Toilet Water Waddle | Ep 183 | Bad Friends

[Applause]. yeah then we go to Cleveland Ohio then. we're in Pittsburgh Pennsylvania two. shows first show is sold out the second. one still needs some people out there in. Pittsburgh let's go September 16th. Massachusetts and we play Boston what. you know we are in Boston dude we're at. the green monster in Boston we're at. Fenway that's what shocks play then we. go to DC our founding fathers would love. us there love it then where do we go. Denver Colorado your hometown yeah no.

I'm not from there I'm from Chicago. then we're in Milwaukee Wisconsin and. then we're in my hometown Chicago. Illinois where the creature lives that's. right in Chicago Theater she's gonna. come smack you and then Minneapolis. Minnesota are you coming yes she is I'm. gonna give her a hug and we finish it. off in Madison Wisconsin Minneapolis and. Madison Wisconsin so go to. badfriendspod.com for those tickets. where at bathrooms.com. badfriendspod.com. badfriendspod.com you two are. who are these two.

years you two are disgusting well you. two or something we're bad friends Never. Gonna Get It Never Gonna Get It. Never Gonna Get It Never Gonna Get it. never gonna get it now we're gonna get. it never gonna get it never gonna get it. that's Trump on the internet yeah yeah. like if you're gonna do a mug shot which.

what what mug shot would you do um. mine would be like this it's gonna be in. my life let me see your mug shot. wait. oh. yeah that's this is my mug shot yeah. ready yeah. have you ever you've never been arrested. yes I have you have a mug shot I don't. have a mug shot I don't know what. dictates getting it on the internet. where did you get arrested it was I was. in college I got arrested really.

how does college not count what do you. mean it doesn't count I'm an adult I'm. over 18. yeah but you're practicing to. be an adult I somewhat agree with this. statement that's true actually yeah you. haven't you know worked out the Kings by. the time you're 21 22 then it's when do. you work out the Kinks are your kinks. worked out yeah at 45. you think all of. your kinks got worked out by 45 do I. have a mug shot do you no. you're saying people that have a mug. shot didn't work out the Kinks yes oh so. you think we got your Kingston. I'm kinked out yeah I know you're.

already kicked out dude but when I was. 19 no candy. you're riddled with the Kings kinked up. yeah you're kinked up yeah I got. arrested when I was in college. twice once for uh I was looking for. myself sorry I was uh you have a mug. shot yeah from a couple years ago well. look keep finding it let's go I want to. find yours I got arrested for um. fighting in public and then I got I got. uh urinating in public. pissing outside of a bar and they made. me go to like sex sex ed classes whoa.

why well because they could register you. as a sex offender if your genitals are. out in public are you being real yeah I. mean obviously I mean I mean I should. have had 52 000 [ __ ] months trust me. yeah yeah we've been battling them away. from every city we go to yeah it's. actually hard for us to deal with I mean. no but I got urinating in public and I. had to go to one of those um oh you know. what I had to go to dude uh a class that. DUI guys have to go to oh I love those. ones and the stories were horrific yeah. like I they were they would do they'd.

literally be like I'm sure this is that. meeting sometimes you experience this. whereas guys are like yeah I was uh I. would get blacked out drunk first thing. in the morning while I fed my kids. breakfast and then drove them to school. in the morning yeah and I would hit. stuff on the way home and then I'm like. I was pissing outside of an Irish Pub. yeah and it's like why am I here I know. a guy named he shared that he was a. school bus driver oh what and he was. blacked out drunk blacked out drunk yeah. I think it was like elementary school. kids weren't they all when we were kids. right but he he drove off a canyon and.

what they all died except for him yeah. so he lived yeah. oh he's a people. what happened was I drove off. I'm kidding I made that up okay good. yeah yeah but also I don't know why I. saw you laugh I saw you back pedal it. because I go they drove off a cliff and. he lived and you're like he lived. no but there was wait what do you mean.

there's that girl look this up that girl. that just got sentenced to two. consecutive 15 life sentences two uh two. oh the girl that goes I don't need to go. to college no oh is that the same girl. remember she's like I gotta go to I. don't know what I gotta go to class. A family right no this is Mackenzie. shirella yeah drove 100 miles an hour. into a brick wall killing her boy it was. her boyfriend and his best friend she. lived a hundred miles an hour even. though a brick wall let me guess huh she. was fat that's right. no no be real dude look at how skinny.

and small no she's a tiny little girl. that's her whoa. two life sentences she got into a fight. with her boyfriend and this [ __ ]. lunatic drives her car into a brick wall. with his best friend in it 17 she was. drunk yeah hasn't worked out her Kinks. she's full of Kinks she's so full of. Kings dude right and one of her Kings. was alcoholism killing her boyfriend oh. yeah yeah whoa so I guess the rumor was. they got into a fight yeah and uh she's. like I'll take this into my own hands. but how do Jesus Jesus Take the Wheel.

yeah but how do they prove that. uh because this is if he's dead it's. actually interesting you say this yeah. well there's proof that they were in a. fight via the text message that they. brought up still it's like and then yeah. they can prove her motive because. these cars all now every car now they've. got these computers right onboard. computers I can tell when you break how. far you break how fast you were going. yeah. you know break uh if she was drunk was. she drunk no I don't think she was drunk. if she wasn't drunk then that's no I.

don't think I don't know why drunk came. into my mind then well you would assume. she had a brick wall going 100 so she. wasn't wrong no I don't think so [ __ ]. she didn't break it. but they didn't she didn't break and she. sped up the car registered she hit the. [ __ ] gas and then they hit the wall. now when you re would did she go to Coma. or did she realize she was still alive. no I think she's she was fine right away. yeah but then I would take charge and oh. and kill yourself. I mean you really because her intention. was to kill herself as well right sit.

down. what's on your forehead Rudy Rudy just. walked in and she's got a ball it's one. of those no this is a pimple sticker. Carlos uses these two oh yes there's a. new thing so Carlos is a teenage girl by. the way yeah but he used one too he has. it's a it's a it's a sticker to put on a. pimple for how long all day all day and. all night you can do all night all day. why does it work why don't you do the. star why does it look like a mole it's a. pool. it's a piece of poo yeah oh you got the.

