Lauren Graham: Lorelai, Love, & Life Lessons (Full Episode)

What is up, Daddy Gang? It is your. founding father, Alex Cooper, with Call. Her Daddy. Lauren Graham, welcome to Call Her. Daddy. Thank you so much. I am such a. fan. Oh. This is so epic and so fun, and I. think that my fans, the Daddy Gang, are. going to freak out that we're in the. same room. That's really, really nice of you to. say. Thank you. I'm excited, too. How. are you doing today? Um listen, I was. running a little late. Um it's raining.

in California, which always freaks. everybody out. And um but I'm otherwise. good. No, everyone acts like we have to. like all stay home from work when it. rains. It's like no one leave your. house, or none of us also can drive, apparently. No, everyone gets very stressed out, and. it's hard to but it also looks really. pretty, and you know, it makes the air. feel healthier. True. Okay, you live in LA. What is the. most LA thing about you and the least LA. thing about you? I live in LA and New.

York. I still have a place in New York. that I've had for a long time. So, I'm. I'm endlessly like asking that question. I think one extremely LA thing is to be. really freaked out by like 1 in of rain. Yep. And it is a thing to like really. have long conversations about what. freeway you took and why. So true. Um and. uh and it's just very LA to be like, "Oh. my gosh, it's 70°. I'm freezing.". Like that has become like now I go to. the East Coast, and I can't I don't know.

how I ever lived there. I feel the same. way. My parents recently have been like, "Alex, shut the [ __ ] up. You literally. grew up in Pennsylvania. You went to. school in Boston. You lived in New York. Yeah. Why are you cold? It's like. 60-something degrees." I'm like, "I need. a I need like a parka.". I think it changes your body to live. here. I don't think it's our fault. I. think that you just do become more of a. wimp. I agree, but like we're so. fortunate to have this weather. Like I. want to stay in it forever. And then the. least LA thing about you? Um, I don't do yoga.

I try I've tried. I'll try again. I just. can't. People are like, "Oh my god, the. yoga place." I don't know why I'm. making impressions of my friends, making. them sound like ding-dongs, but like, yeah, I can't do I don't know I don't. know. It's so slow and. It's too slow. I also can't do it. I. don't also do hikes as often as I. probably should when everyone's like. hiking. But yoga, I'm the same way. I'm. like, and hot yoga? Yeah. Truly [ __ ] off. Right. Okay, when you aren't working, what is your. favorite way to spend an off day?

Well, I. um. really have enjoyed because I worked for. a big chunk of the year and I'm I'm in. kind of a newish house that I haven't. like gotten I haven't gotten to spend a. lot of time there. I really love doing. very little and my favorite thing about. my house is I put uh cuz the I put the. coffee machine where the bedrooms are on. the bedroom level. So, I get up I get out of bed, I go boop.

to the coffee maker, I get back in bed. and I do like every New York Times. puzzle. I'll read. I'll like I just the. luxury of not having a 5:00 a.m. call. time is just really a wonderful You. saying that just made me realize like. we're all doing it wrong. It's like, why. is my coffee machine not. We obviously you played historically. like a character that was obsessed with. coffee. What is your coffee order?

It's well, it's gotten it's it's pretty. it can be anything. First of all, I'll. drink coffee from the gas station. I. don't care. And And also, I'll have like. really coffee with like a lot of, you. know, footnotes on it. Like, can you and. also but the thing that I do around. holiday time. So, the coffee is just. coffee. I like this vanilla creamer and. then I've started being this person. which is I have. whipped cream in a can, and I put. whipped cream on top of my coffee and. cinnamon. It's the best thing you've.

ever had. And and I the whipped cream. was just like for holidays. I was like, "Certainly no one can just have whipped. cream on their coffee. That's just. decadent." And then I just kept it from. Christmas. It's so good. No, every time. my husband sees me, he's like, "You're. making a milkshake. That's not a. coffee." And I'm like, Shut up. Yeah. Watch yourself. I'm having a nice. morning. Yeah. And he just drinks it black. And. I'm like, "You're insane." Okay, wait. So then was that like a huge part that. you just like randomly brought to. Lorelai? Like did you or did Was that.

already written as the character? It was. all written. It was all there. The. coffees, I mean, it's in the first. episode, right? She goes and he's you. know, demands more coffee and he's like, "You've had enough." No, that was just. there and um you know, like it was one. of the many kind of serendipitous. aspects of that part and that time and. that character is like we just shared a. lot of traits. Okay, I'm going to move. my coffee machine upstairs. I don't know. how I'm doing it, but I'm doing it. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by.

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by May 14th to be entered for a chance. to win. And for every friend you refer, you earn an additional entry. Just $10 a. month or at no cost with direct deposit. Before your acting career took off, you. worked a lot of different jobs. Can you. share some of your favorite ones? I mean, none of them were all They were.

all on the, you know, it's hard to do. something in service of the thing you. want to do, but you're not there yet. Um, but I didn't I didn't hate being a. waitress. I. I liked the I like anything where you're. moving and the time goes by really. quickly. I liked being an apprentice at. Summerstock even though like during the. day we had to like clean the bathrooms. and paint the fence and stuff, work the. box office. Um but that was just like we.

were all kind of in it together. It was. like a fun community. Um I liked being a. tutor. I was a tutor for the SATs and. stuff. Oh my god. Yeah. Wait, that's a flex. Wait, no. Lauren, that's like I It was a little. bit Sure. I mean. really the reason I got the job is. because I had a car in New York City. I. and they were like, "Oh, we'll send her. to Far Rockaway or whatever." But I like. working with kids and and we weren't. even that far apart in age. I was like.

right out of grad school and I'm working. with like high school kids. So So they. were all kind of okay. I worked retail. I worked at Barneys. Oh, you did it all. Okay, let's talk about Gilmore Girls. Okay. I'm the biggest fan. Like I feel like I. go back and forth. It depends usually. time of year. I'm like it just is end of. September. It's about to be October. Boom, hit it again. And I just saw that. according to Netflix people spent 500. million hours watching the show in 2023.

