Financial Audit's Biggest Piece Of Sh*t

bombaxing. What are you doing? >> So, um I'm [laughter] getting money from. the government. >> But you have a job that doesn't make. sense. How are you getting money from. the government? >> I lie. Sometimes like I'll take a lot of. aderall and I'll like myself off and. like I'll lose so much weight from doing. that. And it's [ __ ]. >> what? Wait, how often are you [ __ ]. >> At least like twice a week. >> Dude, this is very illegal. >> I don't give a. >> Okay. So, why were you banned from Venmo. then after having sex with this? I end. up just refunding it saying it wasn't. me. I just like go homeless maxing when.

I get blacked out drunk. It's kind of. fun. It's called being a loser, dude. >> This is real money. You know what I. mean? >> I'm not sure I can say the n word, but. you've been running out of. >> Merry Christmas in July. I'm in a giving. mood. Even for you naughty ones. Budget, debt, investing, real estate, all of it. 50% off right now. Not sure where you. stand? My new and improved hammer quiz. does the dirty work for you. 2 minutes. and you'll know exactly how naughty or.

nice your finances look, plus next steps. based on your score. Take the quiz, then. take advantage of 50% off and finally. fix your finances for good. Ro Suave 24 Austin, Texas. This is. Financial Audit. Quick and easy. Well done, Rico. Uh, thanks for coming in. you know, the. internet lovehate relationship with the. Rico Suave. Uh me personally, more of. just a hate relationship with the Rico.

Suave. You. >> didn't feel that last night. I'll be. honest with you. There's no hate. relationship with me and your mom. Tell. you that. Let's just say there was a. little bit of back return there too with. the taxes. Not going to. >> You're into boomers. >> Of course I am. They're the greatest. generation. Isn't that what they say? >> I think they call the greatest. generation the greatest generation. I. think they call your mom the greatest. generation. I might be your I might be. your dad now. I'm not gonna lie. >> Is that how it works? >> Yeah, how that works. I'm I'm your dad. >> And as your dad, >> okay,

>> I'm going to punish you. You've been. very mean to our our precious Togei. Okay. >> What? I was nice to to. >> doesn't know who you are, little bro. >> Okay. Okay. Let give it a second. Okay. Quiet. It's time out. Time out. Time. out. Time. Thank you. >> I'm giving you time. Go. >> All right. So, you were so mean to. Togei. He sat in this little seat while. you ran. >> And with that, here's the recap of the. last episode of Rico Suave. >> Well, I got fired. So, uh they have a. company card which you use for the the.

guests. >> Oh, >> you know, if you want to get them like a. little gift or something, but in my. case, the gift was to me and it was uh. chicken nuggets. >> You still have that credit card? Did you. give it back? >> Allegedly, the company card is still on. my iPhone still. Allegedly. >> Off. If you're a piece of. >> We know that you have paid women and. still do for intercourse. >> I wish. >> No, we know that cuz you've told us that. your weird rebuttal to it cuz you don't. know what to say is that women pay you.

for sex. Meaning that you just said. you're a pro. [laughter]. I mean, if you think about it, I am a. If you think about it, you want to know. why, Caleb? Because I exchanged my time. for money. Just like any prostitute. >> You have no money. [laughter] I have. your bank account. >> Shut up. You're never getting my. contacts. I never want I never want to. interact with you again after this. >> We'll talk about it. Don't worry. >> We will not We will not This will not be. discussed. >> You don't know that. You don't know. that. >> I do. I have control of my life.

>> Whatever. Whatever. >> Okay. So, what did I do to your precious. Togei? >> You will never know who you are. >> Scream like a like lunch lady like. lesbian. Like, you spend $1 billion on. blah blah blah. You don't even get this. guy healthcare. Ah, like. >> I scream like a lunch lady to every. guest ever, including you last year. >> What do you think happens? That's the. show. >> It's just your mom screamed to me last. night. I'm not going to lie. >> You got one bit, huh? Got one bit. I. don't think she'd someone that got fired. from Tesla. >> Look, well, I guess her standards are.

pretty low. Um, same thing with your. >> Who gets fired from Tesla working on the. line? What's wrong with you? You're. pathetic. >> We got our challenges here, okay? But I. tell you what, the challenges of working. for you, I saw the wage sign of 725 an. hour or whatever the hell that is. 725. an hour by the bathroom. No. >> Where the is that? Oh my god. >> Out there the thing you have to have. here. Insert the picture now from our. hallway. The thing you legally have to. have that says if you are being paid. lower than this, report it because.

you're being paid under the federal. minimum wage. Yes, you have to have that. in your business. >> Get this guy. Okay, get this guy. Okay, this guy pays his employees 725 an hour. and like it's like, "Hey, I want to go. get a pizza. I want a a little. schnitza." Okay, but then this guy over. here gives you scrap metal for your. breakfast and then he tells you you. can't go spend, you know, 15 bucks at. Taco Bell. I'm I'm sorry, but is this. not 2026? I mean, Jesus. I mean, I. thought gentrification came to Austin. Apparently, it hasn't came to you yet.

Let's get some Let's get some on the. upper echelon here. Okay, man. What are. you doing? I guess that cookbook ain't. doing doing too well. But I'll tell you. what, this is You're already cookbook's. free. >> The cookbook is free. Makes sense, >> Ro. What do you do for a living? >> Jobs don't matter. Okay. >> Okay. Well, they actually do in order to. pay even at 725. >> Okay. Do you see this cup here? Your. little sponsor. In fact, I actually met. the guy at the bar that is affiliated. with this company. You see what this is? >> I'm affiliated with that. >> Some people look at this as like it. holds liquid, right? And that's the.

people inside your in your little. company over here, what they call hammer. media. Well, I'm about to hammer it to. the ground with this little analogy. They want to leave, man. They only want. to escape. You know, nothing stays. inside [music] of container. It only. wants to go home, right? And I want to. go home, too. >> Where's home? >> Um, uh, Austin. >> Well, you are home then. So, your. analogy makes no sense. Where are you. trying to get to? Rec. >> I I guess I did not get realize I was on. the the the grammar nasty show. Okay. Jesus Christ. the grammar. So, you're. making an analogy for your life and then.

you concluded with you're trying to get. home, but your home is here. >> I thought Are you like a music. composition major or some [ __ ]. >> Yes, I'm a major at 30 when I haven't. been in college in 18 31, sorry. When I. haven't been in college in 9 years. Yes, that's my major. >> Okay. Were you like bullied as a kid? Cuz I could see it a little bit. >> I was unfortunately. >> Unfortunately, >> believe it or not, from this show, more. so the bully. >> The bully. Yes, >> that makes sense. You know, >> I changed my ways. Now it's just bully.

for financial reasons. >> You know what's funny? I think we've all. seen the story before, people of the. audit uh financial audit world. Anytime. there's a big bully, there's a little. there's a little one inside, right? You. know, and so you just got to poke the. bear a little bit. >> Big bully. There's so there's a little. bully inside my big bully ass. >> Yeah. Yeah. You you dress behind those. whatever what those 5'4 club clothes. Whatever. >> It's made Well, what the issue? >> What is that? I don't know. >> Clothing brand. It's fine. >> You look like you're Moroccan or. something. Are you You're.

>> Moroccans are attractive. >> They're okay. What are you You're like. Native American, right? >> Yeah. 25%ish. >> What is it like Cherokee? >> So, how do you make your money, buddy? Cuz that's what I need to know going. into financial audit. I appreciate you. trying to be the host. Um, >> welcome back to Rico Audit. Today, we're. interviewing. >> Buddy, I need to know how you pay your. bills. I need to know anything that's. going on. Listen, you had a leasing. consultant job just last week. >> Yeah. So, cuz we don't allow people to. come on who don't have a job. Now, you. would be more of an exception cuz this. is a follow-up. So, I want to see where. you are. But less than that, you had a.

job when you when we were talking to you. about coming on the show and you lost it. right before coming here. You had that. last week. It's the middle of this week. What the happened, Rico Suave. Did you. steal money on their credit card like. you did last time? >> Okay, I'm trying to bumax right now. here. Okay, Mr. Mr. Hammer. Whatever. your middle What's your middle name? >> Joshua. >> Joshua Hammer. Well, guess what? I don't. know if there's a a book on Joshua in. the Bible, but if it's anything like. Noah's Arc, it's about a you know, you're you're going to need a ship for.

this one, baby, because I'm going to. you're going to need something to save. you. Okay. I'm trying to bum max, baby. Okay. I'm taking federal. >> for a half a week. >> Half a month at least. I'm. >> It was last week you had this job, buddy. >> I never got fired from it. >> Did you just leave then? >> I never got fired from it. >> Did you just leave then? >> I don't think I did. I was I was. >> So, right now you're on payroll. You're. not showing up and you will be fired. soon. >> Maybe. That's it. That's the thing. >> Okay. So, you'll probably get another. paycheck. What are you getting from this. job currently? >> 1 $1,400 bucks every two weeks.

>> There you go. Not okay. Well, you know, for you. >> For me, it's not bad for me. >> That's what I'm saying. >> What do you make? >> Call $3,000 a month. A lot more than. you. >> You see this guy? He's like walking up. in here with his little Moroccan get. dude. The rest of the employees here. like begging for lunch, you know? I see. I saw a lunchment. I saw I saw uh Mr. Club Penguin over here digging behind. the trash. >> looking for scare spare scraps of pizza. That's because he's fat of our show fat.

and fatter. So yes, fat and fatter. What. is this? Dumber and dumber. What is What. are we talking about here? Jesus. >> Good one, >> man. I can see why I would never. >> So, what's the last time you showed up. to a shift? Well, you were never. offered. >> I never was offered because they. discriminate. That's the only problem. here. They discriminate against not. legally. [laughter]. >> [ __ ]. >> but kind of. >> All right. Somebody Somebody Somebody. Oh, man. You wish. You wish that you're. >> He chugged a beer before filming. No. guest has ever done that before. >> You Okay, let me ask you this. Like,

this guy is a is a half glass empty type. of person. You know, actually, I saw. this in the comment section the other. day. In fact, you probably saw this, too. Caleb Hammer's the type of guy to. show up to a house party and bring his. own six-pack and not share with the rest. of people. He would just like look at. you kind of weird. I don't drink. >> You don't drink? >> No. >> Why don't you drink? >> Well, one, I don't like the taste. >> You don't like the taste? >> That's mostly it. >> Yeah. >> Okay. You like the taste of of lying and. being deceptive and being evil? >> I lied about evil about.

>> What have I lied about? >> How How can you tell me you're not like. an alcoholic with with like that voice. you [laughter] got? >> With the what? >> With the voice you got. The little voice. you got. >> That's an alcoholic voice. >> Spend $15 on breakfast, you evil. peasant. more like a cartoon voice than. an alcoholic voice. >> I was like all I I saw like a big sky. Honestly, I was watching. >> So, what's my evil? If you're going to. call me evil, what's evil? >> Your face. >> Okay, Rico, I've seen, you know, like. this. They're not the best. >> Lindsay Lindsay Lohan here. I love. Lindsay Lohan. We We love her here. Okay, let me finish here. Okay. Okay.

And I don't need any squealing from you. from the guy that looks like the Jack in. the Box uh emblem or whatever. Okay. So, the first thing is here. She showed me. your little Netflix portal. Your little. Netflix portal. It's all his face. This. guy's ego complex is bigger than. >> Is he talking about Hammer Elite? >> Hammer Elite. Your little app. I mean, man, >> or YouTube membership, wherever you. choose to be. >> Yeah. A nice little plug in there, right? >> That's where Fat and Fatter is. Yes. >> Fatter and Fatter show. F. It's a fan. favorite, >> man. I was already thinking in my head.

before you said it. Um, anyways, so your. little app of Fat and Fatter. Yes, >> Fat and Fatter. You should get on the. Ompic. But anyways, here it is. the. little app over here like has his entire. face is like plastered over this entire. thing. I mean like. >> brother they know what Hammer Elite is. They watch the show. You don't have to. sell. >> I appreciate it. But you were saying bum. maxing even though you're kind of making. a job even though you will be fired from. that job soon. What is bum maxing? >> Bum maxing is the art of like not really. giving a anymore. You just like taking.

