Becky G: Cheating & People Pleasing

What is up, Daddy Gang? It is your. founding father, Alex Cooper, with Call. Her Daddy. Becky G, welcome to Call Her Daddy. >> Do I call you Daddy or Alex? >> You can call me whatever you want. >> I'll call you papi. Ooh. >> Okay. >> I'm just kidding. >> I will not I will not get [laughter]. upset about that. Um I have been so. excited to talk to you. I feel like you. have had just such an incredible massive.

career. I know you started at 9 years. old. Now your music has streamed over 20. billion times. You've sold out tours. You've received five Latin Grammy. nominations. You've been in this. industry for almost two decades, but I. do still feel like there is so much to. discover about you and so much of your. story that hasn't fully been told. So. I've been really looking forward to sit. down with you. >> Same. Thank you so much for having me. >> I heard that on your rider.

you always have tequila and your. pre-show ritual is to take a tequila. shot before. So I figured if you're. down, I poured us two tequila shots. >> Girl. >> No. >> I love this. This is going to be my. favorite podcast I've ever done ever. >> it's 1:00 p.m. I want to do a little cheers. >> somewhere. >> What should we toast to? >> I think we should toast to. um. being big daddies in our fields. Um I.

think we should toast to. the fact that I'm sitting in this couch. cuz I've seen so many people that I love. and admire sit right here across from. you. And I just feel so, yeah, excited. for this conversation. So toast to you. >> Cheers. >> Cheers. We'll do the arriba. >> Arriba. >> Abajo. >> Abajo. >> Al centro. >> Al centro. >> Adentro. >> Adentro. Oh [ __ ] this looks big. >> These are really cute glasses. >> Okay. >> You took that down nice, girl.

>> Well, I'm trying. Well, I would have. >> a tequila drinker? >> I am, but I'm more reposado. Also, I was. looking in your eyes and I'm like, why. is she not flinching? So, I'm trying. [laughter] not to flinch, but I'm like. >> I I think you wore it nicely. >> Okay, okay. Yeah, we did that right. We. did that right. >> Um how did that become a tradition for. you with your shows that you do that. before every show? >> I'm Mexican. It just felt right. >> Yeah, it just felt right. I know that. sounds really funny, but I just feel. like that's like our. It's like a celebratory thing. It's also. like a warm-up thing. I'm sure you've. heard singers talk about like hot.

toddies and stuff like that. >> yeah. >> That's just like I just want a tequila. straight. >> Is that your go-to drink? >> It really is. >> Just tequila straight? >> Just tequila on the rocks, or it could. be it could be warm. It could be mixed. It could be any tequila. >> I will just have tequila on the rocks. and I'm happy. Happy. Um [ __ ] marry, kill tequila, vodka, gin. >> Oh, just [ __ ] marry tequila. Everything. else can die. >> You don't drink anything else? >> You know, I do. I like wine. I'm just.

not like an alcoholic. Oh my god. >> You're fine. [laughter]. >> Let me watch myself. Um no, I love wines. Um so, is it You. know what's funny? I feel like wines and. food are great pairings for me. I'm also like a champagne girly every. now and then. I love a little a little. bubbles. Um. >> But it's tequila. >> But tequila's just my [ __ ] I'll have a. beer every now and then. A little chill on the side. Yeah. >> But tequila, okay. Okay, we're going to. kick it off with a game. >> Oh, let's go. >> I'm going to ask you some of your firsts.

and your worsts. >> Oof. >> Are you ready? >> Yes. >> Okay. What is the first thing you do. every morning when you wake up? >> First thing I do every morning when I. wake up. >> [gasps]. >> I don't know. Try to get it together, girl. Yeah. Uh it depends on the season. If I'm in like recovery season, it's. like meditation. I make my morning coffee at home. Um if it's a busy season, I'm probably. panicking at the like.

multiple text messages that I've missed. that have, you know, approvals that I. need to get to and deadlines that need. to be met. That's the season I'm in. right now. >> It's funny, it's like I want to be that. girl that's not like I look at my phone, but I'm like, "Oh [ __ ] I am that. person." It's like I look at my phone, I. check and I'm like, "I need to stop.". >> Yeah. And so I do, I I catch myself. I. would say like I try to. a balance is impossible to sustain all. the time. It's just you have to. recalibrate. >> Okay, good answer. What's the worst.

habit you have? >> You know what it used to be? Biting my nails. These are my actual nails, y'all. I do. not bite my nails no more. >> I am so bad at that and that's why I. just do gel cuz I'm like, "Okay." Who is. the first celebrity that actually left. you starstruck? >> Oh [ __ ]. Oh damn. You know what's so crazy? Okay, obviously you probably had the same. thing where it's like this is what we. do, right? So you're like play cool, play cool. And you'll meet some people.

and they're so much more like human and. chill than you thought they would be so. you're actually not as like, "Woo! Like. oh my god." You're actually like, "Oh, you're cool as [ __ ] Like we can have a. conversation and I don't feel what I. thought I was going to feel." In the. best way, not in a bad way. But I would. say when I did the Oscars for the first. time and I was doing the rehearsals on. the stage, I wasn't even starstruck by. the person themselves, but the photo. cards that they have of them. You know. how they have pictures of them? >> yeah, yeah. >> Girl, Denzel Washington. I WAS LIKE, "I'VE SEEN HIM IN SO MANY MOVIES. Like.

why is it that I'm freaking out right. now? Like he's going to be right there. when I'm when I'm singing." Like, "Huh?". >> That actually is such a good answer, too, cuz it's not like Denzel. Washington's like finding places to get. paparazzi. >> mega super famous people that are. obviously like so worthy of like kiss. the ground they walk on. You know, they're so incredible. >> No, that's a good answer. He's a. legend. Okay, what's the worst rumor you've ever. seen about yourself online? >> Look, I know AI is a touchy conversation.

these days. But I be seeing the craziest pictures of. myself. >> And they're fully AI. >> Crazy. >> Has it ever been so bad? >> what I'm going to look like when I'm. pregnant. She's giving cutsey. Like I'm. I'm here for it. >> Dude, that is that's getting scary. >> It's scary. >> What is the worst date you've ever been. on? >> Um I remember still till this day it is. I love food. So like if you have me. choose between you and food, I'm going.

to choose food. Because food's always been there for me, you know? Um I remember it was so. awkward. And like me and this guy were. like dating for some time, too. So it. was like, okay, you're getting a little. too comfortable and I don't like this. But it was something as simple as like. the food came and I was like eating and. I'm I do happy dances and like I don't. chew with my mouth open, but I take big. bites, you know? I want to get a little bit of everything. on the plate. And this. homeboy has the choice of words to say,

you know it's not going anywhere, right? Like okay. >> I would be [laughter]. so livid. >> No, I remember and I'm like [ __ ]. you brought me to Olive Garden. What did you think was going to happen? >> Okay, so he brought. >> Unlimited unlimited breadsticks. >> Wait, those breadsticks? >> And the pasta. >> They won't be there forever. >> technically, but it's so good. Like it's. the consistency. It's just, you know? >> The fettuccine alfredo.

>> Yeah. And you dip the breadstick in it. It's just. >> What was your reaction? >> No, I just remember I kept eating my. food. I was like, you're just background. noise right now. Like I'm now I'm going. to chew with my mouth open. I hope you. don't like me. Break up with me right. now. >> You're like, "I'm going to finish this. [laughter] and then I'm going to. actually leave you." But again, I'm not. leaving until I finish this meal. >> Yeah, uh and it's unlimited soup and. salad dish, so. >> Girl, >> [laughter]. >> oh I would be livid. Okay, what is your worst irrational fear?

