She's Destroying Their Marriage | Financial Audit

We had a conversation, I got arrested. over it. >> She got you arrested? >> Yeah. >> Over having find my iPhone on? >> And she immediately called the cops? >> Yeah. >> Oh my. Check on me. >> Once again, his communication is. >> Okay, what are the issues then? >> He doesn't do anything that I ask him to. do. I try and try and try, and that's. the only way I get heard is if I lose my. mind. >> Why are you with her? >> The dynamic is good. >> Is it? You don't really seem to care, which is kind of crazy. Like I don't. know. Really, the only thing would it. would be like an ultimatum, her to leave.

you, but I don't think she cares enough. to leave. >> I don't think she could afford to. anyway, so. >> What are you trying to say? >> It's been 11 years and you haven't. figured it out now? >> Dollar wise is finally here, sending. waves through the personal finance. world. This is officially now the best. budgeting app on the market, and I'm. giving you a special deal to download. Get a free trial to test it out, and. then you get the monthly plan at a 33%. discount for the first 3 months, or the. annual plan at an insane discount. And. most people sign up for the annual. version cuz it saves a lot of money, and. you get my detailed 30-day meal plan.

signed by me mailed directly to you, plus the digital version of my cookbook. [music] for each recipe. Don't miss the. opportunity of a lifetime. Download. Dollar wise to start your free trial. Go. to dollarwise.com or click the link. below. I want you to be on the next episode of. Financial Audit right here in Austin, Texas. If you think you have interesting. finances with an interesting. personality, or a story, or a life, or. relationship, I will personally pay you. to take time off of work, fly you down. to Austin, get you personal. transportation, a hotel, food, and we'll. have a great time hanging out. Go to.

CalebHammer.com/apply or click that link. in the description below. >> Hi, I'm Taylor. I'm 35. >> I'm Cam, 34. We're from Central. Arkansas. >> And this is Financial Audit. >> Yes, it is. Thanks for coming over. Taylor, what do you do for a living in. that Central Arkansas? >> I work from home processing workers comp. claims, and uh. basically feel like a single mom living. there because he's gone all the time on. a boat. >> I work on a boat.

Uh uh. >> Oh, okay. Well, that would explain why. you're on a boat. >> Yeah. Yeah. Offshore, pretty much inland. >> I'm not asking you any questions, but. I'm glad you're excited to talk. I still need to know what you're making. Cuz you didn't let me answer that. You. immediately started talking about him. when I was just talking about you. Yes, and your job, the job that you work from. home. You made sure to clarify that you. work from home. >> I work part-time right now. I make like. From home? Yes. $400 every 2 weeks cuz, you know, being at home is overwhelming.

>> Is it? >> Yeah. >> [laughter]. >> No, maybe not just that, but everything. else, yes, definitely feel really. overwhelmed and all by myself. All the time. >> That was the right thing to do, Peter. >> I think I would also abandon the house. quite frequently if this is what it's. like at home. Okay, how how much part-time is. part-time? Cuz that's very part-time to.

only get 800 bucks a month. >> hours a week. So, $15 an hour. That's. >> So, something's really built up, hasn't. it? Cuz you're really just kind of. coming out of the gate with this. You didn't even let me ask what's going. on. You're just like You're like, "Oh. god, here's my chance to just be a. >> [laughter]. >> Okay. >> Yeah. I work a month. >> I'm going to guess you work 12-hour days. plus 18-hour days. Yeah, on a boat. >> Okay, Cam. Yeah, tell me about this.

boat. Go ahead and just say the stuff. you just said again. >> So, I work inland. We go like pretty much Texas to. Louisiana back and forth moving Doing. what? Moving like crude oil, pretty. much. >> Okay. What are you What are you What's. your job? >> a tankerman. I load and discharge barges. and. just went to. to get my pilot license. I'm working on. getting my pilot license right now. >> Really? >> Yeah, I'll be driving the boats instead.

of. >> Oh, that kind of pilot. Okay, I was. going to say I would not. appreciate if you walked on a plane um. that I was on and then piloted it. That's my credo, no regrets. >> Mhm. >> Okay, what do you make in this job? >> So, I don't make hourly, I make day rate. and my day rate is. 385 right now. >> Sure. So, what does that come down to. monthly? Your average month.

>> So, it's kind of. I work. >> Your average quarter? >> Well, okay, so I work. >> Average year. >> 28 days on, 14 days off. >> That's wonderful. What do you make? >> So, it changes every month. >> Great, that's why I said what how much a. year? >> A year? Roughly like 110,000. >> Wow, we're complaining about that. That's interesting. You know these. people that go when they go work on the. oil fields out in West Texas or those. that go work in the Gulf on the rig or. those that are.

you know out there working in the. fishing boats and doing things like he. does. You know, they make a lot of money. and the reason is is because yeah, a lot. of people don't want to be from home but. then they do it and they make a lot of. money and that's. that's what he's doing. >> Well, I definitely appreciate the money. but being home and working 24-hour. shifts with everything else that has to. be taken care of. >> How do you think money comes? Stop. smacking your lips. How do you think. money comes? >> I mean it has to come from somewhere. >> her lips. Do you have a drink of water? >> I do.

>> Let's consume a lot of that. Oh, he's even smacking it just like. smiling. That's crazy. Uh okay, great. I mean you're killing. it, dude. Is that what it's your account. on a yearly basis 110 or is that before. taxes? >> That's before taxes are taken out. >> are we going to say like 75 maybe? Okay, so. >> Yeah, 75-80. >> So. >> you're probably just averaging like. 62,000. or sorry, 6,250 bucks a month. Obviously, yes, up and down, I get it. So okay, I need to really need to. internalize this, maybe even like drop.

for myself cuz I'm a little. Break down your time away from home and. then time at home cuz clearly that is an. issue to this thing. >> So I work 28 days on the boat. >> Okay. >> 14 days at home. >> Love it. >> That's it, but I ride over. I ride over a lot. So like I'll do we. call them hitches. I'll do usually like. sometimes two hitches. So I'll be gone. for like 28 days, my 14 days off, and. another 28 days. >> You said stay at home mom, that sounds.

like children. >> I do have two children. >> Very good. Ages? >> Uh well, one's almost. >> Stop smacking your lips. What is. actually wrong with you? No, it's not. It's actually not. When I talk I go. before everything I say. >> I don't even notice that I'm doing it. >> Well, you're doing it. >> Well, I will try. Oh my god, I did it. again. Um one is almost 16, will be in. November. The other one. >> Did you make that one? >> No. >> Oh. Well, that's not his fault for having. this job. >> No, this the second one is though. She.

will be 10 in a few months. >> And you made that one? >> Yes. >> At 24? >> 25. >> You're 34? >> Originally. >> I'll be Okay, so her birthday's in. November. I'll be December. >> that's fine. Was he doing this job when. you had the 10-year-old? >> No. >> What was he doing? >> Working at AT&T as a call center. >> he had? >> [sighs]. >> That's hard. I. >> What job would you prefer he had?

What job. would you prefer he had? >> Oh, that's actually why the. >> Are you What are we doing? Bro literally. goes and grinds his ass for 28 days and. then he has to hear your bitching and. moaning about how he's not there for the. next 14 when he's home? >> Yeah, cuz he only has one job when he's. gone, the boat. I have 37 other things I. have to take care of by myself while. he's gone, not talking to me half the. time. >> So, the alternative is he can get a.

lower paying job at home. >> Yeah, but he doesn't want to do that. either. >> Do you want him to do that? >> He ain't going to listen to me. >> Doesn't matter. Do you want that? Given. the choice, do you want that? >> At this point it would be really hard, but yeah, I mean it would be nice to. have some help at home. >> With less money? >> Yeah, that would make it harder, so. >> With less money? >> No, I don't need less money. >> Okay, so. you are okay with it. [laughter and clears throat] then. This. is what you are choosing.

>> Not necessarily choosing, but. >> You want to live in both worlds. No, no, no. Because you're an impossible person to. work with. I already know people like. you. It's you're impossible. You want. him to make more money, but you want him. to have the job where he doesn't make as. much money. So that he can do all these things. >> because she thinks like I'm making one. day what she makes in two weeks. Pretty much. >> You're jealous? It's a jealousy thing? >> feel a little bit pointless. >> a jealousy thing? Well, yeah.

>> [laughter]. >> I mean you make $800 a month, yes. >> I mean she was full-time and then just. went part-time like recently and she's. looking at going back full-time. >> When she said said stay-at-home mom, I. thought she was like raising a couple. like two and three-year-olds. >> No. No, he's got to Dude, they're. basically a 10-year-old basically, so. it's so easy. >> care of themselves. >> They really do. They also they go to. school the vast majority of the year. >> I mean yeah, they have a lot of extra. curricular activities. There's no. programs. It's true Arkansas.

I mean not this. >> Send them to summer camp or. >> They're all Christian and I'm not really. about. >> That's also just not true. >> You can go to any summer camp anywhere. You guys make good money. You could fly. him to any summer camp you want to. They can go get touched by a. theater person and interlock him. >> they want to do that. >> [gasps]. >> Is it their choice? 16 year old don't. really care. 16 year old like yeah at. that point yeah dudes make that piece of. go get a job. >> Yeah. >> But like the 10 year old yeah send him.

to camp. I don't understand. What is. this stay at home mom thing at this. point? You're driving them to some. activities here and there? Okay great. that's wonderful. What? This is not a 3 year old. What. what are we talking about here? >> I mean there's a lot that goes into. being a parent. >> says there isn't but the way you're. making it sound like they're newborns. and he's just not there. >> No just a lot of responsibility that's. all on me that he's not doing. >> for the 16 year old though? >> I mean he has band that he.

We're talking about when school's in. session though. >> did band at 16 and I drove myself to. band. >> Well he hasn't gotten to that point yet. He's not 16 until November. So it's been. all I mean driving. >> 16? >> I said on. >> Well he he's at the house half the time. at 15. Like half the time he's at his. dad's house half the time he's at our. house. >> not to then he doesn't get to do all the. fun stuff. That is the part of growing. up and learning how to become an adult. in your late teens. >> I mean he has his permit and he drives. sometimes but in terms of. >> Then he then why would you drive him?

I'm confused why you're forced to drive. him. >> factor. It's like $300 a month. >> I don't really give a You guys. make really good money. You can do that. >> Well that hasn't been factored in yet. apparently. So that hasn't been an. important thing. >> actually like a stupid person so let me. help you. May I have the whiteboard? I I I think I need to like do a little. drawing for you. >> Okay. >> I'm not trying to be mean but actually I. kind of am. Um. Ooh nice fresh bread.

So, uh there are two options here. There's. uh. your income stays here. where you don't pay any car insurance, or you pay a little bit of car. insurance, and then instead of driving him around, your income goes all the way up cuz you. work like an adult. >> I mean. >> Also, I'm really confused because I grew. up. uh with more siblings than the household.

that you're in right now, and both my. parents worked full-time jobs, and we. did this 100% happily. >> Well, I I do also go to college. There's. that, so. >> You didn't tell me that. How the. would I assume that? I don't know you. I. don't know you. We're not friends. I. don't know you. >> My bad. I guess I should have brought. that up. >> Yes, context, things for me to know. would be good. So, tell me about your. college cuz that is good. That is good. I can appreciate college. I can I can do. that. >> going for a nutrition degree, um but I'm. doing it online with Purdue Global.

