The Korean Takeover w/ Steebee, Dumbfoundead, & Peter Kim | Ep 154 | Bad Friends
hey bad friends fans or should I say. g'day mate I'm down in Australia and we. wanted to apologize to you guys for the. date changes that happened on the bad. Friends tour Vancouver Spokane Seattle. uh Portland we had to shift a bunch of. stuff around so I'm so sorry if that. affected you guys you should be getting. your money back if you want a full. refund or you can come to the. rescheduled dates. um we're sorry we had to do this because. Bobby is traveling and shooting I'm. traveling and shooting a movie in. Australia for two months so we're so. sorry sometimes things pop up and we. have to change the schedule we truly do.
apologize and all the bad friends dates. are going to be released very very soon. we're so excited we're trying to come to. as many cities as possible but again we. apologize if the inconvenience uh set. you guys back at all you should be. getting full refunds of those tickets. um or you just can reschedule with us. and use that for the new dates that. we've posted uh so sorry about that but. we hope to see you guys out there from. the bottom of our hearts we want to. thank you for being a bad friend you two. are bad friends who are these two idiots.
[Music]. we're bad friends listen welcome to. another episode of best friends right. the all Korean episode yep and I've been. thinking I've been thinking about this. idea since Andrew left right I go what. am I gonna do right and I decided to get. my three favorite Koreans you know in a. room where are they. that's why you happen to be one of them. oh what yeah I don't believe that we're.
your favorite Koreans there's Halloween. 2019. okay. okay look okay. I almost I almost could guarantee we. could find clips of you with Korean. guests being like you know what serious. being completely serious you're my. favorite Korean to other Koreans you're. not the fanciest one I like they're. fancier Koreans give us two examples. Aquafina oh she fancy Ronnie Chang he's. not Korean whatever is Asia.
wait Aquafina right half Korean half. Korean still count yeah yeah what's the. other half Steven Yoon a Chinese or. Steven Yoon. et cetera Etc I see that but in terms of. what in in a situation where there's no. show business and there was an. apocalyptic moment where I'm like I. gotta find the people I trust right and.
I can survive with and where I can feel. more comfortable where I can like you. know be the boss. I mean a place where I could be of the. boss right it would be this three you. needed three Koreans less uh successful. than you no no you guys are successful I. think that's what it feels like he feels. like the boss Korean in this scenario in. any other scenario not the boss Korean. you needed three Korean Subs of. Hollywood we're the underlings yeah okay.
what scenario am I not the boss. and you're we're able to hurt my. feelings I'm ready for it I I don't. think you feel like you're the superior. Korean in a room full of Hollywood. Koreans. whoa wow wait this room or any any given. room no no no no I'm not saying this. room I'm talking about in this room you. are Hollywood Elite rooms with Koreans. in it with a Korean case there John Cho. is there because he's always spoken.
about his stories like that I was in. this audition room and it was this guy. and that guy I'm not gonna get the part. that's what I heard a lot these stories. yeah he's so vulnerable right now I love. it you guys are doing a fantastic job. keep going man. I love it dude stay on them you're doing. great terrible dude you're doing awesome. I I don't know if this chemistry of four. Koreans in a room for podcasting quirks. it doesn't work it's working for you. right now oh it's working now oh it's.
working no we're talking over here in a. good way but it's working whoever wants. to talk can go like this no there's no. room and let me say something to you. right you can't come in here with. agendas.
you said this is the Korean episode. right yeah okay so can we do my segment. here. we will do a segment but we do segments. toward the end of it this is perfect for. now. all right all right yeah this is perfect. let me let me introduce let me introduce.
the podcast well yeah right and then. yeah I will introduce and then here's. what we'll do have faith in me. dumbfounded right you're gonna make some. sort of introduction of his a song yeah. let's make a musical Thing with Not. lyrics. guy oh I could I'll take the fifth if. you want yeah yeah you'll think what do. you mean the lyrics or Oh you mean the. harmony yeah yeah right so I'm gonna I'm. gonna introduce right and I'm gonna go. in an hour and then I'm gonna go well.
now it's time for her and then yeah yeah. so we have some lyrics with so we have. some Korean lyrics like chingus which. means friends. [Laughter].