Poo design yeah. blend it in with your face. yeah wait this is so interesting this is. the hip way to cover up blemishes so. you're not as embarrassed yeah no they. were because I use this you don't use. the stickers I've never used this oh. they're the best no those stickers work. yeah I don't get pimpales anymore well. then there you go I mean I had my fun it. already got me here but you have one I. mean where is it what's this no that's. it that's I've had it since I've known. you it's a birthmark I thought it was a.

forever pimple. a simple yeah you think I got family. yeah by the way I do have a pimple right. below my right butt cheek it's been. there for so long yeah put a sticker on. there no why I'll do it I Let It Rock. okay he's got his own personality okay. that's conclusive. what's his name. oh yeah I want to be congoose he's. Spanish I'll let you imagine anyway he's. a good guy Rudy Jules is back in the. house yeah what's in the tote bag what. did you bring for us nothing straight.

from school no from work. work and school someone's growing up and. now she came to her other job let's see. what's inside open it up this is my. emergency bag what's in the emergency. bag. okay what could be in there tampons yeah. good okay yeah face spray yeah for what. do you mean just like Rosemary yeah. rosemary Rosemary's nice mints yeah you. need those. um Allegra allergies yeah yeah allergies.

yeah. Tylenol. okay that's enough no hey let's finish. this up perfume circus clown. another allergies a streamer a rabbit. um the two things I love the floss yeah. these are the best floss picks yeah yeah. wait there's more oh my God pepper spray. I don't have Peppers why well that's.

good that should be all those Cosmetics. still look good and nothing to sort off. criminals I have a taser though okay. guys can we see it not here I forgot it. oh that's always convenient yeah and. then I have a gun but I never have it on. me what spray. we have that at the house okay that's it. that's it yeah very good. I don't have a bag do you have a bag I. never care you so you actually used to. carry fanny packs and bags I don't carry. anything at all yeah but that's all this. stuff this is my wallet this is all I. have yeah that's it I have nothing like.

this yeah you never you can't get. anything from me you're never gonna. Smash and grab me there's nothing on me. you do I'm gonna say something to you. you have a talent you have a gift with. my friend what is it she's the best. cleaner person. you finally cleaned up all the cap you. can poop you're better than Mexicans and. I I don't say that no. all of them all of them wow wow that's. pretty big they're amazing I would put. my lady up against her any day of the. week I bet you're better at like jumping. fences than Mexicans too or going on to.

them it depends on how creative you are. yeah I think you're Mexican. you're Ultra Mexican I I want to be. Mexican good she's so good and you can. be anything you want to be you know what. she does can I tell you what she does. that's special okay. so you know for me. [Laughter]. my toothpaste the tip of it always looks. like. you know um. a volcano erupting yeah yeah I mean it's. just like coagulated and [ __ ] you.

know I mean junked out where like the. [ __ ] it won't even come out right. right the pace yeah it's clogged she. unclogs it wow and you clean around it. huh she cleans around it like it's a. brand new little tip let me just guess. go ahead let me guess. you're one of those guys who doesn't. push from the bottom you squeeze from. the middle yeah definitely 100 yeah oh. why it's so funny why is it funny it's. just there's two kinds of people. somebody squeezed in the middle and some. push from the bottom yeah when I jerk.

off I squeeze from the middle and I push. from the bottom I hold my nuts and. that's why women go blind. oh because that's why your wife has. infections in her eye well first of all. if you go from the bottom infection one. of her eyes we always fix one and you. get the other one I understand right but. when you do when you drink out from the. middle right it drops down less can. happen right less trouble yeah less. trouble dude it's a smaller wave. it's a big smaller wave yeah yeah that's. all it is yeah you squeeze from let's. see what else is like this when you put.

toilet paper when you run out of toilet. paper you don't put it back on the on. the rack you just put it on a counter on. the side or something I don't put it he. doesn't do it I don't have toilet paper. right I do this. but it's always oh [ __ ]. and I do this. yeah my pants down right since cheeks. you mean going to the cupboard yeah to. get and I won't even bring the whole. thing over.

I'll just take it from the cupboard and. you'll wipe there no you go all the way. back to the bathroom and then if I it. wasn't enough I do the Trek Back. I love it what do you mean it's so good. what do you mean peanut butter dude is. the best I enjoy it TJ Miller has a. great peanut butter. TJ Miller makes peanut butter.

you don't know that no he has the best. team in about in the business what is it. called he has variety is dead that's TJ. TJ Miller the stand-up comedian has. chocolate cherry peanut butter bro I. won't eat any peanut butter unless it's. TJ Miller brand my friend are we reading. an ad for this no I'm not reading an ad. I don't even want to even talk about it. because I want it up to be a peanut. butter it's the best peanut butter in. the market why would it be because he. puts stuff in there that you wouldn't. think that okay there should be toffee.

give me a example like Cherry dried. cherries in peanut butter yeah but I. just want peanut butter well then you go. and get Jiffy okay who do you think I am. or what do you get Jiffy Jiffy Jiffy. what's it called Jiffy Jiff Jiff Jiff. choosy moms choose Jeff yeah yeah. by the way what a white phrase choosy. moms choose yeah it's a Karen saying. that that is a camera yeah yeah yeah. what other slogans are Karen slogans.

um. by Menin. that's the only one I know uh uh slogans. Burger King yeah have it your way yeah. that's Karen that's a karenine what's. Target slogan. what is the slogan for Target. is a general expect more pay less expect. more and pay less that's a little bit of. a currency yes yeah. what else wow what's Walmart what's. Walmart I feel like I don't know any of.

these catchphrases me either save money. live better do you know why because back. in the 70s right rice. a San Francisco treat right they used to. have music Yeah by men right it's a song. right these laser Jingles dude jingle. these pieces of shits no Jingles they. just write it down well this is the. problem this is why the jingle Union. that's why you just come up with a. jingle do you guys know McDonald's so. let's let's give Walmart a [ __ ].

jingle that's right he's right. McDonald's yeah. love. [Laughter]. [Music]. let's all okay. what the [ __ ] what the [ __ ] are you. talking about yeah that's in the. Philippines. that means I'm loving it I love this no.

no no no no the phrases I'm loving it. I'm I'm loving it wait love what's that. the toes. that I love the feet that's what she. said I love the feet.

no the phrase is I'm loving it you're. saying it's I love this. maybe they don't have the [ __ ] word. then you don't then you make up your own. song. same company dude doesn't matter they. don't have the same menu yeah they serve. back over there they have bad burgers. they have a bat Burger a double double a. double uh what is it called a big big. bat the Big Mac big bat yeah big bat get.

yourself a big bat look at the. McDonald's in the Philippines menu by. the way it is different than here yeah. what is it she knows we've you've told. me before it's all different okay let's. do it in what's on it look at the size. of those fries look at them they have a. [ __ ] like a single drumstick a. drumstick with bone in it but it might. not be chicken. is it bone yeah is there a bone in there. it can there can be bone or there can be. no bones one piece I ordered that and I. bite into it I go there's no. is that what you're saying they [ __ ].

[ __ ] me with the bone it's a surprise. wow and then what and then sometimes. there's a bone yeah what animal is it. um. it's not a chicken it's not a chicken. that's a huge bone yeah bats yeah it's. fat bone that's a bat bones go up a. little bit let's see what else is what. else do they have there a lot of fish a. lot of fish a lot of fish and fries fish. and soup fish and soup right down below. there's a soup one. spicy McChicken mcdough and Fries what.

kind of fish is it let's be real what is. going on yeah what kind of fish is it. you've never have you ever had a fish a. sandwich from McDonald's no from uh. labcato. no interesting but you know McDonald's. are it's like it's expensive there right. is it yeah what do you mean by that it's. like what's the price of a of a burger. like the same price as like a house or. something no like for us there it's. expensive like you only go there right. like so we went to the Philippines so if. it's if you're fancy you go to. McDonald's that's a rich person's.

restaurant Kinda Yeah wow we went to. McDonald's when we were there yeah we. did and also chicken. first I went to the Philippines I was. with their family right yeah and we're. like driving down we park and I go yo. I'm gonna go to the Starbucks and. they're like no no no no we can't go in. there oh they're not allowed and I go. why it's the Four Seasons they acted. like it was like a Four Seasons no no we. can't afford oh Bob they were like I'll. pay for everybody yeah you're like I'll. buy a Starbucks but they acted as if it. was like for privilege only right yeah.

how much how much would a cup of coffee. be there at Starbucks I don't know. um what's the what's the money again. what's the money but. what what is the money vessel fat what. it's special you have pesos what like. just like these guys well except you're. on the Euro now huh scum. couldn't couldn't hold out could you. [ __ ] when we went over there yeah it. was like fancy fancy yeah but now when. you go there now you eat it you drink it. how many pesos is a cup of is like a. latte a latte Maybe.

