The Rock's Oscar | Ep 123 | Bad Friends

hey guys uh the moment house live. episode we did is only around for a. couple more days couple more days you. can go to momenthouse.com bad friends. moment house dot com slash bad friends. you can see the live episode we did and. look on look at the reviews people loved. it it was it's one of our best episodes. of all time thousands and thousands if. you don't watch it now you can they. watch it again you can re if you watched. it originally you can replay it as many. times because you buy if you buy it you. can re-watch it yeah and it's only. available for a couple more days i think. maybe till the end of the week yeah but. go to momenthouse.com bad friends the.

link is in the description below watch. the live so we can do more of those. lives because we had so much fun. [Music]. doc doc we're going to give you a. vaccine so you don't get sick anymore. doc oh. my mom's here how much did you sell a. gram of crackpot.

don't come out. mushy. [Laughter]. [Music]. you two are bad friends who are these. two idiots. white dude i'm an asian dude.

you two are disgusting. oh you two or something we're bad. friends. announcement um. you know we have a schedule we book you. know people that do our podcast it's. kind of like. not a big deal but you know it's a big. deal it's a big deal yeah it's a big. deal you know we give them a platform. yeah right we don't have a lot of people. come on speaking of a guy that. definitely needs platforms right.

figuratively literally yeah yeah yeah. doc willis decided once again to not. just book today. 10 minutes before we're shooting he's. sick not with kovid but with a. mysterious illness because fancy what. did he say allegedly he ate something. bad. so we took him to a fancy restaurant. this is who doc willis is in san diego. like ace a steakhouse high-end high-end. steakhouse right on the same night that. of my show where he did. 35 minutes exactly when he was supposed.

to do 10. maybe. seven minutes. and we just found out that um he snuck. away from the steak house and went to. 7-eleven and got their taquitos. right and those are like 45 cents yeah. yeah meanwhile we bought him an 85 85. t-bone steak. right so so he's sick with stomach flu. or something yeah no so he says he eats. terribly do you believe it. do you believe that he's sick. i well because i got to tell you.

something oh come on drew you know. alcohol poisoning sick yeah from wine. yeah let's see if he's got to say. something for himself. let's get mad be mad. let's drill him. oh are you calling him now you call him. now if you call him consecutively now. he'll know like something's up. i know but if he picks up with me. would you be mad or not yeah you got to. draw him oh would i be upset that he. picked up for you yeah no because uh. he's probably not wanting to answer but. then he sees if we both called he thinks. something's going on okay here we go.

well let's leave him a message a harsh. one okay. but i feel like i'm gonna go hard and. then you're gonna back off. no i'm not i'm gonna go hard too but you. want me to open though oh yes. you're calling okay what's up fam. leave a voicemail doc willis just leave. a message and i'll get back to you as. soon as possible. you know doc um a couple years ago when. i was doing this podcast with andrew um. i thought you know what dude you popped. in my head i'm like i'm gonna help this.

[ __ ] guy out man. i'm gonna put him on my popular [ __ ]. podcast. and i want to resurrect or whatever you. know what i mean and we've done you a. [ __ ] favor dude. we put you on our podcast at your family. and let me say something to you man you. [ __ ] betray us bro. bro. when we book you right please [ __ ]. show up man you would show up to amazon. or whatever that [ __ ] warehouse that. you [ __ ] work at you would show up. for like your [ __ ].

fat fat [ __ ]. right. what you know right you would show up to. a liquor store if they were gonna close. at two in the [ __ ] morning dude well. you your little tummy hurts bro. you [ __ ]. [ __ ] fast. face. hey buddy uh i i hope you're uh getting. better uh get well soon we'll see you. soon. i mean we gave it to him.

we hammered that guy bro i'm telling you. we gave that guy something to think. about bro let me tell you something dude. he's not a joke he's going to remember. that now for the rest i have to call him. back now what are you talking about i. have to call him back now no we hammered. him no no no you didn't i look like an. [ __ ] no no you said that you would. [ __ ] do it with me dude you were. beating him up and then i came in at the. end oh god good cop cop yes no yeah yeah. because we're not police officers isn't. that crying well they defunded us but i. got to tell you yeah we had we we. manhandled him right there no no this.

was like he was rodney king. i was the guy hitting him right and. you're at the [ __ ] i drove back to. the stage yeah you're back at the. station. cause i was like what they're doing. i don't know what's going on out there. yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah no i gotta call. him back that's [ __ ] [ __ ] dude. oh you want me to hammer him now yeah. i'm wrong okay. i'm gonna give it to him now he's going. to answer on this at this point. no i'm just going to apologize you don't. have to hammer him no we should hammer. him again no no because you're going to. open it. you want no you go ahead and do do what. you have to do.

do what you think is right i don't know. why you think you need to call him back. i think we got no i know because the. thing is i sound like an [ __ ] i don't. i think he's going to feel literally bad. he's probably going to watch the episode. and know that you're that you're just. teasing. but you should leave like a heartfelt. real message. a hammer my fur like hammer room up top. no no i already hammered. you reach doc willis leave the message. and i'll get back to you we're going to. be so sad if we found out like he's. dying yeah yeah. anyway.

i'm sorry. you know that was a little too far um. i hope your little belly. feels better. and you know if you need anything i'm. busy but. i could suggest pepto bismol emmodium. 80. call me if you need anything you can. call me and andrew wants to say. something. you're fired. [Music]. [Laughter]. get better doc willis we hope he's. better the guys literally had covered.

more time than i thought you could get. cover yeah. i i didn't think you could get it more. than four times i'm not joking i've. never even heard that i read an article. i don't think you can how many times. what's the maximum amount of time. somebody's got in coconut for real yeah. because honestly i bet you the ceiling. is like three and they're like after. that you didn't get it again yeah. you can get covered up to. what. people have yeah multiple times yeah. what's the most times people have gotten. coveted with the most the the most. somebody's gotten covered.

i just i was on the phone with uh. joe derosa he 43. 43 is not real not. real there's no one. positive 43 times yeah okay okay okay. but yeah that's not yeah yeah yeah. that's still a lot. dave's. he's driving this look at him and he's. still smiling he lost an eye because of. it yeah look at him poor guy yeah go. down a little bit let me see what it. says there dave72. uh is a driving instructor and a. musician who spent the last 10 months. with an active coronavirus infection. visiting hospital seven times the immune. system was vulnerable to the virus after. leukemia diagnosis they came with the.

great so he's sick. said this is sad so he just had he just. had it 72 times in one gigantic covens i. think he just did it like he probably. did like 40 one day and then 32 the. other day right he just kept testing. over and over oh my god bobby lee. bobby lee what. top gun. you saw. let me say this top gun yeah. not kidding the best movie i've seen. action movie i've seen in years in. years i told you right no i know but.

dude it's so good no beyond yeah miles. teller [ __ ] amazing you're cemented. forever as one of the best actors to. ever live yeah yeah the kid is done he. did it yeah he could quit now and be. fine after fantastic four stick. and. i mean i know fantastic four's like one. of the worst movies yeah but what else. would he even was good. phenomenal amazing guy hit it out of the. park yeah yeah very talented guy but. yeah. top gun was so good yeah that i'm not. kidding. i did this during some of the. performance yeah get him. shoot him yeah dude it was the the dog.

