The Producers' Biggest Mistake | Ep 138 | Bad Friends
hey bad friends I am gonna be performing. on New Year's Eve and New Year's Eve Eve. the 30th and the 31st at the Wilbur. Theater in Boston Massachusetts Boston. coming out and see me if you're in the. area come see me if you got plans on New. Year's Eve come out New Year's Eve Eve. 30th and 31st andrewsantino.com to get. the tickets Boston I can't wait to. celebrate New Year's Eve and Eve Eve. with you andrewsantino.com hey you guys. um obviously we have merch we got merch. it's back and these shirts have sold out. and we. made some more we made some more shirts.
for you guys we restocked these favorite. shirts This Is Me and Bobby uh close. talking we've talked about this before. that's me and Bobby just talking real. quick oh it says coffee mug that's how. it says the mugs baby you guys liked. them we sold out we made a couple of. more for you guys so you just go to. badfriendsmerch.com or look down in the. description below we'll have the link to. the shirts so go pick up some new merch. at badfriendsmerch.com. are bad friends who are these two idiots. [Music]. or something we're bad friends all rise.
okay. the bad friends court is now in session. honorable Judge Bobby Lee an honorable. Judge Andrew Santino presiding please be. seated. be seated I don't know be seated I'm not. Judo judge Lee judge Lee Edo judge Lido. and you're he's and to George Washington. Andrew George Washington. please be seated interesting interesting.
I'm just getting the care interesting. very good to be here. um welcome to. um this court case I'm very. I'm very excited and I'm going to do my. due diligence and my um oath. two of my the office. and I am going to really speculate and. analyze and I'm going to contemplate all. the ideas. and the weight of it all well really. good to be here I'm jejito what is your.
name judge George Washington I have. wooden teeth. that's all I know I don't know how would. he I don't know what he does what he. sounds like keep going wonderful to be. here. judging and presiding amongst this case. let's bring well the defendant what is. Ellen DeGeneres doing here. whoa I didn't know we're doing voices. she's the attorney for the man on trial.
Carlos Herrera please approach. interesting very good. is that a bomb. yeah a bulletproof vest in case. somebody decides to tattoo Unabomber. what the [ __ ] is going on here may I see. the paperwork put your hands on the. Bible. do you solemnly swear to tell the whole. truth all of the truth and nothing but. the truth so help you God I do are you.
Catholic yes God bless. are you sure you're Catholic yes I'm. Catholic from your hairline it looks. Jewish. I didn't say that okay did I say that. yeah the hairline seems. do you have anything to say for yourself. prior to starting any words for the. judges. um. it's just that you guys take empathy on. me and go lightly on me. death penalty next.
objection ah thank you we're in. California. I think you're gonna have to see I I. don't think you can do death penalty. this lawyer is good. thank you. for the education Scottsdale Community. she's got our College that's SCC right. fighting artichokes amazing okay Miss Mr. generous Mr generous yes your client is. accused of mouth [ __ ] Bobby's EX.
not guilty. well interesting because we have uh. footage footage video proof okay of your. dewy lips. may actually that it doesn't seem. can the court Define you're greasy. you're greasy. [Laughter]. can you handle chewy lips for me can I. handle it yeah I can I mean that's I'm. okay I'm not saying it but I can handle.
it okay. what is what is the what is your defense. my defense is uh if I think the cases. that uh Carlos is guilty and uh messing. around with kalila uh but yeah I thought. you were married. am I his lawyer am I high right now no. excuse me are you are you the prosecutor. or the defense attorney I'm defending my. client and saying he's not guilty in. that he can he can mouth [ __ ] whoever he.
wants oh oh I like. I like that that's like James Bond but. for [ __ ]. he has a license to Kill but license the. mouth [ __ ] yeah hi interesting may I see. that certificate. oh my certificate for well then he has a. license to mouth [ __ ] anybody correct uh. that's the case Mr generous please show. us the license.
I would like to get that license today. in court. we've registered she's filing for her. license I'm filing for a license. interesting file denied denied okay. because you know it's been a year that. he has been you know I mean you knew. this court date was going to happen to. you and today's the day you filed I. found out about this an hour ago. wonderful wow what an attorney. when did you graduate 2008 oh high.
school or college. I'm sorry Elementary School what's in. the briefcase what is in your office. bring out the good stuff. some documents should help her now let's. see in my briefcase is nothing like the. basis of this case. empty Hollow order this is a waste thank. you. wow wow interesting so that's your.
opening statement. and that uh Carlos should be able to uh. mouth [ __ ] whoever he wants um so no we. have here like evidence against the. acute do we have a prosecutor though. yeah who's that we are the prosecutor so. we. brought Carlos into the bathroom one. second. um we couldn't find an American I have. no idea why we didn't it's bad yeah it's. really bad but look we'll Deport him. when this is over I know but there's. there's an actual American that's the.
other prosecutor maybe can he be the one. does he even know American laws order. [ __ ] greasy I will control my client. I apologize thank you thank you. the problem with the other guy is he. doesn't speak English well. it's bad. the fat one listen to what he says go. ahead listen to him for a second I don't. do English good see oh It's just tough. to listen to it's difficult go on fancy.
boy. well I'm very disappointed on Carlos uh. because we brought him in the into the. bathrooms family. and he is still Bobby's girlfriend from. him and that's the reason they broke up. and we have hard evidence that that's. the case. and I want to present exhibit a to the. core right now but we'd love to see it. and this has started. a year ago. this is uh November 16th. 2021. your screen's not on so I don't.
know if we're gonna show it but yeah. man this this prosecution is slacking. real bad is that the prosecution is the. team behind this podcast. I really I believe that the TV was off. nothing's on maybe the funniest thing. I've ever seen. yes all right here we go here we go okay. let's see the evidence that you've. brought into the court Jesus so just. based on uh. well I don't know I'm not familiar with. this podcast but we have to the left of.
their um it seems like a foreigner in. the white it seems like an only fans. correct performer correct. is that a little girl oh wait a child to. the left is a little girl yeah child a. child the little one the middle one is a. um only fans only fans and then we have. a foreigner on top of what's that on the. ground who what seems that's not me so. well that was quick to quick to jump. well prosecutor who's the person on the. bottom on his back so kalala is on top.
of Carlos and then how do we know that's. Carlos. I mean I I honestly I really wouldn't be. able to identify how do we have proof. that that's current video. well let me go to exhibit V then. I'd like to motion to throw that out of. court while it's throwing this out. admissible because we have no idea. admissible. they might lose well a modulator oh here. we go oh no oh okay this happened in. Hawaii. December 21st 2021 got it what's.
