The Saddest Situation We've Ever Seen | Financial Audit

My name is Mary. I am 25 years old. I am. from College Station and this is. financial audit. What do you do in. College Station for a living right now? I am a pool cleaner and I am a Papa. John's driver part-time. Ooh, okay, interesting. So, what got you into that. line of work? Pool cleaning? Yeah. My. boss. I have the greatest bosses in the. whole entire world, but I used to be a. waitress at Cracker Barrel. I met them, they worked for another pool company. They worked really, really, really, really hard. And I was like, "Ooh, I.

like that. I want to work for y'all.". And they were like, "Mhm, you probably. couldn't do it." And I was like, "Mhm, I. bet I could." Because it's a lot harder. than people think it is. It's a very. physically and mentally demanding job. Um, but so, I left that job. I kept in. contact with them, proceeded to work my. butt off when I got to Papa John's, settled down there, started working like. 75 hours a week. And I was like, "I'm. going to work for y'all." And one day, they started their own company. They got super, super busy. So, they.

worked for another pool company when I. first met them. And then, they opened their own pool. company. And I was like, "You're going. to let me work for you." Okay. And. they're like, "No, probably not." And. I'm like, "No, you're going to. Like, I'm going to show you I can work for. y'all." So, one day, they got busy. enough and they were like, "Okay, come. part-time. You're going to work on. commercial pools." So, that's what I. specifically work on is like apartment. and like, um. and I've slowly. gotten into residentials, but I won. I. got the job, so. Well, good for you. What What How many.

hours a week do you work with that job? Uh, that job, I We're on a pretty set. schedule right now. I probably do. like 8:00 to 5:30. Oh, every day? Yeah, I have And then, how many at the. Papa John's? Uh, I'm there. 23 hours. Jeez, that's a lot of working. What do. you make from the pool? I'm I bring in. 877 after taxes every Friday. So, 1,000 before taxes. It Oh, oh, well, 877, so not what drops.

into my account every Friday. Oh, okay. So, So, 1,000 before tax. the pool cleaning? Yes. So, an average of. $3,800 a month. when broken out between some of the. longer ones and some of the shorter ones. hitting your account. Okay, very good. And then with the Papa John's, what are. we making? On a low average, 600 a. month. Okay. Okay. Before taxes? Yes. No, no, no, no, no, no, after.

After, okay. Yeah. Very good. So, you're doing okay. All. right. So, what would you say your financial. picture looks like from your perspective. right now, and then give yourself a. score zero out of 10. Um, probably like. a two or a three. Not, I'm. I didn't know savings, an emergency fund. mattered. The only reason I I didn't. know it was a thing. Um, I financials in my growing up wasn't. a thing. Um, like my mom's never had a.

job in my whole entire life. Interesting. Um, my dad's always had a. job, but he was never good with money. So, he was always just winging it. Classic American. Yes. Yeah. Um, and then he recently just. got married, and. this the his my stepmother. and him have gotten a lot better with. their finances, and they're just kind of. doing their own thing. Um, my financials. have grown. Um, I know I've always been. great at paying the bills. Just nothing outside of that. you at today, though? I'm okay. I don't I'm good at paying my.

bills. Okay, so. savings. Minimums are met. Yes, and that's about. it. Like, and used to, an emergency to. me was like I could buy a car battery. And that's where I'm at. Like, if I had. to buy a car battery tomorrow, I could. Okay. And that wasn't an accomplishment. for me. Um, but I recently just got. custody of two kids. And I kind of have to think about them. So Were were they your biological kids? No. Okay. I ended up getting custody of. my two youngest brothers. Oh.

So they are six and seven. I've now had. them for about a year and five months. But it's become a little bit more. permanent. Their parents just got their. rights terminated. So it's looking a. more. official long-term Are they living with. you? Yes. Do you have a significant other? Not. that lives with me. Not that lives with. you. Okay. So pretty early days. for that relationship. Um we've been. together for a year and a couple months. Okay. So pretty So yeah. Okay. Um he.

lives he lives in Arlington. So he's. still. we're still separated on most aspects. So you're now fully taking care of two. children. What are their ages? Six and. seven. Seven-year-old's going on eight. Young. Okay. I also have a grandmother that. lives with me. What? How old is she? She is. like 69, 70. Not to trash talk I. definitely don't want to your parents or.

anything like that. But what's going on? They're not taking care care of their. parents they're not taking care of their. kids. What's what's happening? So my grandmother that's living with me. is. my mom. So the boys' mom. So the boys. are my brothers. Oh they're your brothers. up having to take in. Wait. But it's not. your grandma then. Yes. Yes. It's my grandma. Well okay. So the boys that I have Yeah. are my. brothers. No I got that one. We all were birthed by the same woman. Yeah. Why why aren't what happened.

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or check out the link in the description. below. Uh. the case page says medical neglect, possible drugs. Mhm. Which is definitely drugs. She's. probably never going to see this, so I. can say she's on drugs cuz there's no. chance of her seeing this, yeah. And the grandma is the mother of which. parent? My mom. So, the one that lost her. kids. Um. she. came to with me because I was not I. couldn't just fully take on two kids. with like no child care or anything. because CPS was not funding them at all.

