My Biggest Crashout Yet | Financial Audit
I was told to come. My mistake, my. personal guidance. Cuz a mystic. >> You know, they read the cards, they read. the stars. >> The stars said come to Austin for. financial audit. How are you affording. that? You know, I asked grandma for some. money. >> You're taking this from a 73-year-old. woman? I mean, she has money. I'm a bad. [ __ ] and I like a bougie lifestyle. I. feel my blood pressure rising more than. I have felt in any episode in a very. long time because I am enraged at you. >> You should get it checked out then. You. are one of the worst people that has sat.
in that seat in a long time. Black Friday starts now. Master Your. Money, my all-in-one personal finance. membership is finally live. It is every. single course I've ever made, exclusive. content, and a members-only community. Click the link below and become a member. of the best money membership on the. planet. I'll see you inside. My name is Jason. I'm from Houston, Texas, 29, and this is Financial Audit. Thanks for coming over to Austin. What. do you do in Houston for a living? I am. a data freight analyst. Data freight?
What's that? Like I basically we get the. invoices and we're entering the. information into our system. I work for. a gas. Yeah, a gas company. Yeah. Good. Okay. Cool. How many hours a week are you. working? Is it salary or is it hourly? Hourly. I work 40 hours a week. >> What's your hourly pay? Uh 21. What? Um. Houston? Yes. 21's going to stretch a little less. there compared to many other places. Fourth largest city in the country. We'll probably be number three before we. know it. Um but also, you know, compared to many.
other major cities, it's not like the. hyper most expensive depending on the. neighborhood. What hits your account per paycheck? Um. about 13 13 every 2 weeks. >> 13 a week? >> Yeah. 13? How are you doing in Houston? 12 or 13? Is it 12 or 13? >> I'd say 13 just in case. Yeah. Okay. And. how are you doing? 2,600? That's not like. living in luxury by any means. We're. talking 31,000 net a year. I mean, I. stay at home. I live with my parents, so.
You do? Yes. For how long have you been. living with your parents? It's not that. you can't at 29. Many cultures do, but. in our culture, it is a little. more odd and might suggest something of. I don't want to say failure or lazy. necessarily cuz they they can be good. support systems if we ever have to move. back as we're figuring things out. But. it does suggest something in our culture. potentially. Um I mean. it.
Yeah, I don't know. I'm so sorry. Well, it's okay. What What are you thinking? Uh I mean, yeah, I moved back uh last. summer. So, I've been living there. >> back? Okay. Yeah. You moved back. I was living at my cousin's house. It. didn't work out there, so I ended up. going to my friend's house. If you ever. lived alone with your parents Have you. ever lived not with moving into a friend. or cousin or parents? >> No. It's always been with somebody else. Well, you don't make much I guess for. the area. Is that Is that why? Um no.
>> follow everywhere you live since you're. bouncing around places? >> sometimes, you know. >> Sometimes? I don't know. It seems like. you're bouncing. Uh I mean, you know, I. like a certain lifestyle. Some people. don't like it that I be spending money. >> Lifestyle? Well, you What? They don't. like that you're spending money? Why do. Wait. They The drama is you spending. money? I don't think so. I mean, yeah, it's like. >> they disagree with? I mean, that could. be That's probably it. Okay. Cuz you're Hispanic, right? >> Yes. Yeah. Yeah. White Hispanic. It's.
They exist. We've seen them. There's one. behind you. His name is Brandon. Uh but your real name is quite Hispanic. Or else I honestly would have thought. you just white boy. Oh, no, no. I'm. Hispanic. Let me know. >> Well, Hispanics Hispanics and the gays. Yeah. Not Not always the biggest fans. What? Typically deeply religious. I. mean, you do have a cross on your ear. Yes. Is that the gay ear? No. Which one is. it? The right ear? I think. I don't know. We We don't We don't do.
sides of gays. What? >> We just go full gay. Period. That's it. Okay. Yeah. And but yeah, you have a. cross and so but they haven't kicked you. out due to the gayness? No. I mean. >> No, so it's about you spending money. Why do they care if you're spending. money unless you're not paying your. rent. You're not paying your rent? I. mean, I'll pay the rent, but like So, why would they kick you out for spending. your 31,000 hours a year? Like they want. extra money and Was the extra money. agreed on? No. They just asked for. >> them. Why do they deserve extra money. for you to live there if it wasn't.
agreed? I guess because that I like to. go out. I like to spend money. I guess. because they can't. Yeah. I guess so. Now, tell me how these conversations. went. Something's going on. That seems. weird. It would be weird that multiple. groups of people would do that same. exact thing. Like if one person did it. one-off, I could be like, "Okay, I could. see that. They're a little weird, you. know. Let him do what he wants with his. money. If he wants to be a failure, let. him be a failure, you know." That's the. conversation. >> honestly. Jealousy at 31,000 hours a. year? I mean, I guess cuz like they have.
Like they have their own house. They're. paying their own bills. They can't. really spend money. They should be. jealous of them. No, not really. I don't want a house. So, you think. everyone is petty jealous? Yeah. Where I. have a note that when you're with your. cousin, you said to Colton that it was. too much drama with her and her man. I. mean, that also, yeah. I guess he didn't like the way that I. spend my money. I mean. >> What? That doesn't make any sense. How. does it always come back to that? What. do you mean? Why Why Why does her your.
cousin's man's opinion on you spending. your money. matter than him living there? Huh? He. doesn't work. He don't make his own money. So, I guess. him seeing me spend my money. So, he kicks you out? Well, technically. her, but yeah. What? Um. >> That doesn't make any sense. Can you. explain how that makes sense and how. that works? I don't know. She just kind. of does what he says. I don't know. She's a breadwinner. >> He He's a what? She's a what? She's a.
breadwinner. The breadwinner. >> Breadwinner. Yeah, that one. So, I'm con- I'm confused how this. worked out. I feel like I am not getting. the full story here, buddy. Why you. ended up back home with the parents at. 29, kicked out from the cousins because. the unemployed one didn't like how you. were spending your money. I'm I'm. confused how that makes sense. They. would have to have not liked something. else to kick you out. No. I mean. >> Fine. Call them. Oh, I don't have. >> Will he back this up? No, their numbers. are blocked. Both of their numbers? You. blocked your cousin? Yeah.
I've never blocked a family member, bro. Be honest. Oh, I got plenty. We can go. through it. >> you do, and that's why it is suggesting. to me it is likely not just because of. how you spent your money. Unless you. were paying for prostitutes to come over. every day or getting coke all over the. table. No. Okay, then that doesn't really make any. sense. I don't know. I just I'm a bad. [ __ ] and I like a bougie lifestyle, and. I guess they can't have it. What bougie. lifestyle do you live on 31,000 hours a. year? I mean What were you paying them. in rent? Them, I think it was like 600 a.
month. Yeah, I think so. What was this bougie lifestyle and why. what bad didn't like bad What do you. mean? Or you're a bad roommate? No, no, no. I just like to go out, buy food, buy. >> Yeah, but I don't understand how that. would impact them. I mean, it's cuz they. can't do it. This does not make any. sense. I'm confused. I'm confused. I feel like I am not. getting an honest representation of the. events that led you back home to your. parents. No. Yeah, that's it.
I mean, after getting kicked out from. there, I ended up going to my friend's. house. >> Uh-huh. I lived there. probably like maybe like four four. months, four five months. And I guess they. It. >> It was Well, it was just a small space. and like we had. two dogs. If you're living with someone else. that's being very nice and letting you. crash there, what's wrong with that? Um. I don't know. I guess we were just.
clashing. Sounds like you clash with. everyone. Why were you clashing? Um. Well, are you a petty sassy gay? I mean. Cuz we love a sassy gay. I don't know if. we love a petty sassy gay. I mean, I can. be. whatever. I feel like you're. a petty sassy gay. Um. [Music]. Yeah, I can be. I'm a petty. straight. Colton's a sassy gay. We love them, but then you get petty.
sassy gay. It's the best. No, it's a. supervillain. No. That can't maintain housing because no. one would want to be around them. I. mean, I'm a good vibe. Why are you here? To get some help, I. guess, financially. >> Yeah, what made you decide to come on. the show? I was told to come. My. mistake, my personal guidance. She told me that she would see me on the. show. >> A mystic is a person. >> Yes. Cuz a mystic A guidance. Like How.
do you not know what a mystic is? >> one that will allow you to be in their. life for more than five months cuz you. pay them? Uh no. You don't pay your mystic? I mean, yeah, I do. Used to be monthly. Now we see. each other weekly. Oof. You ramped up. the mystic. Well, yeah. I mean. But you have a cross. Are you. I I I guess I'm confused on your. religion. I mean, I can have a cross and. still explore, have fun. >> mystic? I mean. >> advised you to be here, maybe mystic is. correct. I mean, you know, they read the.
cards, they read the stars. They got the stars. The stars said come. to Austin for financial audit? Yeah. I mean, my brother also told me, but she. was the main one. How much is she? How. much is she? Yeah, and your mystic. Oh, weekly? Yes. About a hundred each. session. >> Um kind of you know, I asked grandma for. some money. Asked her I'll tell her like. But you moved in with mom and dad. And.
you're asking grandma for money? I'll. ask her for, you know, some money for. like cuz I have a dog, like I said, I. have a dog and two cats. >> shouldn't. I have a Frenchie, actually. >> probably shouldn't. Why? He's my best. friend. And you probably shouldn't have. him. But yeah, I'll ask her for money, be like I need dog food or cat food. >> Oh, this is why you shouldn't have them. That's disgusting. >> And then I will go. >> Come on, that's gross. >> once-a-week session. with my mystic. 26 hits your account on. a monthly basis. You spend $400 a month. on your.
mystic. Mhm. 15 over 15% of your income. goes to that. [ __ ]. [ __ ] And you can't even afford to. take care of your own animals and you. move back in with your parents at 29? I. mean. >> What the [ __ ] are you doing? They're. being fed. Fed by your grandmother. I mean, I'm her favorite, right? I call. my grandma abuela. I'm her favorite, so. if I ask her, she'll say yes. >> She's your favorite for possibly why? I'm just the fun one out of all the all. the grandchildren. >> But everyone kicks you out after you. live with them.