Happening Here It seems as if there's a. fan taking a picture with kalila. that's Carlos no you know what I I do. identify the the I know the hat is. deceiving but if you look at that little. you know that little strap at the Hat. got it and above that region yeah. literally no hair I see that now yeah. that's incredible so that is that you Mr. Herrera. oh my lawyer asks answer for me. um we're not uh you're not.
cross-examining my witness right now so. we're just we're not cross-examining. we're just asking you as a lawyer is. that okay I was asking if you were. crossing just making sure first of all. we're the judge we can [ __ ] do. whatever anything we want yes your. honors. respect Mr generous okay thank you Mr. generous. Mr Herrera is that you in this photo I. don't recall the year after kovid if. that's 2021 we'll have to I I Need a.
Doctor based on the photograph that you. see is that you. yes okay ah very good by the way you. could have still stuck with don't recall. excuse me sorry so that is you sir and. that woman to your right is whom. to my right. um that's a camera to my right. no I don't want the attitude of the. attitude. take a second also what he doesn't. realize is uh it's my right in the.
picture and you're right in the in. physically your rights who is on your. physical right there that looks like a. Hawaiian girl that looks like Santa. Claus well okay I know I'm the judge and. I'm impartial but that is kalilah. because I dated her for 10 years oh yeah. I thought that was Santa Claus okay what. is uh what is kalila Claus seem to be. doing with her her left hand I believe. she is helping that guy in the green. shirt uh pull up his pants you pull up.
his pants yeah she's just doing it um. from a different angle well it's. interesting because the pants obviously. look like they're already on they're. already on I would like to say that we. can't see if there's a belt on or not. order order I've been a judge for 47. years never in my life I've had I've. seen such erroneous miscommunication of. misinformation this woman is cupping. your penis yes or no sir. no sir I respect the court I'm not. trying to get it it's a yes or no answer. no.
objection your honor hey go ahead Ellen. I would like to say that it is clear. that my client here has as he said had. suffered some memory damage due to coven. and it's very clear that she is she is. touching him in this picture he doesn't. even seem to be aware if we maybe saw a. little bit after this photo and how he. reacted it seems like he is a suffered. some sexual assault abuse and suffered. memory damage thank you I mean I can. accept that argument because dude. they're doing a really good great job.
and look at it right when she touches no. because that's right there on impact. yeah an impact right so we don't know. the reaction after that he could have. been like whoa right exactly yeah so. this is. you guys are doing a really terrible. evidence as far as right now goes he's. innocent he's innocent at this point at. this point I've seen nothing okay I'll. bring it see exhibitsy okay well that's. definitely not it's not Carlos that's. nothing that's not the gentleman yeah. that guy is.
that's it that is George Harrison yeah. that's George Harrison and that's Yoko. correct yeah so if John Lennon's here. right hey if John Lennon was here and he. was accusing George Harrison of you know. fine fine but now but they're both dead. yeah prosecution whom is this photo. claiming to be this is uh kalala and. Carlos on a live stream show. yeah I don't I've dated colada for 10. years that is not her that's definitely. Yoko no that is George Harrison any more.
evidence to present to us evidence for. us to shoot it out of the sky yeah. yeah interesting oh I don't know okay oh. my God all right is that a video or a. photo this is all photograph evidence. unfortunately we do agree that that is. Carlos could be. perhaps who the [ __ ] is on the bottom we. have no idea no idea well can I call a. witness no well who's who's the witness. the judge uh George Washington he's.
there oh sure she was watching I didn't. realize George Washington you are in the. photo interesting so yes that is not you. that's my brother that's your brother. yes that's my brother Tim Washington Tim. whoa that's Tim watch yeah that is team. Washington I can speak on behalf of my. brother okay he looks disgusting okay. correct he is disgusted by the behavior. Zoom down this is I'm gonna help the. prosecution yeah zoom in on the tattoo.
on the person on the ground's leg ankle. does that look familiar JoJo it does but. whom has a tattoo similar to that my. ex-girlfriend khalila you guys are doing. I'm doing all the [ __ ] work for you. guys this is the [ __ ] you should be. doing I know God damn it but that's why. I'm bringing you in I know you're back. he's the job you [ __ ] okay wait. wait JoJo Lee no what we see here is. Carlos perhaps on on a woman that might.
have a tattoo similar to your ex yes do. we know that that's her. well I mean it's you know it is possible. that somebody would also have that. tattoo easily easily what does the. tattoo say it says um Carlos. in the Philippine language which is. interesting do you have anything to say. for this yeah objection yeah I would. like to ask the date of this photo. please. the days this is the date of this photo. is by the way if these [ __ ] morons.
just did a video it would have proved. August it it's bad still shots August. 30th 2022. they took bad still photos. it's the worst evidence this genuinely. would be thrown out yeah the mistrial. you [ __ ] dude what's your last photo. that you guys have it better be good. better be [ __ ] this better be the one. this better be the sinking Stone that's. pretty good oh that's a pretty good. pretty damning yeah that seems damaged. that one's pretty guilty ten years I. mean I'm guilty I mean.
yeah I don't like the defense go ahead. may I ask the date of the breakup. she loves dates. um JoJo Lee do you remember. what's the date now October October 11th. georgito I would say July 1st July so. this was at least I mean August 30th. this was maybe even two months after the. breakup. wow too much after the backup yes this. is August 30th wow exactly interesting.
October 4th 20th but that's not what. he's you know October 14th he's been on. trial. for um cheating on me but that's amazing. don't do it right he's on trial for. kissing my girlfriend even after I broke. over there even though like him and I. are supposed to be Bros bros don't do. that Bros don't do that yeah Bros. I have respect for you we've known each. other for all this time you know I am. going to respect the fact that I'm not.
going to kiss your girlfriend what he. did there is objection ex-girlfriend my. ex-girlfriend what he did there was um. if you ask any guy that we know in. comedy or not that is a No-No and that's. a red flag no no and that that is a. friendship Destroyer right is it not no. but this guy piping up with no no it's. just it doesn't just click shut the [ __ ]. up you're fired you're [ __ ] fire we. got the trial. I'd like to bring some evidence for it.
leave that photo up please leave it up. that's important for the course so we. are hearing that Bros do not cheat on. each other right I would like to bring. up some evidence. of about time Bobby. yeah go ahead having. um some uh romantic times yeah with. people that aren't kalila yeah oh wow if.
we could um show the first evidence. please. and I mean that is a lot more than. anything we've seen today judging to. leave whom is this with you jokoy. correct yeah a man a man. yep it doesn't matter the question would. be this it doesn't matter man woman it. doesn't matter this would matter if. Carlos was [ __ ] jokoy at one point. yeah yeah I believe he has at some point.