So, they received zero help for like the. first seven or eight months I had them. or something. Um so, Nana moved in with me so I had. child care because they also were not in. school the first 4 months that I had. them. So, I went from And at that time, I was working 6:00 a.m. to 9:00 p.m. And then I was handed two kids. Yeah. So, you're out there saving lives, essentially. So, Nana had to move. with me to help with that. Um. So, is she is she she's helping with the.

kids? Nana, yes. She hasn't had to as. much. We're on a better schedule with. the boys and like after school, we're on. a pretty set schedule. I have them and. stuff. They're pretty occupied. be like summer vacation coming up and. stuff. Um I found summer school care um. school, but not summer school. Cost money? Yes, but I found the most affordable one. that I think is government programmed. What's it going to cost you? It was 200. for the whole summer. Oh, okay. I already paid for it, got it out of the. way. as child care goes, I mean, that's.

insanely incredible. there will only be So, it's a 9-week. thing, but I think they're out for 1. week. Um. The original one I was looking at was. 17, almost $1,800. Um but I had to pay it like all right. then and there. And I was like, "Well, I. can't. I literally can't.". battery money, but we don't have that. Yeah. Okay. No, yeah. At the time, I. maybe did, but then it was going to put. me at like 300, and then I was going to. feel like I was at that point where I. was like. Uh With this situation, this means I. really want you going to have an.

emergency fund more than almost anyone, because. me. There's two people you're taking care of. now. Mother's out of the picture. Where's Dad? Uh my dad's doing his own. thing. You know, he's married, has a. just got a house. Yeah, he's he's living. a And he's not helping with the kids? No, cuz they're they're not his kids. They're they're different kids. Uh is. the father of those kids providing child. support? pled guilty to 10 years in prison. Right. So, no. What did he do? It doesn't matter, but. what did he do? I honestly do not know. I don't know.

what he pled guilty to. So, I it's. either along the lines of theft or. evading. Um. I know that he was on the run for like 6. months. Um, and it physically got out of police. hands at least three times. Like the police had him in his grip. And he got away somehow. One one time he. ran around town naked for like 4 days on. the run. Like they showed up at the house he was. at was like, "Hey, we're here to get. you.". He was in the shower and said, "Okay, I'm naked. Hold on." They shut the door.

He jumped out of the window naked. And was out for like 4 days. And then. they ended up finding him. in my grandma's attic. Oh my god. I. think. Um, so yeah. It's really hard when the boys ask me. because I can't tell them. Like I I it's. not my place to do that. At some point. maybe, but they're really young. Um, wow. Well, jeez. How are they doing? They're better.

Much better. It has been a progress. My. youngest one when I first got him, he. didn't talk very much. Um, his. vocabulary and just the fact that he can. count has gotten has grown so much. His. teacher said that he loved to learn. That was a big deal. Um, my oldest has a lot of anxiety. Mhm. Um, and maybe. has some other I don't want to say. issues, but I don't know how else to say. it. Like he has a habit of like eating. everything. So like I had a problem with. him eating chapstick. Mhm. Um, like. there was one time I gave him chapstick.

cuz he has chapped lips. And I was like, "Hey, chapstick, here you go." I'm Oops, sorry. I'm going to line it up how I. line up my chapstick in my room. Like. these are chapstick. You put it on your. lips when you're chapped. Next day, couple days I went in there, all six. tubes were empty. And I was like, "Where did the six tubes of chapstick. go?" He ate all of them. Have they. received any mental health care? Yes. I finally got it set up cuz it took. a long time for their stuff to go. through. And then I did finally find a. therapist for them.

Good. Then they canceled on them. No. So, they were going for. a couple We did it for a couple months. and it was great. He came every. Saturday. They looked forward to it. Um, but then he called and he was like, "I'm so sorry. I can't come today. They. just told me that I'm I just can't. They. canceled his insurance." And I'm like, "Okay.". So, Do you have insurance? Do you have. insurance? I do not have insurance. The boys have. insurance though. So, the boys are. covered. Okay, so you've been seeking trying to.

find out Okay. Yes, the they sent me recommendations to. people to go to. Um, the oldest, he. has been receiving therapy from somebody. from A&M. Okay. So, but she's only going to be. temporary. So, she's she's up for like. the month. Um, like after school ends. So, I'll. have to look for something definitely. during the summer for sure. But that. lady's been doing lovely with him. She. She's been great. All right. Well, we. need to get into your finances. and see where things are. But this I.

mean this is set up quite the situation. Um, so thank you for all that context. and thank you for subscribing cuz we're. trying to get to 500,000 subscribers. And thank you to everyone who has. subscribed so far. Let's get into your. stuff. Do we have two months of this. Chase? Is this the same account? Yes, it's the same account. But again, I. didn't know how the statements worked. But whenever you had asked for them, which would was like a week or two ago, it was only the 14th. So, I didn't know. what point they it showed the. statements. Well, it just does like the last 30 days.

so you get to the most recent. So, this. one's the most recent that I have here. We start with $1,336. $7,000 came in. I mean that's that's way. beyond what we have here. So, we'll see. what that's about. We'll pop it. Oh, I receive $785. a month for the boys. Oh, plus an additional 785? Yes. Okay, very good. And 6,000 went out then. an additional. 2,000 went out plus fees of five bucks. cuz you probably didn't have the minimum. balance necessary and $450 is all that.

was left. at the time of the statement. Okay. So, yes. Money that came in Well, we had. deposits. The deposit of 930, it doesn't. say what it's from. There is payroll. that I'm seeing, but 930 deposit. Papa John's. Okay. I get paid off of ins. payroll. payroll. Texas deposit of 157 of some kind. And. then And then instant payroll, that's. probably Papa John's. So, I don't know. what that means. other one, the 157 you just said?

Yeah. That was Papa John's. Okay, but what's. the 930? It just says deposit. I probably deposited that. Where'd you get it from? With cash. It's probably cash that I'd. been saving. So, you save up cash on the. side? No, I probably saved up cash because I. was going on a trip. Okay. And there is. a family thing, there's some payroll. payroll. Okay. Cool. So, this is a. little over 30 days actually, so that. may be why there's some extra money. Uh, just barely. I'm trying to think of when that This is. April?