500 pesos and how much is 500 pesos to a. dollar. eight dollars wow that's much more. expensive than America yeah yeah what's. a latte here I don't actually what the. [ __ ] five bucks five six bucks yeah so. it's not that much more yeah I guess I. said that but still that's a lot of. money they won't even go in the building. yeah I get it yeah yeah. but I forced them you made them all go. and guess what everybody talk about cake. pop Starbucks yeah.

oh out out no homeless right yeah and I. was like all right guys I'll get it for. you and they waited outside no they're. talking to you as well it's probably so. you were homeless. that's a funny thing if people in. America with money always look homeless. they have spaghetti there too how is the. spaghetti it's just like Italy it's got. to be so good it's so good yeah yeah by. the way spaghetti spaghetti is from the. Philippines it is yeah oh that's right. it is yeah.

have I tried Philippine spaghetti. where Jollibee Jolly I've never done. Jollibee we've talked about it on the. show I'm never going to order it yeah. because look when you you end up looking. like that guy yeah yeah that guy's a. white guy yeah. he was a handsome white guy he ate a. [ __ ] Jolly be [ __ ] spaghetti and. look what happened yes John does now. yeah every it turns out everyone that's. eating Filipino foods yeah that guy the. Filipino used to be white people tell me. this isn't related to someone that you. know come on this guy look at this guy.

me yeah look at this guy he's Korean. yeah he's pretty Korean he's 100 Korean. yeah yeah oh my God a Korean I I heard. some Korean this morning at the doctor's. office yeah because what do you call Mom. Mom yeah yeah and the woman said that to. the and so I was in the doctor's office. and the this one Korean woman no less. than 112. she I swear to God I mean I. cannot believe you could see her heart. out of her shirt. really she was so [ __ ] older yeah and.

frail and she's sitting down and her. daughter might have been 85. wow and her. daughter was like she like shuffled to. the front yeah and she's like too much. paper. and the woman's like okay you have to. fill out all the paperwork she's like. too much with the daughter did yeah and. she handed it back to the woman at the. front yeah as if to say [ __ ] you I won't. do it it was amazing I was like why. can't we all be this way too much paper. and she literally gave it back to her. yeah then goes back and she goes okay. then uh miss you know whatever Mrs Lee. you have to take her down to the third.

floor she has to go get an MRI we talked. about this and she goes Oma. and then she's doing some of your Korean. Jazz you know this [ __ ] guy uh. have some respect the guy okay okay so. she. she so she was Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. into her mom we stuck with the chitty. chitty chitty chitty bang bang and she.

goes and out of all the stuff she was. like you know Korean Korean Korean and. then goes MRI. and the mom goes no no. no and then she wheeled her out and I. thought I bet you they went home I bet. you she was like [ __ ] the paperwork [ __ ]. the MRI I'm gonna go home Morgan and. Morgan if I'm driving down the street I. get a car accident guess what I'm gonna.

do you're gonna call Morgan and Morgan. I'm gonna call him why because they're. they're the most reliable helpful and. they're America's largest injury Law. Firm they got you covered baby they have. over 100 offices Nationwide with more. than 800 lawyers but not only that with. over 15 billion dollars recovered for. over 300 000 clients Morgan and Morgan. has a proven track record of fighting to. get you full and fair compensation. Andrew Morgan Morgan are our homies if. you're ever injured you can check out. Morgan and Morgan that is the way to go. you may be confused you just got into an. accident you're on your way to work and.

you're like what do I do now it's easy. right it's so easy what do they do all. you have to do is call Morgan and Morgan. and submitting an injury claim is easier. than me looking deep into Bobby's eyes. and saying this look at me I love you. it's easier than love you say it back. if you're ever injured you guys a lot of. people get in car accidents and if. you're ever injured you can check out. Morgan and Morgan their fee is free. unless they win you heard that their fee. is free unless they win for more. information go to forthepeople.com bad.

friends or dial pound law pound529 from. your cell phone that's for the people. for the people.com bad friends or pound. law pound 529 from yourself this is a. paid advertisement fire is over 300 000. bookable travel experiences in over 190. countries they offer everything from. simple tours to Extreme Adventures and. all the niche interesting stuff in. between Viator is the place to go to. book memorable travel experiences and. let's talk about it Bobby booked me a. memorable travel experience through. Viator for my little birthday vacation. which I want to say thank you and the.

fans should know that means a lot to me. look you don't have to book an expensive. extravagant thing if you're trying to. hook up your friend or you can do it for. yourself you can just do something small. they have everything from something like. a nice cool hike that you can take or. hot air balloons you can do so many. crazy cool things via tour is a website. an app where you can book travel. experiences and do almost everything. you've ever dreamed of they offer. everything from simple tours to Extreme. Adventures so many bookable experiences. and I can't wait to take my little trip. and tell you guys about it when I get. back I can't wait that means so much to.

me I really appreciate it dude and when. you book a travel Experience Andrew just. be mindful about this with Viator. there's always flexibility that's right. support with free cancellation Andrew. look at me yeah payment options and 24 7. service well I hope you don't cancel. because I really want to do it you too. can do this if you're looking to travel. and get a great experience while you're. out there download the Vitor app now use. the code Vitor 10 for 10 off your first. booking one app over 300 000 experiences. you'll remember do more with Viator. have you thought about what you'd be.

like at a hundred. dead I'll be [ __ ] dead there's no way. I'm lasting past a hundred I mean 90. I'm like I can see Eastwood went to 90. you have an Eastwood Vibe do you think. it's why because we both hate you. Koreans yeah. you guys hate the Asia yeah yeah but um. I mean what are you gonna be like at. that age yeah but I see I won't be a. member of society anymore we've talked. about this I'm going to live in complete. isolation yeah I'm not gonna be I won't. be living in a major metropolitan area.

yeah what happens if you get sick Andrew. then I die by the lake yeah I go down to. the water and I Fall In Like A Man leave. the Jimmy Carter and his wife are still. alive still right now no they're not. they he died no Jimmy Carter he's still. they're in hospice both. both of them are dying together he's 98. years old they're dying together though. see this is no way to live but is that. romantic no if you die that's your wife. okay here here's Jimmy Carter here's. here's wonderful look at that no.

disrespect to the Carter family here's. Jimmy Carter yeah yeah he did yeah. [ __ ] right no no all their hearings. they're hearing. and then the nurse Mr Carter you [ __ ]. all over the bed again we have to lift. you up and clean up all the poop yeah. really that's what it is every day but. you're falling apart in front of someone. you love. no thanks you think she's crawling over. there. foreign.