Have you ever [ __ ] your court at any. point no okay or any kind of. relationship no okay if you say yes. Jesus. next photo good call Carlos. next photo what else do you got up there. oh well here is this damning one oh it's. your brother again first of all George. Washington. or that's Tim Washington George can I. tell you something yes Tim and you yes.
this is a very Mis this is a very. misleading this is out of context yeah. you needed ChapStick and my brother Tim. told me he had a little bit left on his. lip yeah you got a little bit of. chapstick from him because earlier my. breath smelled okay and he had one stick. it to come chapstick before that I'm. just gonna give you an example I'm just. kidding myself I'm just giving example. right this is how him and me and. [Laughter]. timel and he had already had one piece. of in his mouth and he split the gum.
with me and I stuck it in my mouth. objection so this is a ChapStick gum. exchange that was Jefferson can I remind. the court that also is this is this is. this what's the racial intent of the. faces behind us in the background. exactly we don't Rook all that. that seems that seems yeah that scene. that seems really racist what's the. intent there what is the intention. obviously that's Photoshop.
because that's no you went to a wife. that's an IHOP right and IHOPs don't. have the decor so what is the intent. there hmm. both of these both of you two both the. defense and the prosecution is really on. thin ice with us now. oh again with Tim. it's just a lot of this we can speed. again. I remember do you remember this attempt. so here's the deal Gemini well we travel.
together. when I travel together right we um we. sometimes want to watch movies but we. want to watch different movies so what. you don't see what you cropped out of. this photo is on both sides of us. is. I'm watching poor identity he's watching. minority minority important porn. identity Tim did tell me they did that. because we're not that we're looking at. it right and so we've all been there but.
why are you naked next photo next photo. people need to be naked photos Mr. generous people need to be naked here we. go so another one of you and Tim I told. you we got a lot of these. there we go. what is going on in this photo with Tim.
with my brother Tim I need to talk to my. brother. this is bad what is happening I'll tell. you what happened all right yeah what is. going on Jim his wife is Korean his wife. is Korean is it not yes that's true. right I came over for some eggs. yes I came over for some eggs right yeah. and so I walk in the front door and I. have no idea and your brother Tim why is. Tim have all that um the pillows always. prepared too for what is that where he. sleeps in the middle yes.
of his home so I walked in with the eggs. dropped the eggs oh it looks like you. dropped some eggs. right I get on my knees then his wife. took a picture took a photo objection. yes I know that rug this is this studio. that's whiskey Ginger rug hey hey hey. hey hey.
[Applause]. running mate Rick Caruso they're also. Brothers he has a whiskey Ginger.
next photo please next photo there's so. much more to talk about in that I've. seen nothing so far nothing also can I. remind the court that the judging okay. okay okay okay that by the way yeah that. could be kalila or that could be Carlos. that could be Carlos this is erroneous. yeah erroneous thrown out next photo. okay but if it is Carlos oh okay. [Laughter].
yeah yeah this is drug use definitely my. drug years. whom is that gentleman that judge either. Lee is kissing that actually looks like. George Washington. if you think about it an imitator of. myself yeah next photo next photo this. is all that's the last photo we have. some damaging evidence something that. cannot be denied okay okay so we hire. other than the photo right it's on the. screen. could you please button your shirt all.
the way up we're in the courtroom not at. a strip club thank you the behavior is. just disgusting thank you I appreciate. that I'm getting hot we're gonna get in. trouble you didn't disclose this so This. evidence just came in did you just hear. him he's like I'm getting hot he's so. gross. wait what do you guys are about to. excuse me. it's too damaging I didn't want to. disclose this but you guys forced me. okay this is so stupid this is so stupid. no.
Mr rosende speed up with the evidence. immediately otherwise this court is. going to be adjourned I heard a pi. what what rfpi oh he hired a pi a. private investigator okay I love it yeah. wow. this is what. evidence shows okay. imagine how bad of a court case this. would really be safe. person like Judge Judy this is so. [ __ ] bad but it's all that. [Music].
I got an idea. foreign. let's go through all them I mean yeah. serious no honest let's [ __ ] the judge. said wait a minute what the [ __ ] is [ __ ]. mrera Herrera what is happening as this. plays out let's describe what's really. going on oh. I do remember seeing Oh man.
oh my God. come on. oh Mr Herrera what what what. it's like they know the camera. no we had no idea are you arm wrestling. Mr Herrera and whom is winning oh oh go. back. one more. go back.
[Laughter]. my case rests continue the photographs. oh.
yeah they seem staged. to you on please. that's it that's all that's it yeah yeah. and when you look directly both into the. camera. actually got headshots yeah I told you. not to show that one. [Laughter]. [Music]. of the fact that fancy Vehicles.
four feet away. you even [ __ ] up this assignment. oh my God yeah they take a pictures of. it. [Laughter]. so you admit Mr Herrera that this is a. true you're on a date you're on a. private date and you caught the private. investigator no I want that scratch from. the record. oh I have tears in my [ __ ] eyes. Mister you know.
you are not guilty. that is one of the funniest I'm crying. that's one of the funniest things I've. ever seen in my life that you hired a. private investigator he's four feet away. Bluetooth Bluetooth I love Bluetooth. because I have Ed but and I um I need it. there's nothing wrong with it this is. It's there's number one nothing wrong. and if I'm gonna do it which I do.
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oh you do know it. yeah yeah wait how do you know it that's. not a line. but um I'm glad that we got Carlos off. trial by the way yeah that's nice. finally listen if I'll be honest with. you if anybody that I know was going to. want to date kalila I would let you do. it because she's not going to want to. [ __ ] you okay. yeah you know what I mean but it's like. even if she did it would be a big laugh. I'd enjoy it we could hang out yeah you. know and um.
play with the dogs together excuse me. play with the dogs play dogs with you. okay cool yeah you play dogs together I. would play with Bobby's dogs like if I. dated yeah if I dated not like my. players are gonna roleplay I wouldn't be. a [ __ ]. um Chihuahua what how'd you know I was. gonna say that what else could it be. you'd be and what is he what is he I was. gonna say Yorkshire Terrier which is. like the wiry hair I'm something like.
with wiry hair like a hairless cat yeah. Sphinx yeah what that's you Yorkshire. Terrier oh yeah that'd be me I love. those things are they cute yeah. Yorkshire Terriers oh my God. bro dude I was watching The Great. British Bake Off I've been watching it. and it's so funny because they were. talking about one of the couples and. taking a walk with their dog and we call. them wiener dogs you know dachshunds. yeah you know what they call them what. sausage dog oh yeah yeah yeah he's like.
he's walking with his boyfriend and. their sausage dog Ron yeah and they. named it the normal name it was so cute. why don't we say sausage why are [ __ ]. British Indians so good at [ __ ]. baking Oh weird what Indians. what how many there's one Indian woman. on this but in every I've seen every. single season from season with zero well. you gotta have one because they're in no. they always go to either win the [ __ ]. thing or they get to the final I mean. they're just so good at it Middle. Eastern people are good at it Middle. Eastern people are good yeah they're. good they know how to bake yeah she's. great I mean they're all great that girl.
