Malin Akerman: The Hunting Wives, Hustling & Healing

What is up Daddy gang? It is your. founding father Alex Cooper with Call. Her Daddy. >> Malin Akerman, welcome to Call Her. Daddy. >> Thank you very much. >> Okay. I have loved you for so long. I have. loved you in so many of the roles that. you've played. 27 Dresses, The Proposal, Billions. >> Oh, I love it. Okay. >> big Billions girl.

My whole family and I would watch it. And now obviously most recently The. Hunting Wives. And that has just been. a phenomenon in itself. And I'm just so. excited today because obviously yes, we've seen you in so many different. characters. But I also want to get to. know you just like as a woman in the. industry and talk about all the things. So I am happy you're here. >> I'm so happy to be here. >> You're obviously a very well-established. actress, but I heard that you hosted a. good party. And I need to know if it's true that you. have a disco ball in your house in LA.

>> Not only do I have a disco ball, I have. a smoke machine and a laser machine and. a DJ deck. So I am set up for a dance party whether. we're five people or 25. >> You have a smoke machine. >> have all of it, honey. I love to dance. and so does my husband. >> Walk me through what a party is like at. your house. Are we doing seated dinners? Are we doing. >> It depends on what we're feeling. If. it's like New Year's Eve, we'll do a. nice seated dinner and I'll do a nice. meal. I love cooking. I love I love I. love a party. If it wasn't this, I.

should have been like a wedding planner. Um although I don't want to deal with. bridezillas, so maybe just like a party. planner. But I love I also just love the cash. I. love making a great cheese plate and. lots of dips and and you know just picky. food. Um and then we'll have some. cocktails. Um or many. And then whenever we feel like the all. my friends dance. They're all dancers. And even husbands who don't really dance. get on the dance floor. Anything from. like I've got a.

sort of array of stuff that we all know, like Robin and you know, like all the. classics. And then we go into a little. bit of like deep house. And so we get. the night really going. And then I have. a friend of mine who also DJs, a. friend's husband who's phenomenal. Then. he goes real deep, and then I get to. dance. So we we like trade off. It's. amazing. >> sounds like you have the coolest friend. group. You're like, yeah, we do a little. deep house, and then we've got the DJ. that comes in. Do you have like a. signature cocktail? Are we doing wine? Are we doing. >> So I'm a ranch water girl. I love a good.

ranch water or a dirty martini. Not too. sweet, because then it gives you the. worst hangover, too. I've learned my. lesson. So just a little I do all the I. got my girlfriends got me We actually. just moved to Connecticut this summer. So I'm I'm about to put my disco ball I. have my own disco room in the new house. So one day you'll come over. It's going. to be a '70s den. It's going to be. awesome. I'm very excited. >> my god, you're a Connecticut girl now. >> I am. It's very hard to say that. I I. keep saying to people like, I'm on the. East Coast, real close to just outside.

New York. I'm a New York girl. >> Yeah, and they're like, no, no, no, no, no. >> you're Connecticut. But yeah, we made the move. >> East Coast, and some of my family lives. in Connecticut, and I just it's a very. different world. But you know, Shonda. Rhimes lives there. And so like, okay, some of you are. populating that area. We got some good. actresses and like showrunners over. there. >> there's a lot. There's a lot of artistic. people who moved into the area where the. where we live. There's like an arts. community, an actual like visual arts. and clay making community. So it feels a.

little bit separate. It just You know, we have a 13-year-old boy. And our boy. is a nature boy through and through. I. called my husband yesterday. I was like, what are you guys doing? He's like, I. haven't seen our son for 5 hours. He's. out with the neighborhood kids biking. with their fishing rods on their bikes, going to different ponds and fishing. It. is a dream. So it's a dream. >> kid. He's a nature kid. >> that's what we want. And we're like, what? We're going back to the '50s? This. is amazing. And I get to go into New. York whenever I need that little like. kick, you know? >> Okay, well, speaking of nature. >> Yes. >> because I remember the first time I.

watched Hunting Wives, and I was like, I. had no idea, obviously, what to expect. I don't think any of us did, honestly. And then when season one came out, it. was so new and different, and it was a. different take. I feel like we haven't. seen this on television. It caused a lot. of conversation. >> Sure did. >> When you first read this script, were you immediately like, yes, put me. in? Were you hesitant? >> I was definitely hesitant. >> Okay. Why? >> Mostly because I just wasn't sure. For.

me, it's so much about the tone. I wasn't sure if it was like. a very kind of. campy, you know, desperate housewives. Like, I. wasn't sure what we were making here, if. it was making fun of itself or if you're. in on the joke or like so all of that I. went, this is like it's walking a really. fine line. And I but I but I do have to say this, when I first started reading it, I. couldn't put it down. Sort of like the.

binge-worthy television that it became, it was the same thing reading the. script. So after episode three or four. of reading it, I looked at my husband. and I was like, can you please read this. because I need to know if this is good. or bad because it's like a good bad, but. a bad good, and like where are we at? He. couldn't stop reading. He's like, are. you kidding me? This was like. tailor-made for you. You have to do. this. And I was like, wait, when you say. tailor-made for me, what part do you. mean? >> Get specific there, buddy. >> Wait a second. And it's not your fantasy.

reel, right? Because this is there's a. lot going on. But I really. I then met with Rebecca Cutter, our show. creator, and Irwin Stoff, our producer, and they kind of laid it out and they. were like, listen, we need this to be as. grounded as possible because the. situations are so wild. that if we bring in these characters as. real characters, but let the situations. be the crazy bit, then I think we can. make a really great show. And I was. like, I'm in. I'm in. I 'm in. I 'm in. >> That makes so much sense because I, obviously, as the consumer and the.

viewer, we're watching you guys and we. see the final product, but I can't. imagine seeing like the bare bones of a. script. That is interesting. I also. heard. that the pegging scene for you, you were. like, hmm, some there's something there. too. >> Oh, that made me want to do this show. even more. I mean, I'm not the one doing. that scene, which also made it better, but I was. like, wait a second. I personally have. never seen this on television before. It's probably out there, but I was like, this is so brave. I love it so much. I.

