Amy Schumer: Pro Athletes, Porn & Pretending to C*m (Full Episode)
[Music]. what is up daddy gang it is your. Founding Father Alex Cooper with call. her. daddy Amy Schumer welcome to call her. Daddy thank you so very much Alex Cooper. I am so happy we're finally meeting me. too no I need to tell you I was saying. this this morning to my friends I said. okay have you ever sent a DM and forgot. you sent it and then they respond and. you're like wait what did I send that. was me to you so I for context to.
everyone listening I sent Amy a DM in. 2021 I don't even remember who I was at. that point in my life okay you were not. yet born was not born and I sent her. basically saying like you got to come on. the show like I love you blah blah blah. three and a half years later I see you. saying like oh my gosh just saw this and. it was just in the preview so I'm like. what the [ __ ] did I say like I'm like. what did I say to this woman like were. you drunk no literally like I'm like. hammered or high and I'm like Amy and. thank God you were like sweet and nice.
and you're like okay I'll like see you. soon God well just so you know both. Megan the stallion and Britney Spears. has one of those Shady DMS for me. sitting in their inbox so I know the. feeling and never has it been read never. have they been read but I you know I was. so happy to see that what is your angle. with Megan the stallion what are you. trying to get in there for I don't. remember no that's the thing you send. them you know you're like you know you. feel connected to someone and actually I. have met her I'd met her at uh like I.
think an Oscar thing okay and um when we. both won Oscars I don't know if you in. your research came but I won an Oscar. and so did Megan maybe and uh so I think. I just wanted to be like should we have. a friendship you know and she you know. in return has you know not followed me. so I respect I think she's smart I think. that's a smart move I'm obsessed and. then we'll leave the Britney one to the. imagination no Britney has it but she. mentioned me in her. book and God damn that felt amazing.
street cred street. [Music]. cred I need to tell you one more story. before I start asking you questions so. just to get this off my chest okay um. I'm not a freak like I'm not a freak fan. but I do love you oh my God that's so. nice I love you too but if I were to.
have one note yeah this mic is real. heavy oh my god do you do you ever think. like no I don't care look I'm a standup. like I hold a mic just roast me but this. is like an actual weight no like I mean. I want to support the brand obviously. I'm I'm honored to be on this show. you're you're you're a a a you know a. sultan um but this is a heavy microphone. you're exhausted yes the thing is is I. and I swim but I'm like this is 20 lb.
can I just clear my name for a second I. always have mic stands always you are. the exception cuz I'm like I'm sweating. and my hand sweating but it's fine and. I'm honored it's only because this is. not my normal Studio we didn't know. where to put the mic stand and I didn't. want it to cover your face cuz you look. gorgeous I know thank you so you're. going to have to Buck up okay and you're. going to have to do a little weight. training today okay so shut the [ __ ] up. okay let me engage my core and move on. now let me tell you like a Loving Story.
while you engag the core yes it was the. year that train wreck came out and I. live in Boston I'm in college and I am. literally at like what feels like the. end of the road I am so [ __ ]. miserable I'm at the worst place in my. life what feels like it because like a. boy was breaking up with me and I was. miserable my mom flies to Boston and. it's like I have to cheer you up it's. getting really scary over there and it. is like a random Tuesday and we go to. the movie theater and I'm walking around. cuz my mom's like we got to just see a. movie and I'm like train wreck like me. like let's just see it like here we go I.
walk in I sob the entire movie and then. when I leave I'm like oh I'm a new. [ __ ] [ __ ] like I'm going to reverse. the roles on the men [ __ ] this [ __ ]. let's [ __ ] go and that movie I know. it sounds corny but like you didn't know. me at that point but it literally. changed my mindset in that moment and it. helped me through like a really tough. time no stop no I'm really tearing it. might be because the mic is so heavy but. I really it's not that deep that's a. dream for someone to say that to me and. for you to say that to me I no I know. it's like it's hard to give a compliment.
and it's hard to take a compliment but. I'm taking it right right in right now. this is close to the Britney mentioning. me in the book and I'm not I'm not. [ __ ] with you I am honored that of. course no so I'm a huge fan so thank you. for being here D off this for quite a. while it's good it's good um okay I'm. going to ask you a bunch of just random. questions to get us started are you. ready okay okay okay I'm ready ready. okay I'm ready whatever comes to your. mind you're just going to answer ready. okay how would your friends describe you. in three words look.
psychotic funny love yeah what is your. comfort movie The Birds Alfred Hitchcock. oh I know so hack right but I mean you. know everybody's a couple Comfort movies. but for some reason that movie gets you. gets me gets you in your fi and I know. this is going to be like o over when. this comes out but like I'm so crazy. about Wicked right now did you see it I. haven't seen it yet okay everyone's. going to be like Wicked This was year. was this like it'll be kind of pregnant.
all like it's the wicked but no but. obviously kind of pregnant like the. movie everyone's talking about but yeah. it's the year I just needed to get it. off my chest another Oscar coming um. okay what is the craziest fan. interaction you've ever had I guess them. eating me. out what right I mean that's crazy that. would definitely top the chart yeah I. mean okay you know what I'm just going. to get right into this here okay and. I've never said this anywhere okay but. when I was sort of at.
my kind of peak like d touring Arenas. whatever and I'll say it cuz this is. where you say it were they a. professional athlete sure did I text. them like late at night and they came. over went down on me and then I said I'm. so tired I'm so sorry and they left yes. and you know who you. are not the look into the camera and. that's happened a couple times and I'm. not proud of it and I think like you. know and and keep the ambulance is good.
for this moment cuz this is like when I. actually get actually canceled no but. it's all about you know you want to be a. giving lover and whatever whatever but. at this moment it was like you know some. people like will blow a guy and that's. the end of the night so I kind of you. know did it my way to quote Frank. Sinatra first of all hold on mhm a. professional athlete was a fan of yours. why is that so shocking no no sorry no.
why I'm saying. that it's not you know when you're young. and you're in this Spotlight you you. know you you I mean I look I know you. ma'am maam no I'm more saying like was. he at like a fan event no I've never I. don't think I've ever been to a fan. event but he was at a show he was at a. show he was at a show can I ask of all. the sports what sport and then we're. moving on baseball have you had sex with. my ex-boyfriend no and we didn't have. sex oh right bab went down on me and. then I yawned and was like it's been a I. mean that's a moment in train wreck and.
that that's from real real life I love. that so much for you no it's kind of. amazing that's like a full circle moment. I'm I'm appreciating that story right. now that's good for color Daddy thank. you for the tea you're you're welcome. and like that's not you know the most. popular move that gets the best response. but that's the truth I kind of feel like. that would keep them wanting way more I. that I that's happened probably three. times in my in my life when I was in my. hay yeah okay and uh and.