>> Worst irrational fear? You know, I had a feeling we'd get into. like therapy talk eventually, but like. this is a little soon. >> Um I think just letting It's not really. irrational, I guess, but just like. letting the people I love down. Like. yeah, the people I love down is like. letting them down is just a It's a lot. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> So, let's get into therapy talk. >> Yes, let's [clears throat] do it, girl. >> Call Her Daddy is brought to you by. Depop. I feel like we all have that one.

chair in our bedroom that becomes the. I'll deal with it later pile. Well, for. me, >> [laughter]. >> that pile has slowly taken over my. entire chair and the whole floor and the. whole room, okay? And there are pieces. in there that I have been meaning to. sell since my 2020 tie-dye sweats era. Yes, I know, let's not talk about, you. know, also the barrel jeans phase. Guys, remember that? That trend was just. simply not for me, okay? It came and. went quickly, thankfully. Um but that's. where Depop comes in because what feels.

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So, you keep more of your money. Amazing. We love to hear it. And you. don't even need a printer, you can. choose a convenient drop-off and call it. a day. Whether you're cleaning out your. closet, looking for a Friday night out. outfit, or just experimenting with your. style, Depop has something for everyone. and every style. If your closet needs a. reset, start with Depop. Download the. Depop app now and start listing today. Okay, so take me back. Tell me about. growing up in Los Angeles. Like, what.

was your community like? >> I mean, um I'm a proud um. Inglewood native and I'm a proud. Chicana, Mexican-American. I'm one of 19. grandchildren on my mom's side and one. of 15 on my dad's. There's grandbabies. or great-grandbabies now, so I'm an. athea. I have nieces and nephews. Um and. my baby sister just had a baby, too, so. the family just keeps growing. So, I. grew up around a lot of community. It as. my grandma would say, like mi pueblito,

like my little village. Like, this is. this was everything for us growing up. So, I feel like I grew up feeling. supported and feeling like I was never. truly alone, even though obviously you. go through things in life that sometimes. you do feel lonely in. Um I always had. like my tribe. >> You had all these people, yeah. >> and I would say Inglewood, you know, it's a predominantly brown and black. community. Um I grew up watching the. airplanes take off from LAX and land.

into LAX and I would always wonder, "Where are those planes going and where. are they coming from, you know?". And now like it's so crazy to. fast-forward to where my life is now and. I'm still here. I'm still in LA. I'm a. proud Angelino. Um but I'm on the planes. now and I get to see my my grandparents'. houses, depending on which side of the. plane I'm sitting on, cuz if you know. LAX and you're on a plane, if you're on. the right side, you can see Inglewood on. the right side. And if you're on the. left side, you can see Hawthorne. And. that's kind of like the South Bay. Like, that's like where my my family is from.

>> It is so crazy that like no matter how. successful you get and where your life. takes you, you still connect that. younger version of yourself where like. that little girl was like, "I want to be. on one of those planes one day and like. I want to see the world." And now every. time you're on a plane you're looking. down being like, "Oh my gosh, I'm the. girl on the plane now." which is really. sweet. >> Um. I do know that at 9 years old you. decided to start working to help support. your family which is like that is really. really young. That's about like third.

grade. Did it feel like a choice at the. time? >> It did. I think older me now looking back at it. considering the circumstances, there was. definitely pressure, external pressure. um just from the the system I think. around me. to to step up in some kind of way, but. one thing I admire about little Becks is. that she was very much the driver of her.

life. Even if she wasn't, she was convinced. she was. And I I think this is a theme. with like I'm the oldest of four kids. I. have two younger brothers and a little. sister. And you just always got to know. Like even if I don't know, I got to. know. I got to figure it out, you know? So um I very much knew what I was. getting myself into. I very much wanted. to pursue this. considering that no one else in my. family had ever worked in the. entertainment industry. it was kind of out of the blue that all.

of a sudden because I saw a random. Shirley Temple, you know, uh multi uh. VHS videos growing up that I was like, "Oh, she did it. I could do it, too.". you know, or Dakota Fanning and um and. so I I yeah, I just I just did it. >> And I think what's interesting is like. having this passion that you were like, "I want to do this." like no one told me. to do this. Like I really wanted to do. this. But, then inevitably, especially I. think in the entertainment industry,

because you're around so many adults, like you are forced to grow up quickly. in a way that no one can really prepare. you for. And like. in what ways, I guess, did being praised for being I'm assuming. getting called mature like a lot of. young girls do? Yes, like how did getting called mature. and strong. reinforce those traits as like the. oldest daughter to like step up and to. take everything on yourself? >> I think it does feel very rewarding when.

you're young. You're like, "Oh, I'm. doing something good. I'm doing. something right." Um me today is like. there's no such thing as good or bad or. right or wrong. There just is. And I. think I very much was just trying to. survive the circumstances that I was. living. And when we lost our home, which was. kind of like the catalyst as well as uh. and I talk about this in my documentary. actually, but um the addiction kind of. playing a a huge part in in the four. walls that I was growing up with with my.

dad being an addict. Um we had nothing. We found ourselves living in my. grandparents' converted garage. It's six. of us. And, you know, there was no. insulation. Uh we we did have carpet. It was just. rolled out on the ground though. It was. concrete on the other side, so it wasn't. soft or plushy, but it was carpet. Um. and it was it wasn't tough though. Like, you're a kid, there's a bit of naivety. that I think was in my favor if that. makes sense. Because I was like, "Oh, it's a big sleepover every single.

night." Like, "Oh, I'm sharing a bed. with my baby sister. Like, oh, cuddles, you know?" Like, it was never. looked at as something that I was like. ashamed of. At least not yet, because in. that time you're so young. You don't. really know what's happening. Or you do, you have an idea, but you. can't really do something about it. You. know? So, you're just you're just making. with what you've got. >> And like when you talk about how, you. know, addiction in those four walls, like when you look back, like how long.

do you feel like you were in survival. mode of like there's nothing I can. really do. I just got to I just got to. get up every day and go do my thing. >> I mean, the truth is is it's. generational. Yeah. It's generational and I I think. when you. and anybody I think who's probably. tuning in knows, if you you've grown up. around addiction, um. it is there's something there. It's It's. not always just drugs. It's not always. just alcohol, you know, sometimes it's. work.

Um there's a an avoidance of type that. fuels this this deeper wound and that is. absolutely generational, you know, so. this is before my parents. This is. before my my grandparents even. Um and I have a lot of empathy around. that for sure, but. I I would say then the the moment I came. out, you know, I had young high school. sweetheart parents who who got married. straight out and were like, "We want to. have a family." And by the time my mom. was 23, she had all four kids.

>> And I think what's so interesting when. something is generational, it's like. it inevitably is so hard to [snorts] not. have it just be this like normalized. understood thing that it actually takes. someone going against the grain and. making things like a little. uncomfortable or calling things out to. actually have it not continue to be this. transgenerational trauma, but that takes. such an effort to break. And so, when. you are such a young child,

how are you going to do anything other. than like fall in line and play your. role? And then eventually, when you have. some more autonomy, then you'll be able. to look back and be like, "Huh, what. would I have changed about that. dynamic?" But until you have that, there's nothing you can really do. And I. think something that could be really. relatable to the audience watching is. like it makes me think back to that word. mature as a young girl. Like. you shouldn't have to be mature at such. a young age. So, when you are given that.

validation that makes you feel like. you're in the inner circle of adults, it's intoxicating. But, what it really. is when you get older, you look back, you're like, "That's really [ __ ]. dangerous to tell a young woman like. you're so mature, you're so strong.". It's like, "But, should I have had to be. that mature and strong?" Like, did you. ever feel like "Why am I carrying a lot. of this weight?". Like, did it When did that click for. you? Cuz I'm assuming it did. >> It absolutely did. It manifested. physically before it did uh with like. full conscious awareness. So, a lot of.

my symptoms were. um full-blown panic attacks, multiple a. day. Um. chronic people-pleasing. I just the words no, like the way my. body would just like literally like. contortion in a sense. If I like really. felt to know and I had to say it and. then and most times I would fold and I'd. be like, "Okay, well, maybe not." Like, because I'd see the reaction on the. other side. Growing up in this industry. longer than I've ever not been doing it, it was like the perfect storm.