fights i want i was just so lucky i. nev because you know i always go to the. fancy one so i do the chair thing me too. right i go to the chair and i go lean. back right for top gun i didn't i lent i. didn't lean it back lean forward and i. was leaning forward like that the whole. time yeah that's so dope and if i if tom. cruise's dick was right here dude yeah i. would have sucked it. what is this i want to be a scientist. what are you doing playing this in the. middle of a thing hold on hold on. can we do this conversation and you do. the clip fancy is on the same he's he is.

going to get fired yeah what is going on. with you guys all right. no tom let me say this tom cruise i'm i. am dead serious i'm i will join. scientology. i will join scientology did he do a. welcome thing in your movie yes and it. made me smile yeah and we all cheered. the theater i've never seen that before. well hello i'm tom cruise he goes hey. hey we did this for you this is all for. you and i guess. me. everyone clapped right i went me. me tom cruise yeah for me everyone. clapped in the theater literally people. were like yeah tom yeah he's the last.

movie star. he's the last he is one of the last. moves he's the last action star sorry he. is the last action star because if. daniel craig is done with. dub seven then that's it yeah he really. is the last because because the rock. doesn't count anymore the rock is uh. bigger than he's like a. i don't know he's he's like amazon he's. too big now. the rock is the biggest there is he's a. movie star. but not an action star anymore he's an. action star no because now when you see. the rock in action movies they're always.

kitschy like dark shazam or whatever. that movie is yeah they're always. kitchen they're called dark shazam. that was the alternative name for black. adam was dark shazam. i literally thought it was dark shazam. the studio was like should we call it. dark shazam. yeah. this is the problem this is the problem. yeah yeah. i had a friend growing up named black. adam um this is the problem. with this when you see the rock in films. you only see the rock.

that doesn't transform anymore yeah tom. cruise still. yeah was maverick in that [ __ ] movie. yeah when you saw it you were like mavis. back like when i look at it is that. ethan hunt i don't think that i don't. think that but when the rock's on i go. that's that's the rock i don't care if. he's a lawyer he's a rock but he's not a. lawyer because a lawyer never looks like. that that's insane but doesn't he do. some serious movies or no he's never. done like a lawyer thing or every time. he does like one of these buddy comedies. with kevin hart or whatever they they do. have like sweet moments yeah but he's. got to do i want him to do a movie.

where there's no action this is going to. be the [ __ ] task he's doing san. andreas too they're doing that one. they're banging that one out again. another earthquake. doc savage. do you know what that is what. doc savage is uh the man of bronze. what yeah the man of bronze you don't. know this no this is a this is real i do. know what this is. it's a scientist uh created him as like. the original superhero it's it's yeah. yeah they're just another action they're. grasping they're they're digging as deep.

as they can because like when tom cruise. was in magnolia he played you know what. i mean. unbelievable right unbelievable not an. action movie nope his acting was superb. super movie right so i think the rock. needs to do something like that but can. he do it here's the the problem is the. muscle the muscles he's gonna do what. he's gonna do what [ __ ] what's his. name did for the machinist because he. should be uh yeah he's gonna lose he's. gonna no he's gonna weigh like 70 pounds. dude if the rock lost. we got down to 70 pounds right well i'd. be dead yeah and just the movie was.

called. the gnarliest hiv i don't know no yeah. hip city. or i don't know what like he's sick. what's another show what's another city. outside of philadelphia yeah yeah. philadelphia my bad yeah it could be uh. baltimore west chester pennsylvania yeah. yeah west chester yeah i can't say that. so just say baltimore ball well you. can't say west chester say west. westchester westchester pennsylvania. anyway um if he did like you know got. down to 70 pounds no he can't hold him.

he could he weighs like 300 people if he. wants an oscar he can. no chance you just gotta look you know. what he needs to do 260 pounds let's say. he gets down to a hundred pounds yeah. okay we'll do that as a producer i go. okay that's the lip that's like the. highest you can go 125 give him 125. all right he'll still look bad he'll. look unbelievably bad you'll look bad. yeah yeah at 125 and then you think he. can get an oscar. and then yeah for westchester the movie. westchester because that alone i think.

because you know they'll eat that up the. rock gets monkey he's getting meth his. method right yeah a monkey pox he gets. that he gets them he gets the monkey. pops right. and he's eating him alive and so he is. in the movie he's used to he is an old. action hero who gets monkey pox he can't. fight anymore. and no no no he can't no he's got to be. no because that's already gonna in my. mind is gonna be like ah he's still. doing. right trying right so he's gotta be. something that. he's never like we can't even foresee. him doing.

something out of the box. like he's like. what could he have been doing uh he. he has a uh. he's a florist. you ever seen the movie the florist no. really have you seen the movie the. florist. you've never seen this no. such a good movie okay what all right. then forget the flu you've never seen. the florist no. it's wonderful. it's a wonderful film okay good good um. i've never seen it okay. right but it's low but lower post give.

me another job not what's even why can't. he be a florist. he works at the airport he's a baggage. handler. he's someone that works at a kiosk in a. mall. he doesn't yeah he doesn't he doesn't i. don't know what he does perfumes in. nordstrom's he has a kiosk at the mall. but you know what it is huh he does. fluffy. the gabriel yes merch yeah. yeah he sells gabriel glaciers merch at. the mall right so he has the bobblehead. posters right. right and um so in the movie he. he still we got to bring him down to 150.

in the beginning of the movie yeah right. and then is fluffy losing the weight. with him are they doing well there's a. team fluffy's in it oh and fluffy has. monkey pox. okay for the fluffy has monkey pie is. that how the rock got monkey pox yeah. [ __ ] him to that wow yeah but we're. not doing a comedic way. what do you mean oh it's love it's pure. love okay because the rock is a huge fan. his character let's call him david. no why it's just not all right don't. give me like a bible name give me. something else. keto his name is keto he knows because.

that's very islandy. what's wrong he's from the island what. do you mean he's [ __ ] got samoan. vlot always russian. well just we don't ever explain it. yeah yeah. vlad what's his last name. perez perez we do two different. he's russian. he's russian spanish yeah because. acting's so good yeah vlad perez. he's got to be kind of a half mexican. because of gabriel right that's how he. rides a circle he's a huge gabriel.

glaciers fan right and he has this and. then one day gabriel is playing some. sort of stadium next door dodger he's at. dodger stadium let's shoot it in l.a. i'll let you know already here yeah yeah. all right so he's playing dodger stadium. dodger stadium. but he wants to see how his kiosk is. doing. he's he's stopped by westfield mall yeah. in sherman oaks yeah yes. no the mall in west covina oh yeah okay. that's even better okay. i could believe that yeah yeah so. gabriel bounces in.

wobbles it or whatever i don't know how. he walks i think they push him i think. yeah yeah yeah remember how they rolled. violet when she got swollen in willy. wonka and they put her over i love. gabriel so i want to make fun of him i. love him we're just teasing okay so he. comes and he kind of. rolls in. [Laughter]. and you know he's vlad sees him yeah and. he's nervous because that's his idol. right. but then gabriel. there's an attraction instant attraction. he's like i love this right he doesn't.

show up to his gig. he he doesn't go to dodger stadium so we. cut to a scene right everyone's there. right you just cut into. right some hotel next to the [ __ ]. west covina and they're it's like a 30. minute love scene we'll see this listen. it's going fluffy. fluffy and then and then you know cross. cut two fluffy fluffy fluffy and they're. made and they're making love it's so. good they're making itself you know what. i want to do some cgi [ __ ] i should. direct this right you know do i get to.