>> Why nutrition? You know, they make okay. money at some point, but it's a it's a. very competitive field. >> Right. Um. I've kind of gone the own my own. business route. I've trained a. >> you [laughter] suck. You're putting this. all on him who's actually going to make. you like work in a hard job making real. money, and you're honestly doing passion. projects. >> Mhm, yeah, pretty much. >> How the is this possibly his. problem? I wouldn't be going so hard on. you if not the first question I asked. you immediately try to throw him under. the boat. This is insane.

>> Well, I feel like it's more his fault. that we're in this position where. >> How possible Okay. >> [snorts]. >> How? Please, your turn. >> Well, because when I'm at home taking. care of everything, I'm not spending any. money except for on food. and on basics, on things that my kids. need. He's over there on the boat, scrolling his phone on his free time, buying whatever the hell he wants, and. doesn't tell me about it, spending. thousands of dollars, and then I look at.

the account and we have like, I don't. know, $150 left and three other bills. that we have to pay for. Like, that's. how is that my fault that he's just. spending it and not telling me anything? >> [snorts]. >> Cam, um. but it's not like big purchases all at. once. Uh I affirm a lot of stuff. So. >> Why are you doing this? At the point Well, >> I don't like to see the big numbers come. out the account, so I would rather have. like a bunch of little fragmented. charges here and there. >> Okay, so leave him. I don't know. What. do you want?

>> Sounds like he recognizes he's a piece. of. >> I don't know. I feel like money like. it's not real, you know, I'll get paid. again. >> Well, I think food and college paid for. and roof over the kids' houses, which. are paid for by money, are very real. >> I feel like college like I'm not going. to pay for my kids' college. >> You don't have to if you don't want to, but food and roof I would encourage. >> food I get that, but like. >> costs money. Utilities. >> But those those are money that's always. paid. Like I just like. >> you spend all your money on things you. don't need.

>> So how do the conversations go? >> I literally get paid and like a thousand. dollars will come out in payments, and. I'm just like, how am I supposed to pay. the bills when you have this much coming. out in payments that I had no idea that. was going to come out, and then I'm. trying to juggle everything by myself, and you're just on the boat having a. good old time. >> [snorts]. >> Mhm. >> Okay, so how do the conversations go in. this house then? Cuz clearly. there's a problem, and you both kind of. recognize it, but you have a big issue.

with it, and even though you recognize. it, you don't really seem to give a. So tell me how this is talked. about in this How does it go? >> I talk a whole lot, and he's like a wall. that doesn't say anything. >> I mean, if I make the money like you. know, I want something, I usually get it. at the end of the day. Like that's how. it's going to be. I've always been that. way. I want like. >> I mean like I didn't have a lot growing. up so like I want the kids to have you. know everything they want. Most of it like probably 90% of it is.

for the kids. >> But they probably enjoy you know not. having to worry about money every two. weeks too. >> Do they know? >> No, they don't know. >> they know that I can't go do certain. things that we usually like. not necessarily no no but they know that. I have to cut back when I do. I mean I have to cut back a lot. >> they enjoy doing the things we do. I. mean we'll go out you know take little. trips here and there and. >> We haven't taken a trip in a year. because you've spent too much money.

>> Went to Vegas. >> That was a year ago. >> I mean last September. >> A year ago. >> Basically a year ago buddy. >> Yeah but then also worked from January. to May straight like I mean like so I. have I'm not home so like how are we. going to take. trips if I'm not home? So like how are. we going to take trips if I'm not home? >> Or without money. >> Uh okay. Well what does it again? Okay. so you try to talk to them and then what. happens? >> He well if he's on the boat he's oh I. don't have service. Oh oh.

>> He might not have service. I mean I. don't I don't always have service like. >> He's on the water dude and even when he. does have service he might have to work. It's a. >> He just checks out. He will like. completely ignore the whole entire. conversation that I try to have. >> I mean some sometimes yeah sometimes. >> I understand I'm the boat. It's. different on the boat. I mean at home. >> We try but then he's always like oh I'm. only home for two weeks. I don't want to. deal with this when I'm home. >> And that is just being an adult. You do. have to grow the up. You might have.

to have the conversation then. >> You have to have it at some point. >> conversations over and over and it's. like we. have that conversation and I'm not going. to just keep going back to the same. conversation. >> Why do you think the same conversation. keeps happening over and over? >> Because she doesn't want to hear what I. have to say. >> Okay. Okay, that's great. What do you. have to say? Let's hear it now. Maybe. maybe [snorts] she'll listen. Maybe she. talks over you the whole time. I don't. know. I'm not going to let her talk. I.

am here. as the third party. What do you have to. say? What is your argument? What is the. reality? >> So I'm gone. a month. I come in for 2 weeks and I. don't want to have the same conversation. about you know, spending money or an. argument that we had. before I left out on the boat. It's like. I don't want to I don't I don't want to. argue with you because. >> Yeah, I don't. >> on. That's not an argument of the. argument itself. You're literally just. arguing you don't want to argue.

>> want to argue at all. >> No, but I feel so alone. Crazy. >> I mean I mean you have to get. >> Yeah, that means like I just don't want. to have confrontation. >> Yeah, but no adult conversations or help. with any kind of decisions whatsoever. cuz it's always so convenient that every. time I try to talk to him he's oh, doesn't have service conveniently. >> Okay, well that might actually be fair. That one I'm okay that one. >> For days? >> He's on the water. [screaming]. >> texts about other things, but he won't.

answer me. I'll be like what about that. text I sent 2 days ago? Nothing. >> Okay. >> Zip. >> Okay. Does she nag you 24 hours a day? >> No. I mean sometimes I'll go like 2 days. without talking to her. >> Because I was nagging. >> talking to her. I'm saying her to you. >> Yeah, I mean she'll text me all the. time, but not like really nagging. Like. just talking about like things going on. at the house, this and that. Um. >> So why the won't you talk to her. and. like I was going to be on your side if. she's nagging all the time and then. yeah, avoid your wife. That's what No.

one wants that. >> But if she's not nagging all the time. then yeah, deal with those as they pop. up. >> 6 hours on, 6 hours off, 6 hours on, 6. hours off. So I work 5:30 to let's say. noon. When I'm. >> Did you know that a text only takes. about 30 seconds? >> on lunch. So, like she can't talk. She's. doing her lunch And then, when I. get back on work at 5:30 at night, I get. off at midnight. Usually I'm in bed like. >> I got you, buddy, but I'm saying. >> I'm never in bed and I tell you you can.

text me even if I'm in bed. So, I don't. That's. >> if I don't have service, it's now 2:00. 3:00 in the morning. I'm not going to. sit there waiting to get service still I. try to answer and have a full-blown. conversation. >> Cuz it's just not worth it, obviously. You might be, you know, have an adult. conversation that might make you feel. some type of way, possibly. So, might as. well just not. >> I don't know. I'm just like to the point. where I'm like I just I'm going to crash. out at work and then like everybody's. going to hate me. So, like I would. rather just not deal with it, you know?

>> Is that Is that your only response? You. can't talk to someone? You just crash. out? >> ish. But, I mean I don't want to have the. conversation. Like I Like when she gets. to that point and I'd pretty much like. what happens is we get into argument and. I'm like I could just leave. Like I'll. go back to work then if like we're going. to continue to argue about this or like. I'll just work longer. >> if you actually went and talked? Cuz it. sounds like you avoid all talking.

You'll talk about the things at the. home. But, again, I was going to be on. your side if she's literally nagging all. day. Yeah, why would you ever approach. it? That's not a safe place to talk. But, the thing is if here and there. she's bringing up some things and the. vast majority of the conversations are. fine, then yes, it's your responsibility to. participate in the household. And threatening to leave is insane. Instead of talking? Brother, what are you on about? You're. 34. >> toddler.

>> I mean. >> Yeah. >> On the flip side, like it would help. like if maybe she worked full-time, you. know? Like there was options. >> Financially, sure, but if you spend all. your money, even if you make good money, it doesn't matter. Cuz you guys already. make really good money. >> We'll have even less time to talk if I'm. full time, so that would probably make. you happy. >> [snorts]. >> Well, yeah, that's why he wants you to. work full time. >> obviously. >> Yeah, yes, for sure. Okay. I mean, you're probably never going to. work full time cuz your business is like. I mean, it's like right? I mean, what?

>> I mean, >> have to go to college for that sort of. business. I don't What the are you. talking about? >> Like you said, it's a passion project. I. trained to be a doula, which I don't. even know if you know what that is. >> What? No, of course not. >> It's like doing like home births and. stuff. >> Yeah, so I want to work with like moms. and. >> Why aren't you doing nutrition then? >> Like charity work. >> For an extension of that, I want to. >> What? >> prepare stuff for them after they have. their babies or while they're super. duper pregnant. >> 10 years ago and you're still fat.

>> Yeah. >> So, how are you helping them? >> Well, I mean, I don't know what I preach. >> I mean, I do financially. That's why I. do the finance show. >> Well, you don't you don't cook at the. house either though, really. >> What? You're. You said you're What the You're a. part-time. worker who works at home and has to take. You just complained about having to take. care of the household that you don't. cook? >> Sometimes. When I'm not tired. >> Tired? You're tired cuz you're fat. I'm.

tired cuz I'm fat. >> Probably. >> Yes, nutritionist. Absolutely. Why he's. able to go work on a boat all the time. cuz he's not fat. >> Yeah. >> Sure, but that's not I mean, that's. that's an endless loop. If you're not. willing to be healthy because you're. tired, it'll make you even more tired. and blah blah blah blah blah. >> Well, I mean, you know, the whole the. whole the whole vicious cycle. Yeah, I. mean, I don't feel like doing it because. I don't do it and then it just keeps. going. >> Yes, but how can you sit here and. complain to me that you feel like a. single mother and you're doing all this. stuff at home all day if you literally. won't do pretty much the most basic.

single mother thing. I'm going to be. real with you. Your debt is not the same. as everyone else's. You've got your own. unique mix of credit cards, maybe some. medical bills, personal loans, and. collections. Whatever, your interest. rates are different. Your payments are. different. Your life is different. So, why do you need some one-size-fits-all. solution that treats you like a number? Some generic calculator that spits out. just pay more as if you hadn't thought. of that already. That's what sets PDS. apart. They don't just look at your. balance and say, "Good luck." They work. to understand your specific scenario and. help provide alternative solutions to.

becoming debt free. Whether you're. struggling with credit cards, personal. loans, collections, or medical bills, PDS debt has customized options designed. specifically for you. Not your neighbor, not some average case study, you. They've helped hundreds of thousands of. people get out of debt. And here's the. thing, there's no minimum credit score. required. They're not here to judge you. They're not here to shame you. They're. here to help you get out and help you. save more. Pay off your debt faster and. start putting money back in your pocket. This is a company that is A+ rated by. the Better Business Bureau, boasts. thousands of five-star reviews on. Google, and holds a five-star rating on.