It's probably the end of March and. April. Uh, yes, it's March April. Okay. So, I went We went on a birthday. anniversary birthday trip for 3 days. with my me, my partner and his parents. Okay. So, fizzoli's. we're doing work uh, renting a car. That. was for the trip most likely. I get it. Yes, I got. Did I get money for that? custody? I It has become more permanent the last. 2 months, but I have had them in my care. for the last year.

You're going out to eat a lot. Mexican. restaurant, frozen custard, SeaWorld, that was probably, you know, the trip. again. SeaWorld, SeaWorld, SeaWorld, SeaWorld, SeaWorld stuff. And Little. Caesar's, Texas Roadhouse, Sonic. drive-thru, Old Navy And there's of. course things you're going to have to. get for the kids, especially now that. they're newly under your care. But. uh, car park, coffee, and Mexican. restaurant and. Five Stars and tequila and coffee.

Brookshire. Yeah, Brookshire Brothers. Yeah, okay. And coffee and Wendy's. Stripes, I don't know what that is. Gas. station. That's gas station, okay. It's. $4, so I don't think that's gas. Sally. Beauty, coffee You get coffee a lot. Yes. Yeah, cuz this is like almost every day, every other day. Yes. And the Brookshire. and we're getting so with cheap things. from Stripes constantly as well. That's because that's my most of the. time it's my only access to a bathroom.

You paid Sometimes. to the Yes. Yes, so I always like I'll. get like. a water or something because I I drive. for my at pools. Okay. You don't have to. pay to use the bathroom though. No, but when you go into a gas station. sometimes. spend money. Well, it depends on the. situation. It depends on your situation. whether it's better or not. We need to. get a full picture. have a couple gas stations that I have. to, like they will not let me use it. The Stripes most of the time I can get. away with it. Well, it might be my it's. my only one in that area. I can't leave. that area. Okay. And coffee, Sonic, and.

Chef Chows, coffee, Roku. I mean, this is this is getting crazy. That Gateway is there there there What. up? And chicken Okay. What I'm either. What I'm Great Wolf Lodge, okay. Yeah, that's pretty expensive. Freddy's, I. haven't been to one of those in a while. The Great Wolf Lodge. specifically. And Chicken Express and. Google thing and Amazon Prime. coffee, Subway, my goodness, dude. Carport Coffee, Fazoli's, Sonic. What is.

very clear, immediately sticking out and. I don't know the financial situation, but you said you don't have an emergency. fund. But we if we don't have an. emergency fund and we have dependents. We have dependents including your. grandma and two children. going to Fazoli's and getting coffee and. Sonic and snow cones all within the same. day and all these things and I'm not. going to go through this whole thing cuz. this is pages and pages and pages and. pages of pizza and coffee endless coffee. and snow cones and stupid coffee and.

Chick-fil-A and pizza and this is going. into gas stations all this crap I'm not. going to go through this this pages and. pages and pages spending so much money. if we don't have an emergency fund we're. not doing this especially with the. pendants because the safety net that is. necessary for a good survival is much. more important than a daily coffee a. daily snow cone a daily water bottle. from a gas station a daily Chick-fil-A a. daily this that this much more important. than going to Great Wolf Lodge much more. important than going to SeaWorld.

So why are we doing all this? It sounds. like you've learned the importance of. having an emergency fund and all this. stuff. You mentioned well I've been. growing I have more money on the side. than I used to in the past. But this is clearly if you know you need. an emergency fund why are we possibly. doing this like five times a day? Well that's recently like when I just. started watching you. on. Well when's when's recently cuz this is. recently this is middle of last month. I This month. have been binging you probably for the.

last two three weeks. Mhm. Um emergency. fund to me was a three to six hundred. dollars. Mhm. Because we did that wasn't. a thing for us so I didn't know what. that was didn't know why why you would. have that cuz to me I'm just like oh I. lose my job I got to go get a job. Cuz I've always worked like every every. ability I've had to work I've always. worked but. my. Okay so the Great Wolf Lodge thing. Mhm. That's because I've had two kids begging.

me to go. Mhm. And you can only. say no so many times. Kind of I mean you can say no forever. but. I mean I don't have kids, but what I. will say is. they might not understand it. Maybe a. conversation eventually would have to. happen. I don't think they're. necessarily old enough to understand it, but hey, guess what? Us. right now, uh well, I don't even know. how to say it to a little kid, to be. Yeah, no, it's hard.

But but you know, you know that having. an emergency fund increases their. safety. And once you have an emergency. fund or get out of We don't even I don't. even I don't know what the debt. situation looks like, but once we're in. a better situation, and we have a fully. funded emergency fund, no debt, then is. when go to Great Wolf Lodge every other. week if you can afford it. I don't give. it. But you can't do it now. Yeah. So, I don't care if they're begging. I. will say. in to a kid that cries in the grocery. store every single time they want a. candy bar? The big part with money with.

kids specifically are kids that have. money trauma. Mhm. So, like there are. kids that um. grow up that are scared of money. Yeah. And from um. like constantly being told that they. don't have money. And then there's kids that are obviously. with money because they've always had. too much money. So, there's both drastic ways. Um the.

boys came from a hoarding situation. Hoarding within the house? Yes. Okay. Um. So, used to we were eating out all the. time, and my grandma Oh, I don't know if. she's going to watch this. She's sort of. an enabler. Mhm. Um so, we would go to Carter's. every Tuesday because Carter's was half. off. Carter's was no longer half off when I'm. paying for absolutely everybody to go. Yeah. And uh I also have two other. adults and a baby living in the house.

that are not the two boys. and the grandma. Currently. Okay. So, and. I don't want to say they don't work, but. they don't work. Um they might do DoorDash right now for. like an hour a day, but I maybe a couple. hours, but they they don't work. And. that's not bashing DoorDash drivers, by. the way. Do you um No, I don't think. anyone's. But. uh. So, the eating So, okay. Well, the big. issue with eating out is with me is it's.

mostly lunch. So, I eat out at lunch at my job. Um. because cold food causes me to overeat. So, like if I pack a sandwich, it. doesn't do anything to me. So, then I'll. be like, "Oh, I'm still hungry. I'm. going to go eat.". But I bought a I bought a lunch box. Okay. that heats up my food. Oh. I. bought it last week. The only times I. have not used it. are when my boyfriend was here. and whenever um. Fazoli's on Tuesdays is $3.