what you know one of them was Furious I. remember and um and one of them was like. totally fine with it and you know what. the baseball player was pretty cool. about it well because I guess like the. Furious makes sense cuz it's like wow. are you saying I'm that bad like you're. falling asleep no I I think it's like I. just made you come and now you kicking. me out and I'm like oh my God what does. it feel like to be a woman you. know and again this mic is so heavy no.
shut up I know but you're young my bones. are old and they're confused s what if. you prop it up on the pillow no okay. okay I'm glad we tried it on who would. be your celebrity Hall. Pass okay okay um I'm gonna say either. Christian Bale or Beyonce the range yeah. but I don't think I would get a hall. pass I would give a hall pass you. wouldn't get but I wouldn't get one no. but it's good to like think about it. like it's I think it's even better when.
it's like a dream and like I don't know. if you'd actually even want to do. it how many can I have you can have as. many as you want okay Method Man can I. get my phone out no um yeah yes yes and. he knows and he knows and he's his. beautiful wife and whatever and he's. like so doesn't is not interested yeah. but why did he say something to you no. well you know now that you say that wait. can I ask who yours is specifically as.
the pirate Johnny Depp like as. interesting as the pirate like I'm. shocked with the you want the makeup I. want the makeup jewelies the hair I want. the little cloak like his little skirt I. want the whole thing yeah yeah yeah got. those Rings what is your most. embarrassing interaction in Hollywood oh. my God so many so many so many so many. um okay this is a long time ago but I. was at an equinox Flex get it and uh.
Alec Baldwin was there this is this is. 25 years ago okay and he was get he was. getting water and I was behind him at. the water fountain and I was like and I. quoted Glen Gary Glenn Ross and I said. water is for closers and I should have. killed myself. instantly I don't remember like I. blacked out because it was so stupid I. don't know if he acknowledged me but I. am sorry did you ever see him again. yes yes he he's been nothing but really.
nice to me did he remember that moment. or no I don't think so he I didn't I. didn't I I didn't I I don't know I don't. know I can't remember anything like do. you do you do drugs yeah like I did but. not anymore okay right good good no no. I've never done cocaine I've never done. ecstasy you've never done cocaine never. cocaine never ecstasy mushrooms and weed. you know I'm not like a mushroom girl. you're not I don't know if I need like. I'm worried it's going to like affect my. brain like in the morning I'm like.
that's smart okay no that's good because. like it has I I'm like I won't remember. what we talked about today you're not. with us anymore no I am no longer with. us but at least you're still funny thank. you um what is the craziest rumor you've. ever heard about yourself um oh God so. many uh like you know there's so much. out there but but about me oh well this. is fun um at my wedding People magazine. reported some celebrities who were there. and they uh said that Jennifer Anison.
was there and she was not there but my. mom who is 75 okay said I think what. happened it was no from behind I look. exactly like Jennifer Aniston and I'm. like you just had knee surgery and. you're in your mid 70s you know but but. and I just said oh okay oh mom so that. was yeah that tells me a lot about your. mom that does tell you a lot about my. mom.
yeah we love your mom mom I love a. little delug h i mean I've got it. obviously I am so confused yeah this is. good um okay what is what is one of your. biggest pet peeves okay this is this is. really controversial oh sitting why are. you looking away from me because I I'm. I'm I'm already regretting saying it. just go and it's not really even a thing. okay it's not even a pet peeve um my pet. peeve is. men but.
also but also um and I already said men. right yeah you said okay I said men my. other my other this is kind of like a. fun little not really okay okay I have a. couple now that I'm going pickle ball. annoys me have you ever played no me. either I'm just hating from a distance. so loud and if you can Vape while you're. playing the sport is it a sport and I I. don't like how a lot of people and I. don't know if you do this so I'm so.
sorry just hit me okay the way that I. think. especially people I don't know both. coasts say it have turned the word end. into like a 10 syllable word. like and I'm. like what okay I definitely don't do. that no but do you know you know what I. mean I and yeah and like and let's keep. it [ __ ] right but and it starts e. they go.
and who the [ __ ] are you hanging out. with no you're going to notice it now. you're going to notice it now I don't. think I've ever noticed that you're. going to listen back to thing um so we. were at the store and oh I know what. you're talking about you know what I'm. saying when you put it in the context of. that done okay I also agree with all of. those things and you haven't insulted me. yet so this is good which I'm fine if. you roast me at some point in this. interview don't hold back but I hate. pickle ball too actually I've never. played it so I can't say that I've never. played it either that doesn't mean we. can't hate. yeah okay that doesn't mean right just.
play tennis everyone's just so smug and. they've got their Racket and they're. like and they look so happy maybe that's. what it is maybe it's just the joy that. they're feeling and I'll and I'll never. feel that Joy so I mean I guess that's. what it's really about if you play let. me know and I'll like go for the first. time with you okay great no but I'll. like terar a meniscus or something and I. like I just like when people are like. you just hear these people like I got a. pickle ball injury and you're like. that's it loser absolutely get on a boat.
and leave and guess who plays pickle. ball who my. mom Jennifer. Aniston Jennifer Anison plays pickle. ball Jennifer andison you heard it here. first what is the greatest length you've. gone to get out of plans oh this is fun. this is fun so my dad is Ms he's in a. wheelchair okay um what was the question. no I'm just kidding no I'm just kidding. so but I love that you're you're such a. good interviewer may I give a compliment. oh sure of course you're a great.
interviewer oh my God we haven't even. gotten into it yet bed on today not. based on today. um uh wait let me just get some of the. hand sweat um no but wait what was I. okay so my dad your dad so my dad so I. was starting to date this comedian okay. I don't know if he still does comedy but. this is you know 20 years ago okay and. we were supposed to work a weekend. together at this club like in the middle. of nowhere and I was like and the way he.
like kissed me like he like it was like. soap opera like he like had a real. moment with me you know like slow and I. was like I want to go home and so I. pretended like I didn't feel well and. then in the morning I texted my mom at. like 5:00 a.m. and I was like in an hour. call me and tell me that dad's in the. hospital and so I'm laying next to this. guy and so my. mom who is a real gangster calls me goes. your dad's in the hospit hospital and. the guy's still sleeping and I'm trying.
to cry like I'm like oh my God what you. know I have to leave on a plane you know. so I think that's the biggest lie no no. no okay do you ever feel guilty about. like doing a lie when it has to do with. actual illness like I think I like lied. a couple times about my grandma dying. and I like they're like again again I. was one of those people for a while but. it was to like each different man so I. was like this isn't like making Headway. like it's to different people but then I. started to be like oh [ __ ] like. someone's going to die cuz I keep saying.
someone's [ __ ] dying I know but. whatever um yeah but no my dad lives on. he will not die okay he's us no he is. very much with us but he did tell me the. other day that he what he wants done. with his ashes oh and um I don't. remember I need to write it down you. know but this looks like a nice place is. that an earn no no no but what he said. was I just want to be with you and I'm. like I don't think I can commit to. Eternity with my dad right now you know.
