have a budget. They don't. have money with with the exception of. what they've earned. Um, and one of them. is a little bit better at earning than. another who's pretty she saves pretty. well. They'll they both had jobs last. summer. Um, do they ask for fashion. advice? They'll ask me. ask me, you know, what do you think of. that? Or what about this dress for this. occasion? Um, maybe they'll ask about. shoes. My shoes don't fit them. It's. really a tragedy. I'm actually not.

kidding. I find it really tragic that we. That's actually the worst. They can't. One of them can. sort of squeeze. Um, but their taste is. different than mine right now, too. Like. what I have is not necessarily of. interest. They've never seen the show. So they haven't an idea about what is. available to them yet. But I do give I. give them stuff of mine all the time. All the time. I think that makes sense.

though cuz I think back to my own mother. and well also my mom is not you. So love. you Lori if you're watching this. But my. mom is like way more like polo and. Bermuda shorts. I'm like that's not. going to cut it for me. I want something. glamorous. But as I got a little older, I started to really appreciate like her. vintage Levis. So maybe eventually, who. knows, they will eventually like tap. into the Carrie Bradshaw archive and be. like, I need a not maybe a dress for. prom, still not that age, but maybe in.

their 20s they're going to hit. I would. Yeah. And I would loan I I think I would. be happy to loan them anything out of my. closet right now. I don't really have as. many clothes as people think. What is a. piece from Car's closet that you still. wear today? nothing. I keep I keep in my personal closet, which everything else is an archive. I. keep this belt um that I named Roger and. I don't know why. It's a belt from. later.

years. It's a studded leather belt that. Carrie wore a lot a lot a lot and it was. I think. in the movie and it's reappeared. Carrie, you know what? I think Carrie. first first wore it when she was. shopping in um DVF store in the meat. packing and she had on a pink linen. shift and around her waist was a hard. leather belt, a vintage belt that's, you. know, about this wide and it's studded.

and it's really old and hardy. It's like. a muscle and for some reason I have. that. I never. I never sent that to archive. Yeah. What? You don't know why you called it. Roger? I think we were reaching for it. so much, which happens in fittings, where something becomes like a favorite, and it just kept being right for. everything. And so, I don't know why I named it Roger. I. just it just seemed easier and more. efficient to everyone know instead of. saying the black leather with the studs. and just Roger. Roger. Yeah, grab Roger.

How is your personal style different. from Carrie's? Very not nearly as brave. um. not as. um. kind of not as uh. conscious about body and. what clo how clothes. lay on a body. Um which I guess has to. do more with like I said being brave and. just access to way more like a much more.

I always say it's like she has a much. more fevered relationship to fashion. than I have. So, she just has so much. more. It's so decadent. the amount of things, you know, pieces. and layers and hats and. belts, shoes, obviously, um, coats, gloves, and I I just don't have that. You know,

when you were referencing earlier that. your kids don't really lean into trends. This is a very pressing question. Okay. Oh my god. I hope I'm capable of. answering. You've got this. You've got. this. There is no right or wrong answer. Okay. Sarah Jessica Parker. Would you. put a Leubu on your designer bag? What. is that? Oh my god, you guys are laughing at me. No. Wait, hold on a second. What is. Wait, I just want you to know I don't. own one of these, so don't judge me. Someone put this on my bag earlier. Oh,

so this is Are these like dolls? They. look like um Cupid dolls. So people are. buying these things. Again, clarifying. I've never bought one. Okay. Did someone. send them to you? Someone in this room. owns them. We're not going to judge. No, no, no. I'm not judging at all. It's a. curiosity. It's like a It's like an. archae like a dig. So people are buying these for extremely. high price. People are waiting in line. for hours to get these things. Do you. think Do you feel comfortable telling me. what you think one of them costs? Like.

is that a Prada for now? It's going. higher because there's so few that. people are trying to get these. Would. you ever put this on your bag? You can. be honest cuz I wouldn't. I think I. wouldn't, but not because I'm better. than that and not because I'm above it. I just It's not your style. I don't. think I ever hung a lot from a bag. Even. when scarves started being tied around. bags. Yes. Um, people are adding things. to bags and chains a lot, but you've. never been a chain adding bag girl. No. Okay. So, SJP's not putting a laboo on.

her purse. But once again, not because I. don't Yes. care for it or think it's. silly. Everybody do what you want. Yes. 100%. clarification. Do what you want. Yes. And now, how long has this been. happening? This Leoo Boooo thing. It's a. new trend for sure. I would say this. past month it's really popped off but. people have had it for a little bit but. it's really you just said something. Did. you say popped off? Popped off. Yes. So. that means um like really became big.