think this is so true to so many. relationships as well, and nobody's. talking about it. So I was like, this is this is a brave. woman putting this out there. And like, how exciting to have this sort of sexual. freedom and change the narrative a. little bit. of what's on television right now. >> I completely agree. Also, your. character, she is a very sexually. liberated woman, which is again exciting. to see on television. What was it like.

leaning into that part of that character. and. the amount of nudity? Were were you. like, oh, let's go? Were you hesitant? >> I really love the depiction of a woman. who is sitting in her power, um, and who has this sexual freedom and. who has a relationship with her husband. that allows this. Again, it's one of. those things where you're like, I have. spoken to many people who have these. kinds of relationships, guys. It's not. but it the narrative's not out there. And so, you know, minus some of the. crazy, like not the murderer and not.

the, you know, the. but like people I feel like, um, just I would love an awakening of it's. okay, like let's just talk about let's. talk about sex, baby. >> I I agree. And I also feel like. something that really. hit well for me was like, it feels like. we're watching a show that is portrayed. through the female gaze. >> sure. >> And that to me has been fascinating. watching something be so yet again, you.

know, pushing the boundaries we're used. to watching through the male gaze. Yeah. like, have you and the other. >> actresses talked about how to bring that. to life? >> Absolutely. That also was a big. conversation we have. It was all female. directors, which was really cool. Um I'm. always a person who says like best. person for the job. It doesn't. But this has been really great to have a. female showrunner and creator, uh female. directors, women that I get to work with. who I adore, who are phenomenal.

actresses. So to be able to have these. conversations with our lady directors. and go, what do we find sexy? What do we. think would look beautiful? How can we. depict this so that. it's something that is sexy and wild and. women will watch and go, yeah, okay. Um and I feel like I feel like we. succeeded in that. I feel like it was. really beautiful and sexy and soft and. wild and like all the things that I like. to watch. >> It is fun to watch you bring that to. life. >> is. It's wonderful.

>> Um I love Britney Snow. I've had her on. the show before and I just I love. following her career and I feel like all. of us became obsessed cuz we're like. your guys' friendship. I feel like we've. seen you at basketball games together. We've seen you kind of like hanging out. and I just need to know like what was it. like when you guys first went from being. like, okay, we're going to do this job. together to like, oh, we actually may. have a friendship here. >> Uh it's been the most beautiful. friendship journey ever. She really is. one of my closest friends now. I feel.

like she's. more of a sister than anything. Like I. feel like she's really family. Um I know that's weird to say about. someone that you're making out with all. the time, but. uh I just adore her as a human being. As. an actress, I think she's incredibly. talented. But we, you know, we didn't know each. other. We didn't even get a chance to. like do a chemistry read or meet before. doing this show. So we all got out there. maybe a week or 10 days before we. started shooting. and Britney and I just went, okay,

should we go out for dinner and like get. to know each other a little bit? Um and there was just uh. we right away, I think we both I I know. she'll say the same cuz we've said it in. interviews. We both sat there went, oh, this is going to be great. We're going to do just fine. There was. like, we were laughing, we were trauma. bonding, we were, you know, all the. things. And and, you know, especially on those days with. the intimate scenes, it's really. important to have somebody that you feel. like you can trust fall with. And. there's no agenda, there's no one out to.

like make you look bad or it's just this. beautiful It's It is a beautiful love. story that's kind of paralleling, you. know, real life. Our friendship just flourishing and I I. miss her when I'm not around her. I. can't wait to go back to work. Um, and so we feel so fortunate that we. all are so supportive of each other and. it's amazing what women can do when we. support one another. >> Yes, it is. Amen. >> Rule the world. >> Amen. Call Her Daddy is brought to you. by SoFi, the everything app for smarter.

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yes, I've watched you in so many roles. And that's why I was excited to talk to. you today cuz I'm like I want to get to. know more about you. So I guess take me. back a little bit. Like what was your. life like growing up? What was the. dynamic in your house like? >> So I was born in Sweden. We moved to Canada when I was two years. old. um because my dad We didn't have a lot. of money, so my dad got a job offer. It. was actually between Toronto or New York.

and he chose Toronto cuz he thought it. was better to raise kids there. So I. could have been a New Yorker. But I I loved growing up in Toronto. It's a great city. Canadians are very. nice. Um and then he got another job offer. that was offering a bit more money back. in Sweden and he wanted to go back. My. parents were already kind of on the outs. and my mom wanted to stay in Canada. So. it ended up being, you know, there's always like the silver lining is. always there in everything because it. meant that I got to spend three months. out of the year in Sweden. I'd go every.

summer, March break, Christmas and spend. that with my father and then be with my. mom during the year. Um so you know, it was kind of like a. single mom situation and then my stepdad. came in, my first stepdad who I adore. and they had a child together and my dad. remarried, had two girls. I've got a. really like eclectic family. Got three. siblings that are half siblings. >> It's always um when there's a divorce in. the family at a young age, I'm always so. interested to know like how was it. explained to you? Like did you know why. they were getting separated?

>> well. I mean, I was only six to be fair. I. can't really remember. I just remember. the moment though because we were in. Sweden and my dad was like going into. this new office to check some We were. there for the summer. And I can't. remember how it came up, but my mom. ended up spilling the beans and saying, you know, your dad's going to stay here. and he's going to because he got a job. and you and I are going to go back to. Canada. And I started bawling my eyes out. And. my dad got in the car and was like, what. just happened? She's like, I told her. what's happening. Um and I just remember.

my dad, he's the most positive human in. the world. He's like, but you know what? It's going to be great because you're. going to be here all summer and you're. going to So you know, it was just. I didn't know anything about the. dynamics of their relationship or what. had happened. And to be fair, it was. very amicable. They went to each other's. weddings. They like they're still. friends. We've spent Christmases. together. So it wasn't um. it wasn't jarring in that way. Uh which was really nice. >> course. Something I also think is. interesting is like when you sang kind. of growing up in a single parent.

household for a while with your mom, I. know you've lightly talked about how she. struggled with depression growing up. But I'm curious like how did that How. did you make sense of that at a young. age having your mom? I know you've said. like some days she would put herself in. a room and be gone for a couple days. >> Yeah, that was It was tricky. I was a. teenager by that time and this was after. the failure of her second marriage, unfortunately. So. we we were back to just being the two of. us in the in the house for a little bit.

