The Power of P Compels Bobby | Ep 207 | Bad Friends
you two are bad friends who are these. two idiots a white dude and an Asian. dude you two are. disgusting you two or something we're. bad friends it's back to the old days. it's the two you and I I have some. problems with you my friend I got some. problems with you my friend and my. problems with you is I love you too much. I love you more than I could ever love. anybody and it's getting scary you're in. my dreams you're in my thoughts you're. in my prayers you're in my Daydreams. you're in my mind look who came back.
Pete Johnny whatever your name is Pete. is back on the show let's give it up for. Pete coming back to the show than you. guys man so happy that Carlos has gone. and Pete you brought us Monster siiz. slim jym um and this isn't a sponsor. plug he just brought us beef jerky. sticks for some reason yeah no as a. present cuz I miss you guys and I a long. time so you want us to Die Fat where. were. you I just where were you Bobby has this. been busy where were you I I'm sorry man.
I did you need me you don't betray the. family you don't leave the clan you. don't leave the war that's not call each. other a clan that's not good for me yeah. least not I know last last time I said. that online people got real upset I'm. not in the clan I'm not in any Clan stop. tagging me in the clan we're in KK we're. in 2ks yeah only 2ks not three dude. we're just we don't have the balls to. get to the third we're clue Clan we're. not cluing we're not we're not cluing it. right now dude and I aren't Cluckers I.
have never I I've never clued anybody I. W clux but Pete where were you because. let me say. something you you know in my heart I. have a list of names that's in my heart. that lives in my family which is in my. heart and I'm telling you you're off. you're off the list now I'm off the list. what happened sounds like it and and no. but because I it got to the point where. I was like I don't even remember who. that guy is and when I came to this. building I'm really getting really sad. right now emotional um I go who what is.
that fat guy going doing in. here he's not. fat where's the thi guy where's the. thick guy go th guy actually Pete looks. in the best shape I think we've seen him. in yeah you look great I think you're. just a bigger Big Bone you're big boned. I I am good lifting weights people don't. have bigger. bones they do they actually. do you look good I saw your Borderlands. trailer shout out to the Borderlands. Traer that came out yeah I watched it.
well just a little snippet yeah it looks. good looks pretty good it looks like I. think the movie's going to be rad I. think it's I think you're going to be. very surprised by the reception of. Borderlands you think so I do it's a you. know why. why how big is your character there's. nothing like this you know it's so funny. that you do this me no him oh it's so. funny that you do this right now at this. time and in this age yeah the time of. our Liv in the Time of Our Lives when. we're feeling joy and we're Joy in in.
our own lives you have to put me down. yeah you do and you have to put me in. that fox hall and you get down in there. you [ __ ] rabbit no I just saw Andre. in a movie and he's like a protagonist. it's like so cool okay he's comparing us. you know what here's the deal I want to. I want to say something to you fancy I. saw you put up a picture of you with. Matt re the other night by the way night. and you did say I'm better looking. yeah I think you might be better looking. than Matt R you know how many you you're. laughing right now dude you know how.
many people direct message me is going. yeah yeah yeah how many beautiful women. too so it depends on the context and. where you where you see us no no no it's. beauty is subjective is what you're. trying to say I don't know what that. word means I'm when I'm there it is wow. drops El Roth Eli Roth put out a film. with Bobby Lee who have thought one. scene two no but I have no lines in the. other one yeah my friend Charles is in. town he's from England hello. hello hello hello Jolly.
oing exactly but anyway. um what you cackling that dog Jolly o. England bing bing. R the San Francisco. tree hello hello Bing. binging welcome to London. England over here we lock St and two SM. we do things a little bit differently. here in England way you know what we do.
differently what do we do Liam Liam Liam. what are we doing here yes Charles over. here England all right we do everything. wet anyway everything I think I'm losing. my accent I think it's I think his. mine's turning more Asian yeah yours. turn some for some. reason. every anyway have you been to Big Ben. have you bu have you seen the clock have. you ridden on the gems anyway have you.
visited one of our pubs you've got to go. get a shiper spy in a. pu yours is just a dog I know a dog with. Down Syndrome or something well no it's. an English. from from Essex it's a dog from Essex oh. it is anyway. um I don't even know what I was talking. about dude we went on Borderlands oh. yeah so so so Charles calls me and he. goes hello I go hello he I'm in town. from a couple weeks and I go well let's.
go have dinners well come to the shows. you came to the show we had dinner you. met himh and then um sure did and I'm. sitting there a beautiful bloke. beautiful broke just a thick handsome. delicious looking. dude I'm just going to do English talk. so um good looking dude I love black. guys accent I know dude if you're black. with a British accent yeah get my. panties all in a bunch man dude without.
him when I was in Budapest shooting it I. wouldn't not survived that dude because. he was your boy he was a guy that you. know you guys were going out all time. because you know dinners there's not a. lot of guys that you can hang out on. that movie you know like what other guys. are in at Kevin Hart saw him once who. else I saw him on when we're doing. scenes every once I would see him like. with because he was with like 10. guys yeah he's like Jesus he's like. Jesus so I had Burger King with Jam Lee. Curtis one day what did she.
order oh one of those because I was with. pen too from pen andella yeah pen. Gillette pendulette in it man was he. doing magic the whole time no didn't do. magic once no no no magic which sucks. yeah you're right like if you're hanging. out with Paul mcartney give. me yeah give me something hit a lick. once in a while yeah tell teller should. have been involved he' had done pick the. whole time so I and then well I told you. what happened at the river yeah but tell. me what Jamie Lee Curtis ordered at. Burger King the they have I don't know.
if they have it here but if there they. have an impossible Burger yeah I think. they do have it here yes so they she. they got impossible Burgers [ __ ] boo. boo boo boo boo you want to taste some. Budapest cows don't you that's where. you're in Budapest right yeah do you. want to taste budap you didn't eat meat. there did you me yeah I love the. Budapest cow you love Budapest cow I. love other animals so what did you. frankly Burger King a hamburger no I. think I tried to be impossible because. they were saying it's like the real. thing what we talk there he is look at.
that's a Budapest cow yeah and you know. what you can do with the. horns what can you do with the. horns oh hello hello hello hello hello. so um have you ever seen a Budapest. cow they're delicious yeah why am I. don't know what it is about that British. accent I'm doing but I really it's a guy. I see in my mind yeah you know what. movie I saw the other day that like I'm. like oh this could be the greatest movie. ever made sexy. Beast I've seen it so many times great.
movie right great movie and Sir um Ben. Kingsley is exceptional in that movie. you know what you know what movie he's. so good in that scares me and is so sad. the house of sand and fog oh yeah I saw. that too incredible so dark it's. beautiful great in the dictator but. anyway I have a couple scenes with them. but my point is. um yeah just a little plug here's the. deal you are very Hollywood I know the. joke on this show is but you have so. much more Hollywood stuff than me way. more. did I do a show the other night with.
Adam Sandler The Sandman yeah time did. he ask about you no did he ask about you. no did he ask about you yeah he made a. joke about you what'd he say. boy a Bobby up to that's a. joke is that a is that a joke he said. something yeah yeah yeah yeah did he. really though I don't think he did yeah. he why would he oh you guys are doing it. good there's no way he want do yeah nice. guy though what are we talking about oh. yeah let's go back.
to oh yeah the um people in the movie so. Charles I hung out with him all without. him um I would have been so bored him. and I went to Sushi together him and I. you know would do things together but he. you know the whole time I was like this. guy's a very sexy black English guy yeah. I really enjoy it he is a very sexy dude. what's his last name bring up a photo so. the fans can Swoon over him as well. Charles what in charge bar Charles bar I. for bar. baroto or t to TU to padilly square get.
off walk around for a little vet no no. that's not it is that some sort of. English writer that's him where fourth. picture fifth picture in right there. that's him yeah look at how good looking. that [ __ ] guy is Jesus Christ he's. shakaz Zulu he's shakaz Zulu that's. right he Shak I'm not saying that in a. racist way but like no he's there. they're doing a show they did a Showtime. show about Shak julu right and he's. shakaz Zulu say it right otherwise it.
does sound racist all right so let me. just get that over again yeah go ahead. so um he's he did a movie stop pointing. at. him more racist so anyway he's doing a. Showtime show called Shaka Zulu uhhuh. this is the problem with biopics and. stuff yeah me and you Morgan Freeman who. the [ __ ] could you and I play that's the. problem oh my God I could play Kim. Jong-un no you don't look like him even. with a lot of makeup you don't have. anything you don't have enough. similarities him you just don't watch.
him smile watch he doesn't smile so. you're already there it is. now that's actually kind of close now. that I see it again yeah um so I could. get do that I could also do well let me. say this if John Wayne can play him I. can play him John Wayne did a great job. genas Khan did a great job. if looks like gask Khan but up John. Wayne and gask Khan I don't think you're.
right. dude he looks exactly like him okay so. that d looks that's take a white dude on. Halloween dude that doesn't look. like you know he went to a really. highend look at that dude trick or treat. Pilgrim there's just no way dude now see. what oh yeah go to the little thing with. genas Khan on the the little statue yeah. right there right there he looks exactly. I you do he does look he looks exctly. like him too let me try to do that.
though that's pretty good that's really. good hello. hello yeah so I I could play him I'd. like to have sex with all of you ladies. you know what you I'm D. this katop by a pick [ __ ] you that's so. [ __ ] annoying dude I knew you were. going to go there something simple I. love how angry you got I just don't know. a lot of redheaded people in history. there's so many okay. Annie Little Orphan Annie I could play.