the first girl he won it yeah one year. yeah that dude's the king look at him. look at him he knows it too yeah he's. like I'm a [ __ ] bacon King yeah he's. like an engineer or something and he's. Indian in England you know what do you. watch that show no you don't watch The. Great British Bake Off no I haven't it. it's so good it's great it's it's a it's. I I honestly think and I want to see. something crazy that in terms of because. I don't watch anything wholesome.
what are you talking about what do you. mean like I'm not a wholesome guy like. everything I watch like I saw like I. said Hellraiser earlier and I'll watch. stuff like horror movies or you know. some violence sometimes I'll watch like. a Marvel movie but like in general I. don't do like Disney or wholesome TV. like I've never seen. um Two and a Half Men is that a one yeah. that's one the guy with eight yeah. but my point is is that but this is the. I this is one of my favorite shows of. all time and what I like about it it.
makes me feel like I'm normal yeah like. oh I I do want to I think I long I think. I long dipping that oh my god do you. bake no I long to be like to wake up you. know I have this fantasy I can't believe. I'm saying this. I have this dream this reoccurring dream. and I've had it for a long time even. before I met kalila where I live in the. Midwest and I see green Rolling Hills. yeah where what state I don't know where. right right but there's not a lot of. houses you know I mean but like it's a.
white house with blue trim right yeah no. fans you just see green Rolling Hills. right and I'm laying in bed and I wake. up and it's like seven and I wake up to. the smell of. coffee the smell of coffee right I hear. Peter patter in the you know the little. pitter patter you know what I mean. animals it could be yeah I never get I. never leave. you sit in bed the whole time the whole. time your fantasy is pretty close to. reality no no but what happens in a. different location yeah yeah but what.
happens is I look out the window and. there's I see a body of a woman never. the face. right what does the body look like. what color lizzo. it's like literally yeah no like Ada. it's all skinny black man yeah yeah and. um you know those those clothes lines. yeah yeah This Woman's doing that and I. can hear her giggle because I look out. the window and she knows that I'm there. right. I'm just picturing you as the York the. little puppy the whole time.
you're describing like a dog's day yeah. yeah. you're the mind of a dog that's you yeah. yeah yeah maybe that's me but my point. is is that I just imagine her hanging up. all these clothes and then getting to. your underwear and just being like Oh my. God. switches to me in a car with kids I. don't ever see the kids but I'm going to. soccer practice I mean and there's all. these things that and I'm in this. Midwest town I have a normal life.
and then I wake up in Hollywood yeah and. then you know man you're better I kill. it yeah I definitely kill it that's your. second life in your mind. yeah but maybe it's happening in an. alternative Universe maybe but I also. when I look at British Bake Off there's. there's a tone to it. right a tone a tone a feeling that I. have of like oh this is this I could do. I could have done this no what no what.
do you mean to be a become a baker no. what the tone of like people not saying. [ __ ] every other word right people go. being encouraging yeah like you know it. wasn't good it was a little dry you know. you didn't the the. prove you didn't proof it long enough or. bake it long enough you know and um but. I like the flavors right like they're. positive if I did a baking show it'd be. like this sucks. great bad friend's Bake Off yeah but my.
point is there's just a feeling about it. I just a wholesomeness though you wish. you were another person. yeah I wish I was different a little bit. man because it's like um you're not. happy with what you are I'm happy with. what you are and some of these girls man. sometimes you piss me off but some of. these girls know they're like you know. they think that I'm like the devil or. something man. killer and could you destroy two. different things whatever coochie killer.
yeah. the Beast of the night you know. dry up you dry them out they call you. desert man you come around and they just. yeah no no. I don't think that's what he meant. that's not what I meant I think that's. exactly no no it Shivers in satisfaction. do a little smile on that too and pop.
your lips a little bit that's what I see. dude right. dog it's like. she she lures me in with. sexy DMS you know what I mean we're not. a badge not brass but like silhouettes. of her body this and that right and this. goes on for a long time brah you know so. I reciprocate or I reciprocated. reciprocate means you sent her something. back yeah but like funny photos I mean.
like a silhouette and how to do this. yeah with those ones did you know her or. was it just I didn't know her oh and you. sent her a picture back yeah and then. then. I don't want to tell you where but I fly. to go see her right this country. yeah okay. you think I flew to [ __ ] Moscow you. were in the Philippines two weeks ago no. okay as far as you'd think which is. halfway around the world yeah yeah. pretty far.
thest point of yeah yeah it's far yeah. right and then I um. you know we I go there and she I go. there to hook up but like she just. leaves right away we have a date we make. out a little bit she leaves and I make. all these plans to see her this and that. and then all of a sudden she just writes. me this thing like I'm done I don't want. to see you anymore but you're the one. that [ __ ] sent the thing so she got. what she needed though what a kiss from.
booby Lee yeah yeah but my point is is. that you know so and I I feel like I'm. at a point where I'm like. yeah it's not and I think I'm done it. makes me feel unwanted and ugly well you. put yourself out there it didn't work. the first time you got to keep trying. dating's hard that's what it is yeah I. think you want it to be a lot faster but. just take your time no I mean I'm I'm. seeing this other girl in L.A. right now that just leave me out no but. it's a Cry Me a River you're like this. one girl I flew to you yeah and there's.
40 other women I'm talking to right now. but here's what it's how many women are. on the on the on your dossier right now. I planted about 30 seats. and they have to grow and that's that's. my new Theory you plant the seeds and. you just wait it you water them. and some of them grow some of them don't. but just know what there might be a. water shortage you might get a couple of. weeds some of those things might not. Sprout exactly you might have to break. get a whole new Garden right in fact you. might have to plant different kinds of. seeds maybe seeds with dicks. [Laughter].
but my point is is that it's been. um a voyage for me. speaking of planting seeds do you miss. uh like do you long to have kids. I talked to like Paulie and he's like. getting older and he's like I wish I had. kids and well I've been pushing him to. have kids since he I met him yeah I. always thought that that would like. um anchor him yeah he's never gonna have. kids imagine that guy having kids he. dreams about it but do you dream about. that yeah I dream about it yeah yeah.
I I believe it's gonna happen for me I. think so you guys are lucky you can wait. so long you can too now kind of look at. Natasha just had uh didn't she have one. do they have two kids or one kid she has. one yeah that was a few years ago but. she was when she had it she was 40. yeah when you see howlies yeah do you. see them get treated uh differently on. the island. you're there enough do you see that they. that the local whites are yeah because.
they have they they do speak in Pigeon. hey buddy because they know how to speak. they do the pigeon and dude it's. interesting I so we had this kid on. tigerbelly and he's like a local guy. right and I literally it was. mind-boggling I literally went. so you you have Freddie Mercury's mouth. because what do you mean brother yeah. and I go. what is this your teeth protrude he goes. who's Freddie Mercury brother. and I started singing him so he. literally did not know how old was this.
man 26 years old now that might be a. little bit too young he might not know. but then I go have you heard of The. Beatles he goes no brother no come on. this is what I'm I am not [ __ ]. kidding what does this man do for a life. he's a social media star what yeah and. check this out. literally Hey Jude for him. no he had never heard it and he teared. up that's beautiful brother he's never. heard it boggled my mind and because.
