Jane Fonda: The GOAT (Full Episode)

What is up, Daddy Gang? It is your. founding father, Alex Cooper, with Call. Her Daddy. Jane Fonda, welcome to Call Her Daddy. >> Thank you very much. I'm happy to be. here. >> I'm so happy that you're here. Daddy. Gang, Jane is a two-time Academy. Award-winning actress, and her. meaningful work in activism has spanned. decades. Jane, I am. completely honored to be sitting across.

from you today. >> Thank you very much. >> Truly. Truly. I need you to know. that Grace and Frankie has been my. comfort show for the past few years. I'm obsessed. It's charming. It's. hilarious. And you are good friends with. your co-star, Lily Tomlin. You guys have. been friends for almost 40-some years. >> Yes. >> Can you give some advice on how to. maintain friendships, even if someone is.

going through, let's say, a situation. that's very different from their friend, and they're not completely on the same. page? Like, how are we maintaining. friendships? >> That's a good question, especially as. you get older and your life gets busy. and everything. If you want to maintain a friendship, you have to be intentional. You really. have to work at it. You know, for. example, last night I I I had dinner. with a young Canadian film director, TV. director. She directed a couple of Grace. and Frankie episodes. And when she.

finished her last episode on Grace and. Frankie, we said, "Let's. maintain our friendship. Let's work at. it. Let's be intentional.". >> Yeah, I agree with that. I do think. there's something about It's hard. sometimes if one person's putting in. more work than the other. And maybe I. think sometimes we get confused if that. means it's a for lack of trying on the. other person's side. But I don't know if. you've had this experience, but. sometimes it really just means that. person's going through something and.

sometimes it has to be uneven. Sometimes. one person's going to put in a little. bit more work, sometimes the other. friend's going to put in more work. >> Yeah. Well, that's that's the case with. my friendship with Sally Field. Sally. you wouldn't know this in real life, but. she tends to be a bit reclusive. She's. not one to really want to go out a lot. So, um you know, especially when I lived. in Atlanta, I would have to really coax. her out to come to dinner with me or get.

together or or whatever. It you know, it. But see, I understand her. I know that's how she is. I don't take. it personally, but I I go after her. I. >> I love it. >> Yeah. >> I think that's a great lesson, too, of. like there's different personalities in. friendships and if you can be the one. that's going at your friend more and you. know their personality, you're not. taking it to heart of like they don't. want to hang out with me. Hopefully. they'd let you know if they don't want. to hang out with you. But sometimes you.

just have to go with personality and. lean in. So, you're the one that's going. after your friends. I love that. Call. Her Daddy is brought to you by Credit. Karma powered by TurboTax. I remember. when I got my first job and I had. absolutely no idea how to file my taxes. I actually didn't even really understand. what taxes were. In hindsight now that I. think about it. Anyways, um do you guys. remember those traumatic days in middle. school where your dad would try to help. you with your math homework and you'd be. sitting there crying at the kitchen. table. Um I think that's like a really.

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how to make every dollar go further. Daddy gang, I know how confusing and. stressful money can be. It is like. somehow we're just made to feel like, "Oh, if you don't get it, then you don't. get it." And it's like, "No, no, no.". Having a clearer, more complete picture. of your money with Credit Karma goes. such a long way in making things feel. more manageable so that you can hit your. goals, right? Start your taxes now in. Credit Karma. You got this, daddy gang. What was the hardest challenge that you. personally faced that a friendship.

helped you through? >> You know, I'm I'm hesitating because. most of the hardships that I've gone. through in my life happened earlier in. my life. And earlier in my life, I never reached. out for help. I considered it a big weakness. I wanted. to be like a guy, you know, I just I. don't need I don't need anybody kind of. thing. But I remember I had my first hip. replacement surgery. I was living in. Atlanta. And it didn't go well, and I.

was in real pain and kind of hazy from. anesthetics and stuff like that. And I. felt somebody at my feet. It felt really good. And I looked down. in my darkened bedroom, and it was Eve. Ensler, the playwright Vagina. Monologues, who's my friend and who had. flown down from New York to massage my. feet and make me feel better. I said, "Why are you here?".