like a thing. Yeah. Okay. Viral. did it go did your daughter like yes mom. pop off queen. Oh god. Oh my god. Sad. Um let's go back for a second. You. mentioned obviously your mom and where. you guys lived. Everyone obviously knows. you as a New York girl, but you're from. Ohio. Yes. I moved to New York when um. on January 1st of 1977. So I was 11 or. 12. Yes. What was your hometown like? Cincinnati. Wonderful. We go back to. Cincinnati all the time. It is a very.

impressive, exciting city. Okay. I'm. going to take your word for it. Beautiful. It's beautiful. Done. Yeah. Seven siblings. Yes. I'm one of eight. What was the dynamic like in your house? Like was it chaotic ever? Yeah, it was. chaos all the time. It was my mother. amazingly survi. My mother just it was a. military operation without any of the um. infrastructure. So, she was really um.

strict and scary and had very high. standards. And. I'm going to I'm going to use the phrase. that she yelled, but as a parent, I can. now recognize that it wasn't yelling. It's the It's the level you need to. speak at when you're trying to organize. packs of people and get people um. wrangled. Um but it was, you know, a. messy house, a loud house. Um it was.

really funny and there was always a. record on or music or the news and Yeah. Like always something. Yeah. Always. noise. Always. Can you describe yourself. as a kid? Very curious. I would probably. say that I was nosy as well. Like I. wanted to. I wanted to hear and know everything. I.

stared a lot at people. Like I was. always. looking at everybody. Um, I I liked any new thing. I liked any. chance to get out of the house. I loved. going to the theater. Cincinnati has a. really incredible theater called the. Playhouse in the Park and my father was. a stage manager there. So, we went to a. lot of theater and University of. Cincinnati, um, their conservatory has.

an incredible theater department. We. went to the ballet all the time. like. there was a lot of opportunities to be. outside like literally and psychically. Eventually you get to New York City. Can. you tell me though like once you really. start working and acting in your early. days? What was the hardest lesson you. had to learn in those like kind of. beginning big days of acting? You just. don't get the job. You don't get the. job. You just audition and audition and.

audition and audition and you don't get. the job. And it's. there's something about it that's very. bleak sincerely. um. but it's the very best thing that can. happen to you. And I know people kind of. frame all conversations about building a. career that way and it's probably true. across industries. Um there's a lot of. virtue that we put on failure and I'm. not quite talking about failure. I'm. talking about.

um. getting better at trying, getting better. at auditioning, plain and simple, in my. case, just being better at it, maybe. being more prepared, maybe being more. comfortable, better certainly at not getting the job. and having it not um like crater you. Um. so the biggest lesson I got from those. early days is yeah you pick yourself up.

and you move on. And in my case you know. I didn't have like I needed to support. myself. Um by the time I was really on. my own which I I moved out when I turned. 18 um I had a little money in the bank. from Square Pegs but not a big amount. I. knew exactly how much money I had in the. bank and I took it out like very. judiciously. I I tried to get by on $40. like for 3 days. Um because I just. didn't know for sure. I knew I would.

work, but the investment, the 10. auditions for the one job or the 20, but. I just simply think it's really good for. us. And I feel like you're so much more. equipped even to have this conversation. because you're constantly talking to. people your age and younger about. how to pursue something and have it be. meaningful and the difference between. that. and pursuing success. And there's this.

big chasm that exists between creating a. career and having that be your. destination. and having your destination being. success or fame or wealth. And I think. they're at odds. Yes, I agree. There's a. lot of times where when you're talking. about getting rejected essentially in. these moments, which is so hard. When. you love something and something is your. true passion, yes, of course, everyone. has an ego and it's going to sting, but. a lot of times you can turn it around.

and selfm motivate again to be like, I'm. going to just keep going because this is. the thing I want so badly, which I know. in your case, like with Broadway and all. of it, like this is who you are to the. core. You've wanted this. You want to be. performing, right, in some capacity. Performing but not famous, performing. but not rich, performing but not. wealthy, performing but not powerful. like none of that used to exist as um. as something you work toward. Now. I I'm not speaking for everybody, but I.

don't recall any conversation. ever for the majority of my youthful. career when I was building one that I. heard anybody talk about. fame or any of the collateral stuff that. accompanies that. And um I just feel. like it was healthier for all of us, you. know, and and I don't not I'm not. entirely sure I understand. what all the other stuff really.