>> Well, that's not good cuz the show's. about giving up. >> Have you read the book? The book art not. giving a. >> Is it about like literally giving up on. life? I don't think so. >> I mean, man, you say I'm giving up in. life. I mean, got a nice Apple Watch. How many calories have you burned. besides put plugging in to charge that. thing? >> Well, today it's pretty early in the. morning, so not much. >> Yeah, it is. Yeah. Yeah, that's the. other thing. They made me wake up at. like 9:30. You think bumaxer is like. waking up this early? >> No. So, you probably shouldn't be a bum. maxer. >> I should be a bum maxer. I mean, god. damn. I mean, >> my Aura ring has my fitness activity at.

81 as my overall score out of 100. because I'm relatively I I like being. active after work. But here's the thing. I eat like [ __ ] That's my problem. You. can't outwork. >> a bad diet. >> Oh, now you can now. >> I will never touch you. You're hands. >> Okay. You You could touch these hands. once I give you a little little punch in. the face there. God, I could give you a. couple shiners right there. They're. going to make a shine in part two after. I'm done with you. That's what I'm going. to say. Anyways, your little app sucks. >> No. Bum maxing. Stay on topic. I don't.

care. Yes. Hammerly. Great. Great. Great. It's awesome. Check it out. U. buddy. Bum maxing. What are you doing? >> So, I'm [laughter] getting money from. the government. It's been like. >> No, no, no. But you have a job that. doesn't make sense. How are you getting. money from the government? >> I lie. >> You're saying that on camera? Okay. What? What have you lied about? What are you getting, Rico? >> So, like the government I got fired from. my last job. Unfortunately, >> I'm confused. Okay. What? Okay. Because.

you're Okay. He was fired from his last. job a few months ago, but you're. currently at the job where you're making. 3,000 a month, right? >> Basically. Yeah. >> Okay. What was the job you were fired. from, Rico? >> I was a remote salesperson. >> Oh my goodness. That's what we talked. about you potentially doing. >> I know. >> And you're fired? Why? >> Look, it it takes two to tango. Okay. In. this economy, your little $15. You can't. afford a $15. I want to afford my $15. lunch, baby. Okay. >> It was a $28 lunch is what we complained. about. >> $28 lunch. Excuse me. >> Yeah, sure. Two to tango. But what does. you having a lunch to do with sales?

>> Sales. Uh me having a lunch and working. with sales. I I'm I'm not sure what. you're asking. >> Why did you get fired? [laughter]. >> I made a couple inappropriate statements. to HR. Um and uh. >> Well, let's bring in Valyria. >> All right, ladies and gentlemen, welcome. off camera, but on the mic, uh our head. of HR, Valyria. Um so, where we just. handed off, he got fired from a job two. months ago. I asked why he said he made. a couple inappropriate comments to HR. I. immediately paused to bring you in so.

that he can say what he said to HR while. HR's in the room. What did you possibly. say to your HR? >> Uh, honestly, I found her like kind of. attractive. I'm not going to lie. So, like I like the first thing I kind of. said to her was like, "Oh, you look kind. of good today." And she's like, "Oh, thank you." And like I'm I'm a people. person, okay? So, like I like to get to. know somebody, okay? Like you're wearing. the Italian flag. Oh, you're Italian, right? >> He's also an alleged wait, so be aware. >> Alleged. Alleged. Let's let's let's use.

some How about you allegedly get some. more time and a half for your employees? They're working double time for you, man. Anyways, speaking of double time, look at your waistline. God damn. Anyways, I was I was talking to her and. I was like, "Yo, like I love your dress. Like, do you wear that often?" And she. started like giving me this like weird. like shoulder shrug. I didn't know that. >> So, pause there. Pause there. Okay. He. does that to you at the workplace. Well, even even even without him doing all of. that and giving me more information, just as he was describing the story, his.

body language and like even some. gestures here, I'm like, what is going. on? What is going on? >> You got some psychoanalyst here. >> I'm already You're not even friendly. with me like that, but I'm already. feeling like, oh, okay, it's it's. starting to border inappropriate. >> Okay. [laughter] Okay. Continue your. story. What happened next? >> So, basically, I was like, okay, like, do you wear that dress often? And she's. like, no. I'm like, "Man, I really like. to see you that wear that more often.". Right? And then I tried to give her a. little twirl, A LITTLE.

do a little twirl for me, right? And. then she wouldn't do it. And then I was. like, "Oh, I'm sorry." Like, I go on. Sixth Street every weekend. And I was. like, "Yo, Chica, Bonita, Suavasita, come over here, mama." Right. And I'm. >> Yeah. And that's not in the workplace. >> Okay. I know women respect, but sorry, Rico can't flirt a little bit. >> We should be able to look at a little. porn at work. >> I'm sorry. Jesus. Over the camera. Over. the phone. Come on. We like to bring it. home. >> Have you heard of harassment?

>> I haven't heard of that word ever. >> That's why everything's alleged. currently. >> Allegedly. I love that word. >> Yeah. What was the reason for. termination? Harassment. >> Well, that and I mean, I wasn't making. [ __ ] for the company. I was basically. bummaxing. That's where this all. started, by the way. So essentially, all. I had to do was make like 80 dials and I. would just like ring the phone and then. I just hang up before like anything. could like actually take place and then. I would just log it as a call and then. they found out about that. Not to. mention the inappropriate gestures and.

honestly. >> Oh, there's more. >> There was so much more. I. >> Please tell us now. >> I was on the uh basically phone with my. co-workers and they like read your. emails. >> You what? >> They like read your emails. >> No, no, you were what with co-orkers? >> On my phone with the co-workers, right? like like like facetiming on the laptop. or whatever and like I'm just like. talking mad [ __ ] I'm talking like. conspiracies all this [ __ ] and like I'm. an entertain I'm like the showboat man. of of this company, right? Oh my god. >> Yeah, that's what they.

>> No, but like some people like don't know. when you're joking. That's. >> And what else did you What did you joke. about? >> I joked about I'm Alex Jones suck. I. talked I joked about they make the frogs. gay, right? And like I was. >> How long did you last in this job? Wait, were you fired day one too? >> I think it lasted like seven, eight. months, I think. >> Wow. >> Six, seven months. >> Go yourself. >> You wish. We need some Gen Z. I'm like. the youngest guy in here. >> Wait, >> dude. No, Mark. Mark, >> I'm 25. >> I'm 24. You see, they discriminate.

against us. Okay. They We need more Gen. Z in here. Okay. >> Not how discrimination works. >> Yeah. Oh, I forgot. We got the expert on. the here. We got the expert here. Did. you not hear what this guy said to to uh. uh Papacito over here? Yes. He was. stretching this guy. He's working double. time. My my main Mexican over here work. stretching the light trying to get on. this fatso over here. He was like, "Oh, I like to see you stretch more." What. kind of sexual harassment are we working. through right now? I mean, god damn. >> That is true. Put That is true. Put in.

the clip. >> Oh, I like seeing you stretch. [laughter]. >> No. >> [ __ ]. >> Okay. clip was put in. Mark you better. spank his ass. >> Speaking of that micro clip, we're you. you [laughter] could let the audience. know how you feel about that. >> Wait, Brandon said that to me. >> No, it's when you were stretching. [laughter] here, I was like, I like to. see stretch, boy. >> This has never happened before. >> Yeah. Yeah. He sounds like a victim. >> I when you were when you were turning, I.

was like, I like to see you stretch, boy. >> Oh, that's what I missed. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I I couldn't hear him. So, >> that is true. He did not respond to it. even though he was right in front of me. Uh, let the audience know how you feel. about this. >> All right. >> Okay. >> And there it is. >> Okay. Well, I'm glad that. >> there go. No harassment, nothing. [laughter]. >> Okay. So, so apparently it's only it's. only sexual harassment if you're. handsome. Okay. I thought it was the. other way around. I thought it was more. like. >> Mark is handsome. First of all, go. >> I'm sorry, but I thought if you're ugly, you're going to be sent to the goddamn.

uh tuggy. You know what I mean? Like, you're going to be sent to jail, right? So, if it's handsome, it's not a crime. I actually. >> Okay, what else did you do? Uh, I mean, I talked about conspiracies. I flirt. with a bunch of girls. Um, I went on. this like really weird, uh, drug rant. with this random guy from Louisiana. I. was trying to sell. And so, he talked. about how like. >> even catch that. >> Um, >> a client. He was talking to He was. talking to clients about drugs. >> Yeah. >> Wow. >> And what were you selling? >> Yes. >> Again, how did you last our seven eight. months?

>> Yo, I'm not going to lie. A lot of it. was just mental exertion. Like just like. the show where like they beat you down. or whatever. >> How did they keep you around for seven. to eight months? >> How do they I have no idea. I think it's. cuz I'm good. Look. >> What were you selling, Rico? >> Uh advertising, basically. >> Okay, so no reason to talk about drugs, >> dude. There's You got to get to know the. client, baby. Like, and I told you this. the first time. >> Have you ever done. >> Yeah, I've done it. Yeah, of course. Yeah. >> What? No, I was. >> Oh, that was. just practicing. I'm just practicing for.

the client. Okay. I thought we were. doing a social experiment. Jesus Christ. This he [laughter] he sexually harassed. a Mexican. Okay. Jesus. That's That's. incredible. >> Human resources. You're like the human. re Oh my god. Come on. Let's [laughter]. get this figured out. Let's get this. figured out. So. >> fired from the show. I can't I don't. have that authority. But. >> you got this authority. What are you. doing here? >> Oh my god. >> Would we have fired him if he worked. here with these? >> Yes. On day one. I feel like this would.

have come out on day one. >> Diversity one conversation. >> off the pipeline red flags. >> I think we all agreed yes he would be. fired but I brought her in to confirm. you got fired for valid reasons even. though we all agree that yes. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Okay. Thank you Valeria. Thank you. W is. Valeria. Thank you. Thank you. Thank. you. >> Okay. So okay you are fired for valid. reasons. Now what? >> Valid valeria. Okay. I see I see a. little spiff over here. Continue. Okay. >> So what do you do now? What's your. current job? I'm unemployed.

>> No, no, no. You said you have a job. where you're making 3,000 hours a month. >> Oh, yeah. I'm a leasing consultant. My. bad. >> Yes. Leasing consultant. Sorry. I don't. remember. My bad. >> That you have a job? What's a leasing. consultant? >> Basically, like they just like show a. bunch of apartments to like random. people and you do. Yeah. >> So, you're not going to have that job. for long. >> You don't know that. Well, no, cuz. you're not showing up to the job. But. we'll put that as your income for now. Rico. So, Bumax, you said you're getting. money from the government. That is. obviously concerning. What the is that?

>> So, you just got to honestly the. government like they're so slow at [ __ ]. like they don't even know that I'm I'm. technically employed right now. >> Except for when it comes to you owning. taxes to them. Yes, they are very slow. >> Don't remember that being recalled, but. I do remember bumaxing as a credible. source of tax evasion. So, if you look. >> at the camera, look at me. >> What are we looking at? >> I don't You were looking over there. Just look at me, buddy. What are you getting from the. government? Food stamps from a.

Why? Why? Possibly. Poppy has to make some carneasada tacos. once in a while. Okay. I don't know what. you're eating. Why was going out to eat. 30% of your spending then? [clears throat]. >> I have no idea. I just like to go out. >> What the [ __ ]. >> I'm going to be real with you. Your debt. is not the same as everyone else's. You've got your own unique mix of credit. cards, maybe some medical bills, personal loans, and collections. Whatever. Your interest rates are. different. Your payments are different. Your life is different. So why do you.

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pds debt.com/hammer. You suck with. money. So you download a budgeting app. You start with the classic one, wab, but. everyone just deletes it because it's. way too complicated to use. So you go to. every dollar. That's Dave Ramsey, the. personal finance guy, right? Well, they're going to force you to use it his. way. That's [music] not very personal. finances. Rocket Money. They got a lot. of commercials, but they're owned by. Rocket Mortgage. Guess what they want to. sell you in the end. Then there's the. new guy on the block, Monarch. Hundreds.

of millions of dollars of private equity. raising so far. But private equity. doesn't have the best track record when. it comes to private data. That's why I. like DollarWise. Built by these people. just like you, for people just like you. No private equity, no gimmicks, just the. best budgeting app there is. Download it. now. Start the free trial. dollow. wise.com link in the description below. >> Look, look, as a society, ladies and. gentlemen, the people that got angry at. me for saying there's actually no fraud. It's just a conspiracy. You're just.

trying to hurt minorities and poor. people. He's he is a minority. He is a. poor person by his own choices and. actions. Why the are we funding people. like this? We if he can get food stamps, what the when there's someone with even. a slight amount of intelligence, like. imagine what they could do. What the. [ __ ] are we doing? How much are you. getting in food stamps? >> 300 bucks a month. >> I'm going to absolutely. How? This country's We're almost at 250. We're not going to make it out there. >> It's better than your like psycho. military veterans that go in like.