And she said, "Because I love you.". You know, we have to do that for our. friends, but she's, you know, she's. really extraordinary, a very. generous, giving person, and and I was. just beginning to learn to. to accept help and and comfort. >> I appreciate you sharing that. I think. that's very relatable. Sometimes, I. think especially being women, there's. been a narrative that we're emotional. and we can't handle it. So, sometimes. you try to combat that with coming off. as strong. When really the way that we.

survive is through human connection. And. so, I'm wondering if there was ever a. turning point that you remember being. like, "I'm not ashamed now to ask for. help." Or did that just come through. life experience? >> It was a gradual process. I'm 85 now, and I would say that it began to happen. um. in my 40s. You see, earlier in my life, and I'm talking 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, the mark of maturity was.

independence. I don't need anybody. I'm. I'm grown up now. Um there was no recognition of. interdependence. And of course, that was. especially true for men. So, if you were. a. a woman who identified with men, "I don't want to be like a woman. I want. to be strong. I want to be a winner, you. know, like my dad." Um. that that became my motto to I'm going. to grow up and be an independent and I.

don't need anybody kind of a person. Um. and that was part of the culture, but. that began to change. So, so my change. also corresponded to a broader. societal um. change which I'm afraid is kind of going. back to the way it used to be, rugged. individualism, you know, I'm only going. to think about me and my family. And. this is a time, if ever there was one, where we have to understand we have to.

work together. and that we are interdependent. >> Yeah, I agree with you. I think it's. interesting. I feel like we kind of saw. that with the recent overturn of Roe v. Wade and then everything that happened. um with the elections, I felt as though. we were all we've all recently been made. to feel like. we have no choice, this is how it is, but if we all gather together as a. collective, go vote, and then look what. can happen. So, it is kind of like a. mind game that the systems play with us,

but if we unite, there's nothing. stronger. >> That's right. >> You know, you I mentioned you have two. Academy Awards, but in reading your. bios, it's so fascinating because the. word activist often precedes the word. actor. And I'm curious, when and why did. you begin speaking out about causes that. you believe in? >> I was not a an activist at all. until I met soldiers who'd been fighting. in Vietnam who opened my eyes to what.

the Vietnam War really was. And. I was just I was. I was horrified. I couldn't believe it. I really grew up believing, boy, if our. flag is flying, if our troops are. fighting, we're on the side of the. angels. And so, when I. heard from soldiers. what was really happening, I. I just felt so betrayed and.

everything in my life changed. I worked. with active duty soldiers and sailors. and Marines. >> Which is so admirable because I no. matter obviously you're well known, right? And you were a famous actress at. the time, but in order to speak on. something that everyone loves to put. women in boxes. Like I know you're the. pretty actress stay over there. Like how. did you find it within yourself to speak. out on something that could be. considered controversial? >> I didn't even think about that. I I I.

just. what I heard and they gave me a book to. read that. just absolutely transformed me and it. you know. it was my heart. that was opened up um and. everything I believed was shattered and. so I had to look for new realities. I. wasn't even thinking about it's. controversial it could affect my career. I don't All I knew was this is really. wrong and there are a lot of people in.

in my country that are standing up and. trying to do something about it. I want. to be with them. I don't want anymore to be a hedonistic. uninvolved. and I was not happy. You know, I was it was like why am I. here? People need to understand why. they're on earth. Why are why am I. alive? What am I supposed to do with. this wonderful fragile life I have? And and. so it was a great turning for me. I went.

from not very happy meaningless aimless. woman to somebody who knew why I was on. earth and what I was going to do. >> I really I mean I have such respect for. you and I obviously not that what I was. trying to do is comparable, but I have. started this show and I was talking. about sex and relationships and I was. kind of telling you before like it was. really an attempt to have a conversation. that historically men have been able to. have. There's no repercussions when they.

talk about sex and relationships. If. anything, it's glamorized. But when a. woman has the same exact conversation, there's name-calling and there's. judgment. And so, when Roe v. Wade was. overturned, I ended up doing a. docu-series for my podcast where I flew. to Charlotte, North Carolina and I met. with these women that were running a. Preferred Women's Health Center and was. helping women get abortions. And. watching firsthand all the women coming.