Jules had never heard of The Beatles. well that's okay she's yeah but my point. is that there are people out there that. just don't know [ __ ]. yeah but that's crazy it's crazy to. think that you're an American he's an. American right and he doesn't know who. the [ __ ] Beatles it's in that. mind-boggling Blissful ignorance though. would it be nice to find the Beatles now. how crazy would that be to find them now. oh my God I know if you especially if. you're into music like you literally for. a year you're just you know I mean Abby. Road you know I mean like in yeah it's. kind of like this first time you got.
stoned right and you and then you you. try to replicate getting high the rest. of your life yeah and it never works out. that's all I do I know you do yeah you. chase it I got high 20 years ago yeah. I've been chasing it ever since don't. you want to get sober man I've been. sober with you no but now no how are you. out there man but things aren't bad. enough for me they're not bad so I don't. but emotionally are they bad no I think. I'm okay what are you using uh just weed. every day and sometimes I take Xanax if. I'm stressed out I'll take mushrooms. sometimes yeah like drink socially. usually don't have more than three you.
don't have control no we did we've done. we got high cut down a couple times. together yeah yeah never again. what we don't know one day at a time I. know but today no yeah keep the Habit. today the day no today that they know. today that they know yeah but honestly. do you want to put stuff away no oh then. [ __ ] yeah I feel fine it's fine do. you know why I got I'm sober because. today was a good example I wake up and. there's six guys in my backyard. okay and they're building things.
right there's polls fences these are. these contraptions. and they're crying you know they're just. people sawing [ __ ] like what the [ __ ]. he's like you wanted this. I go what is it they go we're building a. cat sanctuary. and I go I literally I go what. yeah it's gonna you know they told me. how much it's so expensive you ordered. the cats actually when I was high yep. when I was high I went I was just like I.
wanna Sanctuary oh my God you know what. I mean I should have been building you. for [ __ ] yeah yeah and they were like. really we don't yeah. because you could turn this into this. right so they're just building this. thing so you have that now at your house. they're still building it now. tell me how much it costs. be honest 25 Grand oh my [ __ ] god for. a cat sanctuary can I move in there. and it's like and then there's a. gigantic tree I go don't chop the tree. no because he's like no you told us to.
work around the tree. so they're building this thing it's it's. crazy. is that insane do you have cats no. I don't have any cats yeah but it's a. sanctuary it's a sanctuary if they ever. want one no I do have three cats if they. want a seek Asylum they're just passing. in the neighborhood they want to see. this island they can't and the reason. why I did that was because there's a we. have a litter box in the living room. what.
that's the reason no but I had built I. spent a bunch of money building a little. at the end of my the front end of my. house a little doorway into a white. Shack where I put this it's outside and. one of my cats don't like going out. there for some reason right so she. decides to pee anywhere in the living. room unless there's a litter box there. so she's peeing on this [ __ ] twenty. thousand dollar friend uh Italian couch. I got a couple years ago so piss on the.
couch yeah this Blood okay I throw on. that cat right down the hill yeah piss. blood right so I had to put a [ __ ]. out of stress or something so now I. guess when I was high I was just like. watching like British Bake Off High uh. you know I did I need a couch out here. maybe the cat was on their period not. peeing blood. yeah. anyway that's the reason why I'm sober.
because I make decisions like that you. know bad decisions are you up to making. bad decisions. um. sometimes I wake up and I don't remember. that I watched like three hours of. reality TV the night before like that's. not bad yeah it's not bad yeah yeah but. I'm not seeing blacking out. Consciousness is kind of weird it is a. little weird but that's like if I was. stressed out and I took half a Xanax but. I'm not like seeing escorts and doing. coke and I don't even want to do Coke. because of the fence I don't know. well I haven't seen one in a long time I. know but you know much about that world.
yeah I mean I try to teach you about the. world. and I'm not shamed I'm not ashamed you. want to get an escort now no I was just. curious to see how it works I would. never do it. never one day at a time yeah I I can. never say never I who knows what's gonna. happen in the world but my point is is. that maybe tomorrow no not tomorrow okay. no but I was just asking how does it. work and he tells me would you ever get. one. again would you get one again yeah I. haven't done it in so long that I just.
don't have the desire honestly I think. that because of only fans the escorts in. La aren't as hot anymore that all the. hot ones are making all like so much. money off the internet I have a question. I'm so glad you brought that up good for. them did you hear what happened with Ari. no no. no he loves us yeah what. are we allowed to say this on the show I. want to do it is it private business no. did it get robbed by it you hear me out. okay this actually happened okay.
where's my phone. because there's a photo I wanted to show. you. it's worth it no okay it's [ __ ] worth. it okay. he's dating like a porn star listen. no he is he told me I mean he told me. personally oh I know listen. listen and learn. so I'm on [ __ ] Instagram. and I see uh booty so I click on the. thing this other girl yeah and she I've. realized that she has the only fan so I. go to only fans right I subscribe was 31.
I don't know what it is right subscribe. to the only friends right and she has. sex videos on there right I start. jerking off to one of the six videos and. as I'm jerking off. I get this photo. oh yeah that's her and that's his penis. oh my God you you jacked off to Ari. Manis oh that's Ari's girl. it was fun though right very good. but my point it made me angry because.
it's like. who's funnier me or Ariana's. Bobby no just come on man okay. the level though is different his [ __ ]. is bigger than yours that's what it is. well and that'll always win. I'll send you a picture of him with the. girl that you were jerking off to that's. kind of tight and he told me that's my. penis because that's the only one only. one that she uses how did they know that. you were jerking off because I subscribe. she sees who subscribes her all right. right so my like you know my photo comes.
out and he knew too he knew right and. just the timing and then they sent me. this and they're both giggling and I'm. I'm subscribed so how many times have. you watched since then none I. unsubscribed that's the moment so I lost. 31 bucks which I think he owes me call. them up. tell him he owes you some money from. what happened yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah. or alcohol that's big money that's big. money yeah yeah.
hey Bobby how are you you owe me 31. bucks. one dollar yeah oh why because he said. yeah. what. well I don't think I owe you 31 if. anyone owes you 31 it's the person you. subscribe to. interesting but the person that used to. I don't think anyone does you subscribe. to an account you saw a girl you thought. she was a cutie you didn't do your.
research yeah I understand that but it's. like here's the deal right let's say I'm. watching I go watch I think I'm buying. tickets to The Little Mermaid right and. while I'm watching The Little Mermaid. a penis flies into the screen that's not. what I paid for. what do you think of the penis. it's pretty good. right. it's really good is it thick it's yes.
thank you I appreciate that you know. what I appreciate it I'm gonna give you. a 31 dollars yeah yeah really good. anyway thank you all right well you owe. me 31 bucks next time I see you okay. okay okay bye-bye. faster fall is officially here when the. new season comes a new routine but if. you're like me you get sick of the same. old same old day after day and luckily. factors ready to email delivery makes it. easy to switch things up with 30 plus. meal choices every single week 36 weekly. add-ons and an option to add protein to.