I just don't want to be that old where. look the love oh my God look at the wife. the commitment what does she look like. this is like that's her now I know but. what does she look like before probably.

stunning yeah what's her name Judy. Carter what's her name. it's not weird we don't know her name. yeah what's her name. Rosalind Roslyn yeah look zoom in a. young Roslyn Carter yeah. yeah still old why does he look old that. was the 1940s well give me the one that. they got married you can see their yeah. look at that beautiful let's Zoom that. in. oh yeah that's the Roslyn right that's. the reason how handsome he was dude a. little bit I gotta tell you what I mean. like a sniper Yeah well yeah those teeth. are sniping something Chomper Whoppers.

yeah yeah she was pretty though she was. pretty yeah yeah but look my point is. dying next to someone you love like this. little titties huh no no. he looks like Celia Murphy yeah with a. you think he looks like Cillian Murphy. oh cause she's got a big crush on him oh. yeah look at him he's one of your faves. isn't he so we've moved on past uh no. I'm still in love with Harry Styles oh.

my god did you want to go to Taylor. Swift's concert while they were here you. did but why didn't you go it's too. expensive look at this you have old. money bags over here. Scrooge McDuck he wouldn't give you. wouldn't give it her money for the. tickets if she said Tito Bobby I really. want to go see Taylor Swift you wouldn't. give it to her I could have when's your. birthday November she's gone man yeah. the shows are gone yeah. unless you want to go see him see her. somewhere else no I'm fine oh a big fan. I see she leaves no I don't need to see.

her yeah but you know I know of somebody. that went to the show in Washington. Nikki Glaser went to like four or five. yeah and but this this person. is it an average person doesn't have. Nikki Glazier funds right right so she. afforded it yeah so she had to take this. girl that I know had to take a bus you. park and there's a bus filled with. screaming eight-year-old girls yeah. jam-packed in a box yeah you and then. you can't even go into the [ __ ] thing. for a couple hours that's like Carlos's.

dream yeah. dude I'm not into eight-year-old girls. that's insane oh nine it's nine anyway I. don't know so then she then she waited. four hours after that because she had to. wait for the boss to pick everyone up. but the line was so long it was cold. that it was shaking and I'm like is it. worth it I mean. I think it is hi it's me oh I'm the. problem yeah it'll be worth it it'd be.

worth it I think it's worth it you know. what it is when you're young do you. remember going to a concert when you. were Depeche Mode and it was [ __ ]. amazing yeah yeah that's what I mean it. was worth it when you're young it's so. it's worth every second that's why when. you get older and you go somewhere. you're like I'm gonna do this as. conveniently as possible. you're like I'm gonna make it easy for. me to do this what is this behind using. footage no speaking of concerts Carlos. Santana had an anti-trans rant. yeah I can't wait. God Made You and Me. before we came out of the womb.

sounds good. when do you know anything right. because the woman is a woman and a. menace of men. by the way how funny dude how funny is. this ready he's like I don't like trans. people and it's just like the ocean. under the moon. yeah yeah.

wow oh my God oh my God what is he doing. what is it why did well I'll tell you. I'll tell you wait what but yes sir I'll. tell you why why does he care to talk. about it in the middle of a concert what. a weird thing to bring up in the middle. of a show. transgender people should stay in the. closet he says oh oh. wow that's accepting yeah that's nice. and warm but look at his audience. probably. old Latinos yeah I mean there's I mean. there's not who it is there's not like a.

22 year old girl there with blue hair. yeah man I don't know if that's true. Carlos Santana transcended a lot of. generations I would argue have you been. to it Carlos Santina. what I didn't say me but I said he does. transcend Generations I bet you don't. know anybody that went oh dude I went to. the Carlos Santana show. let me thank you no no nobody I know but. he did but he has been no one I've never. met so who does go I don't know that's. why people who is Carlos Santana no she.

doesn't know that she doesn't see that's. what I'm saying yeah but he is a. phenomenal guitarist I mean imagine her. at the concert going what the [ __ ] is he. good enough of a guitarist to be. publicly against trans people and we. still support him no no it's insane it's. insane Carlos Santana wow I I imagine. it's old white guys. is it old white guys like these guys is. this kind of like the Jimmy Buffett. click yeah you know what I mean like is. it Margaritaville type of cats did you. look up Carlos Santana's audience yeah. fan base fan base we'll go to their fan. page they gotta have it so here's the.

deal. Carlos. is struggling with something of his own. what do you mean why else would he bring. it up so adamant. he's going through something isn't. interesting nobody would bring that up. out of nowhere if they themselves. weren't going through something like. he's literally on stage vocalizing no a. man is a man you born a man yeah I mean. seriously it's like when it's like when. someone's like [ __ ] hate the gays and. then they go to like a gay like the one. a politicians like gay people don't.

deserve to be married yeah and they. catch them at a [ __ ] gay night club. what's he going through huh from Team. Santana Carlos Santana Salvador Santana. and Jose Santana release new song. there's Rhonda she met uh Carlos and we. met Carlos Santana Cruz out of Galveston. Texas he sat with my family for a while. just hung out my husband is disabled and. can't walk well that's why he hung out. so Carla's such a beautiful soul my. husband is now in ICU in Gainesville. that's so sad meaning Santana was a. highlight of his life that's very nice I.

mean no that's very sweet yeah unless. the whole time he met with his husband. he was just like what's up with these. trans people died. [Music]. yeah there was nowhere oh Carlos Santana. Oh look I see a brand new PS5 my son. played it before he had covered he. passed away three weeks ago see this is. what's [ __ ] up. this guy's selling fake PS5 saying his. son had coveted and died this this scam. that you ran on Twitter. still running are you.

making yeah I. think back you know how many people have. literally hit us up and been like why. did Bobby run a PS5 scam on Twitter. well how do you get a Twitter account. back we got to call Elon yeah and you. know what he wrote right there after he. said the trans rant Nobody's Perfect. nobody's perfect that's such a good. that's such a good laugh anyway you. don't even know who that is no I don't. yes what kind of music do you think it. is. um rock.

yeah yeah it's rock yeah it's rocking. yeah yeah Latin Rock. it's rock the songs are probably the. most popular popular songs I think the. popular song has no vocals to it right. [Music]. keep going oh I know that yeah. they play that at the Disco. [Music].

do it again wait. wait. try to do that like the bass baby. because I'm more of a bass guy I need. more of a bass guy anymore I'm all about. that bass yeah he doesn't play the bass. I'm doing the guitar. give us the [ __ ] song give us a yeah.

and honestly yeah that was much better. than the first time yeah how did you. even pick up on that I don't I don't. know fancy is just really good so when. you're at the Disco which I don't know. what disco you would go yeah what disco. you're going to yeah the Philippines. okay angry what's it called what's it. called I don't know disco you go to a.

place and you don't know what it's. called yeah because because it changes. names every week no and every town. there's like a festival every week not. every week. every month okay and then there's like. uh in like the basketball court. they by the way yeah how low is that. hoop. [Laughter]. feet yeah you guys just know what you. can get it up there yeah so at the.

basket at the basketball court you guys. do disco yeah. wow look at them so it that's you when. you're a little kid uh-huh and who. dances there all ages all ages that's. inappropriate they should have some. separation. do I you know can I just say something. like this kid is part look at that guy's. like on coke in the background but this. white guy's on coke stumbled into this. party. but when I do my talent show there. though yeah you've been to how many two. two yeah yeah the whole place fills up.

mm-hmm oh yeah it's they got nothing to. do. also I bet you there was AC in there no. it was outside oh really it's literally. outside yeah they have fans no it's I'm. sweating you're dripping I might get a. dry song because you sweat when it's. cold in here I know I'm sweating now I. know yeah yeah it's sweaty it's a sweaty. does anybody have air conditioning out. there only the rich people Super Rich. have you ever been in a house in the. Philippines with air conditioning yeah. her mom's house so your mom is super. rich and so you can't get McDonald's or.