from the South because the abortion. desert, that was like the first location. they could go to. I was really nervous. to put out the episode, honestly, because I had never gotten my toes in. the political water, which to me I was. like, this isn't I mean, it is. political, but it's also just human. rights. And I was really nervous, but I. feel like people like you have allowed. someone like me to feel like, you know. what? I have to take a chance with my. career that may backfire. But then, what am I doing this for? I've.

so many young women listening. Um and I. just felt like you're you're such a. great example. I just am I have chills. just being in the same room with you. because you have carved such a path for. someone like me to be able to sit here. and to take a chance like that. >> You know, thank you very much. >> The thing that was unusual or is unusual. about my activism is that I didn't just. give money. I I was on the ground. Wher- whether it was with.

outside military bases with soldiers, on. reservations with tribes, indigenous. tribes. I was there on the ground. My celebrity would sometimes. it would create a distance between me. and the people that I was working with. For example, the first time I was ever. arrested, I was marching with um. tribes up in in in the Seattle region of. Washington state who were. uh.

claiming. Fort Lawton as a cultural center, an. indigenous cultural center. And we. climbed over a wall and went onto the. fort and we were all arrested. They were. beaten. I wasn't. Um there was a young woman who had her. young child in her arms and she said, "Well, you you have a young daughter. Where's your daughter?". My daughter was at home with a. governess. It it made me more and more. uncomfortable, my celebrity and my.

privilege separating me from the people. I wanted to work with. And I had a. friend in Detroit. He was the founder of. of an organization called. Revolutionary Black Lawyers. His name was Ken Cockrel and I said, "Ken, I think I'm going to quit being an. actor and become a full-time organizer.". And he said, "Fonda, don't you dare.". He said, "The movement has. many organizers. We don't have movie. stars. The movement needs you.

Not only should you not quit, take your. career seriously. Be more intentional. about what you do. Make your movies. reflect your values. Stick stick with. that.". So, I did. I began to, you know, I made. Coming Produce Coming Home and Nine to. Five and a number of of films. >> It's interesting to hear you grappling. with the dichotomy of Jane Fonda, the. movie star, and Jane Fonda, the person. that wants to be on the ground helping. people. And I think that.

what you just said is actually relatable. in a different way for people of like, use whatever privilege you have. and maximize on that rather than trying. to pretend it's not there or wanting it. to not be there, use it. Because you're. right, people are going to listen to. you. It's really admirable how you were. able to pivot your mindset of like I can. do it. >> You're like it wasn't my idea. I was going to ask like before your work. in activism, what was a belief you held.

that you eventually learned. went against feminism? >> Oh, to. to do whatever will please the man that. I'm with. Even if it's to spite my own well-being. Um. I would fall in love. What's wrong with. that sentence? Fall.

No, to have a good relationship, an. authentic relationship, both people have. to be standing on their feet and meet as. full human beings. Um but it you know, it took me into my. 60s to know that. >> You were often cast as the girl next. door. I'm interested to know like did. you. feel like the girl next door? Like how. did that role affect how you viewed. yourself?

>> I was miserable. I didn't enjoy it. I. kept wanting to quit. Um I never felt like the girl next door, but I know that I kind of looked like. the girl next door. But also, I was. suffering with an eating disorder and. you know, I mentioned that because you. mentioned that you have young women are. your audience. So, you know, this. continues to be a problem with young. women. I was I was bulimic anorexic and. so. you know, to suddenly I'm becoming a.

starlet. and there's so much emphasis on how you. look. and it was a trigger, constant constant. trigger. for me. >> Yeah, there's already such an. objectification on women everywhere. about their looks, but for your job to. be specifically predicated on your. looks, it's a recipe for disaster, especially for your mental health, which. back then mental health wasn't even a. word that people used, right? Um, you. grew up in Los Angeles and your father.

was a famous actor. How did your father. and your relationship with him affect. who you are now? >> Well, I've overcome the effects that it. had on me. I've worked most of my life to overcome. the judgmental the the objectification. and and judgmentalism and the. unconsciously making me feel that I'm. not lovable, you know, if I'm not really thin, things. like that. It was a generational problem.