So, that's why I go to Fazoli's on. Tuesdays. But normally I go with. somebody, and he pays for it. I have a. friend that I go with. Oh, they pay for it. That's fine. Yeah, I can I'm going to use him. I'll use him. and make him pay for my Fazoli's. Um but. that's what it is is I won't miss. Fazoli's cuz it's $3 for like a full. plate, and that's just such a good deal. for me to just be out. Um but also I. don't have a problem making pasta, and I. can put it in my little little heat. thing. Yeah, cuz I was going to say. pasta's like 50 cents. Yeah, pasta's pasta's so affordable to. but.

Let's talk about that example you. provided. You said some people come from. no money, some people come from a lot of. money, and it causes the different. things. And they come from a hoarding. situation. Do they come from the no. money side is what I'm assuming. Yes, but they Well, they came from a. side that. money's stupid, and you can steal what. you want. No, no, they come from a side money. wasn't a thing, but they somehow had. hoverboards and trampolines, but they also played outside in a. backyard with broken glass. type situation, and there there are ways.

to tell a child no without telling them. no. Yeah. But it's very hard when they ask ask ask. ask ask and then it's really hard to not. look a child in the face and be like. stop being selfish. Well, I wouldn't say. I okay, they're sure they're selfish. because of the background, but I mean. there is the way to explain. it might be time to start those. conversations. So I do. About this So. Great Wolf, we last time we went was. last year in March.

So not a couple months ago, but like a. year and a handful of months, whatever. month we're in, right? Um, so we went then. And they have asked every single month. since. And I have said no, we can't. Nope, you're going to have to wait. You're going to have to wait till it's. cheaper, till I can get a deal on it. So when we went, I got the room for $260. and that paid for like the passes to it, but then I was like since I got that. affordably, let me pay for them to get. the package. Which gave them a bunch of extra stuff.

And that made it a little bit more. expensive and I didn't know you could. take food. And I had looked it up and I. still didn't know if you could take. food. So we did take food. We just. didn't take enough to like feed four of. us for. however long we were there. So that's. why we still did eat out while we while. we were there. Sure. SeaWorld was my. grandma. She wanted to go and she I. believe she was going to pay for it. She ended up covering the other two. adults that were in the house with us. and she paid me for her scooter cuz we.

had to rent her a scooter. Sure. And. then all of the passes, the tickets that. I got for that day, she paid for like upgrading them to. season passes. So like that was her portion. The rental. vehicle, nobody in my house could rent a. car but me. So that's why the rental got put under. my car. you? I got yes. I want she paid me. I believe 600. back whatever the actual rental was. And.

then that you know, they gave me the the. deposit back for the car or whatever. The The Enterprise gave me the you know, the deposit back. Um. but. the the Great Wolf I've been rejecting. for so long. It was just really hard to. to keep doing it cuz at some point it. just seems and I'm just like it's really. hard to be like there are kids that. don't never ever ever get to go here in. their life. Please accept that y'all. have gone and it makes me look evil for. not giving them this like basic thing. cuz it's basic to them.

Yeah, I definitely I I definitely. get it. The only thing that scares me and kids. might not be able to understand this and. this is fine. If we get into a situation where we. don't have money to cover like a major. emergency and stuff like that, then that. prevents like the next five Great Wolf. lodges. Yep. So, I mean. I Again, I don't know how to approach. this conversations with the kids. That is up for the individual who's. taking care of them to understand, but. I have another statement and I do want. to get into those other adults that are. living with you by the way, which we.

will, but Uh. what you sent me screenshots of. something. I don't know what it is. I. think it's a credit card. Oh, yes. It's the Academy credit card. Again, I don't The statement thing is so. weird, but it's an Academy credit card, which is completely paid off. Okay. Um I thought it was come I didn't think. I had interest yet, but I did. When you. told me to go look through, I had to go. create an account. I had to call them to. get in. Um I definitely had interest on it. So, I was like oh, screw that and I paid it. off. It's done. I'm going to figure out. if there's like a proper way to close. it. the balance?

Uh maybe in the fours. 400s? Maybe. Maybe when I sent it to you it. was 293. That's what I'm thinking. And I see you're spending at Academy. Sports like every. few weeks. I got an Academy card is because the. boys weren't getting any funding at one. point at all. Zero. So, I got an Academy card to buy their. clothes because their kids section they. still have like six, seven dollar. clothes. Um, and then like shoes, they're in. soccer. Um, they're in swim. And uh, I also work outside. So, like I.

need like waterproof shoes and stuff. Um, and I go through I. I hate spending money on clothes and. shoes. I hate it. Not Not for the boys. My self. and stuff as well. with doing that with boys is they. deserve. to destroy a pair of clothes just like. any other child. Cuz kids go through. clothes a lot. A lot. Really fast. because they break them down. confused how that has to do with. Goodwill. a broken down shirt, it's already broken down. Like they. don't.