>> Oh, shut up. You're not the guy to talk. about that. You are a scammer. >> If I'm a If I'm a military veteran, why. are you doing like Trump gestures? >> Yeah. Well, no. I'm sorry. You're the. one that trying to get all these like. Fox News tidbits on like, "Oh, we're. employing these people. Were you trying. to get a Fox News. >> invite or something [ __ ]. >> Employing these people?" Yeah. Oh, this. little Trump. Uh uh uh. No. Whatever. Yeah. No. >> What are you saying? >> What are you saying? Anyways, I don't. >> You're doing Trump motions, but then you. like to your body like a gay guy. >> Yo, you you wish I was gay. Anyways, this is this is my dress signal right.

here. This is the I You got three. chances, Hammer. Okay. And I'm going to. tell you what, you got one last. You got. one. until I'mma punch you. I'm going to. punch you in the face. >> I have a button now. And if I press it, he comes in here with a gun. Oh, nice. Let me guess. Your boyfriend. I mean, god damn. Nice job. >> Oh my goodness. You're impossible to. have a conversation with food. >> Where's that little like powder or. whatever? Your little like gamer subs. Your little like You threw that on a. poor guy. >> Right here. Here you go.

>> Oh, you get a free thing of Gamer Subs. I'm not throwing at you. >> Let me see. I want to making your energy. drinks at home. >> Oh god. >> That way. It is 40 cents a serving with. my 10% discount code. Gamer subs. Link. in the description below. Get your free. samples. It's free packets mailed. directly to you with my code Caleb. Figure out what flavor you like, then. get this and you make it home. It's 25. cents a serving. It's like making your. coffee at home. No more stopping and. getting into [ __ ] There you go. We. go. You should call it. Please. I don't. trust you. >> Dragon fruit punch. Oh Jesus. >> Yummy. Don't. Please don't open it now. >> Oh my god. Come on. What do we got here? >> How long have you been getting steroids?

Chinese food. >> How long have you been getting food. stamps, Ro? >> I've been getting it for like 3 months. >> This is for you. Just don't open it now. >> Oh, okay. >> 3 months. But you got fired 2 months. ago. How have you been on food stamps? What were you making in the sales job? >> Like, you know, 13. I mean, I was making. 2,000 bucks a month just on the salary. Yeah. What do we What do we. >> do? >> You get anything else in the government? >> Uh, well, I mean, >> I'm being told you're being you you you. have tried to get the hot meals that are. delivered to homeless people. >> I do. Yeah, I do. >> What? >> Yeah, because I'm hungry.

>> Okay. >> YOU ALREADY HAVE FOOD. >> I SAW AND YOU GO OUT TO EAT FOR 30% of. your spending. >> I saw I saw I saw the. >> Try to stay here, Rico. Try to stay in. this conversation. >> Okay. Okay. Okay. Let me I'm sorry. >> Okay. Actually, what did you say? >> I'm just speaking up for your employees. Okay. What did you see? >> Yeah, they were with me. They were with. me. We were standing in line waiting for. bread cuz this this. >> No, it's impossible, bro. >> They get a $50 a month stipen. >> $50 a month stipen. >> $15 a day stipen. >> $15 a day stipen. And you're over here. bitching about a $28 lunch. Oh my god.

And And we all know how expensive Austin. is. So these. >> You don't have to go out to eat for a. meal. You guys are having to spend extra. extra $8. to spend with $8 if you invest in the. S&P 500 and you're 57 years old. >> First of all, there's five people in. this room. Four of them make over six. figures a year. Sorry for the one that. doesn't. >> You'll get there someday. Keep leveling. up, Mark. I love you. >> You got this. >> Keep leveling up. You'll get there. >> Yeah. Come on. Just let him let him put. his legs on your back. >> They're fine. Plus $50 a month stipen. So, obviously, shut the up. But you're.

if you're trying to take meals that the. homeless people are getting, well, we're. giving you $300 a month in food sense, which by the way, with the HB meal plan. and everything that we have made, mathematically figured out, you can get. three meals a day, meal prepped, snacks, drinks, and desserts. >> And desserts. >> $300 a month. So, >> I think your mom is is going to count. for dessert. I'll be honest with you. So, I go, you're impossible. God damn. Your mom is impossible, too. She showed. me this move or she lays it on my bed. >> Let's try I want to see if you're. creative enough to come up with anything. that doesn't involve my mom or fat.

Okay. All right. Let's Let's see if. you're creative enough. So, avoid those. for a second. That's all you've been. able to say for 20 minutes. >> Why and how often are you trying to get. the hot meals that are meant for. homeless people? >> Every day. >> No. How does this work? Tell me. >> Basically, you go on Google. You just. look up I'm homeless. Need food. And. then. >> you're not homeless, are you? >> Not yet, but I will be soon. We'll find. out. We'll find out. I mean, we got. Hammer Media. >> You are pathetic. >> Dude, you got more square footage. You. got more square footage than the UFC uh.

White House lawn. Okay, >> dude. You're obsessed with the. president. What is going on? >> Yeah. No, you're obsessed with the. president, man. Dude, if anyone's. looking for a Fox News tribute over. here, it's your ass. >> Dude, I've called into Fox multiple. times. Okay, >> you've called into Fox. >> Oh my god. >> Last weekend was one of them. But. >> I I bet. Well, let me guess. You're just. like You're just like, "Yeah, like we. got to like these people spend $28 a. month on lunch and they're lazy.". >> It actually hasn't been about that. And. I'm happy to call in. Some of us aren't. millionaires, Caleb. Okay. >> I got here by working the past few.

years, buddy. >> Few years and hiring Mexicans to do all. the hard work. >> I'm sorry that everyone aren't sick. Aren't we sick of this [ __ ] Us us. Mexicans, including myself included. Even even Lindsay Lohan, Lindsay Lindsay. Rodriguez over here. >> She's not Mexican. She's. >> She is Mexican to me. Okay. She's an. honorary Mexican, >> buddy. Uh and I would call in to CNBC CNN if. they would have me, but only Fox has. called. But either way, you probably you. probably like come in your shorts if you. had Kevin Olirri call you, wouldn't you? You're I'm I'm sure you're into the AI.

data centers, aren't you? You're like. >> into I'm not invested. >> You you would probably like. >> Ro, stay on subject, buddy. So, you go. online, you try to get these meals. >> basically. >> What does that look like? You Google I'm. homeless help even though you're not. Go. on. >> And I say I'm looking for food and then. they have like an automatic map. It's. called Meals on Wheels or some [ __ ] And. you just go follow the truck. You are. taking from people that actually need. [ __ ] You are taking from the resources. stamp resources. You have make 3,000 a. month. You are taking from this. Okay.

Is there anywhere else you take? >> Where else do I take? I mean, I got this. [ __ ] from Texas is like the women. medicated or some [ __ ] I. >> what? >> I don't know how the that worked out. So, >> Greg Abbott, what the are we doing? >> I I thank you, Greg Abbott. Honestly, I'm not going to lie. Love Greg Abbott. He's amazing. >> Yeah, he's giving you women Medicare. [ __ ] What is that? What What happened? So basically like you know I applied for. it and I tried getting cash assistance. I can't. It's basically like Texas women. healthcare. I got like a pink card and.

it has like a health insurance number on. it. >> So I mean I haven't used it yet but I'll. be willing to give you all my free. tampons. Looks like you can use it to be. honest with you. There you go. That's a. new burn. You like that? You like that? >> Oh that's what it is. It's okay. Yeah. We have it here. He qualified for the. free healthcare. His health insurance. card is under the Texas Healthy Women's. Fund. >> [laughter]. >> What the is this? >> What the amazing? >> This is pathetic. >> This is amazing. Look, people like me.

need help, Caleb. And if. >> you you are getting actually all the. help. You're not the one that needs Oh, yeah. Even here we go. You're in income. based housing thanks to my insane. property taxes in Austin, Texas. So, you're being funded for housing as well. You're only paying $500 a month in rent. because we're subsidizing you. That's. crazy. How long have you been in this. income subsidized housing even though. you shouldn't be? you pathetic. >> I'm uh 4 months in actually. Actually, yeah. I mean, maybe you could have I. mean, if he gave me a job, I wouldn't be. in this situation. I mean, God, I mean, I'm That's It's on you. >> Okay. You obviously know that's never.

going to happen. The You just met the. age. >> It's It's on you, baby. It's on you, baby. I'll tell you that. >> Okay. No personal responsibility as. usual, Rico. No one's surprised. Okay. Uh Okay. This is what confuses me, though. If I'm not mistaken, I mean, I. was I I would never talk to you in my. life off camera, of course, but I was. getting updates. Did you you like moved. to Miami or like San Diego and [ __ ]. after our last filming? What What. happened to you since then? >> What did you do? >> Oh my god. I went to Miami like two or. three times.

>> I just went to visit. >> Oh, no. I went f by myself. >> I don't care. >> It was But you moved somewhere. I. thought. >> I moved somewhere. >> Didn't you move to like San Diego? >> No, I want to. I want to. I want to. move. You left Austin for a long period. of time. >> Okay. >> No, I I was told. Don't tell Greg A. Greg Abbott that. Cuz then. >> Oh, cuz you don't qualify. So, this is. like, oh, we can't we have to keep that. secret or else you don't qualify. anymore. Where did you move? Come on. Where were you? Tell me. >> All right. I was in San Diego. >> That's what I said. How long were you.

there? How could you couldn't afford to. live there? I'm sure California even. gave you better benefits than a bum max. out in California. >> Of course it is. Oh, >> I basically just slept at a hostel. Hey, every provider in California that's. paying an additional 13% in taxes, that's where it's this is where it's. going, by the way. Maybe you should move. to here, beautiful, Austin, Texas, >> where we still give him some money for. some reason, >> dude. Like I thought they say the red. states are bad. No, it's this is like. the final frontier. It's easy to like.

>> trip to San Diego according to you was. magical. Why. >> magical? I mean, I had sex with there. I'm not going to lie. Okay, so. allegations stealing from the government. and having sex with what the is wrong. Use the app called private I love that. [ __ ] Yeah, it's an app. It's an app. It's an app. It's a website. It's. anything you want. Europeanbased, too. [laughter]. So, don't tell Caleb's wife. Don't.

Wait, are you married? We're not having. conversations about my life. Private delights isn't a thing. >> Oh, go on Google, type in private. delights. >> Oh my goodness. So, okay. So, you were. just. >> It was fun. >> Which got your Venmo banned? >> It did. >> How? How'd they know? How'd they figure. it out? >> After I had sexual relations without. women, [laughter]. >> well, first of all, okay, well, so you. met up with a woman. Was she attractive? >> Yeah, she was cute. She wasn't mad. >> Oh, I don't know if I'm paying for sex. with someone who's not even like.

smoking, but either way. Okay. >> I think she was like a She was a border. She was a border hopper. Uh, I just met. her over at her apartment or something. like that. Yeah. >> And you went in. What happened? >> I mean, basically, give me the story. >> Here's the funny part. >> No, give me the story. What happened? >> So, I walked in there. Um, like, you. know, she was super hot. I was like, "Hey, let's like, you know, whatever.". And I'm just supposed to like just have. sex with her for like 400 bucks, right? And she was so attracted to me. >> She was so attracted to me. Like, she. >> messages in strippers like pretend,

right? Uh maybe for people like you, but. >> No, I'm sure I'm sure I mean relatively. I mean you're not a bad looking dude. You just are very unfortunately usually. a turn on. But the thing is like yeah, she may have been attracted to you, but. she's not going to give you more. >> God, we should talk to your employees. about what else you say around here, man. Yeah. God damn my employees. >> Yeah. No, your employees are scared. I'm. speaking up for them. We got to. >> M. I'm sorry. >> Union eyes. We got to union eyes. >> Rico, so you went in there. You her. >> raw. No, that was two weeks ago. I did.