And then you block them. Have you. blocked your friend? No. I go see her once a week for our. weekly sessions. >> your mystic? Oh, yeah, that's my mystic, yeah. The one you moved in with? >> Yes, yeah. What the [ __ ]. That's my mystic. >> What the [ __ ] Buddy, this is a mess. That's my best friend. >> in with that person and now you're still. giving them Does she know you're her. best friend? Because you pay her, you. literally pay her to hang out. >> Yeah, she does. You pay her to hang. Whenever I need to call.
>> consider you? A client. >> Yeah. Plus her best friend. No. >> Yes. You said you go see her once a. week. >> Mhm. If you were best friends, you'd be. hanging out outside of that. I mean, we. call each other, but when we do our. sessions I'm sure she charges for it. Yeah, I mean Does she? Aha. No, not the. other calls, but during our sessions, yes. Like if I have questions about a certain. thing or I need, you know, some. guidance, then you know, I'll call her. for a session. So what's going on in. here? Cuz we know you don't make a lot.
of money for the area. You moved back in. with parents after crashing out with. everyone and your only friend is someone. you pay. What is happening in here? What's going. on? What are we talking about today? Dead. >> your mystic's a friend of the fan of the. show. Thank you, Miss Mystic. Um here we're to here today talk about. my debt. Your debt. Oh. Yeah, why you. Mhm. Cuz I. >> do you have? I think I don't quite remember. >> you got, what did it result in? Ah, I.
don't remember. You don't remember? I. don't look at the bank account. I just. spend. >> how much debt do you think you have, you. Come on, sir. Maybe like 26,000. in debt, I think. Oh, you're a you're Oh, no, you're the. version of a petty sassy gay. $60,710.81. Mhm. Yeah. That. It's a big amount. You're poor. >> But I You're poor. In what world? No.
>> tell tell me how you're not poor. I mean. Like I said, I'll just ask grandma for. some money. Would that not indicate poor? No, cuz I. still get money. You don't have money. >> I mean, I have other people I talk to. and if I ask them for money, they'll. send it to you. >> Yeah, I don't know. You don't know your. net worth? Uh. No. Okay. Well, your checking and. savings combined is $15.64.
So I would suggest your net worth is. negative almost $61,000. You are broke. You are poor. You have. nothing. You have nothing. I mean. >> You get money from grandma indicating. that you are a child. You moved back in. with mommy and daddy, not necessarily a. bad thing in most cultures, but in our. culture suggests you are a child. >> I mean, I do make money. >> kicked out from multiple people, including the one you pay to be your. friend. Aha.
Yeah, you get money, $30,000 a year. And. I'm not shaming you for that, but look. how you're living with it. >> What, you get more than that? Are you. saying is there a side hustle? >> Um well, there's that and then also. about the job part. I actually got laid off. So I don't have a job. When? Maybe when I got the call from here, actually. What is this little sound you make after. you say I mean I was.
>> go. I don't know. So I ended up being. You know, you're a dick. We don't allow. people to come on that don't have a job. You get the call and then you get laid. off afterwards and you don't let us. know. You're a prick. I mean I'll still. do this cuz there's going to be. people Listen, it's a high layoff year, actually, so I more people relate to it. than before, unfortunately. >> unemployment, so Well, I told you you. get paid by the system. Yeah, why'd you get. This sounds more like fired than laid.
off cuz you mentioned being late, but go. ahead, what happened? >> yeah. Tell me what happened. Basically. that morning I I got a call from the. producers. I was I mean, I was sitting outside at. work, so I was on the camera at work, but. Are you saying we got you fired? I mean. You decided to take the call. Well, I. mean, I had to. I wanted to be on the. show. Yeah, but you could have contacted. a. different time, please. Thank you. No, I. didn't want to miss the call.
Well, anyway, so I ended up taking the. call. I was late like maybe 10 minutes. So I guess they marked it off as a. strike. So as soon as I walked in, they. said sex it My boss had texted me, "Let's go into the meeting room to have. a little chat.". Went into the meeting room, um. she said that I had been continuously. late Okay, so it wasn't the call. It. wasn't us. It was you being late. consistently. But it's like 10 minutes, 10, 5 minutes that I've been late. Aha.
Well, this was like the third strike for. her and. >> Aha. But I also think I don't think they. really liked me there, honestly. So. >> Probably not. No one seems to like you. anywhere. Have you realized that yet? I. mean. >> up the trend? That's their problem, not mine. Actually, it ends up being your problem. Mhm. >> think they're affected anymore. They. fired you. They got rid of the person. they didn't like. Now you don't have. money. But I did my job. Late. But it was done. That's obviously. against the rules. No. You have to. follow the rules of the employer. I.
mean, I wasn't the only one being late. Huh? There was other people being late, too. >> Cool, they're probably getting strikes, you tit. Or they use it as an excuse to. fire you because you were miserable to. be around. No. You don't know. I think I'm a fun person. to be around. Okay, but every single. instance of everyone you told me about. it tries to get away from you and the. only person that's sticking around is. someone you pay. Oh, your mystic works there, too. Oh, my. Oh, yeah. Uh she's the one that got me the job. We had a session, yeah. >> accept her referral again. I don't know.
But anyways, yeah, I had no job at the. time, either. I told her I was having these issues. I. didn't know what to do. So we had a. quick little session. She read my cards. She saw She said that. she had saw me. working with her. So I ended up applying. And I got the job. But yeah, she got. fired a couple months after. For what? For being late, also. You. needed to detach yourself from this. person. You both are failures. No. I. mean, she guides me to She guided me. here. Dude, she guided you to the job.
that you both got fired from. But I mean, I still have the job, though. You don't today. Isn't that all that. matters? What are you doing? So how long When did. you get that call? How long have you. been laid off for? Mhm. What are we in. October? >> Okay, Colton tells me you told him you. think you got fired because you're gay. Yeah, I It goes back to my lifestyle. Like I'm so sorry. Okay, the lifestyle you talked about is. the women that were always jealous.
What? When were you with gays? Um not. them. Clearly not. Clearly not? Yes. >> Go on. We're going to need more. information than that. If this is a. discriminatory lawsuit that you're able. to get money from, please describe. >> Well, I mean, I know they didn't like me. because multiple occasions I caught them. talk [ __ ] about me. Well, no [ __ ] No. one likes you, but it's probably not cuz. you're gay. I mean, well, man, it could. be. I don't dislike you cuz you're gay. I. dislike you because you're not able to. reflect on anything that's happened in. your life and realize a pattern. I mean,
everybody has different opinions. They might like me cuz I'm gay. They. might They didn't. Are you able to suggest any type of. proof or examples that would indicate. they didn't like you cuz you're gay? I. Maybe I was the only gay guy working. there. Do you know that? I don't know. That. that. >> I was. I knew that. That's not proof. That's not proof. I mean, they didn't. like me to begin with. They didn't even. like me before I started working there. Tyler's the only black producer we have.
here, and if I fire him for being a. producer, it doesn't mean I fired him. for being black. That's not how it works. because you're the only gay person. there. I mean. If I have to fire Colton cuz he's bad at. his job, well, we're surrounded by like. 50 other gays at the company, so I mean, there was other gays. I caught I always. caught them conversating. I mean, I went. to the boss. The boss didn't like me, though, so she didn't do much. Then I. went to HR, nothing was done, either. And then eventually Because of the. because they were talking behind your. back? Yeah. Well, I don't know. They weren't the people firing.