And I think the tricky part was it was. so taboo to talk about. mental health, which nowadays is like we. have mental health days. We have It's. amazing. I let my son has learned so. much in schools. You know, going to. progressive schools, they it's all about. feelings. But back then it just I mean, especially. my mother's generation, there was no. such thing as going to therapy and like. working on that stuff. So it wasn' We just didn't have the. dialogue. She didn't have um you know. the words to explain what was going on.

to me, nor did she have the energy you. know for people who know anything about. depression. It just sucks the life out. of you. So it was tricky just because. as a kid you manifest it very. differently and you don't and you. sometimes make it very personal and. you're like, is it me? Am I doing this to this person? Um and obviously like over time and. going to therapy and her going to. therapy and we now having the words for. it and the dialogue and the sensibility,

it's been beautiful to like. go on that journey together. But back. then of course it was hard. It was sad. to see her. I feel terrible for her that. she. was going through that and I wasn't able. to be there for her as a cuz had I known. what I know now, I would have at least. been able to understand it and support. her from. which in whichever way I could. >> Totally. And I think that's what is. helpful about talking about it when. we're at a place where we have. perspective, right?

How do you think it shaped your. personality at the time un like. subconsciously or consciously? >> But I think. there was an understanding at a very. young age that I needed to look. elsewhere for some sort of mentorship. to. um understand who. I wanted to be in life and what I wanted. to put forward. as a growing woman. So you know um. it's this this my analogy is like having.

a suitcase and unpacking the suitcase. and going, oh this is mine and this is. not mine and like I need to get rid of. that and that narrative or that story. that I've been telling myself or that. because it was I would say my teenage. years were confusing. Um. but I also had really great friends and. really great people around. Um and we had a blast. Um and I traveled. a lot as a teen. At 16, I went to Milan. for to do modeling and I went to Spain.

and I went to Greece and. all on my own. And that's when I think. about that and I look at 16 year olds. now, I'm like, that's insane. >> No, I. when I was researching, I was like, hold. on. You so you started also, from what I. understand, living on your own at 16. >> Yeah. I was on my way out to move to. Toronto. We were living in a small town. outside of Toronto and I was like, mom, I'm actually going to go in and get. roommates cuz I'm going to model for a. while, for the summer. Um and I was on. my way out to do this this like journey.

for myself and then I ended up staying. and getting an apartment and. just kind of my dad helped me with that. with the apartment. I just had to make. the money to like buy the groceries and. do the everyday stuff. >> 16. >> yeah. >> moving out. that is like. so young, but also shows like you had. this part of you like you said you were. kind of trying to discover obviously. yourself. You're looking for who do I. want to be? Who am I? And the modeling industry, from what I. know, it's like you want to get in it and then.

you're in it and you're like, wait, wait a second. I know you've. talked about this before, but I do think. because there are young women that. listen, if you don't mind just talking. about like there was this like chaperone. situation that I know and I've had some. conversations with models before about. like the model homes. Like can you. explain what these chaperones were. supposed to be doing for you? >> Yes, I can. Um so I didn't have to have. a chaperone because I was 16 or 17, which I think there's like a cap there.

where maybe you have to be 15 in in. Europe to be considered an adult. Depends on where you're going. But any girls who were younger than that. and there were 13 and 14 year old girls, their parents had to sign them off to a. chaperone. And that chaperone would. bring them over to there was like a BBC. undercover documentary on this later on. And it was the guy who we used to get in. his car. He would take us to the clubs. and feed the girls cocaine and.

>> And he got so mad. He took the light. stand and threw it at my head. He just. missed. I walked out of there. The next on.

Monday, I walked into the agency and I. was like, hey, this is what happened, by. the way. This guy's crazy. You need to. like get rid of him and and they were. like, what do you want us to do? He's. the best photographer we've got. That. was it. I was like, so you're going to. send 13, 14, 15-year-old girls there and. they're not going to be able to stand up. for themselves. It was. wild. >> It's just so wild too because I think. somehow we still are a little bit like. used to just being like, oh, that's kind. of like what happens and then you just. try to get out and you're like, no, this.

can't be normal. This should we. shouldn't have to be in these positions. as young girls. I also feel like a lot. of times that can happen to women when. you are being made to feel like you. should just be so grateful to get the. opportunity. There's like a manipulation. that happens where you feel really small. and you get really quiet because you're. like, oh, I guess I'm I shouldn't speak. up. And I just had this conversation. with another actress where she was like, they would pit us and the women against. each other so we kind of wouldn't talk. about it. And then all of a sudden you.

start to be like, hold on a second. I. think this is happening to all of us, but it takes a second. So, oh, wow. >> It's manipulation. It's also just that. control thing of um. you know, again, it's you don't want to. be blackballed. You don't want to. especially girls who are trying to make. it their career. They're like, I don't. want to say anything in case I don't get. the chance to become the next supermodel. or whatever. So, >> I wrote down, which I thought was so. interesting I've heard you talk about. before, um how Swedish culture and like. this Viking mentality and how they.

empower women. Can you explain a little. bit about what that is? Because clearly. it feels like it's helped you in your. life. You being 16 being like, um I just. had a bad experience with this. photographer. We need to report this. Like I'm like, okay, Malin, tell me. about that. >> Um I think. first of all, I think that's one thing. that I'll. tell you about my mom is that she's a. freaking Viking. Like she goes to the. dentist she's and she gets a root canal. and she doesn't get freezing. She's. like, I want to know what you guys are. doing. Like, we're not going to joke.

around here. Like, you got a root canal. without freezing. I won't go that far. She is a true Viking. But I do think that there's something. and I don't know if it's a Viking. mentality or not, but there's um. >> No. >> about this with my husband trying to. like wrap my head around it, but just. it's almost like you have a parent and. they go here are the here are the things. that like here kind of the rules, but uh. that the things that work, but you do. what you think is best for you. And. that's how everyone's grown up. So. there's like this logic and and there's.