Another portion of that, my grandma. likes them to have new clothes. Well, she can pay for it then. But the. other thing is but. I don't care what she wants. It She can. pay for it. I don't I don't understand. how what she wants you do. That doesn't make sense. Nena is very particular on them having. nice, matching Not even nice. Not nice. like fancy. Of course, she can pay for it. I'm. confused. Clean, matching. And she does she does. pay a lot of their clothes. Good, but that doesn't mean you have to. do things. I'm not saying you can't even.

do this. I mean, we don't know your full. situation yet. But still, her wanting something doesn't equal you. doing that. Yeah, um, and I get nervous about buying. them new clothes because they're kids. What? It And also, Goodwill prices suck. So, to clarify, an example. There's garage sales and. there's a lot of stuff. I'm not even. saying you have to do that yet. Salvation Army. But, they're kids. Yeah, I know. I know. And they're they're not even in like. that area where like people. start caring about fashion in like.

middle school and high school yet. They're in elementary school. if they have I don't know how to explain. it. It's I think it's just one of those. things that like. they don't deserve this. The least I can. do is get them a nice outfit. Don't don't think about it like that. It's not about deserve. It's not about. deserve. You're in a loving spirit and. that's why, you know, it's hitting you. emotionally and I love that. I can. respect that and I do respect that and I. love that about you. That's a great. personality trait, but I promise you. it's not about deserve. It's not about. deserve when it comes to that. You all.

deserve as a family to be in a better. place financially before we start going. down the rabbit hole of. spending more money's. I'm sorry, guys. I'm an emotional sap. have to be sorry. I'm actually a. co-crier, but for some reason when like. the cameras are on me, I'm in the zone. of the episode. So, for some reason I. like can't tear up. I don't know why, but like I am a crier in general in. life. So, I definitely get it. Things. hit me easily. Um.

Okay. So, this card's paid off. Yes, and I'm. going to figure out if there's a proper. way to cancel it to just close it all. together. Do you have any other credit cards? Yes, one more. Ooh. Um and it's Ulta. I do. not have interest on it and it is not. for makeup. Just to clarify that. It's for It's for shampoo and. conditioner. Okay. For yourself? Yes, but that is not why I. originally opened the card. Is there a. balance on there? Um $93 right now. Oh.

But that's what it is. Um Do you trust yourself with credit. cards? Yeah, I pay them off. Okay. I've never had a late fee. I've never. missed a payment. Um I paid them down. every single month. The only one that. took a minute was Academy when I first. opened it because when I first opened. it, I think it was like $600 that we put. on it between Christmas cuz it was at. Christmas time maybe when I opened it or. a little bit before that. So, like we. did like a full. thing for the boys. Like. uh. like their whole new cuz they started. with nothing. They didn't have anything.

when I got them. Yeah, yeah. So, um. we did a full. like shopping thing for them and then. Christmas came. And then uh like work shoes. So, that. was all like at once, but I paid that. off I think in like 2 months. So, I've. never held a balance on the card. Um. at least a big balance or anything. I've. always paid way more than whatever the. minimum is. And then, the Ulta gets paid. off every month. Do you have any other. debts? Do you have debts? I have a loan.

and my car. A a loan and your car or a loan on your. car? no. I have my car and then I have a. personal loan that I took out. because when I got the boys, we were. going through something. Nana didn't. have money. Oh. I was panicking. getting social security? Yes. Okay. Um. She doesn't work, though. No. Okay. Um. but. personal loan balance? Left is eight eight something. 800. 8,000? No, no, no, no, no. 800. It was.

originally a 3,000 loan, $3,000 loan. And I pulled it out cuz I I was at a a. financial panic with the boys. Um This. is again where we have emergency funds. Awful loan. Yeah. Um I it was like. 17% interest and 24% APR or backwards. It had APR and interest, but I don't. know if it was you know. It sounds like. 24% interest. I mean, that's what it. would be. Okay. Okay, yeah. So, I.

have made. months or something? several principal. That's the one that I have on my phone. So, if you want me to pull that one up. to show you. What do you know what the minimum. monthly payment is? 150. Okay. And. normally what I'll do is I'll pay the. 150 and then I'll try to pay like a 100. the next week. If I have any large. income come in, um like or if I have. extra, I'll pay like 4 or 500. I think. I've done that twice. Um and then that goes straight to to. principal. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. The.

car. What's the car? A 2023 Highlander. So, you've gotten this very recently? I had a vehicle that I already had a. loan out on. and I traded it in. I was 4,000 up. I needed a bigger vehicle. I did not. have to get a new car. Yeah, you did not. have to. But I had to have a bigger vehicle and I. had I can vibe with a bigger vehicle. thing. We did not have to get new. though. No, yeah. No, I had to have a. bigger vehicle and.

the people I went through was the only. way I was going to get kind of like a. good deal on what I got. Why would you What What makes you think. it was even a good deal? of had really good hookups with it. Like. what? me out a lot on my last two cars. Like what? Um they both times have given. me 3,000 to 4,000 dollars more than what. my car was worth. Which is really good. Sure. Yes. Confident? Yeah. But. are you sure that price wasn't tacked. onto the new car you're getting? Yeah.

What was the purchase price of this car? I will I am leasing it. Which means no interest, but I'm leasing. it. Um a lot of people are getting upset. about it. like baked in though. So right now with my I'm at 27,000 for. the 3 years. But. at the end of the 3 years I can finance. it or buy it out. I don't have to trade. it in. And that's what everybody gets so. offended about. They're just like, "Oh, if you're leasing it, oh that you're. never going to own it." I was like, "No,

at the end of the 3 years. leases outside of Teslas. So I Those people don't know what. they're talking about. I do like the. vehicle, so. payment? 608. Oh, duh. My car before that was 568. And. by the way, yes, you're not. So. any fees and interest and stuff like. that is baked in by the way throughout. your entire lease term. I did There's not interest on it. That's. You're It's You're not seeing it the. same way as you would see with a car. loan. It's just already like It's.

baked in. I mean, I got I got a bigger car for the. So the the deal was I want the same like. price. It did I didn't I I know it's. going to sound dumb. I didn't care about. the overall price or care more about the. monthly price. I know. But. That's how they get people. All together the car I want to say it. was 44. It's 44? All together. And I'm leasing for that 27,000. Yeah, because well what. And then I get I you know, I can keep. it. Obviously. Well, yeah, but you're going to have to.

pay at. Okay. Cuz you can get a used 2023 Highlander. for 42,000 right now and you got brand. new. Well, the issue that we had with ours. with the who I went through, they didn't. have anything. That was the only thing. they had on the lot. Um This is where we go through someone. different. Well, you can get a 20 I. depends. So, there are I mean you can. get like a luxury platinum trim for 49.