Ron Howard in his second in the second. coming of his life oh Ron Howard that's. right my bad or his daughter Bryce. Dallas Howard I could play her but you. could play that too I would I would. absolutely love to do a male rendition. of Annie with me with little curls in. them dude absolutely love I wanted to do. that too I would love to do that dude. it's a imagine me all the same people AR. but me it's a hot KN life you know me. dancing around oh my god with your. little Asian accent is a.
hard a hard life for us. treated yeah maybe B. away or maybe we were not. nearby and I [ __ ] up the lyrics a little. bit in the movie because that's what. they would do and you know who would be. uh what was the old [ __ ] Daddy Warbucks. yeah you know who daddy warbook would be. fancy V. 100% oh yeah you are bad little kids.
come over. here yeah yeah look at him come here. Annie give me the hug for the picture. yeah yeah come on an get close to Daddy. hbx that be amazing especially because. daddy box yeah well what um who the who. the what's her name the the the she was. the orphanage. lady who plays Hanan George that [ __ ]. nerd yeah George Hanigan he would and he. what's the song way I hate kids kids I.
hate them she sing a song right be him. all the time running around cabinets you. know so that look at her I think I would. have I would have loved that orphanage I. think you would have been I think she. would have had an attraction to. me you think cuz she gets drunk look at. how drunk she is Miss Hanigan would have. been all about the little Asian one yeah. well I'm the only male right right and. the and you're Asian toana your name is. toana yeah toana shishi toan shishi to.
yeah and she's like get over here to. shishi right come sit on Miss her's lap. yeah and then I would probably make her. go you you you like no no don't do it. what don't do it do what don't do it I. was going to say do you like Asian gummy. bears and she's like what are you. talking about right Ley favor.
okay right and she's go what let me try. it right and then I'm going go outou. okay uhuh why can't I do it I'm the. kid yeah it's a kid and an adult yeah. but she's just handan in the it's a. scenario you're right how is that a bad. thing now if I was Miss Hanigan I was. saying that to a little person it's you. know what it reminds me of reminds me. when they do those like porno ads for. like Peter and Lois Griffin online you. ever seen that where they like animate. May porn them it's insane Pete you know.
Pete's seen it. yeah hey Andrew you know when you get. cornered by that Aunt at a family. gathering and you feel like you have to. bend the truth you know the one who's. asking like when are you going to get. married I mean I'm already married why. are you asking me how come you to go to. college well because I'm stupid and for. her it's not really about to listen it's. not about listening or she's really. there to judge you yeah while you have. to grin and bear it with your family. member you shouldn't feel like that when. you're talking about your doctor that's. right right that's right so enter Zach.
do that's right cuz Zach do is a free. app and a website where you can search. and compare highly rated in network. doctors near you and instantly book. appointments with them online yeah once. you find the duck you want you can book. them immediately and more no more. waiting awkwardly on hold with a. receptionist oh God and these doctors. they have verified reviews okay it's not. one of these like phony baloney throw it. up Balon I don't like Bots actual real. patience when I moved into the new. neighborhood uh I needed a doctor cuz I.
didn't get to use my doctor anymore cuz. he was far far away and uh usually it. takes forever to find a new doctor but. the typical wait time to see a doctor. booked on Zach do is between 24 to 72. hours it's that fast you can even score. same day appointments if you're lucky go. to Zach do.com badri and download the. Zach do app for free then find and book. top rated doctors today that's Zach do. zo do.com badri. do.com Shopify you know guy I call you.
guy yeah you call me guy you know we. have an online business we use Shopify. and it's the best okay Shopify what is. it is the global Commerce platform that. helps you sell at every stage of your. business so basically uh we sell our. merch uh using Shopify they help us get. you those shirts that you love so very. much the beanies the hoodies whatever. we're pushing out um from the launch. your online shop stage to the first real. life store stage all the way to the did. we just hit a million order stage. Shopify is there is to help you grow I. mean whe whether you're selling scented.
soaps or offering outdoor outfits. Shopify helps you sell everywhere from. their all-in-one e-commerce platform to. their in-person POS system wherever and. whatever you're selling Shopify has got. you cover so we sell merch on this you. can sell whatever I don't care if it's. something that you make uh from your. home or if it's something that you're a. big Global platform you're selling. little tiny pieces of another machine. Shopify can help you do absolutely all. that sign up for a $1 per month trial. period at shopify.com badf friendsall.
lowercase that's go to shopify.com badri. now to grow your business no matter what. stage you're in shopify.com. I want to bring up something detrimental. to our family today it's an unfortunate. event Andreas assaulted someone in. public the other I heard about it there. was a fist fight at where were you. Chipotle your new name is Andrea. Zimmerman oh and that lines up new name. dude so what happed did explain what.
happened to Chipotle these two ladies. got into a fist fight just in front of. me and I were they out of barboa or. something what was going on over there. there was a door Dash bigger lady try. sorry what do you mean I'm making fun of. their Heritage what are you talking. about like like strong what do you mean. strong black people are strong now dude. I didn't even say how did you know they. were black right you say he assaulted a. black person no I said he just got he. assaulted someone at Chipotle no you. said earlier black no I didn't is she.
black just no she was oh [ __ ] I don't. know why that was in my head then my God. that's why I said Zimmerman I know I. know what's going on it was not a black. person she was Mexican and you assaulted. a Mexican I didn't assault anyone I was. just top a fist fight and I just got. punched in the face by he tried to break. up two girls in a fist fight and one of. them knocked the glasses off his little. [ __ ] ass head how funny is that oh my. God some Latino chick smoked this. [ __ ] she could tell you were Spanish. after you did yes wow yeah why did I.
think it was black I don't know I have. no idea man need I need help I need help. not type of person yeah he wouldn't do. that yeah yeah so and you got punch and. then did she say sorry no no he was. trying to stop the fight and they were. like get the [ __ ] out of here was it two. Mexicans give me the description here. the other one was black. mhm not the one he hit but there we go. though yeah I know okay yeah and who won. the fight really the black one. it was pretty even it was even oh really.
yeah the the black one was 19 which is. crazy how do you know she said how old. she was she said I'm 19 I'm 19 how did. that come out cuz the other one was like. a grown ass woman you know and she was. just beating on this 19yearold and the. 19-year-old girl said I'm 19 yeah I'm 19. wow were they arguing they're both. Postmates drivers no what was a worker a. Chipotle and the other one was a. postmate dver Oh wait what you didn't. say that so A woman that worked at. Chipotle yeah she was even the let me. guess the Mexican work the Poo no wow.
the tables of turn wow the drama this. girl is just cleaning the you know the. glass and then this posme person like. it's like Bridgton you know what I mean. you're. like you know white people oh the white. people aren't going to play in this. movie you know what I mean yeah so yeah. this is kind of nice to see there was a. black girl a Mexican girl and a Spanish. guy no whites involved in this crime. right finally yeah I feel good about. this mhm so wait she's cleaning the. glass the other person like you know.
just walks and like hits her as she she. just hit her. yeah and then there was a lot of like. slurt that's interesting dude wait a. minute but but she just punched her and. started calling her the NW for no reason. no so she brushed against her the other. guy said hey excuse me and then she went. bks wow punching and and scratching her. who said the n-w the black girl or the. Mexican girl the black girl called the. Mexican girl the n- word yes oh that's. kind of wow they balance little balance. no this is the equality that we.