But raw. >> No, not in this one. >> What? You [ __ ] up two weeks ago. Bro, >> I did. Yeah. >> Wait, how often are you. >> at least like twice a week? >> No, you're not. Where are you finding. them, >> dude? There's like so many. Like, there's like you literally go private. and you just find some near you. Like, literally, it's the easiest in the. planet. I mean, like, you got 200 bucks, right? >> Dude, this is very illegal. >> It's not illegal. >> Are they But they might be trafficked as. well, which might be immoral. >> I don't give a. >> I'm with legalision if it's okay. But. also, you raw dumping loads. Raw dumping.

loads. I love that. >> That's crazy. No, no. Are you raw. dumping loads? >> No, because then I would that would not. be good. Okay, >> but you're having sex with them without. a condom. >> It happens. Yeah. >> When's the last time you've been tested? >> I think it's actually been like 2. months, I think. 2 months. >> Okay. So, why were you banned from Venmo. then after having sex with this with the. condom? >> So, after I had sex with her, like she. like made me we I [ __ ] [snorts] twice. Straight up. Twice. Shaboom. Shabbang. >> Good for you. And after that, I end up.

just refunding it, saying it wasn't me. [music]. And so I got it I got it completely. free. So I had sex with I had sex with. that woman for free. [laughter] And so. then afterwards, Venmo like did like an. investigation and like they literally. banned me from the app because they. >> Good. >> Yeah. Cuz they thought was they. >> paying for them now. How How much are. you spending a month? We're wait by the.

way guys with his Go ahead. Tell me. >> 1,600 maybe. >> That's insane. So we are funding his. food stamps in rank control so he can. give more money to by the way is how. this is mathematically working. >> It's called it's called funding the gig. worker. I know you give your little Door. Dash driver probably a little spiff. about your cookbook, but I actually. donate to the gig economy. Okay. I'm. >> We donate to you through our taxes to be. very clear. That's insane. So you're. fully admitting to illegal. That's. wonderful. Multiple I wish you did. Didn't you say you would support if it. was legal? >> Log into log into private. Show me.

>> Okay. >> Have a little peek. Have a little peek. Yeah. I I didn't used to go through. people's phones when we filmed with Rico. the first time. And now. it's a different day. It's a different. era. >> You're going to lose your mind. >> There's a lot I want to go through. I'm. going to go through most of it on the. post show in that thing called Hammerly. that he was talking about. Are you in? >> Yeah. >> Well, what are you doing? So, you get. swipe and [ __ ]. >> Okay. Wait, why aren't you signed in? Sign in. >> Sign in. Oh my god.

>> Yes, Rico. So, when your job sees this. and fires you, I think that will be. fair. So, your income will be zero and. we'll probably get you on unemployment, which is actually really pathetic that. we would even do that and support you. like that. Greg Abbott, please watch. this. And please, please, please, please, Greg, >> stand up for my right. >> Get him off the programs. >> This is absolutely insane. >> Take that photo. >> It's his back. I guess that's good. Do. they choose or do you book them no. matter what? >> The city. Austin, San Diego, Miami, Oklahoma. Oo, I like that one.

>> Wait, are you sure? Do you yourself? >> I've asked about it. I've asked about. it. >> Well, why are you getting reviews? >> No, I should I should give you a. discount sometimes. >> Oh, such an incredible experience with. such a beautiful girl. Oh, that's. reviews you did. >> Yeah, >> you're leaving reviews. >> Of course I am. >> What the? You know, I leave reviews. >> Made me crazy. answered the door in her. lingerie and her body is tight and fit. and be Oh my gosh. >> There we go. There we go. >> This is crazy. >> This is good. >> He actually is.

>> Yeah. I mean, this is this shit's better. than your comment section, I'll tell you. that. >> And there she is. That's what he That's. what he's into, I guess. Thanks. No. offense. >> You wish. >> I I wish. What? What do I wish, Rico? >> God, you wish you wish you could have. mamaas like that. >> No. No, it's not. No, I don't. Okay. >> Doesn't that look good? Is that not. something you want to be doing? >> Yeah, dude. You're do this is crazy, man. No. No. Cuz this feels like a quick.

way to like actually like AIDS. >> No way. We'll find out when I get. tested. Maybe. Do you have a. >> call yourself Drake? Here it is. Here's. his email and phone number bleeped out. But hey, my name is Drake. Just trying. to look for a gal. Hope you like my body. pics. Good death. >> Yeah, you like the body pics. I take I'm trying to get to your. messages, but I I don't know how the. site. >> No, you message them like on your phone. or whatever. So, like you just you. basically like submit like a request to. get screened and then you tag your phone.

number, your email, and then you reach. out to them. >> What What is FBSM? >> I don't know what that is. >> Okay, I'm just going to do escort, right? Cuz that's okay. This is crazy. Oh my gosh. Oh, bleep those. Those are. actual tits. >> Oh, yeah. We got some Russian prozies. over there. So, they might get. >> Aren't you afraid of them being. trafficked and immoral? Like, that's why. I want. >> I talked to these women and they say. that they're completely fine with it, >> brother. I think that's true. >> Some of them Some of them got saved from. Ukraine. They were like, "Oh, yeah.

>> Saved by and now what are they paying to. make sure it. >> continues? A hand job or a hand. grenade?" You know, [laughter]. hand job or hand grenade. I'm not going. to lie. So, it's up to them. >> Brother, this is crazy. I bet you've. messaged this one. Let's see. >> Let me see. >> Have you messaged this one? She's the. attractive one on that. >> Oo. No, she's expensive. I think she's. like 600. >> How do you know? >> How much is that? How much? >> He does know the number. He knew the. number. [laughter].

>> That's her number. >> Yeah, she's expensive. You can get like a hand job for like 200. bucks to make a hot Russian woman. And. if they like you, they'll let you make. out with them. >> Wait, that's it? Just hand jobs? I. thought it was the. >> Well, like that, too. But like 200 bucks. hand job, you know, 300, but you're not. going to get like a hotter woman, per se. >> for sex. >> Yeah, >> you can't pay like a,000. >> A,000 is too much. I mean, unless you're. having like a like Russian orgy, then. okay, but like I'm I'm not dropping. that. >> Okay, he just added one today.

>> No way. >> Yeah, he just added one on Snap today. He's going to be paying for a later me. >> Oh my god. Give me my phone back. >> No. Give me my phone back. Who's this? Oh, hopefully not. No offense to. this. Yeah, she looks like it. [ __ ]. dude. He's paying for all these women. Oh, he just goes through them. >> There's a lot. >> Uh-oh. This person blocked you. >> Uh-oh. What did you.

Oh, and here's one. Here's one that he. was meeting up with. He sent all this. [ __ ] Sent the She sent the address. She. showed up and he her the thick one. >> Oh [ __ ] I remember her too. [laughter]. >> So you're really just like. >> That one's from Minnesota. That one's. from. >> Have sex with her? >> Oh, she's Latina. That's number one. But. she's Nicaraguan and she she's so short, >> [ __ ] This is crazy [ __ ] you got going.

in here. >> Look, are you just Are you memorizing. over there or what? >> Huh? >> You memorizing or what? >> No, I'm going through your [ __ ] No, we'll go through more in the post show. Uh because I just saw his Instagram and. oh it's crazy. Um oh full body central m. and such is FBSM I'm being told. Okay. So. I don't know man. This is kind of crazy. You're complaining about you're on. government assistance in every way. whatsoever. You spend 1,600 bucks a. month on that's. >> it's great. You should try it. I mean.

Togei does the same thing. It's like you. know you got to release that energy. You. know what I mean? You got a lot of. builtup anger. >> Okay. So, this is uh the weird thing is. like I wanted to know what you've been. up to this last year. You're not telling. me very well, but the thing is um you. were posting videos and things that were. weird and so we're going to I want to go. through them now. I haven't seen it. They've talked about it. I've heard the. rumors and whatnot. So, I need to see. what's going on. We'll play these on. screen with you all as well. >> Take a look. >> Go check out my latest post. Um I'm. getting into conspiracy Tik Tok. Um, my.

favorite conspiracy so far has been the. Lost Dutchman State Park one over in. Phoenix, Arizona. Apparently, there's. some Lost Gold over there. Uh, we'll. have to go find it. We'll do a little. trip together, a little field trip. Yo, how do I get used on this platform? I'm. trying to get sponsored by [laughter]. >> um, this is really hard. Uh, I don't. have a job. I don't have any income. coming in besides from food stamps and. unemployment. So, if someone could tell. me what I could do to so I don't have to.

pay my bills anymore and I could just. have. sponsor me, please just let me know. because I'm done trying. >> That's not funny. It's not cute. It's. pathetic and you should be ashamed even. at 24. What's. >> that's like a gambling platform. >> Oh my. You are just the wor You are the. worst creation. We need to put you down. in Minecraft. This is insane. We We need. to put you out of our misery in. Minecraft. This is. >> I'm monetized on social media. That's. the thing though. Yeah. And what pennies. are you getting? >> 3 cents. >> Exactly. >> Now come the [music] days of the king.

>> Shut the up. >> Hey, the three cents that you put in the. SP S&P 500. sp. >> shut the up. You know what you're. talking about. And you were on. unemployment, too. >> Maybe. >> I hate you. I hate our system. I'm done. Cut the whole thing. Let the states run. it. This is insane. Okay, >> man. Sorry. No, I'm not. >> It's like raising this guy's. [clears throat] right hand, if you know. what I mean. It's just like Yes, it is. People like you that push me, Caleb. >> It is people like you that pushes me to. want to slash everything and then I have. to just bring myself back to reality and.

there are good people that deserve. things, but. >> this is insane that we go through. Okay, what's the second one? >> Oh, great job. I'm going to invite you. Fox. >> I'm watching. >> Not proud of it man enough to admit I. blacked out of the bar and I have no. idea if I paid my $10 tab or not. >> Oh [ __ ]. >> I'm not proud of it man enough to admit. it. I've been on unemployment for 3. months. Uh not proud of it man enough to. admit it. I don't want to get a job. [laughter]. >> [ __ ]. >> That's not. >> That's. >> It's not funny. >> It's not funny for you, but for me it.

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show literally teaches you how to scam. the system. Guys, this is why I'm a. bumaxer. Why the do you want to go work. anywhere, make 50 grand a year, get. taxed up ass? >> No goals. >> Bumax. >> So what? For what? What's the life. you're trying to live? >> Move to Mexico. It's the shit's the. same, but I want a bun max while I'm. doing it. It's It's like being a. jabroni. You know what I mean? It's like. you you smoke a little Jay. You go, you. sing away. >> Yeah. But how do you afford the Jay? You. still have to like pay for it. >> We got to request it from the.

government. That's That's what we. >> You're not going to I don't think that's. >> You got to request. You got to be like, I didn't work. you know, no money. underneath the table, blah blah blah. It's it it's it's a seamless system. Okay, we're just on different ends ends. on the the wave. >> The third one. >> Yo, guess who just got ham mofos? I did. not go to sleep last night, but that. does not stop me from enjoying a white. cloud. Okay, fellas in Loser. I love. that. >> We need to be on top of the world. We. need to be on prennazone because we.

accidentally fell asleep by a tree that. one night and got severe acne in my. legs. But let's kill it. >> That was a night. >> Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Whoa. Hold. on. Okay, so you're an actual pathetic. loser, too. >> No. No. >> You're just like out there falling. asleep in a tree cuz you're like taking. [ __ ]. >> I was practicing because of your ass. When when I get my when I get when I get. my benefits canled from people like him, I got I got I might have to sleep by a. tree and I might have to knock on his. little Dory over here and I have to be.

like, "Yo, yo, yo, yo, what's up? >> This is Texas. You will be shot.". >> No, you wish. Yeah, the only guns that I. got that red shirt are right here. >> A, you are the worst. Let's watch the. final. >> I'm on Ashwagand. >> Last one. >> Prostitute for like $200 and she let me. her and make out with her. So, it was. kind of a win-win. Don't you want to. kiss a [laughter]. >> She's hot. Anyways, um I hope I don't. die of AIDS. Anyways, um waiting for my. Uber to pick me up. Uh it's like 4:00 in. the morning. Uh anyways, I want to thank. the government for paying for that.

prostitute cuz I'm so thank you Obama. >> They Yes, it's true. And he is fully. admitted. I didn't even see those. That's crazy. >> That's what bum acting is. Okay. Either. you you you enjoy it or what, you know? >> Yeah, but I'm being told you're also gay. maxing. What's the is gayaxing? >> I don't know. I was told you were. gayaxing. >> What the hell is that? I mean, I might. have an old. >> You have a lot of gay guys hitting on. you, so you're trying to gayax. >> Okay, you got. >> What does that turn out to?