Like what what what is this? What's the. Where you at? Cuz this can range from. mid 30s to 50. So, I don't know if you got a good deal. or not. I mean it's a I I don't. Cuz some Highlanders only have two rows. Mine have three rows. What's the purchase price? 44. No, what's the purchase price when your. lease is done? Oh, I don't know. What's the buyout? Oh, I don't know. Cuz that'll tell us what's baked in. Yeah, no I don't. To what? I just know that the lease term is the.

27,000. Yeah, but I I want to know what the. buyout is. Cuz that would tell us Yeah. what's. happening. I might have a way to figure out, but. I'm not Do you want me to look and see. if I have a way to figure it out? Uh. I can make. I don't know. You're in it you're in it. at this point. in it and the possibility of me. switching it is very very low. I'll. change everything else, but probably not. the car. Why? Why do you care about it so much? Because there is a lot. I take a lot of mental heat from a lot. of people.

Who? Everybody in my house. Well, then. It's not that Mhm. Okay, well, let's talk about those. people in your house. me to look it up? Look it up though? Uh. it's fine. It It's fine. If If we need. to figure out that stuff, we we can, but. I think we're good for now. Okay. What. are the Who are these two adults in your. house? My oldest brother and his wife. Jeez, okay. And they have a child. Yes. An infant. Yes. Oldest brother. Is this your place. your place? Me and Nana rent it. together. Okay, you and Nana rent it. together. How many rooms?

Four. Okay, so you, grandma, their kids, and. the couple and a baby, yeah? Yep. Uh or sorry, your your two youngest. brothers and then the couple and a baby. Are they paying rent? No. Okay. How old are they? 12. 29 and 30. What's going on in their. lives? They. lost their apartment and showed up with. us and then started staying there. How. long has it been? Since December. Late.

November. Okay, okay. So, my guess is enabler Nana, who is co-leasing with you, is just. going to allow them to stay no matter. what. So, originally the goal was to help. them. She was going to help them get. their own place. Yeah. Um. and that has not happened. Um which is. going to be very hard for them because. they have an eviction. Yeah. Uh. rent to them.

means that Nana will have to be like the. full person and they would have to be. occupants and that's the only way. unless they get, you know, like um help. help uh like HUD housing or something, but I think that's a wait where we're. at, uh where they're from or what you. like their area. They're in the like. Arlington area. Um I want to say we're on a wait in our. area, too. Um, so I don't know why progress hasn't. been made. They can live with you until. they can find another place.

is what I'm okay with. But, they have to pay rent, and they. have to have a plan. So, the rent issue. Mhm. is because Okay, so Nana, I don't. want to say recently came into a bunch. of money, but recently came into a bunch. of money. How so? She sold a house. Oh, very good. Yeah. Mhm. Well. Um, so. she was originally giving them finances. from the house. Mhm. And that. I don't think there's any more of it. No.

So, not I don't want Nana still has some. finance So, Nana paid off all the debt. she had. She had about 50, 60,000. dollars worth of debt. So, she paid off. everybody that she had to pay, everything that she had to do. Um, gave them gave them money. I do not. think they have any more. Um, and then I believe she's buying. their car. And was going to be paying their rent. for a year. Um This is insane. She's. Oh, wait, wait. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm. sorry. So, she paid our rent our rent.

where we're at for the year and a half, but I am still covering mine. So, Nana Are you guys split it in the. middle? Yes. What's your portion? 900. Okay. You're in College Station. Yes. Okay. I. This this is going to sound, I think, kind of radical to you, but I think it's. almost what you and your two younger. brothers that you're taking care of. need.

Yeah. Cuz you could have 1,500 bucks at. at most going to rent from yourself with. what you work right now, but I wouldn't. even I. I think it's better for going to be. better for your situation and for those. younger brothers' situations that you're. now in custody of, for you to get your. own place. Well, right now I'm on a. lease. So, I have to at least finish out. this lease. When does When does it end? I think we we still have like a over a. year. It was a 2-year lease.

What I would. try to find a way to do is if. older brother and wife and child wants. to live there, maybe they take your portion of of the. lease. And you get your own place. It's going. to be better. You can't be living with. all these people. We can't be living in. a household that's just pure chaos and. where endless enablement is happening. You're not being enabled, but you cannot. control the enablement of your older. brother if your grandma's doing it.