an equal playing field for men and women. is what it feels like. And I've noticed when I've been there. that the women are more the aggressors. when you go out than the men. The men. kind of like sit back and are a little. bit shyer and a little. Again, we're talking about like the '90s. when I was out being single in the '90s. But there is something about that where. um it just felt like. women took what they wanted. And that. was really cool. Whereas here there's. this I've been talking to like some. young girls when I've been on sets and.

they're like. I my friends are telling me don't reach. out to him because that's too desperate. or that's I'm like, what are you talking. about? Do you like the guy? Call him, text him. Why are we playing this game? But there's a different type of. um language over there than there is. here uh around sort of who approaches. who. There's no three-day rule of don't. text him back or like you like a guy, you go get it. You like something, you. go get it, you know? >> It is crazy though to hear of like the. way that.

you can be conditioned at a young age. and how much it can impact you and how. much you can actually set these young. women and young men up for more success. when it's like ingrained in them from a. young age. If you like something, go get. it, you know? It doesn't have to be. gender appropriate. >> Yes. >> Yeah. >> Okay, so we end up kind of like moving. on from modeling. We go into acting. You move to LA. Did. you know anyone in LA when you were. like, I'm going to become an actress? >> No. I had But I convinced my best friend. to move with me. She was also like.

dabbling in it. We were bartending. together in Toronto, putting ourselves through university, and the modeling kind of picked up. And. then there that turned into like some TV. commercials and then some really small. roles on really shitty Canadian TV. shows. And then I got an audition and they flew. me out to LA to do a like a screen test. And I didn't get the part, but there was. a manager who was like, hey, you should. come out to LA. I think you'd really do. well. And so I turned to my best. girlfriend who was also my roommate at. the time, who I was also bartending.

with. And I was like, babe, let's just do it. We're 23 years. old. Like. we're bartending. School can wait. We. can come back to it if this doesn't work. out. And she did. So it was just the two of. us, us against the world and this. manager who kind of took me on and was. sending me out on auditions. Nothing happened the first. however long, year. I got nothing. >> How were you making money? >> It was like residuals and stuff from. like back when we had worked in Toronto.

And sometimes And she got one job like. an MTV job, which was great. And so she. brought in some We were a couple. Like. we we put down a down payment on. apartment. We had no money for. furniture. So we like fluffed all our. sweaters on the floor. That was our. mattress. We got two buck chuck from. Trader Joe's. Um we You know, it was. four for one um ramen noodles. We'd go. to the bank in the morning and get the. little free muffins and coffee and. pretend like we're checking our bank. account, which we didn't have. It was so much fun.

But it took a good. Well, it took a while. I then was like, this isn't working. I met these guys who. were in a band and they're like, do you. want to be the singer of the band? And I. was like, yeah, sure, why not? I don't. sing, but And they were three Italians. and like, we will teach you. And I was. like, okay. So we did the band thing for. a year and a half, did the whole LA. circuit. >> That's so I love how you just casually. like, yeah, and then these like three. Italian men were like, do you want to be. our lead singer? And I was like, oh, what were you singing at open mic night? Literally nothing.

>> It was I went in there because he was. doing some sort of. Oh, I had done I That's right. I did get. one job. I got one like really tiny. indie film for zero dollars and the. guitarist was doing the ADR, although. like. um. audio work for the film. And that's when he's like, do you sing? And I was like, no. And he's like, well, let me test. your voice. Would you like to sing? I. was like, who doesn't dream of being a. rock star? Like, let's be honest. >> Malin, wait, and do you have a good.

voice? No. >> That's why I didn't make it as a singer. It was fine. It was fine. >> band though is where you met your. ex-husband. >> That right. He's the drummer. >> and he did not speak English at the. time. And. >> spoke English. >> And you did not speak Italian. >> no. >> So. logistically, explain to all of us girlies, how did. you. >> You guys have heard of language of love, right? >> Yes, I'm like, how did you guys like. flirt? You're using the dictionary? Like.

>> We sure were. There was before before. smartphones and we would do our day. session and then at the end of the day, we'd grab a bottle of wine and a pack of. cigarettes and we'd sit on the balcony, him and I, and we would like He had a. few words and I spoke French so it was. like I could kind of understand certain. things, but we literally had a. dictionary and we're like learning each. other's languages. >> Oh. >> It was really romantic. It was really. fun. It was really You really get. engaged in the person. You know, when. they're with you, you are really with.

them. Um. and nothing to distract you. And then of. course, we were just We were physically. attracted to each other and there was. something there that was just bringing. us together. Um and we were also the. only two single people in the band. So. it worked out well. >> There you go. Call Her Daddy is brought. to you by Shopify. Daddy Gang, you know. I'm a little skeptical of the internet. at times, aren't we all? But one thing I. absolutely love is how much easier it.

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So six years after you guys got married, you had your son. Um and then you separated only like four. months after that. What kind of led you. to make that decision? >> Oh, so many things. It it wasn't what how we planned it. And. for anyone who has had children or who. is having children, uh there's um there's a beautiful quote. that I read that and I I will I will. paraphrase it, but it was from a a.

mother and she said, you know, allow. yourself to mourn the fantasy of what. you thought it was so that you can step. into the joy of what it is. And that I. really held on to that because. a child changes you. It changes the. dynamics in your relationships. It takes. a really strong relationship to keep. that together. And we just didn't have that. Again, we kind of. simulated what my mom and dad went. through. We're still friends. We we just. went to Italy. We all hung out together. and my son was with his papa. Um but it was just that thing where we.

both sat there and went, this doesn't. work with us as parents together. But it just unfortunately became so that. we couldn't work it out. >> Is there anything that you have advice. on of like what do you think. conversations should happen before you. have kids with people? >> actually. >> Tell us. >> I really think that, you know, there's. for me anyway, we were young, you know, we met in our 20s and um it it was just. kind of the whirlwind.