wanted yeah this is equity and inclusion. everyone gets to be a racial slur were. there other people around yes okay so. I'm going to say something where you. [ __ ] up oh okay no one else stopped it. by the way no one else do you why do you. know why they didn't stop it I'm not. getting in the middle of that fight no. they want to watch it I know it's a free. fight free fight you don't stop a free. fight here at pay-per-view at Chipotle. we're watching two girls go at it yeah. yeah yeah. so you don't stop what what Pete any of.
them hot no no they Pete pervert Pete. sliding in sliding in dude hey were any. of them. hot hey was did you happen to jerk off. to it later Onre I that was relevant. don't you love street fights I love it. but let me tell you something Pete hot. women rarely are fighting and if they. are it's not at a Chipotle yeah okay. like coella or something yeah exactly. they're fight fighting over VIP. wristbands okay okay okay my boyfriend's. back there yeah yeah yeah I sucked his.
dick first yeah look we can all suck. whiz Khalifa's dick just get in. line and when do they when do they stop. playing when post Malong gets on stage. mhm that's when they stop fighting have. you been to CH COA Co I went let me say. it right yeah I got it ever been to. Coachella very good thank you I went to. like the fourth whatever that was early. on years and years and years ago when I. worked in the music industry and I was. doing desk work and they got us tickets. in back they got us VIP who was playing.
D. remember I love him he's good the [ __ ]. he good yeah I mean second album was the. best it was probably the best album he's. ever made yeah yeah uh who was playing. who was playing who was playing who was. playing I want to say the closing night. was The Killers oh wow I love that I. think so I think that's right do the. killers Coachella I think that's who it. was was I've had one nightmare. experience what at a CO at a Coachella.
yeah I didn't actually go inside what. year was that what what year was this. it's probably three or four years before. right before the pandemic click on the. image of the Coachella. image do you remember when I did this. can I just tell you what I okay 2009. 2009 that sounds about right so Kila wow. it was a long time ago goz can you get. us Coachella cuz I know CA. reps people from the festival and they. they have connections so I call C is.
there any you guys get fing backstage. and Matt was just like I mean you're. going to have to pay. some we'll give you a deal but we don't. just give out free you know what I mean. yeah they do they absolutely do they do. 100% so I paid for no reason uh yep okay. so anyway paid you're Bobby Lee I know. they can't get Bobby Lee a couple of. [ __ ] tickets yeah but no they wanted. backstage VIP everything I think there. was who do you think they give those to. Brad Pit Bobby Brad Pit's not [ __ ].
going over there yeah he's not going. he's too busy they give him to guys like. Bobby Lee see list celebrities that's. exactly who VIP I know. that's and when he says that dude and. when he says that there's no shame on my. part that's who we are we're cess. celebrities that's who VIP tickets are. for B listers don't want them cuz. they're they're a little above it and. a-listers me Andrew ver Troyer that. little guy from Webster you know what I. mean we're all back there dude me and. you and little people that's little. people oh yeah so anyway I I paid the.
thousands of dollars right and then the. day uh CL Mak some phone calls and she. go cuz I'm not going and she she comes. to me and she goes you have to go your. name is on the thing or whatever your. name is at the whe call and they won't. give it I go you think I'm going to. drive 2 hours 3 hours into the desert at. least with traffic with traffic and they. please so now I'm on the [ __ ] 10. driving drove all the way over there. went to The Wil Hall got the tickets.
drove back dude the power of [ __ ]. compels you is that is that in Lord of. the Rings they should put that in the. it's in the Bible I think it's in. Corinthians is in Corinthians power of. [ __ ] compels power the power of. [ __ ] it does compel you you drove to. the desert if I was bleeding out right. no no no desert you're dead yeah see. there it is I don't even know I don't. even hear their scenario you're dead the.
power of [ __ ] compels you the power of. [ __ ] compels you the power okay it's. amazing oh done drive to the desert to. turn around and drive. back well it was also Jesus money. compelled me because I'm like oh I'll. lose all the money that I paid like if. it was free you don't care it was more. about that poster you're right yeah cut. it out the things I've done for it it's. like I'll get you like as a kid remember. I beg my mom cuzz this guy um our Kimo. was wearing drar drar Noir yeah I.
smelled him he bullied me that guy yeah. anyway I'd go where is he now I have no. idea yeah. exactly thank you we took care of it. thank he he died he died I remember. going mom can we get get get your car. she puppy you don't you smell fight you. know I mean but I went and got it anyway. right and then 2 years later cuz I know. ladies like it mommy can I get cool. water cool water DAV off I dat it off. right I went and got cool water you wear.
a little curve for men do you ever we. yes every time a new one came out yeah. and then even even my 20 I was 25 I. would call my mom mommy could I get. whatever I might be abber cromi Woods I. used to wear that wow Polo I wore Polo. sport yeah and then it and then it got. funky the smells like you know M santel. 33 yeah you don't like it yeah what did. you start wearing fancy what did the. kids wear in Spain I think B was a big. one polo yeah yeah Polo what are the but.
that's cuz you're rich is that why do. rich kids wear Polo over there I no I. don't what are the Pok kids wear over. there dirt nothing Essence yeah Pete. what did you what did you smell like as. cool water you're a cool water water man. huh what do you wear now Pete nothing. yeah you have children if anyone wants. to give me a gift get me um Golden Goose. the tennis shoes I like has a smell. called vanice and they're always sold. out of it it's smells so good give me a. bottle well I'll tell you what we tried.
to buy you yesterday but it's sold out. and I'm [ __ ] pissed about it I tried. really hard you know I know what it is. what no the Apple glasses no they're. they're available Dam no we can get them. no we tried to buy you the Trump shoes I. tried super hard I actually went offline. and tried to get them the gold ones I I. I was thinking about getting one I. wanted you to get them they're sold out. they're [ __ ] I think be worth. something later they're they're worth. something now I know no but I did 45 My. Guy Look at that. Trump promoted $400 sneakers after 4.
$450 million penalty in fraud case hey. man you got to make it back somehow and. did it um sold out well he only made a. thousand pairs of the gold ones and then. the other ones are now go to Trump. sneakers.com I think is what the website. is or whatever can you get me some I. tried oh size n I'm trying to get you. some Trump sneakers if any fans out. there have the plug for the T for the te. sneaks we're looking for them big time. dude get Trump sneakers or something.
like that is the get Trump sneakers or. some [ __ ] I mean it's just they're so. cool looking even those digital cars he. was selling them a couple years ago I. was like I should have got some of those. I know what are we thinking look at that. sold out official president Trump. sneakers sold the [ __ ] out man damn dude. damn dude was a 400 times a thousand. it's not a lot of money not a lot of. money for him I mean it's just yeah. that's they're called Never Surrender. high. tops wow so dope so dope dude somebody.
called them Insurrection Els that's yeah. ins those are pretty dope dude yeah they. look like Air Jordan Ones they look like. the ones wow anyway I mean you I mean. honestly dude this guy you you can hate. him you can hate him you can hate him. you can hate him I don't you can you. hate him I don't hate him I don't know. him I don't know him either so how can. you hate him people hate him but those. are Sho those are great shoes yeah those. are great shoes man.
also I don't hate them as much what do. you. mean well there was a time in my life. where I wanted him dead why not dead but. I just he bothered me you know right and. then you realize that's a bad way to. think about yeah about people and then. um but in the last couple of years I've. grown to kind of like w you have to okay. so I know I know I know like so you ask.
your question why do people like him and. then when you dive into why that's just. the and then you kind of you can latch. on to some of those ideas yeah and then. change your perception a little bit he I. don't want to get into it because I. don't want to get cancelled but you know. well you're not going to you can you're. allowed to have an opinion yeah but he. doesn't you know Biden doesn't really um. I like him. too. you know didn't believe that for a. second yeah yeah I like him.
too you know what I did this morning de. on yeah oh man you know Trump wants to. come on our show show them the clip do. we have that. clip I can s this wait send it to Pete. honest honest question Trump actually. said he'd come on our show we have a. clip of it do you have it Onre I have it. but for real let me ask you something. and let be give me the real answer if he. want wanted to yes you would do it what.
would I have Trump on our. podcast yeah do I want a billion doll. deal from somebody I want to be Joe. Rogan and get $250 million deal yeah. because Joe didn't get Trump yet right I. don't think he's been on the show but. look at this I think he's funny um a. very funny [ __ ] and I know funny. people say I am one of the funniest but. he's funny too and if they ask me I. would do their podcast show bad friends. I think it's called. why not wow look at that funny China you.
can call me China man yeah he bet you. better believe he. can I of course I'd have him on the show. you know how much fun we would have with. that guy on the show I'm going to throw. you some names say yes or no sure OJ. Simpson of course you would of course I. mean I would make sure we we remove. Rudy's knives from the. studio yeah you're right I stumbled on. that joke but I got it that was reallyy. good really good joke thank you who else. so um oh Bill.