Trustpilot. That legitimately matters. And here's the thing, if I needed help. paying off debt, this is exactly where. I'd go for help. You're just 30 seconds. away from being debt free with PDS debt. Get your free assessment and find the. best option for you right now at. pdsdebt.com/hammer. That is pdsdebt.com/hammer. pdsdebt.com/hammer. You suck with money, so you download a. budgeting app. You start with the. classic one, Mint app, but everyone just. deletes it because it's way too. complicated to use. So, you go to. EveryDollar. That's Dave Ramsey, the. personal finance guy, right? Well,

they're going to force you to use it his. way. That's not very personal [music]. finances. Rocket Money, that you got a. lot of commercials, but they're owned by. Rocket Mortgage. Guess what they want to. sell you in the end. Then there's the. new guy on the block, Monarch. Hundreds. of millions of dollars of private equity. raised in so far, but private equity. doesn't have the best track record when. it comes to private data. That's why I. like DollarWise. Bill Pay these people. just like you, poor people just like. you. No private equity, no gimmicks,

just the best budgeting app there is. Download it now, start the free trial. YNAB.com, link in the description below. >> Well, I guess because I'm a sad panda. because my husband's gone all the time, I don't want to do anything. I don't. want to keep doing everything myself. So. then, yeah, I kind of just get so burnt. out that I just shut down and don't do. anything at all. >> Like we buy all these groceries and. stuff and then they just go bad in the. fridge. Like and then they want to go eat out,

you know? >> How long have you been doing this job? >> Uh this job here, um. 2 and 1/2 years. >> How has the relationship changed since. you started this job? >> So I used to work on the road and then I. stopped doing all that cuz she wanted me. home and then we moved back to Arkansas. and I was making money. So the. whole dynamics of the relationship were. horrible. Um where? >> Yeah, have you guys seen what this. conversation's been like so far?

Continue. >> And um so there was just there's no. money. Like can't afford anything. I. mean we were staying in a town. population of 500 with her mom. Um and I. was working a a job. So like this. is the only out was to go work on the. road. >> how this job has affected your. relationship? >> I mean I would think it's helped a lot. >> Really? >> I mean as far as that goes. >> I don't think that we've been good for a. long time, obviously, because, you know, when we didn't have money, we fought.

about not having money. Now we fight. about having money and spending it all. So it's just, you know, whatever. situation we're in. >> this job affected your relationship? Taylor, you try. >> I. >> He clearly can't comprehend the. question. >> Well, no, he thinks it's better. >> affected our relationship. >> He thinks it's better cuz he doesn't. >> It's worse because he's never there. We. are never on the same page. We never. talk about anything. I have to deal with. my He has to deal with his. And.

that's just how it is because he won't. meet me in the middle ever about. anything. >> Why? Why no compromise? He has to. compromise in life. I compromise every. single day. >> What's there to compromise about? >> know. What Okay, what are the issues. then? >> The fact that he won't talk to me. The. fact that he keeps spending all the. money and won't tell me about it. It's. It's wrecked us. I don't know how he's. saying that it's better. Like we never. talk about Probably because he doesn't. hear me nagging him all the time. That's. probably why he thinks it's better. He's. not here all the time to hear me.

No, it's not better. >> Well, halfway would be spending at least. a bit less and trying to communicate in. some way whatsoever. That would be the halfway. But you're not even willing to do the. basic things. >> I mean, I communicate. I just don't It. always leads to like. argument about some Like I'm not. >> That's not a conversation. Like an adult conversation has feelings. sometimes that like might not feel very. comfortable for you. But you still have.

to do them. That's part of a family, Cam. >> So how does the How does the argument. go? What usually triggers it to turn. into an argument? Maybe we can navigate. this. Maybe we can make it so it doesn't. go into a full-blown heated explosion. >> I I don't have an argument. >> talks. I try to start it. >> I just want to know what Okay, you tried. to start what? What was the last topic? What was the last topic? >> All of the spending that comes out. >> tried to start. Tell me what you did. >> I.

said that I was upset. Can't have all of. the bills paid because like most of the. payments that he has that like the. payment plans, they come out as soon as. he gets paid. Like we have no access to. that money before those payments come. out. So I'll look on the day he gets. paid and there's like. 10, 15 different payments coming out. >> Fantastic. I asked you how you approach. the conversation. >> I approach it by trying to tell him all. of that. He doesn't agree, obviously. >> How? What was the situation? Did you sit.

him down or what? >> No, he's always gone. I try to text him. I send him all the screenshots, yes. >> And what did you say? >> I said, "What the is all of this?". >> Well, if you're opening a conversation. with what the is all this, no. does that ever result in something. positive, you. >> Maybe he should tell me first, and it. wouldn't start like that. >> sorry. Okay, well, you're a dumb then if. you're starting the conversation with. "What the is this?" [screaming] No. that doesn't result in anything. >> How else am I supposed to start it when. I don't have any money for anything.

else? >> out the word. >> Mhm. >> It's very conversational immediately. >> Yeah, that's my favorite word, though. >> Wow. >> how upset I am. I mean, obviously I have. a reason to be upset. >> Are we now confused anymore why he. doesn't respond? I'm not. >> No, because it's not always that. It's. just Well, honestly, I'm not. >> time it was. So, then what happened. after you're like, "What the is. this?". >> Well, I think you know. He didn't show. up. He wasn't there. >> No. No. >> Yeah, well, I mean, he's checked out all.

of the time emotionally. Like, he's just. not there. >> No If you're starting every. conversation with. >> Not every conversation, but every. conversation on payday, for sure. >> every conversation like that? >> At least majority. >> Yeah, and majority of them should be. checked out. That's not how you start a. conversation. That's not a healthy. conversation. That's not any kind of. communication. You say he doesn't. communicate, neither do you. >> Well, we've gotten to this point because. of him, so I don't know how to do it. Yeah. >> Okay, you're an equal part of it. If. you've been trying to correct it, but. you can't communicate properly, then.

you're also a part of the issue. And. tell me you don't spend any money, shut. the up. That's just never the case. What are we talking about here? >> Maybe he is the worst spender. pretty. >> Don't wear makeup, don't get my nails. done, I don't get my hair done. Really. can't afford it, but you know, I just. sit at home waiting. not waiting, but hoping that maybe I can. spend some money on me, but I feel too. guilty to because he's already spent all. of the free money that we have and I. have to use the money that we have on. bills. So I it's not like I can.

>> Cam, why are you with her? You guys. can't even talk. Why are you. with her? >> I am not I don't have emotional. conversations with anybody. >> You guys aren't looks matched? >> I mean. >> [laughter]. >> I mean you're a bit of a freak, don't. get me wrong, but like I mean. there's attractive women out there that. like freaks. Well. I mean I have a kid. So that's I mean. that's a big thing. >> do it. But you don't look like the. person that stays around for their kid.

>> He doesn't. [laughter]. >> Well, I mean my only option is what? To. work more? Like. >> Like why are you with her? Is it just the kid? Cuz you can't talk to her, man. If you can't talk to your woman, why are. you with your woman? >> He can't talk to anybody. Like it's not. going to be any different with anybody. else. >> Oh, is that true? So you can't have any. kind of conversation with anyone? So. >> No. No. >> Oh. Then you're a loser. >> Yeah, probably. But I'm not I just I. don't like emotional conversations. As a.

kid, I was forced to go to therapy and. all this and and I'm like I'm not. >> You're supposed to go to therapy as an. adult. You clearly need it, dude. >> Not doing that. >> You're not willing to try to get help. Not willing to try to become a better. person. Not willing to try to improve. your life in any way whatsoever, even. for the sake of your kids. >> I mean I have conversations with the. kids. Like that's not about money. >> They're not learning any kind of. emotional healthy habits from you. Look. at how y'all's relationship is. It's. >> Yeah.

>> How does it look in the household when. you're back? >> Good. I mean. >> Yeah? >> Yeah. >> Is it? >> I mean I do my best by myself, but I. mean. >> What? I said how does it look in the. household when he's back? >> Like look physically? >> I'm a. Y'all's relationship. >> I mean, as long as I don't try to nag. him about anything or any spending, then. it's okay. >> So, as long as you avoid the issue that. is damaging the house. >> a generic relationship, then it's okay. >> That is the opposite in every way of.

healthy. >> I mean, the only arguments we have is. about money. >> Yes, and it's the one thing that. obviously is causing a massive issue, but you're not willing to talk about it. And you come in way too heated. >> Probably. >> No. >> For obvious reasons. >> Not for obvious reasons. No, you can. still be upset about something and not. come in heated. >> I stopped nagging him after. you know, 2 years of him working here. >> So, it's been 2 years. >> for 11 years. >> Yeah. >> And. and it's always been that way. >> Why are you with her? I'm still confused.

on that. >> Cuz he's just as bad as I am. He spends. all the money even if we don't have it, and then I'm over here nagging about it. >> you don't contribute anything. financially to the house. So, like you. could take this money and go. Why why. are you with her? >> I mean, I literally have to be that way. for him to listen. >> I mean, I mean, as far as like being. uh. a cool person, I don't know. Like. the dynamic is good. >> Is it? >> No, it's not. It's when you avoid the.

things the dynamic is good. >> Yeah. >> Well, I guess it doesn't matter who I'm. with. >> When I pretend like everything is good. and I don't worry, it's good for you. >> You're into her? >> Well, yeah. >> Okay. Good. >> I mean, that. >> You love her? >> Yeah. >> Good. >> I mean, I don't know how to like show. affection or emotion. I didn't I never. grew up with having that. I grew didn't. have a father growing up. I was raised. by my mom. She was never there. >> how to hold someone's hand? Give. flowers? What? Go to therapy. >> Really? Really?

>> So, he doesn't show affection at all to. you? >> I mean, he does, but usually I'm. initiating it. I'm the one always but I. mean, yeah, sure. Probably am Naggy. He. doesn't do anything that I ask him to. do. I try and try and try and that's the. only way I get heard is if I lose my. mind. >> What the you want to ask if he. shows you affection? >> When I initiate it. okay, but there's. >> Like she'll she'll feel some type of way. about something. >> And then she'll cry about it and then.

tell me a million ways that I could go. about fixing the situation. >> Buddy, you got the jackpot. >> And I'm like. >> You're literally giving me the guide. book. >> I don't want to see you. >> Pause, pause, pause, pause. I want to. tell you what literally every woman in. the history of every relationship has. done. They will cry about an issue, but. they won't give you any ability to solve. it. She's giving you a. rule book. >> A novel. A novel. >> always cry about emotions and it's never. factual in the real world. That's what.

women do. That's what they do in. relationships. Welcome to. estrogen or something, I don't know. She's giving you the list. What? Every. man would kill for that. >> Not him, apparently. >> You're just a loser then, dude. I don't. know I don't know what to do for you. If. she's giving you the checklist. of everything you could just do. >> Like you don't have to necessarily agree. with everything, but the. checklist? >> And just no, he's too good for that. >> Hey, I don't feel like it's that bad.