So, it starts within the household, right? The four walls that I grew up in. But, then the conditioning that happens. in the industry, it's very rewarding. when you start to gain success for being. such a chronic people-pleaser. Cuz. you're like, "Wow, you love me. You You. choose me when I'm doing what you want. me to do.". >> But, what you're also though saying, Becky, is like you grew up in a place. where you were people-pleasing. So, like.

>> times did I have to say yes? >> Right. So, no wasn't really a part of. your life. >> an option. It didn't feel like it. >> Can you also talk about you mentioned. earlier, which I think so many people. will relate to, is also the added level. of complexity of being the eldest. daughter. >> Oh, girl, you want to get into birth. order theories? We can do that. We can. do all of attachment theories. I. I am definitely someone who I think in. the beginning was like, oh, I'm just an.

empath. Like that just is, you know, like and and I am. I am somebody who. chooses to lead with. you know, kindness and awareness around. how someone is allowed to feel, how they. want to feel, even if it doesn't align. with where I am at. But that's like the. progress part that I've gotten to. If we. rewind a few years ago, yeah, I was like, oh, I'm just I have to. be a self-sacrificer. I have to give up mine for the greater. good. I have to, you know, think.

logically and not about how I actually. feel. And I think a lot of. firstborns feel that way. But what's. cool about learning about birth order. theory, cuz I'm the oldest of four and I. will stand 10 toes down for my brothers. and my sister. I'm so thankful that they. exist and they are my best friends. Um. they didn't have it easy either. You know? So, it's not that like. firstborns have it the hardest, but it's.

that we have a different version of our. parents. >> Mhm. >> All of us do. >> It's such a good point because I have. friends who are the oldest child and. that is so in line with what they've. said. And then also I think any of my. friends who are the oldest and had some. instability in their home, a lot of. times we talk about how. a parentified child develops such a high. EQ because you're so hyper aware of. every single person's emotions in your.

family and it almost forces you to be. one step ahead of every situation so. that you know, like this is how I'll. solve it, this is how I'll handle it, like this is going on with my parents, like this is how I'm going to save my. siblings, this is how I'm going to save. myself, this is how I'm going to fix the. situation, and you're constantly having. to be ahead and thinking of everyone but. yourself, and it's. hard to realize that everyone's emotions. are not your responsibility. >> Yeah. >> And I'm curious if you have any advice. now as you've like clearly done a lot of. work on yourself and lived a lot of life.

to anyone who is watching that has still. that like weight or burden of being the. oldest child and taking on so much. responsibility. >> Yeah. Okay, wait. As you're saying this, it's literally making me think about. there was a time. where I. Oh my god, this is going to be really. embarrassing to share. I don't think. I've ever shared this story, but um. I remember I was we were going through a. lot as a family, and I was like I was.

offered this opportunity to be a part of. like this like Disney holiday. experience, and I was going to perform, and it was going to be the coolest thing. ever. And I, me and my family, we're. from Cali, like we loved going to. Disneyland growing up, and my baby. sister had never been to Disney World. before. So, I was like, "Oh my god, like, you know, things are not so good. at home. I'm going to take my baby. sister to Disney World. This is going to. be amazing. Um I'm going to do some work, but we're. going to have a good time.". I. do drinks around the world.

in Epcot. and have one too many, and I wake up in my hotel room, and I'm like, "Wait, the sun hasn't even gone down. yet? Like what happened?" Like I was in. full panic mode, palpitations. Like I'm sweating. I'm looking at my. sister, and the moment I look at her, I. just start crying, and I'm like, "I'm so. sorry.". And my sister's like crying, but she's. like laughing. She's like This is my.

baby sister, guys. And we're because. we're going through so much at home, I. was like, I wanted like take her to have. a break from everything that we've been. going through. And then here I am. getting all topsy-turvy, upside down. >> Yeah, but it sounds like Becky, it's cuz. you needed a break. >> Girl, I had a complete breaking point. And I'm over here crucifying myself, right? And I'm like, I'm the worst. sister on the planet. Like, I can't. believe I did this. Like, I ruined the. trip. Like, I'm so sorry. I'm like. profusely apologizing to her. I'm.

apologizing to my girls who are on the. trip. Uh Morgan, who we were talking. about earlier, my stylist. Shout out to. Morgan. Um you know, and and so it was like a. very small group of us. And I I called. them to the room and I like I'm like. putting on this like, you know, confessional. like apology of like why I did what I. did and I'm explaining myself. And. they're literally looking at me like, "Are you serious right now?". As they're still tipsy, by the way. >> Wait, they're like, "Girl, >> They're like, "Do you know what I have. done blackout drunk?". >> And also like, "You all of us are here.

because of you. You You were looking at. your sister being like, I am going to. give you the reprieve that you need.". Meanwhile, it's like, what we just. talked about like, "Hey, actually, seems. like someone may need a a little bit. more.". >> Me. I needed it a little bit more. >> Right. >> And yeah, me pasé de copa. And I was. just like, And I I walked away from it being like, "Wait." And so it just led to an a much. more open conversation around other. young women my age who were like, "Wait,

don't do this to yourself." Like, "By the way, you know that's like a. thing, right? People go drinking around. Epcot and it's like a challenge of like. how far can you go? And [ __ ] you made. it to Frozen. Like, you were like, 'Let. it go, let it go.' And we were like, 'Yes, like let it go.'". >> And you're in your head thinking you. ruined everyone's time. And you're like, "Oh my god, I ruined. this whole thing." And it's like, "Girl, you couldn't. >> Because of those people-pleasing. tendencies where you're like it's you're.

so hardwired essentially. >> Yeah. >> ready for the worst-case scenario, ready. to make sure that everyone else is. comfortable, and everyone's like Becky, go back to bed. You're like, oh. >> Yeah, that's. >> That's just like a good example. Like, you know how some people are just like, "Girl, I don't even remember what. happened. Wasn't that so funny?" No, I. was like, "Oh my god, I don't even. remember what happened. Like, how did we. get back? Like. oh my god, I put my baby sister in the. worst position." As if she's not also. like a whole like grown ass young woman. herself, you know? And so, it was just.

like one of those times where I was. like, "Yo, I need to check in with. myself. And I need to like dive into. this. Like, why am I hanging myself up. for something that. should actually lead me to more. curiosity?". >> Yes, like what is going on? >> Yeah. >> And it's like what's so crazy cuz I have. siblings, too, and I'm the youngest, but. it's like when you have dynamics with. your siblings, no matter how old you. get, >> Mhm. >> you still kind of see each other in. those four walls that you grew up in.

And so, when you are around your. siblings, like my siblings and I have. had some really beautiful conversations. around like regressing almost when we're. around each other cuz like I still feel. like the baby, and you still feel like. my oldest sister, and like there's so. much history that you meet adults, and. you're a completely different person to. these people that you're interacting. with. They don't see you as the oldest. daughter. They don't see you as someone. who was trying to help provide for them. So, there's like so much ingrained in. family dynamics that are so beautiful,

but also like they can be really big. wounds that you have to like actively. recognize and be like, "Girl, your baby. sister is fine. You took her to. Disneyland, and she's a big enough adult. that she could have managed herself. You. can't ruin her time.". >> continued. Like, I stayed in the room, I. ate some chicken nuggets, and I. definitely was like, "I need to sober up. and take a shower." But, the The. continued with the vibes and the Disney. of it all and everything was fine. Everything was totally fine. By the way, I was like, is there pictures, is there. videos? Like, did somebody catch me up. going and they were like, no. Like, you.

were so normal. Like, you were so fine. But, I was going through so much. >> Panicking. >> That I like completely shut off and. like, you know, I think that that that. is like a really good example of like. just how. far on the spectrum you can go of like. codependency, people pleasing. Like, you. don't give yourself any space and grace. to just be a young 20-something-year-old. figuring it out. >> to say it also feels like. from your upbringing, like you really.

had to be in such control at all times. cuz there was no plan B, there was no. safety net. It's like, you need to. figure this out cuz there's no other. option. And um I know you had a. complicated relationship with your. father. How did that dynamic influence. like decisions you made growing up as a. child? >> You know, it's really interesting. looking back at it now. I think I had a. lot of anger. Um anger wasn't an easy emotion for me.