Cosby I don't think so there's a lot of. open beverages in the studio I wouldn't. drink anything I wouldn't no I don't. think I'd want him around oh you. wouldn't want him he's so [ __ ] creepy. he's creepy he creeps the [ __ ] out of me. all right good I'm just throwing names. out Woody. Allen. um I don't know dude you do look like a. little Asian girl I'm a little scared of. that yeah that's more of a threat for me. why no I know I'll just say I'll just. put the pigtails on. B I think I would spread my little legs. open love. it we cut a hole in the desk yeah just.
staring and drooling at your legs so so. no woody no no OJ Kevin spy no yes to OJ. oh yes OJ I think I said no to everybody. OJ no woody no no bill yeah um I said no. to everybody except Trump so far yeah. what can I just throw somewhere what did. you just say what who did you just. say who Kevin Spacey Kevin. spacy. great actor oh you [ __ ] you would no.
[ __ ] dude say that dude yeah um I mean I. I think the only reason I would be. hesitant towards it is because of the. amount of young men in here like Mone. that are on the oh right right you know. what I mean this kind of feels like a. bar yeah yeah you know what I mean. there's drinks in my office and Spacey. sees mcon in his little haircut oh right. well we okay yeah like young man help. help me get miked up for the show yeah. yeah I see M's like no the microphones.
are actually on the desk we don't do cat. he's like I'd like a Laval mic yeah yeah. why don't you tape one to my chest young. man. Putin no because I don't want to pay for. a translator oh that's right you know we. got to have some other guy who's not. really that's my biggest beef with. someone foreign would be tough what if. they're [ __ ]. lying oh through their language don't. you see that all the time and the. translator says something I'm like. that's probably not no no no they get. their we get our own translator oh. that's cool right so then he's lying.
wait what what is the accent he's that's. my Russian you know what our translator. is going to be lying no we'll get that's. English what we'll get our English. translator yeah. lying yeah oh that Po's lying through. his teeth. interesting but all on toast but all of. those I mentioned would would would be. interesting they would blow our [ __ ] up. though but in a bad way you know who we. won on the show is Gypsy Rose iied I so. I went to my didn't we ask to get her on. the show and she said no this [ __ ].
sucks and I said that I said it on um I. went I direct messag her on Instagram. [ __ ] ghosted me wow but she did she. leave you on scene or she didn't even. she didn't even look at it damn yeah. yeah I want Gypsy Rose man What's this. called again what's it called when you. do that to to somebody when you capture. that what her mother did was. called mun syndrome that's what Eminem. claimed he had with his mother right wow. isn't that true remember that he used to. talk about that in that. photo she looks like she could be.
related to you I know but she lookes a. little hot she looks a little hot photo. well it's okay to say that she's an of. age adult right how old is Gypsy Rose. you're saying it like it's not allowed. to be said or something no I didn't no I. isn't she 302 she's a grownup I know. yeah so she well why' you whisper it why. are you embarrassed about because you. know it when when you saw the. documentary you would never dream would. you that like well when she grows up you. well cuz they shave her head and all. that [ __ ] and give her those glasses.
yeah I mean she looks you know not I'm. going to get in trouble let's move on. but I I know what you're saying she it. she um she grew up she looks like a. grownup now why can't we say that that. she looks hot well it's not you allowed. to say she looks hot now she's 32 year. old she's a [ __ ] woman I know you can. say she looks good give me another photo. because I that one I don't. trust. yeah yeah well she's already married.
right isn't that her husband that guy in. the blue the big blue shirt oh really. yeah wait she married that. guy yeah and he's got Munch Housen. syndrome he has it too it's a cyclical. thing it's a different she married into. it she well yeah yeah yeah he's got. Munch. housing oh. munchkin. oh what's that.
y yeah he's a. foodie that's a f that's a joke sorry. that munch I got it now Jesus dude can I. how the whole [ __ ] Studio got it I. know I don't know. why but I just got the joke very funny I. thank you yeah yeah I'm trying why did. it take me so long to get that. joke Robin Hood you know that even if. you have a 401k for retirement you can. still have an IRA oh Robin Hood has the.
only Ira that gives you a 3% boost on. every dollar you contribute when you. subscribe to Robin Hood gold but get. this now through April 30th Robin Hood. is even boosting every single dollar you. transfer in from other retirement. accounts with a 3% match that's right no. cap on the 3% match Robin Hood gold gets. you the most for your retirement thanks. to their Ira with a 3% match this offer. is good through April 30th get started. at robinhood.com Boost subscription fees. apply and now for some legal info claim. as of q1 2024 validated by radius Global.
Market Research investing involves risk. including loss limitations applied to. IRAs and 401ks 3% match requires Robin. Hood gold for one year from the date of. first 3% match must keep Robin Hood Ira. for 5 years the 3% matching on transfers. is subject to specific terms and. conditions Robin Hood Ira available to. us customers in good standing Robinhood. Financial LLC member sic is a registered. broker dealer liquid de liquid to is my. favorite water I love it wow it is.
actually just delicious water uh and it. comes in these tall booy cans which I. love so very much I've been drinking. this Jazz for so long I'm happy that. they're a sponsor mango is my favorite. flavor keep sing that mango to me baby. but they also have sparkling uh they. have still they have this armless Palmer. this is iced tea and agave with vitamins. my favorite is the water flavored water. you like the water flavored water it's. the best kind I I also like it uh. because uh there's a very very very very. low amount of sugar in some of the. flavor flored ones and it's uh a great. alternative to drinking soda pop you can.
get free shipping liquid desk Mountain. Water flavored sparkling and iced tea. eight packs with Amazon Prime or grab a. can or a case at your local 7-Eleven. Target Walmart Whole Foods or on. instacart go to liquid.com friends to. check out all their healthy infinitely. recyclable Beverages and find your. closest. retailer that's liquid.com badri. liquid.com. bfri something about today is is uh you. know what it is I know what it is I know. what it is the rain [ __ ] up your sleep.
last night didn't it yeah it was too. much I know was it too much last night. 100% you know why I have this fear cuz. everyone does people that don't know at. home the roofs here in Los Angeles are. made of paper mâché yeah yeah [ __ ]. I'm afraid they're going to fall in. because they're not made well the first. year that we moved into this [ __ ]. shitty house our roof leaked the first. [ __ ] year we moved in the [ __ ]. living room collapsed wow yeah it sucked. dude it it was like un but here's what. get that you don't get. nuts yeah I'm not a big fan of nuts no.
no no what do you mean I have these. trees oh you sh it's sheds yeah with. these gigantic I don't know what they. are big beautiful nuts nuts right Brown. nuts big beautiful brown nut oh black. black nuts nuts so this tree is like I'm. I'm going [ __ ] all these big black nuts. it. raining it raining dog big beautiful. black nuts fall on your roof so not only. do I get the hard rain but I get. like this kind of right and it it just.
it's it's does it [ __ ] with the animals. yeah yeah my dog hates when Falls from. we have a tree above our house and when. it sheds she's always like the [ __ ] is. that like a branch will just hit the. roof and then she sneaks under the bed. and she's bummed the rest of the day and. I had a flooding remember I spent like. $10,000 on getting yeah in in the upper. hard wooden floors because of the. balcony I have a gigantic balcony and. it's and it floods. into my [ __ ] thing right so every 5. hours I go out there and to see if it's.
like because I I've cleared the filter. MH the drainage I mean but it's like I. just get paranoid cuz I don't want to. spend that much money it's insane any. kind of flooding with hardwood and. Floors is a nightmare probably with rugs. as well you're also in the Hills so you. could slide down I think about you all. the time what if you SL what if your. house starts to slide I'm not on the. Hills man come on when you say that. makes me S what I'm not Hill you're in. the Hills you're a Hills guy I'm a flat. I'm in the flats you're in the Hills.
it's I'm but you're 52 I'm 40 you're. more successful than me I belong down. with the people you're so much more. success you're above the other day I. went we were at The Comedy. Store remember that whole cord of people. went Andrew and they hugged you and I. walked by that was their that was that. was her cousin and and no that's what. reality is reality is you're a. beetle I just see this and you're Beach. Boy it it no you're Brian. Wilson no I'm and I'm.