for a lot of men my father's age. Um, the objectification of women and. um, took me a long time to get over that. >> Yeah. Yeah, I would say so having it from your. father, that must have been difficult to. feel objectified when really all you. want is love and support. >> Right. >> Do you think that your relationship with. your father influenced your then. romantic relationships? >> Oh, sure. Um,

I was determined that I was going to. marry somebody that was the opposite of. my father. I married three times. On the surface, they all looked the. opposite of my father. But where it mattered, the ability to. to become intimate, really. In- What. does that mean, intimate? It means. this is who I really am authentically. Warts and all. I'm going to be authentic with you. Um,

and I think that I chose men who weren't. that way and weren't going to demand. that of me. And I think that's because. of my father, you know, and. my relationship with him. >> Yeah. Do you see. if you look back, do you see like. patterns in your romantic relationships? >> I mean, I stayed in them all longer than. I should have. >> Relatable. >> Uh-huh. >> That's very. >> You know, didn't have the guts to.

Uh yeah, also not really talking things. out. enough, you know. If you have issues on the on on the. level of relationships, they're going to. keep playing themselves out. >> Yeah. Isn't that so interesting? I feel. like I I mean, I I know I have more to. go, but like the relationships I've had. in my past, I feel like because I wasn't. fully formed as an individual and knew. what I really wanted, I was looking for.

it in men. And the pattern kept arising. that the relationships were pretty. toxic. That I eventually worked on. myself and then I'm now in one that's. not unhealthy, but it took me like. taking responsibility for myself to be. like, I got to wake up at some point or. it's just going to keep happening. Like. we don't need to say the definition of. insanity, Jane, but like you know what I. mean? Like you you all of a sudden you. got to wake up one day and be like, "Huh, if this keeps happening, I have to.

>> Look at yourself. How old are you? >> I'm 28. >> Holy mother. God, you're a genius. >> What? >> 28, I wasn't even thinking about these. things. Oh my lord. You're you're so. much more evolved than me. >> I I wish. >> I didn't start to get it till I was in. my 60s. And even then, I mean, talk. about stumbling and falling on your. face. >> But I But don't you feel like, which I'm. grateful for, is.

it's because of the generation after. generation, we all learn and we pick off. of what we want to take from. >> if you're resilient, >> True. you're that that, you know, you. are then a resilient person. Um you you can you can pick up on what's. going on, and you can. you can metabolize that, and not. everybody can do that. >> But even like you like it don't you feel. like it would be impossible for you to. be where I'm at right now because you. had your father had different values. Like all like my parents had parents.

that had such a different generation and. view, and so it's like the trickle-down. effect of it gets a little better each. time where your generation pushed. against your parents' generation. And. now I'm pushing against my parents'. generation. So we're all kind of helping. each other. It's taking a little bit. longer than we want, but like it's it's. happening. It's happening. >> Well, you're like a supercharged. My god. You're going to You're going to. be president or something. >> I'm going to start crying because coming. from you, I just stopped. >> 28, I mean, you look It's not that you.

look older, but you're so evolved for 20. [ __ ] eight. >> you. Oh my god. I did Listen, I think a lot of my. listeners, yeah, I said are in their. 20s. What advice would you give them. in trying to figure out what they. believe in and what causes they care. about. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> It's hard. >> Well, you know, one thing that I I I. always want to say to young people, it. is so hard to be young. Don't let. anybody fool you.

It it gets easier when you get older, believe it or not. I mean, assuming a. modicum of good health, but it's really. young. It's really hard to be young. It's It's like who What am I supposed to. do? Who am I supposed to know? What am I. supposed to become? What am I supposed. to be interested in? All these huge. questions that will determine the whole. rest of your life. As you get older, it's like. I know what I need. I know what I can. let go of. I've been there before, it.

didn't kill me. I'm going to survive. that. You know, it's you know, you you. don't make mountains out of molehills. and. it's just it's just easier. Um so. Well, I mean, it seems to me that young. people should care about. is there going to be a future that is. going to be livable? Or are we going to go to you know, from. one. climate extreme that is life-threatening. even to people who are wealthy and.

privileged, although it's going to hit. the unprivileged and not white people. worse. Um. it's your future that's at stake. There. is a climate crisis and and the window. to do something about it is closing. We. don't have We have. don't have a lot of time. But. there's ample reason to remain hopeful. The scientists who all agree. that there's a crisis and that it's. caused by fossil fuels and that people.