>> So, I What it basically means is uh you. take advantage of the fact if someone's. gay and then you basically get like free. [ __ ] from them, but you got to like. >> you got to like, you know, >> you have no more. >> you got you you got to be careful. Okay. So why? No one's gonna not everyone's. like you. They're not just gonna you. >> No. That's the thing though. I'm scared. of gay guys. I'm I don't like them. >> What? >> They're aggressive, dude. I don't want. to be around them. But. >> well, but say no. Stand up for yourself.

Have some kind of uh agency to say no. >> Well, dude, that's the thing. You got to. be Dude, you actually got to be. >> You have to be clear. Say no. >> My Dude, my neighbor, dude, he's a. weirdo. So like I. >> Cuz he's gay. >> Yeah, 100%. But he I get cigarettes from. him. I like siggies. And I was like, "Yo, like can I get a sig?" He's like, "Sure." And I'm an open person. I go and. talk to anybody, right? I don't give a. But like the moment you talk to a gay. guy, they're just like, "Oh, you want to. me, don't you?" I'm like, "No.".

>> Okay, just say no. Cuz that's the thing. >> But then that's when I realized like, "Oh, I could just take advantage of. this." Like I could just be like, >> but that doesn't make the gay people bad. inherently. Yes. If they think you're. flirting, >> ask ask Jesus. I don't know. That's. that's kind of. >> well sure from a religious perspective, but I'm just saying out in society, no. one's going to most they're likely not. going to you if you say no. So just say. no. Make clear and they'll be respectful. typically. >> Okay. So. >> if they're not, they're a bad person and. don't hang out with them. >> Like this is like how much of a. psychopath I am. Like honestly, here's.

the thing. If I go in and I'll be like, "Hi, I'm a I'm a I'm a straight guy. Um. can I get a cigarette from you or can. you like bring me to the airport?". They're not going to want to do it after. like the fourth time, right? >> Sure. Of course. And that's fair. You're. using. >> But if you just like kind of keep. yourself like, you know, closeted. >> So, you're playing it. You were playing. it. Then you face the consequences. No. [ __ ] If you are you if you are. >> works doing a little crack thinking. they're going to get in the hole. They. obviously think at some point they might. get in the hole. >> Yeah, but that's. >> that's fair.

>> I don't [clears throat] want them to get. in a hole. That's fair. >> No [ __ ] I wouldn't want them to either, but I would be very clear and not take. advantage of them. And I don't think gay. guys are bad because of that. Yes. If. you lead someone on, they think they're. going to you or you them. I don't know. >> Well, that's the thing though. That's. like the first thing that goes in their. head. Like they're just like crazy. >> What do you think gay guys do? This is. all they do. They just. >> Yeah. >> But yet you're going to get AIDS before. all of them with your Maxine. >> Freak. >> Goddamn. You you you wish you could beat. me. I think you're just jealous. >> at maxing.

>> Yes. You're jealous. >> No, I don't want those STDs. >> You're jealous. the fact that I have. more fun than you. What do you do all. day? You like go sit around like reading. like like. >> reading is good. You don't like reading? Reading is good for the brain. >> Look, reading was a was a a rudimentary. skill I lost back in third grade. Unlike. you lost in third. >> I know how to talk to people. Okay. >> Do you you've been bad at this. conversation so far. You go down rabbit. holes like none other. Okay. So, I'm. also being told that in your you want to. move to San Diego again, right? I do. I. do. >> So, maybe that's where I'm trying to get.

you. I'm trying to make something. productive here. Maybe that's what I'm. trying to get you. Um, and you're. considering only fans maxing. Why does. everything have to be maxing in order to. do it? What? Oh, he has another beer. We're not going to put that on camera. for monetization reasons. Yeah, why not. just drink through it, buddy? Let's just. drink through it. >> No, no, no, no. Not right now. I want. you to answer the only fans maxing. question. >> Oh, yeah. Only What's up with. >> I'm being told you're considering that. to make your move to San Diego. >> Of course I am. Yeah. like after like.

all this like. >> but you're gonna have to do some things. and men will be your subscribers. >> That's fine. I don't give a. >> It sounded like you gave a there for a. bit. >> Well, like it's different if it's like. in person. I'm like, "All right, no. I'm. no way. No, no way, Jose." Right. No. way, Jose. You're not going to get in. the hole. Right. But and at the same. time, like if they're behind the screen, you got to know your audience, Caleb. Just like how you like scavenage. everybody in your little little app. Yeah. Your little app. You got to know. your audience, right? I know a lot of. guys. >> provide value. But if they consider it.

valuable, they stick around and most do. >> I know I know a lot of guys are going to. want to see this physique. And they're. going to want to see what else I got. underneath. Okay. So, >> I have to say this based on everyone. thinking I'm a gay man, which is okay. I'm not offended by. I will say I am not. a gay man. >> Did you just hear me say I'm not? I was. preferencing. >> You're preferencing. You got a. preference. Listen. But I look a gay. man. But I can also tell from a societal. standard. Yes, besides your personality. and you taking people without their.

consent, you are a societal level. attractive physique person. So, you will. get paid subscribers. >> Thank you. I I appreciate the confidence. boost here. It's not a show. >> I want I want to throw another idea at. you. So, like. >> here's what I'm But I'm being told. you're considering transmaxing. >> It's an idea. >> So, what is that? What is transmaxing? >> If I put on a wig and like I put on some. chi-chi or something. You know what. chi-chi are? I don't know. I'm assuming. tits cuz you did this guys. [laughter]. I'm sure I'm going to see you in the the.

O of subscription. You can like dress. like a girl and then like these guys are. just going to pay you, right? And you. got to know your audience, Caleb. And. you got to know your audience, right? Just like how you got your little app or. cookbook, whatever. I'm going to be. cooking with gas here. Like I'm not. afraid to make money any way I need to. Okay, that's the whole point of. >> So, what do you think your financial. score is? 0 to 10 today. >> 14. No. Okay. Okay. I don't Are you trying. to be silly? Stop. What do you think. your financial score is? 0 to 10 today. Come on. >> Um, probably two.

>> Yes. Thank you. And I'm sure it probably. went down from last time cuz it doesn't. sound like you're doing very well. >> It's amazing. What is. >> I thought this was financial a. financial score, take the assessment for. free at calehammer.com. Just takes a few. minutes to see where you stand. And. again, it's free. You see where you're. doing well, where you're doing poorly. Caleb.com. And if you don't want to be. like a guest who ends up on the show and. you want to know where your money is. going, make sure to download the. Dollarise budgeting app. It's a free. trial. See if it works for you like it. does for tens of thousands of monthly.

active users. And then like most of. them, take the annual version cuz it. saves almost 50% and you get the budget. friendly meal plan signed by me mailed. directly to you and the digital version. of the cookbook as well. That will all. go to you if you're an annual version. Dollar.com dollar.app link in the. description below. >> I was trying to type boobs in the. calculator. >> Comedian man. >> What do we got here? Okay. So, you. definitely sound like you're open to the. gayness, by the way, from everything you. said. >> So, I need [laughter] to know my. freaking gay.

>> Um, okay, great. If I can get you to do. a job, >> what would you actually enjoy doing? Cuz. are you sure you're even going to enjoy. sex work? >> I mean, >> cuz you might have to do things you. don't want to do. That's what is. >> Well, I mean, I don't know. I mean, like, I would only thing I wouldn't be. doing I'm not sticking anything up any. hole. Okay. >> They might want you to though. >> I don't I'm not doing that. Okay. Nothing like that. But I I'll dress some. I'll dress up like a furry, you know. Mo, I might, you know, drink a little. curry, like, you know, whatever. Not. that was such a wrong safest thing to.

say, but whatever. Okay. So, listen. again. You are making 3,000 now, but I. highly doubt you're going to be at this. job for long. You lose every job and I. mean, well, I mean, this episode exists, so good the luck. And then somehow. you'll actually be on unemployment. again. But this first thing I have um. Cash App stuff. I need to look at your. Cash App app. I'm being told. >> Oh jeez. Money app, Clover, Grants, Float Me, True Finance, Earning, Tilt, Dave, every Pay Advance app, me. Okay, I. need to start seeing them. Start pulling. them up. Start pulling it up.

>> Do you want me to like download them or. what? >> Well, if they're your apps with balances. and that's where things are. >> I'm not paying that [ __ ] back. What do you want me to do with you? >> If you use every single one, then you're. never going to be able to use anything. again. You're going to be You're already. banned from Venmo. >> So what? Who gives a. >> Well, how are you going to pay people at. some point? Uh, >> are you gonna accept money at some. point? How are you gonna do anything? >> I might have to scheme Max, you know, go. to the black web, get some. >> Okay, you must be obsessed with. Kvicular, right? >> I I do like him. He's a good guy. >> Okay. Is he a good guy? I don't know.

>> He's a great guy. What are you talking. about? >> I think he's entertaining as far as I. know. >> I think you could use a little bit of. Bone Smasher. I'm not going to lie. Just. >> probably. I think I have to get rid of. the fat first. But. >> why don't you take Ozmpic? Why aren't. you taking like Ozic or anything? >> I don't like shots. >> Really? >> Yeah. I'm a little nervous. >> You little But you take shots at me. What? That was That was That was it. That was it. Pull up. I need to see your. balances. You pathetic mor. >> Give me a second. God damn. Have some. >> Maybe on your credit karma. If I can get. you to go into credit karma, I can see.

>> What is that? Your sponsor. >> No, it's a place where I can see your. credit report. >> Oh god, I've never seen this before in. my life. >> Credit Karma. >> Credit Karma. All right, here we go. You. want to feast your eyes and fantasize? Take a look at this credit score. >> You do have a credit card. Oh my, he's. under 500. >> [laughter]. >> [ __ ]. >> that's not funny. This is actually. really bad. So, I don't know what to do. if you're not going to if you don't take. anything seriously. Like, why? Uh, I. wanted to see a follow-up or else you. honestly would not be allowed to be on. the show right now. Follow up. >> Exactly. That's why you're here. That's. what I'm saying. I wouldn't allow you to.

be on like this. >> The first time, let me get this little. whatever the hell this thing is. A. microphone. >> First, the first time I was here, I did. not get a true budget plan set up. This. guy might not basically attitude. This. guy claims to be the the the the bill of. the bull, right? I said that the first. time I was on the show and he didn't do. [ __ ] for me. Okay, I walked out of here. with a slap in my ass saying, "Get out. of here, kid.". >> That's not true. We assault. >> Where's HR, by the way?

>> Hey, I did not touch him. >> Where's that? Make clear. Okay, he's. he's being stupid. >> Yeah, he touched me and I was like. subscribed to El's Macho. Like, come on. >> Did I touch him? >> Thank you. >> Did not touch you, you freak. >> You wish. No, I don't want to touch you. >> God, what's that chain for? Maybe you're. into the BDSM. Jesus. >> Does it look good? >> It's all right. >> Well, thank you. [clears throat]. >> What's power pay? >> Oh god. That's That's for my ab surgery. That's from like when I like. >> ab surgery. >> Yeah. So, like they freeze my fat and. then like it made me get like whatever.

Like that was it. >> Okay. All right. I don't want to lean. into the gay allegations, >> but stand up maxing. >> Stand up and lift up your shirt. >> Oh [laughter] my god. Let's take a look. for the camera. Go. back. >> like this. >> You paid for that? >> Yeah. I mean, >> that just looks like a normal body. I'll. be honest. >> I mean, I'm drinking a lot of surveys. >> Put it down. You put it down. >> Do you want to see? >> No, you you got nipples. Everyone does. Put them down. Okay. I What did you do. there? That's a surgery. You took out a. multi,000 surgery for that. Yeah.