yeah I think that's like a little much. yeah like I don't know I want to see. what my sister's up to like I want to. see what everybody else is like your. husband yeah like what I'm just going to. be with my dad forever like me and my. dad like that's it yeah I think you can. kind of do one of those where you're. like absolutely and you look him in the. eye and then once he's gone flush his. ashes right into the. sea yes no I'll put him somewhere nice. do you think the people that wear like. ashes like around their neck are a. little um um or do you do that I don't.
wear jewelry at all cuz it like I just. feel weird it looks weird on me what I. don't know it just looks weird on me. yeah I'm nothing yeah did you say I'm. nothing I'm nothing I have no I'm not. Beed anywhere not even an earring no I. let my holes close including my vagina. gone but the [ __ ] ready to go really. ready um okay okay we're currently in. Brooklyn in a random person's house I.
like literally have no idea where we are. yeah so they'll come in at any moment. and kick us out but until then what. would you say is the most New York. Quality about you I think that. I uh like don't give a [ __ ] and that. like just in terms of like on the subway. or whatever I'll be like move in you. know like this thing that like if it's. just just in you and it's like I should. be like trying to keep a low Pro but you. know I just I can't and I'll just get. you know involved in anything that goes.
on and that's what's nice about New York. is like that especially public. transportation everybody's like together. and the community aspects yeah yeah but. yeah wait does anyone ever be be like. [ __ ] you Amy Schumer like get the [ __ ]. off like what yeah no I mean yes but no. like you know no no not really I feel. like I'm like Anonymous here in New York. like no one cares and they're expecting. to see you and they're almost like mad. that it's they're like this this is the. famous person we're running into you.
know can we get Rihanna what the [ __ ]. true they expect to see me they're like. where were you we went to the 30 Rock. today yeah um okay you grew up in the. city but you were born in Long Island no. I was born in the city and then I grew. up on Long Island okay yeah that. backward sorry um how would you have. described yourself as a kid I would. say I'm I think I'm exactly the same uh. what what what is what am I now um I. would say like my friends loyal.
psychotic and funny you were always. psychotic I was always psychotic I was. always just trying to make myself laugh. oh that's nice you know like have a good. time I mean and I would want to make my. friends laugh and other people but it. was really about I think just trying to. you know combat boredom and just like. have fun completely yeah entertain. myself I need to picture you like in. school like Lil Amy Lil Amy was voted. the class clown classic and teachers. worst nightmare uh but I.
was I played volleyball okay so I was. pretty serious about volleyball so I. wasn't like doing theater but I did. start plays when I was five but then I I. got real into volleyball and you're. soccer right I you did your research. don't you like when someone's like I. guess I looked at Wikipedia and feels. like a hero weit did you want to be like. an actress growing up or did you want to. be like a pro volley well I was like. actress but I got really into volleyball. and then I had a bad surfing accident oh. and so I was taken out for the season.
and I I I don't know if I could have. played D1 but I was definitely going to. play in college going somewhere. somewhere but I couldn't you couldn't. play volleyball and do the plays so then. you leaned into theater majored in. theater okay what was the most unhinged. thing you did at school like you're the. class com like you're [ __ ] [ __ ] up oh. God I mean I ran for um I believe I ran. for president of student council as a. freshman that'll that'll that'll put a. Target on your back. just to make a speech and but I I could.
be getting it wrong it might have been. junior high but I I believe it was I. believe it was I believe it was high. school and I just I made a speech and it. was all lies I talked about growing up. on a farm in Iowa I would you know if. there was a big sale I would bring in a. ton of toast you know and like have a. sign like toast like I just was an idiot. and just like thought I was so funny. weit that the confidence it takes if it. was freshman year to go for president. and seniors are at you like you [ __ ].
piece of [ __ ] back up like where did you. get Confidence from like that I know I. don't know I really think my parents. lied to me so much and I just believed. it and then when I found out they were. lying it was too late and I had this. like inner confidence and it was just. too late it couldn't be shaken it. couldn't wait are either of your parents. funny yeah my dad they're both funny my. dad's really funny my mom is like is. funny too in a good way I say that in a. good way yeah yeah yeah no they're.
they're both really funny he's he's. hilarious how would you have described. your social life so you're funny like. did people like the funny kid or were. you like alienated no friends I was. cool sorry no I was I was cool I like. things weren't like easy I had major. trauma and stuff when I was like 12 you. know which I'm totally happy to talk. about but yeah yeah yeah cuz I know your. life kind of flipped upside down at. around like 10 yeah yeah my dad D got Ms. and we went bankrupt like we had money.
we were comfortable and then we were. like. poor and my parents got a divorce and my. mom started dating my friend's father. like it was a whole. Nightmare and. I you know I I. really I I really was traumatized and. didn't think I was traumatized you know. of course and then it was really hard. but I still had a boyfriend I was still.
like making jokes and you know going out. and popular and that kind of [ __ ] to go. from like being comfortable to then all. of a sudden having your parents go. bankrupt do you remember that. conversation like how did you find out. cuz usually that's an overnight thing. right where everyone's like um it was. overnight from what I remember it was. like um it I mean we went from like. living. in what I would consider like a mansion. you know by Real Housewives standards.
not not decorated well or anything but a. big house with a pool and whatever to a. like you know maybe. two-bedroom tiny home or like we moved. every year and we lived we would live in. someone's basement or someone's attic. and that kind of stuff and what happened. like did well it was like I really feel. like that part of it was all good and so. you know I can make fun of my mom and. whatever but I never you know I had I.
always had. like this sounds bad but I was going to. say we always like had somewhere to live. we always had food I was never like. embarrassed of my outfit and like you. know because also my friends didn't have. any money which was nice like none of us. were dressed well none of us had a nice. car or a car you know it was so there. was no like class distinction or. anything and I was just like you know. wanted I I just my mom says that I was.
embarrassed of our new house like that I. asked the school bus like I I I don't. know something where I was like can you. drop me off somewhere else um I don't. remember that but I don't remember the. loss of money being anything that I. really felt just like the relocation. yeah do you remember how it was. explained to you like how your parents. lost all the money I don't remember that. I think it's just it's you know it like. trying to the revisionist history that. each of my parents give like I really.
can't tell what's true of course you. know that is like so disorienting when. you become an adult because you're. like which one of you is a compulsive. liar and am I going to do that to my. children one day yeah and like are we. all just completely remembering things. in the way that allowed us to just move. on well it's yeah you're right it's it's. it's really disorienting and and. destabilizing cuz you're just like is. any of what I was told true I don't at. all know I don't I don't feel like I.