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the top and type in code back friends. because I always had a thing with him. what do you mean like a gay thing no. what oh that was always first of all if. there's anything it's between him and. Tim Washington yeah yeah yeah we've seen. we have that evidence okay right but. I've always had a little. um. oh there's always been kind of like a. tension between him and him and I what. do you mean like a competitive do you. see yourself in him and that's why no I. don't see myself in him now he sees.
himself in his girlfriend. that's exactly what it is yeah you you. hit it on that juice I see myself in his. girlfriend yeah but. um and you I'm happy for him she's. gorgeous so I have been linking up with. on dating apps with only fangirls but. obviously they say during the things. like I'm not going to give up my you. know. give up my profession which I wouldn't.
want a girl to go you know you got to. quit only fans for today I mean there's. no way I would do that I follow your. dreams my main point is that. it's not that I would be jealous I think. my thing is is that because my tools. right aren't as big as the tools that. she's using while she's working I feel. self-conscious about it don't I'm sure. you're I'm sure you'll fit the bill in. your own way it's like stand up you. can't compare yourself to the other. people you've got you've got people. offer a lot yeah and those sticks are.
insanely large like you can't compare. your tool to their like giant black. tools. like the porn star girls you can't. compare that I you know what I equated. to this. sometimes NFL Stars football players. will go home and play Madden yeah right. so they play the real thing at work yeah. and sometimes they do a little side. thing at home and they like them both. just the same they're both the same. different games no less real that's. right. laughs.
you got this Bobby that's true that's. true Paulie says he runs into you at the. Korean spa all the time and you run away. from him. maybe he could help you get some babes. no and the reason why I run into him I. run away from him is because he's. embarrassing. I'm with him that's embarrassing it's. the things he says out loud that I can't. be around oh like Chinese yeah they're. obviously he yeah he sings a song. Chinese people are the most beautiful. people in the world out loud is he wrong.
there's no Chinese people there's no. Koreans so what are you just saying his. preferred pronoun I know but it's like. imagine you're you don't know who he is. right you're an old Korean man I'm. business but don't weasel. [Laughter]. what's another word. yes.
you know my favorite. always good with Baldwin. yeah wow yeah I think they like them I. think yeah but also he touches them well. that they don't like no but they don't. say anything it's weird yeah it makes he. touches everybody so I imagine him does. he touch you no different probably not. an inappropriate no but he'll like like. pinch and stuff yeah yeah he's like a.
weird guy huh yeah yeah it sounds like. you think he's a weird guy I like him I. love I love him he's a brother I think. he's yeah he's great yeah but you guys. have a different relationship. yeah he he he discovered me. so um used to blame no yeah I owe him I. owe him and his family so [ __ ] much. because I was just a kid at La Jolla. imagine and they used to go down down. there. yeah that's where I started and they um. you know I was working as a doorman in.
La Jolla Polly goes in on Saturday. nights they I would always host one show. and I only had five minutes he saw me. perform and he walked up to me goes this. is 1996. he goes dude you're so weird out there. like oh yeah. open for me and that's it changes. everything that's awesome wow. he's a sweet man no just that time. period it was that time period there was. so many dreams and you had so many you.
know fantasies and like everything was. so exciting it all came true. I know. Whoa stop that's where I'm at now don't. ruin it but it doesn't it all came true. but it wasn't what I expected yeah there. was so much struggle. and and pain yeah but you're there now. so you know I still feel it shut up. you're emotionally uh you're getting. real emotional lately I think it's like. a new you're finding a new you now that. you're single I like it he's reflective.
I've been very reflective and um are you. a piece are you at peace. what does that mean are you at peace. yeah I know what it means but I'm trying. to think about what well then why'd you. [ __ ] ask me what it means when I ask. that I'm trying to think about the. answer oh well then take some more time. yeah yeah what do you mean by that no am. I at peace no like look here's something. that we we can address on the show. uh we had kalila fill in for you I want. to talk about this everybody uh.
everybody who watched it that had. something negative to say. um didn't understand that [ __ ] Vibe. because I think what you can communicate. it better but. the idea that people have are throwing. stones at kalila is wild because also. they'd be like way to go Santino like. like I had anything to do with it listen. I was in a jam I was out of town and and. this production that I was working on. they needed me for extra days I couldn't.
get back in town in time and she filled. in for me last minute she did a great. job and she did a great job at number. one number two on people to know that. she's always going to be a part of my. life and I love her like she's family. she is family I love her I love her so. [ __ ] much careful [ __ ] yeah yeah. right. she's she is the only person that I can. rely on 100 percent. she um we're still like children like we.
when we see each other it's just like. there's a connection and. same a family a family kind of VI no the. jokes are not going to work right now. when people attack her online right. um listen I feel great about a. relationship right it was a good run it. was a great run I don't feel resentment. I feel like it it only helped me on.
different levels you know emotionally. um my place in the world you know what I. want I mean she brought a lot of great. things out of me and I um. and whenever I see people say negative. things online about her it really breaks. my heart it's like you're attacking me. in a weird way well here's what's. interesting two things one I think. people forget that like we're all this. is like a family we're like a family. together yeah and obviously when we're. [ __ ] around and joking around with. storyline on the show that's half of the. fun of the show.
and the other thing is I think what's. [ __ ] about people that view a. relationship in one little Viewpoint. it's like when somebody retires from. playing a professional athlete. and all they're thinking about is the. one game that they played poorly is as. if that's going to accomplish their. entire career there was ups and downs. there was great things and bad things. and trades and blah blah and to me it's. like that's what that relationship was. to there was a lot of UPS there was. Downs there was learning curves there. was changes as people and you grew and. then when it was over.
it was still a good thing it helped both. of you in different ways and that's the. the mature thing that I will give you. got you a lot of credit for is that you. ju you you took what you. got from it on a positive note and the. negative stuff you let go away because. now you're both [ __ ] moving forward. in life yeah I think that's how the. [ __ ] mature way to look at all that. stuff which you did very well I also. wanna I like what you said about like. the family aspect of it man this is our.