>> There's nothing there. >> You want to touch my bucks? >> You have paid $551. >> What? >> You have paid $550. >> $550? That's not bad. >> No, I'm I'm actually saying yay. You. have pain something. >> Oh yeah, that's good. That's good. That's [ __ ]. >> a 15.25% interest rate for abs you can't. even see. What was the actual surgery? Walk me through it cuz that looks like a. normal body. >> Okay. Okay. Whatever. So they basically. like grab like Mr. Ice Ice Te's freeze. gun from Batman and like they freeze. your fat like and you're sitting there.

with immense pain like ah. [screaming]. And it's it's done behind of like a. sketchy Walgreens but still. >> Are you fat? >> No. I mean I just. >> What was this? Cuz that just looks. normal. You don't look like nothing. >> I don't know. It's just one of those. things. I just I I I love infomercials, you know? So, I got scammed. >> And you can't say actually that we. didn't help you, buddy. Course career. certification. >> Course careers is a nomination to the. goddamn allegiance of the United States. Okay. >> What are you talking about? No. >> Course careers. Who the [ __ ] is going to.

hire you off a certificate? >> Certifications are great for resume. boosters. >> I certify as How about that? We know. that you are. >> no a lot of people we have lots of. testimonies from people in the audience. who have converted them into six figure. jobs and raises and advancements in. their career. Certifications are great. especially in technology. >> Can I get a can I get can I get a. certification to be like the host of. this show cuz I think you're not doing. it right. I think you're bad at this. >> Okay. >> What are you doing? >> Thank you for your feedback. >> Yeah. You little chapstick over there.

>> I get dry lips. So do you. Look at your. lips. >> Honestly people we want a real host. I. mean, this guy sits there screaming at. people like like I mean, I want a real. host. Okay. >> I barely even screamed at you today. >> God damn. Yeah. Yeah. Save save your. lungs for your your girlfriend when you. get home. You scream at her for god. forbid spending $4 extra on a potato. salad or whatever. >> We have money. We can spend it. That's. the point. >> Whatever. Okay, let me guess. You're. going to buy some of American food. What. do you guys even eat? By the way, you're. Native American. What do you guys eat?

>> Favorite food produce sushi. >> Sushi. >> and McDonald's. >> McDonald's. >> But we can't have McDonald's. So, sushi. >> Yeah, sushi is not bad. Wasabi. >> Okay, so you've actually been making. payments on this at a 15.25%age. >> Basically, that's impressive. >> Thank you. That's the first company he's. given me, by the way. >> Because you're actually making payments, which for you is a high point. But. you're actually making the payment now. It's cuz you're a little employed now. Not making much, but you are a little. employed. You won't be soon, but then.

your unemployment will be paying for it. Listen, it's only uh 66 bucks a month. You should be able to make the payments. here. >> It's It's a little difficult. I'm not. going to lie. >> What? Well, yes. When you spend $1,200 a. month on. >> Yeah, but that's like essential. Like, I. mean, like, it's like a life force. >> Why don't you jack off? >> I I I don't like run solo. You know what. I mean? I mean, >> I get it. Sex is more fun than jacking. off. Yes. Why don't you jack off instead. of paying for it and getting AIDS? >> I mean, are you trying to help me or. some [ __ ] What the hell is this you. specifically just said?

>> I don't know. I just I sometimes like. I'll take a lot of Adderall and I'll. like jerk myself off and like I'll lose. so much weight from doing that and it's. [ __ ]. >> what. >> I'm not going to lie. >> Walk me through it. I guess. >> this is not gay. >> This is goon maxing. Okay, so. >> Oh my. >> take take a bunch of take Okay, orange I. call them orange candy. Okay, orange. take a bunch of orange candy and then. when you take it. >> how much how many milligrams? I take a. 100.

I actually I'm getting my reup today. Is. that a lot? I've never taken I'm being. told that's a lot. Is that a startling. amount? Okay. I'm being told that's a. startling amount. >> Look, look, that's like doing the people. you hired. All them all your employees. seem to know about this [ __ ] I'm not. touching. >> I'm not judging. I'm just saying. Okay. >> I don't really care. >> So, basically, I mean, I take like 100. milligrams of Adderall. >> Oh [ __ ] 10 milligrams is like the. normal. >> No, that's like a lot. >> That's like max. And you take how much? >> 100. Ah. [screaming].

>> Oh, then what? >> I mean, I'll sit there and then I'll. just like, you know, look up some like. videos or some [ __ ] Maybe little two. girls one cup. Who knows? And then like. I will like sit there. I I won't finish, but I'll turn off the air conditioner so. it gets like 80° in my apartment. And. then I'm like goon maxing. So, I'm not. finishing. And I do it for like 5 hours. cuz you're just focused. And then I'll. lose like 10 lbs of sweat. >> Wait, this is like an actual workout. This is a weight loss thing. This is. This is I think you should try it. >> Wait, this is No, no, no. You're being. serious. You.

>> I'm being 100% serious. >> Hours jerking off. >> This is why I came up with the idea of. doing. >> raw even with a loop. How's it not just. raw? >> I mean, dude, it's like easy. I just I. mean, just don't go too hard, you know? Like. >> 100 milligrams of. >> How's your heart not like broken at that. point, >> dude? I got I got a heart of steel, baby. >> Uh, can we get our blood pressure. monitor for this man? I kind of want to. see it. Uh, let's check for that real. quick. Um, >> I'm actually getting my Adraw today. I. get it every day. every. >> and you go through it too soon. >> Oh, dude. I take like That's the thing. about it. I only take I I have a 30-day.

prescription, but I take all of it in 10. days. So, I have a 20-day break, so I'm. good. >> And what's your milligram prescription? >> Two 15 milligrams a day. So, 30. milligrams a day. >> That's already crazy, isn't it? >> Yeah. [laughter]. >> Yes, dude. But you But you triple it. >> Oh, yeah. I mean, I take a bunch. But. then you got the 20-day relaxation where. you like you come off it. Yeah. I think. that's the German side of me if you if. you know the history. >> right now. No, no, I'm taking it after. after this [ __ ].

you without it. >> So if you call me, I'm going to be. >> jerk the peanuts. >> Jerk the peanuts. Yeah, >> just for 3 hours, >> dude. It's insane. >> 5 hours with the And you lose weight. >> We can actually do it. We should do like. a video on it. I don't know. No, >> it's me is an. >> dude if you guys you guys know for a. fact if you take. >> if you take aderderall like it just. makes you want to like goon, right? And. so like that's what happens. >> Well, people people on meth like crazy,

right? So. >> no, that's not surprising, but I don't. like that it's a weight loss thing. And. I am concerned for your health. Like. actually listen, I hate you and our. society should probably not tolerate. you, but. >> nope. Don't move that arm, >> okay? >> But like I am concerned for your health. Let's check your blood pressure. >> My blood pressure. Let's check your. blood pressure. >> Hold still. What does it say, Rico? >> This is error. [laughter]. >> Okay. I think it has to be a little. down. And then you need to be loose. >> You need I need your arm to just be.

loose. Reek. >> Little Reek. >> Like here. >> Yeah, I think that's right. That's your. arm. >> And then I just need your arm to be. loose. >> Why do they call an aura ring if it. gives you no aura? [laughter]. >> Sorry. manhandle you a little bit. >> You're good. I'm already getting. manhandled by this guy. >> It wants him to see it selling him debt, which it shouldn't in his position. We. have great personal loans at. calebhammer.com for people. >> You guys got personal loans. >> for people that can use it. Not for you. Not for you. For people like me who are.

good with debt. [laughter]. >> Talk about a hypocrite. >> It's a It's not a hypocrite. I've always. been pro good debt. I'm pro credit. cards. I'm pro good debt. I'm pro. consolidation. I'm pro bank. I'm. >> also pro. [laughter]. Relax. >> Oh my god. That's funny. It's an error. CUZ YOU'RE MOVING. STOP, RICO. Oh my god. This is. >> What's the. >> You're going to meditate. Okay. [sighs and gasps] Just breathe in. Breathe out. I don't want you to. [laughter]. [snorts].

>> 128 over 86. >> Okay, you're you're fine. >> Look at that. >> That's probably the most healthy. >> Your body is healthy. Just I'm concerned. with you and the amount of medications. you're taking. And I will say this for. what it's worth. He is applying for. jobs. He's getting email notifications. about the jobs. Now, in the email. notifications that I went through while. he was taking his blood pressure, he was. getting denied for dogs. Uh jobs, including being a professional dog. handler. >> Um he is he's being denied. [laughter]. Every job, the most basic jobs you can.

imagine, he is being denied for. Okay. So, >> that's right. >> Let's see. I I need to collect your. other ones as well. um on here. from your credit. Ladies and gentlemen, I got something new to help you that we. have personally built right here on. caleb hammer.com. We have three new. Caleb Hammer financial resources. They. are the ones I would personally use, which is why we made them for you to. use. As you've already heard me talk. about, personal loans are okay when.

you're good at debt. I personally use. them when I can leverage them for a. situation. So, we have good personal. loans on caleb.com. We also have auto. insurance now you can check for free and. see if you can save a [ __ ] ton of money. on auto insurance and then to close it. off for now because we're building more. We have a debt relief program. You've. seen how hard it is for people to get. out of debt on this show. This makes it. so much easier, but only if you're. actually ready to change. Remember, none. of this actually matters if you continue. the same bad behavior. So, it's not for.

you if you still suck. But if you've. proved you can budget, check out these. three programs from personal loans to. debt relief to car insurance to see if. you can save a [ __ ] ton of money across. the board. Go to calem.com or the Caleb. Hammer financial resources part of the. pin comment or description below. Starbucks is [ __ ] and a waste of. money and you already know that by. making your coffee at home and investing. the rest. So now you need to do that. with your energy drink as well. MAKE.

GAMER SUBS AT HOME FOR JUST 40 cents a. serving. And honestly, it literally. tastes better. And we proved this. accidentally via a blind taste test in. our Hammer Elite show, Fat and Fatter. >> The number one ranked energy drink is. Gamer. >> Literally, the cherry flavor is insane. >> Listen, you can also get free samples to. see if you like it or 10% off your order. at gamersubs.gg. or click that link in the description. below. Type in code Caleb. So when was. the last time you. >> two weeks ago?

>> She's How much did that cost? >> $200. $200. >> and you her. >> Yeah. So she let me her. So basically. >> if I'm if someone offers me $200 the I. know they have AIDS. >> I mean. >> like there's no way that person's. >> you like buy your girlfriend like a. $10,000 Chanel bag. >> for Christmas. It was like her dream. She's always wanted the bag and I was. like I got money. >> You say I'm You say I'm a scallwig. I. pay for these girls too. You pay for. your girlfriend. I mean like it goes. both directions. >> My girlfriend. I was giving her a gift. But the thing is you're paying for sex. Um um but. >> but you went raw.

>> that's not good. >> I I did not know that. >> I mean at some point you didn't know you. were raw. >> Well because like I was supposed to just. get like a hand job and then like she. was like I really like you. And so I. started making out with her and then. she's like put it in me. And so I'm like. okay I'll do you a favor. Okay. Like do. a favor. >> Yeah. Happy birthday. Right. And then I. didn't realize at the time like I didn't. have a condom on. And I was like. >> how do you not know that buddy? >> I'm in the moment. Okay. I'm in the. moment. Okay. So, I have Loan Express. What's. this? >> Oh, jeez. That was like a payday loan.

>> That's a local bank. >> It was only 2% interest, but you just. took it out. >> YEAH. >> 22 DAYS AGO. WHAT DID YOU TAKE OUT $398. for? Not a huge interest, but it's. >> money. I forgot. I actually think I. might have No, >> you you what? >> No. >> Say it again. You think you may have. what? >> Uh, you took out a personal loan to Oh. my. >> dude, it's it's good. It's good for your. health. It's like spiritual. >> Yeah, sex is good. Maybe you shouldn't. pay for it. >> You need it, bro. You. >> Yeah, sex is good. >> It is. >> I'm not antisex.

>> You are antisex. >> I'm a gooner. Not for 5 hours. >> I am a I'm a great gooner. This is why. I'm start. $80 a month. You borrowed this to go up. >> Maybe. >> you are pathetic, >> dude. They sent me You're pathetic. because you know they got me. >> You got You got personal loans like Oh. my god. Talk about rage bait. >> What are you talking about? I'm going to. I'm good at I got you. I got you, hammer. It's time to It's time to drop. the MC. Okay, because I got you right.

where I want you. Okay, have you ever. heard the heard the term the nail hits. the coffin? Well, guess what? You. offering personal loans on your website, but you're a finance based. >> always been pro that. >> What the is that? >> What are you talking about? I've always. been prot. like Okay, this is like how much of a. stupid idiot you are. Like, I want to. hurt you. Like, I'm being 100% serious. It's like. >> I want to slap you and get your ass back. to the Cherokee Land. Godamn. >> Okay. >> I don't really take offense to anything,

but I'll tell you what I'm doing right. now. I'm ordering myself a lunch wrap. right after filming cuz I can afford it. You can't cuz you're poor and you don't. budget your money. >> Maybe if you go Maybe if you go on uh. download Favor. That's like the HTB. delivery app. You get a two for one. >> Favor is you. >> just like how I did last year. >> Dude, you're getting denied from every. job that you're applying for. Your. current employers even know you're. applying for jobs. You're pathetic. You. suck. Shut the [ __ ] up. >> You. $398. on That's what you borrowed for a cuz. you're a freak. That is crazy.