It's. >> What's not that bad? >> What's not that bad cuz it's. >> It's not bad for you. >> Yeah, because she doesn't talk. Because. she doesn't talk. Do you not understand. that? It's not bad to you cuz she. doesn't bring anything up anymore. Especially when you're home. To try to. make the time you're home pleasant, but. you're not addressing any issue that has. been building for years. >> Years. >> That's the. >> Yeah. >> How frequently? when you're home? >> Um.

maybe like four or five times, depending. >> So, a few times a week? >> Yeah. >> Okay. So, I mean I mean the affection. part on like the intimacy part's fine. That's good. What's the affection part. that he's not delivering? >> I'm really just talking about intimacy, like cuddling with me. >> Okay. >> Having emotional conversations. I I. which I do talk a lot. I. >> Is that is are those the two things you. need? >> Yes. >> That's it? >> Yes. >> So, okay. Okay. Okay. >> Like an actual real adult conversation.

when. >> over talker, over sharer, and it's just. like we have a discussion that leads to. a million other discussions, and I'm. like I don't want to hear all that. >> But as you can imagine, I'm afraid of. being misunderstood because he never. listens to me anyway, so yeah. I find. every single way to try to explain. myself. >> Well, he either checks out when he's on. the boat or he. Yeah, I mean he doesn't. >> thing I'm not like freaking out about, but. >> Well, we I'm just saying. >> in person. >> He doesn't listen? >> No. >> What does What do you mean by that in. person? >> and not say a word. He will let me talk.

to him for an hour trying to give every. every checklist of things that needs to. be taken care of, and he will not say a. word. He will sit there and not say a. word. >> Would you want to get talked to for an. hour straight and then be expected to. kiss and hold somebody? >> Oh, no. I wouldn't say you guys have to. like diddle afterwards, but like. >> Maybe wouldn't go an hour straight if. you. >> contributed a little bit in it, and like. just said a couple times, "Yeah, you're. right. I'm sorry." Even if you're not,

cuz that's again what we have to do as. men. >> Groundbreaking. >> What do you think about what she just. said, Cam? Cuz yeah, I mean. >> I mean I probably I definitely you know. have issues when it comes to anything. emotional, but it's just. >> Emotional? She's sitting there and. talking. >> who I am. I've never been that way. It's. been 11 years, and you haven't figured. it out now? >> He was a little bit more that way, but. he's a little bit less now. A lot less. >> It's gotten worse.

>> I think so. >> Why do you think it's gotten worse, Cam? >> Uh. I don't know. Like I've been I'm gone. more um and then I come home and it's. >> When he's home. >> That's not. It's unfair, but you still have to step. up and just be an adult. A partner, a. father. >> At least every other trip home. Like. >> I'm a practical person. Like I I I hate. I hate having like theoretical. conversations like we could do this or. change this and like. >> What? Brainstorming and trying to figure. out how to better our lives is not a bad.

thing. >> Yeah, but if it's if it's practical, if. it's obtainable, >> Everything is practical when it's for. your family. >> No, it's not. >> Yes. Conversations are mandatory. >> Yes, I I I'll go with you there. But not not everything is practical if. it has to do with your family. Uh but. again, okay, theoretical. So okay, what. did she rant at you for an hour last. time? She thinks you don't listen. Let's. figure out if you do. What What was the. last rant she was giving to you? Shut.

the up. What was the last rant? >> She wanted me to hold her. That was it. >> An hour of I want you to hold me? >> Yeah. And crying and telling me that. >> Okay, what did he miss? >> What did he miss? Um. >> If anything, or did he actually Was that. it? Was it an hour of I needed you to. hold me? I needed you to hold me? I. needed you to hold me? I needed you to. hold me? >> I had I had migraines. I've asked him at least three times to. help me out, rub my neck, so maybe I. could feel a little bit better. Didn't.

want to do that, ignoring me. I'm like, well, can you at least just. >> She has migraines? That's crazy. What's. wrong with you? >> He doesn't want to take care of me. >> She has migraines every other day. >> out by me because I might throw up every. once in a while. He doesn't want. anything to do with me, and all I want. him to do is just lay there for a little. bit, maybe rub my neck, and then you can. do whatever the hell you want. I just. want to be taken care of every once in a. while, especially when I feel bad. >> She has migraines every day every other. day. Anytime we go anywhere, we're in a. car for more than a couple hours, we.

have migraines. >> Like that's my fault, though. >> Are you medicating? >> No. >> Not regularly. Like it's when needed. But like. yesterday, you didn't bring the stuff. you need. >> Excedrin, though. >> That doesn't work. >> Yeah, I forgot my stuff on the trip. >> You got to be there for her when she's. feeling sick. And I understand maybe it. feels like a ton. Maybe you need to. go to the doctor and see if there's. something you can take daily. >> Well, if I could afford to go to the. doctor, I would. But all the money is.

gone by the I can't I should be able to. >> I mean the. >> But I can't spend money on myself ever. or, you know, the kids might go without. food. >> What'd you spend last month? >> I don't know. >> He has no idea. >> look at the money at all? >> The balance. >> He has no idea what the balance is. >> what? >> The accounts. >> What account? >> The bank account. >> Any of them? >> If there's money left, he's just going. to spend it. >> was spent last month? >> I honestly don't know either because he. keeps making payments on. >> you be angry at Well, yeah, but you.

should be able to track that. >> I don't ever know what's going to be. coming out and what's not. From month to. month, he might pay one off, he might. get three more payments on Affirm or. whatever the hell. >> It was 8,000. Which was you guys combined I mean his. payroll, it was a higher month, so it. technically made it, but. definitely nothing left to show extra. >> Ever. >> So do you see where you missed it, though? You said all that was said is. that you want she wants you to hold her.

But clearly there was more involved with. the migraine, wanting to feel a little. better about that. And you won't even step up and What does. he do at home then? In the 14 days he's there, what does he. look at What does he do? >> of Clans. >> Out of everything? >> I mean, that's mainly what he does. >> Like I'll do little chores and stuff. around the house, >> [snorts]. >> but I mean, what's there really to do? Like. >> I play better games. Our house is I play. World of Warcraft. >> Okay. Okay. There we go. Oh, he's doing. something more productive. >> But then, [clears throat] I don't. normally I only play that like twice.

when I'm home because, you know, like. the kids want to do stuff like. >> with your phone games. >> Like 24/7. I try to do things. I mean, we play Xbox games and stuff. >> Together? >> With the kids. When you're not petting. her like she's requesting. Weird way to say. What are you doing? What's he doing? >> On his phone. >> What are you What are you doing on your. phone? Give me your phone. And why do you look like this, by the. way? Open it.

What are you What are you Are you. stupid? Are you stupid little What are. you What are you No, what are you What. am I going to do with that a locked. phone, you piece of Yeah, Clash of. Clans is literally the only thing on the. main screen. >> No, then you got to swipe the other. direction. >> I know. I said the home screen. >> No, that's not the home screen. I don't. know why it was swiped to that page. >> Probably because you're playing Clash of. Clans. What do you, you know. Why do you look like that? >> Like what? I don't understand what. you're getting at. Like.

>> Your teeth and. >> The teeth? I had horrible teeth, so I. wanted to fix them, and I was like, "If. I'm going to spend this much money, I'm. going to let everybody know.". Like I live in Arkansas. Everybody has. up teeth and bunch of meth heads. running around, so I don't know. >> could have fixed that. >> It was It was about the same price. >> But why you look like that? >> Cuz then it's like, "Hey, I don't have. up teeth. Look at me.". >> I mean, you kind of do.

>> [laughter]. >> Not really. >> of opinion. >> You like them? >> I mean, I didn't at first. I've kind of. gotten used to them. >> Well, used to is different. >> Yeah. >> Okay, so let's see. Last week Well, you're What's the are you doing on. Facebook for 15 hours? >> It's real. >> And then I'd like whenever I'm like I. don't have service, it'll be open, but. there'll be like nothing loaded. So like. I just might have my phone sitting. there. I fall asleep and it's just that. has the app open cuz I don't have it set.

to auto lock. >> Miraculously, he has service for. Facebook. >> No, just because the app's open doesn't. mean there's anything popping up on it. >> But 15 hours? >> Yeah, I put my phone down, I fell. asleep, and the app was left open. >> But you only sleep for like 4 to 5. hours. >> Okay, guys. Clash of Clans Oh, that's a new game I. started. >> Yeah, you played that like crazy last. week. A lot of YouTube, Maps, Apple. Maps. >> How do you get. >> I leave that open 24/7 if I'm in a car. >> Okay. We have Safari, Messenger, and.

then Clash of Clans, Phone, Message. uh X. Um I mean, yeah. I mean, it's a lot of. time, for sure. It's an average of 9. hours 53 minutes a day. So I mean, that's that's a lot of phone. use. Don't get me wrong. And it looks. pretty much similar week over week. I. mean, you were pretty heavy on Reddit a. couple weeks ago. You must have really. been on the phone that That was an. average of almost 13 hours a day. Jeez. And Snapchat, who are you snapping? >> One person. >> Who? >> My buddy uh.

>> [snorts]. >> He's like in a weird relationship right. now, so we've been talking back and. forth. >> Who's Christina? >> Uh girl I used to go to school with. Well, she's was home schooled, but. >> Why are you snapping her? >> It was like one message. >> Convenient that it's Snapchat, though. >> Why are you messaging her? Yeah, you. guys saved one Snap in there. But why are you talking to her? >> I like check in with people every now. and then. Like one message, like I.

probably only talked to her like twice. in a year. >> I'm so glad you check in with other. people. >> Well, who's Bobby? >> Uh girl I used to work with. She. >> you snapping with her? >> Okay, so a lot of people don't have. social media. other than Snapchat. So, the only. >> What? >> Yeah, like I don't know why, but like a. lot of people don't post anything on. Facebook, don't post anything on. anything other than like Snapchat. So, like she posted something like she's. getting her RN. Um so, she had testing.

So, I was just like, oh good luck. I don't even really use Snapchat. Half. of it's. >> Deidra, Deidra, and Babydeth, Babith. >> Yeah, I don't Like I said, I don't. really use Snapchat other than. >> do. You objectively do. What are you. talking about? >> It's all right here. >> Yeah. >> What What are you on about? Yes, you. actually do. >> If you or your child spent years growing. up on social media and experienced.

serious mental health struggles, you. should hear this. Recently, a jury. ordered Meta and YouTube to pay millions. for their role in designing and. promoting addictive platforms. They knew. their apps could contribute to anxiety, depression, and body image issues, but. did not share those risks while. prioritizing profits. The recent. historic verdict underscores the. consequences of those decisions. Now, Morgan and Morgan is stepping up to hold. these platforms accountable for the harm. they caused. Click the link in my bio to.

take a short quiz. You may be entitled. to a potential recovery of over $1,000. Ladies and gentlemen, I got something. new to help you that we have personally. built right here on calebhammer.com. We have new Caleb Hammer financial. resources. They are the ones I would. personally use, which is why we made. them for you to use. As you've already. heard me talk about, personal loans are. okay when you're good at debt. I. personally use them when I can leverage. them for a situation. So we have good. personal loans on CalebHammer.com. We.

also have auto insurance now. You can. check for free and see if you can save a. ton of money on auto insurance. Remember, none of this actually matters. if you continue the same bad behavior. So it's not for you if you still suck. But if you've proved you can budget, check out these programs from personal. loans to car insurance to see if you can. save a ton of money across the. board. Go to CalebHammer.com or the. Caleb Hammer Financial Resources part of. the pink comment or description below. and save a ton of money. What do. you How do you feel about that? That's a.

That would weird me out a little. >> It weirds me out a little bit and I. can't see what's been talked about. So I. just have to take his word for it. >> And do you? >> I don't know what else to do. There's. nowhere to dig on Snapchat, so. >> Yeah, I guess not. Okay, very big into weed, aren't you? >> I mean, I I used to be, but. >> So weed and Pokemon. Yeah, weed Pokemon. weed Pokemon. >> I can't smoke weed anymore with my job, so. it's just I used to follow.