know. anything about where about my actual. past can I ask you because I know you. mentioned it earlier like the your mom. sounds amazing don't you love know the. preface don't you love when like live. for her she's the greatest. Jennifer I will say it's so funny having. like public platforms because my parents. are always like we love how you just. like talk about us and I'm like well. it's my [ __ ] life sorry um I love the. no socks wait did you wear no socks with.
those shoes yeah well I live really. close to here and then I'll just like go. home and like you know and I wanted to. show off my no my my feet are really a. bummer right now wa you don't wear socks. with shoes no I usually do I usually do. what happened this morning I just um I. mean I just like came over here it took. 13 minutes in a car you know so you so. nocks do you do that often if it's like. I'm just going to be out for a little. bit Yeah well how does that strike you.
like is that are you like your feet are. cold or one feet is a nude foot like do. you not even have nail polish on there. no look at my nails okay look at my look. at like your hand your hand is shaking. my hand is shaking she toally exhausted. you guys from holding the mic I'm. panting back to your mother oh yeah. sorry so your mom had an affair with. your best friend's dad right how was. that told to you it was told to me like.
um we're in love I'm for the first time. in love with. someone um i' I realize I've never been. in love. before and. um and and I was like conditioned to be. like well I'm so happy for you go girl. you deserve happiness I love you so much. like you know just kind of you know. brainwashed to work ship your parent.
your mom and um and vilify my dad and so. I was just kind of like I got you you. know did you stay friends with that. friend we tried but no did they end up. like living together ever like your mom. and the guy like did it ever go viral. they they were viral they were together. I think for like two months oh oh quick. yeah like almost destroy like a family. and then like. you know I met someone new and like and.
now I really know what love is like 10. times God bless her love she is so. self-aware and we are in a good place. love but yeah and you know what and I I. really like judged her when I when I was. 30 cuz I kept crazy journals I read back. from you know from 12 to 21 I kept these. journals and I'm like oh my God this. woman you know and then. but now that I'm a mom and I'm around.
the age she was I'm like look you don't. know I know okay like there's a lot of. [ __ ] up [ __ ] that goes on yeah she. kept a roof over our heads I don't know. that's true I also feel like when you. get to that age like again like they're. you're told such different things. because you don't know really what's. going on behind the scenes and your mom. and your dad's relationship and all. these things and now that you're like. married and you have a child you're like. oh I'm seeing it a little bit more. clearly not that you would do that but. it puts unless one of my son's like.
friends has a dad that's like at all. even a little. interested then we're [ __ ] popping. over let's go are you someone that. typically handles bad news well like do. you like black out are you people. pleasing are you like I handle it I. handle it well I I I handle like kind of. emergencies and that kind of stuff like. I stay very chill just know that. everything you're asking me in my mind. I'm like and you and you you're not. asking me a [ __ ] question today this. you we only got a certain amount of time. like we are focused on Amy is someone.
coming in here after me no oh my God I. only do one basically like a week I got. to be I got to be lubed up for you I got. to get my beauty rest for you you're not. like on the casting couch and we're not. rotating this [ __ ] it's you and only did. you look up my favorite porn. yeah now I feel attacked that's your. favorite porn no no but I had a phase. with it sure oh you did yeah sure what. your favorite porn uh well the thing is.
and I was hoping this would come up yeah. I figured. um I I I feel like I can't say it. because you know a lot of porn is like. from real life situations like go arai. and then and then I'm getting a massage. or I'm in a car or I'm whatever and I. don't want like the driver or the you. know I don't want them you know you have. to live your real. life um so you know I'll tell you later. okay yeah you don't want anyone to get. the right idea is podcast porn thing. they should make that where it's like. you're like B and then all of a sudden.
I'm like Amy give me that foot give me. your bare fooot start massaging your. foot mid interview daddy gang let's talk. about dating okay I know I am married. but don't get it twisted so many of my. friends are still single and they come. to me and they're like Alex what should. I be doing and I'm like get on Tinder I. know that you guys can vet people before. you go on dates with them then all of a. sudden you're not wasting Friday night. you're having the best time on a Friday.
night with this date Tinder cares about. every step of your dating journey and it. has plenty of unique safety features. like are you sure which Vibe checks any. messages that seem a bit risky and helps. keep message threads a safer place to. start a conversation share my date lets. your friends know about your plans and. noonlight discreetly connects you with. help if you need it I want all of you. going on dates daddy gang and having so. much fun and Tinder has because you're. back you are actually going to be able.
to be present and focus on your date. because of all these safety features put. in place so explore all the. possibilities for yourself it starts. with a swipe download Tinder. today you are one of the most successful. women obviously in comedy when were you. like I'm turning this [ __ ] into a. [ __ ] career let's go right I well I. didn't start Santa until after college I. was. 23 um. and I did not even think about the. possibility of making a living from it.
but the first. time I got a college gig and they were. like we're paying you $800 for one hour. and I ran oh my God around my apartment. do like laps around my apartment like. it's like the best feeling I've ever. felt I was like will will I feel this. good if I ever have a baby um and. someone who's had a baby no okay and I. was like oh my God for an hour $800 it. was a gig it was so far Upstate college.
is pay well and it was so far Upstate. New York that it was like you flew into. Canada and just no one else wanted to do. it so I got it and uh yeah and then I. was like oh my God if I can just make a. living doing this that's all I want but. then you know you you start you get. there and you go what's next what's next. what's next and. so yeah and then like you know I really. want to try and make a lot of money we. after the roast of Charlie Sheen I like. that was like your obviously like a huge.
moment that was big on your Wikipedia at. least that's what it reads um how often. bar Walters is. back Babs is. here I'm [ __ ] dead um how often are. you using your roasting skills like are. you someone like [ __ ] roasting your. friends yeah like my yeah your best. friends like that's all you do we just. trash each other the whole time um. but yeah my my friends yeah but really.
like I wouldn't do that to an audience. again I wouldn't do a roast again why I. just was young and like didn't realize. that people's feelings really get hurt o. you know I mean that's so that sounds so. stupid but it was like you know and. especially when you're starting out you. just think okay these people are so. famous I'm a completely unknown comedian. who cares what I say but then you know. like oh that probably really did hurt. that person's feelings or something you. think well I know it hurts people's. feelings but I also feel like there's.
been like a random rise again and like. the Netflix specials are roast and. people are roasting and people are like. liking it like obviously we saw Nicki. Glazer had like a huge moment because. people were like oh my God like keep. [ __ ] roasting my God she killed no I. love watching roasts and they're so. funny I just don't like I couldn't do it. because you too hard I no I absolutely. go for like the jugular bring a gun to a. knife fight but also um I don't know. like I just feel and with the audience I. wouldn't you know I used to be like if.