Starbucks. like when she grew up as a kid right. yeah she had there was no running water. the showers were like with a bucket yeah. right I still like a bucket shower yeah. I do them sometimes in my back you would. have to heat up the [ __ ] water we. don't even heat it heat it up shower 95. all year round out there right just. leave it outside you do that yeah. there's like leaks. like our house was so small that we had. to just sleep in one bedroom and there's.

like Mouse cockroaches everything and. then the bathroom was so what's so funny. it's Carlos difference between the. Cockroaches and the mouse. I mean I can't believe there's both of. them I just I'm feeling for Rudy right. these are a war let me ask you something. there's no one I want to know about the. cockroaches in the mouth there is. there's no is there like it's been a. long stance. hey. what are you doing here. do me yeah so.

okay what what you want to team up. you want to team up. let's attack this little brown girl yeah. yeah let's go. let's go. and there's like I don't know the. English word but it's train train oh. there's a choo-choo train no wait what. it's like.

an insect it's an insect let's pull the. old train train. oh who's that. we have these in the United States so.

what does a train train do there choo. choo they just like. autistic kids love these yeah yeah what. does a train train do nothing but they. burn you if you they touch your skin. right does a train train burn you does. it burn you does a train train insect. burn I've tried it you tried to like. there's like red marks on your skin but. then don't do it yeah millipede see it's. a millipede there's a toxin that's in. Millipedes oh I see we have these.

millipede toxins can cause blisters and. burns wash your skin right away if you. don't think a millipede has emitted any. liquid onto your skin wolf this can help. prevent a possible allergic reaction you. might develop do people use millipede. toxins for good. because I'd be curious to know whoa dude. what do you work for Putin. I mean none of your business. why don't you see what happens yeah wow. millipede toxin is it better can you eat. it food. see you eating millipedes as food so let.

me ask you something you have the train. trains cockroaches and mouse mice mice. right what else. um spiders of course yeah lizards. um I like lizards yeah salamanders yeah. you have salamanders yeah yeah monitor. lizard the one that I ate oh yeah the. monitor I do like monitor yeah yeah cool. looking does anybody have to keep any of. these as pets. spiders we like play with it. interesting interesting yeah so you just.

will get a spider you get a spider you. put it on a Matchbox. so like have like a house you put a. spider inside of a matchbox yeah as. their house and then you play fights. with other people who have spiders and. like they battle in like a stick what do. you mean you throw away like this yeah. they're like cockfight oh my God. this is insane did you guys bet yeah I. bet so so you put your spider on a stick. on a stick on the on your side yeah. another side and high five how do you. know that they'll fight what if they.

just go to each other well sometimes. they don't fight you know why they fight. because you've trapped them in a [ __ ]. box forever and they're they don't know. why yeah you put them in a match box but. we feed them feed them what do you feel. what do you feed them. train trains no look at this look at. this there it is oh my God we have UFC. yeah. it's like saying so this is a cool this. is the thing that that's a lot of kids.

do yeah. yeah and yeah and if he tries to web. away they just grab his web and yeah put. it back they put it back oh wow okay. until something dies. or so there's death or someone else or. someone gets hungry what's that what's. that that's a matchbox that's where you. put it. that's a that's a that's a Macbook. that's a oh so you you you better be. yeah you can't even bring it in school. what you can bring it in school so that. you can play with the other students.

wake up man how have I not gone to the. Philippines. I know right look at that that's amazing. insane I want to go I want to see this I. want to see the war though that looks. like a [ __ ] spider that'll bite yeah. yeah so no is there kids that die from. spider bites not that I heard of Oz yeah. because they don't tell anybody they. want to keep this game going. you want delicious I want delicious you. want great meals you got to get Factor. dude with the busy fall season already. in swing you might be looking for.

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and he's just kind of just right. Spiderman Spiderman Philippines do not. have a lot of spiders the ones they do. have are mainly harmless even so the. Philippines is home to a few dangerous. species such as the red back and the. Black Widow but is there a deadly. insector that you guys are afraid of. like no do you have Lyme disease there. or no like ticks they've got to have. ticks there's ticks but there's no such. thing as lime disease that's a white. people thing that's us is it real Lyme. disease yeah it's real for whites but.

you know what are you playing about. anything oh yeah yeah my back I don't. think it's the line disease I think it's. a real thing yeah Dengue fever have you. had that I've had that what is it I. won't think if you for so bad so it's. mosquitoes bite you and then you what do. you use [ __ ] and vomit for like days and. days and days yeah but you lose so much. weight you look great afterwards should. we get some dead guy in here I want. Dengue Fever it's so bad why is Bill. Gates working on another covet let's get. a Dengue going over here yeah yeah how. about this rabies how common is rabies. over there are you getting bit by dogs.

malaria is a classic yeah that's old. school yeah and hepatitis has been there. done that yeah. but I do think rabies is wild in the. Philippines Department of Health uh. epidemiology Bureau uh uh 55 human. rabies cases and deaths what. so far this year yeah that's so many. people 55 people are dying from rabies I. don't know dude there's a lot of people. there dude how many Americans how many. people die from rabies in the United. States yeah. public health problem it's a big deal.

how about in America why are you. laughing Carlos dude Carlos this isn't. funny dude did you go you didn't go with. us to the Philippines right Andreas that. was fun right. I feel like Carlos would die in the. Philippines. there's got to be glory holes there. can you get Dengue from a Gloria I feel. like I do well over there in what way I. feel like people just like me in other. countries I just smile and kind of just. smoke a cigarette or something I know. but you notice it no okay what you know.

about oh God I mean what there's like. some sexual sexual [ __ ] that he's gonna. get involved in oh yeah like it's not. even it's not far from like Bangkok all. that stuff no they have it there oh they. do yeah yeah what they have like. ladyboys and stuff yeah but that's in. Thailand mostly right no they haven't. there's a lot of ladyboys there's so. many lady boys there were you friends. with any ladyboys growing up yeah I had. a lot anybody in your family was a. [ __ ]. no Carlos Santana would have hated that. huh dude what if your cousins had a.