have to act. They're unanimous. Uh and they're telling us time is. running out, but you still have time to. to reverse this and do something about. it. So. the first I would advise young people. just to find out about the climate. crisis and then. I'm sure that you want to do something. about it. And that means not. individually, you know, you I mean, it's. good to do individual things because it. makes you feel good and it makes you. feel like that you're not a hypocrite,

but it's we have to change systems. We have to change who we elect to to. government. We have people in the. government that are Democrats as well as. Republicans who take money from the. fossil fuel industry and vote against. bills that can save your lives in the. future. So we have to get rid of those. people most and they're not all guys, but they're mostly guys and they're. mostly white. Yeah, so we have to pay attention to who. we vote for. We have to vote.

But become familiar with the climate. crisis and. join with others in some organization. to do something about it in your town, in your city, in your school, in your. university. On there's all different levels that you. can that you can work on and I think. that it's it feels good and the the. young people that I've met doing this. kind of work are so wonderful. You'll. make new friends.

>> I appreciate you sharing so much about, you know, you like being like, "Oh, in. my 60s I figured it out." Like when. people look at Jane Fonda. it's like this is who I want to be. Like. I aspire to have such intellect and. grace and drive. >> Well, man, I have worked at it. for 50 years. >> And I think that's why I like really. respect you being open about that. because I'm interested to know like. young women in their 20s right now that. are listening. What is the biggest lesson you learned.

in your 20s and how did you learn it? >> Oh, in my 20s I was starting to be a. movie actor. I I suffered from bulimia very, very. bad. I um. I leave I led a secret life. I was very, very unhappy. I assumed I wouldn't live past 30. I'm. 85. I don't understand. Well, I do. I I worked hard. I uh.

I didn't go out. I didn't hardly date. I. hardly cuz I was I was unhappy and I had. this eating disorder. And um and then I. was also making movies. that I didn't very much like. And then. the Vietnam War got me. >> Mhm. >> and changed my life. >> When you say you were living a secret. life, are you talking about the eating. disorder? >> Yes. >> Mhm. >> Yes. >> Do you mind just sharing a little bit of. insight of anything you have for I know.

so many women write in to me that. struggle with an eating disorder and how. you personally overcame that? >> of all, you've got to understand it. seems so innocent in the beginning, so. innocuous. Why can't I have this ice. cream and cake and then I'll I'll just. throw it up. What you don't realize is it becomes a. terrible addiction. that takes over your life. And.

it it harms the way you look. You end up looking tired. It becomes impossible to have an. authentic relationship. when you're doing this secretly. Um your day becomes organized around. getting food. and and then eating it. Um. which requires that you're by yourself. and that no one knows what you're doing. Um it's a very lonely thing and and. you're and you're addicted. I mean, you.

can't. if you put any food in you, you you want. to get rid of it and and. it happens when your life is. inauthentic, when. what you should be doing and who you. should be or who you really are, those. things are being betrayed. You know, in a. maybe a false relationship where where. you're faking it. You you know, you know that it's wrong, but you keep going. That kind of thing.

Inauthenticity can can can cause it. Um. also being told that you're fat. And and um it can start with that. But then it takes over your life and. so as I got older, you know, you can. you can think you can get away with it. when you're young because your body is. so young. As you get older, the toll that it takes on you it becomes. worse and worse. It takes days.

and then at least a week to get over one. single binge. And it's not just the fatigue, it's you. become angry, you become hostile. All the trouble that I got in was. because of that anger and that. hostility. And then it got to a point in my 40s. when I just thought, "I'm either. if if I keep on like this, I'm going to. die.". I certainly will not I was liv- living a. very full life. I had children, I had a.

husband, I I'd had two husbands by then. I was doing political work, I was doing. all these things. And my life was important. But I was becoming less and less able to. continue it. So, I went cold tur- I didn't realize that. there were groups that you could join. I. didn't know anything about that yet. And nobody talked about it. I didn't. even know there was a word for it. And. so, I just went cold turkey and. and it was really hard.