to process. Obviously, they say anger is sadness, what is it? Sadness is a bodyguard. And so, my anger I would put towards my. career. I just thought that the more successful. I became, the more. I made, uh. the less this would be an issue. And if. I became a better husband to my mother. and I became a better father to my. siblings, then, you know, maybe he'll.

figure it out. You can't do the work for someone else, you know? And I I wish, yes, of course, you can't go back in time, but I wish. younger me. had someone. to to lean on and also hear that from. Because it is this like unspoken. permission that you give yourself to. say, "You know what? Not my problem.". >> It takes a long time to get there. >> a lot and when it feels like the whole.

entire family system depends on you for. that. And by the way, every person who. plays a part in that system feels the. same way, right? So it's like like I. said, it's just like unspoken thing, but. yeah, it's definitely something that I. wore for a really long time and there. was a lot of avoidance with that with my. dad and I I just tried to out dad my. dad. That's how I became a big daddy. You know? >> How do you think like that. essentially sounds like yes, anger and.

resentment towards your father. Like how. do you think it impacted your view of. like just like authoritative figures at. young age? Like did you respect male. figures and adults? Were you scared of. them? >> I think it made me more vulnerable. I. didn't necessarily respect my dad and. we've had many conversations about this. I had no respect for him and in the. choices that he was making. I still had. love for him and so the care to want to. continue to move things along for the. sake of my siblings and their mental.

health and their emotional well-being. That desperate need was was very much. present, but it made me vulnerable to. looking to other men in the industry to. be like the one who is going to look out. for me. Like big brother figures or. other father figures and like these. people are not your daddy. They are not. your big brother. They are They can be. healthy partners actually in business, but if you put this like very young. filter on it, you are you're like, "Wow, no one's ever looked out for me or. believed in me in that way." And you you.

hold the keys to to to the the treasure. box that I'm I'm trying to unlock of of. what's going to get me to where it is. that I I know I can get. And so you are. you absolutely are vulnerable to it, but. that was something that I needed to work. through. That wasn't anyone else's. fault, you know? >> That point, too, and I bet so many women. will relate to what you're talking about. is like the feeling of never-ending, like you just said, like I wanted to. out-dad my dad. >> Yeah. >> That is like. such a heavy thing to feel cuz.

you're you're never going to be the dad. of your family, but you tried, clearly. And then that's going to like linger, yes, into these male relationships where. you're like, "Can you play this one role. that I needed in this role?" Like. what did out-dadding your dad look like. in your childhood for you? >> Yeah, I mean, I became the sole provider. for my family by 16 years old. >> Girl. >> Yeah. And it looked like being at, you know, peaks on charts and not having any. health insurance. Because when you were going to.

entertainment industry, you know how. that goes. Like, it's not you don't. health insurance isn't built into a. record deal, you know? Like, these are. things that, you know, uh I was able to. provide for myself, but like. when it came to my family, I was like, "My dad's losing his job. Like, my. siblings got to get through school. Tuitions have to get paid." Like, and. they deserve to. play sports if they want to, like, cuz. they're good at it. And and I I I have. an escape. They deserve an escape, too. So, it was like I just needed to produce.

more than for myself, but for everyone. else since Yeah, since my very, very. early teen years. >> It's so much pressure to put on. yourself. >> Yeah, it it was. It was a lot. >> Was anyone there to. support you? >> I think that people were there to. support me in the best ways they knew. how to. Yeah, I think my mom. Oh my god, my mom is my girl. Like, my. mom is is somebody who even when she. didn't know.

what was going on, I think she had. a good read on things. I remember there. getting uh it getting to a point where. um I had worked so hard to to to get far. in my career and optically things were. very successful. Behind closed doors. things were not very successful. Um. financially, you know, I was carrying a. lot of weight. And so if I was just a. single girl living on her own, like I'd. be just fine, but I'm providing for my. whole family and you know, it looks a.

lot different. And so. I remember just kind of like. finally like looking up and being like, "Wow, I'm still here.". Like I'm still here and not in a good. way. Like I haven't moved forward. Like I'm. still in the same neighborhood I grew up. in. I'm still dealing with the same [ __ ]. when it comes to like my parents and. their marriage. I'm still carrying these. weights. I'm still and I and I thought I.

I reached like a milestone at that point. that many my age hadn't even really. breached. And I was still hung up on the. fact that like. but we're still here. Like you know, and. and I think that my mom when she's. witnessing me in that moment, you know, it gets to a point where you have a. breaking point. You're like, "I this. pressure is unbearable that like I don't. even want to exist anymore.". And I remember my mom grabbing me by the. face and telling me, "You could choose. to never pick up a microphone ever again.

and I promise you it's okay.". Like. you you're good. We'll figure it out. We've always figured it out. Like it's. not on you. This isn't on you." And she. took that off of me. >> Were you able to fully hear that though? Like could you believe it? >> RECEIVE IT. GIRL, THAT'S A whole other. thing. Was I willing to receive it? No. Because again, the system isn't it's. it's subconscious. It's not I don't. think our parents go through life. saying, "I want to cause our kids harm.". I don't think our grandparents do that. saying, "I want to cause my kids harm.".

You know, these are just things that. systemically exist, you know? And so. when I say it's generational, like it's. generational. And so I'm like, yeah, but. somebody's got to do it cuz if I don't, who else will? And that was the voice. that kept me. going for really long time. until I ended up in therapy and I was. like, yeah, I can't. This isn't. sustainable. >> Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Uber. Eats. You already know Uber Eats delivers your. late-night cravings and your favorite.

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today and get your glam delivered. straight to your door. Check app for. availability. Delivery fees may apply. >> I feel like so much of our dynamic with. our parents shapes the partners we. choose and how we show up in. relationships. Like looking back, how do. you think your upbringing influenced the. relationships that you were drawn to? >> Oh, tremendously. Tremendously. I think the first time we. ever experience love is through our.

parents' eyes. You know? And it's yes, of course, in the way they. love us, but also in the way they love. each other. And I think I grew up in a culture, I. mean, it's going to sound funny, but it. was like very ride or die. And like me today is like, if I ride, why do I got to die? Like, why do we got to die? Where are we. going? I want to know. Like, if I'm. riding, there's some conditions here. There's some boundaries that I'd like to. put in place, you know? But it was very.

much this like my grandma would say this. phrase to my mom with my dad and in. regards to their marriage. Like, ponte. las guantes, mija. Like, put put your. gloves on. Like, you're going to fight. for your marriage. And I remember being young and being. like, well, that's very one-sided. Like, shouldn't it be both sides? Like, shouldn't it be. But you can only meet people as deep as. they've met themselves. And I think my. mom had a very profound way of loving. Um. and my dad did, too, but it just looked. very differently.

You know? It looked very different. >> I know you grew up in a household where. one of your parents cheated. And then in. your documentary, you opened up about. being betrayed by your partner. How did. you decide to share that with the world? >> You know, I remember going into that. process with the documentary in. particular and there being conversations. about, are you going to talk about this? You know, very public situation. Are you. not going to talk about it? And I was. like, well, we're going to talk about. it. We have to. To me, I've always.

believed like half a truth is still a. lie. And. uh. there was conversations about like, well, I would I just wouldn't even. mention it. Like, some people don't even. know what happened. Like, some people. don't even even are looking for it. And. I'm like, yeah, but how can I have been. in a relationship with someone for so. many years and do a body of work, you. know, uh that's supposed to really. capture where I am in this time in my. life and also my history. and control all delete and pretend that.

this person never existed, you know, and. I was. in many relationships, but particularly. in a long-term relationship since I was. 19 years old. And I know that there's like things. online about like the 19 theory, like. you know, when you go I think anybody. who gets into uh a serious relationship. at a young age. isn't conscious of the fact that you are. going to shed and you are going to go. through seasons. And that doesn't stop. necessarily, but in your younger adult years, I think.