Bobby Lee shirt on. oh hot dog shirt oh yeah Paul yeah Paul. dude I was I go to this village where. his cousin lives and I swear to God he. has a my face on it when I played bass. on right going oh oh hot dog but he's. out there like doing grout work with it. yeah you're his work shirt yeah but it. was insane I was like what how I don't. know I've always had that yeah well you. know they'd be flying stuff for them. yeah anything at the Goodwill we. dropping boxes I was flattered actually. well he didn't buy it oh what those are.

that's that that you know we give them. just boxes of [ __ ] yeah what you know. what it is you know like no he went to a. special like thrift store no you know. when they make two different they make. shirts for in a championship for sports. they make one for each team in case the. other one wins yeah and then and the. other ones go to the Philippines that's. mixed in with a box of Mad TV stuff oh. okay a couple of Mixology posters yeah. all the old all the old bangers that we. used to do yeah how many how many rabies. deaths are there a year in the United. States I gotta know I was just pulling. up though oh yeah like loser shirts.

overseas look at this yeah okay okay you. know what though yeah those to me are. more valuable than the winner yeah. anybody can get their hands on a [ __ ]. winning shirt but it's harder to they. they send them to Africa and stuff. rabies death in humans in U.S. 80s 89 there were more here oh no no. that's over the course of 1960 to 2018. those are due to exposure to bats right. yeah only 89 through the last 40 dude. yeah I can't believe I haven't talked. about this yeah there is a [ __ ].

raccoon that's got some [ __ ] balls. this right I'm I'm in my house uh-huh. dude he's sitting on my fence the other. night yeah I go outside huh. staring at me yeah go go but why get out. of here come here come here you can have. them you want me to bring them to your. house but here's the thing because he. goes through the trash he knocks it over. and they spill yeah I don't want my. trash on the ground I know but if you. say come here come here you could be. friends.

No New Friends as Drake said No New. Friends what I'm saying to you dude you. think I want a [ __ ] as a friend that's. what I'm saying you think I want some. [ __ ] in my house yeah it is my friend it. has that Vibe dude first of all my dog. is full black the raccoon is a [ __ ]. mix the raccoon is Barack Obama I know. but the raccoon is Barack Obama which I. like yeah but my dog because you don't. you don't Know full black okay I can't. say a joke right there you can't I don't.

want to oh my God. I'm literally setting you up for a joke. and for fans at home we're getting. censored by by uh fancy yeah yeah we're. trying to give you a good black joke. there I gave it to him right there all. right so you I'll give you the joke I'll. give you the joke okay are you telling. me that that your dog is full black yes. and the raccoon is half black half black. half white half black half white yeah. that's what you're telling I like the. full black one much more whoa no what.

I'm saying is yeah what you're saying is. instead of pushing shushuing away the. raccoon invite him in what I'm saying is. have you the dodo bird right on right. people have raccoons as pets and they're. the cutest little critters in the world. baby what is a dodo bird what does that. have to do with it it's a it's a website. no no dodo the rescue dodo rescue oh oh. yeah yeah yeah not dodo bird raccoons. that's usually like in it's usually.

illegal and it's like in foreign. countries like in Asia or something no. it's only legal in 16 states to own pet. raccoons so 16 of the 50 states said yes. yes it's California one of them no. [ __ ] way no way no [ __ ] way in. this state. you can they let the gays get married. here they're gonna not let you have a. raccoon oh I see the logic no look at. this Texas Florida Tennessee Nebraska. Arkansas South Dakota Illinois my home. Oklahoma Wisconsin Wyoming Vermont New. Jersey those are the only ones the.

surprise. well I'm actually quite surprised about. uh Vermont Vermont. you think that was a Bernie thing yeah. that was Bernie loves raccoons we're. gonna have raccoons. so just kill it then no yes yes shoot in. the head with a shot thank you no you. know what those little brains out I. really do love. I do love. they're so cute but they're vicious. little [ __ ] animals but I want you to. pull up a clip. this isn't this is It's Gonna Make You. Cry are you ready to get emotional today. I love it woman saves raccoon on side of.

road oh here we go. this made me cry on tick tock. hold on scroll down scroll down hold on. let me see if I can see her that one. right there second video second video. second video you ready to cry yeah go. ahead play it full screen and let me cry. let's get some tunes okay well because. the music is gonna make you cry I'm. getting horny yeah me too well yeah she. [ __ ] it at the beginning oh yeah and. then when she's done then she saves them.

ah. she's trying to save it but it doesn't. know it thinks it's going to hurt her. final leather jacket used it because he. was trying to bite her he didn't he. thinks he thinks she's trying to hurt. him because he already got hit by yeah I. know dude and he's dying. okay. why can't you do that with your raccoon. that's it that gets me man did you read. the last line no. she said. the the I like the white part of him not.

the black part that's what she said I'm. protecting the white part I was thinking. that no it says I'm just trying to give. him some comfort as he passes oh he died. yeah dude. but look what it says just trying to. give him some comfort as he passes and. isn't this what we all want in this. world a little bit of comfort as we pass. no. I want to be alone. you want to die alone yeah because if he. was stayed on the road well you were the. one.

should be [ __ ] Carter you like laying. in the room with his [ __ ] dying wife. I'm I'm saying people want comfort as. they pass but if he was on the road a. truck would have killed him right away. no he's in pain right now dude she's. giving him comfort as he passes you know. how much pain isn't right now I can't. wait to be there when you die. don't I'm going to tell you something. when you're dying yeah I'm gonna get you. naked every day I'm gonna scrub every. inch of your body I'm going to dry what. is a dry brush I'm gonna dry brush every. part of your body when you die I'm gonna. comb your little hair I'm gonna wax your.

little mustache Carlos what's up I'm. gonna teach you blinking language okay. Morse code okay because I'm not gonna be. able to feel my arm from my legs and be. able to talk okay we're gonna learn this. okay wait a minute when you're dying. yeah oh you think he'll last this guy's. dead in a decade 10 years Max no I'm. just saying maybe in five years I get. you're gonna be it's gonna take you 40. more years to die we'll live longer then. he can't why his behavior his lifestyle. you know Andreas wants to live for a. long time he's moving back to Spain.

right she won't be around either. no see I'll do blinking language right. cyanide oh no yeah yeah wait a minute if. you get to okay so listen if you get to. a hundred. and you're dying. you don't want to be assisted. you want to just die on your own. because I'm doing that I told you I'm. jumping in the lake but you you love. attention you love people. you love family you know what I've. thought about doing what is vlogging it.

vlogging your death are you gonna. monetize it yeah who's gonna get the. money somebody that I like someone you. care about yeah but I would I would do. like a you know what we don't see enough. people like people dying on the internet. yeah no but people like I feel like we. do no but people just go like oh this is. what I'm feeling. oh yeah this you know I mean you mean. vlogging. they're deaf. you're not gonna be able to talk how. would you you'd want to Vlog your death. yeah I'd be like okay so I thought I was.

gonna die a second ago right because it. might you know I mean my pancreas you. know what I mean it feels like it's on. fire and then you know my eyeballs. started jittering there it goes good. it's jittering oh I'm still alive Mr Lee. it's time for your bath. oh this [ __ ] again Mr Lee it's time for. your bath okay where do you want me to. scrub today. where would you like it you know. okay flip over. my [ __ ] looking little butthole scrub.

for Mr Lee no not that again that's what. I'm gonna do it. please and I'm gonna use my special. brush the one that doesn't have any. bristles. uh what is this fancy so Spain Ward won. the World Cup this right female World. Cup and then time time my time out you. can't you can't jump over that Spain won. the female World Cup yeah so here in. America you have to that's important. okay you can't just go Spain one day.