I'm like, "Oh, I'm 100 million of those. hours." Um how does it feel to know that. this show is still just so loved? It. feels really good and and also it's hard. to it's hard to comprehend. It's like. I feel really lucky. I feel like um. honored and um it's just kind of crazy. I don't. cuz where does it go from here? Like how.

many generations, you know? I feel like. though it will have like it has this. lasting power because the themes are so. relatable and the world that. was built is so genuine and safe feeling. which I think like. depending on what's going on in the. world like for me like when I need a. show that's going to make me feel good. I'm turning it on and I think especially. in the next couple years people will be.

like replay replay go back to episode. one like I to me that maybe like. everyone has a different experience with. it but like why do you think it. resonates with so many people? Everything you just said I think it's a. safe place to visit and. you know it's aspirational without being. saccharine I mean this mother-daughter. relationship's really fun and positive. but it has its bumps on the road but I. do think it's the writing as well which. is kind of meets you sorry meets you.

wherever you are if you're young person. you might miss some of the. references and get some of the. wit of it kind of as you get older but I. think there's a it's almost to me and. this is what it was like performing it. it has a musicality to it it's it's. almost theater in a way I feel like how. densely packed the. dialogue is but how kind of it takes you. along like a song does you know and and.

so I think it's it's something in your. brain that like playing a song again. like you can kind of listen to it again. That's such an interesting way did it. feel like that when you were. Yeah. It's like it's own world. essentially of what you guys have. created can you explain the moment to me. that you realized holy [ __ ] this show is. a hit It there was no moment because it. was a very slow burn and continues to be. like like you know I remember. driving I guess my window was down or.

something I was at a stop light and like. a more trucky driver guy was like, "Go. more girls." And I was like, "Unlikely, sir. You're an unlikely, but. I love it." And so it there it was a. really slow burn. That is the best where. you're like, "Not the demographic I. thought we were hitting.". You can't believe how many men are like, "I know it's uh you know, it's not for. me or it's not designed for me." And I'm. like, "It is for you. You should start a. support group." Like, you know, there's. Yeah. Um okay, one when you got the.

script initially, what was your first impression like now. in hindsight of Lorelai? Like in that. moment, you remember? I was really struck by the sense of. humor in in the in the writing and that. it was cuz you have to remember this was. a we now have. many more dramedies than we did then and. I don't even know and and even. when the show started picking up steam. and getting submitted for things, there.

was always a discussion every time of do. we submit it in comedy or do we submit. it in drama? It doesn't really it is its. own kind of thing and but it's that tone. that I. love the most and it did not occur to me. although it occurred to many other. people in my work life that she was a. mom. Like that wasn't the thing that. struck me that because a lot of people. then I was 30 I turned 32. on the pilot, I think or right before.

and people were like, "Don't play a mom, that's the end of your career. Like you. should you know, play whatever. girlfriends, you know, until you. can't do that anymore or whatever, you. know, that was more like play the the. play the girlfriend." And and I was. like, "Oh, I don't think of this. Mom is. not Mom can be so many things, you. know." And and I just really I. recognized. the language. Like like it was somebody. speaking to me. I was like, I know that.

person. Well, I love how you brought it. to life though because even you saying. that, you're right. I guess someone. could read on a page and be like Lorelai. is a mom, but I'm like the way that she. had this youthfulness about her. Not. even saying it yes, like you're young as. a woman at this point and still, but. it's like the energy you were bringing. and her independence and her own. storylines were so. she was an individual and she was a. mother at the same time and I think you. brought that to life and it was very.

inspiring as a woman to watch that. character because her life didn't just. revolve around Rory even though it. revolved around Rory and it felt very. refreshing to see a single mother who. had her own life and her career and her. struggles. Like it I loved it. Like I. loved watching two women of different. ages work together to this like common. goal of trying to find happiness with. each other and individually. I loved it. too and I think the the aspect cuz you. could have just stopped at the premise.

being oh, she had her as a teenager, but. it it was also therefore allowed for. them to have a more truly pure. relationship except for when, you know, somebody needed to. to put their foot down and we did it for. each other in a way and you buy it I. think because that's the whole thing of. the show. They're friends who are also. mother and daughter. They're mother and. daughter who are also friends and. beautiful. Yeah. In what ways did you relate to Lorelai?

And like how does that work in a script. where you're slowly learning more about. the character and you're learning about. yourself? Like what was the through line. for you? I'm trying to think now. There was one. in particular in the maybe first or. second season where I was like, are they. are they just like stealing from my. life? Like and it was probably in. I mean of course there are some besides. I was not a mom, but many parallels of. like. dating. career, you know, setbacks, dealing with.

parents. I mean, it's just all. relatable. It it is the wonderful evolution in. television where the more the writer. gets to know you. I mean, you're always. playing hopefully the best thing you can. get in especially TV show that's going. to go on is you want to be the voice of. the creator of the show. You want to be. that character who. you know, is them speaking through you. kind of that's where you get the most. juicy kind of material. But also as they.

get to know you, they start writing for. you even more and that's really fun. Fun. and scary where you're like we know you. just heard me gossiping over here. How. is that in the script this week? Get. away from me. I've like sat with actors. sometimes where they're like I had to. like stop talking about my personal life. cuz it'd be in the script and I'm like. Right. No. Well, you always hear that. about like Sex and the City and Friends. and stuff. Yeah, I I felt that less on. Parenthood where which I love I loved. that character and I loved that show. too, but. I would get frustrated on her behalf.

sometimes. I'd be like, "What? Can't she. not have a win? Like what I mean, she. did have wins and and and had, you know, such a beautiful relationship to her. that family too, but. Sarah Braverman. Come on, Sarah. You. know, Sarah needed more wins than. Lorelai. Yes, right. And different. Different. Okay, what was. it like the first time that you met. Alexis aka Rory Gilmore? Well, it was. it was literally on our way to the table.