I had a very strong sense of self based. off of old programming. And when I. went through this very public situation. with my partner, it was like. this like awakening. It was this like. moment of like. oh, there's a massive misalignment in who I. thought I was. and who I actually am. And I think that. that happens a lot for people who grow.

up in family systems where it's like you. can see it on someone else. So easy to. judge someone else and say, "Oh my god, like don't you see it?". You know? And then you can find yourself on the. other side of that table the next day. and be like, "Wait, hold on. Not everything is what it seems. And. also, I am not my mother and he is not. my father. And so there's also the. possibility that there's an opportunity. here. for there to be some healing, whether. together or not. Um.

an opportunity though, nonetheless, to. really practice. what it is to be the person that I know. I want to be in this world versus who I. thought I was, right? And and and that's. like going so far back into again the. conditioning of the chronic people. pleasing and like. wanting to just say yes and wanting to. be like sweep it under the rug and keep. it moving, you know? >> Yeah, and even like I appreciate you. saying that because I think.

having had like you just like we're. talking about like watching your. father cheat on your mother and being. like, "Okay, I have a documentary moment. where I have something playing out in my. life that to me at face value could look. like I'm reliving what happened to my. parents. But now I need to assess it and be like, I can't let my my [ __ ] from my past. influence like what is how I feel right.

now with this partner and what do I want. to do? Like do you mind talking about. just like when you found out? Like how. did it affect you cuz you're obviously. in such a more healed place now, but. like I've been there. I have been there. girl where like I stayed with someone. who cheated and I wanted to stay, but I. was it was so complicated cuz those. decisions are like people are judging, you don't know how to react. Like how. did you handle all this in the moment? >> I think also you saying like you wanting. to stay, it's interesting cuz your want.

isn't enough. Like you can want it so bad, but that's. just not enough. You know, and I think that understanding. where that want comes from is also. really important. Cuz if you're just doing it to want to. prove other people wrong, then you're just doing it for others and. that's not a good place, you know, to. come from and it's interesting because. well, I first off I've never talked. about this. So it it is uh I'm thankful. for the safe space to to be able to talk. about it because some of the stuff that. I was challenged with.

um there's a private heartbreak that's. taking place and then there's a public. heartbreak that's taking place. And both. are extremely painful. But what was I. think the hardest part for me to. navigate through was giving myself that. space and grace to make that decision. for myself. Um and that was one of those. moments where it was an opportunity for. me to heal. and look inward as to, okay, whether. it's. this person or another person that I get. into a relationship with, I'm capable of. still making these same decisions.

So, this is more than just like a well, let me be the Barbie that everybody. wants me to be and play uh Cupid with. all of these cute guys in the industry. that everybody wants me to be with and. because my life is supposed to be. entertainment for other people or um let. me um. you know, really listen to what other. people's. uh. perception is on what an empowered woman. is. Um you know, this very binary thinking,

right? I wanted to go there. I really. did. Oh man, the therapy sessions that I. had of this like very black and white. space that I was existing in and it's. like, you know, and and it was. very clear to me that it was a space. where I needed to decide for myself. >> But that's so hard, Becca, cuz like I I. think we all know like there, especially. cuz you were handling it in the public. and private like you just said, there is. such a loud narrative, especially for. women, of like, if you stay, you don't. respect yourself. If you stay, you're.

weak. And like what what is your take on. that assumption and how did you manage. to like block that out and be like, what. do I want? >> It's interesting you say that. There's a. a quote that Esther Perel, who I know. you've even spoken to, who I love. I. have the biggest girl crush on her. I remember hearing something along the. lines of like, you know, back in the. days, women used to be shamed for. leaving. It was just a mistake. How.

could you leave? How could you throw it. all away? You know, he can change. And. then now it's like the opposite. Now. it's like if you stay, you're a dumb. [ __ ] You You're a dumb [ __ ] You so. stupid. I cannot believe her. Oh my god, I could never I could never. And it's. like the girls who would say I could. never, like I actually love that for. you. I love that that's where you started, that that was your ground zero. That was. not my ground zero. My ground zero was people pleasing,

self-sacrificing, doing what other people wanted me to do, forgetting that I mattered in that. equation, and this was an opportunity in. my life. to. unlock and go inward and make this about. me, which was so uncomfortable. You. know, it's really really uncomfortable. to go in where you say, "Wait, this is. about me and what I want." And if you. know me, you know that I do not make. decisions passively. And it was so hard. to shut out the noise. And the insiders. say, "She didn't She didn't even say.

anything. They just swept it under the. rug and kept it moving." Like No, I. called off my engagement. I took off my ring. Like there are. things here that took place behind. closed doors, privately, between me and this person who I love. and care for deeply, who I've been. betrayed by. And like we could go into. the spectrum of betrayal because it. looks different for everybody. But the. thing about betrayal is. it doesn't just make you not trust the. other person. You don't trust yourself anymore.

And so that was like, "This ain't even. about you anymore. This isn't even about. them anymore. This is about me.". And there was something so empowering. about that process to say, "No, I come. first. This is about me. What do I. want?" And. there has to be alignment with the. person on the other side. Like I said. earlier, like the want isn't enough. The love isn't enough. Like it Love is. it's it's a beautiful thing to.

experience for someone, but I mean. considering everything I went through. with my family, like I I walked away. from my dad. Like it wasn't something. that I wasn't willing to do. And so, I. think the misalignment from how. from a public perspective, how it was so. and I'm not really like a controversial. person, you know, maybe getting getting. blackout drunk in Disney World is. probably the most controversial thing. I've done. So, it was so unfamiliar for. me to kind of like wear this like I. don't know. This thing that was.

projected onto me that I am like not an. empowered woman, that I'm a. contradiction about what I sing about. And it's like, no, those feelings are. real. What I sing about is real. Like. those there's so much more nuance to. emotions. Like you're putting me in a. box. And everything I've ever worked for. is now being squeezed into. this tiny like I'm put to be this small. all of a sudden. And it's like everything else I had ever. worked on didn't matter anymore. And. like of course I was.

You think I was mad at everybody in the. world? Like I was mad at him, too. I was. like, come on. Why do I got to be put in. this position, you know? >> It's so hard. It's like almost like when. someone experiences it with their. friends and family not wanting them to. go back. Like. imagining that heightened to the 100th. degree where the world is like, what are. you doing? What are you doing? And then. putting the world aside for a second, cuz I think this can be really. relatable. Cuz again, I went through it.

Like how did you navigate the emotions. of feeling so hurt, but loving someone. so much? >> I think that emotions aren't forever. They're temporary. They come and they. go. I can't make life decisions based. off of other people's emotions in my. comment section. You know, I think when. you are a person on a platform or of. some type of celebrity. and fame, you are a bit of like a mirror.

to other people sometimes and they think. they're seeing you, but really what. they're seeing is themselves. And so. maybe they've gone through something and. that's why when when a girl stands out. on her I could never, I'm like, "Girl, at from now this point on I could. never." Trust me when I say I just had. to get there. Like I said, their zero. was that. Mine. had to be learned, experienced, felt, processed. um and and really like worked on with. real professional intervention before I. could make that decision. And that what. was that's what was really I guess um.

important to me when it came to the. documentary like talking about it. I was. you know, some people were like, "It's. very unresolved. Like are they together? Are they not?" And I was like, "Well, that that's what it was. It was 3 years. ago and it was unresolved. We didn't. know what was we were going to we were. committed to working on it and we were. committed to figuring it out because. when you spend that much time with. someone, it's not that. you want to forgive and forget. You almost have to remember. You have to remember. what you come from.