World Cup the World Cup the female World. Cup and then go on all right yeah. um. the men's World Cup isn't playing now I. know that's what I'm saying though for. the listeners I I just I already. automatically assumed there was a female. World Club I don't know but for the. listeners he's totally rumbly bumbly. he's drunk again and he's all right he's. adding in stuff like yeah anyway but won. the female World Cup they won it and the. president of the Spanish Federation uh.

kissed one of the players yeah. on the cheek no on the mouth. that looks like cheek oh that that's. probably just the cheek photo the lip. photo they probably don't post any yes. you know like the whole press and on. fire she said that she didn't like it oh. she said she didn't like it and is it. traditional the kiss on the mouth in. Spain no well there is that's Dalai Lama. Vibes yes yeah. I gotta tell you this guy let me see let.

me see solo photos of him let me see if. I'd let him kiss so what do you guys. think. yeah and that's the girl wait a minute. so he kisses this one he kissed a bunch. of other girls did he kiss anybody else. on the lips or just her yes her oh well. she was the captain oh she was the. captain Oh you gotta kiss the captain. you kissed the camera how about this not. grab the head. just kiss no no head I mean look the way. he's grabbing the head both heads on the. thing she has nowhere to move right what. did she say what's her statement.

she said I didn't like that and then. everybody asked for him to step down and. even the president of Spain the you know. the whole press even worldwide is he's. the president of the Spanish women's. team yeah the Spanish Federation Spanish. Federation yeah and so the president of. the men and women's the president of. Spain said you gotta go yes he goes in. the president Spain you know what he. really said he's like you know I like. this Behavior yeah this is what we do. yeah don't grab the head next if you. just kiss kiss kiss okay not because it.

was eternal look at this the rule is. always not on camera now this is the. prime minister of Spain yeah this guy. kiss on them kiss me on the [ __ ]. mouth right wow so Rudy if this guy. kissed you after a soccer game are you. letting him do it yeah right double. standard this is my point yeah this is. my point Mr Handsome they call him yo he. [ __ ] is and look at our guy go back. to that with Mr death yeah. man look at there's a picture of uh Mr. Handsome and uh uh [ __ ] Weekend at. Bernie's yeah she's.

look at how young and handsome that guy. is Roberto. yeah he's good looking he's not gonna. win he can't win though no he can't win. we're talking about viable options of. people that could win go let me get more. pictures of this guy. what's his name. Pedro Sanchez Pedro Sanchez how old was. he when he got into office. um 50 50 years old yeah yeah.

his daughter. no that's the princess of Spain she's. the princess of Spain Carlos is. bookmarking the princess so he can look. her up again perv by the way she's not. that's the military huh she's going to. the military they have to they have to. yeah they don't have a choice wow I'm. definitely joining the Spanish military. that's the Spanish military are those. [ __ ] military issued pants look at. those things. I thought that was the Hollywood gay. pipe right so it looks the same that. basically is the Spanish military yeah.

yeah you know those you know those. straps are foreign yeah. [Laughter]. yeah wow they're so handsome yeah do you. know why they have their chin up you. don't get anything in their eyes. wow clever by the way their shirts are. [ __ ] open with suspenders on yeah I. mean that's what a military guy looked. no no wonder there's no way is that.

really the military it is it really is. no it's not yes it is no it's not. there's no way. wow wow so that's like our Navy. yeah no stop that is insane that's not. them there's no way yes it is it's a. Spanish military but. fire force Spanish Legion. it's called The Legion yeah. does the Philippines have a military. yeah look look at Filipinos.

I think they probably got some leftover. stuff from us yeah. yeah I wouldn't [ __ ] with those guys. those guys know they're insane they're. insane they'll throw a box of spiders at. you. they'll get you good yeah what's Cisco. what's going on here with the face it's. Lady Gaga. [Laughter]. no you wouldn't [ __ ] with the Filipino. military they'd [ __ ] you up yeah Spanish. military though I'll take those guys on. any day.

that's nuts ah. who's that. that's the Philippine leader president. president right now yeah see those are. proper suits that's what the military. should wear buttoned all the way up yeah. you guys got your [ __ ] chest hair. showing. did you guys have to do like um Cadet. like military yeah yeah we all do yeah. we have to do it when you're 12 when. you're 12 to 15 you do Cadet do you know. that here yeah oh yeah I have to go to. boot camp. and we have to especially if your dad.

catches you smoking weed in the garage. then you definitely have to go to boot. camp so I did it when I was 12 we went I. went to Montana I had to do the mud. crawl you were mud crawling well you. didn't have my oh yeah because that was. before you yeah your years before for 20. miles we had to crawl. in a field. of just mud mud yeah yeah and you just. you're you know I mean it's in your face. it's on your Forum it's your forms in. your knees yeah and even if you get up. like that they kick your head back down. push you right back in right and go you.

young man back then they'd be like John. yeah. you can't breathe and you're 12 years. old you're a young kid yeah. and then you don't sleep for five days. put you in a cave and I had to go I had. to go it was it it was like uh. it was like a camp almost it was on a. lake. and uh every night we would go into our. little cabins. and we had to we had to play hide and go.

seek and the counselors uh would come. after you and if they found you they got. you and. yeah what. and if they get you they got you they. got you yeah how. well. if they get you they got. because when I did it right the mud. crawl we didn't have the hiding OC they. just got you thank God like what do you. mean by gotcha well they would say it. gotcha gotcha right and you're like I've.

been here like I didn't even get to hide. gotcha. and then your pants are removed right. it's a phrase you don't understand in. the same way that uh you know. or whatever yeah yeah. gotcha is our thing is our thing once. they get you they got you right it's an. American phrase pull the pants down and. they butt [ __ ] you no. what is wrong with you it's a Cadet.

military. exactly yes to give you a little tiny. little Spanky titles. gotcha gotcha they spank you thank you. but it's dead but they don't [ __ ] you. that's gross yeah it doesn't go in the. bottom no they smack you with it though. right sometimes it hits you know the the. rim of the butthole the rim well. actually often oddly enough yeah and. they go oops oops.

it would go in oopsie whoopsie right. what is going on what is that. Bobby I sent you this I know you I don't. watch your videos dude because they're. [ __ ] like they're [ __ ] I watch the. ones used is this claiming that Michael. Jackson is still alive yes this is one. of these conspiracy theories yeah wow. what do we think. yeah yeah do you think you think he went. you think he removed all of his surgery. that's the is that what this is saying. it could be him. that looks nothing like him.

that looks. nothing like him. even a little bit that's being claimed. to me does he claim to be Michael. Jackson. does he sound like him. let me hear him let me hear what he. sounds like I was not in the hospital. time I was I was in interim back and. forth from I will tell you this. yeah that person is not Michael Jackson. uh but they probably have the same Vibe.

thing going on yeah yeah yeah yeah did. the same thing going on he went in. everland ranch right and he never left. exactly yeah you get what I'm saying. like if you put a thigh out. of a little boy home gotcha he would buy. it he'd bite it yeah no nibblers in fact. in that interview they should have. brought up. leg meet some boy little boy like a. mannequin leg Yeah and you see his teeth.

chattering yeah yeah he's drooling you. know he's into it yeah. right and then bite right he Moon walks. out of there with a boy's leg in his. mouth yeah. Rudy tell us tell me what's been going. on in your little life. um how's your boyfriend good he built me. a PC. did he really yeah and then I had to. hide it because at the koala hates games. she called me a complained why she hates. video games because I wanted to go. outside and I wonder now she's doing.