read because. they had waited for me. because I was on another show. So, by. the time they cast me they were ready to. go, ready to shoot and we went to Canada. and I met Alexis in the lobby of the of. the. of the hotel and we just always really. got along. Oh my god. I was really. lucky. That is kind of incredible and. also hilarious of like this relationship. that we all feel like we grew up with, whether people wish they had that.

relationship with their mom or they find. similarities or differences, and it was. like such a. heartstring puller, then it's like. you're like, "Oh, we quickly met and. then we got off to the races." It. worked. What do you remember of like. those first few scenes shooting with. Alexis? Cuz like did you feel the. immediate chemistry? Were you guys. trying to figure out your vibe together? No, I mean, I I think we did just feel. the immediate chemistry, you know, we. are very different energies. She is a. shyer, quieter person, which is perfect.

cuz I think if you had two loud mes, you'd not have a good balance, and I. just really liked her, and I she just. had like a lot of natural ability. Okay, I'm going to ask you some rapid-fire. Gilmore Girls questions. Stars Hollow is. so iconic, obviously. What was your. favorite place there? Um. not. the town hall cuz it was so hot in there. always. It was like 50 people. Um you. know, Luke's was always fun. The scenes. in there were always fun.

Um. it always just had a lot of like energy. I used to get phone calls from like my. cousins who'd be like, "How many times. are you going around the gazebo?" Like. you've been like we'd just walk around. the gazebo a million times. So, you. know, you just get such a sense memory. of all these places. Um my house was. always fun, and the kitchen was always. good good scenes in the kitchen. Um it tended to be, you know, in the. house where like we'd have some good. watching TV sitting on the couch with.

giant cheese puffs in front of us. So, The best. They were all they were all really cozy. town hall. I'm dead. Um okay, which castmate is most like. their character in real life? Um, Kelly. Well, no. Gosh, everybody is and isn't, you know? Um, like. Kelly has that part of her, but she's. warm. She's She's, you know, regal, but. way warmer than than Emily, who who does.

who had warmth in there. Yes. Okay, what Lorelai line is most. often quoted back to you? I mean, oy with the poodles already, I. guess. That's good. That's good. Okay, Lorelai. has some amazing outfits. Did you ever. use your own clothes from your own. closet? I did. I think that that Everybody Loves. an Irish Girl T-shirt that was my. introduction to Instagram. Yeah, guys, I'm haven't even been on it. a year yet. Really was really waiting to. just make sure it was going to stick.

Um, I think that was mine and. occasionally. But, you know, you're going to work at. 5:00 in the morning and like so it I. wasn't I wasn't uh. bringing in anything good. Also, like my. clothes are not Her clothes are more fun. than My clothes are not fun. So fun. Okay, what storyline was a little hard. for you to get behind? There's a year. when Alexis and I are in a fight. Rory. and Lorelai are in a fight for a long. time and and we would talk about it and. Amy was like, you know, you can't do a.

show for this long and not have. conflict, but it I forget even what the. conflict was, but it went on for a. while. And that's the one that I would. hear from people that they didn't they. didn't like that. Which of Rory's boyfriends do you think. was the best fit for her in the long. run? You know, you can't get me. I won't be gotten here or anywhere else. I'll never say. They were all good fit. for her at the time because they were a. learning experience. Oh my god, you're. so.

That's the right answer. No, I learned. from even the frogs. The frogs. Um, okay, which of Lorelai's partners. did you like the best? I mean Luke is. the right answer for sure. Yeah, Luke. Yep. Okay, you previously said you did not. date Scott Patterson, obviously, who. plays Luke in the show, but you did date. a couple of the other guys on the set of. Gilmore Girls. I know you're not going. to tell me. Can I ask though, was it. anyone that Lorelai ever dated? Yes.

And dating's real big word for. for some of the experiences. But you know, you're there 14, 15 hours. Who else are you going to meet? No, are. you kidding me? I love that for you. Okay, quickly want to go through some. memorable scenes. Can you tell I'm a. fan? And like hold on. I'm like wait, just one more time. No, actually it's good if you don't. Like. let's get through it. Okay, I'm going to. give you a moment. Tell me what you. remember, any behind the scenes, how you.

felt, whatever it was. Okay, when. Lorelai and Rory get hit on by the same. guy at Luke's Diner. First scene of the. pilot. Well, that really was the scene. that was the hook of the show. Weirdly. or. I had never seen that scene before in. anything and I thought like that's. really creative. That's a great way to. introduce that these are, you know, people who are close in age and. I I I did sort of feel like that's the I. can still I can remember it really well.

Um. You know, it was one of the first. scenes, if not the first scene we shot. at Luke's Diner. I don't know. I felt. like that that was a really fun. The kid. playing the kid was really cute and. Alexis was like, "Are you my new daddy?". Like speaking of Call Her Daddy. Um and. I don't know, it was just really fun. It. was like the hook of the show. It was. amazing. Okay, when Lorelai and Luke. finally have their first kiss. When was. that? You guys are like on the porch. I. think it was the. season four finale. You guys are on the. porch. Season four, you like pull away. You're.

like, "What are you doing?" And he's. like, "Would you just shut up for a. second?" And then he goes in. That's so. hot. I know it was. Oh, it was so hot. I like re with like. rewind, rewind, rewind. Cuz like the. build I love how you say that soon. I'm. like. I was waiting since day one. Day one. Okay, when Lorelai starts dating Rory's. teacher. Well, I think we've learned. both from Lorelai and Sarah Braverman, don't date your teacher's kid. I when I. was getting ready for this I. I know I forgot about that. I was like, "Sarah and Lorelai both dated.".