Ringo okay that makes perfect sense yeah. Ringo Star more famous no huh he's more. famous Ringo than Brian Wilson yeah if. you saw Brian Wilson walking the street. and Ringo Star who would you be able to. I'd go up to Brian Wilson yeah but most. people don't know what Brian Wilson. looks like they know what Ringo looks. like yeah but that's only because of the. publication but Brian Wilson that's not. it's Tit for Tat I don't know what we're. doing right now look at him yeah can you. imagine that guy laid in bed for how. many years was it he just laid in a bed. yeah remember when he was like had a.
goreaphobia or whatever couldn't leave. the house he's still alive right you. know I don't know this is what's bad. about this show because we're going to. talk about it he's going to die in a. month oh that's right we do this all the. [ __ ] time and I hope how old is he 81. years old he's. 81 still alive [ __ ] what it's close. we're going to do it we're going to do. it I guarantee you he's going to pass. soon we just did it [ __ ] whenever we do. how many months though let's make a. betat all right um let's make a bet I'm. going to. go I'm going to go.
three oh my God why are we doing this I. don't want him to pass away I don't want. him to August August okay I get August. in August he's gone and God bless you. you what a talented man let's just do a. [ __ ] uh a death PCT right right now a. death pole no a death pact is when we. both do it. right we got to get rid of this Voodoo. well you know what we should do is you. we got to do a seance right now you know. what Paulie's trying to get me to do is. iasa with him Paulie's doing big iasa. trips. now bro last night he comes up to.
me Paulie yeah he goes dude I just the. iasa was like all right fine right and. then he started taking his hands and. twisting my nipples and he wouldn't let. go that's what they do after iasa so. that's what happens it's one of those. effects that's how you that's how you. really tune in to God they twist your. titties and but it hurts so bad oh yeah. he doesn't assault you huh he gives me. big tight hugs oh he does m but I'm also.
bigger than you guys do you know what I. mean like it's hard for you a little guy. hard to assault a bigger guy but since. he was raised with Asians yeah he was. raised by Asians by Asians whenever he. sees me he gets so excited and and I. have this like flight or fight kind of. response but I let him do it so funny to. hear you say that what FAL fright. because it's almost like a perfect. non-asian phrase. almost fright or fright what is sorry. fight or fright almost fight or.
fright did I say it that way it's like. you own a haunted house fright oright. come in tonight for fright or. fright really you're going to be scared. or get in a fish. fight fish FES will be broken you are on. today dude you know what you're on an. accent kick today dude I don't know why. yeah you're on a rhythm dude you know. why in the rain rings out my accents. what's amazing also this morning on the. radio on the uh I heard a preview for. some guy's new show that's where the.
British thing came from and it sounded. so funny it made me laugh. he's it was so thick it just made me. laugh what got in my mind once it sinks. in MA did you say. ma I said now you why I said what is it. wow I said wow you said ma wow wow do. they say that over there do they say ma. instead of wow mow oh mow and then some. guy comes out of the Hut. me. not you ma um yeah I don't know I I I.
thought I said uh wow but it's okay yeah. I I think you're reading anything with. me like I think I said fight or fright. pretty good but you're like fight or. fright it's fight or flight flight or. flight oh fight or oh that's why yeah. dude fight or flight I'm not making fun. of you oh you were you I [ __ ] it up oh. [ __ ] I am I am Asian oh [ __ ] you're. right I said fight or fright yeah. supposed to be flight flight yeah But I. mistake all right you're right oh [ __ ].
and maybe I did say ma which oh. my oh my God I got to wear this oh my. God I got to wear this I think my beanie. I need beanies which is interesting yeah. that you messed up fight or flight. because you always flight you never. fight you hate confrontation you much. rather flight I've been setting up I. know I've been setting boundaries tell. me a boundary you've made recently I. just you when people used to come talk. to me in a certain way you know and I. usually absorb it like you know people.
that we know friends of ours yeah comics. and stuff you know what I mean I go hey. man I don't like when people talk to me. like that oh I like this like people are. disrespecting you as yeah like who's. disrespected you. recently. you first of all I'm your best friend I. know but I did I I tried to set a. boundary with you we have boundaries we. have very I I don't want I don't want to. bring up anything but I'm just saying. that I said something and that and I. remember saying it going I'm glad I said. what did you say no I don't want to get. it what did you.
say I don't want I you're the one that. wait you're the one this is a trick dude. what did you say all right let's all. right. so sometimes when you make fun of tiger. belly MH it makes me mad a little bit. okay so I go hey come on man don't talk. about that like that okay and then you. kind of went okay and I respect that. yeah yeah and I and I don't and then you. did it like two times after that but but. but and I'll never do it again but my. point is that that's comedian Instinct. Instinct right right because you know.
how my heart where my heart Li I know. first of all let's clear the air yeah I. have a hard time telling you anything. you know how much I love wait about what. about tiger belly stuff no just in. general like I don't want to like you. call me every day I know we do I know. can I just let's just get this out of. the way then all right why you laughing. okay let's do it all right it's it's. because I love you so much and because I. love this podcast and I love what we. have going here yeah that a lot of times. I um. um I go I shouldn't say that because I. don't want to get a fight or this and.
that so I absorb it because I don't want. to ruffle any feathers I I don't I want. it to be smooth you can tell and I feel. like Simon and Garf funcle there was one. point where they got in a fight and all. of a sudden it was over right and I we. would never you and I never fight in. that way but I'm just saying that you. know I get um a little bit. more scared when it comes to um any kind. of confrontation with. you I said it yeah but you can tell me.
anything I know and I've never not been. supportive of you in our whole. friendship GTO but so I'm saying that's. not what I'm saying so what is it that. you can what I'm ditto that's not what. I'm the tiger belly stuff is a Crux of. it big. time it's not even that you do it as a. joke but it's like sometimes I just feel. like uh that's fine I don't want and you. you you haven't done it since then. that's fine and you know how much I love. kalila I understand that like you ask me. I just hate Gilbert I know Gilbert sucks.
I'm kidding but I mean there's just you. know mean Jesus but with you is the. hardest because I don't want to ruffle. any feathers but when I said that I was. just like I'm glad I said that you I'm. glad you said right so what I'm saying. is that but in in the world comedy world. and also I'm not like not as like scared. to like say things to people like you. know lately you've been letting go well. like the Matt r the other last night. what happened you left yeah you did a. show yeah and then it went up Liza then.
Matt R comes in right and then um. somebody was trying to get m r to go up. before me to bump you to bump me which. is fine but I I remember saying no like. yeah I think Josh Adam Myers goes hey. dude that R kind of good no he goes I'm. not going to do that to you yeah right. and I go okay thank you but then when. Matt was there I was just like you know. walk up to Mt I go you want to go before. me he goes I mean I have another spot I.
go I could go ahead when that happens. it's fine it's my decision you mean. sometimes you're at a club and they go. um yo. um T William I'm just made up a name. wants to go before you and he's going to. go up before you and then they tell you. what's going to happen I don't like that. right so now I can go no I can go no or. I can go make my own decision I'll. decide yeah yeah did Matt was on the. lineup was he on he was on the lineup. now so he was a Popin yeah and then he. also had another spot.
yeah what do you. mean don't do he doesn't get to do it no. here's the deal yeah this is an. incorrect move oh my God comedy is chess. this is a bad move it's not a bad move. what are you talking about I I love that. it doesn't matter here's why I love I. like the kid too it doesn't matter my my. point I'm making is if you had another. spot then you don't do a uh uh slide. into a what another show if you have. another time constraint I think he lied.