[ __ ] dp yeah or dp it right i want to. do a thing where you know how um i don't. know if you saw fight club but you know. how they zoom in i don't know if you saw. a fight club. named one guy that's never seen. all right. you know you've seen fly club yeah. better right yeah you know fight club. yeah you know fight club right you know. how um fincher would zoom into the back. of the refrigerator and you know man do. all those like really intricate so i. want to do that with blood vessels. oh wow right. yeah fluffy right and you put the camera.

inside the mouth and you go in and you. see the monkey pox oh bubbling yeah i. mean they're. bubbling dude. they're [ __ ] bubble wait what. are there real monkeys no but. we would use like they would the noise. you hear when the monkey box is. spreading is monkey noise you know what. we do we would slow down real monkey. noises. so they would you know be ambiguous but. you wouldn't get what i'm saying we will.

so we go into the mouth right you see. the [ __ ] blood. right. it's coming down gabriel's you know i. mean it's a long travel yeah i'm not a. fat joke it's not a fat joke. goes out the penis and into vlad perez. yeah the monkey pox the monkey box right.

and then. i don't do i don't know he's pregnant. with a monkey. no because he's just got that no no i. thought that's how you get pregnant no. no yeah no it's not [ __ ]. and he's a guy that would not make any. sense what are you talking about. 2022 papa anything can happen at this. point. okay you want to incorporate that yeah i. mean make this movie fantasy if we're. going to be fantasy okay how about this. though so he gets pregnant with his baby. here's the coke then and he's like you. got to lose all this weight. perez. we think he's a guy.

but he's really a woman transitioning. but he didn't get all the parts. so vlad is. vlad is transitioning into becoming a. man. yes but she still has the women parts so. she can he can still give birth right. and so i guess gabriel's [ __ ] him. from behind okay right because he. doesn't know there's a [ __ ] there. and he instead this is good stuff. this is good stuff the fans are gonna. love this i think is that right how do. we get from him not discovering that his.

dick is in the butthole not the vagina. he can't see it. exactly it's dark. two ways to look at that but yeah yeah. anyway we'll figure that out we'll. figure it out well right so he gets. monkey pox and he gets pregnant is that. what you're saying correct. and in order to have the baby the doctor. says you need to lose all this weight. and so he then needs but i thought the. whole thing that he was losing because. we were basically on philipadelphia too. that he would got sick from the monkey. pox and that's what this is a good i'm. creatively working it out oh we're gonna.

okay so. how about a combination right the monkey. puck is [ __ ] his body up right yeah. plus the baby right yeah is [ __ ] his. her body hitting it the monkey the. monkey baby it's a monkey. oh. yeah. so it's a sci-fi a little bit yeah i. didn't know so the monkey part. i know what it is here's the ear as a. director to check it out yeah please. director the monkey box is going through. uh gabriel's body right out the penis. and it joins them with regular sperm. sure right so we see all that the.

[ __ ] monkey parks and the sperm. colliding. right like it's a traffic. traffic trap they're merging they're. merging and they. one of them. they join together right and then we go. into um. vlad's body yeah and you can see this. now it looks like sperm but it's got. hair on it. and it's kind of like you. yeah yeah it looks like yeah it looks. like it's got hair in fact i'll do an. andy circus thing and i'll do the. [ __ ] green screen stuff where's your.

face yeah i mean i mean i mean you don't. even have to do that but i could do the. wiggles. better help. life can be overwhelming andrew yes it. can and many people are burned out. without even knowing it i was burned out. many times during the covid and even. after that recently i was burned out i. had some things happening in my life. and i had to turn to better help and get. therapy you know symptoms can include. lack of motivation my friend. irritability fatigue and even more i. think i have a lot of these things. that's why i do the other day you. probably remember i did you were burned.

i said i'm burned out yeah i called you. i was bummed i was super low and i said. you got to talk to fancy because i can't. listen to his stupid accent anymore. that's what he actually said that's what. i literally said but i gotta tell you. therapy has helped us uh has helped me. on a personal note i i like it i think. it's uh doing something like this is tr. is traditionally cheaper than doing. in-person therapy which i i enjoy a lot. and i want to do it from the comfort of. my home because i don't like driving. somewhere far away to wait in a waiting. office it's customized online therapy. that offers video phone and even live. chat sessions with your therapist so you. don't have to see anyone on camera if.

you don't want to that's kind of the. best part is that you can choose uh. whether you see someone and talk to. someone face to face you also can pick a. new. professional licensed therapist if the. one you're assigned isn't working with. you it's much more affordable and you. can get matched with someone in under 48. hours and listen our listeners are gonna. get 10 off their first month at. betterhelp.com bad friends that's better. he lp.com. bad friends hello fresh. hello fresh hello fresh you know what i. love hello fresh it makes me feel like a. chef. well because you get farm fresh.

ingredients delivered to your door and. yeah and look i'm not i'm not good at. shopping i don't like going to the. grocery store cooking but the directions. are very like they lay it right out they. lay it right right you can follow it yep. and when you eat it it's like a really. high quality it tastes like a gourmet. meal made in your own house you get farm. fresh seasonal produce easy to make. recipes delivered right your door every. single week and these ingredients travel. from the farm to your door it's all. about convenience with hello fresh not. only do the ingredients come. pre-portioned so you're not over buying. or wasting food but it's easier than. ever getting.

filling meals. on the table in a snap with options like. family friendly or quick and easy. recipes yeah you can pick from uh. favorites from 50 different weekly. options skip weeks when you need to if. you're out of town you don't want. anything delivered change your delivery. date update your preferences all in the. hellofresh app it's so easy to use you. can customize your favorite dishes with. hello fresh custom offerings um there's. so much good stuff on here and. i really do enjoy because i hate grocery. shopping i want something easy delivered. that i can make fast at my house yeah if. you want to get excited to see a box.

outside your door get hello fresh get. hella fresh you get your stomach goes. crazy yeah it does it goes. yeah yeah yeah go to hellofresh.com. badfriend16 and use the code. badfriends16 for up to 16 free meals and. three free gifts that's hellofresh.com. bad friends 16 and use code bad friends. 16 for up to 16 free meals and three. gifts hello fresh america's number one. meal kit thing you know that you ever. see that movie at the mask jim carrey's. the man no not the jim carrey month the.

no. i've never seen this movie is this it. what happens in this film oh that guy. that guy yeah yeah that's eric that's. eric staltz yeah is he alive. who the character's not the real guy. that's based on dies like in the movie. oh he does yeah. what's his name again. there is a real guy yeah that was based. on a real guy that guy. that's the guy right there yeah that's a. guy right there it was elephant man. right yeah rocky dennis no i think he's.

not elephant. english. what is this guy then this is alpha. mantu. the sequel the second one yeah got it. yeah. yeah you got that right there. i still ever watch it be nice. hello so anyway um that kind of looks. like me maybe we can. it kind of does that kind of looks like. yeah so anyway like there's enough. qualities i have a i have like a wide. face like that. and red hair we'll talk about that later. but uh can we finish the movie sure all.

right so the baby comes out hair on it. right. and it could be sort of like a heartfelt. moment like like a rocky dennis thing. where it's like. you know i mean vlog raising this kid. and it could be all about like bullying. and we can put fuse all that stuff in. there so that's we're trying to get vlad. we're trying to get we got to get. himself the rock a [ __ ] oscar here. right right so don't worry about it. monko. monko is his name yeah he's the kids. kids. maybe i don't know well that's not going. to talk about bullying at all what. that's not going to help the bullying.