you're going to like Heckle me or. something like you're going to be handed. your ass and and now I'm like it's just. better to diffuse it yeah and and you. know I think just from therapy and maybe. becoming a mom you're like I kind of. want like peace yeah like I I don't I. will not feel better if I hurt you but. you're good at it good to know it's in. Your Arsenal but but hold on with my. husband if we're talking [ __ ] about. other people like you know you every. night the worst people in the whole. world I wish I could like be a fly on.
the wall oh disgusting human beings. isn't it the best where you're like no I. am a good person but the [ __ ] I say with. my husband oh God it's so yeah I mean. that's I think that's why we I think. that's why we click so much it's just. the evil working beneath obviously. comedy is like such a male-dominated. industry not to get too [ __ ] deep. here well whatever they're all male. dominated Industries every single one. yeah we we're talking about comedy today. but any other industry that you pick up. yes it is male dominated at all times.
but yours happens to be comedy so we're. going to talk about the men in that. industry um did you ever have an. experience like that was so obvious to. you where you were like wow I'm. literally not being taken as seriously. because I don't have a dick I would say. only every single day all day every. moment of every single day every day. yeah all day wow yeah okay yes yes it's. so sad mhm it is sad and I would love to.
say something different but the the only. thing to do. is be in the highest position of power. and call the shots because the. second you're in somebody. else's you know. um I was almost going to say Ballroom. I'm like I don't I don't know why are. you in a ballroom but it's just if. you're not at the and even when you are. yeah at the top the food chain it's.
still dude it's crazy it's it's there's. no relief and. and um I I've and any woman that you. think might have it different does not. at all and at no point ever yeah what's. there's like some glorious dyum quote I. love her yeah it's like any woman who'd. like I'm going to butcher it but like. who decides to you know live an. interesting life or will be treated as a. cruel joke and she'll need her.
Sisterhood and and I'm sorry cuz I. butchered it but no no the concept I get. it and I wish it wasn't like that and I. God damn I wish it wasn't like that no. it is like it's I appreciate you saying. that as sad as it is you're like every. day every waking minute of my [ __ ]. life like I want one time a a promoter. but I'm like no every second of every. day every set every everything and how. sad that like we are in these privileged. position. and I'm like wow I'm a privileged and.
iing feel it all the time like you. everyone just thinks that women at at. any point might lose it and they're just. waiting for you and so every day it's. like momento you have to like start over. uh and and remind everyone that you're. in your position for a reason every day. every day and I just want to say this. since you asked. every year you're in like a a chain like.
a a WhatsApp chat or a text chain with. the other moms in class I mean with with. the other parents okay and then they. pick they designate class moms you know. they go like and they and they haven't. changed it to bpc they haven't made it. to class parents okay it's class Mom. it's class moms cuz the moms are the. ones handling [ __ ] and communicating and. we text whatever and then once in a. while like a dad will pop in there and.
we'll be like Rick are you lost you know. like the moms are we're like getting. things done right and and I just like. think like I want people at home to. imagine like imagine if your dad one. year was in charge of planning your. birthday party I wouldn't have had one. no okay your dad is like I'm going to. handle it this year okay any dad is like. I got. it and or or anything or planned. anything they like communicate they.
can't and I think this is and and men. are in charge of the world it's. terrifying the world and that's why. we're in so many wars I think that it's. not even on purpose I think probably. these men were probably just trying to. plan a birthday party. no right someone quote that that's going. to be like on the internet like no like. no you're right I'm saying no it's so. true and it's really I appreciate you. saying this because I was going to ask. you that today because obviously like.
the state of our world we don't need to. get into it because it's like we would. be here for 19 hours and we would start. crying literally kill ourselves we have. a suicide but I think especially as. women it's interesting because I've had. people ask me like advice and in some. capacity I try as [ __ ] hard as I can. but I'm also like like I mentioned. earlier we're privilege and on top of. that like it literally hasn't gotten. that much better if anything it's like. people do it like sneakier around me but. I'm still experienced like misogynistic.
[ __ ] that are like essentially. criticizing me for XYZ um or saying. stuff about like oh if she if she ever. talked about sex then she's just like. forever a [ __ ] like I feel like at one. point people really tried to pinu as. just like a sex comic every every woman. is like a whr what woman is what woman. like Steps out of into the spotlight and. is not just like you're a [ __ ] [ __ ]. and you're a [ __ ] it's just the level. of horiness but why do you think men are. so frustrated when women talk about sex.
I think they're afraid of women and. they're. afraid I I I really do I think I think I. think men are terrified of women I think. they're it goes back to how they feel. about their moms I think they feel. guilty about their mom I mean we all. feel guilty about our moms yeah. and and just scared and everything we've. ever seen all the movies all the books. all the you know it's like it's all from.
the guy's point of view it's all the. male gaze the slow pan up from her heel. it's and it's just starting to get. better and so if I were to say to Gloria. Stein I'm like what the hell she'd be. like it's so much better than it was but. what it was was that not that long ago. you needed you know your husband to get. a credit card and we couldn't vote we. couldn't vote and like you know here we. are and here we are and here we are. losing rights by the day um in your. dating life did did you ever feel like. because you were in the beginning so.
open about talking about sex did you. ever feel like guys had specific. expectations of you if you were going to. hook up with them because of how open. you were about bedroom stuff that's a. good question I don't think they did I I. think they could tell I was full of [ __ ]. you know in I remember in college I. would kind of try to talk a big game and. be like really confident like you know. may West or maybe a more up-to-date. reference and then we would like I would. go home with them I remember I went home.
with this guy one time and he had like I. don't know like pitbulls or do and pinch. I don't know he had these like dogs and. he was like just I think he had like an. ankle bracelet on you know like he was. on Parole or something and like we were. and we're like kissing and like we're. like in the laundry room of my dorm and. it was like it just all happened so. quick and I was like naked. and and I was like I am in way over my. head I am not this experienced sexually. I have been completely bullshitting this.
guy trying to like act like I know. something and yeah I still but no nobody. ever yeah he he knew I was full of [ __ ]. too he probably just wanted to those are. the worst moments where you're there and. you're like wait I was bluffing I I. don't actually like this like I was like. trying to say a big game and like please. stop like I'm actually super vulnerable. and scared of your. penis. terrified behind closed doors like in. your 20s and 30s how did you like what. was your relationship to your sex and. your body I 20s and.
30s I think like I remember the the. first time when I was a teenager and my. first boyfriend was like fingering me or. something and I was like wet and I was. really embarrassed and I thought it was. a bad thing so I kept going to the. bathroom and like wiping it up you know. I had no idea and uh and then in college. I think I was so drunk all the time like. I I just I feel like myself self-esteem. was super low cuz I went to Talen.