adds. I mean, there's security and. financial gain. There is so much and. it's such a relief to be able to pay. your bills, but I don't know. No, I will. add to that. I think a lot of people one. it is way. there is more ability to get fame. nowadays it's it's almost like it's. quite accessible especially with the. internet. and I think yes it's almost like take. finances out of it of course money can.

help in so many ways like that isn't. obvious but fame as a concept I actually. think it's the rise and people getting. to it that they think it's going to. solve something within themselves. And. if you probably ask anyone with fame, how do you feel about the fame? Everyone's going to be like, well, I. actually love my job, but I hate that. part of it. So, it's almost like once. you get to that top, don't if you're. going for the fame, you're not going to. actually feel fulfilled because there's. actually nothing within fame. Yeah. And. it's too elusive. You can't It's.

unreliable. It's fickle. Um, but I feel. like we both have to be so careful. Like, there's nothing wrong with wanting. to have people know who you are. And I I. and I think it all the water all the. water is like very muddied. Yes. You. then eventually got fame. Let's talk. about Sex in the City. Call Her Daddy is. brought to you by Whiteclaw. I don't. know who needs to hear this, but you're. way too hot to be spending the summer. sitting inside scrolling on your phone. What are you doing? What are you doing?

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I just found it very compelling. All I. had was the pilot script. I did know who. Candace was because I was a New Yorker. and I knew about her column in the. Observer. Um, we all knew that paper. because it was pink which was unusual. for um that's a broad sheet I think but. and somebody had sent me the book and I. don't know why. So I was familiar with. her work. Um, the script was pretty. slight, like it wasn't a long pilot,

but first of all, the way she was. speaking, like her choice of language, I'd never. seen or heard a woman talk like that. And there was a kind of darkness to the. pilot script that I thought was um. very exciting to imagine. And there is. the last. moment as described almost entirely in. stage direction is she meets this fellow.

big. He gives her a ride. He says, "Hey, can I give you a ride?" They they have a. sort of. flirty. slightly withholding conversation in the. back of a town car. That's a town car. And do you know what a town car is? I. do. I do. Um you guys don't know what a. town car is, do you? If you saw it, you. two would be a town car. Um and he he he. asks Carrie, you know, have you ever. been in love? And she says something.

flippant to him about I don't remember. what she says. and he drops her off at. her apartment and she gets out and the. cameras as described, I think in the. pilot script, the camera stays on Carrie. and she walks toward her apartment door. and she quickly turns around and she. goes up to the window and she knocks on. the window like with her knuckles and he. he rolls it down and she says, "Have you. ever been in love?" And he says, "Can I. curse?" Okay. He says, "Abso.

fuckingutely." But he doesn't say it. like that. He says it beautifully. He. says abs fuckingutely. And she turns. around and walks back to her door, her. door, and his car, I think, pulls away. in the background. And the the camera. just freezes on her. And I was like, well, now we got a story. And I just was. like, well, where could this where could. it possibly end? could just whether.

these two together or separately there's. so much. It felt to me that there was a. huge amount there. I have chills. You. just describing that I'm like okay like. it was perfect. Um what did you admire. the most about her? Her kind of cander, her curiosity about sex and sexual. politics, which is not like me. I don't. talk about that at all even with. friends. I I'll talk about it globally. but not I don't sit and share intimate.

details of my life that way. Um I liked. that she was sort of circumspect about. when she wrote that she had a kind of. thing about. this was what happened and how well how. does it relate to the world? How does it. relate to other women? And I I admired. that she was scrappy you know she was. sur like a little survivor. She had like. instincts to like. keep her head not always making smart.

choices and falling short of being. the best friend or the best girlfriend. or her best self. But I also was very. happy that they were writing her that. way. Was there anything that frustrated. you about Carrie? So, no. And yeah, and I say that. like slightly sheag grinned because.

I know. as much as I don't read anything, I you. can glean that people um there's a. sentiment sometimes that she's. frustrating or she's selfish or she. makes poor decisions or she doesn't. manage her money well. Yeah, all of that has been true over the. course of the last 25 years. Um but. she's also been like hugely loyal, decent, reliable, a really good friend, um generous, available, present,

comforting, um given of herself in, you know, in big. in small ways that are private and. public to her and among her friends. Um, and she loves like. so. frustrated. If I were watching her and if I were her. friend and I would see a misstep or see.

her keep repeating something, you know, whatever, however she was choosing to. deal with big, um, I'm I'm sure I would. feel frustration or I would feel like, but as an actor playing it, mm- I want. all of it. I I want all of it. And also, I think we forgive our male characters, our our male leads. We have no problem. if they're, you know, murderers, you know, like we.

have honestly like So true. My favorite. show in that period is Sopranos. Like. it's my and I love Tony Soprano. Like I. don't know if you guys watch Sopranos, but it's one of the great television. shows in the history of American. television. But Tony Soprano was a. deeply flawed man. But we didn't talk as much about that as. we did Carrie having an affair with a. married man. You know, it was just very. curious to me. Or they'd say she's. selfish. And I was like, I can give you.