yeah monko. you named him uncle is that too close i. think it's right on the money yeah oh. it's too close you'd have to name him. something well you throw out because. you're helping you write this you mean. not right. um chimp chimpy chimpy. is chimpy better rangy rangi rangi rangi. we're angry and he has red hair he's. right. right you know they call us yeah. australia and in the you know the kid. monkey pox baby little rangy ranillo. ranking my bad bad is eight years old. bullied comes home with a black eye. and vlad could do like hey kiddo hey.

ranky. i mean. dad can we change my name. i don't like rangi why not. i don't know i just do you don't think. he would like that name no i'm i'm i'm. i'm i'm saying oh yeah oh you're doing. dialogue yeah why not um because it just. seems cause the kids make fun of me and. you know. so. that's true fight back okay. i will. because i have monkey strength that's. exactly right like a chimp strength you. have chimp strength whoa no no thumbs.

but you have strength you have strength. you have a lot of strength right and. then maybe there's a moment where he. fights back and and guess what guess who. shows up to help him fight. the rock the rock. so you can fuse in a little bit of the. action at the end so the kid's getting. bullied and the rock shows up right and. he literally and i mean we should shoot. it this way yeah beats the [ __ ] out of a. bunch of eight-year-olds and i mean like. pummels their heads well it wouldn't. seem because he lost a hundred pound i. mean he's down to a hundred pounds still. got it he's still got it he's still got. it yeah the rock never loses that yeah.

yeah yeah what's this movie called black. adam. [Laughter]. but let me but let me show you a video. that made me smile that made my heart. warm go ahead show them the two little. kids by the way this is you want to know. what kind of fans we have we kind of. beautiful fans. these are the type of fans we have that. let their children sing our songs and my. favorite part about this. is listen when it comes up to cuss words. and watch their faces.

[Music]. it's good. [Laughter]. [Music]. yeah this is awesome. [Music]. it's awesome you know let's push pause. for a second there's a woman that bought.

the rights to happy birthday. no yeah i thought it's public domain no. somebody bought the rights for it i. think seriously i think this is what i. heard i don't know this is true but this. is what i heard through just rumor. that an old lady one day just decides. you know i wonder if somebody bought. that or has the rights of happy birthday. and then bought the rights and then she. makes warner chappelle music previously. copyrighted the song in u.s and. collected fees 2015 the copyright came. was declared invalid and warner spell. agreed to pay back 14 million in. licensing fees for happy birthday to you.

no one's got it now. but back in the day i mean in the 50s or. something. anyway the rumor mill yeah but the thing. is um i want um maybe you know i'll let. that one go but oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh. no no we did we sent a letter to them. they all oh okay yeah we're bringing a. suit but here's the here's the here's. the wild [ __ ] yeah. they. the dad or whoever was like hey man we. can't pay this lawsuit because we had. said you always licensing he said how. much yeah and i said you know how much.

one of the kids one of the kids yeah. yeah because we need some we need some. help around here because these guys are. these guys suck. so uh the kid on the right agrees that. he can fill in. um and the kid on the left is gonna be. his assistant so cool cool yeah get. these [ __ ] guys out of here man i'll. tell you that right now these two yeah. they're gone my girlfriend sent me. something the other day as a joke but i. i looked it up and it's true i want you. to i'm going to show you this. and i can't believe i even never knew. about this but it's basically um.

so these two were siamese twins have we. talked about these two no and one of. them was gay. what's their name. oh but look at. uh simon if you think. you know this said if you think your. life is bad. these are siamese brothers. only one of them they just died they. think they died a couple years only one. of them is gay but they they have to. share one ass.

that's insane right yeah. no. yeah it's true i looked at it but one of. them siamese twins do siamese to it only. one of the brothers was gay yeah so you. would just have to be gay at some point. well you know i but. you know. [Laughter]. is it true. it says i mean it's all over reddit and. stuff wait go down to it let's go down. there's got to be a real article.

there's no way this is real. i mean the photo if you look at the. photo one guy is making out with another. man while the other one's just going. like the sex life of conjoined twins in. the atlantic well what do you would you. do i think about that all the time of. like well i'm not whose side are you on. what do you mean like let's you and i. are siamese twins i'm the gay one right. right and the way they're attached is. they're attached at their hips at their. hip but they're facing each other. right. what's so funny.

because they're constantly facing each. other wait how are we facing each other. if we share a butt that's impossible if. we share an ass we can't be facing each. other that's they're look at them. they're look look at these two. no they're conjoined all right they're. nuts below yeah they're their ass is. below us but we you and are facing each. other how do you do that how would you. do that what do you mean. how would you do what well what would. you do if that what so he won't you do. so i'm gay i'm making out with my. boyfriend right. i would expect you to look away.

that's what my theory is. no i'd be staring right at you guys no. no that's none of your business though. you know what i put like a curtain up. like you know i mean like i would get a. wall of some sort right or. what i would just put on vr headset and. disappear. that's what you do yeah if you guys were. [ __ ] and i mean it's like well i. wouldn't but that's a thing do you have. to ask me every time you get it in the. ass do you have to like ask for. permission and being your brother coming. in hot no no you've got to give me your. brother. i wouldn't allow it no spontaneity sex. because i don't think they sheer.

sensation. so nobody would feel it i think one of. the brothers feel it i think the other. one doesn't imagine you're gay and when. you get [ __ ] ass only i feel it. that's what i'm saying right so if you. felt the penetration yeah. that would be cruel because i would get. nothing out of it nothing. yeah you'd be no just knowing that your. brother's getting [ __ ] in the ass. isn't that fun enough. yeah but you wouldn't want it because. you're not gay i know but you're my. you're my brother we're fighting all the. time yeah yeah this is payback or child. where does the people how is their penis. uh situated.

dude they must pee. yeah of course i mean they probably have. up one p maybe they share a penis how. when they're attached by the torso like. you share a penis if we jerk off i i. chug once you talk once i tug once you. talk once if we. switch hands oh we had the one penis. yeah like i jerk it then you jerky. we would we would switch days. uh one day is your day one yeah that's. your day. all right i think that's fine that's. fair fine right. why so why is it just the individual oh. look see they have two penises yeah.

honestly yeah. i got to tell you what. top gun was the best movie that i've. seen years yeah. and then jurassic don't watch jurassic. park the oh they they did a new one yeah. my friend gene and i walked out of it. terrible oh my god wait this is funny. what razzle you know razzle yeah he was. in the theater when you were there i. know you texted me and i texted bobby. and i was like hey why did you walk out. of jurassic park yeah and you and you. wrote how do you know that yeah it's. weird that you would know that yeah and.

i and i was. we walk out and we're about to leave the. theater and we're like both of us are. just appalled by what we it was that bad. here's what it was did you see it yeah. what does it gotta do with tomatoes did. it make any money though i bet you it. made all the all the money yeah so it. doesn't matter it doesn't matter i'm not. no i'm happy that they're making the. money but it tanked that bad you think. it was annoyingly. bad it wasn't bad in a good way. dialogue what's the thing that's bad. about it no it's just it was basically. two different storylines essentially.

that was going on. and they were merging these two. storylines into one. storyline at the end or towards the mid. and. the middle act right and. it was annoying to watch bat boat but. and also it's just certain scene they. just didn't. you know some of the takes you know i. mean. come on that's the take you used it was. like that yeah. i i felt like that but pratt's great i. like no he was great. i'm not going to say anything else but i. don't want to make fun of anybody but.