this [ __ ] yeah did my headphones. work or no they're really good cool. really good wait a minute though he. built you a PC for playing what game uh. stardew Valley Hogwarts. valorant A lot of games a lot of games. yeah I'm obsessed with starting a valley. right now really. you start a farm yeah you wanna do co-op. yeah look at this bonding do you want to. co-op farm with me yeah but I think. might get mad at us who cares and it's. so funny because we I could work on the.

farm when you're not around so when you. go back on you're like oh Bobby like did. this so yeah you'll just do her farm for. her yeah no we do it together that's. fine yeah yeah yeah on your farm what do. you have so far I have the greenhouse. already you do have the greenhouse yeah. you're doing the bundles bundles yeah. you're doing the bundles I I have so. much I have. um. yeah I have the bar and I have the coop. what do you have in the barn. cows sheeps pigs your pigs already yeah.

you're getting truffles truffles already. you're far along then yeah that's pretty. far are you being real. I am wow yeah that's amazing yeah thank. you for being a bad friend anybody yet I. can marry someone. yeah you could oh so what are you a girl. or boy girl okay so do you know Elliot. who's that. the guy that lives I think downstairs in. the beach yeah yeah yeah yeah Sebastian.

I don't know he lives with maroon. Robin's his mom oh okay he's the emo guy. with the black hair yeah that guy look. at the Riverland and never came out what. who went to Neverland and never got out. we going. I have a question oh please okay so when. I'm cleaning Tita Bobby's house always. stop stop no no you let her talk. oh but why no let her talk don't let him.

get it watch no watch go ahead you're. saying no I know [ __ ] him I'm just. confused as to what it is because in. your bathroom Okay stop stop you stop go. ahead rude there's like near the bathtub. there's like a jelly jelly thing that. looks like a jellyfish yeah and it's. like really squishy and I thought it was. like a you know like Duck Duck toys yeah. a duck toy yeah her bathtub I thought it. was like toys I love Duck toys so I.

tried touching it and it's like like. sticky and Squishy yeah so I had to ask. Matas my grandma because she cleanse. his house too yeah and she said oh it's. his sex story it is his sex toy yeah but. why are there so many yeah you know one. would ask why there are so many there's. one in the kitchen one in the pantry. okay no no where are the rest are there. they're all over the place all over yeah.

like a dozen there's got to be a dozen. Baker's Dozen no half a dozen half a. dozen and it's like. it's like a robot thing like suction. there's like different kinds right. and he leaves them for you to claim oh. interesting Tito. but I thought first it was like the duck. toy it is a duck toy. robotic tech toy in Japan yeah because. when you use it he goes quack quack.

quack. okay and. um you know stuff you find around the. house shut your [ __ ] mouth you know. did you sign an NDA no well okay okay. what about the maggots. what about the maggots. what about the maggots. what do you think not one more word. about the magnets well what about the. matter they're my friends you have the. raccoon I have the maggots that is true. no why do you have a record last week.

I'll go get going and then the next week. there there's maggots already how did. they what what's going on over there I. grow them. have you heard of a science yeah right. and I want to explore I want to know how. they work and how they behave and I'm. I'm jotting down their behavioral. maggots don't just show up out of the. blue maggots are currently in your house. that means a fly first found its way. into your home through an entry point. decided to lay eggs. flies tend to flock to rotting material. spoiled food old garbage or sex toys and.

they use that as their breeding ground. interesting. the maggots were in the cat food yeah. nah yeah you know yeah in the sex toy. it says it could come from anywhere okay. it's in the [ __ ] was it not in the. cat food was there maggots on any of the. sex toys. oh my God is there just in the cafe just. in the cabinet but guess what in the. cabinet in the cat food where is the cat. food. the aisle thing in the kitchen oh but.

you said there was a sex toy in the. kitchen as well yeah interesting how far. away was the sex toy to the [ __ ] not. far no okay far yeah but that's still um. your honor your honor that's still. you're a proof but I don't get why you. have a sex story in your kid your. kitchen why do you have something in the. pantry. can I tell you why. and I'll tell you why we're waiting I'll. tell you why yeah the reason why my. friend is none of your business but I'll.

tell you right is I energize them in. different areas of my house interesting. okay they're all chargeable oh right so. all my plugs in my bedroom where I have. my phones and my gadgets and stuff like. that that makes sense my bathroom has. two plugged in sex toys yeah that I'm. energizing and there's a third one. because I'll tell you what happens tap. please I'll tell you what happens. they run out of energy do they vibrate. and they swirl around right sometimes.

I'm like. you got to plug it in and I'm like oh. [ __ ] so I grabbed another one um. and I go to the kitchen so you're. walking around with your dick hard out. around your house just grabbing sex toys. I'm not walking I'm running you're. running because I'm wet it's in the. bathtub I do it in the bathtub yeah. you're always wet yeah yeah so you stay. in the bathtub and you get out you go. grab a toy bring it in go grab another. one and you do this repeatedly I don't. know why we're even talking about why. don't you have any outlets in your. bathroom keeping them all in the. bathroom plug them all in there because.

I have like electric I like your. toothbrush I don't know what we're. talking about this right now we got to. develop an electric toothbrush that's. also a sex toy okay can I just say this. right I already talked I already. admitted that I use them and I don't. think it's wrong to use them it's not. that women have vibrators and they use. them yeah and I'm using my sex toys. there's nothing wrong with that does. really have to clean them no he does she. doesn't and I asked you to do I've never. asked you to do it but first the first. time I clean I didn't know what it was. that's yours.

it's awkward I agree it is your fault. mine yeah you gotta know what it is you. gotta know what it is but it looks like. a jellyfish of course that's why it. sells so well that's one of the best on. the market yeah what do you mean we all. want to [ __ ] a jellyfish you've never. seen those things in the wild I can't. wait to put my [ __ ] in one of those. things do you use gloves yeah okay yeah. okay you're fine yeah yeah but when you. look at the opening you think that. that's what a jellyfish's mouth looks. like I don't don't. oh it doesn't look like that oh yeah.

that's what jellyfish sound like yeah if. you pick them up out of the ocean they. go oh you know what I'm gonna do now you. don't want to do I'm gonna hide them. from you okay oh and then you gotta find. them now you get paid per toy you find. 10 bucks a toy you find them you get but. you are missing out. on sex toys yeah no I've used uh I've. used uh not but not pocket Wheels not no. but not the vibrating you know what I. mean well buy me one for my birthday. really yeah I'd love one I will buy you. one buy me the top of the line one and. I'll use it okay but I'll have to keep. it here at the studio.

you're gonna use it every time you do. whiskey Ginger or something yeah I. haven't done that podcast in years I. just go jerk off in that room okay yeah. yeah I'm so down will you do that you. buy me a nice I'll buy you one nice one. yeah yeah well let me say this Rudy it's. nice to have you back it's awful that. you try to call out Tito for having a. very healthy normal sex toy uh uh sex. toys at his house I'm on your team. and I want to say thank you for the. pillow and thank you for being a bad. friend.

oh. foreign. [Music].