10 reasons and ways in which she wasn't. and you're like hyperfixated on this. So. frustrated, no. But I can I can. absolutely understand. if you're along for the ride. you can be. like lady girl. It's such a good point. I think it's so fair and I think that's. also a lot of even criticism also comes. from women and I think it's just because. we criticize ourselves so much. Yeah, we're very good at that beyond A+ in.

that category. But I think when people. are watching a lot of times I even felt. like you really become so obsessed with. these women that maybe a lot of the. critique is because these we actually as. viewers are like no you're my best. friend Carrie like I'm with you but like. we got to get it together. So that's. fair to hear you as an actress being. like oh I loved her and I but I so get. where you're coming from but like. doesn't bother me. And I I think that um. the way you characterize that that kind.

of voice frustration is so. wonderful even if they're mad even I. feel like gosh to be part of something. that is um that people have such strong. feelings for and against and those. feelings can change and they think. they're made they've made decisions. about people and then the people. surprise. Um, and Carrie matures, too. Um, but there wouldn't really be a show if.

she had been. a more stellar, consistently stellar. human being. There's no there's that's. that's it. The end. Done. Done at the. pilot. See you all. Bye. Yeah. Um, the. show really celebrated female confidence. behind the scenes at that time in your. life. How did you feel about yourself? Probably the same level of confidence. one feels on their best day and the lack. of it that one feels on a middling or.

your worst day. Um, and I do think that, um, being on. a television show in particular, um, that, um, grabs people's attention. um, was probably a real test of. coping, like my coping mechanisms, because I wasn't prepared, and this was. before social media, so I really wasn't.

prepared for public commentary and I. think that is that was um really. unpleasant at times where people would. have opinions not about the work. you everyone's allowed to everyone's a. critic but at the time there were fewer. of them and they had their feelings. about the show and sometimes I felt like. we all felt like well you're not really. you're misunderstanding but that's a. separate thing that's like an academic. conversation it was the personal stuff. that I was.

really not prepared for. So at that time. I thought I was a fairly confident. person. Not boastful, not it wouldn't be. a confidence you could detect. It was. just the way you get up every day and. try to get on with your life and take. care of yourself and the people you care. about and love. But I think it really comes into. question and is tested when um. when you're kind of filleted in a way. when you're opened up and I know you.

know this we're better for. those kinds of experiences but not all. of us are good at it right away and it. doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. Yes. And I. think that was the thing is that up to. that point. I would just I just never had. people have and there was no chatter. about me. There was no chatter about me. There was just my work. What were some.

of the comments that would be the. hardest that got you? I think just. discussions of my physical person like. stuff that I couldn't change and. wouldn't change and had never considered. changing or. even still after hearing something that. was like what somebody would say that. even still no interest in changing it. and also. and I think once again you can. appreciate this and you. I feel like you found a better way. I.

didn't feel like it was actually a. conversation. I didn't feel like I could. sit in a room and someone would say to. me, "You're really unattractive." And. then I could say, "Wow, um, well, first of all, that's like hard. to hear. But second of all, why are you. why are you why do you seem angry about. it or why do you feel it's necessary. to say it to comment?" And I think it. was really only only one time um and I.

don't really remember specifically the. occasion except it was brought to my. attention that a magazine said something. really um really mean about. you know who I am, how I look. And I was like. I was like someone it was like a kick in. the rubber parts. It was just like, why. why is this. a problem? Why is this.

deserving of your time? And why do you. seem to delight in saying it? And I. called my friends, two of my friends who. happen to be male, because I knew that. they might know about it. And I was just. like, I was sobbing because it felt so. purposeful. Um, and I think that's the only time I. really cried about it. And I think it. was just like an accumulation of like. maybe a season of that kind of.