oh well that's even worse cuz in my head. I'm like what spot do you have it's 11: at night well then that's even worse but. I don't know I don't know so no so then. what we're saying is that's even worse. then you should say I'll go whenever. you've never done that I've lied I've. said to people oh no I got two spots I. got to go up right now I've never lied. about having another spot if I'm bumping. in on a show I'm not even I've never. bumped in on a show so case in point. this is literally the point I'm making. if you're going to bump in on a show you. can't have another engagement that. doesn't make sense you slide in on a. spot like Chappelle does it all right.
listen I I'm doing a Learning lesson for. people I'm a learner you're learning. right I'm a learner dude you and I just. don't bump we don't slide in fact how. guilty did I feel the other night there. was miscommunication on the show that we. were both on you literally said you're. not oh that was [ __ ] what you did. what was. [ __ ] that's another boundary I'm. going to set here we go right boundary. time okay oh do this no what's the. boundary don't you raise your voice [ __ ].
you you raise your voice now he's scared. now he cannot put the boundary up no I'm. going to put the boundary down man see. he's up what you did was sabotage how. did I sabotage don't do that with your. little eyes your little Chicago Italian. eyes let's not go let's not talk about. little [ __ ] eyes here all right all. right you know but you do this little. thing hey hey grass house gr don't don't. throw stones at a grass house all right. F fright F Fray okay. so so Friday night you were on the. lineup and I had to cancel stop let me.
can I. tell you know I hate when you do that. too when you roll your eyes because you. talking about it like you know you. didn't know what happened you Wen there. oh my God Friday night go ahead I just. roll my eyes to you see. it it's hard do with my head it's harder. to see when you do it yeah so um [ __ ]. you dude let me say something okay I I'm. I'm fine with your sabotage your little. Antics right oh god dude I'm I just said. I I love you imens I didn't sabotage I'm.
fine with it dude I had to cancel on. Friday what happened on Saturday let me. tell the story man you tell my story all. right so Friday I'm at The Comedy Store. right and they I oh Andrew is going to. be here this is great and then somebody. came up to me Andrew canceled Friday. night Friday night yeah Friday night I. don't care what the excuse is you have. every right to uh even if you didn't. feel like doing it you have every right. to cancel okay okay so s Saturday night. you're not on the lineup all right you. only canceled Friday night yeah they.
canceled Saturday on accident they don't. do that they did okay anyway do you want. proof of it I'll call Emily right now no. no no stop do you want me to call her no. yeah because you'll be wrong so they did. let me call Emily go. ahead yeah it was an accident she. thought I was canceling both spots but. she can't but I was only supposed to. cancel Friday yeah yeah anyway but okay. even if you're not now late they took. you off the line up which they did yeah. how would I know exactly yeah but how do.
you know what time you had what do you. mean you went up before me oh this is. exactly how I know because the booker. said I slid in MA in your spot because. you weren't there I thought you weren't. there so boom boom [ __ ] you [ __ ]. you how's that. boundary I always get this random number. from Road Island pick it up pick it up. pick it up pick it up. yeah. hello. [Music]. hello Robert.
who oh yes hi Robert actually this is. Lee and this call will be super quick. because it may not apply to you what the. [ __ ] is it we're calling. you hello Robert can you hear me yeah. [ __ ] that's how you do it that's how you. handle it for everybody at home that's. how you handle one of those calls. belligerent you don't do that that was. so good [ __ ] yeah [ __ ] you come [ __ ] I.
never pick it up yeah you got to come. [ __ ] yeah [ __ ] and he just hung up. scared Robert yeah yeah [ __ ]. yeah anyway Emily and that'll teach him. a lesson yeah no don't call her she'll. panic she will yeah dude she's she'll. freak out she slid in M for me um and. then I got there and I was like oh I. have a guest I have a guest here to see. I have two I had two guests to see me my. buddy Jake Lacy phenomenal actor who was.
in town doing the People's Choice Awards. who did I'm dying up here with me who. who was up for an Emmy for [ __ ] uh. White Lotus um who's on a new amazing. film and then Mark reier came to see. both of us sure okay and Mark can I ask. can I say something what you did yeah. I'm glad you brought this up because now. it's bringing me another thing that what. did I. do after your set you took all those. guys out of the room what s what are you. talking about when I got off stage all. your fancy friends were not in their. seats and they had not seen my.
set how what how do I have what do I. have to do with that you after you're. set I this is what I believe you did hey. guys let's go out in the patio and party. oh you know me I'm a big patio Party Guy. no but let's go talk or something I go. home every time after my set I leave. interesting because when I went to the. parking lot you were still there with. whom Polly yeah he cornered me. okay. this is our lives yeah this is what we.
think about we we have nothing we we. have nothing better to do you know what. I mean than all right can I give you. something let's move on all right I got. dry needled this. morning it's revolutionized my life pins. in your back I'm going to do it all the. time now pins in your back pins in my. butt and my back in my glute and my back. dry needling I think I'm going to do. this all the [ __ ] time it feels feel. great amazing here's what they do they. put the needle in there then he moves it. around until your muscles your muscle. like retracts and Twitches yeah cuz it's.
releasing and then he lets it sit. sometimes I go to with a guy and he puts. on U UV light on it kind of like extract. some of the [ __ ] yeah and I got to tell. you you guys ancient Chinese medicine so. good the best it's amazing it's [ __ ]. amazing is there ancient Korean medicine. by the way why are people. giggling what's going on surprise what. who is. it who's the surprise.
oh well well well well well well someone. doesn't look fatter than usual yeah EST. mom is your mom here your mom's here Mom. Mom oh my God sit down sit down sweetie. is your mom here for the premiere yeah. oh wow hi Mom come on in hi Mom come on. in ladies and gentlemen Esther and her. mom are here love your mom put on the. headphones mom have you been here this. whole time since the last time I saw you.
no no I went home for 5 days and you. came back had to go get my dad cuz he. can't travel by himself why is that cuz. he's 80 oh and he's a liar oh and he. lies to the TSA he's like I do have a. bomb in my. backpack do you um are you excited about. tonight's Premiere I am not you being. serious no it's just cuz you know when. your parents are there and it's like. embarrassing no cuz Bobby and I our. parents don't support us you you don't.
have to wear them if you don't want to. but it it's it's nice for sound maybe. you can hear how you sound in there and. then you can judge your own voice yeah. oh I probably won't like how I. sound like Judy Den I I just thre it. first of all it's Dame Judy d Sor my. yeah you have to say that no but we so. my mom was here two weeks ago and can. you pull your shirt up you're pulling it. down I'd rather it be up if you don't. mind she was here two weeks ago and we. have like all these security cameras at. our house to monitor my dad like. entering and leaving and we caught him.
in a lie about going to a. casino and so she had to fly back to get. him and bring him is this in Chicago do. he go to Rivers where'd he go he's. banned banned from Rivers y y why why. why why why is he Bann why is he Bann. he's banned from Rivers Casino he self. banned himself oh he didn't do anything. inappropriate and they kicked him out so. he had to drive to Pabi yeah you got to. go p yeah know it what do you mean we're. from Chicago yes what are you talking. about so you went to P patami which by.
the way uh don't don't no yeah don't I. can't do what well I was GNA make a joke. about you know little po you go ahead. show you did oh reservation dogss yeah. yeah yeah what's a joke say tell the. joke tell tell the joke you said no yeah. do it now anyway he's banned the. yeah you know you know you know Baby Gap. the clothes at Baby Gap yeah it's.
actually for the babies not you you know. you're not supposed to actually wear. just cuz you have a baby this is a skims. okay oh is that Kim Kardashians yeah wow. also you guys have been having my. literal my closest friend on your show. who what Greg is like one of my closest. friends of the comedy first of all he's. never mentioned that never mentioned. your name El he's not your closest he's. our closest friend we asked the goop. first of all his name is the goop the. goop yeah and we've asked the goop. multiple times who his closest homies.
are in the game and you didn't come up. once have you gone to see Wicked with. him once no but have you gone to an. Adele concert with him you know that. he's taking me to Madonna he's the only. person I've ever had common interests. with at The Comedy Store like every time. I see him he just he and I have so we. talk about Casey Musgraves Lady Gaga M. Cyrus like he's my closest friend in. comedy okay I mean I don't buy it I. don't buy it either I've never seen you. guys sounds it's very interesting you. know and you know I could play the same. game Brad Pitt's my closest friend. that's actually not funny that is true.