They were just your coworkers, right? I. mean, one of them was the team lead, so. I mean. >> You very clearly got your three strikes. within a certain period of time for. being late, and that is very obviously. the reason you got fired. How are you. connecting this to anything else? You. know you were late. You saw the strikes. You knew the policy. I mean, they always. talk [ __ ] And it's not the first time. that when they don't like someone, their. goal is to get them fired. It's been. proven multiple times. >> Uh-huh. Are you just throwing away the. thing I just said, where you knew the. policy, you recognized that you were.
late, and you got fired for it? I mean, I told them I was going to be late. So, it's not like I wasn't letting them. know. Besides that last time, I didn't. let them know. >> the go now? How long you staying at. home? Uh, I want to move out. You want to move. out? >> Yes. Okay. How long have you been. unemployed now? Mhm, August? September. One of those two. Beginning of September. Now I remember. Uh-huh. Mhm. And what. have you done to try to go get another.
job? I mean, I've been applying to jobs. >> Mhm. But that's it. How many? Are you. curating your resume specifically for. each job? This is the best job market, I'll be honest. Luckily, you're in a. major city that helps you a lot. That's. where the jobs are. I mean, I guess. >> is a booming economy. I think it was the. second fastest growing economy. Thanksgiving's great and all, but. between flights, grocery bills, and. early Black Friday deals, your wallet. might be less thankful this year. And. that's why today's sponsor, Kickoff, deserves some appreciation. It's the.
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luck, that is bad tracking. And it's. exactly why I use Dollarwise. It shows. you exactly where your money's going. every single month. Spending, subscriptions, and savings all in one. simple dashboard. Everything you need, and nothing you don't. And when you. download Dollarwise today, you'll get to. try for free, plus 3 months for just. $9.99. So, you can finally take control. and see what your money's been doing. behind your back. Click below to get. started. I mean, I was applying to jobs. I mean, being number one, but there's also like. no economy there. Or North Dakota,
there's like barely an economy there, so. it's easy to grow it percent-wise year. over year. Either way, whatever. Good. opportunities here. >> I mean, I've been applying I've been. applying to jobs. I just I don't get. them. Well, no. I'm asking you. resume per job? Or just once? You have. to per job, cuz it gets put through like. an AI filtering thing, and then maybe. you'll get a job a call from the. recruiter. Mhm. What types of jobs are we trying to. get? Well, I did go last year.
to school for an accounting assistant. certificate. >> I did, but I mean, I've been applying. for accounting assistant positions since. then. I haven't got anything. Everyone. wants experience. >> aren't really investing in people right. now. I mean, I'll take a look at your. resume later in the episode or in the. post show, but I'll get you an. accounting certification through Course. Careers. A lot of people have gotten. that in the audience or on the show, and. it's helped them increase their revenue. substantially or their income, or get a. better job. So, hopefully that'll help, but this is a tough job market. This is. where you I. take classes in July for bartending as.
well. But no job, either. I mean, I've been applying. But that's it. No jobs yet. >> The This is a bartending class. Like, you learn how to bartend, make the. drinks. >> Most people learn by getting the job. I don't know. I wanted to learn first. >> YouTube. YouTube was boring. It didn't. really teach stuff. [ __ ]. Mhm. [ __ ]. No. >> [ __ ]. That's why I took the class instead.
But I haven't finished paying off the. classes yet, either. Of course not. How. much did you spend on your bartending. classes? It was 600 for the class. I. think I still owe 300. But I did get my TB TABC already, though. Huh? I think it was like $13. To be able to handle alcohol. That's. what it is. >> All right, yeah. Okay. So, it's a. handler's. Okay. Here's the thing, big guy. Here's the. thing. This bougie lifestyle that you're. obsessed with living, which is why you. think people don't like you. By the way, that's not the reason, but either way. This bougie lifestyle, in what way do.
you think you're able to still sustain. it when I have the month of September. here, and if that is apparently the. month that you were unemployed, your. spending should not essentially be. anything other than minimum necessities. Well, that's why I came to you to make a. budget for me. Yes, I can make a budget. for you if you follow it. You try to. make a good But I'm just saying, you. stop living in the bougie lifestyle. cycle. If we don't change that, you're. You can't I can't. get you out of bouge. The desire for. bouge, I can't get you out of it. It. would have to be managing heavily. Yeah.
How much was spent last month in the. month that you were unemployed, please? Come on. How was it? Oh, money's coming in from. weird sources. But yeah, what was spent? Mhm, I really don't know, either. Think. Try to put yourself into last. month. Think about what you were doing. How much do you think was spent? >> $600. in Oh, wait. We just ended September. Mhm, yeah, maybe like a thousand. Yeah, $3,410.02.
Yeah, you're. broken. You You don't know anything. about your numbers at all. >> No. You don't know your day. You don't. know your spending. I just spend. believe that 2,600 that. came in anymore, and now it's not. Wait, why am I Okay, Colton's texting me. that you can't get a bartending. certificate or license. I mean, >> Why? I don't know. Well, because you haven't. paid for the full class yet. >> that's true. I mean, but I I took the classes, so I. did learn.
And I also have my TB TABC, so I mean, it kind of balances out. >> Yeah, how many bartending jobs have you. applied to? And what's on your resume. for the bartending jobs? >> I have it at the bottom of my resume, the accounting assistant certificate and. the bartending license. Uh-huh. And. what's your job experience showed for. the bartending? Nothing. Just the. classes were taking? No jobs. No jobs are listed there? No. On your bartending. on the resume to apply for jobs? No. So, you're showing 29 years old, never. worked a job in your life.
>> No, I mean, I have my jobs, but not for. bartending. >> Good. What jobs? Oh, I mean, the one. that I had. Yeah. So, you know what's. going to happen, right? Because. unfortunately, bartending would be a big. switch, cuz you don't have that. experience. I'd take the accounting. thing off at the bottom for the. bartending jobs, and I would try to. curate and slightly manipulate your. resume a little to navigate towards the. bartending, cuz what they're going to. see is they're looking for what they're. going to see is that they would hire. you, and you're going to be there only. for a couple months because you would. leave to get the job you actually.
wanted. You have to curate to the job, make it look like you want to stay, like. you want that job. You have to play the. game. Okay, okay. I'll do it. I'll try. Mhm. Okay, big guy. What do you think your financial score. is, zero to 10? Zero being the worst, 10. being the best. I give it like a five. In between. Explain. I mean, I like to spend. Most of my bills are. paid,
if I remember. Some of them will get paid. So, I give it a five. >> middle of the road. Sometimes we pay our. bills. What are you? >> a Leo. I don't even know I don't know. when that is, and what comes with it. It's an August. >> Well, if you want your financial score, take. the assessment. It is free at. calebhammer.com. Just takes you a few. minutes. You can see where you stand, where you need to do better, where you. are doing pretty well. And if you don't. want to be like a guest on this show, make sure you download the Dollarwise.
budgeting app. It is my preferred. budgeting app. Sign up for the free. trial, and if you like it, sign up for. the annual version to save a ton of. money. And if you do, I will sign. personally. budget my budget-friendly cookbook, and. I'll mail it directly to you. And that. is going away in just a couple months, so last opportunities popping up now. dollarwise.com to learn more there. Okay. I'll jump into these documents. Okay, this financial one. Yeah, you have it. I. mean, I see.
I see things on here, and again, you. can't afford to take care of this. animal. It's very selfish for you. So, you just have one dog, right? At least. >> Mhm, no. No, cuz you said you have a few. cats. What What's the animal situation? Dog-wise, so personally, I have one dog. But I did have other dogs, but I kind of. Yeah, I kind of gave them to my mom. Pushed them to the side. I have. >> want them? No. Is she managing them? Yes.
I mean, but the dogs love them. >> You just dropped three dogs off at the. house and said, "Good luck." Four. Four dogs. >> Four? >> Mhm. Two Chihuahuas, >> Did you have these dogs? You can't. afford to take care of yourself. It is. so selfish and disgusting of you. >> I wanted the dogs. I wanted inside dogs. >> do it? You're selfish. You're nasty. You're disgusting. Well, they didn't. want to be inside. They wanted to be. outside. What? So, I kind of just pushed them to. my mom. Huh? What does that have to do. with anything? Well, them being outside.
Yeah. >> Yeah, take them on walks. Walk them to. being a. dog caretaker, owner, whatever the [ __ ]. you want to call it, parent. >> Beforehand, when I had my apartment, before all this, way back when, I would get. >> What, 2 years ago? Uh, maybe. Yeah, yeah. >> Yeah, way back when. I would get dogs Well, I would get a dog. and I wanted them to be inside dogs. But they wouldn't want to be inside. So. >> Yeah, dogs like to go outside. No [ __ ]. you [ __ ] tit. Yeah, so I just gave.
them to my mom. And then the cats Yeah. Cats were kind of. friends would give me cats and I would. kind of just give them to my mom. Her house is bigger than my than my old. apartment, so. >> feet? Huh? How many square feet is her house? I have no idea. How many bedrooms and. bathrooms? Um five bedrooms, two. bathrooms. Um Just cuz it's that many. rooms it's not a big house, though. Not humongous. >> That's what I was assuming with two.
bathrooms. Yeah. And your it's just loaded up with. animals that you can't take care of to. save your life. Um. It's very selfish. I mean, they're fed. >> So what is your debt payoff strategy, Ben, if anything? Uh so, my goal, I. mean, is to be debt-free by 2026. Good. Yeah, but how are you supposed to be. accomplishing that? By what my mystic. had told me. When we had one of our sessions, she. kind of read my cards and told me by. 2026 I would be debt-free. The cards.
said that? You know, you know what. actions you actually have to put in. It's you building a budget, following. it, making sacrifices, and going out and. getting a killing. Oh, dude, it it's not a card, it's what. your actions. It doesn't just happen to. what? You're going to win the lottery? You're going to get hit by a car and. you're going to be able to sue for a lot. of money? Like what's going to happen? What was the What What did the cards say. was going to happen to get you there, big guy? I mean, the cards just read. that I would be debt-free and successful. in the year 2020 26, sorry. How?