>> Dreaming? >> Yeah. It's just. >> That's pretty interesting. And do you Do. you Do you take his word? Cuz I mean, listen, I I I don't I don't. I can't say here if he's doing something. bad. It's not about that. But it's more. like, okay, he's not responding to you. while he's on the boat, but he's. snapping these women. >> I've definitely had those thoughts. >> Thoughts? But you've never brought it. up. >> Mm. Ish. >> What if he thought? >> I've told him that Well, I don't know. Hinted at the fact that maybe there's.

somebody else. I don't know because he's. he's so checked out all the time. I. don't know what else I mean, I don't know. He's gone for forever, so. I don't know what the hell he does when. he's gone. >> You've never done anything with anyone. in the last 11 years? >> No. >> Very goony X account, but. >> Yeah, X X's, but. >> Oh, it's based on you what you consume, my friend. That's how the algorithm works. >> Wow. >> Crazy. >> you engage with. >> Instagram's just as bad, too, so. >> That's again, you, not Instagram.

[laughter]. >> [gasps]. >> I'm on a boat for a month. >> Let me see your Instagram. I want to get into these finances. You snap her? >> I don't even have Snapchat. >> Just have the other women. That's weird. Okay. Okay. Oh, it is. Oh, it is. Oh, wow, it is. Wow, it is. All. attractive women.

>> That is being followed in stories and. engaging. It's Oh, yep. Oh, yeah. Yep, mhm. >> Yeah. >> Now, [snorts] how do you feel about. that? >> Don't like it. >> That's right. Okay, at least he's not really doing. much in here. >> A lot of it's just spam. >> Yeah, I mean, you have messaged a few. women, but. no extensive conversations. Lots of. Instagram users.

Like they Like most of them are deleted. I think you're getting like. Like did you follow this. >> Like go to like who I follow, like to I. like my actual page and it's like 5,000. people or some Like it's. >> attractive women. Okay, whatever. I don't know. I'd feel insecure, personally. I'm just saying that. >> Yeah. >> Especially if he's gone all the time and. not responding to you. >> Yeah. I can't imagine why anybody would have. an issue with that. >> But you've never brought it up. >> No, never. >> Why? >> I mean, well,

I did a long time ago, but I don't I. I think that I mean, maybe partly I've. checked out, too. I don't feel like. there's any point. Like why if you're. 400 other times that I've tried to talk. to you about any other problems that. we've had, I'm not listened to. >> That's true. So, what now? Do just give. up? >> Sometimes. >> you give up a stay. >> Yeah. >> I mean, if I wanted to do something, it. wouldn't be hard. I'm not actively. trying to like go. do anything or see anybody.

>> You've never exchanged nudes. >> No. >> Ah. I with I don't know with that. Snapchat thing, that's too hard to. believe. And you definitely called DMing. a couple women on Instagram. It was like. a year ago, but still. Um okay. Well, the other way. What do. you guys think your financial score is. today? Zero being the worst, 10 being. the best. >> I'm going to guess a three. >> Five. >> Why do you think a five? >> Maybe four. I own a house. I mean, I pay. my bills.

>> Do you? Would you know? >> Yeah. I mean, I wouldn't have utilities, right? I mean, building there for a third of. the month. >> All right. If you want your hammer. financial score, it's been retweaked, it's been redeveloped. It's incredible. It's much more thorough now. Check it. out in each category. It is free. Calebhammer.com. Go ahead and get that. Just takes a few minutes. And if you. don't want to be like a guy who ends up. on the show, you can actually answer. questions about your finances because. you'll put everything automatically into. Dollar wise. The budgeting app we made. for the average American instead of that. over complicated where you stop.

even using after a week. So, check it. out. Get a free trial dollarwise.com or. just download the app. Take the annual. version if you like it. Most people do. because it saves nearly 50% on your. money and you get the physical version. of my 30-day meal plan signed by me. mailed directly to you and the digital. version of the cookbook as well. So, check that out. All right. Let's get. into. Let's get into a little bit of the. a little bit of the money. We got a lot. of bit of money to go through here. That's clearly the big disagreement in. this relationship anyway. It's kind of.

it's tearing her apart. And you don't. really seem to care, which is kind of. crazy. Like, I don't know. how do I get someone to care? It's. difficult. Really, the only thing would. it would be like an ultimatum her to. leave you, but I don't think she cares. enough to leave. She is just willing to. give up and just put everything into. calories, so I don't know. >> I don't think she could afford to. anyway, so. >> No, I don't know. Okay, that's probably not what she wants. to hear. >> I mean, is that the only reason you want. me to stay with you? >> What? Not to stay She He's literally. saying you can't leave.

>> Which is what Is that what he wants my. only reason to be with him to be? >> you're saying. >> Yeah. >> I mean, I'm not home half the time. anyway. >> So, you do. >> if you can't leave If you're looking at. it like that, you're pretty much. >> What are you trying to say? >> Like if you wanted to. leave If you did want to leave me, it's. not like I'm home that much anyway. >> You wouldn't care if she leaves. Is that. what you're saying? >> care, but I'm saying like if I'm If I. work and I'm gone all the time, it's. pretty much like you're at home single.

anyway. Like it wouldn't be that much of. a difference if you wanted to leave. >> How does that make you feel? >> Like he is emotionally stunted and has. no feelings whatsoever. >> What she going to put up with it for. another 11 years? >> Mhm. [sighs]. Well, my kid's nine, so. >> Why did you say 10? >> Or 10. >> Why am I having to change the ages? >> almost. I'm sorry. I'm bad about that. >> ages. >> That's That's It's close enough. >> No, just like how old are they? And then. that's the answer. You're stupid. >> Well,

it's how I do things. >> have been cooking him right there, but. you just had to be. Okay, you have a payday loan. >> A couple. >> A couple. >> You make 110,000 hours a year. Why do. you have a payday loan at 688%. interest while you make 110,000 hours a. year? What the is wrong with you. possibly? >> That's like a $1,000 loan. >> That's not the point. It's the interest. >> I was going to pay that off like.

next payday. >> It's the interest rate. Why are you. having to take this out in the first. place? You make good money. >> So, I didn't get paid for like a month. because I got off work and I went to. school for my license for my pilot. license. So, I that was like 18 days or. something like that. So, I didn't get. paid for a full month. So, it was just. kind of to like balance everything until. I got back to work. >> Well, why the payday loan? You with your. income, you could qualify for a good. personal loan.

>> I've never really tried. >> Why do you immediately go to a payday. loan? >> I just go on Credit Karma and the first. thing that pops up. >> What? Dude, listen. Again, it's not for. everyone. I wouldn't recommend it for. people like you, but for people like me, people that can manage their debt. Like. on CalebHammer.com, we have these. financial services that we're building. out and stuff. And we have personal. loans for people to that can apply. And. there's like 0% interest rate period. loans and. This is at 688%.

>> Make it make sense. >> My credit though like prevents me from. doing a lot of those. >> Well, why would you have bad credit? That makes no sense with your income. There's no reason you should be going to. do a bad credit situation. You borrowed. $800. You have to pay back a total of. $4,475. >> It's a lot. Why? >> Where did it go? Did she even know about this? >> No. >> So, he did this behind your back?

>> Every time he does it behind my back. Every time. >> the money go? >> So, it went to them at the house. Like they. needed money in the account. I hadn't. got paid yet. So, I just made sure. there's money in the account for. whatever they need. So, I don't know. what it got spent on, but it got spent. >> food. >> took this out. >> Yeah, cuz I just went to school for my. license. >> $203 and 30 No, it's every other. >> Like that one I plan on paying the. >> I'm glad you plan on, but will you?

Because every time someone. >> That one for sure. >> time someone takes. >> out a personal loan and they plan to do. it, they never do. Or a payday loan. >> As long as not most of the paychecks not. gone from your other payments. >> the first one I plan on paying back. because it was super easy to do. >> so. Uh okay, at $407. a month if you don't. You have to pay. half the balance. But. >> why wouldn't I just pay it all off? >> I agree, why wouldn't you? You're the. person that enough to take out one of. these in the first place, so you're the. person that enough to not pay it off.

So, I can't trust you to pay it off. You're someone that is taking out a 700%. interest rate loan. Someone who's willing to do that is. enough not to pay you. You. When did you learn about this? This it. now? >> I mean, I've pretty much given up on. which ones are which because I keep. trying to ask, "How much do we have. left? What payments do you" He doesn't. even know. He doesn't know what he has. So, yeah. I mean, I I don't know which. one that would be for, so yeah, I didn't.

>> So, what's your perspective on this? This is crazy. >> Overwhelming. I don't know It's There's. so much that I don't even know where to. start. >> a man and made a child with someone that. is taking out 800% interest rate payday. loans behind your back. What the. Also, another reason why you might not. pay this off immediately, you have bad. credit score already, meaning you suck. with this So, why the would I. trust you to do it? Look at your teeth. >> You only need credit if you're buying.

but I'm trying to boost it anyway. Like that's. >> trying to buy. >> Yeah. >> How much did those cost? >> The teeth? >> Yeah. >> I made payments on a lot of it. Um. It's still got a lot of work to do, but. >> more? >> Maybe 30,000. 25,000. >> For what? Golding everything? >> All crowns. >> How for your teeth? Your bottom row doesn't look insane from. here, a little crooked, but not like. >> Yeah, but I'm going to have to get.

crowns on them. >> Why? >> Why not? I've already started. I look. kind of. >> root canals? >> Huh? >> Do they need root canals? >> No. Everything else is just cosmetic. other than the implant I need. >> You're going to prioritize 30,000 hours. of cosmetic things for your mouth. instead of paying for your kids' school. >> Anybody You can go get a loan for. school. That's what every kid does. Like, why am I going to pay for my kids'. college? >> Uh setting them up for an easier chance. of success. >> you, you know, get a vehicle or get an. apartment or, you know, do other things,

but when it comes to your school fund, you're going to pay for that. >> Well, how about this? $30,000 for your. teeth instead of $30,000 into a kid's. trumpet account growing. tax advantaged. in the S&P 500. They could use that. money for anything. A down payment on a. house. Imagine your kids getting a down. payment on their house in their 20s. >> And not having to work. >> Wildly different. It's not about not. having to work, but you're giving them. an advantage in a system that's already. kind of hard to get a house. But. instead, you're prioritizing you getting.

gold teeth. Do you not see the. disconnect? Selfish. It's all about you. >> Maybe they wouldn't have to spend 11. years trying to get to the point of. spending way too much money on. themselves. >> And maybe you could get her Ozempic. >> Maybe. >> That's like $50 a month. >> Exactly, but you're prioritizing $30,000. for your mouth. >> it. >> She can't get mascara. She can't get. that. >> I have good health care. I'm pretty sure. it's probably covered by insurance. >> Yeah. >> Health insurance. >> But you still have to pay for. everything. >> and if you go to like their little.

Ochsner or whatever, it's like 100%. covered. >> We don't live in Louisiana. >> True. >> to pay for. >> What the are you saying, dude? >> My company, when it comes to health. care, will 100% pay for everything. >> In Louisiana. >> teeth? >> That's not cosmetic. >> See, that. >> In Louisiana. >> Yeah, she doesn't live in Louisiana. >> It's like 4 hours away. >> Wait, 4 hours isn't nothing. >> Like I'm just going to drive there every. week for a doctor's appointment.