that is true yeah they've been hanging. out a lot s of similarities you were in. seven yeah taond do we love taond yeah. yeah yeah and we love Greece the Musical. the movie oh the musical yeah and actual. actual grease for the car love grease. yeah so let let me say something to you. how do you feel about the Billboards. around town with your face on it your. tongue your face let's ask your mom I. don't want to hear from her anymore how. do you feel about seeing your daughter. around town on billboards is that. amazing well I haven't actually seen one. but I've seen the pictures yeah pry.
cool pretend like look at the Billard oh. my gosh yeah that's amazing and by the. way just just above Sunset liquor look. at that you can't get better placement. than that baby I ask you a question why. did they. put zoom in on that photo yeah how did. you get all those sprinkles on your. tongue it's actually not and then go. toward the center of the poster the no. the yeah go down why is go. why is my name in. yellow I had nothing to do with that I.
don't make these decisions okay oh every. other name why one's white W I. understand yeah but Bill Burr is white. they could have put yellow in Reverse. anyway um it's a it's a great poster and. you know what's nice about it it's your. face it's my it is not my tongue though. no but what I'm saying is it looks like. you it's weird when I see posters for. films or television shows and it's like. that's not that they've airbrushed it so. much or they've done where you're like. that's not the person that I know oh so. this is your face it's nice that's a.
really good compliment that it looks. like me still it is you what do you mean. what's not you about that they didn't. they you're just wearing makeup they. didn't do anything to you thank you why. you did they do stuff and I just they. photoshop you yeah did they photosh they. have to photoshop everyone like a little. bit well they can't look like you you. know what I mean they can't be you she. didn't get all your jeans. huh what are you talking about I mean. the smile beautiful not her mother yes. she she's stunning your mom thank you. it's kind of a bummer yeah she took.
after her dad yeah oh really so what. does the dad look like a Jewish man okay. I see I see apparently the apple does. fall pretty far away from the tree. sometimes so um have you seen the movie. yet Esther uh I have I well I was. involved in editing and stuff I haven't. watched I'm going to watch it tonight. though at the premiere I'm not no I'm. going but I'm not watching it really I'm. leaving I actually was considering that. too cuz it is a little stressful to be. in a room full of the move is to leave. I'm leaving I I left the last bunch of.
premieres I've I let my agent was with. me last time and he was like after we. say hi just go inside and then we leave. and I was like is that a thing he's like. yeah what do you mean we'll go get sushi. oh okay he's like you don't want the. anxiety of being in the room I was like. I don't yeah it is it does feel oh my. God scary and if you're comfortable with. that feeling of being in that room. you're a lunatic this is validating me. right now so much thank you it's it's at. the man Chinese.
yeah is the man. Chinese man's Chinese the oh what' I say. is is the man Chinese is the man Chinese. yeah yeah ask me a guy question the man. Chinese yeah it is answer okay it is so. it's it's a big theater right yeah yeah. it's a decent my fear is that it's going. to be half full no shut up Bobby no. because when I did but even if is that. doesn't scare me well who cares yeah no. because when I did I went I went to the. get out Premiere.
there okay okay all right anyway well. why are you doing that why are you. pitting this against get. out both of them are directed by strong. black men that's right so Nicholas is. black his butt yeah you're obsessed with. his butt I know I'm I'm obsessed with. Nicholas G's butt he brings it up a lot. have you seen his butt before. noit wait in what world when I see his. butt if you see it it's unbelievable. it's so puffy he's got a nice tush. Brazilian wow yeah yeah so how long you.
in Los Angeles for uh we actually leave. tomorrow morning so Dad is here but. where is he in the hotel no no he's at. my house he doesn't he didn't want to. come to any of the things that we had. going on except the premiere oh cool. what else did you do today uh oh we I. had a doctor's appointment and then I. got there and my doct they're like the. doctor had to leave so I didn't see my. doctor mhu that's like his movie. premiere is when you get into his office. he's like I can't stay around for this I. got to get out of here I don't want to.
go through with this [ __ ] she had an. emergency delivery oh someone was. sliding out y yeah and is everything. okay with your belly I I I know how you. say it you know what I mean I don't it. doesn't feel good that sounded right. yeah yeah is is it a boy it's a girl why. is that your guess uh cuz you kind of. have masculine energy so I feel like. it's. no it's a girl we know and we I think we. said that you talked about the name but. you said you wouldn't tell Bobby no I.
remember that yeah what's the name no. she said she wouldn't tell I can't say. that tell me the name no Dave said I. can't to me no specifically yeah Dave. King said specifically I can't know. that's what he said tell me the [ __ ]. name I'm sorry Mom tell me the [ __ ]. name right now I'm [ __ ] tired of this. [ __ ] I've known you for 20 [ __ ] years. tell the [ __ ] name sorry. Mom the only person who knows the name. is my mom mom and she hates it and how. about this you really hate you really. hate the name seriously we'll bleep it.
out oh wow we'll bleep it out say it. cover your mouth and say it yeah I'm. sorry she told me oh really oh no you. hate it because it's a is no I mean you. don't like it be honest yeah it's not my. first. choice what it's I think it's one of. those like Levi or something oh no I. wish it was wow Esther please tell us. and we'll bleep it out I promise if you. promise to bleep it out I will tell you. guys and you can't tell anyone this is.
amazing. amazing hold on there's only one person. in the room we can't trust Mone go. outside mone's got to go outside because. you know he'll tell somebody he's a. yapper get out there I Nick make sure. the door closes cuz he's a yapper yeah. yeah by the way hi Pete I know your wife. is pregnant how beautiful Pete congrats. how how many weeks is she I can't. believe I just kicked that guy out six. months oh my God yeah get him let him in. here here it's okay I was just kid I was. just kidding give me the name give me. the name okay wait cover your mouth. though oh okay you chose for the camera.
so they can't see cuz you have to go. ahead what is it you have to believe it. yes and we all have to have an honest. reaction okay and just know that most. people don't like it so I'm okay stop. setting it up just do it most people. hate it just do it okay so it's a girl. that's important close your eyes. everyone close your eyes hands up it's. important to remember it's a girl got it. and the last name is very integral to. the storyline here wait a minute your. your last name no King King King right. got it that's very important got it got. it can we guess no just let her do it.
okay the baby name is oh wait hold on. let's. guess Bobby King cuz the king is Crown. Crown king crown king crown the burger. crown the king oh yeah Burger King could. be named Burger yeah yeah Crown Royal. king oh very good oh wow she should. might she might need to fill in this. chair sometimes yeah she's better than. Rudy uh you Nat Cole no Nat Cole king. that's wrong but I Nat Cole King Dr. Martin Luther yeah yeah it's the kids.
named Dr Martin Luther do you guys have. a guess what do you guess Pete come on. Pete what do you think something. King Rat King is it. theovon Tiger Tiger King Tiger K good I. also want to say that. Dave P he was the first one who pitched. it and has since gone back on it but I'm. like heels in the ground where so you're. all in no matter what yeah wow okay go. ahead here we go he pitched it for a boy.
oh eyes cled hands up eyes closed all. right hear it naturally react cover your. mouth cover your mouth okay go ahead. yeah King. [Music]. Oh Oh I thought everyone's look at me. hey look at me I'm absorbing. it what. yeah you like it or not it's really. bad it's it's embarrassing not just.
embarrassing I've never heard my why. would you do that to that poor kid we. love it that's a great name my God. original oh yeah wait so you don't like. it I actually I got to tell you I'm not. pandering I kind of like it it's so cool. I think it's cool I think it's pretty. cool I guess and it's cute you guess no. it's because I've never imagine meeting. a woman I'm not going to say the name. again but meeting a woman with that name. with that name I'd be like oh but the.
only are you a. sniper yeah yeah the only thing is that. it's a really kind of a weird name for. like a the child of me and Dave you know. like cuz what would it be what would you. want to be called. anxiety she's just going to be very I. think you know Jewish and small so what. would you want her to be named then what. would be a better Jewish name it's it's. a gender neutral name but I like but I.
think in school everybody's going to. assume it's a. boy you know anywhere she goes they're. going to think it's a boy you told me. the name a while ago was going to be. schmalz said I that's what she said. schmalz King schaltz schmalz King and. honestly at some point could open up a. restaurant schal King sounds like a. great spot I just I've been Esther. pitsky my whole life and so I'm. overcompensating to be fair mom to be. fair you did screw up on that oh that.
was not my choice oh that was dad's oh. yeah was oh yeah I the guy that got. banned from Rivers got to pick this yeah. I had no choice I I picked out the. middle name actually I wanted her middle. name to be her first name what's her. middle name Lauren that's beautiful. beautiful you know what you kind of look. like a Lauren yeah I mean well every. Jewish girl from back home yeah every. Jewish girl growing you're the only one. I know named that Esther yeah well for. this Century yeah yeah this Century for. the past hundred years no you know what.