Doesn't work out. No, it does not. Okay, when Rory slept with Dean after he got. married. She did? Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, I remember. I remember. I remember. I remember. I remember. I remember. Oh, I mean, there are these things where. Yeah, that was bad. That was very out of character for her. It was. But sometimes you got to switch. it up. Okay, when weekly dinners with. Richard and Emily were the price for. Rory going to Chilton. I mean, it's. tough because I don't want to wreck.

anything for anybody. I loved those. scenes. They were a real bear to shoot. cuz somebody's eating here and. somebody's eating there, somebody's. eating here. You got to move the camera. all the way around. And so they would. take a really long time and you'd sit in. front of that like fake fancy food and. you know, but we we would just That was. also. so key to the show to so you know, so we. we loved them while they took a long. time. I didn't even think about that as. like when you're in production, like.

you're like, "I'm Which I guess could. then kind of in a positive way like add. to your annoyance where you're like, "Shut up, Mom." And you're like getting. annoyed cuz you're like. it and it does it's it's an interesting. exercise in continuity because as you. know, the hours tick by. what are what's your emotional level? Where did your elbow go? Like so there. was a kind of you're right, like. constraint in there or something that. like you had to keep doing this the same. exact way and yet keep it fresh.

Which is kind of indicative of how you. were actually supposed to be feeling. while you're shooting that scene. So, okay, there we go. I used it in my work. Um okay, you talked about how you did. not realize that the sea season 7 finale. was the end of Gilmore Girls and I. cannot imagine emotionally just be like, "See you guys tomorrow." or see you guys. next season and then it ends. Like. what was that last day like for you? It was really emotional. We had our. wonderful director Lee Shallat-Chemel. who was like, "Guys, you know, I'm going.

to do a shot at the end that mimics the. shot that that is in the pilot that sort. of pulls away from Luke's and we're like. there in the diner." She's like, "In. case this is it." And the whole year had. been really emotional. We were very lost. without as good the as writers we had. that we were kind of lost without Amy. and Dan. The show just didn't feel the same. We. couldn't even It was like, "Would it. Should we try to stay? Should we try to. keep going?" Like it, you know, and it's.

not up to the actors. So, there were. many many many conversations and it just. did feel like. you you want to be able to say goodbye. to something and we didn't get to do. that. Obviously the show came back for a. revival, but like when you did walk. away, how did you feel knowing like, "Wow, the. Gilmore Girls era of my life is over?". Well, it didn't happen until a few weeks. later. There were still conversations. going on. Who knows how that decision.

ultimately got made, but I was at a. restaurant and the waiter came over and. was like, "Your agent's on the phone." Which was. very dramatic and glamorous. I was like, "Oh, excuse me, my agent's on the. phone." And I went and picked up the. phone at the bar cuz I guess I don't. know what was going on with cell phones. then. And or why he knew where I was or like. why I don't know any of it but and he. said it's over. And I didn't know how to feel and I. didn't know, you know, later different.

a couple different cast members said, you know, you didn't call me and I was. like, oh god, I didn't wouldn't even. have thought it was my job or my. place to call anybody and. tell them No, and that's what I think is. like nice though to hear cuz I think. people would be like, what do you mean. you didn't know? And you're like, no, I'm literally sitting there and I didn't. know. Um so you guys come back for the. revival, what was it like playing. Lorelai again? It just made me so happy. It's so. um.

God, it would just made me so happy. I I. I was like on a little cloud the entire. time. I because it was such an. opportunity that you don't get very. often to do a not a do-over but like get. to return to something with people. feeling enthusiastic and you know it's. going to. be completed, you know, it's not a. pilot. Um it was just an incredible. opportunity and. I don't know, everything about it was.

just it was the most probably fun I've. had at work. The show ended on a bit of. a cliffhanger. Do you. the biggest I was like, wait, what? How. are we Wait, do you think that it could. ever come back again? I think this is. just my theory, I do not know. I'm this. is how much I'm superstitious or. in love with the show is like there are. questions I could probably get an answer. to that I have never asked. Like I never.

asked because Amy said from the. beginning she knew what the final four. words of the show were. She knew from the beginning and she. didn't get to do it in season 7 that it. had to wait until like she knew that was. the the the those were the final words. I never asked her. I didn't even ask her. when we were shooting that episode of. the of the show. I don't think I asked. her until cuz it wasn't in the script. Cuz it's what Mom, I'm pregnant? Mhm. Mom, what I'm pregnant? And she didn't. put it in the script because she didn't.

want it to leak. So she would she just. told us when we kind of got there. And so. it did feel like a cliffhanger. I think. it was. I think maybe the thought was we. would go into another season then. But I have never asked and I don't know. Why don't you ask? Because I don't know because I'm scared. I don't know. I because because I guess. I feel like if that didn't happen, was. that like I don't know. Like I don't.

want to know I don't want to see behind. the curtain of like did they not feel. like doing it? Did Netflix not feel like. doing it? Did did were they we waiting? What were they waiting on? There's just. a little bit of movie magic that I would. like to maintain. That's fair. Yeah. Do you have your theories of who. you think the father is? Are you going to tell me? Well, there are two theories and and. either one, I'll just speak as a. producer type now, could could send the. story forward. It could be the Wookie.

who she. fools around with in the in that. storyline. It could be Logan. And either way, it's juicy. Either way it's juicy. Yeah. That's. fair. I know. There could be some. one-night stand which then what does. that do to her relationship to the guy. she's maybe, you know, was going to go. down that path or it could be. could be him. This is good tea. Mhm. Um okay, you. obviously also starred in another one of.

my favorite shows Parenthood. I can't. tell you how many times I have rewatched. that show. Really? Oh. Because that's what I was. going to wonder is is that a rewatch in. in way it's not in the same way, but I. don't hear that as much that people. rewatch it. Different, I have to really want a show. and I that I want to like dive into and. like feel something. Yes. Like, I can't. do that when I'm like stressed with work. and I'm like all I'm like Gilmore Girls. When I I go through it like every few.

years. Yeah. My mom and I will be like, "Are you starting it again?" "I'm. starting it again." "You're starting. it?" "Oh, well, then I'm going to start. it again." "You playing episode one. tonight?" "Okay, I'm playing." And we. like live on opposite sides of the. country. So, I'm like, "Go, go." And. then we like gush over it and it's the. best. Um how would you describe your. relationship with that cast? Well, I mean. varied. Oh, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Um and um but predominantly. uh like just it was.