But the fact is that the more distance. you can put between. you and the last binge, then the better it is. It becomes easier. and easier. Now, they say you can never. get cured. That's not true. But I But I. did need Prozac. That was my. the drug that helped me cuz a lot of the. cause of it was anxiety driven. And Prozac helped me deal with anxiety. And so, and then gradually, I just. stopped doing it.

>> Thank you for sharing that because I'm. interested to know like. the effects that social media every. generation has, right? Like the way that. women were objectified. In the '90s, it's the glossy magazines, then the. tabloids, now social media, it's it's. like we're exacerbating it again almost. Like when you see what's the impact for. young women with what's happening on. social media, how does that make you. feel? >> I'm scared for them. It's much much. worse. There was no social media when I. was.

um. younger. Uh I think it makes it much worse and. it's really hard and I don't know what. the cure is. It's bigger than I can. >> If someone's going to fix it, it could. be Jane Fonda though. Um I I'm curious, what advice can you give to women. around distancing themselves from the. pressures to look, feel, and act a certain way because.

we have a vagina. I. >> I think um the old consciousness-raising. group. is is good. I think we can't do it by. ourselves as individuals. I think getting together. with other young people. our I don't you know, whoever is. listening, whatever age you are, you may. not be young, but with other females.

to talk about it. And when you recognize the shared. challenge that you're all facing, it helps to say, "Well, [ __ ] this. I'm. not going to do this anymore.". And then you start to become a feminist. But I yeah, I think group talking about. it is is is good. Knowing that you're. not alone. and that um.

that you can work up courage by dealing. with it together as a group. I'm going. to teach you a little history. In the 1970s, a huge change happened to psychology, to. psychologists and therapists. The. thinking in psychology was that. what Freud said was. incest. against women. is maybe one in a million. It's It's a.

fantasy that women have for various. reasons, but it's one in a million. Freud, one in a million, and that was. the thinking coming into the '70s. So, these feminist therapists began to. meet regularly in various places in New. England. And they began to talk about the. experiences that they were having with. their clients. And one would say One said, "You know, I. She was incestuous." And another would.

say, "I have a client that was incestuous.". And they started to discover. that this was. This was not one in a mill- This was. like epidemic. What is going on here? They began to. reach out to other. therapists around the country who began. to meet, and they all found out They. discovered that this is extremely. common. And.

the kind of therapy that they developed. was very different than Freud, where you lie on your back and look at. the ceiling while the the Freudian. therapist sits behind you. These women. created relational therapy. And it's like It's the difference. between men's friendship and women's. friendship. Men sit side by side. Women. sit facing each other and relate. emotionally. So, therapists would be. able to look into their clients' eyes,

would cry with them, would show empathy. and emotion with them. And the women. began to heal. They discovered that it's. what happens when you're abused, especially incest, is your ability to. trust and relate is just is ruptured. And recreating trust and the ability to. relate through relational therapy could. could help heal these women. And so. again, it's an the reason I told that.

story was because it's such a great. When you get together in groups, you. learn new things. And it changes. everything. >> You're in a new movie, 80 for Brady. The movie is centered around a friend. group of four women. >> Yeah. >> What similarities did the women in the. movie have to your real-life friend. group? >> Well, two of them are my real-life friend. group, Sally and Lily. I mean, Sally and.

I identify with each other quite a lot. And we talk a lot. We we get down and we. talk about these kinds of things. And and I've always identified with her. I you know, we're quite. in many ways very close. Lily is a. completely different person from me, and. I'm fascinated by her, absolutely. fascinated. We'll be sitting side by side and. someone will come up and say something. serious, and Lily will find a way to respond that. is a laugh.

I I mean, she's just. I'm I can't do that. I'm just in awe of. it. >> Is it fun to work with your friend? >> Uh yeah, very much. >> Right. That's why you keep doing it. >> I mean, you guys are. >> We've made two movies since we stopped. Grace and Frankie. >> It's like you guys can't get away from. each other, but let me be clear, we. don't want you guys to get away from. each other cuz you're magnetic on. screen. It's amazing. >> Thank you. >> What is the most rewarding benefit of. having a strong group of girlfriends.