love story of you fall in love, you get. married, you have kids, and how. beautiful life is. Well, it doesn't work. that way. There's communication is is. key and I know we've all heard it. before, but we were not communicating. I mean, we barely spoke the same language. So, you know, just we hadn't talked about. parenting, how we wanted to parent, what that. looked like for us. We hadn't talked. about what our schedules might be like, who is going to be home, who is going to. be out, who is. any of the logistics. Like there was.

nothing. We were so naive stepping into. this. So it was really the mindset of. two very young people, young mind-setted people and and also um. you know, what I've learned over the. years is my own stuff where I was very. happy to kind of keep everyone at an. arms length. That was sort of the. survivor in me where I was like, I got. this cuz I've gotten this my whole life. So I'm not going to let anyone in. I got. me. And that's hard when you're in a. relationship. You can't do that. And I had to learn that. I had to learn.

the intimacy wasn't just physical. The. intimacy is is the dialogue that you. have with someone and we just didn't. have it. >> That's such good advice though because I. agree with you that sometimes especially. in young relationships, you think you're having the. conversations and then when a child. comes or something, you hear people be. like, we literally never talked about. parenting. And then you're watching your. partner and it's not even their fault. They're just doing the thing and you're. like, wait, I don't like how you're. doing that or I'm doing this and this is.

how I was raised and you why are you And. then all of a sudden it's like so hard. to keep the train on the tracks cuz. you're also like we need our priority. needs to be this child. But what about. us? And so that makes a lot of sense. >> Yeah. >> Also, how did you process for anyone. maybe going through a similar situation. of. simultaneously the end of a marriage and. also entering motherhood at kind of like. the same time? >> Girl. It was a lot. It was a lot. And again, I. think from my dad, I've always tried to.

see the silver lining. Um. was it hard? Yeah. Um to be going. through a divorce. I just started back. at work. I was now bringing my son with. me to work. Luckily, I was. producing on the show that I was. starring in. So my office space turned. into a nursery. So I the beauty is I got. to have him with me every day. It was. lovely. Um. but it was really hard to. be mourning the end of a relationship,

doing a comedy, stepping into. motherhood, being up all night, feeding him, you know, and then going to. work. Um but I had a best girlfriend of. mine who moved in with me when he was. six. So two months after my husband and. I split, my best girlfriend moved in. with me. She ended up living with me for a year. and a half because she works from she. can work from home. And it was. the best experience we've ever had. Um we were so sad that we weren't.

couldn't be lovers. She's more like a. sister. I wish I wish I was sexually. attracted to her. It's like this is the. perfect relationship. But then we were. like, but maybe that would get in the. way of this relationship. Anyway, we. loved it. We had the best time. And it. is where. the um the dance party started as well. Every Sunday, I I have a neon sign and. it says Sebby Sunday. My son's name is. Sebastian. And it became Sebby Sundays because. every Sunday I'd invite all the parents, all my friends, and and non-parents come. over, hang by the pool, pop the rosé,

kids are roaming around. This is great. Put the kids to bed. The music comes. out, the disco ball goes on, and we. dance all night. And we like dance our. troubles away. And it was the best, most. cathartic. It was like celebrating the. good things in life, you know, and. seeing the community that I had. versus seeing the losses. So it was a lot, but after, so I had. like two years of that. and then I had a a year of. of reckoning where I was like, okay. I started doing transcendental. meditation, learning how to do that. I.

started doing some deep deep therapy on. figuring out who I was, what my intimacy. issues were, why I was keeping people at. arms length, how to kind of navigate that, and just. shifting and seeing who I am now in my. 30s as a mother, single mother in the. world, and what does that mean to me? So it took some time to figure that out. >> Well, first of all, I love that you. leaned into your friend because I can. imagine there's so many women that are.

like, note to self, if it doesn't work. with my husband, make sure my best. girlfriend moves in with me to help. raise my child in those beginning days. That is like it's like a TV pilot. I'm. like ready to sign, right? >> about that too. We're like, should we. write a show about this? >> is the dream of all dreams. Um I want to. talk about a little bit about cuz I know. you yes were in that relationship for. almost 11 years. So then to come out of. that, focus on career and your child, and then you eventually did meet your. husband, Jack.

But through all of this, first I want to. know what drew you to him? >> Mhm. Well, so Jack, funny enough, I had. known him over the years because he's my. sister one of my sister's. husband's good friends from England. They went to drama school together. So. he would come into town. I met him twice. before like that third year where we met. and everything clicked. But he had come. over to my pool where we all hung out. >> With the disco ball. >> disco ball. Um and I had met him and I.

was like, nice guy, cool. Obviously was. like not in the headspace. He had a. girlfriend. Um but that third year where. he came back into town, we had all gone out to Hamburger Mary's. for drag queen bingo. and had a blast and he sat beside me and. we just got into conversation. It was. after the year of my like self-care. year. And I was still in the mindset of like, honey, I'm never getting married again, never having a kid. I have a rolodex of. people I can call up anytime for a booty.

call and I'm loving life right now. He I was like, if you want to be part of. that rolodex of booty calls, all good. You can be part of that, but you are. seven years younger boy and you are. going back to England, but you are super. cute and so and it was that moment where. I was like, he's really funny and he's. really lovely and. so that's when I asked my. now brother-in-law I was like, tell me about Jack. Like is he is he. this good of a guy that he's like. putting out there? Is this an act? And. he goes, no, he he actually is a really.

great guy. And I was like, okay. So we started. dating and and I had told him like, come. on over, hang by the pool, but let's not. be physical in front of my son. Um and you don't have to try with the. kid because you're not going to be his. dad, like just chill. But he came over and him and my son were. like. they were just drawn to each other and. they had so much fun together. And of course, my heart just went. oh my god, look at how he is with this.

kid. It's unbelievable. But we had many conversations that I. never had with the ex where I was like, listen, if we're going to be dating for. a little while, I'm testing some new material out. I 'm. trying to be vulnerable. I'm trying to. be intimate. I'd like to share stories. with you that I usually don't share with. people because I feel like that puts me. in a vulnerable place, but I'm. practicing it right now. And I would. practice it with him and he would just. go, that's it? And I was like, wait, you're not. you're not getting up and running away.