it was the most easy filming experience, which. you bond to some degree no matter what. But, when something's easy and and. and you're just have a lot of time to. just sit around and chit-chat, like. that's just so fun. How lucky were we. that we got to. you know, make this show where it was a. very different way of working and it was. a much looser kind of um.

way of working and they each have their. merit and they each like belong to the. kind of show it is. And I just love I. just love everybody, truly. And and you. know, in particular had the fortune of. Mae and Miles being. a child of mine adjacent. Like, they're. incredible friendships that have that. have lasted and you know,

my friendship with Dax, I don't see him. as much, but like there's just some. really wonderful people. Every scene was. so much fun to do. Um. It was just really fun. I was recently. with Dax and Kristen and. I was like, Dax, can you just give me. like 20 minutes? Just give me 20. minutes. And Kristen, I apologize. We. need to talk about Parenthood. He's. like, ask me anything. Let's go. I'm. going one by one. I'm like, tell me.

this. Tell me that. Because it's as a. fan, that world that was built of that. family and the chaos and the beauty and. the pain and the fun. Like, you can't. help but feel one parts of yourself and. your own family in it. Or two, it really. does kind of take you out of your own. [ __ ] that you're dealing with and. you're like, oh, this family is [ __ ]. insane. I love it. Like, but you also. want to be a part of it. And there was such pride, I'll say,

amongst the cast. Everybody in their own. family unit really had their own thing. and their own kind of language, their. own way they did things and and, you. know, so it was. easy when we would all get together to. have these sort of. organic conflicts and, you know, ribbing. and kind of fun and like, it's a really. good group. Okay, yeah. I know this is a. little broad, but if you have anything. that comes to mind, like, looking back. at your time on that show, is there any. memory or story or moment you can share.

with us that really sticks with you to. this day when you like think back at. that time of your life? I mean, there's. there there is just a strange thing Mae. Whitman and I have, which is like. it's like we. are speaking some twin language and. there were many, many scenes with her, almost to the degree that I was like, this must stop. We cannot continue. I'd. be have a tiny little maybe tear in my. eye. She'd be like, nope. Nope. Don't do.

it. Don't do it. And like, you know, I. think of like when we're singing playing. guitar and stuff and like, you know, she. improvised a line one day where she said. she said, "You're my hero.". And I'm pretty sure she she she just. like came up with that. And like, it's just a weirdo kind of connection. that, you know, we're having right now. we're we're both about to start crying. If you're listening to this, we both. have tears in our eyes. Oh my I was. wondering like how much.

in Parenthood and in Gilmore Girls are. you kind of improvising certain lines? Gilmore Girls never. Okay. And Parenthood sometimes. And, you. know, but in both just have their merit. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by. BetterHelp. Daddy gang, I know that. therapy can feel like a big investment, but your mental health is so important. to making sure that you live a happy and. fulfilling life. Let's talk numbers. Traditional.

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to get 10% off your first month. That is. better help h e l p dot com slash daddy. In your early career, the press would. criticize you for being single and not. dating. How did those comments back then affect. you? Oh god. I mean. always feels weird to be asked and many. times I was lying because it's such a. strange. um.

thing to talk about, which I still. mainly don't talk about, like something. that. you don't know what's going to happen. I. think some people are built for it. Some. people don't find it personally. uh vulnerable um. and it was also, I have to say, it it. wasn't my focus at the time, so it felt. strange. Like I'm a working person and. I'm. I'm in a career and like. I don't know. This was odd. Would you.

consider yourself a very private person. or would you just consider the career. that you're in. too public? Yeah. Yeah. I think a little bit of. both. I also think I have led in some. ways. you know, an unconventional. like. certain There There is a age at which. most a lot of people do the same thing. There is an age at which a lot of people. get married. There's an age at which a. lot of people have kids. And then there are there are people who.

just are not on that timing and so. I don't know whether to be the. spokesperson for that or like apologetic. about that or like I don't know. No, I. could see that being annoying because. what I. what I appreciate about what I do for a. living is I get to sit down with like. mostly incredible women. I mostly. interview women. And something that I. talked about recently with. I forget who I was just talking about.

this with, which was like timelines. And how we all have something in our. head growing up of like this is my. story. Like I and I was always the. person that was like I'm never getting. married. I'm never getting married. When. I met my now husband, who I just. recently got married to, I literally. said to him, "We will never get. married." And he was like, "Okay, like. chill." And I was like, "It's you can't. change my mind. I just want to be really. up front about that.". changed your mind? I think. because I recognized that when I knew he.

earnestly meant it that he would be with. me for the rest of his life without a. signing a legal document, without me. having a physical ring on my finger, all. of that. And it was months and months of him. never bringing it up. And he would even. he would even say like my partner like. this, that. I saw the level of respect. that he had for what I had initially. wanted. And then I went into therapy and. reevaluated. why was I so.

intent on not wanting to get married. And I would consider myself a very. like strong independent woman who I've. always been career driven. Like I'm. going to go for this until the end and. I'm going to still be working then until. someone rips me out of the chair. And I. was always worried that especially as a. woman it would threaten. a man. And I didn't think I could do. both. And when I started to have a. partner that allowed me to do that, I. was like, "Fuck." I think it's. interesting because I did not have a.

timeline. Okay. And until like the the I I I just didn't. have a timeline. I I think a little bit. growing up the way I did with my mom not. not that mothers give this necessarily. to people, but now I'm like obsessed. with timeline in a in a way that I think. is really positive because. I'm now at an age where I want to be. planning what else I would like in my. life. I I want to be thinking really.

actively about that. I think I was. mainly in relationships where it didn't. really occur to me to say, "This is what. I would like. This is not what I would. not like." I thought that happened just. organically and it doesn't always. And. and like like I love all the matchmaking. shows. Um. hard hard left. Um I and I love them. because. there's like it's you know, we're all. working within a system, right? Like.