>> Whatever. [snorts]. >> Sick. Good response. Affirm. [laughter]. >> I actually paid for the iPhone using. reason that. >> So this iPhone. >> I stopped paying it by the way. >> Really? Why? >> Well, because like I don't have any. money. >> What Mark is that? >> That's the problem. I don't have any. money in this guy. >> You make money. Oh, so you must have. just stopped paying because the most. recent month is good. >> Yeah, >> but that was not the most recent month. that's reported on here. So it's. >> No, it's not. >> It's in collections. I got.

>> No, current as of April. That's. impossible. It's not in collections. >> No, they they. >> You probably have a different thing in. collections or it's internal collections. maybe because you haven't paid for it. yet. >> Well, I'm just going to declare. bankruptcy. Honestly, that's like my. real plan. I'm not going to lie. If I. declare. >> bankruptcy is bad though for you because. you haven't changed your bank. Credit's. already no to me cuz you haven't I don't. care about your credit because you. haven't changed your behavior that got. you here in the first place. So you're. going to be back here again. That's like. you should not use the personal loans. cuz you would then end up with double. the debt. It is for people bankruptcy is. totally good valid there for a reason if.

you change your behavior. >> What makes you qualified to talk about. this? >> I've done it myself. >> You have done it yourself. >> Yes. I started this cuz I did this very. same path myself. >> I believe you like you just like. >> very good. I need your approval. >> Blue. You're like I want to be the. millennial Dave Ramsey. >> No blue. I decided to upload. Yes. That. is how YouTube channels start. >> Like, you know what? You know what's. funny, too? It's like you got your your. personal loans. Why you do that, >> buddy? I've already explained it. Shut. up. >> Oh my god. >> You just fall back on the same thing. >> You need to start making the payment on. this immediately or it'll go to real. collections. And this is why you can.

actually avoid bankruptcy cuz you don't. need it yet, buddy. We're not even up to. $3,000. We're not even up to $4,000 of. debt. You owe $898 on here. >> $986. >> Who gives a dude? This is [ __ ] I can. just stop paying because I don't have. any money. >> But it's the minimum you payment so far, buddy. And you do. You are applying for. jobs and you'll start your OAF. But your. minimum payment so far are $210. You can. do that. You. >> subscribe. >> Can I? Yeah. >> I can, but I won't.

>> You can, but you won't. It sounds like a. maybe to me. Isn't that right? >> I'm not doing it. >> He's You too. Oh my god. Let's call him. I call him Jack in the Box. That's why. >> Brandon. Yeah. You'll talk to him in the. post. >> Is his name Brandon? You can't even get. your employees names right. >> What? Brendan. Okay. There's a lot of. collections, but is it even worth going. through? I don't know. >> I don't know. Yeah. Including like cars. of course. >> Oh god. >> I still owe my parents, by the way. >> Oh, I'm sure you do. But we have an. Amazon Chase card. Now, this is an. actual balance that will be difficult.

for you. Now, you made a minimum. payment. You made it. Now, it's maxed. out. That's why you can't spend. So, you. didn't. But the moment you do, you will. >> Wait, what was the question? >> No question. What's going on with this. card, though? Oh, the the Oh, they call. it the credit card or whatever. I mean, I stopped paying that [ __ ] So, like I. was. >> Why? No, you just made the minimum. payment. Don't stop paying for it. It'll. go to collections. I don't want you to. stop paying it. Don't. You can catch up. so easy. Just make the $40 payment. You're good. Please do not not pay. >> Yo, can we get like I feel like we need. like uh I was thinking about this.

yesterday. I was like thinking like we. need to get like a cut scene of like. it's hammer time and then we get like. the entire like Caleb Hammer cast and. like you guys were dressed up in like. credit card all the way up there to the. max. >> Well, basically I mean I just needed to. pay for I mean honestly I'm not going to. lie. >> It can't all be for you have to spend. money on other things. >> I know you go out to eat. >> I know your worst your worst thing. I. mean I forgot what I spent it on Amazon. looks max and [ __ ] I mean, I look. better than I did last time, right? Last.

>> being told you don't like the in Austin, so I know you spend money on. >> actually made a joke about that. I did. stand up. >> You want to hear a stand up routine? >> Yes. >> Okay, let's do it. Okay, so uh my. parents found off. They were so upset at. me. They were like, "How can you do this. to us, Rico? You're our little. sunshine." And my brother looks at me. He's like, "You're a disdain to this. family." And I looked back at him. I was. like, "Aren't you gay?". So yeah, that that's my little standup. routine. >> Okay. >> And then Yeah.

>> This isn't Gel Tony, but I I don't think. you. >> I would be Dude, I'm trying to get on. Kill Tony. You know, Little Mozzarella. >> No, >> I was I signed up for Kil Tony like a. month ago, and I I always hang out more. times. >> Little mozzarella. Little M. >> You're saying things I don't know these. things. >> I I thought you were like a millennial. I'm sorry. >> A year. But yeah, >> I like to hear your hands clap. Isn't. that your song? >> Very good. So, you want to get on that. and I wouldn't tell that joke. >> No. >> As someone who watches the show here and. there, >> I wouldn't do that joke. >> See, this is.

>> I'm not a comedian, so I can't judge it. >> This is what's the problem with the. left. They don't like you to make fun of. other people, right? And this is the. problem is that they stop they stop us. from speaking our minds. Isn't that. right? >> Thank you. >> Not on the left and not on the right, buddy. >> What do you want? Like the middle? >> Yes, sir. >> Yeah. Okay. No, I mean I take leftwing and rightwing. positions, whatever the facts are. >> What's like your most leftwing view? >> Most leftwing view, obviously. I don't. care about trans or gay people. I don't. care about that [ __ ]. >> That's not even a view. That's like a.

[ __ ]. >> It is. Many rightwing people don't like. it. Um I'm I like the. anti-discrimination laws. I think those. are important. Let's see. >> Yeah, I think your employees like that. >> Actually, yism is pretty left-wing, so. I'm good with that. >> What's like your What's your favorite. conspiracy? I want to hear conspiracies. >> That's the thing is I'm not into. conspiracies. >> You're not into conspiracy? This isn't. an interview of me. Thank you. >> I want to hear a conspiracy. What's your. favorite conspiracy? >> Public transportation. Big into public. transport stuff like that. But then I'm. right-wing on it, I guess, because I. want to enforce laws and fairs in order. to make antisocial behavior not on it.

Okay. So, what got you to disagreement? >> How much you spend on. >> um I probably spend like 300 bucks a. month. >> Well, what the I got a guy. >> I got a guy. >> So, what is it? Tell I've never bought. So, what happens? Where do you meet this. guy? >> It's like actually not too far from. here. So, I meet him at a sketchy little. apartment. He drives like a shitty. Harley-Davidson. You know, I get there. I'll be like, "Yo, I need like, you. know, give me like 60 bucks worth." He's. like, "Sure." And I get in his place and. like it smells like absolute [ __ ] Like.

the most. dingy place I've been in my life. But. then he'll like scoop it up, put in the. bag, and then like I'll test it out and. like I'll [snorts] just. >> You don't test it first? >> No, I test it out. >> No, no, no. test it for. that's the good [ __ ]. >> Laring has helped me focus my autism and. my Asperger syndrome. >> You're going to end up dead, [clears throat] man. I'm concerned for. you. >> A little Actually, I watched a video. yesterday before I came here. Apparently, the army like has fed uh. lollipops. So, they used to give like.

World War II soldiers like. >> Stop. I don't care. >> No, >> no, no. Of course not. I'm talking about. you. So, you spend How much is $300 a. >> probably like three grams? I don't know. >> Uhhuh. Is that Is that a lot? Is that. three grams a lot? >> Uh, okay. How frequently do you go. through that? >> We do. >> We confirms you did not do drugs before. coming on the show. It's very important. to us. >> Probably at least do like three. I could. probably do like a gram. >> Well, it's like shitty. So, I got to do. that all then. Honestly, I could do all. that. Like, >> get a better dealer.

>> Do you have one? >> No. >> No. >> I don't do drugs. I'm scared. >> You're scared to do drugs? >> Yes. >> Well, let's go to Coachella. I'll show. you. >> Not you. I would never be near you. No, I do not need those allegations, >> dude. I feel like you could like use a. triple. >> more allegations. No, >> I don't think so. >> You could use you could use a little bit. of mushrooms right now. I'm not going to. lie. >> Okay, I'm sure. I mean, that's the. thing. If I did, I would I'd be amazing. at my job. It would be incredible. I. would be so [ __ ] in and I would love. it. And that's the bad thing. >> That's the bad thing. >> I doubt it. I doubt it. I think you're.

hiding something from us. >> Sex or sex. Whoa. I was going to say. coffee. Call someone caffeine and sex. are my things. Caffeine and sex. >> Okay. Um, Delta Sky Miles gold card. What's going on with this? >> Oh god. >> Again, you are current. >> No, these these mofos like Oh god. They. were going to assume. So when I did the. first show here, unfortunately I got a. call from this lady. She's like, I'm.

with the American Express team and blah. blah blah blah blah. Like we will fool. you if you do not pay us. And I'm like, I don't got any money. And so I had to. pay $500 a month. >> to catch up. Yeah, that makes sense. >> That's insane. >> [ __ ] Yeah. Your fee was a return. payment fee. Do you know why? You know. what that means? >> I didn't have any money. >> Exactly. You didn't have any money in. your checking account, so it bounced. essentially. >> Like I thought you did end up making a. payment in the end, but you did have. that fee. >> You should get like a cross on the side. of your head, like a little like I don't.

know. You should be in the conversation. You can pay off this debt. I will try. to, but like I don't. >> I hope so. You're not that far from it, >> dude. But this is so boring, though. It's like I I just want to borrow. >> Finances are boring. It is true. Bumaxing isn't That sounds boring to me, though. Cuz I want to. >> What's to make your little Native. American spinach over rice? >> You don't even claim the native part of. me. >> You don't? Why not? You could get. benefits from that. And that's a bummer. >> because we didn't approve tribe because. my grandpa who was like 100% native was. a drunk alcoholic bum. We left when my.

mom was like two. >> A lot a lot of them are. >> So, we don't know. Well, yes. A lot of. natives are very alcoholic bum like. yourself. >> You I'm not native. I'm Mexican. >> That wasn't the point. I was. >> So, he's saying Mexicans are just. terrible alcoholics. Do you hear that? >> Okay. Well, you have a Blue Cash. Everyday card as well. What's going on. with this? >> Um, basically, so like that card, too. I. mean, that was like I don't even know. I. basically started paying that off. It's. like $21 a month. >> 21 bucks. See, you know, so there are. some things you don't listen. Stop.

Stop. I don't know if you're trying to. be silly or what. to stop. You can pay. this off. You have the your debt is. stacking up now. What are we looking at? Like 7,000 bucks. That is payable. You. bankruptcy is not necessary for $7,000. Okay, >> buddy. THERE IS A CHANCE here for a. better life. We can get you down to San. Diego. Not La Hoya, but down to San. Diego. >> Actually, can you come to San Diego with. me? >> With you? No. >> Please, please, please come. Let's go to. San Diego. I want to go to Pacific. Beach, bro. I loved it over there. >> That's great. Go. I'm not going with.

you, >> dude. I'm like telling you like your. little New York City thing. Everyone. knew that was. >> charging. Charging. >> What are you gonna What's your plan, Caleb? Let's talk about you now. Okay, enough about me. Talk. >> actually. Just enough about you. Even. more interest being accured. You're. making your payments. It's at a low 6%. interest rate. And I'm glad you're not. purchasing now. I know there's a. purchasing account here. >> Now, one medical. What's happening with. one medical? $400. Oh, from a friend. No, a friend punched you. Wait, what? Oh, and then you crashed. Oh, you.

crashed out and fell on this fell asleep. in the wood once and got poisoned. What. the No, this he's a piece of [ __ ] So, like he got mad at me like me and him. were doing like and like I'm not sure. what I said to him, but like he started. punching me in the face. So, like I got. a little mark in my tooth here. Thank. god Rico knows how to fight. So, like I. end up pinning him down and actually. holding him. I actually know jiu-jitsu. by the way if you guys didn't know that. I actually know jiu-jitsu. So, I end up. pinging him. I was like, "What the [ __ ].

you doing, Holmes? Like, get out of. here." So, he started doing that and he. kept trying to punch me in the face. So, like I just ended up leaving, right? And. then I went to the woods like to. recollect myself or whatever. And then. like I got a bunch of poison ivy. [laughter] on me and that was the funny. part cuz like that did more damage than. the tooth thing over here. >> So, what happened? You had to go to the. hospital? >> No, I didn't go. No, [ __ ]. >> Well, why do you No, no, you owe to one. medical. No, but my my mom my mom was. like, "Ami, you should go to the.

hospital. Look, look at your leg." And I. was like, [laughter]. >> so like I I end up having to like, you. know, find a doctor, but like this. country is [ __ ] So like the only. way I could think of finding a doctor. without having to spend $2,000 on an. ambulance ride. >> is to go. >> No, I mean, >> oh, >> you had poison ivy. You weren't shot. >> I I I I felt like I was shot, Caleb, emotionally. No, it doesn't look good. The. >> emotionally I was up, Caleb. Okay, get. the. >> So, what did you do?