um because i know acting's hard but it. was um 622 million they're fine what was. the budget you think 300. 400. i mean the budget had been [ __ ] i've. had to be like 200 i would say i would. say three plus. 185 that's without marketing or anything. right so it's got to be two-fifths level. yeah here's here's my argument with that. god that's so much [ __ ] money. yeah my argument with this if you saw. the first jurassic park right when you i. know it's a great movie the original. original original original right.

that scene where they're in the you know. i mean the tour van or bus or right yeah. and and you you see the cup and you see. the t-rex coming and it it builds that. suspense right suspense so when you. actually see the t-rex right it's like. oh my god this is so scary it scared me. i remember being like holy [ __ ] but. when you open up with just this gigantic. sea creature pulling down a [ __ ]. a ship. and they're flying around i mean it's. like there's no suspense there's no it's.

very it's just around right it's very. fantasy yeah there's just i mean and and. i always imagined when the dinosaurs. actually got into civilization that you. could just build that suspense and make. it scarier right right so you don't. reveal them as much right you i don't. know how you would do it but like. there's no magic in this movie there's. no magic yeah see that's what that. stinks yeah by the way speaking of. philadelphia over the the thing that we. just talked about yeah you see tom hanks. came out and said. they asked him if he could if he would.

make phil if like philadelphia could get. made today by him you know with him as a. star yeah and he said no and i and i. wouldn't and i shouldn't get that role. in this day and age yeah but what's so. [ __ ] you're like. how can you how can you say that you. delivered such a good performance yeah. the idea of acting is to take on that's. like saying like. so no. no straight person can ever play can. never play a gay person no gay gay. people made another one he died in the. first how would they justify no no he's. saying if you tried to. [Music]. he comes back to life like jesus. resurrects yeah you tried to he gets.

aids imagine that he gets aids twice. like you didn't [ __ ] protect yourself. the first time and also now nowadays you. have [ __ ] cocktails and stuff you. wouldn't die now what he's saying if you. try to make the movie today oh is that. what what do you mean he would they. asked him if you mean i don't understand. what you're asking me if you tried to. make philadelphia today why would he be. in it. you're saying he would be a gay actor. they were matt what he's saying is it. should be played by not a straight guy. but here he is is is not an is anyone to.

ask her for that yeah. i believe so did he so i don't think he. won but he didn't he was nominated right. yeah but also he advanced the. conversation so much because of that. movie uh everybody but here's here's. what's confusing to me is like i. understand the idea of being like gay. famous characters should be played by. gay actors today but if you found. someone that did it that you couldn't. find anybody else that was gay to do. that. why couldn't tom hanks do that the whole. idea of acting is to take on cheyenne. jackson who's cheyenne jackson he's a.

friend of mine he's a very talented. actor he could do it you think he's he. could have done philadelphia better than. tom hanks he's a great actor this is my. point just because he's gay doesn't mean. he's going to do a better performance. than jackson all right so then we should. then you know what yeah shame on tom. hanks it should have been cheyenne. jackson no no you're right now i can't. in our culture know. but what i'm asking you is this john. wayne played genghis khan right well i. was okay with that. yeah okay. but my point is that you know you just. no but i'm saying in this day and age so. on what last week if you can't find.

anybody good enough i got an argument. with my agent last week yeah. because they're i'm like i can't see the. project because i love the project right. it's a big project say it we'll beep it. no i'll tell you later go like this so. they can't no no no anyway just say what. it is so they're remaking something that. was big in the 80s. no way yeah. say every [ __ ] that's every movie. right so everything they're doing that. right yeah but it's a specific movie. that i was a huge fan of risky business.

dude let me just [ __ ] finish man no. no no. i want to guess. okay if you get it right i'll tell you. small wonder no. was that tv let me just finish maybe if. i give you more details then you will. guess that okay so basically robocop. no dude let me just give you the details. okay go ahead i'm not gonna kill you. right so i i i get the audition i look. at the sides right. and i read on it i know a little shop of. horrors. no. and i go oh i'm not going to read for. this.

because in the movie. where this character was. based on in in the 80s. it was a little person. and. right you think you can't play an lp. no i'm just saying i'm not one though of. all the actors i know. don't make fun of me i'm not yeah you. are you're saying that i'm small no. you're not yeah well you are yeah but i. don't look like a little person i'm well. i'm proportioned in a different way on. camera sometimes you do. what are you guessing willow.

no because they already did willow. they're doing willow and it's coming out. but that's that's exactly what it was. it's like them asking me to play that. little guy from willow. i don't know if i was holding him a. little guy was bad but i'm just saying. it's them asking me to do to read for. i'm not gonna get it first of all so. when i read it i'm like i'm not gonna. get this but why couldn't you do it. because the guy was that was in the. original movie was not only a little. person he was like 80 years old and he. had an english accent hey right you know. i needed a minute. there's just no way in my mind i just.

like i can't even i don't even know how. to approach this do your british accent. right now hello perfect you're hired i'd. put you in the movie immediately yeah. yeah so yeah it's like that type of a. role yeah that legendary yeah and i just. said. and i go i know what this is they're. going. because i know the director right kind. of you're right so they're like oh we'll. just see he you know he's. we'll just see but they're never going. to book me but that's the whole idea of. fantasy and film is that you okay here's. my point with you playing a little. person right that's a physical.

difference right that's why i get that. yeah that's like me not playing i'm not. gonna play a black guy yeah but in terms. of like tom hanks playing a gay person. if sexuality is in truth on a spectrum. like everybody wants to promote today. why couldn't tom hanks be able to. identify with what that might be like if. he has personal experience with it just. because he isn't. outright gay. i just don't think sexuality can be a. determining factor on who can play what. what about that's my point what about. dan which actually is the most. liberalistic view you can have because i. think you shouldn't you shouldn't corner.

someone and go you can only play this. because you don't identify as this well. that seems limited it's acting it's. called acting i get i agree with you but. daniel day lewis in uh my left foot. could he play that now. well they probably wouldn't let him no i. know not my point but do you think that. it was wrong for him to play that no. because he was incredible yeah but. that's what i'm saying it's like. if you spend time dedicating yourself to. something that's what acting literally. that's what literally it is otherwise. we're going towards a place when you can. only play it if you are exactly the.

thing yeah and then you're not really. playing anything are you you're just. you're not acting at all no then it's. not acting then it's called a. documentary then it's a docu-series. okay. recon this is magic in your errors guys. you know magical ears recon wireless. earbuds are a must-have for human beings. all those masters of multitasking who. needs to keep their hands free with. raycons they can stay entertained. listening to their favorite podcast or. music plus take phone calls with vivid. voice technology and hands-free look at.

this stuff man look at how cool this. little case is look at how tiny it is. and it has a little loop for you um this. is the new raycon case by the way the. other one was a different size i like. this one a little bit better it's sleek. and look at these little things they. just pop right in your little ear hole. yep and then they magnetically go back. in this case easy to travel with um the. sound quality is great i like these. things when i'm working out and also the. best part is these are fitness earbuds. um because you can uh you can work out. in these and you're gonna start working. out yeah yeah and they're priced just. right man they're like some of these. other ones are like you're so expensive. for no reason you get quality audio for.