because it's because of how crazy these. stories are. So it was really um. it was it really shifted a lot of things. for me because he's an incredible. communicator. And he really you know, I think between. girlfriends you can kind of like read. what's beneath the water line where. you're like, how are you? And they're. like, good. And you're like, oh, it's so. not good. He does that with me. He sees. me through and through, and I've never. had that in a relationship before. >> Well, what a blessing also to have done. the year of work that you're talking. about and started kind of on this. self-discovery journey, then to meet You.

have to believe also that. maybe you wouldn't have looked at him in. that way had you not done the self work, right? >> him I met him two years in a row and. like none of that. It was like cute, sweet guy, but nothing happened there. And then once I came into myself and you. know, it's that the universe provides. You do your work and then it kind of. gifts you. >> It does. Is there anything you can share. that. you had really not explored until you. got into therapy that you're like, oh,

maybe this is holding me back? Like why. do I do that in relationships? That's a. pattern that I need to break. >> I think it was the protecting my heart. I think it was I think it I think it was. having. my father who was like my everything as. a kid. moving to Sweden and and as much as it. wasn't abandonment, it felt like. abandonment. You know, it's in the fiber. of your DNA. You can. logically you can understand so many. things, but your body has to catch up.

And I think that my body was protecting. itself from abandonment. And so I think. in any relationship, I was just. putting my hand up and going, don't get. too close. cuz I also you're obviously going to. leave at some point. And I said that to. Jack too. I was like, I've got I've. figured this out about myself that. I will try to push you away just to. prove to myself that you're going to go. And he just went, okay. I'm just going to stay. And I was like, okay. And in my head, I'm going, you're. not going to stay. It was just it was.

wild what was happening and I was just. The beauty of going to therapy is that. you garner an awareness of the dialogue. that you have in your head and you're. checking yourself and you're and and. both Jack and I are huge fans of Esther. Perel. >> Love. >> so we talk a lot about her stuff and. she's like, you know, the in a relationship, there's three. people. There's you, there's him, and. there's the relationship. And you have. to treat it like its own thing. So we. have these really cool conversations of. like. how I'm doing. Like this is my I'm.

so sorry this is coming up and like I'm. dealing with it, but this is why I'm. acting this way. Or sometimes I'm like, hey, your shit's coming up. Deal with. it. And then we're like, we need to talk. about our relationship. So it's really. we speak the same language. >> And I think what's so also amazing for. anyone who's listening or watching that. is in their self-discovery, trying to. get into therapy. era essentially. What's really. incredible to hear is that yes, you were. doing the self-work, but it also did. take a partner who was willing to.

respect you on that journey because I've. been in relationships prior to my. husband where. I was in therapy. I was trying to make. progress. And then when you're hitting. the wall with someone when you're trying. to do that and it's not working, like. I'm sure on those dates that you were. going on and the boys for the booty. calls, you're like you're not completely. not open to talking to them, but they. weren't giving you clearly anything that. was worth your time or your energy, right? >> wasn't even at that place yet. >> Okay, you're like I'm actually not. talking to the boys. >> even I was really keeping them. I really.

knew what that was. And I was. okay with that. >> And I love that for you. >> a time and place for just having fun, okay? >> You deserved that. >> it after 11 years. I was like, I can do. whatever I want. >> And you do deserve that. But I do think. that's beautiful to like have met Jack. and been like. okay, now I'm going to test material on. you. Literally like I'm going to try to. see if what I'm working on. And it. worked. >> I was I was just talking to a girlfriend. of mine who just got out of a. relationship and she's like, I'm out in.

the dating game and like, what do I do? I was like, girl, just say the things that are on. your mind so that they know exactly who. you are, what you stand for, what are. your values, what like so that they know. who you are. And if that doesn't fit. them, then they can go and you're on to. the next. Because I think so often. we get attracted to someone physically, you like drawn to someone, and then you. want to make it work. You want to fit. yourself into that square, you know, and. and you're like around or whatever. You. know what I'm talking about. Thank you. You know what. That thing. We all know it. We've all.

done it. We've all done it, and a lot of. people live in that. And then eventually. that doesn't work out. So I I that's the. other thing where I was like, I think. that it's just that thing of. as honest as you can be and practicing. because you can go to therapy and you. can work yourself out, but once you get. in a relationship, that doesn't fly. anymore. You have to It's a whole other. animal. You're dealing with someone. else's stuff too, and you have to. understand how to do that. You have to. practice your own stuff that comes up. because we we mirror each other.

>> It's such a good point. I'm so curious. now though because you said at the. beginning when you met him, you were. like. never getting married again, no more. kids, how did your. view on marriage evolve as your. relationship evolved? >> Oh boy. Um. it was really wild because it was the. first guy that I had been with since the. the divorce that I within weeks was. like, I want to have a baby with this. guy. And my body was like.

yearning to have a child. And And I kept. asking myself like, what's wrong with. me? I didn't want another kid. What's. happening? Um so there was something just out of my. control that was really pulling me. towards him. Um and I think. you know. we just really fell hard for each other. And he had never been married before. Um and over time we were just talking. about sort of the logistics, which is. unromantic, but just about him coming. into the family and being.

a stepfather to Sebastian. and what that looked like and you know, being married makes it easier to travel. with the kid. And like, you know, there's He's gotten pulled into. interrogation rooms at the border. control when he's just traveling with my. son when he was young. So on a logical. in the in sort of in that sense we were. like, we should probably get married, but also we both wanted to get married. We wanted a celebration. As you know, we. both to dance. We're like, what's the. best celebration we could do? Um, so we.

actually um had this happy medium where. we we went to Vegas, got married in Vegas, Little White. Wedding Chapel officially, went and saw. Cirque du Soleil cuz one of his brothers. is in Cirque du Soleil, and then we got. married and did the ceremony and. everything and had his um one of his. best friends officiate in Tulum on the. beach barefoot and had a dance party. >> Like what is happening right now? You're. like I am. >> can hang. >> No, I was going to say I'm like it's the.