we're all like you know I've heard a. couple of people go why are you opening. for Tom Segura this week I know you. called me and you said that people were. like saying that and I'm like yeah but. it's like I don't look it that way it's. like he's family yeah I'm gonna have fun. with him you know at his show. and that's how I see it it's like we you. know when we see each other you know on. the road or at the clubs or when we call. each other there really is a camaraderie. and a connection and um we'll I think. that's why. the East Coast and West Coast scene is.
different in the sense that we never had. this kind of connection now everyone. we're growing all together we bring this. little one in you know because we want. to help her because we see that she's. the Next Generation I mean this is how. it all works yeah yeah so what an. incredible show for the audience you and. Tom Segura yeah it's amazing it's an. insane yeah yeah yeah but I think that's. what people need to remember and keep in. mind as much fun as we want to have on. the show and we always do. yeah and people keep hitting me and Rudy. against each other and I just want to. say that she is my family now too I love.
that girl and it's not a war this is all. for fun and by the way when we play into. the war that's even the funny the. funnier thing is that's the whole point. of it that being said Carlos is still. well yeah on our [ __ ] list yeah yeah but. that that's just the way that that's the. way it's going to be I was proven not. guilty though that's true yeah no I was. there I was at I was on the trial my my. uh my brother was the judge but I do. have to say that I do love you man. and um I really do there's something. about you that like I just trust cool.
and um you know I love you know I went. to the Philippines with. Andreas oh my God and I you know there's. just a working relationship and a you. know and I want to get to know you. better but I feel like we grew up a. little bit closer no yeah what's wrong. with you man what I'm trying to [ __ ]. what is [ __ ] wrong with you I'm. trying to bond with you and you're like. with your moist Spanish lips and you're. like googly-eyed what right I just. [ __ ] take it in man I'm trying I. think people can't understand an.
amicable breakup I know in my life I've. seen so many people like even parents. dating people and break it and then you. just never talk to each other again yeah. so I think a lot of that outrage is like. from their personal experience so you. guys I think are setting a really cool. example of how two people can break up. but still move on and be friends and be. cool yeah people I know dudes are like. well we don't [ __ ] anymore so I'm not. seeing it's like that was your. relationship only [ __ ] only [ __ ]. yeah you know what I mean it's like no. it's about being with somebody and. intimate being intimate and sharing your.
dreams and your frustrations and your. fear your trauma and your fears and all. this stuff right and you're you develop. a friendship and a relationship like you. know I'm friends with Sarah Hyland still. because we had we only did it for a. couple years but I love that girl and we. she when bad things happen to me Sarah's. one of the first people to call me and. go are you okay people just want stuff. black and white yeah people want things. to be cut and dried this way or that way. and that's never been the case but it.
that you know also it's your [ __ ]. life it's my life it's your [ __ ] life. yeah and it's been a good one it's a. great one it's not over yet well we do. want to announce something. what if that was it well you're gonna. live yeah we found out that it's just. toe cancer yeah it's tokenso yeah uh I'm. glad that you're back for a heartbeat. we're both busy bees and so busy you're. going to New York to go film so in the. future if we do have other people.
feeling on the show that's because we're. both [ __ ] trying our best to bring. you guys episodes every [ __ ] week and. it's in November and December I've. cleared my I'm doing I'm doing Esther's. movie in November but then I'm in town. did she write a movie she co-wrote her. with Nick gooson she did oh the goose. the goose. great people can you say who's in it. yeah I know Haley Joel Osmond's in it oh. yeah wow yeah he's great yeah I think he. dropped out did he really so funny yeah. no I'm being serious the whole reason.
why I'm doing the movie no I think he's. back in actually do you think he still. sees dead people yes uh yeah maybe he's. older now though yeah. you lose the sense I think you would if. you saw them when you were young you. would lose them I played him in a golf. in a golf tournament for charity yeah. was he nice I beat him no he's very nice. he's a cool teams are very cool he. should do that movie part two yeah. but now he's still bits of Comedy what's.
the seven cents yeah do you know how. sometimes they have those people that. say they've been like sexually uh [ __ ]. in the middle of the night by. Poltergeist like have you ever seen this. do you know that you don't know do you. not know this there's people that have. accounts that they say they've woken up. and they're being [ __ ] by a ghost. I swear. I got real things they're called crazy. people no they're not dude this is oh. these are real people there's a 1-800. number for it really no it's just the. sexual but just you've been [ __ ] by a. ghost let's call that goat I was [ __ ]. by a ghost ghost right by ghost.
yeah look at this I got [ __ ] by a. ghost see I'm telling you there's people. that have been [ __ ] by a ghost wow. look it's on all caps like they wrote it. right I got [ __ ] by a ghost now would. it be scarier I'm gonna can I ask you a. question. let me ask you a question. if you were sexually assaulted right I. think you're gonna say if you were a. ghost no no I just wanna okay let's can. I just just say if I can handle it go. ahead okay. if it looked like Casper okay or it.
looked like a human kind of half ghost. what would you rather have oh God and. Casper's friendly yeah Casper it's just. cute I you know I don't think I would be. that mad that he's like oh I'm [ __ ]. you yeah yeah that type of thing yeah I. would be like that guy I would be like. I'm tripping this isn't real yeah. well then he not Casper it blows a. massive Village. and it just Fades away.
just like all the other men in my life. Well he kind of looks like him yeah he. does yeah he comes and he just kind of. comes all goes inside maybe it's him. yeah yeah well yeah but there's people. that have been [ __ ] by ghosts in the. middle of them he might be I might be. sperm yeah yeah oh that's not I don't. like that. yeah. the look is weird yeah his friends they. look like they're up to no good yeah. don't leave the door unlocked or what. are the what the green Blobby goes from. Ghostbusters yeah so it would have.
Slimer pumped you yeah I'd rather Casper. first Slimer though let's just see oh. he's scared. teeth yeah that's not he'd be good at. going down on you though yeah I don't. now let me ask you something. yeah that would be a little intrusive. yeah just a little bit yeah he looks. repulsive what about Bill Pullman in. Casper because he's kind of a hybrid. because Bill Pullman dies in the movie. Casper and he kind of looks half human. oh I know what you're saying I don't.
know what you're saying. I want the ghost from the movie Ghost. ooh the ghost from ghost ghost from. Ghost what does that mean. yeah Patrick Swayze I'll take him right. so he sees a penny in your [ __ ] Patrick. Swayze it doesn't even move a penny or. something around that table yeah yeah. that goes oh yeah yeah of course. yeah that's not a signature that's best. case scenario yeah that's not assault. it's not assault if he's hot that's true.
as a ghost yeah as a ghost as a ghost. interesting did you see. um. uh Bruce Willis sold his AI rights. do you know this so now you can make. movies he can make movies posthumously. Keanu Reeves has done that too I believe. he was the first one Keanu was how much. I don't know that I don't they didn't. say but you could look it up but he but. he. he wants to be able to still have his. likeness you know in film and television.
carry on because you know he's sick. yeah. that's incredible yeah look at it it's. uh reporter last week the star had sold. the rights to it to his face to a. Russian deep fake company called Deep. cake allowing the company to use a. digital twin for the actor who retired. in March following his diagnosis of. aphasia dude and some and they showed a. commercial they already made with him. yes it looks good [ __ ] unreal it's. unreal insane and how much would let me. ask you something it couldn't work for. the rest of your life yeah and we. wondered by your likeness what would you. charge.