>> Your health. You know, there was a study done by. Harvard Medical School that said that. not having women friends is as bad for. your health as smoking. And. you know, men sit side by side looking. outward at cars, at women. Oh, wow, look at that one. Sports. Women look into each others eyes.

And they ask for help. They show their vulnerability. That's so important. That's important for health. It's I. think it's one reason why women on. average live 5 years, 7 years longer. than men do. Also, when women laugh I. don't know about you, but when I'm with. my women friends and we laugh, I mean, you got to cross your legs. Yeah. It's. It's It comes from the belly. I don't. laugh like that with men. And And I know.

that there are men that I could But I. I've I've not They're They haven't come. my way. >> There's a lot of women that always write. in to me asking, you know, like, I'm in. a new relationship and I have a. boyfriend and I feel like I'm distancing. myself from my girlfriends. And I love. you comparing it to it's about it's as. bad as smoking if you don't have your. girlfriends around you because it is a. different dynamic. >> It's a real problem to to but it's one. that I've been guilty of. >> Yeah. >> When you fall in love and everything is. so intense. that you you don't have time for your.

girlfriends anymore. But what that does, especially if if. it's a relationship that's ongoing, is it accustoms. the guy, if you're. heterosexual, the guy to you not taking. time to be with girlfriends. And like if this relationship lasts and. you end up getting married or staying. together, you're going to want your. girlfriends. But you can't and then to. go and then you have to re-educate.

your partner to accept the presence of. girlfriends. So, you know, make it make it a part of. your life even in the beginning. >> Your character. ends up trying to ghost her love. interest. And I'm curious to know, Jane, in real life, have you ever been ghosted. or are you usually the one doing the. ghosting, not answering someone, being. like, "I'm going to ignore them and.

disappear from their life?". >> Well, I've mostly been married. three times. um or had steady boyfriends in between. up until a certain later point in my. life. I, you know, I thought that if I. wasn't with an alpha male that I. nobody would be interested in me. Um. so I married, I didn't ghost. >> That's so iconic. I married, I didn't.

ghost. >> And I don't know if anybody's ghosted. me. I'm sure they have, but I can't I. don't know if they have. >> I feel like no one has ever ghosted you. And now hopefully, if a guy wasn't. treating you right, you're going to. ghost them. You're not going to marry. them, right, Jane? >> Honey, there's not going to be if a guy. I, you know, I live in a new house, well, I've been there for 7 years and. when I moved in, like a lot of. California houses, there was a man's.

bathroom and a women's bathroom. I said, "No, no, no, no, no, no, no. There will. never be a man living in this house. ever." So, they took both bathrooms for. me. >> Damn right. >> No, I've The three's enough. My father. was married five times. I don't want to. go that way. >> Right. >> yeah. >> You're going to keep it at three. >> Yeah. >> One last question. What was it like. meeting Tom Brady? I'm assuming you met. him. >> My knees got started to give away. I'm. not kidding. He came into my trailer. Holy [ __ ] And my knees started to.

buckle. I was standing next to the sink, so I held on. But no, and that's when he signed this. jersey that I'm wearing and gave it to. me. He gave it to everybody, but anyway. Um. No, it's you know, it's twofold. He's a. goat. He's the greatest of all time. When somebody is that good at what they. do, he's like magic. You you have to bow down. But then on top of it, he's so gorgeous, you know? And so.

I was just overwhelmed and he was so. sweet, very generous, very nice. >> You know, I view you as the goat, Jane. Okay, so I truly cannot thank you enough. for sitting down with me. I know you're. a very busy woman. >> You are a fantastic interviewer. I mean, I've been at this for 60 years. You're. one of the best interviewers I've ever. had. You're really wonderful. >> I'm going to faint. Um I have to go. Jane, no, thank you so much. I'm going. to start crying. >> You're also beautiful. I mean, I don't.

know Does this go Is this Is this. podcast visual or audio? >> Visual. >> So people know what you look like. >> And people know what you look like. >> want your audience to, you know, cuz. sometimes they're you know, they're only. video audio. >> Right, so you want to give a disclaimer. >> you want to say to the au- I want you to. know, audience, she's gorgeous. >> Jane, it was an absolute honor, pleasure. You are incredible and I I. can't thank you enough for coming on. Thank you. >> Thanks for having me.