She's just doing it and we just can't. control their lives like that. This. I would want a more quiet, stable. household for your younger siblings that. you're taking care of. And you know, I'm. not an expert on that stuff in general, but we do I mean, it's very essential. We know that being around all that. enablement, being around the chaos of. people in and out and everything like. that. We want them to have a better future and. they can have that better future. I. think it's better if.

your brother and sister take care of. that lease. Now, how do we do that? I. think the And then you get your own. place. I think the conversation you need. to have a sit-down with Nana. And we're. saying, "Okay, they need to start taking. care of their lives so they can actually. have a future at some point." And right. now, you know, we're sure of this video. There's enablement going on and it is. holding them back and it's going to hold. them back for the rest of their lives. That we've, you know, paid for their. car, paid for their rent, we've given. them packages of money and all this. stuff. What would make sense for your.

grandchildren, all the grandchildren, is. if they took over our portion of the. rent, which was 900. 900, which two of. them together could easily come up with. easily come up with in a college time. doing DoorDash and all that stuff. That's all they did. They could easily. do that. And then once my portion is. covered, I'm going to go sign a lease. and other lease. And you know, we're just going to start. living life. And of course, you're not.

going to be out of their lives by any. means. You'll be in the same town. You'll be close. You know, we'll be. hanging out having some group dinners. and stuff like that. It'll be fantastic. But. I think that's going to be pretty. critical for your future and for his. future. actually. And by the way, not. Okay, we do need to get you health. insurance and you do need to be going to. therapy like everyone in the world needs. to be going to therapy. That's not cuz. of you thing. Oh, yeah.

But it definitely should. It'll help you. go through the situation and the. relationships and everything like that. as well. But. this is a very. difficult and interesting situation cuz. there is all emotional. It is all. relationships. And. Yeah, I think they need to step up, take. over your part. But that's hard cuz you. Nana needs to 100% agree with this cuz. if you push for it but she doesn't and. she continues to enable then Yeah.

there's nothing. Do you think she could. get on board? Well, so my biggest thing. with leaving. cuz I I don't I don't mind helping and I. don't mind living with Nana cuz living. with Nana is great. Like. so when I go to work at Papa John's, I'm. there all day on Sunday and then when I. get off of work on Fridays. Yeah. I pick the boys up, leave them at. home with her and then I go to work. until 1:00 a.m. But she can still watch them without you. living there. she's lovely to live with with that and.

I'm so I really am I'm so grateful for. her and she she and she does a really. good job helping with groceries. She. does pay for majority. She also over. buys on groceries though. So, she's in. if she over buys on groceries, she's in. charge. But, like the random trips like in the. middle of the week are me and that's me. doing like fruit and bread and milk like. that. Yeah, yeah. Um. she. it's a tricky situation. It is and it's. mentally it's a it's it's rough, too. Um.

but that also leads me to the coffee. Go on. So, my boyfriend lives 3 hours away from. me and. y'all I know 3 hours is not far, but you. got to be built for long distance and I. am not built for long distance. You. brew. So And you put it in the thing. Okay. No, no, no. So, he is passionate about. coffee. And he pays. wants to make a career out of coffee. So, we found a coffee shop that we both. like.

and it's. um. it's like a dumb thing that I share with. him that just like gives us. a dumb connection cuz we like live far. away. Um so, that's. the main reason for that is it's just. something that I share with him cuz he's. stupid obsessed with coffee. I'm still confused why he can't pay. Well, cuz he's 3 hours away. I'm going. by myself. Oh. But, it's I'm saying it's something that. And also That's it's something.

outside of my house. No. Yeah, parks and. stuff are as well and a lot of things. I. can't do that at 6:00 in the morning. going to work with the boys. What? So, I go before I go to work. So, I take. the boys and that's my little stop. You don't need it though. You can brew. I know, I know. I know and. um. I. did it this morning. where I didn't go. I know that's not a. big deal.

But, it's doable for me to not go. It. was just something that I shared with. him. And like that I could tell him about. I. know it's so dumb. Okay, tell him about. these fantastic beans that you got and. grinded and brewed. That's what I do and. it's still so much cheaper. THEN STOP GETTING COFFEE if you don't. like coffee like that. What? This is. stupid. This is stupid. No, let's come. on. I'm on your side like 99% here, but. I don't think I got a 100% answer on. will Nana be on board with talking to.

the older brother wife. Uh, yeah. Um, them taking over my lease was probably. going to be a no. Okay. Um, for a couple of reasons. Family's pain. It's the enablement and whatever. I. mean, they're out of our lives. The. thing is I just don't want them to. negatively impact you and then the. younger siblings' lives. But we need to get them the heck out of. there somehow. That needs to be a conversation that you. all have as a family though. That's That's That's.

That's That's That's Yeah, it's. difficult. Uh, how you doing? Fine. You okay? Yeah, I wish I didn't cry so easily. I'm. such a sap. I'm so sorry. Don't be sorry about it. There's nothing. to be sorry about. How much you have in. your checking account right now? 748, but. microphone? 748. Okay. But two payments. just came out, 150 and 100 for paying. off the credit card. And uh. So, is the 700 after that or before. that? After. Okay. Do you have any uh.

savings of any kind? Okay, then we. Okay. All right, here's what I'm going to need. you to do. Here's your prescription from. Dr. Hammer over here. One, do a budget for yourself. in general. It's time we do a budget. Yeah, so my budget's great when it comes. to bills. And then I normally don't budget out of. that. So, I can. We're doing one No, we're doing one. entire budget. One entire budget. Your.

needs never exceed 50%. of your income. Of your post-tax. Needs never exceed. that. So, you have to cut back on. certain things. I don't think your needs. at this point will exceed that. You're. It's three, four times a day we're going. out and doing stuff. Yeah. What I'm going to need you to do for. probably a month No. No. No. Well, it's. going to be a little longer than that. But, for the first month, I'm sorry, we're just not doing those extra things. unless someone's paying for it. Just for.

a month, cuz what you're doing is you're. saving up $800 as quick as you can on. top of the money you already have, Okay. and we're paying off the personal loan. now. Okay. And you're We're doing that by Because. you have a You actually make good money. Yeah. Good money sitting in your. account. It's It's all going to BS. Yeah. And we're not doing a Great Wolf Lodge. We're not doing a SeaWorld. We're not. doing that until that's gone. And then. what you should do with where you're at. with the the people that are dependent. on you, I would probably do $15,000 saved up as.