>> Why would you be going to the doctor. every week? >> Well, however much you have to go. >> I don't know. I don't know what you guys. are talking about. You can get Ozempic. online. >> Oh. >> There you go. >> Well, I mean, it costs money. You're. prioritizing your cosmetic teeth. >> It's a bad idea anyway. I wouldn't. recommend anybody to use it, but. >> Why? >> She's going to die before you. >> At this point. >> Well, yeah. You probably like 20 years. >> And with the amount of stress you put on. me, too. >> Okay, shut the up. What stress? You're just not having conversations. >> Well, yeah. I mean, that's stressful.

>> It's Well, yeah. Oh, yeah. Well, yeah. Selfish. Another one for you. This one, uh, Vviva. Okay. $3,083.90. with a bi-weekly payment of $89.81. What's this for? >> Um, that was to pay off some debt. >> Consolidation. >> That's what I was trying to do. >> is another example of why I don't think. you're actually going to pay off the. payday loan. The thing is,

consolidation's fine, bankruptcy's fine, personal loans are fine, credit card. transfers are fine. Not if you don't. change your behavior first, because then. it's not a tool, it's a weapon. >> So, I tried to take that one out to pay. off all the others. That way we only had. one payment. >> off the payday loan. You have no. no ability to convince me that you're. able to do anything based on your. history. You're not good at this stuff. You're not good at this stuff. This. isn't for you.

>> Very true. He's. never been good at money our entire. relationship, so I don't know why I. expected it to be better when he was. making more money. >> What was even the point of the. consolidation? It's at a 31% interest. rate. That's a credit card. What what what did you even get of this. consolidation? >> He has no idea. >> I paid off a bunch of things. >> pay off anything. You moved the debt. >> Yeah, I moved that around. >> And then you built the other debt up. again. That's what happens every time. You damaged yourself. It was a weapon. against you. It wasn't a tool for your.

benefit. >> I was trying to get the credit cards. down. >> And you didn't. >> But you put it basically on another. credit card. If we're comparing the. interest rate, it might even be worse. with how low the payment is. And then you built the credit cards back. >> Cuz you didn't change behavior, Cam. >> So is it better to pay them off. individually or just. >> Yeah. >> one big loan and pay it all off in one. >> do the big loan, not with that kind of. interest rate, but only if you change. your behavior because again, you have. this much in credit card debt, this much. in personal loans, then you put it on a.

personal loan, and now your credit cards. are here, right? But since there's the. ability to spend on those credit cards, you spend on it. Now you have double the. debt. That's what happens if you don't. change your behavior. Again, I love the. personal loan services we have on. CalebHammer.com, the car insurance, and. all that good stuff we're that we're. building building out, okay? It's all. there. For people out there, for people. like me. Not for people like you because you. can't. control yourself. You didn't change your. behavior. How and then Fortiva? Retail credit Again, this is him. He.

It's been him the last few times. What. the He won't talk to you just cuz Is he. just a bad person? Is he just a bad. person? Like what are we doing? I mean, I I don't know. >> Part of the time I wonder because, you. know, I. I've wondered if he's running around. when he doesn't talk to me or when he. doesn't want to have solid. conversations. So, you know, with our. phones, the iPhones, I would try to see. where he was at. Like. >> Oh, you have his location? >> Yeah, the Find My iPhone. So, I.

>> I I turned it off. >> Why? >> I've had it off for years. >> Why? >> Because I worked on the road, and the. problem I had was it was a horrible job. like I'm working now and I'd work sun up. to sun down. I was doing solar or. factory. >> Getting there. So. >> Okay. >> Anyway, I get off work and the only. place to go eat, you know, would be like. a bar or something whatever. I'm just. going to get food. I go back to my. apartment and I would just fall asleep.

Well, she's wanting to have these. conversations and talk. >> Again, literally would be off for hours. and wouldn't say a word to me and you. would just show up at our apartment. >> have Find My iPhone on, you can ping the. phone and it'll go off until you turn it. off. So, if I didn't message her back, she would just keep hitting pinging my. phone. >> Imagine if he didn't turn it off then. >> And I. I told her Mike the last time. >> right now. I have her location. You know. why? Not so I can talk Oh, she has to.

talk to me. No, I'm just I want to make. sure if like I'm she doesn't get into. like a car crash. It's scary. >> Well, yeah. I mean, I that's why we had. it. But when I'm looking and all he is. is at the bar and not talking. >> And but you're just pinging him. >> And he's supposed to be a parent. >> because he's probably cheating on me. He's at a bar. >> [screaming]. >> So, I told her last time, if you ping my. phone again, I'm turning this off. and I'm never turning it back on. Well, the beginning of the year, I was.

like, you know what? We had Yeah, we had. a conversation. I said, if I turn it. back on, you know, we'll see how it. goes. Not even week couple weeks later, I got arrested over it. >> god. It was so much longer than that. >> she got you arrested? >> Yeah. Over having Find My iPhone on. Essentially. >> Someone tell me. This makes no sense. >> So, I went to a friend's house and she. just assumed whatever while I was at a. friend's house a couple hours away.

>> again, his communication is. >> So, I left his house and I had a. migraine, so I pulled over. I never have. a migraine, ever. So, I pulled over at a. grocery store and I was sitting in the. car. and I have a Oura Ring and like I even. like track this out. I wasn't even. asleep for 2 hours. I didn't respond to. her for 2 hours and she called a welfare. check on me. >> Cops rolled up and immediately they. looked at me and arrested me and tried.

to give me a DUI. >> It was twice that long and he had told. me previously that he was on his way. home. So, 3 hours after he was supposed. to, you know, be getting close to home. now, I look and see that he's still 2. and 1/2 hours away. What the hell? >> at a grocery store. >> I tried calling him. Didn't ping him. Didn't ping him, but I knew where he. was, so yeah. >> So, she calls the grocery store. >> something wrong because he's lying to. me. You're a helicopter wife. >> I literally.

was afraid that something was wrong. >> afraid that something was wrong because. he literally. >> What time was it? >> said he was. >> It was like 3:00 in the evening. >> No, it wasn't. He was supposed to. already be home and like for a while. before I started freaking out. >> My daughter gets home at 4:00. She. wanted me home around when the time my. daughter got home. It was like 3:00 in. the. >> you let her have. access again in a long time, right? >> Oh, yeah. >> And she immediately called the cops? >> Yeah. >> Oh my. No he's never going to give. access. Did they arrest you?

>> Yeah, I went to jail. >> That was not the plan. I literally. called a welfare check and said that. there's something wrong because he's not. answering me. >> And like I have a federal license. Like. they tried to give me a DUI. If I get a. DUI, I'll lose my job. Done. Over with. >> So, um they arrested me on the spot. They I cuz I threw up outside the car. So, he pulled up. He's like, >> Cuz of migraine? >> Yeah, he said you. um like I want to talk to you, you know, step out the car, you know. So, I step. out of the car. He said, "Put your hands.

behind your back. You're under arrest.". I said, "What the for? He said, you're drunk. I said, no, I'm not. And. he said. >> for a breathalyzer? >> Well, they wouldn't do it there. They. didn't do a sobriety check, nothing. They arrested me, put me in the car, towed the car, I went to jail, and then. um they tried to book me in, and then. they did the breathalyzer. Well, I. passed the breathalyzer. I told the cop, I said, well, I told you, like I wasn't. drunk, this was pointless. So, I'm. getting my stuff back. The cop comes. back out, and he's like, hey, I got. something for you, you're not leaving. yet. So, I was like, what the.

So, he brings me back a. public intoxication. So, he gives me that, and now I have to. go get a lawyer. I've already paid him a. thousand dollars. I had to pay three. hundred dollars to get my car out of. impound. >> All because she's a crazy. >> Because she called a welfare check on me. because I was sitting in a grocery. store. >> months before this happened, and nothing. happened. The only reason I did is. because I legitimately was afraid that. something was wrong. I I even called. >> when someone has their location, you. shouldn't be checking someone's. location, like.

>> I wouldn't have. I didn't. >> Why were you? >> Because he wasn't answering me, and he. wasn't home when he was supposed to be. >> to always answer you. >> He does when he's two hours away, and. he's already supposed to be home. >> I was in a grocery store. It's not like. it was like pulled up at some random. apartment. >> I had a migraine. >> why didn't you just text her real quick? >> like I did. I said, I was supposed to be. home. I said, I'm on my way home, I'm leaving. in a second, and then I left. I pulled. into like I got back into town, I pulled.

into the grocery store, threw my phone, I was like, this and like just. >> have texted her real quick. You should. have texted her real quick. If you if. you were expecting to. >> would have if I knew I was going to get. arrested. >> it's relatively fair for someone to be. concerned if. >> regardless. For for respect for your. wife, you should want to text her. >> I literally. What would it. matter if I got home a couple hours. later? >> If you want to land a high-paying job, but don't have experience or a degree, then you need to learn about Course. Careers. It is the easiest way to land a. high-paying career that you've been.

dreaming of. I've done financial audits. for hundreds of people, and what I've. learned is that the single biggest. factor someone can take to improve their. life is getting a higher-paying job. And. that is why I've been such a huge. promoter and even an investor in. CourseCareers. The way it works is you. simply go through an affordable online. course to start a new high-paying career. path. They teach many different. in-demand jobs ranging from technology. sales to accounting, construction. project management, the trades like. electrician, plumbing, HVAC, supply. chain, and many others that can be done.

remotely. And the coolest part about. CourseCareers is their platform works. for people who don't have any previous. experience or degrees. Their courses. teach you everything you need to know to. land your first entry-level job. And. they have a 100% free introductory. course for each career that teaches you. all about what the job is like, how much. money you'd make, and how exactly to. land your first job with starting from. scratch. Click the link below to sign up. for one of their free courses today. I. already launched Liquid Assets, my. official GamerSupps flavor, raspberry. apple, and it's been selling like crazy.

Here's the update. The free gift. stacking promo from Christmas in July. has officially sold out, but the flavor. hasn't. Zero sugar, under 1 calorie, 100. servings a tub, same new tropic blend, same full vitamin stack, still just. [music] four scoops a day max. Code. Caleb still gets you 10% off your entire. order, and there's still a shot, one out. of every 10, that your tub comes with my. face on it. All you need to do is head. to gamersupps.gg/caleb. or click the link in the description.

below. Yeah, but. >> when somebody's worried about you and. you said you're on the way. >> why would you immediately be worried? >> Because it's been hours and you're not. answering me no matter what I do. >> a helicopter wife, for sure, but like, if you were supposed to be home in a. couple of hours and she was planning on. it, then all of a sudden like you're. just like stuck somewhere. >> Yeah, but like, I'll like I'm the kind. of person I'll sit there and talk to. some random person in a gas station for. like an hour. Like it's not. >> not the same. You would answer your. phone then. >> No. >> Yes. You would say something like, "Hey,

real quick. Be right back." Like. literally anything to say that you're. not dead somewhere would be sufficient. and I would leave you the alone. But no, I don't even get that. >> I just wouldn't share location. >> He doesn't anymore. >> Fair. >> Well, I'm just not going to let him go. to his friend's house anymore then. >> What? >> Yeah. He doesn't ever go, so he just can. stay at home if he's not going to let me. know that he's on his way home or. anything. going on. >> Like I don't just I'll leave if I want. to go do something. I'm not worried.

about that. >> And you think you can stop him? >> worried about anything. >> You think you can stop him? How are you stopping him? >> I haven't ever tried to stop him before. >> How will you try? >> I don't know. >> What's left? >> Being dramatic. I don't I mean it's not. being technicalities, but. >> Emotional abuse. >> be upset if he tries to do something. like that again and. >> conversation about it? >> Yeah. I mean if I sit there and say. nothing to you. >> What am. I supposed to say to that?