And the hurt that's been caused to know. that you don't want to be capable of. ever doing that to someone else ever. again. And I got to experience that and I did. there were close people to me with. enough I think discernment to know that. people who don't know me don't should. not have a say in what I do with my. life. Um but there was people in my. close circle who were protective of me. of course who were just as hurt and and. upset about what happened but also. just as curious and also just as.

um supportive of the figuring it out. because if if this was going to end, it. was going to end amicably. It was going. to end with clarity and with real. resolution and with respect because. that's that's what I deserve. You know? And if it's going to continue. uh in the words of Esther Perel, I I. love her. Um it's got to be a new relationship. Because what was can no longer be. anymore. And I know that there's a lot. of things with like betrayal, you know,

in relationships. Any type of betrayal. trauma in general, it's like it'll never. be the same again. But maybe that's the. point. You know? >> Yeah, it's such a it is such a great. point. Can I ask, are you still. together? >> Girl. Yes. Yes. >> Okay, so can we talk about like one, how. does it feel right now just like talking. about this for the first time? >> Well, I'm happy for you because I. remember in the days, weeks, and like. months following when this happened to. me. Um.

when this happens, like your your. reality is so shattered because like you. said, you don't trust yourself. You. don't trust him. You're like, wait, what. what what just happened? I'm really. struggling to. understand how we got here. How did you. stabilize your reality? And what. questions did you need to start asking. yourself that you're kind of referring. to that got you to the place where you. knew you wanted to move forward? >> I think removing myself from the. relationship. Yeah, and in a way that was.

um. about not just like self-preservation, obviously. Like I was. distraught and and and broken in a lot. of ways. But I think it was more like removing. myself from the context of anyone I've. ever had to be something to. So it was much deeper. Like what came. from this revelation wasn't just like my. romantic relationship with this. particular person. It's like every. romantic relationship I've ever been in. Uh. every family relationship I've ever had.

Every business Girl, every business. relationship I've ever had. How How many dynamics have I been in. where this version of myself has been in. the driver seat? And and really taking. the time to evaluate it, feel it, understand it, and then come to a place. where then my needs, my wants are a lot. more clear. And then getting to. you know, a What is it called? Like. conscious uncoupling? You know, like.

conscious uncoupling to then be like, this is the new baseline. Is there still. alignment and where does that we see. ourselves? You know, and that was really. empowering, not just for me, I think for. the for the both of us, but. but especially for me. Like getting to a. place where I was like, oh no, like I'm. allowed to change, I'm allowed to. evolve, and I'm allowed to exist in this. so much differently. And if I'm capable. of doing it, what actions are you doing. that proves that you are committed to. the same thing? And that takes time. Like that doesn't.

happen in weeks. That doesn't even. happen in months. Like this happens with. continued effort and experiences and. willingness and and it's it's that. commitment to being different on on both. sides. I'd say that really is what. unlocks the the healing of it all. >> How did you. start to rebuild trust? And like how did. he meet you there? Cuz I think it it. really can't just yes be on the person.

who was the person who strayed. Like you. also, like you're saying, have to take. accountability to also be like, I'm not. going to hold this over your head. I am. choosing to move forward. Like what did. rebuilding that trust look like for both. of you? >> I think you just know. I think it's just it's so it is. uh I I remember being like, okay, well, I can't trust my gut cuz my gut has led. me into some funny places, right? If I'm. always going based off of survival mode. So like really. um I don't think overanalyzing it, but.

really being honest with yourself at. what part is coming up. Like I did in in. individual therapy and family therapy. and couples therapy, like I do a lot of. parts work and it's so helpful for me. because it makes me understand that I'm. not just. this version of myself right now. I'm. every version and this one and will be. many more. You know, so like that grace. that we were talking about before was. something that I felt like I needed to. take my time with and so it was just it. was just me. I was really like learning.

to give myself the space and empowering. myself with the experiences, with. professional intervention especially, to. be able to. to feel good about this decision because. like I said, I think that whole like it. it'll never be the same again. Like. something about that was actually. exciting. Like oh, there can be something new and it's like. oh, I'm not the same version of myself. that I was when I was 19 when you first. met me. You're not the same person that.

you were at 22 when I first met you. Like we are. very or 23 and very different versions. of ourselves today, you know? And and so. I don't know. It's just this like earned. wisdom, I guess you can say that kind of. is the guide in that. >> And I think what's so powerful what. you're talking about and very relatable. is how you're talking about it's not. just you as Becky at this age going. through this with your partner. It's. still like I we talked about the.

beginning of this is like the younger. you. watching your dad cheat on your mom and. watching your mom with like the boxing. glove analogy and being like, "Well, why. do I got to die? Like why do I got to. ride or die?" Like what if we can have. these honest conversations. to go back a little bit to your. childhood. How did you really really. have to consciously. work to be like, "My emotions right now are about my. partner in this or are my emotions right.

now about what my father did to my. mother and how am I going to try to. differentiate the two?" was. >> evident to me from the from the from the. beginning, I think. Um. at least in this season of my life when. when this took place, and so. yeah, I knew I couldn't trust myself in. that moment to make any decision. It was. like It was again very binary in my. thinking. It was like, "You're either a. [ __ ] yes or absolutely not." And it was. like, "I'm going to end up in the same. situation if not here with someone else,

and I need to take this time to figure. out why." Like, why? What is the why? >> I remember, I think it's in your. documentary, you kind of talk about how. your dad wasn't like. entirely secretive about his infidelity. with you, and it put you in some really. difficult situations. Like, how when you. look back at your younger self, do you. think those moments impacted you as a. little girl? >> Yeah, it Of course it impacts you. I. think it definitely leaves an impression. of like.

"Oh, so that just happens.". And like younger me, teenage me, outworking my dad, being a better. husband, being a better father, really. standing on my I could never. It's. different when you end up in your own. situations, you know? And like I said, it wasn't just this particular. relationship. It was like every. relationship I had ever been in was. a dynamic of me. hoping that things would be different. and masking this like subconsciousness. of.

passiveness around this. >> Mhm. >> To stay or to leave is anyone's choice. to make, you know, for themselves. And I made my choice, and I I made it. from parts of me that I, like I said, really worked on and earned. to feel good about that decision. But I also can see all the other sides. now, you know? And I It's really a. relief to be able to talk about it. because I know that there's so many. people who don't know me, fans who are. very supportive and very loving,

um you know, who who saw me kind of. going through this. from an outside lens, not knowing the details, not knowing. everything that actually happened, not. knowing that what you see is not always. what it is. Um and. and I feel like. for them to know like it wasn't. something that was done passively and it. wasn't something that wasn't done taking. everything into consideration. Um it's. not that it was important to me for. validation, but it was important for me. in the sense of standing up for myself.

>> Absolutely. And I also just to like. reiterate what you're saying, I think. it's so I can even feel it from you. I'm. also happy you're talking about it. because I can imagine. even if you don't give a [ __ ] about what. the internet says or whatever, like. it is a little bit of an attack on your. character when people are calling you. weak or whatever and you're like there's. so much that you don't owe people to. tell them the amount of work you were. doing behind the scenes. But what I what I would assume is like. this is one of the most amazing parts of.

your life now that you've worked through. it and this is someone you genuinely. love. And so to not be able to like feel. fully like you can celebrate it cuz. there has been this stigma. Like I hope. this now allows you to just like release. that and know that like. there shouldn't be judgement around this. and you shouldn't have had to explain. this, but now that you do, I can imagine. there are so many women listening being. like. okay, like how many of us have stayed. and it did work out and that's. beautiful. And if you didn't, that's for.

you, but we can't judge anyone's. situation, right? >> really knowing. It's interesting you say. I appreciate all of that. I will say. going back to like the peace that I. feel, I don't think it's that I was. waiting at all for anybody. I think it. was more just feeling like. I wanted to catch people up to speed on. my time instead of on other people's. time. Like going back to the pressure. cooker, like. I also wasn't hiding. Like we go to the. grocery store together. We, you know, like we have good times together. We are.

closest friends and family, you know, know what it is and and that's really. all that matters to me, but I think um. but it's that piece, you know, the the. difference between secrecy and privacy. was unclear to me at a young age growing. up in the industry with everything and. anything. And I think anybody who grew. up on the internet, like I got. discovered at 14 years old making covers. on YouTube. So I thought like what I eat. for breakfast everybody should know. When I take a [ __ ] on the toilet, hey. y'all, guess what I'm doing? Sitting on. the toilet.