quick as you can. You put it in a. high-yield savings account on the side, and you never touch it unless car breaks. down, unless something medical happens, unless, you know, for some reason all their clothes burn. and you have to go buy clothes so they. can go to school, you know? Emergencies. only. Emergencies only. But, the way you. do that is for a few months because you. have a good amount of disposable income, and your needs are pretty limited. Your. actual needs, not like, they need brand. new clothes. Yeah. That's not 100% a need right now. Not,

we need Visoli's, even though it's only. $3. We need this. We need the nicest. groceries. Whatever it is. Everything. else outside of the budget that you. designed for what your needs are needs. to go to save up 10 to 15,000 dollars as. quick as you can. Once you get there and. you feel comfortable, then you can do. max 50% on your needs, max 30% on your. wants. You can go do that stuff and I encourage. give them the time of their lives. They. have a long time left before they leave. the household. You can give them so.

much, but the quicker we get that. emergency fund done. and pay off that personal loan, it's incredible. We're probably paying. this lease off until it's done. It was a. stupid thing to get into, but you're. already in it. And then once it's done, we need to make sure the math works. versus the value of getting the car. Prefer- preferably if you're going to. get it, you get it in a cash by saving. up before then. At what point? What's. the lease? 3-year 4-year? Yes, 3-year. Okay. So, maybe we save up. enough to buy it out or save up to. enough to get a $15,000 car in cash, which will probably be just as nice at. that point as the car you have now uh.

once, you know, that time period ends. Either way, once you have those savings. done and the bad debt paid off, you can. just have fun and I highly encourage it. Go crazy. Well, not go crazy. Max 30%. But, one thing I need you to do is you. need to start investing. You're 25, so. I mean, you're young, but we need to. start saving up and investing because. now that they're fully custody, you. know, under you and stuff like that, we.

don't want them to have to be taken care. of you when you're in Nana's age versus. you'll be able to self-sustain, you'll. be able to fully retire, and you can. give back and all this stuff to them to. their kids and all this stuff. And it's. big happy family. Yeah. kids. Well, to their kids. No, I hope they. don't have kids. Oh, they're so young. You don't know what they're going to be. like as adults. Yeah, I mean, kids are. terrible and I can't stand the noise and. smell they make, but either way,

you will be set up and they won't have. to take care of you and that's is called. being a mature parent. And you've just. stumbled into this. So, I'm okay with. where you are uh in general having not. prepared much. You this all All has. landed in your lap and I respect the. out of you. You're doing incredible. things. We just need you to take control. of your financial situation now. And. you're going to be set well if you. actually do truly budget, never.

overspend in those categories, get that emergency fund, pay off this. personal loan, start investing 20% a. month a year to retirement, Okay. and. you'll be in a good place. Okay. What do you think? Yeah. I'm here for you. What's going to What's going to happen. with. the conversation with Nana and these. other adults that live in your house? We'll talk about it. We'll see where the. conversation goes. Cuz I I've tried to. have the conversation more than once. Um and I've tried to have the. conversation with them also. It just.

kind of gets ignored and shut down. Um and it's What's going to happen is. I'm going to be the bad guy. I'm going. to be the selfish person that doesn't. want to help her family. And that's. fine. That's okay. isn't doing enough. Um. And I'm not doing good enough in life. That's what's going to turn into. If they ever grow up, they'll see. But if they're not, who cares what little children think? And they're acting like little children. How do you feel about the cutting back. on all the daily coffees and everything.

like that? Oh, I don't care. Temporarily. Please. Please don't care. Oh well, I don't know. I don't know cuz. that stuff can become almost kind of. daily life addicting. Well, yeah. So, the coffee thing I know. it sounds stupid on your end. It's just. something I shared with a partner that. he also has a passion for. That's fine. And again, you can get. there soon, but just cut back on it now. Cut back on all the eating out. Cut back. on getting the water and all that stuff. when you Uh and like I said, I bought. the heating up lunch box. That was a big. deal because that was my issue. Like if. I wanted to Like you always tell people.

to pack a sandwich and I'm just like, I. literally can't. It's just going to. cause me to overeat. Even if I pack two. sandwiches and like double the lunch, it. does not do what I need it to do. And I'm like, "Ah, I'm going to go get. something." Like, "No.". Or and like if I if there's food at. home, like I'll try to go home and eat, but I can only do that if it's on my. route. Just make sure you pack lunch. packs snacks. working since I've been doing it. The. the lunchbox. It's I'm very excited. about the lunchbox. It's really cool. Um I I've I mean I've got to do it. multiple times now, so. Any final.

thoughts? No. Good. Hanging in there. Rocking out. For Mary, that's an incredibly. complicated situation and there's this. this is all about relationships and I. hope she's able to have some real. conversations with Nana and her older. brother and and I hope that they all. have a great life and. yeah, I hope everything goes well for. her. Hammer financial score spending. within a budget, three out of 10. She. certainly spends a lot every single day.

going out. So, if she can contain that, that'll drastically improve her life. Debt, four out of 10. I mean, that $800. personal loan, it's terrible, but it's. low. She can kill it pretty quickly. The. lease is something I would have not ever. gotten into or advised her to get into, but she did. It is what it is. Debt, four out of 10. Retirement, nothing, zero out of 10. Emergency fund, nothing, zero out of 10. Real estate, nothing, zero out of 10. So, that aggregates down. to a 1.5 out of 10 and I hope she. increases that and we'll have a.

follow-up and see if she has that fully. funded emergency fund and no more. personal loan in like 6 months or so. Make sure to check out all the resources. in the description below and do not. forget to follow my Instagram and. Twitter. Thanks.