Which by the way is only in a few months. when it starts, but how? Everything is. possible. >> HOW? I DON'T KNOW. MAYBE. >> WHAT'S THE STRATEGY? I can do Only Fans. No, you can't. Oh. What do you mean no? You're You're not that guy. Try me. No. No, thank you. You are the Hispanic. puffier cheek version of me and gay. Look, we both have better foreheads. Put. on Put That was my That was my uh gayer.
haircut before I started doing perms. You You look You do look like the. Hispanic gay puffy cheek version of me. You're not that guy. The better version. You're not that guy. I am. I'm a bad [ __ ] Put this on. Oh my god. Don't touch my glasses, animal. Now, editor, bring in when I had this. haircut. Bring in when I had this. haircut. Even with contacts, the fact. that I can see with your glasses. Victor, that's me, cuz I'm committing. crimes. What can you not see without.
them? Um. my contacts. What is wrong with you? You're not wearing them? Yeah, yeah, I. am. Give me. Give me. So we're twins. No, you're the puffy. taco version. >> My twin flame. There we go. Huh? Twin. flame. We're connected. >> I'm just saying you're not that guy. I'm. not that guy. We're not that guy. I am. that guy. You're not that guy, pal. Trust me. You're not that guy. No, you. would not be able to post hole. No one's paying for hole. I mean, I.
already have it. I know you have hole. >> No, OnlyFans. And how did you know this? Colton didn't. even know this. My bad. I mean, I don't. really I mean, I post on it. >> Nothing. Aha. So that's your strategy is. to keep posting on the thing that brings. in zero dollars. Is it literally zero? Uh I think I have like 20 bucks on it. right now. What is that? Two subs? Yeah, I think so. No. I think it was one. Just. reoccurring, though. Someone who forgot.
to cancel. Someone who was curious a. long time ago and didn't forget. I still. get paid for it. No [ __ ] but it's not. like actively going for you. What? You're just every once in a while. posting a hole for him? I mean, I also. have plants that I sell. It's probably. the mystic, isn't it? No. She's lesbian. Uh-huh, but she's. supportive of her boy. Of course. But yeah, I also do sell plants on the. side. Is that weed? So that kind of helps. Is.
that mean weed? I'm not a crackhead, okay? Well, it's weed, not crack. Um. still. No. I'm also, you know, taking the. Hispanic nature of things. Wait. Oh. No. I sell plants, just regular plants. And? I have 350 plants. So. I sell a lot of those. And? I mean, that's some type of money. How much? I. mean. Some of them like $5, $10. Shut up. So I.
can't add it to this. I mean On my. [ __ ] average, how much? Maybe like 100 bucks. I can't believe that. It's still money. You What What is your. fake little laugh after everything? It's. obnoxious, to. It's fun. No, it's not. It's your You. know you're in a podcast. Every single. cent Every single second of audio is. being recorded right now and you're just. making little goos. constantly.
Okay. I'm not giving him a second person to. sign up for that OF. I'll tell you that. Oh. We can try. You can certainly try. I'll post more. No. You're not that guy. Capital One Venture One. Mhm. $2,083.29. Minimum due $149. I think it's usually. what? 75? Because that is probably. amplified due to. a past payment. Now, why? Now, why?
WHY? Cuz you're getting unemployment, you had money, you're making money, you. but you. Your parents cover everything, your. grandma GIVES YOU MONEY. WHY? WHY ARE. YOU late on a $75 payment, which is now. doubled to 150? Why? Well, because. I took a trip to Chicago. Who the [ __ ]. are you to think you get to Is that. funny? I mean, I had to go see Lady Gaga. No, she's not coming to Houston. Well, now. Oh, no, she's coming to Austin and. Dallas, not Houston. But beforehand, she. wasn't, so I had to go see her in. Chicago.
Great concert. >> While unemployed? Yeah. You're a joke. Got to have fun. No, you're a. joke. No. That's not a joke. You're a joke. You're a child. You do not get to. splurge, go to a concert when. unemployed, and you owe money, and. you're living off of your. grandmother. You disgusting creature. Who are you? What kind of entitlement. piece of [ __ ] is in front of me right. now? What is wrong with you? Nothing. You don't get to go to Lady Gaga, certainly not across the country.
South to north. It was fun, though. I'm. I'm sure it was, you disgusting beast. >> I mean, the tickets were already paid. for. I just bought the plane ticket and. the hotel. >> much was the plane ticket? Um like 300, 3 400. You're You're disgusting. You. borrow almost that much from your. grandma a month and you take that and go. to. Chicago for Lady Gaga. That is disc. Dude, are you not recognizing how.
disgusting that is? No, cuz I went to the hot fun. >> [ __ ] Well, I have to live life. No. You can live life when you afford to do. it. You are stealing from grandma to try. to make it sound like you're paying the. bills and then you're taking a flight. You're a disgusting. selfish. piece of [ __ ]. I'm being candid right now. You are a. bad person. Well, No, you're a bad person.
Well, I have to HAVE FUN. >> A BAD PERSON. I need you to know you are. a bad person. And that's okay. You're. accepting of it. You're okay with being. a bad person because it's not like. you're impacting a random person on the. street, this is your grandmother. Well, I know she has money, so I mean. >> Oh, wow. Wow. Oh my goodness. If I don't have it, I can ask for it. >> Wow, you're horrible. You're a degenerate.
You are horrible, man. I'm not saying this as an insult. I am. saying for you to know. If no one has. ever told you the truth and reality. about you being a dog version of a human. You're a bad person. I mean, not really. No. Go ahead. Tell me how. And what. rebuttal would there be? I mean. I mean, I still help out. So.
>> Yeah. >> that bad of a person. >> Tell me you still help out. I mean, like. when she asks, like if I could take her. to the doctor's office, I'll take her. Or she has a cat, too. She has two cats. What? So if they need help to the doctor. you think is worth manipulating her for. money? Because you tell her you're going. to pay your bills and then you don't, and then you fly to Chicago with the. money or give it to your friend who you. pay to be your friend for 15% a month of. your Well, past income. I guess that. doesn't even count anymore. You're a. piece of [ __ ].
And then the lodging and food, how much. did you spend in Chicago? Um maybe like. 6 700. That was the hotel, the Ubers, the food, going out. >> Yeah. >> 1,200 to 1,300 on this trip while. unemployed and getting the money from. your grandma to pay your bills, and then. we look and you're behind on a credit. card so that you can go to Lady Gaga in. Chicago. Gross. Again, it was fun. No.
Oh my goodness, I don't I don't I don't. What do I do with someone like you? Um. I know it was fun. No one's arguing. that. I want to be clear. And I also. want to be vehemently clear. I actually. want you to go. I have another concert. this week, too, actually. Where? This Tuesday. >> Where? Where? >> How much did you spend on it? I think that ticket was like 120. >> Marina and the Diamonds. Like pop music. And when did you get it?
Mhm, I think right before I got laid off. It's a little more reasonable. Listen, you probably still couldn't have. afforded it. But I want to be again. clear as day. Mhm. I want you to go to. Chicago to see Lady Gaga if you want to. But only if you do not have any bad debt. because that is holding you back in life. and creating risk over your head that. you are now realizing because you had to. move back in with family because you got. laid off and you did not actually set.
yourself up for any type of success. whatever. And only when you can fit it. into 30% of your income because you are. at minimum contributing 20% for. retirement. After that, I want you to do. it. I want you to blow 30% of whatever. the [ __ ] you want. It can be anything. >> I have another concert to go to, also. That was in November, though. That was. in Dallas. Plus the whole hotel. >> next month. Yeah. Don't try to bring language to it. like it's the.
a year from now. It is next month. Mhm. In Dallas, meaning you are spending gas, you're getting food, and you're likely. getting a hotel. Oh, yeah. From grandma. You're disgusting. That's how I bought. the ticket. No. To be very clear, Mhm. you are one of. the worst people that has sat in that. seat in a long time. It's okay. No. Like some of my life, though. Deep down. person. I've had people that annoy me. for various reasons. I have had bad. debt. You're one of the worst people to.
sit there. You are disgusting, manipulating your grandma for money to. pay your bills, and you don't pay your. bills, and then you go to Chicago. >> my life. You. You shouldn't even be getting help right. now. You shouldn't even have me go. through your finances. So if people. weren't enjoying this episode, I would. stop it right now and I'd tell you to go. [ __ ] yourself. But instead, I'll tell. you to go [ __ ] yourself, but I'm going. to at least keep going. >> And I'll put it on OnlyFans. Let's talk. about phone bills because why are we. still paying $100 a month just to check.