discos, it's the it's we're going to. Vegas, we're going to Tulum. >> We like to have fun. We like to bring in. the joy. >> Oh my god. Oh wow, that's really cute. >> So it was great. >> Is it true that I think I read this. where you had said you didn't want to. use the word forever in your vows? >> I didn't. >> Explain. Explain. >> So again, going on this this honesty, vulnerable, intimate journey um with. myself and with my partner, I just said, you know, if we're going to.

get married, and I'm doing this again, I. want to do it. in a really honest way. And I don't want to say forever because. it doesn't always turn out that way. And. that's okay too, and I don't want to be. held to that. I want to be held to this. chapter right now and what we're going. through. So I just want it to be the. most honest. set of vows that we've ever said um of. where we're at right now. And so we did. cuz I was like, I feel like I'm lying if. I say forever cuz I I can't see the.

future. I have no idea. And I also don't. want to stay in this relationship if. it's not working for us anymore later. later on in life. But in all honestly, if it doesn't work out with Jack, it's. not going to work out with anyone. >> we're done. >> Then I'm good. >> That's it. >> Communing with my girlfriends, whoever. wants to come in and out, bring it. >> Call Her Daddy is brought to you by. Airbnb. So the other day, I was just. scrolling on my phone and one of those. one year ago today notifications popped. up. I usually don't pay much attention.

to them, but when I saw it was from my. Napa trip with Lauren, I obviously had. to go back through every single photo. I. remember we drove up to Napa for a. weekend and found the cutest farmhouse. on Airbnb to stay in. The location could. not have been more perfect. It was right. by a vineyard and overlooked this. beautiful golf course, which yes, Matt. was very jealous of. During the day, we. went wine tasting like a little cute. couple. Then we brought our favorite.

bottles back to the house at night for. cozy long girl talks on the couch. Obviously, I. haven't had a drink in forever since. being pregnant, so I cannot wait for. wine nights again soon with my. girlfriends. And now that holiday travel. season is finally here, all of my group. chats are going off with everyone trying. to coordinate dates and just figure out. where we're going to stay and where. we're going to go next. But looking back. through those photos reminded me that.

some of the best parts of a trip happen. back at the house, right? Like that's. why I love booking a home on Airbnb. It. literally gives everyone space to just. spread out and it makes every trip feel. more relaxed. You can even order. groceries, which I love for your trip. through Airbnb, and have everything from. breakfast essentials to holiday snacks. delivered after you arrive. If you're. planning your Thanksgiving trip or any. holiday travel this season, definitely. check out Airbnb before you book.

>> Okay, your son is now 13. >> Mhm. >> When it comes to identity, I am curious. because I feel like everyone like a lot. of women I've talked to talk about how. when you enter motherhood, you kind of. go through like your identity shifts. And there will be times where in again. newborn phase and who am I and what am I. doing in my career? Like. in what ways has your identity continued. to evolve as you as your own individual. while also being a mother?

>> Um. I think that in the beginning, it's that. again, it's the For me, it was that loss. of freedom of my life. It's gone. The. life Life as you know it is no longer. So you got to say goodbye to that. That's why I kept going back to that. quote like mourn the fantasy that you. thought it was going to be and enjoy. what it actually is. And it took a. minute to. get into the rhythm of becoming a mother. again just because I was dealing with so. many different moving parts. >> Yeah.

>> But. when you really start to step into it. and you are present to what. motherhood is, it is. so incredible to get It's almost like. you get a second lease on life. Like you. get to live it all again through your. child's eyes and with even more feeling. Like it's like you feel double because. it's for them. And it's It's been really wild because. my identity is very much linked to my. son. It's like walking out without your. jewelry on. I feel naked when I don't. have him. Oh, that sounded weird, but.

you know what I mean. >> I get it. I get it. I get it. >> But it's like um uh a piece of me is. missing without him now and he's so much. a part of my life and my identity and I. love that about who I am. I love being a. mother. Um, I I think it's actually really. beautiful and powerful and there's. something sexy about being a mother, about stepping into this womanhood that. I feel really. Again, this is just my personal journey, but I feel like.

I'm complete. I. I've done the things that I wanted to do. um as a woman and uh feeling like a. woman again, like a grown woman versus a. young girl. Um, and that's what. motherhood taught me is to just. step it up and maybe become. more aware. >> How do you think it's changed your. perspective on your relationship with. your own mom and everything that she. went through? >> I think it changes everything.

You You really have more time for. everything. You know, when a teenager, we're all brats at some point and our. parents are the worst. Um, and then when you yourself become a. parent, you go, oh, this is. it's hard. It's hard. And we're only. doing the best that we can. And I have. most certainly messed my son up in some. sort of way. There's going to be. something he's going to want to talk to. his therapist about. one one day if he wants to get a. therapist, but it's just like. you get so much more um.

understanding and uh. I I think you just kind of loosen the. grips a little bit and you are grateful. for what they did do and you see them as. people, I think, more than parents. It's. like these are people who are just who. tried their best. >> Right. >> And I appreciate that and thank you. >> Talking about finding silver linings, you've referenced that a couple times. and I know you were saying like your dad. always found the silver lining and I can. feel that energy from you which is so. refreshing and positive that you're.

trying to like always look at how can we. look at this in a positive way. When you. look back at all of your life. experiences and what made you who you. are today, um how do you just overall. apply that mindset? And if you have any. advice for people who are kind of maybe. going through it right now and need a. mindset shift? >> It takes a long time. >> Yeah. >> I think we have to look at. what our. inner dialogue is. I think it's that. whole thing of um.

your mind is so powerful. And we speak to ourselves in such a. brutal way, I feel like. It's we say. things to ourselves that we'd never say. to anyone else. And we have to stop it. I think it's being aware. It's taking a. bird's eye view of how you're operating. in life. What's not working for you? Change it. If that's not working, do something do. it differently. Um, and that's easier. said than done, but it's baby steps. It's little by little of just. have a different dialogue with yourself.