commentary, which nobody was trying to. make me aware of it, but it get, you. know, it gets back to you. It gets in. It's interesting though because like you. said how maybe there it is a little. different now like in my position. Yes, I can like come on and speak like this, but like back then I the analogy you use. was so interesting where you're like I. feel like I'm like being put out. basically like a filt almost and it's. just like I'm getting seared and I and. then and you're an actress. So you're.

not you're playing this character. People are commenting on you. You're. going to the grocery store. You're. seeing your face on magazines. They're. giving commentary on your look. This is. in the day of magazines. Oh my god. And. then you just have to go back to work. Whereas now, yes, we can go online and I. can make an whole episode about it of. why do we feel so comfortable commenting. on women's bodies? Why do we feel like. women have to actually look like a. statue where we celebrate men and a beer. belly and it's like everyone's like he's. hot and it's like it's just the double.

standards are insane and talking more. about it. I appreciate you sharing that. because I think so many women watching. this would be like wait what? You're. literally one of the most beautiful. women in the world. Like what does that. and yet here we are. We can never be. good enough for the standards. So at. what point do we actually just be like. you have to just let it go. But it's so. [ __ ] hard. I think maybe you there's. like a. a threshold where. maybe you know crying about it because.

it just seemed so cruel um was like. done. I do wonder like and I'm sure. you've said this and many anyone who's. been criticized you can't help but. wonder. I couldn't help but wonder. Um. I'm sorry. Um would you say it to my. face? Would you? They will remember. I don't. know. Anyway, mic drop chop. Um you were. already married by the time you started. filming Sex in the City. I had just. gotten married the night. Like I we were.

married. We were I told Darren we were. supposed to start sooner and I said I I. I'm going to tell you a secret Darren. but I'm getting married on May 19th but. we don't really want to share that. publicly so can we start shooting and I. was doing a musical on Broadway at the. time also. So the show closed and the. next day I started shoot so the show. closed I think June 1st and the next. morning Monday morning I started. shooting the show. So I was 10 days. married before that period of your life.

How did your dating life compare to Miss. Carrie Bradshaw? It didn't compare. It. doesn't compare at all. It was much less. colorful, less busy. Um I dated but. um I would be I would meet someone and. date and then that would be a. relationship. You know, it lasted seven. years. You know, you were a relationship. girl. Yes. Did you have a type? No. No. You were just out there. I don't really.

think I have had a I don't think I have. a type. Do you think you and Carrie. would have ever dated the same man? Yes, I do. Big was always sending Carrie. mixed messages. Obviously, I roll. But I. feel I feel like we all have that one. guy that we gave too many chances to. What was a moment in your dating life. where you realized like, okay, I. actually like have to cut this off. Like, I've given this person too many. chances. the first person that I really.

I had a really lovely boyfriend at the. end of high school, like really. spectacular human being. And then um I. met somebody else who was also really. interesting and exciting and a dazzler. and had no interest in being in a. relationship. And I was really, really, really young. And so that like I I was. like, "What do you mean? What how.

I I was so. I just couldn't believe it." Um, so that. was an appropriate heartbreak. Like that. was a good old-fashioned sitting by the. phone. Um, today's going to be different. This. is today's the day. And um. but after that I met a fella and um. you know he was handsome but.

he he was not the best choice for me and. I think it was um too many conversations. that were not fruitful like they didn't. they were a waste of time and I. Actually, I appreciated that he was a beautiful, handsome man that people. Yes. said, "My god, he's handsome." But. I discovered I don't I didn't care.

I don't care if we cannot. speak. If we can't, right? You're like, "What are we doing? What are we doing?". You're now you're beautiful, but like at. what point am I now going to bed being. like, "I'm lonely. Yeah, we haven't. spoken when there was nothing. Yeah, there's just nothing there. Yeah, I. know. Ladies, like looks only go so far. You need the depth. You need the. connection. I think that's so relatable. Humor and intelligence and complexity.

and surprise, him being interested in. you and asking follow-up questions. Yes, a follow-up question. The simple things. was there were just anyway not a bad. person, just not right for you. Yeah. If. you needed relationship advice, who from. the core four would you want to call in. the show? I suppose if you just want. someone to comfort you, you reach you'd. call Charlotte. Yes. You know, because. she's so naturally. comfort. I'm going to say she's maternal.

in the because she is she is actually. maternal, the character is. And it's a. it's like a source of pride that she can. soothe. Mhm. Um I think if you want like. sound harsh, not sound not harsh, sound. firm, Miranda. Um and then if you want some nuance and. like you want to open it up to a larger. conversation, Carrie Caller Daddy is.