I I like that name I'm down with it I. did it when I was a little bit she hated. it at first yeah I did and then I. envisioned when she grew up that she. would go by E Lauren which is weirder or. just Lauren most people just do the. middle name you could have gone by like. Bessie or what are other oh my husband. got an aunt Bessie Bessie right your. husband's got a what was your maiden. name before p. oh no I don't you know is that illegal. to put out to the world yeah cuz I want. to know how much better that was too cuz. then you got this man who's got shitty.
name taste and weird last name it was. pretty bad yeah you double that you. could do better I'll say it if you don't. if you believe we it B it out you bleep. it out cover your mouth mom cover your. mouth what is. it that's not that bad no that's kind of. cool pretty cool. oh he'll bleep it out yeah yeah so she. she could have been Lauren. that sounds actually r that looks pretty. cool too it it's very mid it's like more. midw yeah it's very not Jewish yes yeah.
well yeah I mean once I see your face. mom mom when Esther years ago said I. want to do comedy how did you feel be. honest I was shocked to be honest with. you yeah yeah we are too we're still. shocked yeah we're pretty it's it. boggles my mind boggles my mind so we. thought she'd be a dancer cuz she's been. dancing ever since she was five wow she. actually does I have I do know this. we've talked about this because my wife. was a a dancer as well and Esther shares.
some of the same. fluidity fluidity well you're. coordinated oh yeah do you know Andrew's. wife Esther yeah so you guys talked. about dancing before I believe we. did and also you guys used to be. building mates remember you guys lived. in the same building which one 111 North. debor you used to live on really yes. what floor 17th Floor we were above. you did you guys get it for like were. you in on the.
discount we we had um I we were uh it. was low income housing yeah it was yeah. yeah that's how we lived there because. of that uh because my mom we were my mom. was a single mother so we got we. registered for low-income housing and. that's how wow yeah at at 11-11 that's. so wild now where did you go to school. uh Lal oh okay yeah I went to Lal yeah. do you know that Lal Language Academy. right it's not too far away yeah yeah. and then Moody I went to Moody so to my. daughter and they removed me from Moody. yeah they literally kicked me out yeah.
she went uh the first year of preschool. and then they had all day kindergarten. that's wild yeah but so you so you sent. your kid to a Catholic that's like a. hardcore Catholic school too see I like. that yeah but I was a working mother so. I had you know no choice there was my. sister wasn't Jewish oh I really I wish. I met. her insane my sister wasn't Jewish and. then you met um asra's Dad how' you guys. meet uh at work oh wow where'd you work. at the time can I say can you say it. yeah cooking Treasures Office Cook.
County baby Treasures Office was it. instant love or would to take some time. um no we were co-workers and you know. I'd worked there for a couple years and. you know we saw each other and then one. day we went to lunch and then that was. it wow so did he did he pursue you and. you were okay with it right away it's. not one of those old stories from your. generation where it's like couldn't. stand the guy and then he kept bugging. you no not at all okay good but you had. a stalker ooh tell us everybody loves a. good stalker story yeah she she had like.
a. guy who was stalking her that's why she. so at her job she there my parents met. working government jobs which is so cute. um. and this guy like was kept coming to her. to find her and he broke into the. building where you guys lived wow yeah. and so then they had to move her into. like the underground floor lived in the. garage no like like moved me to the. Vault to the vault in the Cook County. treasures office and then my dad also.
got moved to the basement because he was. disobeying his boss I KN I knew it was. going to be actually was the first floor. right yeah but you could tell he got he. got he did something bad they were like. you go down there yeah and so that's. kind of that's such a cute Story I mean. it's no it is really cute love that. story it's not like like our these days. it's not like I'm swiping on an app. taking a [ __ ] at of Starbucks. fell in love I think when you meet like. that too it lasts well it has been look. at that yeah I want to some and what is.
it 37 yeah wow wow well cuz right cuz. Esther's. 46 cuz when your mom met your stepdad. Jeff yeah right it lasted and they met. in similar circumstances of where well. my mom met my dad show my mom worked for. the property management company that. managed a lot of those buildings and she. showed my dad an apartment I think it. was at wow I think it was at it was on. Lal but showed him in yeah because it. was the same owner I was between.
Dearborn and LEL right and I think she. showed him an apartment there and then. he asked her out on a date wow I think. that's how that they met through that. whole thing it's amazing that you two. from that region of the country came to. LA and carved out a career that's a. testament to many things but your. resilience subsidize housing sub but. also the talent I I think it's amazing. because I've been out there you know it. it's harder probably because I grew up. in San Diego it's a two-hour drive from.
La it's not that big of a you know this. was a big leap it's a big leap and a. scary leap and your mom probably wasn't. that supportive right in the beginning. not in the beginning yeah and it it must. have been a real um risk and you did it. and now you're on a billboard and with a. huge movie out that it's your movie it's. your movie that's unbelievable dream. come true oh that's clown. what a beautiful story and you're about. to be a mom I mean it's like what more. do you want.
[ __ ] that's the most amazing thing. that is what do you mean by that you're. going to have a baby everything else. you've done is [ __ ] she's saying. compared Mom did you meet her previous. boyfriend like Tony Hinchcliffe oh sure. yeah yeah Tony you like Tony red ban red. did you did you like any of the other. guys at all or no no they were all nice. yeah they're nice they go to Tony's show. when he's in Chicago oh that's cool did. you hate any of the guys that she dated. was there any guys you were like I. cannot stand that guy no wow mm you like.
they have low standards though for me so. like I think they were just any if I had. a boyfriend they were like this this is. good but David's a upgrade for sure oh. yeah he's a real upgrade he's a keeper. yeah yeah it's so funny that they had. low standard the way she said it they. didn't believe in me at all but it was. nice to hear you say that honestly that. you didn't really support the dream when. she first came out here no because she. was her third year of college second. semester yeah and she my husband picked.
her up at the bus station she was coming. home for the weekend and she comes. through the door crying and my husband's. like you're not going to believe that. she wants to quit school I mean she only. had maybe eight weeks left of her second. semester and everything was paid for a. year plus an additional my senior year. yeah you had you know another year but. we wanted to at least finish out her. third year of of college where'd you go. to school again champagne oh yeah you. wow that's a great school too do you. guys think she was. funny hold hold on one second one second.
no Bob can you it's embarrassing it's. embarrassing shut the [ __ ] up. man shut the [ __ ] up man my friend dude. hey good question yeah good question did. you think she was funny we didn't have a. clue why she even wanted to go out there. yeah right yeah she never made you laugh. and can I tell you something yeah. same no she's so she is Esther is a.
bright light in the comedy scene since. we met yeah. maybe I'd like to guess 15 years ago I. don't know how long we've known each. other yeah a long time a long long time. you guys and what's funny is um this is. going to sound very corny but I'm going. to do it anyway cuz we're here there's. sometimes when you're young you just. know some when some of some people have. it some people are proba going to quit. some people are probably going to get. too into drugs and alcohol or just. disappear and Esther was always someone. that I knew was she was just going to do.
whatever she wanted to do anyway and it. was going to work because she was just. good at being authentic to what she. wanted to do anyway and she was very. good at whenever I explain to people. Esther can I get that over again I think. you just got to run with it I gotta run. with it yeah um yeah I go um she's an. anomaly yeah and there's just no one and. I I I feel that way about myself too. like I I think that I'm just who I am. I'm Different focus on her okay go back.
to you yeah um Esther. right I forgot her name it's Lauren. Lauren Lauren so Lauren and you um I've. always got as soon as I saw you I got it. yeah you get it right away I looked at. you went oh yeah that's that's going to. work you should be proud mom you made. you made something good and you. shouldn't be proud of getting banned. from Rivers but you should be proud of. what you've created on the other side of. it yeah and we want everyone to please. go watch go watch drugstore June uh if. it's available after it's out in theater.
is going to be on VOD I imagine yeah. it's already for pre-sale and I just. have to say about my part in it oh Lord. you are great Bobby no I I thank you for. being a bad. friend. woo woo. woo. yeah. woo.
yeah.