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You do not. Yes. What Why do you have to? It's Dom Dolla. I have to go. >> Okay, that means nothing to me. Why do. you have to go, though? Because he never. comes. So I want to go see him. Is this true, Brandon? You like DJs? Brandon's saying. no, and he lives in Dallas. You don't. know what you're talking about. It's Dom Dolla. You are wrong. He played. ACL, and then he played afterwards at. Emo's. I didn't know that one. I know. ACL cuz I went there. You are wrong. >> That's why I want to see him again. So it's again. So you're not even right.
It's not that he never comes. He just. did Austin City Limits last year. >> Austin ACL Austin. City Limits City Limits. >> music festival and then went to a club. afterwards. I didn't know that one. You're a piece of [ __ ]. You're lying. I'll have to go see him. >> to manipulate me about how this is a. once-in-a-lifetime thing when you've. already done it. Shut up. So. I want to see him again. I actually had tickets to go to ACL.
for next weekend. So you're getting hotel for 3 days cuz. there's no way you're driving from. Houston every day. For No, not ACL. I'm. not going to ACL. I want to. You You. just said you were. Are you. No, I went last year. I said I had tickets for next weekend. Not anymore, though. You sold them. Mhm. Why? Mhm, I really didn't like the. lineup. That's why, not cuz he was.
trying to be a good person. Do you realize what you are? A bad You a. bougie [ __ ]. Bad. I need to go to concerts. 13 years to pay this off, minimum. monthly payments only if you don't. purchase, and you're not even making. your minimum monthly payments, and. you're certainly not purchasing cuz. you're over the limit by $83 and 29. cents because you don't make payments. because you're selfish, irresponsible,
and a child, and immature in every way. whatsoever. Okay. Yeah. You better There's no disagreeing with. that. It's impossible. >> What? Now you say you got to spend. This. makes no sense. Every time there's. anything you've ever done wrong, it's I. got to. Yes. Why do you got to? Because I want to go out, SO I HAVE TO. >> NOW YOU GOT. YOU WANT. Same thing. No, it is not. You need to pay your. electricity bill. You want to go get.
drinks at the bar. They are not the same. thing. So I got to go get drinks. You. are a spoiled brat whose mommy and daddy. and grandma have enabled his or they. them's lifestyle they them's entire. life, and you're a [ __ ] freak now. You're a piece of [ __ ] who's a scourge. on this planet that we should honestly. lock up. You're welcome. Keep you away from the rest of us. Well, not a homophobic thing. I just mean he's.
a piece of. To be very clear, so I know some people will read that out. of context. You're just a piece of Anyone that takes. advantage of their family like you. go to the dirt. Not death. [ __ ] you. You hold the rest of us back. You hold. back the human race. You're nasty. No. I'm fun. No. Cuz this is the least least. fun 47 minutes I've currently sat. through in months. Well, you're.
horrible. And I'm making sure I reiterate that. over and over again cuz I don't think. people have told you that enough in your. life. I have 29 years to catch up on for. that. You can say it. I'll just say I'm. >> you dumb Have you been listening? It's. okay. Right. Past due. Total interest this year so far, almost. 500 bucks at a 28.99% interest rate. Some Sometimes people say I'm too mean.
I just don't think so. >> isn't warranted, I don't know what is. Okay, what is this? Afterpay, Affirm, what? >> What am I looking at? What are you affirming while living at. home with your parents and being enabled. by them? Uh, let me see. I have a couple Amazon. orders. Um. >> Ticketmaster? I did Oh, yeah, Ticketmaster. >> Well, technically, yes. What? Well, because. >> That one What? That one's for Tuesday. So it's not just me myself going, it's. five other people, but I put most of the.
payment down. So my payment's only $5. What? You Huh? Splitting that payment between. all of us, I I had to split it. >> month or whatever? >> Yes, yeah. So they gave you money to. make the payment. >> Mhm. Let's hope they don't [ __ ] it up. No. Pull up your Affirm. Let me see. You owe a total of $2,029.91. What do you do? Okay, I have it up.
Do you want to see it? Amazon, I don't remember what I ordered. from there. Oh, wait, it went blank. Let me see. Oh, it's a 29. 24 It's a $24. and 36 payment a month. You are losing interest like crazy. I. know for a fact with a payment that low, you're at about 36%.
interest. Amazon. Not all the orders are mine, though. It's always convenient, >> but I can tell you which ones they are. Wired earbuds. They look like Apple. ones. They're not. Yeah, that was my. fault. I thought they were. You really. are. Well, my bad. I just clicked on the top. one. Oh, you're usually supposed to be. Ooh, okay. Okay. We should keep you at home. No, I should be out here. >> move out. I think I deserve it.
You got to. break the soil. Like I said, most of. them are not mine. Nut milk bag. That. one is mine. >> Classic juice bottle. Mhm. Omega-3 fatty acids. Cruise essential flat plug. You're not. going on a cruise, are you, [ __ ] No. Could. It's an outlet, not a cruise. Oh, the brand is Cruise Essentials. Fuel pump mounting plate. Marshall cat water fountain. Yeah, you. definitely didn't have water for them.
ever before, right? Absolutely, you. don't need to get that right now. Black satin fabric by the yard. Uh. some. a screw eye pin screws, 100 piece. nursery growing bags. We know that's you. and you're certainly not getting a. return on investment. Five pack 10 gallon thickened grow bags. Mhm. >> Great, I'm glad this guy's allowed to. have all these hobbies while not working. and taking from his grandma to go to. Chicago for a Lady Gaga concert. What a.
dick. More nursery bull. Organic dog shampoo. That is for my. animals. >> way than going to the groomer, so I can. appreciate that to a certain point. Obviously, make sure you take care of. them like when they get all matted up or. whatever it's called. Calendar. Yeah, none of us have calendars on our phones. Privacy iPhone sticker. Endless endless. cat litter. For all the cats. >> Not ordinary. Got lots of The Ordinary. skin care. Lots of The Ordinary skin.
care nourishing oil to foam cleanser. It's not working, buddy. It's not. working. And two, there's no point. anyway. You're scrunching your forehead. so much you're going to look like you're. 80 at 30. It's okay. That's what Botox is for. Which you have. not done in a preven- preventative. matter. It's okay. I can still go get it. >> Sure, everything. Okay, great, wonderful. You got a daily planner. Again, definitely don't have no apps on. our iPhone. Endless bags of cat litter. Lots of plant stuff. You got a fan. I.
mean, this is like you don't need to be. doing this hobby right now. You don't. You don't Let's get your subscriptions. while we're here. You don't need to be. doing these hobbies right now when. you're sitting there manipulating your. family. It is disgusting. You should be spending all your time. curating your resumes for the specific. jobs that you are trying to do, which. you're not even doing for your. bartending job. I thought it was just. one resume and that's it. I mean, it's on there that I had to have. I did the bartending classes. Apple.
Music iCloud Plus. Had Audible, had. Instagram a couple times. Multiple. different No, he's paying for a few. Yeah. Instagrams. He also You know what. he's paying for? Unfollow tracker. He's. following who's unfollowing him. What. are you, a middle schooler? Well, I got to unfollow if you're not. going to follow me. Such a Yeah, I told you he was a petty. [ __ ] gay. I told you. I know the. And then Face Shape uh High Face Face. Shape Finder. I think that was an.
editing app. I know you need it. I think. not for that. Oh. Colton's calling you a. plant gay. That's true. I forgot I. forgot that term. >> Yes. >> that term. You are a plant gay. You. can't afford to be a plant gay right. now, though. You can't. It's not the time. You should be spending all your plant. gay time on gay applying to jobs. I. mean, I apply to jobs. Yeah, not in the. way that is obviously. >> Five a week. Five a week's a joke. You're a joke. Oh, oh what a disgusting. animal. What a disgusting animal.
I mean, I'm still applying, though. Shut. the up. Not in any kind So, it's not. like I'm touching my dick. >> minimum wage to probably keep. unemployment for a while. Any other kind of benefits you're. getting. You spent over 1,000 hours on. plant seeds. Yes. What? It's a variegated one. What? You want to see? I have a picture. of it. Shut the No. Look. >> Never. Not once will I ever. Look. Care Credit. What happened with this? This is That's for the animals. Because.
you're an irresponsible person that got. animals when you couldn't afford to deal. with them. Yes, who would have thought? >> But I'm taking care of them. Well, that's for the insurance and then you. can't, [ __ ] No, that's not. >> $1,324.88. You can do that one more time and then. it's maxed out and then if they have an. emergency, how the [ __ ] you going to. cover it? Good luck. Good luck to them. Bad owner. No, they got their vaccines. and everything. Minimum payment $44. You. did the bare minimums. You're not able. to take care of an emergency. You're not. able to take care and there will be.