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swipe. Download Tinder today. Sex in the City was essentially, I feel. like, the first time on television that. women talked about sex and pleasure in a. really open way. How do you think the. conversations on the show actually. allowed women to have more sexual agency. in real life? I mean, I I guess what I. could tell you is that. probably about a year into the show. airing,

I could see evidence of its the way it. was impacting. New York City. Say, you'd see groups of. women all of a sudden in tables leaning. into each other. not leaning in, which I. I can't stand the phrase. Uh, but I mean physically like clustered. and and you'd see them in fours walking. down a sidewalk like lined up like. almost like a piece of equipment which I.

never really now maybe I was like hyper. vigilant because of what we were doing. all day long. So, and then just the anecdotal stuff of. all the women that just came up to me. and said all these years, you know, I. I was allowed to be me. I have different. relationships because what I saw I. wanted I wanted to talk or perhaps more. so importantly.

the multiples the thousands who have. said to me over the years that's me. That was me. I never heard somebody. saying on television or in cinema. talking with my friends like the way we. talk the way the truth of the way we we. conduct our relationships which is all. intimacy it's all sharing it's all. needing it's all helping it's all truth. it's all hurting each other um.

so I think like that combination I'm. aware of but I think the larger like. where does it sit? How has it? I think. I'm just like I'm not able to see it. And I think that's so fair. I also think. like. it's probably also easy to digest in. those moments when you meet a woman on. the street and she shares that with you. Like that's amazing. That's beautiful. I'm so happy a piece of work and art. that I've put together with a group of. people has impacted that way. Like I. think for me, I remember the way that.

comedy was used to lighten the. conversation for women around something. that historically has been. so taboo. It was It almost makes you. think when you're in your room at night. watching it, if you're alone or with. your friends, you're like, why do I feel. so awkward to talk about something that. should be liberating if I want it to be. right? Like if you want to engage in. that capacity. And I felt like for me. even at the genesis of starting Call Her. Daddy, like I remember that in the back.

of my head even of like feeling. empowered to just go for it because I. knew that had impacted the way that I. felt comfortable. So if I now do a new. iteration on my show, other women. hopefully will continue to feel more. liberated. And so I also think the lack. of shame I think the debriefs with women. was such a beautiful element of freedom. it gave to women to be like there why. can men just so casually talk about sex.

like for women if you want you can also. be celebrated and enjoy it. So there was. so many nuances to it which I completely. understand it's like where do we begin? You could do a million part series on it. but I just wanted to tell you like it. changed my life. So thank you. Well, it's good writing and it's great that. they. stuck, not stuck with it, but it's great. that they um the writers like felt. convinced of the idea and.

you know, then you. you do with it what you want. Yes. Obviously, the show is really based in. these beautiful friendships and I have. to bring up because I've obviously hung. out with him. He came on my tour. Mr. Andy Cohen. You guys are close friends. and I feel like people are obsessed with. your guys friendship. It's quite funny. What is his best quality as a friend? There's multiple. Um, and Andy has. talked about this both in his books and.

on the air. Andy has said yes to. everything. He has like gobbled up life. He's tireless. He wants to taste it, experience it, see it, hear it, know it, travel to it. Um, he has a a a. very attractive. and he um. is very.

proud of his friends. He's very. always. um. noting people's accomplishments. Always. We had a club years and years ago um of. everybody downtown. It sort of fell. apart cuz people moved and stuff, but it. was called the nitwits. And um we would. meet and there was the deputy, there was. the vice pres vice president, there was. a president, there was a secretary, there's a treasurer. And um then Andy.

would write the letter to the group like. once a month. It was the Nitwitz. newsletter. And the entire beginning or. the majority of the text of the body of. the work was everybody's accomplishment. over the last month. Everybody's success. story didn't have to be a big deal, you. know, to the wider world. So that's just. his nature. And I think that's why he. loves parenting so much and why it felt.

so necessary for him to be a parent was. to be involved in somebody else's life. cuz he, you know, as much as um his. reputation and his public profile is. wrapped around, you know, women that. sometimes, you know, fight or behave. poorly or whatever. And he's a good. shitster and he knows how to do it on. the show. his nature is to be, you know, up here and and uplifting.