University and like that was like number. one for Playboy for hottest women that. year and are you serious so I was just. like an actual troll with like the. physique of Brian Cox and I was like you. know like I just look like an MMA. fighter and you know I'd have to wait. you know like I would black out and so I. you know I didn't even think about or. like trying to have an orgasm probably. until I was I probably didn't have the. confidence to to try and have the the.
guy make me come until I was like in my. 30s which I think is like probably more. normal than not like I'm telling you. there are so many women that message me. and are like I literally have not I. don't I don't feel anything and I'm like. it's because like half of the time when. you go to have sex for the first time. the guy is enjoying it there no woman is. having an orgasm the first time or. second time they're having sex like you. don't know what you're doing so I think. that's like. thing to say I have never come from.
penetration. ma'am it's a scary thing to say out loud. no it's not I mean it's scary because. nobody talks about it you know because. we're all like you know getting an. oscar but getting an oscar but no I I. you know I've had generous Partners who. understand like that you know I need to. orgasm first and I know you subscribed. to that 100% On Your Wikipedia it says. to make her come is that the third line. or the fifth which one was that again no.
listen I get it like I think in the. early days of my show I used to talk so. openly like over the toop openly that. maybe it made some people uncomfortable. but it was like almost like trying to go. above and beyond to normalize it for. women because it's not normalized for. women so I appreciate you saying that. because I think there's so many women. that are going to listen to this not. that you need to be like the advocate. for like no coming through penetration. but it it makes people really mad it. does it makes people well I mean not.
about me but like oh shoot there was. this documentary about this woman who. had. um uh she was doing all these studies. and and was like sh shoot do you have an. information person no yeah we can Google. the height report the height report or. the kite report the kite report the. height or the kite very different but. could be the height report the height. report and she was like she was. reporting on women's real sexual. experiences and like giving feedback and. she was like completely of course.
shunned and of course had to like move. to Europe which is what we do with all. of our famous shun people classic just. do you pull your dick out when no one. wants that go to. Europe no I appreciate you saying that I. think there's a lot of people that have. experienced that and I am absolutely not. coming every time whatsoever from. penetration but my vibrator does the. trick God bless God bless this show is. sponsored by better help let's talk. about 2020. okay every January brings you.
365 blank pages waiting to be filled now. to some that can be daunting you're like. oh my God wait a second no and others. can be like wow this is such an. opportunity I see this as an opportunity. daddy gang to work on yourself and to. become a better version of yourself in. 20125 in 2025 maybe you're ready for a. plot twist or maybe there's a part of. your story you've been wanting to revise. life isn't about resolutions that fade.
by February it's about picking up the. pen and becoming the author of your own. life boom bam boom think of therapy as. your editorial partner helping you write. the new chapters and create the. meaningful story you deserve to live I. understand it can be daunting when. you're like I don't even know how I. would begin therapy like there's so much. to unpack well guess what the more that. you stress that you haven't started it. you're wasting time you could have. already broken into that trauma you. could have already broken into those bad.
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Write Your Story with betterhelp visit. betterhelp.com Daddy to get 10% off your. first month that's betterhelp. hp.com. Daddy okay when do you feel you're most. confident on. stage doing. standup I think that's amazing is it. yeah you feel your most what if I was. like as a mom no I'm like. um yeah cuz I'm like you know it's like.
you're playing a a little bit of a part. you know even though my like stage. Persona is pretty close to who I am it's. still like you're in charge and. empowered and you know whatever when. obviously like I think every again woman. in the industry I'm not saying men don't. experience it but women obviously like. tenfold like there's so much. conversation about the way we look and. who we are and our bodies and all the. convers ations and people feel so. inclined to be like I have so many. thoughts about it which is [ __ ].
insane um was there ever a point around. like the conversation around like how. you looked like impacted your selfworth. I mean it it hurts to have a lot of hate. thrown at you from the internet it. doesn't feel good I was definitely. coming up in comedy when it was you know. the height of like people on the. internet like letting you know giving. giving me feedback um yeah and I I don't. know I have always always I always. thought I've always felt.
hot i' I've got to say it I've always. felt hot and then you have moments where. you know you look in the mirror and. you're like I'm Shrek and then but like. it's like it's like I have a little. secret that I'm like I'm secretly hot. you know what I mean and I've always had. that and I don't know I'm 43 I'll see we. check in um I think that's a couple. years when we're both living in Europe. yeah yeah true [ __ ]. this interview like everyone's like get. the [ __ ] out no I think that's like.
really great to hear because like I you. can almost see when specific women that. are public figures CU those are the only. people we get to watch unless you're. like staring at your neighbor like a. freak um you can tell when someone's. going through it you can tell when like. everyone is picking her part everyone is. and I'm always like God damn this is not. natural I wonder how she's doing so it's. nice to hear that you're like I'm. [ __ ] hot [ __ ] shut up I like I. believe that I'm hot you are when I I. was going. through I guess it was like a year ago.
and the internet really came for me. after doing a bunch of press and um and. I was like okay everybody like relax but. then I was like but but then like. doctors were chiming in in the comments. and they were like no no we think you. like something's really up like your. face looks so crazy that we think. something's up and I'm like I'm like. wait I'm getting trolled by doctors you. know and they were like we think you. have something called Cushing and it's. like about spiking cortisol like about.
you know cortisol levels and you know St. steroids you know injection whatever and. I was like wait okay I was like [ __ ] off. and then I was like wait I have been. getting steroid. injections um for my um in my scars um. God here you know you're everybody in. your audience is going to want to [ __ ]. me. um um I had a breast reduction you know. C-section whatever I'm I'm like. you know and so I got these was getting. these steroid injections and so it gave.
me this thing called Cushing syndrome. which I wouldn't have known if the. internet hadn't come for me so hard so. right before I started filming kind of. pregnant um which you guys have to check. out on Netflix we're getting there I. was uh like before right before we. started rolling was when I learned I had. this condition and that I had something. called moon face and then there's just. I'm starring in a movie and there's a. camera right in my face and I'm like and. they're like rolling and I'm like oh my. God and uh you know I asked some of the.
people close to me and everyone's like. you look great you know but then you. have like your one friend from high. school that's like your face is looking. like a little bit insane and you're like. okay I love you yeah and so anyway I got. rid of like it just has to work itself. out there are two there are two kinds of. Cushing where in one of them you could. die God so for like 24 hours I was like. I'm dead yeah so I was feeling really. down on myself before I started filming. this movie I am so sorry but I'm happy.
that you're okay thank you and but I. want to say something else yeah I was. feeling so down myself and I was like. really having trouble figuring out how I. was going to star in a movie while I had. this going on and it just took. one friend who this girl Lorraine who. lives in New Orleans um who's a director. Lorraine Caffery she uh she. was like you know what and you know I. think you look [ __ ] great and you're.
going to like she just and I just needed. one person to just amp me up and I you. know you're like let's go which is also. did you see the movie young adult no oh. was Charlie Theon wait no okay you have. to see this movie okay anyway that's. just I don't want to spoil the end for. you but I'll watch it you know you just. need one person to be like go I think. that's like really incredible but you. did the [ __ ] toe I can't I can't wait. are you like Chelsea Handler like you. get grossed out by feet well oh it's.