They're animals. They go crazy, especially if a lot of them are outside. all the time. They will eat something or. get injured by something. Like you Well, then we'll ask grandma to borrow money. again. Then they're taken care of. Honestly. I mean, they're being healthy right now. >> I'm talking. >> matters. I'm talking. Mr. Vice. President, I'm speaking. I have I'm.
speaking. Well. I don't know how you are. comfortable. living the life you do, living in your. own skin. Being. this disgusting creature that. >> vibe that I am. No. Yes. Objectively, no. No one that talks about their. grandma like that has any kind of good. vibe. You are a vibe that is a plague to. anyone around you. You and your other. person that you pay, your your your vibe.
queen, whatever you call her. >> Mystic. Bring each other down. No. Yes. Look where you both are. You're both. failures. You do nothing and you're. losers and you manipulate people to get. what you want and live the life you. want. >> Exactly. But fun. I'm living my life. At the expense of others. Yes. I mean, if I want to do it, I have to do. it.
There's a concert I want to go to, I. have to go to it. Even if I have to. >> ever had sex with someone who doesn't. want to have sex with you? Then I won't. do it. So, where do you draw the line? You're okay with using other people's. money when they don't necessarily want. to do it for the things that you want to. do it for? Because you're okay with. doing a lot of things that other people. don't want to do. That is what you said. earlier. Yeah, it's to pay the dog food, cat food, things like that. Exactly. So, where do you draw the line? I mean, they. have food. I was just Oh my gosh, he's. Oh, you're impossible. You might be the. biggest What is he on the line of being. the biggest piece of [ __ ] on financial. audit? >> Yeah, it's to pay the dog food, cat. food, >> Exactly. So, where do you draw the line? >> I mean, they have food. I was just.
You might be the biggest. Where is he on the line of being the. biggest piece of [ __ ] on financial. audit? The farthest. Are you proud of. that? Are you proud of being a horrible, horrendous person? I'm not, though. Yes, you are. You Can you give me anything. that suggests that you're not? Like I said, I mean, I help out. Do. driving her to the doctor here and. there. Yeah, sure, great. You did a. minimum basic responsibility of a. grandson. Well done. >> Take care of her animals when she needs.
it. Once in a while, though. I think I'm a good person, though. Oh my. Yeah, you know what a good person. doesn't do? Mhm. When you're maxed out. on your Affirm, you have Affirm'd via. your brother's account. Oh, yeah. >> And then you're late paying him to make. the payments. And then the Care Credit. him over. No. Yes. Yes, if it's on his credit, his. Affirm and you're not paying him in. time, you are him over. You cannot tell. me no from that. That is That is as.
BLACK AND WHITE AS POSSIBLE. IF you do. not give him the payment in time, you. are objectively. him over. How can you tell me no? >> make the payment, then he will. So, I. mean, the payment's still being made. YOU. YOU. YOU'RE A [ __ ] IT'S STILL. BEING MADE. I can't reason with you. Well. Again, the payment's being made. So, it's not messing him up. Believe it.
or not, from these conversations, ladies. and gentlemen, uh surprisingly as you guys may find it, my blood pressure often does not rise. during these because people annoy me. The debts are crazy, but I've gotten. used to them. I see it. It's normal and. it brings a little bit of outrage, sure, but this I feel my blood pressure rising. more than I have felt in any episode in. a very long time because I am enraged at. you because you are just You're the. worst. You should get it checked out, then. It is rising at this moment. It is.
not high on average. Well. >> know how blood pressure works? No. You're. You are a. I'm living my life. Only because of. others. Mhm. You will never be able to. do anything on your own. You're a. failure. Mhm, no. Please, tell me. I'll figure it out. Oh, that's the evidence we have to suggest. we're not a failure. I'll figure it out. It's okay. I'll go to my mystic and have. my cards ready again. Yeah, bring each. other down. Bring each other down even.
further. She'll point me to the I'm calling your. mystic in the post show. That's fine. She gave me your cards. JL Recovery Collections. I believe so. >> is collection. Yeah. What is this for? $535.65. That's an old credit card. I think that was my first credit card. ever. And why didn't you pay it? I maxed. it out. And I think I had gotten a new car. >> didn't you pay it? >> I think it was on auto pay, but. >> So, why didn't you pay it? I I Because I.
think I lost You don't let me explain. Please. I lost the card and I didn't. change it or update it. So it doesn't. matter. You think. Guys, if I don't have my physical card. on me, I actually can't make a payment. in the app or online. What? >> Well, this doesn't have It didn't have. an app. >> [ __ ] It was just online. Okay, go. online. Again, you having a physical. card does nothing. I just forgot to. change it. No, you just have to make the. payment. It's not about changing it. It's the. payment. Exactly. Well, I had an auto. pay with my old card. Then when I lost.
that one, I didn't go back and update. it. So I just forgot about the. You're not a credit card person? I'll maybe allow you to use the Fizz. card debit card that builds credit. A. lot of people have used that to build. credit in the audience. With you, you're a piece of [ __ ] Almost. I want to give you I don't I don't know. if I want to give you You might be the. first guest I turned down the resources. for that we provide for free cuz you're. a That's why I came to you to help me. No. Mhm. I don't believe it for a. second. Maybe you had that in the bottom of your.
heart, but you're digging a hole. You're putting your pin in the [ __ ]. ground and you're just holding to it. No. Mhm. >> No. Yeah. You just did right there. Yes. Quicksilver. What's going on? That. one. was my second credit card I opened. Yeah, my second one. That one I think is maxed out cuz I.
would go out to. >> It's over maxed out. >> Oh, yeah. Then yeah. I mean, I would go out. get drinks, food. buy things that's online. [Applause]. Okay. How much did you spend on. groceries last month versus how much did. you spend going out to eat? Mhm. Groceries. >> Zero dollars came in. Maybe like 60 bucks.
>> Okay. And going out to eat? Maybe like 400. Why is that considered acceptable at all. for someone unemployed abusing the. family? Cuz I mean, I get tired of eating at. home. I want to go out and eat at a. restaurant. Why do you think your wants supersedes. you just being an adult? Why do you. think that? Where is that stemming from. in your life? >> Because you have to live your life. >> therapy. No. That's what I have my. mystic for.
It's okay. She can read your cards in. the post show. >> 171. groceries. 514 going out to eat. 514, not a crazy. number compared to this show. Zero. dollars of income, laid off, abusing his. family. Crazy number. [Music]. It was good food, though. Doubt it. No. It was nice restaurants. Was it? Look at. your face is drooping. But it was good food. At least my. fatness likes to stay nice and firm.
Yours is just like hanging. You're starting to He's turning into. >> look good, though. He's turning into the. [ __ ]. What What was that? It was like an anime. character who was always like. and like he just sagged. I think it was a dog. I'm a failure. Who watches anime? Huh? Who watches anime? Animated. character. Who watches anime? A lot of. the world. I don't I'm not even a fan of.
it, but like everyone. No. No, okay. Good rebuttal. I don't know what that is. You don't know what the word rebuttal. is? >> No. All right. I'm advocating for opening a camp. that we put people like him in. And it'll be fun. >> How do we determine them? How do we determine what people like you. are? I don't know yet, but we need to. keep you away from this world. But it'll.
be a fun camp, though. This is. and I don't actually mean that to be. clear, but it's just like. it's I don't know, man. There's something wrong with you. You. don't even know what the word rebuttal. means. Like I don't even know how to. deal with that. Like I'm kind of. [ __ ] I'll be honest. >> I'll be honest with you. I'm kind of [ __ ] Like I am dumb in. a lot of [ __ ] things. But I just I'm I'm I'm concerned at your. lack of everything. His face is doing this. This is what his.
face is doing. He looks like this. >> Oh my god. No, I do not. Yes, he does. I do not look like that. Again, like I said, I can just go get. Botox. That's more preventative than it is post. care. >> I mean And you're not And you can't. afford it, by the way. Botox is not I. mean, I'll find somebody to You're. getting back alley Botox. No, not like. that. I said I'll find somebody to pay.
for it. You're horrendous. Listen, you actually had transactions and. interest hit and it pushed you over the. credit limit on this Quicksilver card. So you had $51.91 of purchases. Then $12.20 of interest. McDonald's, McDonald's, H&M. Oh, yeah. There's the good food. >> H&M. Oh, well. it might have been quick food. cuz I rarely go to McDonald's.
Don't even look at me like that. Well, there it is, you [ __ ] You also had a. late fee this year so far. I got that one waived, though. I did. call them and get it waived. No, you you didn't. For this year, yes. No, it's there. Or maybe that might be a different card, you dick. Well, one of them was waived. Great. This wasn't. Well. I can give them a call and No, I highly. doubt it cuz it's not even this month. This is old. It's old. It's been this. year so far.
I still got to give them a call. Yeah, you can give them a call. Then. it'll be under. Good luck. You asked for it and I'm delivering a. way to connect the dots to see how the. stuff we talk about applies to you, your. money, your debt, and your goals. The wait is over because Master Your. Money, my all-in-one personal finance. platform, is finally live. Inside, you'll get access to all of my courses, budgeting templates, calculators, a.
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don't forget to take your Hammer. Financial Score at CalebHammer.com. See. where you stand, where you got TO DO. BETTER, WHERE you're doing [ __ ] Listen, it just takes a few minutes and it is. free. Figure out where you stand in the. world of money, CalebHammer.com. Uh. yeah, give him a call, guy, and do. whatever you think that is. Ask them to. waive the fee. Is that H&M? This Yeah, actually. Mhm. And the jeans. It is affordable. clothing, but I highly doubt you don't. have clothing. I highly doubt you don't have clothing.