You know, like all that era of like. real-time posting, like I don't know, it's my relationship with it is so. different and has definitely. um in in a more evolved way matured. that feels right-sized to the version of. me that I am today, which is I don't. have it all figured out. I am absolutely. not perfect. But do I feel empowered? Yes, because empowerment as a woman. isn't perfect. It's living in your truth. and standing in your truth and owning.

that there is a spectrum and array of. experiences and emotions and. opportunities that are going to be. taking place in this lifetime. And if. I'm not fully present for it, that's. where I'm really cutting myself short. And so to be fully present in this. moment with you talking about what it's. taken to get here, you know, from the. beginning up until this point is yeah, it feels really good. It feels really. liberating. It's it's kind of what's.

been inspiring everything I've been. working on. So. >> It's amazing cuz you can see how also. passionate you are about this current. era, I guess essentially you're in. Can you see yourself getting married? >> Can I see I absolutely, girl. Yeah, I. would love to. I'm like river bolts to. me. >> [laughter]. >> Why not? Promote to me every year. why. not? >> it. >> I've seen there was actually this really. cute TikTok trend about this woman who. was sharing that and I thought it was. adorable. But yeah, I guess it's to each.

their own, you know. >> I think something that's so. incredible about you is like your. so positive. And I think that when. people are faced with really difficult. situations in their life, not this. specifically, but just like everything. we're talking about, there's kind of a choice you have to. make. It's either going to define you or you. are going to take it and you're going to. grow from it. How have you managed to. reframe challenges in your life and be. so positive?

>> Can I just say this I can say the same. about you. >> No. >> No, I I actually think um like. PTG, [clears throat]. post-traumatic growth, is a choice. And. um I do think that there is a shift in. mentality that happened for me where it. was like I don't want to be a victim of. anything. I want to be a survivor of. things. And also we deserve so much more. than just to survive life, but to. actually thrive in it. And that is also. available to us, too. And so I can.

change my mind today and that's okay. And I can, you know, embrace different. versions of myself that thought they. knew what was best and not shame them or. judge them. Um and same for future versions of. myself. Like I can build her up and I. can be her greatest champion cuz I know. she's waiting for me like a relay. Like. this is this shit's a marathon, girl, and we are all running it with ourselves. and we just got to keep going, but. constantly, of course,

with connecting with ourselves, understanding like what is it actually. going to take of me? What is it going to. cost me? Cuz when I say yes to. something, I'm also saying no to. something else. And. if I'm saying no to something that. actually means more to me, like I should. take time to understand that, you know? Um and so with everything that's been. taking place with my growth now being. kind of the. the source of inspiration, um the phoenix that I feel that I am.

rising from the ashes of of so much that. I had to overcome in my younger years. I just feel like I know it sounds funny. and we talk about being a bad [ __ ] but. like man, like it feels really good to. know like I've always she's always been. there. This isn't like a new era. This. isn't like this is just an expansion of. who I am, you know? Like I'm just. evolving. >> And I think it's so inspiring for people. listening cuz like I. can assure everyone that you and I have.

both sat in moments in our life where it. has felt like the lowest and it has felt. so horrible. And the positive you can. tell yourself when you are going through. the toughest times is knowing. all of this is going to make you. stronger. And then you will sit here one. day like Becky G being like girl, I feel. like a bad [ __ ] I feel confident. And. it's like because the amount of things. that try to chip away at your confidence. and your self-esteem, if you do not. become a victim of those circumstances.

and you actually use it as power and. strength, you end up just being like oh. I am unstoppable. As corny as it sounds, like I think for women it's important to. hear cuz it is such a [ __ ] hard ride. that all of us in our own journeys have. to ride. But when you start to kind of. re-shift that mentality, it doesn't. happen overnight, but at some point. you're like am I going to just keep. getting [ __ ] knocked down and be like. this is so depressing. This person did. this to me. I hate that. Or you can. actually change your entire life if you. just reframe the way you look at things.

>> And it is a lot easier said than done. Uh my advice would be to feel it. Like [ __ ] is still [ __ ] You could put. perfume on it. You could put a bow on. it. You could put sprinkles on it, bedazzle it. It's still [ __ ] Let the. [ __ ] be [ __ ] It's a shitty situation. Like, give yourself permission to feel. it. Because once you can allow yourself. Emotions are energy in motion. >> I am so sorry. >> through you. >> Let the [ __ ] be the [ __ ].

>> Let the [ __ ] be [ __ ]. And remember you're always deep down. inside you are that [ __ ] Like, you. really are. And she's just got to like. We forget. Like, I think we live in such. a hustle culture where it's like we're. like proud to be like, "I'm burnt out.". Like, "Oh my god, I haven't slept.". Like, don't be proud of that, mama. Like, rest, recover, like, prioritize. like your your well-being. Like, these. are things that like, of course, I had. to learn. But like, I I definitely hold.

so much grace for the past versions of. myself that had led me to this version. because I'm just like, "Damn, like, we. really are out here functioning thinking. that like it's just going to move on.". And it's like, "This too shall pass" is. something that I've lived by, um, for sure. But I think that you know, life will keep meeting you with the same. lessons until you actually listen and. learn it. And you you can think, "Oh, you know, different job or different.

person or different environment." Like, I move my life across the world. You. will continue to attract the same things. if you don't level up your frequency and. nurture yourself and put yourself first. >> Girl. >> Yeah. >> We all needed that. >> Yeah. >> Daddy gang, we are so so so so back. It's the moment. It is really truly the. moment we've all been waiting for. Spring is finally here. Thank you, God.

The UV is getting high enough to tan. The outdoor concerts are lining back up. and suddenly the group chat that went. completely silent all winter. Yes, it's. popping off again, but none of that. would be complete without a White Claw. Okay, when the weather warms up, I am. running to the store and grabbing some. White Claws. Their new blood orange. flavor has become my go-to. It comes in. a variety pack and so everyone gets. their favorite. I've already been. stocking up to have my friends over for. a little pool day. There's just really.

nothing better than catching up as we. lay out together. And yes, Bruce and. Henry obviously get their own sunbed. over there. The temperature in LA was. literally almost 90 last weekend, which. usually I personally would have hated, but I was actually so happy to be. sitting in the pool sipping a crispy. crispy White Claw and pretending I was. back on last summer's Euro trip. Whether. it's barbecues, brunches, or just girls. night by the fire, I think we're all. ready to make up for all the time we. lost stuck inside this winter. Grab a.

pack from your local spot and grab life. by the claw this spring. Please drink. responsibly. Hard seltzer with flavors. White Claw seltzer works, Chicago, Illinois. I want to also talk about how that kind. of becomes inapplicable to the industry. you're in with regard to women. Um it's. no secret that the world is set up to. make us feel like there's only space for. one woman in the room. And I think in. your specific situation, the media.

constantly tries to pit you and other. artists against each other. How have you. navigated this throughout your career? >> I think we are realizing that I always. say juntas somos más, together we are so. much more. And I've been blessed that in. my career, I've been able to lead with. that mentality. And there were. situations growing up in this industry, whether it was on in the English market. or in the Spanish market, when that. which now I'm just like, I'm Spanglish. speaking. I. I know English, no Spanish. I just am.

who I am. But um specifically in the. earlier years where it was very. separate, that programming was still the same, like deeply rooted in the media and in. the industry systems. And it was interesting going into like. Spanish music because it was the most. empowered I ever felt as a young woman. in my artistry, but it was the most macho world that I. could be involved in. And there was very few of us at the.

time, and it was like an iconic like few. of us, you know, that were doing it like. on in the in the mainstream way. And I. look back at it and it's like the fact. that radio. or playlisting. had the audacity to be like, "We can only have one female in. rotation." And I'm like, "So, you're. going to say that to me, Karol G, Natti. Natasha, Anitta?" Like. who are all global superstars in their. own right today, but was Karol G from.