we're all learning the way a podcast. works, the way a TV show works, or the. what we want to do next, or how do you. create a show, or all that kind of. stuff. Everything has a system, including being a person on this planet, including being a relationship, including being in a career and juggling. that with like what else you want to do. And I don't know why some fundamental. like. being I don't know it whether it was I. just didn't think that you had to say. those things out loud. And I think like. you're describing the process of the two.

of you kind of. what you did in that in your. relationship is you met over a shared. value. And you didn't have it at first. maybe, or you had a different thought. about it, and then you grew and changed, and I'm sure he did, too. And that's. relationship. And that's the one thing. you cannot predict when you go in is are. we going to grow and change and have. values that keep aligning? And um. and and the only way you have that is by.

talking about it, being open about it, being honest about it, and um. you know, I think it's why again, hard. left, why so many Housewives shows? I love this. I love it. Why you see. these things, do you know, you were you. were watching in sort of real-ish time. or whatever degree we believe it's real, you can see things crumble when people. did people change. People change and you. don't know and you don't know. No, that's such a good point of like when.

people are so perplexed by like, "Well, how did it not work?" And how And it's. like, "Oh, I think it makes complete. sense every time something doesn't. work." Because either one person's not. growing with the other or they're both. growing in complete opposite directions. or they're the exact same and life. happens and you can't stay the same if. you're not like You know what I mean? It's like a pretty sad feeling when. things end, but in my opinion when I. look back at previous relationships I. had, I was never asking the questions. Right. And then this was the first.

relationship I actually was like, "Oh, I. think I'm going to be honest with him. and see if he can handle it." Because. the men I had dated prior to him, I knew. I could never say that because it. wouldn't have worked for the men that I. was dating and I think I'd be curious to. know from you like. I struggled a lot of being a woman with. a career and really loving my career and. being confident in it and I know a lot. of women listening experience this like. men can.

be terrified and emasculated and feel. like, "How can I handle such like a. competent, confident. competent woman?" Like how How is that. impacted you? I just I I tended in the. earlier days to. I dated. maybe. guys who were great, but who weren't as. in their careers and I would feel. apologetic about that more than I don't. know at the So I would maybe.

tamp my thing down a little bit and not. try to. not compete, but like not I want them to. feel bad kind of thing. It is it's. really tricky. Um, but I I will say, you know, like I I. think I was. supportive to one of my sisters when, you know, she was dating her now. husband. I was like, "Ask for this, that, and this." And and it it's like. the TV show thing. If we all knew how to. do it perfectly, every relationship. would be perfect because there's also.

giving something time to grow and. there's also, you know, um, not going in guns blazing like this is. what I want when you haven't established. like a foundation yet, but That's so. relatable what you just said of like. trying to not intimidate. the person you're with and I do feel, and I know this is like not every. statement is just like 100%, but I. bet it's rare that a man is like trying.

to dim his success to make the woman. feel comfortable that she's maybe not as. high up in her career of who they're. together, but you sitting here I've done. it too where like I'm having such. success and the guy that I'm dating I'm. like, "Oh my god, he's going to actually. like. he's not going to be able to You just. feel it. You know their threshold and. you have to dim yourself down and you. don't come home and say, 'Holy [ __ ] I. had the best [ __ ] day at work.'" Cuz. they're like standing there like, "Woah.

woah woah woah woah. Why are you shining. so bright and I'm over here feeling like. a piece of shit?". thing that I wouldn't have thought. Like. I don't feel that way in in like I'm. happy for my friend's success and happy. for my partner's success and and but I. get it. I get it if I get it, especially. in your 20s and 30s and maybe even 40s. when like you're still trying to get to. the thing you wanted to get and it's. hard when, you know, you see somebody. else shoot ahead and and you it's not. that you don't want it for them, you. want it for yourself. And now I just I.

really want to have a good day at work. I'm like not I don't have the whatever. that drive was that I really really that. put me in all those jobs and I didn't. care. I was going to kill kill myself at. work until I could get to an audition. until I could get something like I think. it's age appropriate not to have that as. much anymore. I I got beyond my wildest. dreams. Isn't that incredible that I can say. that? I I I just thought I was going to.

be like in a regional theater company in. Washington DC which still would be a. dream and I got this part that we're. here talking about. Like that is so. moving to me that I just kind of want to. just enjoy my days now, you know, of of. work and now I'm I'm more interested in. the creative vision about. of something or like, you know, I'm. want to direct my friend's book and turn.

it into a movie. Like it's just I want. to be in partnership that is in every. way that is. fun. I think that's an incredible place. to get to because I do think like that. in a lot of people, we all feel it where. you're like everyone's got that thing. individually that you're like if I get. this. I know I work so hard and I deserve it. and I'm going to get it and then once. you get it, then you're like, "Okay, now. what's next?" And it's a beautiful thing. to keep going and but it's also.

it's a lot because then once you get. what you want You got to move the. needle. And do you ever feel like you're. like. when you were in that kind of like race. with yourself, did you ever feel like, "Shit, I need to. not slow down, but did you ever feel. like people were like, "You did it. Like. you accomplished it. Like No, I don't. think anyone gives it gives you that. I. think you have to give it to yourself. Like I remember. I was dating some actor and I was in a.

really busy time. It was maybe like. second, third year of Gilmore Girls. where not only were the days really. busy, but then weekends and doing talk. shows or whatever else was going on at. the time. And I was like, I just don't. I'm tired. I don't want to do it. And. and and his advice was interesting. And we were sort of peers. He was like, "Don't you kind of have to ride this. while it's happening. You can't step off. this train because it's hard to get back. on. Like go do the photo shoot you don't. feel like to go do you know like you.