I have. Yeah, I do. I bought H&M online. I do buy Gymshark. I love Gymshark. Gymshark. What? What is. it? Like workout clothes. Okay. So that. you can put them in the closet? >> No, I use them. I go work out. Okay. Maybe. 28.99% interest rate.
What is this? Um. let me see. >> you What is overdue? >> Oh, THAT'S. CASH APP. WHAT ABOUT IT? >> DON'T DIE. >> WHAT ABOUT IT? CASH APP, I borrowed that. money I. think to buy plant stuff or plants in. general. Is it Is it the advance pay. type thing? Yeah. Listen. >> Yeah, you take it out of your paycheck. >> this and I will talk about this. Just. like any credit cards, just like. consolidation, just like bankruptcy, even the pay advance stuff is not.
necessarily a bad tool. You can use it. to your advantage. But if you're not a credit card person, you're not a pay advance person, you. cannot use these tools. AND YOU. OBVIOUSLY CANNOT. I CAN. You cannot. Colton can. YOU CANNOT. BRANDON AND. LIZZIE CAN. YOU CANNOT. >> IT WAS GETTING PAID. This audience. LIKELY CAN. YOU CANNOT. SO IT DOESN'T. MATTER. WHY use a tool that is obviously. you? It was getting paid. >> IT'S NOT PAID, THOUGH. SO THAT'S ALL. THAT MATTERS. >> WAS. YES. Why Why do I care about was?
Why do I care about was? Why is was what. matters at all? Cuz there was some. payments made. >> But why does was matter? It is not being. paid now. That Now is what matters. Now. and the future. I don't give a [ __ ]. about the past. Well, it's overdue now. That's what I'm. saying, you dumb But it'll just sit. there. It's okay. Oh, Colton. Colton, never again, please. That's not a joke. You're horrible. You say you come here to get help? I.
don't see it. You're not even willing to. acknowledge that this is bad. Well, the money was used already. I. can't pay it back. >> that make it. What? How are you using that as a. justification? How? Explain to me Explain to me how. that justifies it in detail. In detail, I really want to understand your logic, please. Please. Please. It'll get paid. eventually. >> That's not the logic. That's not the. logic. You said it's okay because you. already spent the money. Explain how.
that justifies it. Well, the money's. gone. Oh, you. You can't answer questions. You can't. answer questions to save your life. You. can't even define your own world view of. moronic. It'll get paid eventually. Some point, someday. >> you have four catchphrases, huh? Sure. Is there like. Oh, you just have to pay that back all.
in a lump sum. There's not like a minimum payment or. anything. It's just like you have to pay. that back. Yeah, I think that one does. require the interest. weekly, I think. Did you type that, Colton? Colton typed. who is a very gay man, by the way, and. we love that. We love that. But, he. typed that he's getting closer to. understanding homophobia. via this episode.
But, yeah, that's my Cash App. Oh, is it? Is it, [ __ ] Shut the [ __ ]. up. Capital One, just the regular Capital. One. What's going on with this? Oh, it's. over maxed out. Who would have thought? Which one? I have three cards with them. >> Shut up. Oh, my Capital. >> We already did Quicksilver. Yeah. I just use whatever's available. No. [ __ ] No [ __ ] And now nothing is.
Mhm. There's another one of your. catchphrases. $202. and $0.29 with a minimum monthly payment. of $25. No late fees on that one, though. We'll see. $82 of purchases, then $5.36. of interest now then because of the. purchasing, put putting it above the. limit. Every credit card we've looked at. so far is above the limit. Mhm. It's.
horrible. I just use it. I'll pay the minimum on it. >> Insightful. Insightful, ladies and. gentlemen. He's. Put him on. the public speaking tour right now. Uh there's been two late fees this year. so far. So, to your no late fees, I say. [ __ ] you. Well, that's probably the one I got I. called to get away. >> One of them I called to get away. >> it is here. If you got one, wait, that. means you've got three and two are. posted. Mhm. Which is probably very.
possible given your situation and lack. of maturity. You probably didn't even know the other. two happened. Yeah, I know. Amazon, vending machine? Oh, yeah. >> Gas, that's okay, but I wouldn't put it. on a credit card that I can't pay off. that is accruing interest and pushing it. above a limit. [ __ ] you. And then I think you got some [ __ ]. potentially a Walmart. I don't know. No. one really goes and gets $19 of. groceries, certainly not someone who. doesn't cook. I can cook. But, you. don't. I KNOW YOU CAN. YOU'RE A HUMAN THAT EXISTS WITH HANDS. I. can cook. I just I'd rather not. I'd.
rather not. >> a [ __ ] I'd rather JUST GO OUT. >> LIKE A HE'S A LITTLE BIT OF AN IDIOT. I. HAVE NOT I DON'T know if I've met a. dumber person created on this planet. Colton, why is he. Sure. How long did your conversations take? Mhm. Talked twice. He had to do two onboarding phone calls. That means you're special. NOT IN A GOOD WAY. NO, you didn't. clarify. I just did.
>> Before. What? With the half a second gap. in between? >> Mhm. Matter of interest as well. Your late. fees above the limit, purchasing on. [ __ ] Nothing's good. The only. purchase that wasn't 100% [ __ ] that. we've looked at so far was gas, but even. that shouldn't be on a credit card like. this anyway. I used to drive an hour and a half to. work. So, that's how I did it. >> you were unemployed, [ __ ]. Shut up. It's at a 31% interest rate.
Congratulations. Really funding my stock. in Capital One. You're welcome. What is this? Klarna. Okay. Confirm to Klarna. That. one was an Amazon. >> Failed payment. Failed payment. Five. days late. FIVE DAYS LATE. THAT was after I got laid off. That was Amazon and. What else did he do when he was after. laid off? Well, went to purchase a DJ. that he never sees cuz he never comes. down, came down last year and he saw.
him. And also went and spent. uh $1,300 IN CHICAGO. DIE. DIE. DON'T DIE, ACTUALLY. I DON'T WANT. YOU TO DIE. BUT, JUST. STOP EXISTING IN FRONT OF ME. BUT, YEAH, THAT'S. >> YOU'RE JUST HORRIBLE. >> Amazon and that was vitamins for my dog. You see, I told you he's taking care of. >> Yeah, I heard it, though. I just don't. believe you. I saw your Amazon result. pop. or plant. Well, I mean, yeah. I have to sell. plants.
You're not selling 141.9. I put you on here. Minimum monthly. No, you're late constantly. YOU PROBABLY. JUST OWE THAT AND THEN YOU'RE DONE, DICK. YES. OH, OKAY. OH, that's my Chase. That was actually for the tickets I. purchased to go to Vegas for a show. What the. [ __ ] Why? When was Vegas?
I think I was supposed to go in March. Oh. But, I ended up returning those. tickets. >> But, then not paying? Yeah, no. I used the money for other stuff. I think it was Vegas and then I don't. remember what the other one is. Oh, Craft Land. That was this place. in Houston that I went to. Aha. And I did the pay in four and I.
didn't make the payments on that, either. >> No, you certainly did not. Um But, I. think that was like from a year ago. >> in Vegas. Mhm. Pay in four. Didn't go to the festival. Paid in none. Paid half for both. >> Uh you're piece of [ __ ]. So, they got something back. >> Shut the [ __ ] up. Something was paid.
Half of Vegas was paid. Only one of four. from Craft Land. So, you can't even. genuinely You can't even accurately. speak on what's happening. Something was paid, though. [Music]. I think that was like last year, though. Okay, so this Chase pay in four, you owe $428.16. Minimum monthly, you only have to do it.
a couple times, dick. I thought it was $171 I owed. No. Do math. I think I did do my math. No, buddy. You. don't know what numbers are. $171.58. is your minimum monthly. THAT'S YOUR. MINIMUM. >> NO, that's total due. No, it's That's. your total due in A MINIMUM WAY. I BUDDY, I SEE IT right here. I off. They'll eventually get paid. Off.
You don't know Shut up. I don't want to hear you. What's this? That was a personal loan I took out. >> Okay. For what? That was back in 2021. I did it to do to do a. >> monthly? I don't know. That one's in. collections. That one I had taken out to go do a lipo. 360 at the time. What? Lipo 360. What? I go to Mexico to get lipo.
Did it work? Mhm. Yes and no. >> suction? Yeah. >> Instead of just dealing with your [ __ ]. I mean, it's You didn't do it again on. your face, though. No. I just got it. here. My stomach area. 2021. I went to Mexico for it. >> 4 L. 4 L. 4 L. Four or five, I think he said. >> pounds is that? I don't know. It was in. Mexico. So, the metrics are different. Yes.