just that I don't have a like a pedicure. no I don't give a [ __ ] about the. pedicure I'm just shocked you don't have. socks on that's my only note and then. I'm going to keep it the no because like. who the [ __ ] shows up to an interview. with no socks on and shows up also with. sneakers on with no socks on okay but. ma'am you also are dressed like you're. in hospice so like why like but why so. why guess you copied me I did I couldn't. you know how quick I wanted to come here. I mean that's it you dress like you're. in hospice and I love it it's like yes. so cozy it's so cozy come on um can we.
talk about your husband I'd love to. Chris Chris and he's a chef yep okay is. it true that if you are married to a. chef like they never cook for you cuz. they're cooking all the time no that's. that's not true oh my God I have to tell. my friend who literally is married to a. chef and she's like it just sucks cuz he. never cooks for me he literally hates. you wait oh my. God oh my God yeah no your friend's. husband hates her oh my God they just. got engaged well that's going to that's. going to be called.
off that's [ __ ] up he doesn't cook for. her anyway to he does it so much like. he's tired but this is this is like and. and Chris knows too it's like I can. never leave him yeah like what what. you're what am I going to do yeah you're. indebted to him yeah he's what's the. main dish that's the thing it's always. yeah he's so last night he made shrimp. pad tie but also you know I keep in the. back of my head you know for a rainy day. yeah I can just get take.
out okay but no um you know is that when. you're in fights and he's like well then. I won't cook you're like I'm already on. door Dash I have never yelled at him I. can just get take out but I am keeping. that tucked in the it's kind of iconic. yeah no we uh like we get along like. we're just like toxic together and love. those are the best relationships yeah um. when obviously you're like very famous. and yeah thanks thank you yeah still at. the height you know I try to remind him.
yeah like you're a big [ __ ] deal yeah. he's like can you go want don't you go. in and I'm like I'm like very famous and. he's like okay he just is not interested. he he doesn't care I was going to say. like what does he think of this [ __ ]. chaos no it's like the same with my son. or my husband it's like your mom and. like you're my like I like I you know I. think sometimes he'll try to empathize. with it uhhuh uh he doesn't care he. doesn't give a he doesn't care he he's. been around he like grew up on Martha's. Vineyard oh so he's so no it's like on.
Martha's Vineyard there's like the rich. people and then there's like the people. that work for the rich people and that. was him and that was him and and you. know there's a nice Community when like. and I feel lucky that I grew you know. grew up most of my life like very like. without any money because you know Chris. had to really hustle to make it as a. chef I had to really hustle to make it. like didn't have a relative to ask for. $100 yeah and um. so but he did grow up with like some. famous friends and oh that's kind of.
nice wait how old is your child I want. to say. five yeah he's five and a half we have. you shown him any of your movies he has. seen trolls 3 okay which I did a voice. in yeah yeah and he has seen the moment. in train wreck when I fall like when I. try to. dunk and he's he came in a lot when I. was editing kind of pregnant what does. he think is like Mommy he's is like he. thinks that the stunts are funny he does. um yeah like the Zamboni scene does he.
understand that I don't think he saw the. Zamboni scene why not too aggressive. probably it probably would have scared. him it's a little much yeah that the. first couple hits were good and then. when you guys took out the whole like. Side Car of the restaurant I was like. Jesus that was I I have to be honest and. just say that that was not the that was. not written by me that part and also the. part in train wreck where I come out and. dance was not my idea either it wasn't.
no this is this is that's the male. intervention okay it was kind of funny. we'll give them that yeah the Zamboni. was funny yeah um okay and also thank. you for like telling everyone the end of. my movie no it's the beginning of the. movie [ __ ] cut this cut this something. crazy happens on Aon no nobody would. nobody would remember no and it's not. too like no well I mean you know not to. just to quickly because I know you've. talked about this before but um.
you talked about how your husband has. autism how did you guys like decide to. be public about that not that you. shouldn't I'm just curious like it's. kind of well I didn't ask him no I'm. just kidding um just one night well we. were the the way it happened was I was. going to document making this special a. standup special and then I found out I. was pregnant and we're like okay great. great that'll be part of the dock and. then I was so.
sick um I had something called hyper. hyperemesis gravidarum. which this is good anybody listening if. you have severe nausea and vomiting and. everyone's going it's the first. trimester and you're like I don't know. hyper umis gravidarum it's a work wait. hyper hyper Isis gravid so say like slow. slow hyper hyper no hyper. hyper means like a lot emesis means.
means nause emis emesis emesis means. vomiting I just wanted you to say it. slow so I could say it with you. hyperemesis emesis gravidarum gravidarum. I feel like we're in like the craft and. we're like hyperemesis grav like we're. going but yes and they really under. diagnose everything with women including. endometriosis hello you're not supposed. to have VI cramps that's not normal it. usually takes 10 years to get a.
diagnosis for endometriosis [ __ ]. insane anyway you something's up yep. it's not just normal you're not being. dramatic anyway and then my husband was. on the Spectrum no I'm just kidding so. then um after we were married like a. couple months he would just do things. where I'd be like it would be such a. different response than I was that you. like sort of we were used to you know. one time I fell and you know it's like. everybody would be like are you okay you. know and he would just kind of like like.
just stare you know and it was like oh. and uh and he would also just say things. in front of people part of what I fell. in love with was that he'd be like you. know why is your like outfit so weird. are you you know and uh says exactly. what he thinks and I was like would you. be interested I I I just did like a. little online test just. me and uh and I was like oh for my test. I was like he's on the. and I said to him would you be. interested in learning more about your. brain like would you want to find out if.
you were on the Spectrum and he was like. yeah and that's a nice also way to like. approach something yeah and he uh had he. said like no I would have been like all. right but he went he he was tested and. um yeah and like and it's it's been. amazing like it's it's been amazing for. him yeah and for me it's like but it's. because it's public and there aren't. aren't many adults out yeah like. everyone's like quiet about it because.
there's such a stigma so it's you know I. think he's like really cool and brave. that he's like out there like yeah and. and how many and like how many people do. you know where you're like this person's. on the Spectrum who cares they're like. my favorite people I agree like I think. it's nice obviously it's not like his. burden to bear to be like the poster. child of but like it's nice I agree. because there are so many people but. it's like there's a stigma around it. which there shouldn't be no it's it's.
stupid and I remember when I was a kid. people were embarrassed about ADHD and. now like people that's the second thing. they'll tell you about themselves you. know and so I just I hope that it gets. more normalized and like and I you know. I feel like he's done his part and um I. think it's great yeah great and you know. what I like you know he of course annoys. me and like there are days where I like. you know want to kill him but we I would.