>> I I want I got prescribed prennazone and. apparently that shit's a stimulant if. you guys didn't know. So, [laughter]. that guy steroid, right? >> Wired. Yeah, it's a steroid, but it gets. you like wired. So, like I felt like I. was on aderall and then if you remember. what I did on Adderall. >> So, what happened? >> Um, anyways, no, that was it. I just got. like prescribed or whatever. And then, you know, I I end up stopped talking to. him. I was like, "Yeah, I don't want to. talk to that guy.". >> Now, speaking of you being shot and. speaking of your gay neighbor, why did. your neighbor pull a gun on you? >> Oh god. No. So, like he thought I was.

like talking to this girl and like to. quote Chud the Builder. Like, no. offense, but like they were kind of. chimping out on me a little bit. So, I'm. not going to lie, like this guy, I was. like talking to this girl at like 2:00. a.m. I was like, "Hey, can I hit your. vape?" She's like, "Sure.". >> Pause. You know him. You love him. >> Tyler. [cheering]. Back again. >> Back again. >> How are we doing this, Tom? >> All right. So, go ahead, start the story.

from the top. So, uh, this guy was kind. of chipping out on me. I'm not going to. lie. [laughter] So, basically, I was. talking to this dude and like you get. it, right? So, this guy a little more. caramel skinned to be honest with you, but I was talking to this girl and like. I was like, "Can you vape at my. apartment?" And she's like, "Sure." And. I'm like being sweet like she's Latina. like I it's my type, right? But then. she's like warning me about her. boyfriend and I'm like, "Why is she keep. telling me about her boyfriend?" I asked. her, "Does he beat you?" And she's like, "Yeah." And I'm like, "Okay." Out of. nowhere, this guy is like, "Who you.

talking to?". And I'm like, "What the. >> make monkey noises?". You know, >> that was it. It's closer to Native. American sound. [laughter]. Um, but basically, I mean, I was like, "What the?" So, like I'm I'm calm, cool, and collected, right? Unlike this guy. Anyways, so I'm talking to him and he's. like, "Did you get my girl Tumblr?" And. I was like, "No." He's like, "Give me. your phone." And I was like, "Okay." And. so I'm showing him my phone. I'm sitting. there. I can't her vape. And she's like,

"Whoa, whoa." And like the girl keeps. screaming at me and him, her boyfriend. And I looked at her and this is what got. me [ __ ] up. I was like, "Can you. please be quiet?" I was like 1950s. husband. Like, "Can you please be. quiet?" And I just like, "Oh, hell no.". And so he like pulls a gun like you. better get out of here, bro. And so he. pulls a gun at me. And so I start. running away. I hop a fence and I was. like, I'm already drunk. I was drunk. And I was like, oh [ __ ] So I'm like, this is not a joke. So I'm running. I. hopped a fence like a good Mexican. And.

I look back and this guy like, YOU. BETTER RUN out of here. I'm not sure I. can say the N word, but you better run. out of [ __ ] And so like I'm like, Jesus Christ. Anyway, >> I'm I'm quoting if I can say it. Let me. say it. >> I'm quoting I'm quoting here. Okay. >> Well, Andrew said he was chimping out. >> you a little bit. Yeah. Honestly, >> like buddy, you're saying you're that. and the n-word not looking good. >> Look, I he called me it. I didn't call. him it. But I mean, I'm just saying. But. I jumped over the fence and then I. looked back over. He's just like, "YOU. BETTER RUN OUT OF HERE." AND SO like I.

start running again. I'm like, "Jesus. Christ." And so I call the Austin PD. Oh. my god. Jesus Christ. They took like. they all respect Austin PD, but Jesus. Christ. It's like, let's get the, you. know, let's get some some some. situationship here, okay? And so as soon. as I leave and I he cops pick me up. Like they're like, "Okay, like we're. going to try to find him." They escort. me back to my apartment. They find this. guy an hour later at like 4:00 a.m. And. this dude's in handcuffs. He has like.

this death look on him with a hood. It's. like And I'm like, "Bro, what?" I'm. like, "That's him. That's him. >> He's going to kill him when he gets out, >> bro." They even sent me a letter. They're like, "Hey, like fill out this. information. will let you know when he's. back out. So like I mean. >> Oh, Rico's [ __ ]. >> Dude, >> we we we skipping past the party, asked. for permission, and then said [ __ ]. anyway. >> Yeah, that was bad. >> What the is we talking about? What. >> was you could say that? I mean, I don't. know what the. >> You can say that. >> You could say I mean, >> what the. >> As long as THE [ __ ] WHAT IS UP WITH. THESE [ __ ] GETTING COMFORTABLE SAYING.

IT AROUND? What is happening? We on a. streak. What is going on? >> That's Gen Z. I mean, is it? >> It is. is I mean your guys' generation. the millennials here. >> one year. >> Damn. >> I'm a Zennial. >> You a wannabe. But anyways, you could. say as long as you're not like calling. somebody like Is that true, Tyler? >> No, we don't. >> Okay. I wanted I mean you can say it. come from your home. You know what I'm. saying? You can say that all you want. If we are. >> I will be honest. I had a racist thought. the other day. >> Just a racist thought, not action.

>> What's the thought? >> Rented uh a nice hotel for my. grandparents, my brother, my parents. They all had their own rooms. It was. great. It was wonderful. We wanted to go. back to the hotel one uh to the pool one. day and um [clears throat]. [laughter]. >> we couldn't really use it because they. uh there was a group of black people. Um and [laughter] they hit them were. they were two they separated a little. and they each had their own boom box,

let's say. Oo, [laughter]. >> and playing different kinds of music. And um we tried to get in the pool and. both groups were shouting at each other. in very fun ways and friendly ways but. very loudly. >> Yeah. >> Uh and we couldn't hear each other and. their kids were splashing us and it was. um it was the first time I felt racist. in a bit. >> What was [clears throat] uh what was the. thought? What did you what did you. think? >> I was thinking I didn't like these. people.

because they were annoying the pool. Like what the we just wanted to enjoy. Like I rarely get to see my family. We. wanted to enjoy it. And they were. literally like did they own the place? Like why did they PLACE BUT THEY WERE. ACTUALLY LIKE THEY own the place? Like. no one else was able to exist there. >> They were taking up 5% of the place. >> I wouldn't recommend caramel crew caral. carbonal cruise lines to honest. [laughter]. >> If you know, you know. >> They were taking up 27% of the space but. making up 80% of the noise. >> Dude, that's hilarious. That's.

>> whatever the number is. I don't remember. it cuz I'm not racist. >> Is it crazy? You're probably You're. probably like the only other like black. guy here. I haven't seen anybody else. Right. So, >> we got three. >> No, there's three of us. >> You have three? >> Yeah. I'm not the only one anymore. >> Decent ratio. The gays are dropping like. flies, but. >> Yeah. >> Yeah, man. >> Okay. So, you owe your parents two. dollars. >> Unfortunately, I do. >> Why is that? >> Because the car or whatever, but I'm not. paying them back. I'm not back. The. Mazda. The Mazda 2. The I call it the. Batmobile. >> Do you have it? >> I do. >> Do you run over black people with it? >> No.

I don't. >> making sure he's not racist. This is. good. I got you. I'm on your side. They're just saying chipping out, bro. Exactly. They were, bro. Honestly, I. mean, it's like they they kind of do. sometimes. I'm not going to lie. >> Who is they kind of do? Who is they? >> Who they do, bro? >> Who is they, >> dude? Like, I mean, >> who the [ __ ] is they? Explain. Who is. they? >> The black people. They go out sometimes. They just act too much. You know what I. mean? Where it's like, bro, like kind of. like, you know what I mean? >> I ain't going to lie, there are some. ghetto ass. >> Yes. Ghetto people suck. Yeah. Yeah. White trash people suck. >> Yeah. Yeah, that's true. And the I don't.

know. Well, I I want to use another word. than ghetto, but I'll call them ghetto. Mexican types. >> Oh, yeah. Like I I did a video ranking. Mexicans, by the way. You should check. it out. >> Okay, Rico. No one gives a I hate anyone. that is trashy. >> Yeah, >> regardless of their I can agree with. that. >> Yeah, >> anyone that is trashy. That's fair. But. I would not I don't It's just, you know, saying the ad word in front of a black. guy. Well, >> that's a little crazy. >> At least it was soft. At least it wasn't. hard R like confidence. [laughter]. You have a debt collector for $91 for a.

Miami Airbnb. $91. Just pay it. >> Yeah. [ __ ]. >> Just pay $91. Rico, don't your. >> Don't get a hand job one day. $40 you. owe to a bar. >> A bar. >> Burn it. >> Woke up drunk at a bar on the grass and. you owe them 80 40 bucks. >> I like doing that way too much. I like I. just like go homeless maxing when I get. blacked out drunk. It's kind of fun. Max. called being a loser, dude. >> Dude, this is this is this is like. >> Are you real?

>> This is real. This is This is real, my. You know what I mean? >> Okay. I don't like that. I don't like that. Not allowing that [ __ ] Do not say that. to Tyler. I don't like that. So, we are. ending this and we're going to go into. the post show cuz I'm not going to allow. that kind of [ __ ]. >> What the Hey, give me some love. I have. to film with an extra 20 minutes for. him. But I don't know if I should go. through the audience. He won't like it. if I I just I don't think I do not like.

you. Don't say that to the black. Don't. say that to my friend. >> Let's keep going. I won't say it. I. won't say it. I just comment. >> chicken account. You ended with I mean. you started with $118. This is pathetic. It's all raising canes. [ __ ]. [ __ ] Bull going inside. Get into. some [ __ ] Farmers market [ __ ]. Genie member Terry Peter's burgers. Perry's burgers. Chipotle patrol patrol. ended his savings with $411. Go [ __ ]. yourself. You're not budgeting. And. honestly, I hope when um you might want. to wear this around Caleb just so you. blend. [laughter]. Oh [ __ ] I'm so funny. Okay. Okay. What.

are you going to say? I hope when the. black man gets out of prison, he shoots. your ass. Go to the, you know, post. show. Join Hammerly. Three shows a day. Premium shows every single day. Six days. a week. I'm going to go through his fun. phone. I saw some concerning [ __ ] in his. Instagram DMs and I'm about to go. through that. I can't wait. It's going. to be incredible. Apologize to this man. right now. >> I'm sorry for not using the hard. >> Okay, you are a piece of [ __ ] I'll see. you in the post show. What a piece of. [ __ ] Why are you screenshotting so many. conversations with people? Are they the. people that have accused you? >> Maybe I care out and doesn't know what's.

going on. >> This is just the message he's sending to. everyone. Sex question mark. Sex. question mark. >> Is this bro? >> Not really. >> His entire exude is Andrew Tate and. Cvicular and. >> Oh jeez. Unemployed scammer. Being called aist is a compliment. This. [ __ ] I just launched the brand new. Hammer Elite app available on every. major platform. So you can watch every. show anywhere you want. You'll get three. exclusive dedicated shows [music] every. single day Monday through Saturday.

Refer a friend after you sign up and you. get an additional 30 days of Hammer. Elite access for free. [music] Download. the Hammer Elite app by using the link. in the description or pin comment down. below. This is the best membership. you'll ever join.