half the price of other premium auto. brands they got eight hours of play time. and a 32 hour battery life with their. compact portable charging over 4 900. five-star reviews guys over 49 000. five-star reviews is very impressive. these are 49 000 that's what it said. yeah that's right that's fine yeah yeah. these are incredible man raycon go pick. these up uh at a great price right now. uh hey buy them for yourself or for. someone you love go to biorecon.com. bad friends to get 15 off your order. that's by raycon dot com slash bad.

friends for fifteen percent of your. order buy raycon dot com slash bad. friends if they said like you know we're. you know steven spielberg's gonna do. lincoln too and they want you to play. abraham lincoln no but after daniel. after danny d lewis would you do be. honest would you do it you know who i. would want to play in that movie john. wilkes booth i know but not because i'd. be so good now you're not offered that i. they should do a side movie like they.

did with the joker but with john wilkes. booth well you know what you know who i. saw in uh um. bring up the cast the top gun real fast. you knew who i saw he did a great job. but i thought sometimes in the movie. when i watch a movie i go. i could have. that could have been me um. out of the group of kids i'll keep going. show more out of the group of all the. new cadets yeah uh. one of them um was uh what's his name. son. um lewis pullman bill pullman's kid yeah. and he plays kind of like a sweet. endearing nerd in the movie he was good. in that yeah he was amazing yeah yeah.

but i looked in the when i was watching. the movie i did that thing where i. when where i turned and i was like. i could have done that could have been. me. like that one of all the roles i can't. be the hot guy in the beach throwing the. football no but pullman that one i could. have gone out for that yeah i know what. i thought we're going off of that john. ham's part you could have gone john hamm. yeah i think you think so yeah why do. you think so i thought i'm an authority. figure but they didn't want comedy they. wanted someone no i would mandarin and. strong i would be serious about it you. would yeah all right well then tell me. tell i'm maverick you're [ __ ] uh.

what's his call sign what's jon hamm's. call sign in the [ __ ] movie. you're i'm maverick and i'm coming in. and you're you're disciplining me for. one of the exercises that we just did. i'm not going to give it away i need the. line saw cyclone cyclone. i don't need the lines though give me a. line what do you mean listen you know. the movie you're disciplining me for all. right here we go yes you wanted to see. me sir. yes so. what was that all the shenanigans up. there. well that was the training exercise sir. you you're no longer.

a part of this program. can i tell you something yeah you're. killing it right now yeah. all right you got me kiddo. you're no longer a part of this program. sure with all due respect yes. i'm the top of all the top guns. you were. you know get out of my office. thank you sir that was really good. honestly i felt it for a second thanks. that was really it was my first try i. would have to work on it i would have to. work on it and maybe they would cgi on.

my face you know me make me white i. don't know. because i think being a little asian guy. would be a distraction like why is this. you know what i mean you just we gotta. get you baby we gotta kumail nanjiani. you we gotta get you jacked yeah i'm. thinking about it can we do that for. this show can we get you jacked for bad. friends before we go on tour we're. thinking about doing a bad friends tour. by the way before we go on bad friends. tour yeah will you get jacked as [ __ ] i. will can we get a bad friend's personal. trainer you know what i need though can. i get a like not a shake wake but like. some one that works like body blade.

i want something at home that i could do. when watching like netflix or something. what about a peloton i have one of those. i know so why don't you use it i gotta. go downstairs. i gotta go downstairs and walk down. those steps remember the body blade. let's get you a body but i i can't let's. get you a bodybuilder you just go like. this with it so you can be doing that. one yeah yeah i need to do something. like that yeah you just wobble it back. and forth look at that that's you that's. you that's me coaching your body yeah. what exercise can we get you to start. doing um truthfully there's one that i. just saw on late night at two in the.

morning watching tv. and it was like a little thing like it's. like a you sit down. and they're like little steps. what yeah it's like you put your feet on. little they've got little pedals they're. like little pedals. right so you're watching you know me. your favorite movie like you're watching. the boys the foot pedal exercises you're. just pedaling. so you're just paddling you're watching. so and it's just a little piece it's. just little pedals like it's a bike yeah. and old people do it like that and they. really like it. from the commercial they like it. do it we love it that's it right there.

yeah just one of these little foot. pedals yeah that guy and you just push. on it oh and you just pedal it's that. one. this machine will you do this under the. desk while we're doing better i think. i was thinking about that doing that too. maybe we should maybe we should both get. it and see if we can see who can do it. longer under the desk yeah i'm pretty. sure that works we're gonna get you on.

an exercise regimen i mean it yeah yeah. because i want you uh. i want you lean and fit for when we go. on tour. that's gonna be fun man. that's gonna be real fun can i show you. something guys. yeah of course. okay. is this is there's a movie that he made. yes. what movie. i just made a new movie he made a new. movie let's watch his trailer i'm. excited. parties and girls it's gonna be lit. later man okay.

going to colombia looks like i got the. lips and the brains of the family. i'm proud of you okay who are you. governor finn wants all detained. immigrants gone by election day. god i deported. zero tolerance. the d.a is suffering to drop charges if. he volunteers help care for senior.

citizens. at owl cove we truly appreciate you. being here to help out our seniors. how am i supposed to is it eric davis. my girl i suggest you say something you. know cause your skin i'm argentinian. if you stick to the program your time. here should be pretty fast and easy. you wait right here. sorry.

you really got away with the ladies. this is a horror movie getting out of. here what are you talking about you. trying to escape. [Music]. oh my god. it's okay.

i promise you you stick with the program. you're gonna leave this place more. mature. you may even gain a newfound. appreciation for life. miss phillips. you okay. mr phillips not breathing.

am i in here because i'm latino. or black. or both. wow. did you really produce that yeah. wow. what is it what angers you the most. is it directed by. jordan steel. kind of is it jordan peel ripoff is that. what it was what angers about it i think. it's a it's a brilliant film.

i think it's cool i think it's quite. number one i think everybody should. watch it no audition. yeah why didn't we get an audition for. this movie because it's like eric's in. it i mean i know a bunch of people in. there it's like we can't we can't get a. security guard we're all or. no honestly dude. there's no security guard or like a. couple of lines that we could. yeah no. let's be real let's be real let's talk. man. you're a producer you're doing movies. it's your second one we've seen yep the. other one was a big movie right huge. you're producing right. i'm asking you dude camera right because.

we've getting you a job here and we're. not asking for roles we're not asking. for offers we're asking for the. opportunity that's right right that's. right and it's not like we've never done. [ __ ] look at my [ __ ] imdb dude we. know how to do it we know how to do. stuff we know how to do stuff dude right. online so what's the deal uh where's. your pass ma'am. something like that there's a restricted. area yeah yeah um no puerto ricans. allowed. listen well you know who i would play oh. the the [ __ ] assistant to the. governor oh yeah yeah you'd be great we.

don't need you people around right right. yeah yeah and i'd be like you know what. i would be i just i work there at that. [ __ ] place right and i'm playing both. sides oh that's because i'm ethnic too. but i'm also love the whites right yeah. yeah i'm like that you know you're one. of us we're with derek chavin yeah do. you remember him you have cool stupid. asian partner yeah every photo that you. see that asian partner he has this. confused look. i like how you're like do you remember. derek chavez yeah you like his partner i. hate him polarizing yeah cause his look.