Now, is that great advice? I don't know, but it it it was. when something's going. uh you that is an opportunity. It will come around again, probably, but. it there is there are times when you're. working harder than you want to. And. then. you but it's like the relationship. thing. You have to keep reevaluating. Does this feel good? I have my friend. Jenny Han has this thing that I always. forget what the third one is. It's.

basically like, am I doing this just for. fun? Am I doing this as maybe an act of. service or for a you know, as a. some somebody I want to help out? Is it. worth it? And that can mean financially, that can mean. it's going to help your career, that can. mean, you know, but you don't have to. just say yes. endlessly, you know. When you're talking. about like reevaluating things, like I. agree and I think that's great advice. for people listening of like you always. have to be like rechecking in with.

yourself. And if you are dating or. you're in a relationship, um. what is something that you've realized. that you're not willing to compromise. on? I mean, so many things. Um it's it it is. First of all, I think in the beginning. something should be easy. It should not. be. I don't know. Are they going to call. like any of that kind of gamesmanship? I think I think I have a great sense of.

how I connect to somebody. physically, intellectually, humor. I. really love a certain level of like. back and forth banter, you know, I love. like I know that and I think the thing I. know now better is also like how are we. going to live this life together? And. it's interesting all my friends my age.

some are still married for a long time, some have been in the dating world. The people who are the happiest are. doing what they want to do and being. really clear up front. Like I you know, I have a friend who's like, "I don't. really think I'm going to get married. again. I you know, I and I. just want to be having fun and out there. and so I just think and that is a gift. of age if you let it be which is. you can just say what you would like and.

there's no amount of. you can't love somebody into. being who you want them to be or you. know, wanting this the same things and I. think. not to put women in a. stereotype, but I I think it it's easy. to be like, "If I just dot dot dot then. he'll dot dot dot.". And I I. don't think that works. It definitely.

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flavor this summer. Tell them your. founding father sent you. Please drink. responsibly hard seltzer with flavors. White Claw Seltzer Works Chicago, Illinois. We need your advice. People listening we can use your wisdom. I'm going to give you a scenario and. you're going to tell me what advice you. would give the person. Okay. Okay. What is your advice for someone who. feels unfulfilled by their job and wants. to make a change but is too nervous to. start over? Well, is there something besides.

starting over that can give you. fulfillment that is. a project. you have that is not dependent on. outside validation. I really as a writer have gotten an. incredible amount of. um satisfaction in just the practice of. of. putting these books together. You get better the more you do.

something, no matter what. No matter. what. Like you don't have to be I just. took up tennis this year. I'm terrible, but I practice and I get better and that. is such a basic thing that really. because of tennis. really became new to to me and and the. writing is that too. I just get better. with doing more and so. job your 9-5 or nobody works 9-5. anymore, but um. your job is one piece of you. Can it can.

it can you give yourself something else. so that you know I mean it's hobbies, it's you know, travel, it's reading, it's whatever else. It's great advice. Um what would you. tell someone who is struggling to. connect with their friends because. they're all in different life phases? I. really get that. It's it they they will. end. Um. I. talk to I've talked about before when I. finished Gilmore Girls and I was like. anybody who's who's up for dinner? No. one? Everybody had children and while I.

was gone like if everybody was in a. different life phase, that's what I. mean. I have often been out of that step. and I think one thing is you have to. meet your friend where they are and like. go over to the house and play with the. toddler and like understand that you you. don't you guys don't have the same. hours, but the. the kids eventually go to college. I thought you were saying the kids. eventually go to sleep. You're like. college. Those [ __ ] are gone now. Well, I have like all my you know, when. I get to go home, my high school. girlfriends are like their kids are gone.

now and like it's it's almost like it's. what one of the many many things I loved. about the Bridget Jones movie and books. Uh this most recent one is like she's. back in the dating scene because, you. know, she she for happy and sad reasons. can be. It's It's always the same. We're. all, you know, it it's like you keep. meeting the same challenges and and in. life. True. Okay, what would you say to. someone who feels like they put all of. their focus on their career and is now. worried that they're falling behind in.

their dating life? I mean, there's really just no fall The. only falling behind is in your mind. You. know, I used to I skipped a grade when I. was little and. and for a long time I was like, I have. an extra year. There's no such thing. Like I was like, I have an extra year. with before I'm the same age as people. who are a year ahead of me. Like it. that's there there is only what you tell. yourself and and, you know, if you've. seen any Nancy Meyers movies, you know. that there's people come around at at. different ages, but it is hard when. you're not with your peer group. But.

Yeah. Can we talk about the essay that. you wrote for Time magazine about aging? And you talk about how you found the. humor in aging as a woman, which I. thought was such a unique, beautiful. take that I loved reading. Um. what inspired you to write a piece like. that? I guess being asked about aging. Like I'm I. I was talking about this today with my. uh.

with some people. You and I are having this experience. We. are having this conversation. We are. different ages. Someday when you are my age and you are. talking to someone who is now your age, you will not feel the difference. as much I think the younger person feels. the difference more than the older. person. I am the same person. I. I think it's psychotic the number of. years. I have lived on this planet. I'm like,

surely that's a miscount. Surely that's. wrong. It doesn't It genuinely does not. feel. that way. As opposed to when I was 30, I. was like, I feel 30. Like I I understood. 40. This now is like. I just don't accept it. And and that. that's funny. And the stuff that cuz. mainly I'm just living the same life. There are some things where you go, oh, I fell and you know, broke a thing and.

like the recovery took a little longer. or whatever. So. but. I am amazed at the people I know who who. are giving into a sense of. um sadness. about getting older or not feeling the. same way they did. I meet that by. not in a brutal way, but like I fight. that. I fight the urge to be like, ugh, I just even don't even like when, you.

know, friends are like, ugh, well, I'm so old. I can't remember that, you know, whatever. Like it's I think it's just. also my mom passed at age 61. Like I'm. not that far away from that. Like I. don't want to be living in um. in. worry. No, I. completely agree with what you're saying. and I had a conversation recently with. um. Ellen Pompeo and she and I were talking. a little bit about how.

women obviously, like we're the ones. that it's like, oh, she's she's getting. older and it's and then you hit 30 AND. IT'S LIKE, OH. RIGHT. AND YOU'RE LIKE, WHAT? Like I've never. felt better. And from what I'm taking. from every woman I keep talking to is, holy [ __ ] 40s are the best. Oh my god. And if you had told me that in 20, I. would have been like, wait, 40s old and. what but it's It's. every person I'm talking to, it feels. like women are just getting better with.