Yeah. Um, okay. This is a little bit of. a pivot, but I do want to just quickly. ask you because I know a lot of women. are listening. Do you have any advice. for women who want kids, but are also. afraid that they may fall behind in. their career? Wow. What do you say to. them? I mean, I just recently talked. about this. I think it's like being. really in tune with yourself because I. think the reality is as a woman it is. going to be different but hopefully in a. beautiful way different right and I had.

spoken about with my husband that we. thought we wanted to try this past year. and now I realize I'm not ready and. that's okay and I felt shame and weird. about it and I was upset with myself. just because I was like how was I so. sure about something but really I want. to I have so much more I want to be. selfish with and I think as women it's. hard to be selfish and it goes against. our being. So, I want to be selfish a. little bit longer and I think that's. okay. So, my advice is take your time. I. don't think there's ever a perfect time,

but listen to yourself and don't allow. exterior factors to impact you just in. general. That's just Oh, that's outside. of fertility issues or thinking about. planning a family. That's really good. In my opinion, it's really advice. I I. couldn't agree more and I think the most. important thing that I think you said. well no it's equally important to other. things is um there's no right time. because um that's what makes it so. confusing for yourself and for so many.

women you think okay I'll just. accomplish this and then it'll be a. better time and then maybe you are you. do it you accomplish that and you think. but wait a second but because of those. accomplishments now this opportunity. exists and I'm not quite ready because I. know I won't be able to be the same. professional person. Um, so I would say. first of all there's there's not a right. time. So you have to kind of keep. looking at your life um.

with honesty and also it's really nice. to have somebody to talk about it to. with whom you can speak about it. doesn't have to be a partner because a. lot of people are choosing to have. families without um having somebody to. talk to. I think that because we I think. we spend a lot of time with fear and. anything that's complicated in our heads. and the minute we can talk about it, oh. my gosh, it feels so much better. Such a. release. So, I think finding somebody to.

talk to um who you trust and. you know, like you said, just beating. yourself up is is. it really isn't in like you're spending. so much time trying to make good. decisions and write decisions for you. and for a potentially have a a a baby, you know? So, be decent to yourself. about it. Be decent. Let's talk about. And just like that, we're back. We're back. Um, what was it.

like returning and playing Carrie? Cuz. like I was thinking about it, you've you. were gone obviously for a while in the. show and now you guys have been back, but like is it weird? Does it feel the. same? Like how how do you feel? Well, when I first started talking to. Michael Patrick about it, it was. March of 2020 or April of 2020. And. um I started talking to him about.

potentially. doing a podcast because we had he and I. had never talked about what it took to. make the show. And. I thought it was a nice idea to kind of. do like or could be potentially. interesting to do like an all access. backstage pass to like really what how. do you produce this show? Um and in the. course of those conversations. he said. why aren't we just doing the show again? And I said.

wow I can't believe you said that. because every time I had come up prior. to that it just never felt like the. right time. But when we were all at. home, um. I felt like everybody was looking for. home in a way that they weren't. experiencing in their home. And that. meant their friends. Like what people. really missed. um outside of like being with family, which for some people was a really great. experience, but they missed their.

friendships outside of their family. And. we thought, well, that's why it's right. now because everybody's looking for. home. And Carrie's always been looking. for home. And the way she tries to find. that is with her friends. Like, how do. they guide you home? And so, in theory, it felt really good. It It. was terrifying. I mean, the table read. was so happy. We were all so happy to be. together again. Like, it was a perfect. day. But I was really nervous for the.

first two weeks, 3 weeks of of of our. first season. And I am typically anyway. at the top of every project. Doesn't. matter how many times I've played a. part, you just are constantly like, wait, is this how I walk? Is this how I. talk? Is this No. Is this how she walks? Is this how she talks? Um, you know, does she run this way? Um, what's what. feels right and correct now? So that's.

just the way I examine everything. anyway. But did you watch any of the old. Sex in the City to remember anything? No, I've never seen most of it. I've. never watched the show. I watched it in. the beginning and there was a period in. which I was getting. um dailies and rough cuts from the. studio, but I finally begged off because. a I wasn't keeping up. Michael Patrick. wanted he's like, "You've got to watch. You've got to give me notes. you got to. watch it. And then I realized that I. wasn't being helpful because it was so.

unpleasant for me to watch myself that I. couldn't see the work completely and. that's not a good producing partner. I. was able to be a partner in lots of. other ways. So I would say. easily by second season I wasn't. watching at all and I've never seen. almost anything. I saw the final episode. ever because Michael had a screening of. it live as it was happening live which. was pretty incredible but that's just. was an opportunity for all of us to be.

together. Um and I think the only time I. understood that the show. was in the world in the way it was. because we had been so. kind of purposely cloistered from too. much chatter you know peripheral blah. blah blah. So was I came home from. seeing that episode and that was season. 6. So, I hadn't seen almost anything up. to that point after season 1. And we.