his partner looks always what going on. yeah he's lost yeah did he get in. trouble too that i don't know what's. going on no smart friend yeah he played. it like that i had no idea he went to. prison he did yeah but i believe they. even if derek sharman had his knee on. that asian guy's neck he would have the. same face what going on oh my god. anyway i would play that guy we didn't. get a role yeah we didn't get it i. wanted to be the ice agent you know i. wanted to be an ice agent yeah but it's. a great movie dude um so let me ask you. the premise though right yeah i don't. get it so if you're i knew george. lindberg jr i know him.

yeah jp i know why are these kids going. to the uh why are they being deported. because they seem like they're americans. for aiding and abating. uh. her uh their families. so their families are. illegals but they were these kids were. born there so there's a new rule where. even if you're born there what what do. you call that uh policy when you're from. barnard natural clicking on pictures of. women he wants to look at. we see what you're streaming that's even. funnier he scrolled down the list yeah.

and then he saw this girl catherine. hannah yeah hannah hannah yeah and he. clicked on her because he wanted to see. more about her yeah because she's not. like super famous so i was like oh. you don't have a shot. he does well with women i know he does. he does very i don't know i know one. girl that wants to [ __ ] him well how. about this. we've tried to make we've tried to have. um love matches on this show. and carlos is single and any of the. women out there. we'd like to put carlos up for what.

so i was at a comedy show a couple days. ago and so i was in the front right go. ahead and a lady walks up to me she goes. just to let you know i wasn't hitting on. doc so that girl that was at that show. that came to the side of the stage. oh yeah for our comedy store main room. show yeah that says she would hook up. with she adamantly she came to the store. specifically to tell you to tell me no. that she wasn't hitting up yeah but. didn't she say she's yeah but she was. trying to get a laugh and it came out. wrong uh yeah i mean and i go okay i'll.

rely that the doc will kill himself. yeah it seemed like she was hitting yeah. it seemed like it yeah call me a fool. but carlos is single. i'm trying to find this girl because she. emailed a bad friends account about doc. she's like i'm the girl you think wants. to [ __ ] doc that's her yeah that's who i. ran into the yeah she said she did email. you guys but i will say this we're not. trying to we're not hooking up doc with. [ __ ] anything ever again yeah because. of today you've been slipping so much. it's slipping fancy what's the other. link i sent you in that thing didn't i. send you another one.

oh look at this so what's this starts. playing immediately that's right go. ahead what is it. this got sent to me. [Music]. and how obviously is this andres. is that you andreas yes. yeah do you not know how good he is at. guitar. i don't know how people find this. [Music]. isn't that crazy.

tell me that's not insane do you know. did you know that he played guitar. that's not him yes it is. there's no way that's happened but that. honestly it's very very similar deposit. how many what is that 37 seconds is a. long time for you to not know yeah yeah. that was a long time no because. first of all it's pitch black you just. see hands that's right and barely yeah. but it's not you no but that shot right. there it looks a lot like fancy look at. pull your hair look at his hair is doing. that thing right now right now yeah. you're right you're right it is doing. that thing for a split second though i. went.

if that's him i'll respect him yeah oh. yeah but you don't still no i still. respect him i just respect him more than. the next time he's producing a movie. yeah why didn't you i'm really a little. shocked that we didn't get something in. your film the next one is just for you. guys what is it. it's your movie bottoms yeah of course. that's because we're producing [ __ ] you. he did did you see the tiger belly thing. you directed the korean drama. no no one gets a masterpiece is it. really yeah he did a korean drama. and hired actors but korean people to.

play tiger belly crew and they did a. sketch oh i heard about this i think. [ __ ] good you have to send it to me. yeah i'll send it to you any korean. actors i know no it was just like. but the guy that played gilbert was dead. on. you know what i mean the guy that played. me was so handsome it's so crazy. but he has the beanie and the you know. it's amazing they're at my house. great job that's how i know you have the. talent thank you. all right so doc told us that that he's. now he was what he was sleeping is that. what it was he said he was sleeping and.

he i asked him to do a video and he said. he'll do it later when he's feeling. better no. i was just tasting y'all. wow you sound bad wow. yeah i got this. man the stomach in my house this. headache man i tried to take a nap this. won't go away. well. what are you taking to help your stomach. got more wine. no. [ __ ] yeah.

why would you like. this ain't the time man no what i'm. saying is that what are you taking for. it because. right. grape drink. right right grape drink doesn't it. it's a sugary sugar. it's so sugary you know but i'm just. saying you know stop eating you know the. taquitos at 7-eleven maybe. yeah yeah well actually the whole foods.

food man. oh it was whole foods. yeah i was like [ __ ] i guess i don't. know what's been happening it's been a. couple of times just like this week. where i ate and i got sick doctor i'm. eating there i'm like what the [ __ ] yeah. hey doc are you just. what's up dog. hey. hey man just a question don't get mad at. me. after you poop. are you washing your hands. at the poop. are you washing your hands. oh of course of course because this.

sounds like a bacteria this sounds like. bacteria is getting from your poop to. your fingernails to your food. i have another question i have another. i think that's. doc. have you been eating other people's. [ __ ]. well you know man you love you do you do. love to eat ass right. you know groceries is part of the game. part of the segment part of the game. yeah.

they call you black man black pacman. yeah black pac-man maybe just ease up. let while you're sick ease up on the ass. he's up on the ass for just just a week. okay we don't do that just for y'all doc. we miss you dog we met hey. we miss you doc we're sorry that you're. sick bro. yeah thanks bro. i'm sorry man all right man get better. soon baby we miss you. oh miss y'all too. all right good bye bye. we lost doc that's it yeah he's dead can.

you believe he's dead he's dying he's. gone. he sounds [ __ ] awesome sounds. terrible. or it's the best acting we've ever seen. that could be that's really funny he's. that he's he's at disneyland right now. he's and he's in a bathroom he's like oh. barrel so sick yeah i mean. let me ask you something yeah if you did. find out that he was go doing something. he found something better to do like for. instance he's right now. next to he's at your mom's house he's on. there yeah or he's at like you know i. mean firing the kid or something yeah.

would you be mad you decided to do them. instead of us no god bless would he ever. do ours again. no. no that's the end of that that would be. that but if we found out that he was. lying to us and doing another show yeah. that's it that's good good good for you. move on move up but you wouldn't have. him back i'd kill his car and light his. apartment on fire right no i would i. would not have him back on the show he. would never perform live in l.a again. ever again la yeah southern california. yeah in the entire of course of course. nowhere nowhere nowhere yeah yeah he'd. have to be he'd have to kick rocks in. new mexico and get a couple gigs in. nevada but we love talking we hope he's.

good that being said whole foods whole. foods food yeah but i think he's saying. what he's saying is that he cuz whole. foods does have a cafeteria for. employees you know what else they have. what you know when you walk into whole. foods you guys have seen this they have. a bin that's discounted like meats and. stuff like that that's it says it'll say. right on it do not eat. it yeah but it will say it'll say like. almost almost um it says a sign it's. almost expired they're like almost gone. would you eat that. no. like if you were like on a budget what.

am i. then i wouldn't go to whole foods that's. true well who the [ __ ] is on a budget. going to hope don't go to whole foods. yeah you're on a budget you go to tj's. you're on a big budget you go to john's. not bonds you're on a big budget you go. to smart and final if you're really. struggling when you go to the 99-cent. store but i've seen guys that go because. i've been there they were serious. regulars on the show right i've eaten. our eggs now the money's running out. right but they they're used to the. lifestyle so they go to whole foods and. they might get that like you know my. two-day-old ground beef humble yourself. go to a [ __ ] store let's go to smart.