I don't know the metrics over there, but. yeah. >> uh-huh. Mhm. But, yeah, I did it May 2021. Was it worth it? Cuz now it's in. collections, I guess. >> I It was nice when I did it. Surgery kind of went. I woke up during the surgery. I don't think I was supposed to, though. >> consciously woke up? >> Yeah. Did they put you back to sleep? Yeah, right away. Well, that's good. How long. were you awake? Like 5 minutes. And you.
saw them inside of you. Yeah. I felt the. rod going in and out. That's not good. Yeah, I know. I'd do it again, though. Maybe not in Mexico, but I'd go. somewhere else to do it again. Were you. born here? Yeah. We can't send him back. I mean, I'd go back. Permanently? Yeah. I think it's better than the US, though. Good. Totally I you know, totally agree. It's okay. >> Totally agree with you. I'll stay here. because of you. You. You know what? I'll come and move to. Austin next to you. It's okay, we're. moving away. It's okay, I'll just follow you.
You can't afford where we're going. >> Twin. That's why I said we're twin flames. What's this? Another little loan. For I think that one I take off to pay. rent once. Yeah. Okay. I think it was. 300. >> Yeah. It was a two-payment thing split.
in two. It was four payments. I just. missed two. What is wrong with you? Why are you. never able to make any payments on. anything? Cuz I like to spend. Yeah. I like to go and spend. >> gift. It wasn't for rent. >> Oh, there it goes. That's what it was. How do you not even know your own [ __ ]. Mhm. I just take it out and I use it. You're Oh my goodness. There's no words to describe you that. are insulting enough. >> But at least got half the payment. So. some of it was paid.
But yeah. >> Is it in collections or do you owe it? No, I still owe it. I don't think they go to collections. Anything can go to collections pretty. much. Well, that must have been like a year. It's probably in their internal. collections. You owe 175. Mhm. >> up front 175. So put this as your minimum, but it pays. it off.
This is You just wrote everything we've. already seen, so I don't need to see it. Okay. Money owed to Grandma. Yeah. >> Oh, yeah. >> Good. Is she taking a tally cuz she. should. I think the tally on that one. She just gives me money, but you know, I. kind of still write it down. >> Well, I think 21 23,000 I owe her. Yeah. So whenever I would have things. like say my car needed tires, she would.
pay for it or like my trips, you see, she would give me money for the trips. Mhm, let's see what else. Um. Bills, some bills when I would be late I. would ask her for it. But yeah. That's kind of how I racked up all of. this. >> 23,000. to your grandmother. How old is she? She was 52.
Let me see. Mhm. That's incredibly young. Are you sure. you're almost there? >> 73. No, she was born in 52. Oh. She You're taking this from a. 73-year-old woman. I mean, she has. money. >> To for her for her retirement and. survival and medical and whatnot that. pops up. Life, [ __ ]. And her having money doesn't mean it's. going to enable you regardless. 23,000 I'm sure there's no the There's.
no minimum monthly payment on this. >> I mean, I got it from her. She like to. spend, I like to spend. Dad, I see money to Dad. That's 2K. That. was for the accounting assistant. classes. >> What does your dad think of you? Um the best. His favorite child. >> There's not a chance in this world. Like. I said, I do stuff for them. There's not. a chance in this world you're the. favorite. How many brothers and. siblings? I have five brothers. Four.
brothers, sorry. >> mathematically im- impossible. >> Four brothers. >> It's It's not possible. Yes, and one. sister. >> No, you are not the favorite. I refuse. to believe in any world unless they are. literal heroin addicts. >> I can bet you I'm the favorite child. Again, I'm the fun child. You're the. taker. But the fun child. No. Money owed to friend. For what? And how much? >> Ah, Colorado. I think it's one. >> Colorado? W- Oh, yes. I go to Colorado.
once a year also. That's what one of. them were for Grandma. I go to Colorado. once a year and she'll give me money to. go. How much do you owe? I owe her, I think. it's like 111 or 110. It was for gas, the portion of the gas. $111? That's it? You owe that and you haven't. even paid that? >> Yeah. Dude, you're such a. bad person. >> I mean, she really doesn't care, but I. know I have to owe her. We still go out together. You see, I have more friends besides my.
Mystic. No, you just called the Mystic your best. friend. I mean, yeah. I still have more. friends. >> Hyundai. That one is a little tricky. >> Wait, sold the car They repoed? Yes. Not because I wanted to. because No, wait, WAIT, WAIT. >> THAT CAR is That car I had got that car. brand new because I was like, I want a. car brand new so I have no issues with. it. Nothing mechanical wrong with it.
>> But I got that car and it was [ __ ] up. You what? >> IT was [ __ ] up. Back to back it kept. messing up. I even got a lawyer a lawyer. and they didn't do their job right. Yeah, it's It's always anyone and. everyone but yourself. Shut up. I had to. sell it I sold it for 25. Looks like. after fees and everything and [ __ ]. from the 50, you owe 26,811. Again, that car did not work. >> it, have you? No. No, shh. That just. happened this summer. Credit must be Oh. great, it's fresh. It's new. It's going. to be on here forever. Such a first.
repo? Yes. Like I said, the car was. >> it is not. That's my first repo. >> No, it is not. I don't have another repo. You told Colton. >> Oh, the other one. Yeah. That car was. paid off though. My bad. I forgot about that one. So yes, this is my second one. >> Oh. But the first one, I missed that. payment by a week and they took that. pay- that car. IT'S NOT HOW THAT WORKS. THEY WON'T TAKE IT FROM ONE WEEK. THEY. WILL NOT. >> THE PAYMENTS WERE ALWAYS MADE ON TIME on.
that one. >> NOT TAKE ONE WEEK. IT'S THREE MONTHS. >> NO, they took that one right away. >> They took that one right away. Okay. Were you there when that car got repoed? >> THEY WILL NOT DO THAT. >> I was there. Uh-oh. >> That car was gone from that parking. spot. >> They won't They won't do that. Well, they took it. Again, this car was because that car was. messed up. Back to back messing up.
What's your car situation now? I don't. have a car. How'd you get here? >> Oh, I borrowed my mom's car. You're What. a leech. What a disgusting leech. >> Well, I had a car. Uh-huh. $50,000 car you borrowed making 2,600 a. month. Making it 30 a year, you borrowed. a $50,000 car. Supposed to be reliable with you. Supposed to be.
>> Doesn't matter. It's a number that's not. even close to something you can afford. Well, my goal was to go back to school and. make more. >> Oh, so let's get a $50,000 car that we. can't afford. Shut up. What are you. talking about? >> But yeah, that car messed up. We're negative in OUR CHECKING. YOUR CAPITAL ONE checking you're. negative. What are you. This is spending money going to [ __ ]. endlessly and just [ __ ] and vape. shop and KFC Slim Chickens. This is.
[ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ]. Look at this. This page is a [ __ ]. Ladies and gentlemen, top-down camera, GET THIS. [ __ ] HE'S STOPPING and getting some. [ __ ] What are you getting at the. gas station for four bucks constantly? I. don't know. You don't know what you stop at the gas. station and get. >> Probably a Red Bull or something. You. You [ __ ] Get used to getting. >> go before work. Gamer Supps. Take one of. those. Take one of those. Those are free. samples. You guys can get free samples.
Use code Caleb Hammer right now. It's. good. >> Yes, it is good. Listen, once you find. the flavor you like, you get this, you. mix it in. It Instead of a $5 Red Bull. or whatever from the gas station, it is. 25 cents a serving. It's like making. your Red Bull at home and it tastes. better. So I don't want to hear no more. excuses. Link in the description below. for 10% off, by the way. Can I take them. all then? So I don't have to write buy a Red Bull. >> Red Bulls and tacos, of course, and. Amazon and Panda Express getting going. and getting some [ __ ] Amazon.
vending machines, Apple bills, Jack in. the Box, Bunny Stop, Whataburger. [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] tacos. Chicken chicken chicken. Amazon. [ __ ] Then we have McDonald's going. in getting some [ __ ] Vending. machine [ __ ] [ __ ] Look at this, guys. It's [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ]. It is four pages of five pages of. [ __ ] We'll be negative in a. separate checking account as well, of. which I don't even see where the. spending is cuz he didn't even give me. those. What a. joke. You're a joke. You're a bad. person. You. I'm not making a budget for.
you to save your life. Come join the. post show. Three premium shows every. day, Monday through Friday. Click that. join button, including this financial. audit post show that I'm forced to film. You. You're a degenerate and I wish for. the worst of you. Not really, kind of. maybe a little. [ __ ] off. [Music]. It'll eventually get paid. One day. Call your mom and miss the. payment. Let me see. What the [ __ ] is. wrong with you? What is wrong with you? >> Every single piece of advice that you. are giving him is leading him to the. hole of. [ __ ] destruction and death.
>> That's up to him and what he chooses to. do with my words. >> He's a degenerate disgusting animal. >> No, his path is leading him into a. spiritual journey. >> Caleb, is this your least favorite. episode in a minute? I'm cool. Mhm. I. was staring at that clock. >> Hammer Elite is the best YouTube. membership on the platform and I just. upgraded it. Three exclusive dedicated shows every. single day Monday through Friday. Join. with the link in the pin comment or. description below. This is the best membership you'll ever.
join. That's a promise.