age and it's what society is freaking. women out about of like how you look. because of course that's the only thing. they think that we care about is our. [ __ ] looks. And it's like. how what do you think is the best part. of getting older? I I wrote this in a another essay which. is. um. I. know what I want and I'm grateful for. what I have. That is the best thing about it to me. And and I and the fun you can make it.

fun if you plan what's next. Like as. much as you can you think about so that. it doesn't cuz I think the you know. I. I went to the theater on Sunday here in. Los Angeles which is unusual. And. 90% of the audience. was older. Like way much much older. which you don't see in LA. And I just found it fascinating like.

like. what is that going to be like? I I like. to think about that. I like to plan for. that. I like to imagine what kind of. that's a stylish lady in her perhaps. 70s. Like what do how do I want to. approach that so that I'm not scared by. it. I'm not freaked out by it. I'm not. depressed because it truly is all the. things people say of like you should be. so lucky to be in all those places and. yeah and the how you look thing is like. I don't know.

It's so tired. Yeah. Like it's. How do you think men and women handle. aging differently? I've actually heard from. I think it's a vulnerable thing for guys. too and there is like. popular opinion would say they have it. easier but I I it's it's if you. identified as a beauty of either man or. woman as as a younger person, I think. it's.

the loss might be greater. Like my mom. was. a stunningly beautiful. person who literally turned heads on the. street. I did not grow up with that. I'm. not saying. whatever I I just didn't have that. identity. That was not my thing. So it's. not still still not my thing. Like it's. not I don't feel the loss of like that. being treated that way and even in. relationship, I never like met someone. across a crowded room. I was friends.

with them or I worked with them or I it. was organic. Like it was just I you. know, would fall for the person and they. would fall for me and so. I think that makes it a little bit. easier. Yeah. Why I wanted to bring this. whole conversation though up about aging. and the different generations is. obviously because of your new show. I. think there's this like huge. conversation obviously about like Gen Z. and it's like an interesting. it's interesting. Like even just like us. talking about you even saying like we're. different age. Like you take on the Z.

suite. Like what drew you to this role? Cuz this is different. I'm so it's. different. That's the That was one of. the main things. I like I liked that. this First of all, it's a comedy. I. really This is how I would like to. spend my days now. I feel that I cannot. touch the beauty that is Glimmer Girls. I really love that dramedy fam. parenthood space. I did start in half. hour and it was so fun to just do.

something that was a little more. big and. and. look at. female bosses because it's a trope of a. kind and like that was there, but I was. also like, this is so relatable to a. anybody when the thing you have worked. for. is taken away, whether it was your fault. or somebody else is coming up behind you. or like,

you know, or somebody's better at it. That is just. evolution. That's just being a human on. this planet. Like, nothing lasts forever and and so. and then I love the showrunner. You. know, now again, like I said, it's. putting all the pieces together. I'm not. just responding to the part. I'm. responding to what's this experience. going to be? Do I get to have a say in. creative conversation and like, and also. that it was you know, we're the first. scripted programming for to be uh.

original scripted programming and I was. like, that's fun and I just want to say, probably the kids know, but people still. say to me, oh, I can't have another. subscription. It's free. You just. download it. You um, you know, put your. email in if you want to save stuff, but. it's so easy the interface and it's and. it's it's very um, it doesn't cost you anything. Um, I love. that you're talking also about the. character of like, being good at. something, but then questioning if.

you're good at it because if you're. getting replaced or what's happened. like, that's like. again, a conversation that one, I love. the point of a woman being at the top. because we still don't see that that. often still. How crazy. And two though, like being pushed out in a moment where. you're probably also feeling like you're. at your best. Like, right when I feel. like you're starting to hit your stride. is when they want to then replace the. women with a younger woman, which is. such a crazy [ __ ] concept because. you're like, we know I.

I just had to get Wait, how am I already. not in the conversation anymore? Endlessly and it's not just. women, it's we are we are not to be real. um, esoteric. We we will replaced. You and I. will not be here forever. Bye. And that is that's how it goes. And so, that's true in work, in life. Yeah, I. remember I did a pilot that didn't get. picked up. And one of the younger cast.

was like she was like, "So, is this. going to get picked up?" And I was like, "Oh, I have no idea, you know." And. she's like, "What do you mean? They. don't tell you?" And I'm like, "No. They. don't know. Nobody knows. Nobody tells. me." And she's like, "So, she you could. see her like thing." She was like, "So, this just keeps happening over and over. where like you do something and then you. see if it goes you know, you don't know. how that's going to turn out." And I was. like, "Yeah." Like you don't you don't. get to a place where it's just a slam. dunk in in life, in, you know, relationship, in work. What do you hope people take away from.

the show? Honestly, I just hope they. have a good time. I mean, I've seen it. it is truly makes fun of everybody. No. one is woke or. doing a great job. That's to me a fun. comedy if everyone's silly. And I think. there's something there that we haven't, you know, that. that does sort of that is in the. zeitgeist of like, do kids know, not. kids, but I call them the kids on the on. the show. I'm sure they're so. irritating. Um I'm like, "Where are the. kids? Are the kids coming to lunch?" Um.

they're all like, you know, 29 years. old. Um. but so. you know, there there's something there. because. it we're living in. various kinds of times, but on the one. hand, a really expressive time where, you know, people can bring themselves to. uh work, at least they do here. And like. I this character does not understand. what language they're speaking. And I. just think that's relatable. Now, Lauren, thank you so much for.

coming on. This was a pleasure sitting. down with you. You're so incredible. You. your life is so inspiring and everything. you've done and I feel like whenever I. get to sit down with someone that I have. admired and been inspired by and I get. to watch and then I get to like get to. know them as like a real human being. It. is why I do my job. Like this is so fun. for me and I just thank you for taking. the time cuz I know you're a busy woman. Thank you and I loved this conversation. and I I just loved being asked these.

questions and and being included in in. this whatever this journey is going to. be for you. So congratulations and thank. you for inviting me.