>> Yeah, you guys are up. Yeah. $1,156.38. on this Fortiva credit card again, that. it was him so that's trying to say. $18.28 a month. Just made the minimum. Paying him in essentially. Yep. No. purchases, but there is interest. There. is fees. Why? Paper statements. Why do. you have to get paper statements? You're. paying for paper statements that you. probably never even look at. >> No. >> No, I do. But she doesn't like I like to. have them, but she doesn't ever open so. she doesn't open mail. She will not open.

mail. So when I get home, I have all the. paper stuff I can go through and look at. it all and then I shred everything. >> Oh, you have a Credit One, too, buddy. and that's like the worst credit card. you can get. So no, I don't trust you on. paying off the payday loan. >> Oops. >> I just don't. It's basically maxed out. $627.87. with a minimum monthly payment of $32. What was Fortiva for? What did you rack. all that thousands up for? >> Fortiva? >> Yeah, that's the Alienware. >> Gaming PC? Alienware?

>> Yeah, my laptop. >> Oh. Well, I guess it's mobile Alienware. >> didn't even I didn't even get the crazy. one. I went like basic, like. $1,000 laptop. Ain't. >> That's basic. >> Yeah. >> Oh, no, no, no. I don't think so. >> She can't say Her laptop's $2,400. >> She doesn't know what she's talking. about. But like, did you have to do. this? >> The laptop? >> Yeah, yeah. >> Yeah, I wanted to play World of Warcraft. cuz the Burning Crusade popped back out. >> Wanted. You put it on a credit card that. is accruing interest and fees. Wanted.

With your money, you should have bought. this in cash easily. Done. Dead. >> And the difference is that you used my. money. >> I didn't want to have to explain a. $1,000 like. >> Yeah, for nutrition. >> It's still a degree. >> It's a degree for something a business. you're trying to start that is never. going to do anything. >> I mean, it might. Probably not in. Arkansas. >> That's the conversation I have and then. she gets mad. >> Oh, you tell her that it's going to not. work? How do you say it? >> I mean like. >> wanted to do the doula thing and then.

like I fed into all that and she was. making hella killing with one client and. then stopped and then like we had our. daughter and I delivered her at home. myself. Like that was crazy and then. they kind of just fell off cuz COVID and. then never picked back up and then she. wanted to do the nutrition thing to like. help with the doula thing, but it's like. in the area in the area. in the area we live in, it's not even. practical. Like the I would say the. average income in our area is maybe. 20-something thousand a year.

>> in a piece of place? >> We have to for my son. His dad lives. there, so until he's 18, like. >> Hey, what were you doing? Why are you. popping out a baby with a random dude at. 18, freak. >> I was actually married and I was 20 when. I had him. >> Why? >> Military wife, because I'm an idiot. >> Who cheated on who? >> He did on me. >> I heard the bartender. >> Yeah. >> So, that's what brings. >> Oh, that's why you're not allowed to go. to bars anymore. >> Do your bars ever have titties in them? >> They're They're old women.

>> Titty bars? >> I'm talking That's different. I ain't. doing nothing at a strip club. They. >> You're not going to strip clubs? >> No, I'm saying those women have been. passed around. I ain't touching them. Like, why would I even think about that? >> I don't believe that you've never done. anything in. >> I'm selective. Like, I would not go to a. strip club if that's what I was. >> but you've done nothing in 11 years. >> Yeah. >> With the women on Snapchat and. Instagram. What? >> You would see why somebody might have. their worries.

>> I think it's a. >> about bars or not being somewhere when. you say you will. >> Okay, you have a Bank of America Okay, this is maxed out. You actually spent. money on here while you were accruing a. ton of interest. Takes 11 years to. pay off. All kids will be out of the house. What are you doing, man? Klarna. You're purchasing on Klarna on here? Wait, what? Are you paying What What are. you. What do you mean? >> So many payments. >> Klarna What Klarna are you paying for?

Klarna? Is there like Klarna premium? Do. Do I not even know about this? >> I don't know. >> It's 25 bucks, dude. >> Oh, that's probably. >> Is it a Klarna debt that you pay a debt. with? But you're paying a debt with a. debt? You're You're paying a credit card. payment with a credit card. >> I don't know which Bank of America I. have three Bank of America accounts. >> Uh well, it's the one that you get. Klarna on. >> Yours. >> He's had late payments every month this. year so far. >> Yeah. >> Oh. >> Bro, I'm I'm not surprised. >> Did you know?

>> No. I mean, I'm but I'm sure. >> access to that account. They're the ones. that. >> access to that account. The credit card. That's the account. >> No, I have When you pull up the app, it. has the checking account. and then the credit card right under it. >> So, she could see that if she wanted to. You're late every month, dude. This is. pathetic. Why are you spending money. when you're late every month? >> I pay my bills. My bills are paid. That's what you said. >> You know they're not. >> I don't remember it being late. I paid. it. >> late every month since you. >> Well, it's not like Okay, it's not.

technically late till it's like what? 14. day or 10 days? >> No, I didn't say I didn't say missed. payment. I said late. >> Yeah. So, I don't I don't mind paying. things late as long as it doesn't hit. the 10 14 day and then hit the. >> Why? Because you're cuz you're still. having to pay an extra $120 added to. this card this year. And then more. interest as well. You're having to pay. more money for it. >> It's not late on the credit, though. >> No, it's not a missed payment. It's a. late payment. Late payment means you're. paying more for it still, though. You're. still facing a punishment. Just not on your credit report.

>> Accruing it. >> Huh? >> I said accruing more interest, essentially. >> All right, let me handle the financial. conversation. >> Yeah, what? It's a 100 bucks. >> 120 this year so far as of 2 months ago, so I'm sure it's more. $300 in interest. as well cuz more interest is accruing. It's going to be well over a thousand by. year's end at that rate. And again, you're paying a credit card payment with. a credit card. Capital One. You. Shocker. It's you.

Basically maxed out $413.56. A little more than a minimum, but you. didn't even pay the last one in time. So, this makes no sense. This is all. over the place. $25 a month. >> I opened up that one a couple years ago. and just. >> Congrats. >> never went back to it. So, >> We've had late fees this year. Even though you paid a little extra that. time. It makes no sense. You're You're all over the place, man. This is just what a mess. Credit. Fresh. I've never even heard of this. Oh.

my god, it's basically maxed out. What. is this, dude? >> Uh I just took the full load out in cash. and put it in my bank account. >> A. >> [screaming]. >> fool why? >> I was trying to use it to do debt. consolidation. >> Oh, you pathetic. >> Yeah, the credit one. >> Oh, it's gone higher. It's at. It's at 4,000. $31.31. What are you doing? What are you doing,

you. Minimum monthly purchase $200. Billing cycle charge, that's a fee. Fee? Why is there a fee? Billing cycle charge. fee. What's your normal payment? Oh, do. What the This makes no sense. $250. $3 minimum payment, but then there's a. billing cycle fee of $214. Is that every. month? There's no clarification. Where. did this money go? Did you consolidate? >> No, I did, but then I maxed the cards. back out. >> even higher. It's above the limit. It's.

at $4,800 now. Did you know that? >> No. >> What are you going to do about this? Do. you care? I mean, it's his fault, don't get me. wrong, but like what are you going to. do? >> I care, but I don't I don't I don't have no idea. how to deal with all this. >> but he's your partner. He's going to do. this forever, and if he doesn't give a. then. >> Yeah, I mean, that I would be out. >> So, this is your life forever. >> Yeah, no, I do not want that. >> is. >> Yeah, mhm. >> But in fact, it is. >> Mhm. I will move to Mexico and then.

>> Okay, well, congratulations. There's no. consequences. You can just go ahead and. keep doing this. Does it even matter? Affirm. for. Evolve. Play, SeatGeek, Chase, Walmart, BoxLunch, eBay, Royal Merchant Beer Can. Boards. Hollister, Easy Contact, American Eagle, King Body Jewelry. Whose is this? Cuz it's actually not. labeled. >> That's all his.

>> Yeah, there was like clothes for the. kids and. >> All that's for the kids? All the games, all the everything? Shut the up. $384.48. Ah, you. Dude, I don't even know what to do with. you. You need more hobbies on this boat. Cuz you just spend money and you're. bored. I recognize the spending. anywhere. This is just boredom spending. Guessing it's $96,012 a month. This is.

boredom spending, dude. Finally, you, Capital One. Hey, you're. purchasing on it, nearly $600. >> Yes. >> Why? >> Because I have no money left in the bank. because he spent it all. >> Oh, we'll see when we get to the. checking account. Let's confirm if. that's true here in a bit. Uh luckily, it's not maxed out. $25 a. month. Interest is accruing though. Okay, but what are you doing at Walmart. for $5.14? Like you got groceries for $112, but.

what did you get for $5.14? >> Probably something I forgot. I do that a lot. >> Oh, yeah, cuz then you did it. the next day. >> Maybe cashback fee? >> No, it wouldn't be that much. >> And Five Below, Taco Bell, again, 16 at. Walmart, Dollar General 12, Dairy Queen. Is that what you need to do? Need to do. Dairy Queen? Need to do Taco Bell? And. Discount. Yeah, but that's $5. What the. is that? Uh cones? Some ice cream cones, please? 30 bucks? Oh, jeez.

>> Yeah. >> Right? Like what are we doing? You're. saying. I don't have money to spend on my. checking account, but a lot of it's. still. And interest is accruing accruing like. crazy. I guess the Affirm balance is. even higher because you bought her a. $500 birthday gift. But you said he buys. you nothing. >> He I guess he has something to make up. for this year. >> What'd did get her? >> She don't know yet. It's next month. >> [clears throat]. >> Her Discover card. God, I don't even. have a statement. Hey, you're worse than. him because at least he's had. statements.

Oh, it's closed. But it's not in. collections? No, that one's been paid. off. Oh. I think she just I think she. just paid like a balance on it. It. wasn't completely closed out. Point of. sale installment loan, Affirm. Why don't. I have your Affirm? Again, I could see. his Affirm, why can't I see yours? Um. well, I. was it told to send it in with his. stuff, but I told her to lie. We ask.

everyone to send in their statements. What are you talking about? It's up. anymore. I think she has like. 890 in Affirm. Oh, it's it's higher, great. What are you getting? I got stuff for my cat. Cat tree, like. coffee bar. You all suck at life. $122. Her. Klarna. What the do I do with this? $160. $116. That was for his Christmas present.

last year. Oh, and you still owe on it. You suck. Oh, we're back to him, the guy that can. actually send statements. 12% loan. Um. Okay, what did you borrow from Empower? That's a 401k. And then I pay it back because I'm just. paying myself the interest. Yeah, but. you're still losing money cuz you're not. getting market gains. No, they still. they take the full balance. Like. whenever I borrow from it, I still have.

the base amount. Because I'm paying it. back, then I get the full. back on it. I'm not losing money by. taking it out. I didn't know that. I thought it still. was. >> what? If you did get fired from that job. because she you got arrested, it would. have been called due. >> So, one of those was um that there's. two. >> And what was this for?