still choose him out of everyone I've. ever. met um yeah I love it and not just cuz. he's a chef but God that doesn't hurt. and someone you can talk [ __ ] with done. um can we talk about your new movie even. though I ruin the entire ending yes I'm. going to cut it yes do you have any more. spoilers you I'm going to go through the. entire movie um no I was cackling I was. saying to everyone this morning I'm like. I I it was so nice seeing you lead. another movie because you are so.
physically funny comedy wise like no the. way. you that sounds so creepy but like move. your body and you're just like very very. physically funny and that is like a hard. thing to do obviously you're like. verbally funny but you're just so. [ __ ] good that's so nice and it's an. honor to sit on this couch with you oh. my God this is such a nice couch um no. when I saw this like suede ass couch I. said yes no that's really nice because I. haven't I haven't starred in a movie in.
a while this script was sent to me you. know and like I'm like a little snot. like I won't do you know I'm like for. for me to like give that much time and. energy to something I have to be into it. and I was like I think this is a really. good idea a woman faking a pregnancy is. so insane yeah and uh and I just there. was like the backbone was there like the. skeleton was there to like you know I to. to to shape a bunch of it and you know I. like I'm trying to just show women.
having fun and being equals you know and. like female. friendships and so it was like that was. all so there for me and clearly the. point of the movie like it's you know. it's described as a romcom and it is but. it kind of isn't it's like more about. like the the love story of the. friendships so the entire movie is like. hilarious it's like every single scene I. feel like just keeps ramping up ramping. up like the knife in the child scene I. was like ho wa now this movie no one's.
going to see it because it's like no no. when you stab no I didn't say that I. said knife in the child scene yeah yeah. but do you now hear it out loud and like. see that knife yeah yeah they're like. it's a horror film no no no it is one of. the funniest scenes No Children Are. stabbed in this mie he's holding a knife. okay okay just like they're like am. shmer goes on call her daddy and they. talk. about there is no child gets um stabbed.
no child stabbed child holding knife. funny funny scene funny funny child. knife not scene and scene and scene um. but one of my favorite like themes in. the movie is the fact that these women. it's all about timelines and I feel like. that is the most [ __ ] realistic. conversation I have on the show so often. it's like everyone comparing like the. timeline here and oh you're having a. baby but I'm not engaged yet but you're. divorced and oh my God and I'm single. and I want kids or I'm doing IVF or I. can't get pregnant like there's so much.
and the reason that we get anxious is. cuz we're looking around and we're like. where am I where am I like how always. asking you it's insane how do you think. this movie does a good job of like kind. of embodying the concept of like stop. constantly comparing yourself to other. people around you yeah I think you know. this movie is about a like I think. my character is Laney and she when she's. a little girl loses her mom and is just.
like doesn't want to be alone so like. has the idea of like wants a lot of. family around her and I didn't have a. lot of family around me as a kid and I. connected to that and I would my friends. would have like big families and I would. kind of go and hang with them and be. like oh one day I want a family and like. she just thinks that's a way to not be. alone and then um you know realizes that. you're I mean for me my my favorite. times are with my girlfriends yeah and.
like laughing and having a dinner or. whatever my I'm really close with my. girls from home and and my friends that. I've made since I've been older and like. that's where a lot of my joy comes. from um I don't ever say joy in real. life so I feel like just because I'm on. this couch can you just like believe can. you voice over and have someone say. something I would say like Jo like what. um. wow wow wow wow wow but my good my Good.
Vibes and having fun you know it's like. I love joyful yeah I I love my family um. but you know you're girls yeah no it's. so true and I feel like also as you get. older especially with kids or someone. that's not having kids like there feels. like there can be this disparity within. friendships where I have so many women. right in being like Oh my God I I like I. feel like I'm getting disconnected to my. friend cuz she just got married and I'm. single and I'm like I so get that that. could be a feeling but that who gives a. [ __ ] where you're each at like the.
reason you're friends is because you. like each other as human beings and I. think I was the last one of my friends. like to have a kid and I didn't I was. not someone who was like always knew she. wanted to be a mom and uh yeah it wasn't. until Chris was literally like we're. going to have a family and I was like a. um but I am also like if if you were. like if someone's like should I five. kids I'm like probably. not you know like it's not looking good.
you know things aren't looking good so I. just I I think it's and also I think. people get intimidated if you haven't. like ever spent time around little kids. you you feel confused and so your. friends can kind of alienate themselves. because they're like okay I don't. understand this and I don't understand. children but you know you don't you love. your friends and you want them to be a. part of your life and but you don't want. them to be uncomfortable it's like I. would love for my friends who don't have. kids to like be in my life or my child's.
life um but because you but then it's. like you have a kid you you understand. that I don't need you don't like you. don't need your friends to fallone over. your kid you you have such a good thing. with your kid and you know they're cute. and you know they love you so you don't. you don't need and I think people think. oh I'm supposed to play some other role. yeah like like you don't even need to. mention like the kid's name but I I'll. be like obsessed with some of my friends. kids and like you know they're but but. then also like I don't remember all. their names and like it's like you have.
your own like you're like I'm good me. and my kid are good like yes you know. and but but really I'm not like if. someone were like you know I just don't. feel like everybody has to have kids no. and that's what I was going to say like. I feel like people can read the room. better if you are a mother and you know. your friend has been struggling and. whether she can't have kids or she. doesn't want to have kids stop being the. one being like let me just show you one. more photo like that's sick knock it off. my every one of my friends I I would say. I would say like almost 100% of my.
friends have had miscarriages and and I. feel like lucky that we all like yeah. feel comfortable sharing that with each. other yeah because like it's so painful. and you know whatever I'm like going to. say people don't talk about it but they. do because I've heard people say they. don't talk about it but I just feel like. it's the it's the most sensitive thing I. think for any woman like that's the most. painful thing I can imagine yeah and I. feel like your your movie though brings.
light to what is a very sensitive topic. and I I found a lot of like I don't know. I just enjoyed it because yes there is. so much negative around it of like you. we aren't allowed to talk about this and. then it's like oh we're bitching if we. talk about it too much but if we don't. open up about it then we're not honest. and real and like there's just so much. that goes into being a [ __ ] woman. like we've talked about this entire. episode um and I promise I'm wrapping up. but. um I think I'm having the best time are. you are did you have a good time yeah.
like are you going to leave here and be. like I'm going to leave here and be like. feel like I just hung out with a good. friend I I hope that's not embarrassing. no no no I I was so vulnerable in the. beginning this telling you I was like. kind of like a [ __ ] fan and I'm like. dming you like a creep and now now we. have like cred like now if I DM you. you're going to answer me not in like. three years you'll you'll answer me. tomorrow two years Amy Schumer thank you. for com and call our daddy thanks for. having me you're amazing.
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