and final where it's cheaper that's true. because i used to eat that [ __ ] i used. to eat 99-cent store eggs i'm not. kidding i ate poultry. i mean uh yeah i did no do they have. [ __ ] eggs at the 99 cents yes they do. they have everything what kind of eggs. huh from what animal. i mean i'm not sure maybe a rodent of. some kind yeah yeah it was a gerbil egg. maybe i ate. well can you eat turtle eggs yeah you. sure can are they are they. they seem cheaper no they're more that's. delicious yeah that's a delicacy. no but i mean i've had you it's a mickey. yeah you open up the dozen and it's like. that's gerbil that's hamster oh they're.

different colors and sizes different. size and colors yeah some more purple in. the small snake eggs. you get what's the free-for-all yeah you. get what you get yeah and that's a good. scramble that's a good mix scramble yeah. i've eaten what you've eaten bad [ __ ]. when you were broke you ate bad [ __ ]. yeah but i but. yeah but i would go there were only. specific places i would go like i would. go to uh el pollo loco you could get. their bean rice and love. burrito el pollo loco because they were. like 99 cents how you can't go wrong. with bean rice and cheese well nothing.

goes bad there yeah yeah bean rice and. cheese you're fine so that's a 99 cents. i would go to like i would get a. breakfast at mcdonald's when i was poor. what i used to get it all the time i. still don't get it i still get it yeah i. still get it all the time i love it yeah. but um but i would eat but i would eat. i ate ramen one time for a month because. i had no money and i had to eat it every. single day for a month but i would only. eat it twice a day because more than tw. more than twice a day i get i would get. i started the smell of it maybe nauseous. yeah even now when i get like i i'll. sometimes like later and i go oh maybe.

i'll make this ramen. it hurts my neck there's so much salt. and it's so no like my neck is i have to. take my [ __ ] imaginary high blood. pressure medication your neck gets stiff. from eating ramen you can't even sip the. bowl like it really [ __ ] my body off. oh. there's so much like yeah msg probably. [ __ ] your body up no no no no no i. think they found out that it's not that. bad for you msg yeah it's not that bad i. know but the salt i don't think the salt. salt isn't bad for you. unless you have too much it's like.

anything it's like butter is bad it just. does something anyway. but you know what i do i'm guilty of. mac and cheese from craft craft is so. good velveeta first of all yeah if. you're gonna do it no really not velvet. is better than craft oh my god craft mac. and cheese is good but i like the. velveeta stuff i think that's it's just. do you use whole milk with it or 100. percent i get a cow i go to a farm yeah. i'll get whole milk home milk is the. best yeah anytime i tried alternative. milk i don't like it. the only one that i can [ __ ] with a.

little bit is oh oh a little bit. i've been so this is what happened. i'm glad you just said that. i'm not being real i'm so glad you said. that because something that's not even. funny i don't know why i'm saying it but. it's a revelation i had. so the other day. before jules went to the philippines. i've been eating cereals. cereal yeah you're eating cereal again. yeah what kind of so i've been eating. life cinnamon oh my. are you drinking the milk when it's over.

cinnamon milk yeah golden grahams whoa. hello i love golden [ __ ] right so. [ __ ] but i was getting massive diarrhea. because i'm lactose intolerant because i. was getting the vitamin d like. homogenized. it's already got homogenized homogeneous. and nice homogeneous i'm not gonna write. milk and i was having diarrhea there. then she's like just drink oat milk with. it yeah so i bought oat milk this is the. same. it's close it's clothes. here's the problem with those. alternative milks what they don't get as. cold as real milk do you know what i'm.

saying when you pour it in a thing it's. not as cold right it gets warmer faster. real milk stays colder faster stays. colder longer in fact i'm going to go to. the after this i'm going to go to the. brows i'm going to get buy more cereal. yeah. i want to come over and have a cereal. night can we have a cereal night where. are we which ones do you like cereal oh. my i mean there is no top five top five. of all time yeah like one like i once. here's what i don't like peanut butter. captain crunch is probably one of my. favorite i hate any captain crunch wow. you're wrong it [ __ ] i hate it because. it cuts up your mouth i like the texture.

i don't like anything i gotta get a. stronger mouth. is that what my problem is yeah life. cereal is genuinely one of my [ __ ]. favorites. uh coco crispies coco pebbles cocoa. peppers cocoa peppers corn pops love. corn flour i only think corn like i. don't like corn all almost all cereal is. made from corn i don't know i don't but. you know what i'm saying it's like yeah. that flavor that the corn pops raw fruit. loops i hate it you don't like fats no. wow i like the ones with the the double. side. what is that the wheaties but with one.

side is completely white i don't know. what that is. frosted fr oh frosted flakes not flakes. i love frosting frosted wheaties. the cubes. what is that called oh oh i love this uh. uh uh uh uh. uh not shredded wheat uh um the one size. white come on i know it's got cream on. it it's creamy it's cream it's a white. it's a cream i love it frosted mini. wheats frosted mini ones. frosted mini wheats frosted mini wheat i. love frosting [ __ ] things that is the. that's one of the best one of the best. and you know what sometimes i'll just.

i'll i'll eat the cream off one side and. throw away the wheat. sometimes i'll just eat the cream and. throw it through i don't have that kind. of like i love this green i love cream. it's not an artichoke i love cream half. of it okay anyway here's another thing. that i like here's what i don't like. though um i don't like rice krispies not. right right rice. krispies. what what's it rice rice krispie treats. not rice crispy is that a cereal right. rice krispies rice krispies cereal yeah. no yeah it is what do you mean.

you don't like rice krispies no i like. the cocoa one but i don't like that. white oh that one's okay to me what. about lucky charms oh no the original oh. i didn't know they had frosted ones yeah. they have frosted crispy yeah but the. original one because you you'd have to. put sugar on it yeah you would you'd. have to put sugar i would put two big. spoons full yeah yeah of course that's. why my mouth is made of [ __ ] metal. yeah but i don't like any of the ones. with the like that [ __ ] up. marshmallows that comes with like like. you don't like lucky chocolatey lucky. i don't like it you like that they're. magically delicious i know yeah my. people made that yeah yeah i mean i make.

dividends every time somebody buys a box. of that stuff. do you know they have to give to a red. hat every time we we get we get a nickel. every time you deserve eggs because you. don't get much in life. let me ask you this um. speaking in terms of oatmeal do you eat. oatmeal i eat overnight oats i like that. a lot. but do you when you have oatmeal do you. know you i don't know what over what's. overnight overnight oats is like uh is. it mushy. yeah it's pretty emotional it's the ones. that i have had those yeah pretty good. overnight oats yeah they're cold. sometimes they're they're always cold. they're always out of the fridge with. berries yeah yeah those are cool right.

but you don't do hot oatmeal sometimes. but pretty rarely because it's like. steel cut steel cut is the only one to. get yeah it's the only one again you. know where that comes from. ireland that's right you guys do good. stuff we do dynamite and [ __ ] steel. cut dynamite steel cut whisk uh uh uh. whiskey. bourbon um and um conor mcgregor the. best the best who's better and patty. patty you know patty yeah mma fighter. nra. ira ira. i was a big fan of the ira i love the.

ira not the nra i don't like that iran. yes you do. you're a big gun guy i love charleston. heston. all right so i like charles and heston. but all right so um from my cold dead. hands. that guy man rest in peace. but if you would have known. thank you for being a bad friend. yes. [Music].