Try something different. >> I feel like I've had so many. conversations with women about how when. we were younger and you're this young. girl and obviously we are told by. society like our value is when we're at. our prime, which is like weirdly like 18. and 21. And like. >> So creepy. >> not your prime. >> It's literally not your prime. >> Nope. >> All the women that I have sat in this. room with it it just I just feel like I. just keep finding out more and more. about how life just keeps getting better. the more experiences you have and the. older that you get. Like how has.

womanhood. gotten better for you with age? >> Cuz you don't care what people think. anymore. You can't please everyone. You. really really can't. And that's also who. I am at the core or was at the core was. such a people pleaser. It was like this puppy dog just going. love me love me love me I'll I'll shape. shift I'll be a chameleon I can be. anybody you want me to be. That's gone. Once you start getting. older and you're like oh wait a second I. don't have to do this for anybody. You either like me or you don't. I'm.

trying to be a good human but if you. don't like what I'm doing or what I'm. saying then. be gone, you know? >> I know. Um let's let's finish out with. season two. Um I can speak for everyone. and I know I can speak for everyone when. I say we are so excited that we are. getting this season two. I cannot wait. to just binge this. I'm just so ready to. see you all back on my screen. Is there. anything you can just like lightly tell. us about what to expect? >> Um it is so hard to this I always find.

the hardest thing to do because I want. to give it all away to you. I want to. tell you everything. Um. it's. equally as crazy as the first season. You're not going to be disappointed. There are new people have come in. There are people who are going to die. Um there are some. shocking moments which I don't have to. tell you because you know what this show. is but like.

what was different for us about second. season is we were reading the scripts as. we went along they were being written. whereas first season it was all one to. eight was written we knew what was. happening. So we would get script sometimes and we. would sit there and go, oh my what? This. this is happening? Wait a second. We. call each other and we're like, oh my. god, can you believe this? So it so it's. we got to experience it hopefully the. way you guys are going to get to. experience it. But yes, there is. one specific moment that is.

shocking that you everyone will be like, I can't believe they just did this. Yeah. >> Oh my god. Okay. Now I'm like, okay, bye. I need to go watch it right now. You said that you, you know, tried to. keep Margo's character grounded and not. let her kind of become this caricature, which we talked about at the beginning. of this. But how did you intentionally. bring that to life this season? And like. did you approach anything differently. than the first season? >> I think there was.

I think Britney will say the same, all. of the cast members, we felt a lot more. secure walking into this season. We knew who these characters were. We. weren't trying to find them just like. the first season. We also knew how it had hit with. audiences. >> Yes. You're like, this is. >> loves us. No, but it was so great. We. were like, this is so nice to have an. audience base and going, oh, we we want. to satisfy them now. We're like, oh my. god, we want this to be so good for. them. You had someone to like fight for. You know what I mean?

Um but it was it was the same rules. where we there were some really crazy. situations again. And Britney and I we. spend a lot of time. figuring out how to make some of the. dialogue that is crazy. feel real because we just don't want to. bring it to that other side. >> um. where we're in like an SNL skit. But we we worked a lot together on. finding the real moments and.

making it as believable as possible in. these unbelievable situations. So it's. yeah, it keeps it you try to keep it. grounded and. and you have to for yourself in order to. do that, um. figure out a way in the mind of Margo. Banks that this makes sense, that this. is a real thing. >> I see. Um the wig situation. >> Yes. >> You know, the wig situation caused a lot. of conversation after season one, or it.

it was like the first episode and then. it continued. How are we feeling about. the wigs this season? >> Love. We we we upped our game this. season. >> Okay. We got budget. >> We got budget. We got a real wig maker. who really knew what they were doing. It. I I mean, I'll let you guys be the judge. of it, but I really think there's a huge. difference and I think it looks great. >> I love that for you and I love that for. us. >> Yeah. >> You previously said in an interview and. you've kind of talked about it that like. this cast has just hit it off and you.

guys would hang out every weekend and. the nights that you could and it was. just so fun. Are there any just like. little fun memories that you can kind of. share with us that happened during. filming of season two? >> Oh my gosh. Well, we went to Charleston, South Carolina. for Britney's 40th birthday. >> OH. >> It was all of us. We all went. We rented. an Airbnb. It was so special. We spent a. whole weekend. We did the little petty. cabs, you know, and.

just had that was one of my most special. moments filming season two was having. all of us together. in Charleston, which by the way is one. of the most beautiful cities in the. world. The food scene there is. incredible. >> And it's great for a birthday party. >> gosh. We. and even Dermot came out and danced with. us cuz you know there had to be dancing. Britney's a dancer, too. We love her. dance moves. We went out after dinner. and we're like, let's just see if. there's anything. We walk into this. place and they're like, oh my god, it's you guys. Let us get you a table. And I was like, it's her birthday. They.

brought out champagne and it was just. this impromptu party at some outdoor. patio in Charleston. I look over and Dermot's in the corner. dancing and girls are coming up to him. and I'm like, this is the most. the wildest, most beautiful um. spontaneous night that had, and everyone. had a blast. And, and by the way, everyone that was coming up was so. lovely. We had another gaggle of girls. who I think was a bachelorette. This. woman who's getting married to her, um, uh, her like sister's best friend or. something, and they were all just right.

in front of us, and we started this big. dance party. So that was like, I know. it's not a set thing, but it was with. all, all, all our cast, and we had a. really nice time. >> I feel like what we now know, >> Yes. >> I said at the beginning of this, I said, you know, I'm so excited to meet you. because I was like, oh, I can't wait to. know the woman behind all of these just. like iconic characters. And now I know. that Molly Ackermann, you are going to. find her dancing. >> Mhm. >> There's going to be a disco ball, and. it's going to be a good time. If you run.

into her, or if you're lucky enough to. get invited to one of those parties that. she's hosting now in Connecticut, oh, everyone's going to be gunning for you. in Connecticut. They're going to see you. at the grocery store and be like, what. are you doing on Friday? And you're. like, you might get the invite. >> ball on? It'll be turned on. >> I can't thank you enough for coming on. I am so excited to watch this new. season, and you are so talented. I love. watching your character bringing her to. life. Obviously also can't wait to just. see what more you do with your career,

but thank you so much for your time, and. it was so nice meeting you. >> you. It's so nice to meet you, too. You're so lovely, and.