God that's tough I know. it'd be like you'd have to I bet you he. equated he had an attorney and a someone. do analytic to find out how much money. he would have potentially made you know. in court they say there's not much money. you took away from my potential earnings. he could have made anything he has a. disease yeah that has to be in the. equation no no they say if this never. happened that's what what I would have. made for the rest of my remaining life. and that they do a literally they do the. math physics yeah but if you have a. disease and you know that you can't work. again yeah right that would still be in.
the equation so you'd be like there's no. way I could make what would you make in. this Heyday he made what 10 15 million. dollars a movie yeah he probably walked. with 100 million right at the end of his. at the end of his you know. so he'd probably make another 10 to 20. more million I don't even know. it earned he earned 20 million per year. from working films 55 million right so. into that 55 million two thousand yeah. he's probably worth 100 million now. right so. probably 5 million that's what you'd.
sell you for a movie no way it's way. more than that I bet for Me Oh I thought. for Bruce Willis how much for me how. much for me honestly like a male for the. rest of my life I really believe that. nine hundred thousand. net worth might be a quarter of a. billion but these things are always. [ __ ] yeah but maybe that is true I. don't know what would you sell yourself. for uh juice if I said today you're. never gonna be able to work again but.
we're gonna buy your likeness how much. today today this is it it's over today. that's the point today I'm making about. a hundred dollars of feature acts all. right so what are you selling your. likeness for we're gonna use you on. stage on screen on stage I'd say two. hundred dollars an appearance a year an. appearance no no this is a contract for. the rest of your rest of your life let's. do go yearly one some number oh yeah one. summer for the rest of your life yeah I. can't work a deal like every appearance. goes to my family no we're buying you. out man uh.
I will say. um. half a million deal good yeah we're. gonna I do whatever so much money on. that whatever you're worth and I'll cut. it in half we're gonna make so much. money on that yeah that's a bad deal. Carlos. for me. I mean I don't really go on stages or. anything Bingo yeah. so my AI likeness would more be like. inside Fancy's MacBook like to help them. on the show also helpful yeah so fancy.
says no. I think a cool 300 Grand. no deal no deal there's no way lower. yeah way lower 100 Grand No Deal. 10 grand deal. and that's a stretch. we really have to call it lawyers but. for right now yes that's insane that's. so mean we have to call our [ __ ]. lawyer yeah yeah for who who no George. I'm Googling it for Tim Washington.
I'm getting some work I got I went on. the road with Annie yeah yeah Kansas. City it was so fun. um and this weekend and the weekend. after I'm featuring for Anthony Jeselnik. hello I just found out uh. um Irvine and Oxnard I think those are. great shows amazing it might be this Pro. probably or after but I'm going to say. something to you right now and I can. feel this happening okay. when we do our tour.
I don't care who else you're on the. books with that's right this is what I. want to hear your keyboard's link. whoever all of it all of it and you're. doing no matter what we're doing you. cancel to do ours when I heard about the. store it's all I can it's literally all. I can think about 65 000 followers now. she's up to she's that's insane she's. moving yeah I still I won't let myself. believe the tour is happening because I. have no what did you start with your. instagram-wise 13. 000 yeah and you're at 65 now would you. think I'm at 13 total I did a little bit.
Yeah but is that you had 13 000 yeah and. now you're at 65 000. yeah how does that. feel. it feels great it took a little. adjustment there was a period of time. not gonna lie because it happened so. fast that I was just I felt like kind of. weird. um I don't know how to put it into words. quite yet but it I just felt like things. were changing really fast but then I. kind of grounded how many do you have. Carlos it's like nothing really changed. um 6 000 something. good. Bobby why'd your voice go up and [ __ ].
nervous. the followers aren't everything but I. don't think it's bad it's great I'm like. uh like a producer I'm like like I. shouldn't even have followers so I have. some that's cool yeah that's good yeah. oh good. so followers aren't everything but it's. in real life when people show up and. they know who I am and they like the. work and the show and you know so many. people came up to me last night and were. like it was so cool to see you I opened. the main room and they're like we saw. Santino really sucked Bobby wasn't there. but yeah I was in Hawaii he was on the.
flyer. I called them [ __ ] Monday morning I'm. not going to be there and I thought that. he would I don't know they already. printed can I tell you when I got to the. store I was working a lot so around. sickler came up and told me oh you're. opening the show great hey can you do me. a favor and just let the whole crowd. know that Bobby and Bert aren't going to. be here so you did that well they ended. up telling me right before I went on. stage that I didn't have to do that that. they didn't want me to do that that it's. comedy store policy because it always.
says lineup subject to change that like. it they notified everybody but I Was. preparing all these riffs and like what. I and I was gonna do it right at the top. because I didn't want to hand the show. over to George Perez like with uh yeah. sorry to disappoint you here's your. husband right so I was like planning all. this [ __ ] by day the show the show was. good though it was an arcare again just. she's the best I love her so funny dude. she. so funny she does the same thing that. Ingram does where she's able to pick. people out of the crowd at the same time. as running a bit and incorporate them.
with stuff she's so [ __ ] funny so. great she's our girl we love her love. her all right so look. the trial is adjourned we know what. happened with uh Carlos he was set free. by Bobby. I think we're all kind of set free now. by Bobby. and uh. I feel better yeah yeah I want to say. one last thing about bad friends. we're going to do this for a long time. I feel it I hope so no I do and I have.
to say you know you are probably one of. my best friends thank you probably. probably yeah probably it hurts but no. doesn't it how how because I physically. say you are one of my best friends you. are probably don't say probably I don't. need probably yeah just say you are one. of my best friends. that's so hard to say you are really I I. think I am the best friend just say I'm. one of your best friends out of the ten. yes. who are the other nine oh for who are. the other five who the other four. kalila Gene Gene's a good yeah probably.
four top four Gene kalila you me Eric. Griffin maybe Eric maybe me your brother. yeah he's yeah he's a family that's I. wouldn't come okay that's different yeah. am I your friend your sister. anyway thank you for being. he winked go ahead and do it thank you. for being a bad friend. [Music].
foreign. [Music].