turned on the we were just the news was. on and under the what do they call that? That Yeah, like the banner. Yes. News. banner. It said uh. Carrie ends up with big on CNN. And I. was like, did they know who Carrie is? And they. know if they say big, what that means? And John, maybe they said John. And I. only then thought, "Wow, that's making a big assumption.

that there's going to be people in the. broader world that know who Carrie is.". They do, honey. Oh, they do. Did you of. all the years that you were away from. her, did you miss her or were you for a. while at ease with like Yeah, it's okay. I always feel good when we stop because. I feel as if. Michael's been so clever about like if. somebody said to me, "Do you miss her?". I'd say like, "Yeah, no, I think she's.

well.". You know, we'd leave a season. I'm going. to cry. Or a movie and I would think, but she was she seemed really well last. time I saw her, you know? So, I always. felt like he left her in in in not in. good hands because she's in her own. hands, but having sorted things out and. finding a kind of contentment that is. sustains a person and those friendships.

I trusted would remain even if they. change and they do. Um, so I didn't miss her. I always felt. that Michael. that we, you know, did right by her in. this moment cuz I feel like it changes, right? What do you hope your legacy will. be within the Sex in the City. franchise era? Gosh, I never thought. about me. Um,

suppose. I hope the work is good. Like I really. do care about the work and I think I. care because um of the audience like I. feel. such a. a debt of gratitude that will never be. able to be paid back properly. Um so the. work matters because for all these years.

people have. paid to have us in their home. They've. actually paid to have us in their home. And they were the gang of 10 million. from the beginning. It was slow, but. they were. um. they were as much a part of the show as. we were. And so I feel for me the work. that has been so important to me is in.

large part about the audience's work and. time spent with us which is equally as. important and the two cannot. we can't exist. without. them and the commitment they've made and. so therefore I made a commitment that I. would care about every little detail and. some people make fun of me on the set. for the kind of vigilance around detail. and but I think it all adds up and the.

audience. sees and knows it all better than I do. So it's beautiful. Last question. Okay. Really? Oh, that's so sad. I know. I. know. I could stay here all day with. you. No, no, you got to you got to go. home. In what ways has playing Carrie. Bradshaw shaped you as Sarah Jessica. Parker? Well, I suppose in ways that. don't really matter, in ways that. matter. Um, so sometimes on a seemingly surfacy.

level and then more so in ways that. matter, the idea of breaking rules. think I learned very early. um that Carrie is a rule breaker and. when she's doing it saratorally with. clothing it's people love it and then. sometimes when she does it in her. interpersonal relationships it's um been. not as successful or it has been because. she was willing to risk convention and.

be herself. So I would say I came to. look at rules different because I was. somebody that always followed rules. Like I really did believe in them. because I felt that they were um. like a kind of constant that was good. for us and. Carrie didn't always and there was a lot. that came that made her life better by. being completely herself. Um but I'm.

wary you know I wasn't unaware of the. ways in which it was harmful even if. briefly. Um, so that and I would say. that though none of us have the time. that she has had to devote to. friendship, um, I so admire. the way that friendships are like. foundationally the most important thing.

And a lot of us have spent a lot of time. working. And I always have had friends. that were important to me. But I was. envious of the way the time and the way. she took care of those friendships. And. it made me want to be a better friend. It taught me even if I wasn't able to. mimic it cuz life doesn't give us time. to have lunch all the time with our. friends. No. But even if you put aside. that kind of luxury of time.

and leisure, it's still like. it's still something to aim for. I. agree. I cannot thank you enough for. sitting down with me. I feel like I'm in. a dream right now and I don't know when. I'm going to wake up, but like this has. truly been such an honor. Like again, I. just have to reiterate it. From me starting Call Her Daddy to now. actually getting to sit down with you, I. have chills. I've had so many chills. throughout this interview. Thank you so. much for giving me the time and sitting.

down with me. It Thank you for having. me. Thank you. And I'm really really. proud of you. Yeah. And it sounds like. you're so. you're you're you're so healthy about. the the way that you're looking at your. life. And um I'm sure it's a huge source. of comfort to a lot of women that listen. to you who are also contemplating. in their lives some similar things. But. also even if they're not, it's like. guideposts. So, um, thank you for the.

way that you've connected with millions. and millions of women and men. Yes, men. We didn't forget about you. And thank. you for having me and being so. hospitable and lovely. It was a real. treat and safe travels home. Woo! Thank. you. We did it. [Music].