Colombia, Anitta from Brazil, you know, Becky G coming from LA, Natti Natasha. coming from, you know, the Dominican. Republic. Like. that's what we're that's what we were. dealing with. We were dealing with being. on, you know, radio show um. radio shows, like festivals and stuff, and you know, you're toe-to-toe, like it. was so cool to be a part I I to me my. experience in it was really great. because there was a lot of synergy with. where we wanted to come together, but um. you know, we're toe-to-toe with our boys.

like on the charts, and we're like, "Haha, you know, we're all gang gang and. hanging out." And they're just as. supportive of us, but we're looking at. their shows like, "Well, they've got 20. dancers and crazy scaffolding and. amazing lighting programming." And. I'm here with four dancers and my DJ. who's my cousin who's been with me since. day one, and we are very limited because. what we're getting compared to what our. male counterparts are getting, looks. very different. And instead of being.

like, "Why don't we get what what they. get?" It was like, "All right, we're. going to work together. So, we're going. to get the same makeup artist. I'm going. to get the early shift, you'll get the. later shift, or swap swapskis on the. next show, and I'll get her flights, and. you book her hotel, and then you know. Angie, right? Angie Angie was our girl. Angie She's that girl. Love her. Shout out Angie Mar. So, Angie would come with us and she. would glam it all the girls, and we'd. all be like pitching in, and it'd be. like we all look amazing. We all have.

the beat that we wanted. We all have. like the the styling and the everything. because we were working together behind. the scenes, and I don't think people. really know that that that type of like. teamwork was already being practiced. backstage, and it was this like iron sharpens iron. Like it's not personal. It's not me. versus you. It's us versus the system. And. damn, it was so powerful. Like we made. history together. All the female. collaborations that I've ever put. together have done incredible things,

like history-making numbers, and that. make brings me so much pride because. it's so much more than a hit song. Like. hit songs happen every single [ __ ]. day. I saw something bigger. The amount of. times somebody would tell me, "If you. think it's such a hit, why would you. share it with somebody else? Like why. why do you want to do this with them?". And. because it's them. And I'm me, and us together is we, which. is massive. Like I needed to see that as.

a little girl. So, I don't know. I guess for me, it's not. really like, "How do we prove to other. people that we're deserving and worthy?". No, we know we're deserving, we know. we're worthy. Y'all better catch up or. get out the way. >> And how incredible because no, I I don't. think a lot of us knew that story. I. think it's pretty, again, rare because. the system is set up for women to feel. so competitive with each other. The fact. that you four women looked to each other. and you were like.

let's all go in on this together to. basically support, help, further all of. our careers. That is such a testament to. an exact example of how we actually can. all further push a bunch of us up the. hill instead of one person being. a person. >> you know, I I do think. that it's unfortunate that we are still. having the one seat at the table. conversation, but like look around, other tables are being built and you can. build your own and it doesn't have to be.

what it was. It can be something new. Going back to like that radical change. in your mind, like it you can change. your mind, you know, you can. You have. the power to do so. >> Can we talk about your new music? >> Yes. >> You have a new single Marathon and you. look so good in this music video. I was. mesmerized. I'm like. >> Wait, really? Wait, what did you think? I need to know. >> It's so good like I was literally this. is me. I'm sitting at my kitchen table. when I was watching and I was literally. like this.

The outfits, the glam, the styling, the. dancers, the whole thing. I'm like. you're you're amazing, you're incredible. and you're so talented, but like what. can you tell us about it? Like how did. this come together? How did this song. come together? What does it mean to you? >> It was just like this divine alignment. I don't know how I would explain it. other than that. Like it was just this. like taking my power back and when I did. Marathon, I was like. this just really encompasses exactly.

where I am, exactly where I am and. exactly where my audience is because the. alignment of what's happening with. Shower and Marathon like a decade and. plus and I have, you know, the comment. section saying this is my middle school. song and my favorite my freshman year. this is my favorite. I was like, "Technically, mine too. We all grew up. together. We all have been out here. pushing forward, like doing what we do, doing the best that we can, and the fact. that there's this. synergy of just like, and we're going to. keep going, it's just I don't know. It.

it it feels so special. >> Well, and it is such it's such a good. song where you're like I like want to. like get ready to this when I'm going. out with my girlfriends. I want to. listen to this when I'm alone in the car. and I need a little like confidence. Like it has all of those things. that you want in a song, but it it's. also so. clearly your style. Like it's it's just. so right, and I'm so happy for you. Like. it's such an it's it's really. incredible. Like I'm obsessed. >> much. That makes me so happy.

>> What went into the writing process? >> Yeah, so I would say the whole process. from like beginning to end, including. like music video, and even like playing. it for fans before its actual release, was like so interesting. and how like there was just a lot of. things that were just like, "Oh, this is. meant to be. Oh, this is meant to be.". >> Can you feel it when you have a song. where you're like. >> I really do think I know this there has. been moments where I'm like, you know, I. don't think you really know. Like you. don't really know what's going to. happen. I There have been moments where.

I'm like, "Ooh, this feels so good. This feels so. right. I don't even really care what. happens after this. It's just so right. Like this is just Oh, it feels great.". Um and to get to that in my artistry at. this phase of my career, having been. through so much, it's like so beautiful and such a. blessing to be able to feel that and. know that that's possible. Um but from beginning to finish, it was. like it was just a good time. Like. everything that I've made in this season. is like even if we're crying,

we're crying in the club, girl. Like we. are, you know, like it's a vibe. It's. it's meant to bring joy, and that was. important to me because everything that. is happening right now like around us is. not like there is not giving joy. Like. it's not It's not giving joy. It's been. giving pressure. It's been giving hate. It's been giving so much negativity. And. to be in a position of privilege as an. artist earned privilege to get into a.

space where I feel safe enough to lean. into my individuality, my empowerment, my like just this liberation. I was. like, I need to put this into a song so. that I can microdose it to my fans so. that if they are going through something. like they listen to the song they know. they could shake their ass and they. deserve to shake their ass. Like they. deserve this moment right now for. themselves. >> It's so good. And Marathon is like. that's like I you got to have the hype. girl. You got to be your own biggest. hype girl. >> Before we go, in your documentary you. said Becky G came to save Rebecca. What.

relationship do you feel like Becky G. and Rebecca have today? >> Oh man. I did say that, huh? I would say that. like I've I've been blessed to. collaborate with so many amazing artists. in in my career, but I feel like this is. my greatest collaboration yet. Me with. myself. Yeah. It's been beautiful to know that. like Becky G the boss, the person who.

says it how it is, who goes on stage and. doesn't second-guess herself. She's very. much real. And Rebecca who is this more. vulnerable, more passionate, um more intimate, more sensual side of. myself is also a star in what I've been. doing lately. So it's just like yeah, I'd say they're like the best. collaborators now. Yeah. >> I think it is such a beautiful message. to anyone watching of like your. circumstances growing up don't need to.

define you, but you can use them as your. greatest strength. And now the fact that. you make music for people and like even. you saying like I do this for my fans. I. want them if you're having a bad day, you can listen to my music. Like you're. still doing what you did at a young age, but now in the capacity like you said. where it is like genuinely something you. want to do. You don't have to do it. And. that's incredible. And I just Yeah. I'm a fan. I'm I'm truly like so. inspired by you and like I can't thank. you enough for your time and for sharing. so much about your life today.

>> No, I can I can say the same. The. feeling is absolutely mutual. It's It's. funny. One thing I did think about. before coming into this is what I admire. most about you is that you really are. a facilitator for a safe space. And so. when it comes to like, you know, we want. to keep things light as a feather today. Like let's just talk about the fit, girl. Like let's just talk about your. outfit. That's totally fine. And if we. want to go as deep as the ocean, like. I'm right here with you. Let's talk. therapy. Let's go there. And I think. that that.

that is something that obviously for. someone in in my position is is just. such a blessing because ultimately. anybody who's listening to this like. we're all just human beings. We're all. looking for quality connection in life. And there is no difference between me, you, and whoever the hell's listening to. this in their car, at home, with their. homegirls, or all alone. Like we're just. we deserve. Yeah, we deserve that. >> No, this is the girl talk we needed. Becky G, thank you so much for coming on. Call Her Daddy.

>> Thank you so much. >> [music]. [music].