>> Uh down payment on the house. >> [snorts]. >> Pardon me for okay, for down payment on. the house. >> Mhm. >> Okay. And for what it's worth, the. interest that you're paying back to. yourself, but you're having to pay it. So, it's still your money. It's that 12%. instead of actually just getting a free. 12% in the market. So, when you think. you're paying it to yourself, it's still. you just putting money in. So, stop. thinking it's like a return. It's a very. weird perspective you people have on. this. >> I would rather pay myself interest than. some company though. >> Yeah, but I would rather you just get.

the interest for free instead of you. having to put it in there. What? Plus, how about instead of. borrowing for a down payment, you just. save up money and get a down payment? >> It was $900. >> Okay, well, that's the second one then. >> Okay. You're paying half quote for. something. I don't even know. What the. is this woman? >> Oh, for my Jeep. >> Oh, great. Again, you can't send a. statement cuz you are literally. $6,529.24. Smacking your lips isn't going to help. you get out of that. What is the payment.

on this? >> 423. >> What's the interest? And that's why we would like a. statement, you actual piece of. incapable of. >> I mean, I can find it. >> helping me do anything. Uh what do you. think it's worth? >> Two grand. >> Not that. >> [laughter]. >> $2,500. >> You're the Volkswagen, huh? >> Yeah. >> 17% interest. Wouldn't be surprised if. it was pretty close. $12,809. with a minimum monthly payment of.

>> 349. >> 349. These balances aren't the worst. balances for car loans for your guys'. income position, but the interest rate. is horrible and the terms are very long. and this is what $600. >> Yeah. >> $600. >> I'm I was going to trade it in and they. were going to give me $6,000 for it, but. I didn't want to take out another. bigger loan. >> that. >> I didn't want negative equity like six. grand. >> Here's your other 401k. There you go. It's $8,600.

Okay. Checking accounts what I'm most. curious of, but here we go. See the. >> That $8,000 was the balance in there. I. don't think that's what I That's not. what I took out. >> That is probably true. I don't know. Okay, I don't see it on that sheet. Okay, you got $40,000 in student loans, don't you? >> Yeah. >> For not even having a degree. >> I have a baby one, but yeah, going to. have a bachelor's. >> Yeah. >> You suck, but that's deferred for now. Okay, house. >> it's $40,000? >> Oh, you bet you, buddy.

It'll be more. $192,330. on this house. Interest rate 6.25. Yeah, that kind of makes sense. Minimum due. payment of $1,509.07. Okay. I can figure out about that, but I. don't like you borrowing to get the down. payment. Now, $149 in the checking. account. This is what I wanted to get. to, and this is the joint account. So, let's see where it's all going. Tell me. who did what. Sonic, Sonic. >> Me. >> Okay, so you're taking from the checking. account for that Burger King. >> Uh the fast food's going to be me.

>> Oh! What about Hobby Lobby? Would he go. to Hobby Lobby? >> Doubtful. >> Oh, that's interesting. Sonic driving. Hm. Liquid Aid, mobile purchase. That's him. >> Yeah. >> Okay, Bargain. Uh-huh. TJ Max. >> Uh that could possibly be him. Papa John's, Brew Coffee, Chat GPT. I. thought he had Chat GPT, but those two. going out to eat is yours. Taco Bell, Amazon, Sonic. Amazon could be him.

Sonic is yours. Sonic, sushi, you lucky. brand, you Hot Topic maybe him. Uh that's a all. throughout. Stepping in and getting. little item purchases could be both of. you. Sushi definitely you, Burger King. definitely you, Pizza Hut definitely. you. See how this is going, woman? >> Well, the fancy restaurants are. expensive. up. McDonald's, brewed coffee, Taco Bell, Sonic. You said he spends all his money. I have to put it on the credit card cuz. he spends all the money and drains all. his checking account. >> The only thing I spend money on is food. >> Yeah, and you spent hundreds of dollars.

>> Yeah, well I got. >> On groceries as well. Cook, woman. >> expensive as hell, too. They're. expensive as hell, too. They're expensive as hell, >> Not as expensive even close to his food. >> I mean we drop like 500 on groceries, so. I mean it's arguably more. >> No, it's not arguably. It's not even. close. You spent hundreds of dollars, drained your checking account, and then. you say you don't have enough money, so. you have to put it on our credit card. You're coping your entire life to make. bad decisions. You're pathetic. You're. upsetting. to be around. Okay, total income. Practically. Okay, 7,000.

50. Good. That's our average. Let's get. our minimum monthly debts. This is going. to stack, let me tell you. $3,730.26. That's crazy. And 7 cents. That's. including with the mortgage. What you. utilities? Utilities, internet, gas, electric. Come. on. >> Water is about 32 a month. Electric's. about 160 a month. >> [snorts]. >> Um. >> Internet, gas. >> Internet was 120. I dumped it down. Um. >> Okay, gas. It's 75. Gas, I don't know.

>> We don't have gas in our house. I have. no idea what it costs. >> Just uh just whatever. Phone bill, how. much? >> Three. 10, 320. >> Listen, I would do Helium for her, maybe. not for you cuz you're out on the water, but I would do Helium for her 15 bucks a. line. It's good in most places in the. >> paid off. I'd either trade them in or. sell them. >> that. Let me do it. I'll also get you a. course crew certification, so you can. get a. job instead of this pretend homemaker. No, you're not. Shut up. You. can get in. tech, in the trades, and a lot of.

different things. People in the audience. use it to get a six-figure job. And then. I'll get you guys also set up with the. Chime. Chime card as well. It's really good. Lots of benefits signing up for our. audience, but I'll get you it as well. So, check that out. Okay, gas? Vroom vroom drive drive monthly, how. much? >> Oh, that's what we don't have any gas. utilities, so I thought that was it. >> I know, but he said 320 for the other. gas. We don't have any gas. >> No, he didn't. He added. Shut up.

>> Well, I don't do a lot of driving. >> So, just answer the question. >> now. I said I don't. >> How much [screaming] gas do you. purchase? >> No idea. I maybe put $30 in a week. >> Oh my. sucks, man. Okay, you? >> None, I'm on a boat. >> But but yeah, but not always. >> When I'm home, I just use the other car. I mean, I like we only drive one car. >> to round it to 175. >> 120. >> 120 a month, probably a. Okay, I'll take 300. Okay.

>> When I When I come in off the boat, I. got to rent a car, too. I don't pay gas. >> Car insurance? >> 300. >> Necessary food, you and the kids, all. that stuff, but you're kind of gone all. the time. We should be able to do about. 800 meal preps, [clears throat] meal. plans, and you actually have to cook. And yes, and it's a lot of warming up. more than anything cuz you prepared a. lot. But you have to do it while you're. on a budget cuz your debt payments are. way too high. TP, anything else for you. and the kids that include school. supplies, activities, all that good. stuff. It's different stuff each month, but you should be able to do $300 a. month. Medical, health care, copays, how.

much? >> I never go, but I think our copays are. like. >> Well, okay, if you don't go, then I. don't have to budget it in, dude. Is there a gym? >> Hell no. >> Okay. Okay. Subscriptions, I'll do 100 bucks. Pets, how many cats? How many dogs? What? >> One cat. >> 50 bucks pet insurance, how much for pet. supplies monthly? >> I would say around 100. >> Okay. Anything else that needs to be in. this budget that I did not do?

>> I don't think so. >> I would say subscriptions is probably. more. >> Except. >> No. Cuz you're cutting that is the point. This is sacrificing. You get that? >> No. >> Huh? >> He doesn't get sacrificing. >> Yes. >> Okay. Interesting. Okay, $6,312.07. a month. You're going to take forever to. pay off this debt because that is only a. wiggle room of about 700 bucks and of. the debt being.

$272,870, but we're subtracting $192,330. of mortgage and we are subtracting. $40,401. of student loans leaving you with. $40,000 of bad debt. That $40,000 of bad. debt with the seven. hundred fifty left in a monthly basis. That's 53 months. That is too much. Literally, you just go work double the. time you're doing now and you guys pay. off this debt in like a year, two years. Two years, but right now this takes. four and a half, which is ridiculous. >> That's with our student loans?

>> Without. >> Without. >> And without the mortgage. You need to go get a job. Use. your course career certifications. Stop. with this. business thing that is never going to. work where you are. Go work even what. you're doing right now, double the. hours. Pay off this debt in two years, then get into a fully funded emergency. fund and then live 50 30 20. 50% on. needs, 30% on wants, which will be a. good amount of money for you guys'. income. And 20% and then And then uh 20% goes to. investing cuz you guys need to. dramatically catch up for your mid-30s. You guys are far behind. In fact, I'll.

do 50% on needs, 25% on wants, 25% on. our investing. Okay? Um. Now, here's the thing. We're going to get I I got to get the. hammer financial score first, but the. thing is in the post show, there's. something he did recently. >> What? >> that he did behind your back that is. going to blow your mind and I'm sorry. [music] So, just yeah, we will go into. it in the post-show. Um but, let's get. the Hammer Financial Score first. Spending in your budget, you didn't. overspend, but it didn't go any you just. broke even, but everything went to just.

Nothing to progress of debt. So, one out of 10. Debt, there's. collections, zero out of 10. >> [music]. >> Uh by that close the account. And. um. emergency fund, nothing, zero out of 10. Retirement, you have a little bit, but. you have a 401k loan against it against. it and very behind on retirement, so two. out of 10. Real estate, I don't know. What What's the house worth? >> 220. >> Okay, so you would barely you wouldn't. even break even. You'd have to write a. check to sell it. Uh so, that's not. great. Interest earned, but you have a. 401k loan against the down payment. >> [music]. >> Not the best, at least you're in the.

market, three out of 10. Hammer Financial Score, one out of 10. Get your updated score at. CalebHammer.com for free. Now, join us. in the post-show, plus an extra three. premium shows every single day, six days. a week. The best membership on YouTube. for a reason with over 100,000 monthly. active subscribers because. it's incredible. It is the best on the. platform. You can also download the. Hammer Lead app or go to Hammer. Lead.com. You'll see us in the. post-show. >> I mean, I would like for him to finally. realize that it's a mess. >> Yeah, do you think he did? >> I think that [snorts] he will probably.

try really well for a couple of months, and that will be about it. >> And then, what are you going to do after. that? >> It's been a lot of times already. I am. not going to keep sticking around for. this. >> So, you mean divorce? I just launched the brand new Hammer. Elite [music] app, available on every. major platform. So, you can watch every. show anywhere you want. You'll get three. exclusive dedicated shows every single. day, Monday through Saturday. Refer a. friend after you sign up, and you get an. additional 30 days of Hammer Elite. access for free. [music] Download the.

Hammer Elite app by using the link in. the description or pin comment down. below. This is the best membership. you'll ever join, and that's a promise. I want you to be on the next episode of. Financial Audit right here in Austin, Texas. If you think you have interesting. finances with an interesting personality. or a story or a life or relationship, I. will personally pay you to take time off. of work, fly you down to Austin, get you. personal transportation, a hotel, food, and we'll have a great time hanging out. Go to CalebHammer.com/apply or click. that link in the description below.