[Laughter]. what's a [ __ ]. foreign.
accent yeah yeah all right so you say it.
and then maybe I'll do it after go ahead. [Laughter]. I just wanted to learn this real quick. okay but this is a part of my segment. that you're already doing. you're ruining my thing. he's taking his call host roll very. serious yeah yeah all right totally take. it I also didn't want you in this seat I. don't care this is Peter I don't care.
but you're doing my idea okay literally. taking my idea I already planned this. thing and you're taking that podcast. work okay let us be on your toes okay. right right that's what you don't plan. things okay anything can happen Okay. okay so you want to save this until your. segment well it's so similar so if you. could do something else how about this. this is going to exercise you right come. up with a different segment right now. while we're doing this. that will test your crowd absolutely not.
yeah. no because it's my OCD thing if it. doesn't do it we're gonna die or. something but let's just do this first. and then we'll do the segment we'll. figure it out okay okay so go ahead say. it the way you're gonna say it I'll say. to I'll say to you as if I was saying it. to you Bobby. and then I'm gonna say it to some random. girl okay okay go ahead Bobby yeah. Bobby just keep Bobby.
no extra words. it's a weird thing right he needs all. the brain power right now yeah yeah yeah. my brain is [ __ ] yeah so go ahead okay. yeah that's good yeah yeah. okay pretty good yeah. welcome to another episode of bad. friends the Korean episode. um we've got dumbfounded Peter Kim my. brother Stevie weevy in the house.
Andrew's in Australia shooting another. Hollywood movie with his Hollywood. friends. John Cena and Zac Efron and um the guy. that wrote the movie Brian Jarvis I. saved his life 20 years ago and he can't. even give me a line but anyway. um welcome to not one line but anyway. welcome to another Korean. right we're all Koreans in the room and. uh we have a very special thing coming. up right now um we have a segment right. that. um My Little Brother Stevie weebe.
created and here's the segment film The. but first off he's doing the song. segment. [Music]. this segment we are going to have the. better speaking Korean people Peter and. Jonathan talk to me and my brother Bobby. and we're gonna try to guess what.
they're saying in Korean. it opens so racist yeah yeah I didn't. like it it was so racist what do you. mean could I say something yeah yeah I I. hate that you created this segment and. you had to say it's a segment while. explaining the segment let me redo it.
we'll give you another shot I think we. should just jump into the song you know. just go open song. today we're doing career time where are.
the better speaking Korean people are. going to say phrases in Korean and we're. gonna try to guess what they're saying. you're very good okay why did you feel. like Neverland. so. this game sucks I mean the premise of it. sucks so bad.
it's the idea right Peter I loved I. don't know what it is. I love it. he came in with so much energy. is there you got to do stuff that you. probably don't think we'll know like. vocabulary and we're gonna try to guess. is there a buzzer. um yeah so if you where do you have. buzzers here guys.
we end it now okay cool let's end it. okay so okay so there's I guess the best. out of three. um so I get a turn or so I get it no no. turn we Buzz oh we buzz what do you. think the buzzers are for oh that's. right so so um you guys could go take.
turns right and then we'll do what maybe. five uh sentences wait what uh what are. we we're saying a sentence or saying one. word one word oh one word yeah what is. where this word mean. no no not just one word it has to be in. the context of a sentence like what you. guys did before right. let's just keep it at word I think it'll. be easy do you think you would get a. whole sentence one word yeah like a. whole sentence no one word no I don't. think you'll even get a word let's oh we. can't even get a word dude that's why.
this is a [ __ ] wash. no no you have to do it in a sentence. there's no adaptability with this guy. okay there's no bending there's nothing. it's his way or the highway it's always. been like this this kid has always been. like that no buses no buzzers no buzzer. so here's what we'll do we'll just do. that okay all right here we go there's a. sentence ready. foreign. okay.
wow. these are too easy okay way too easy. okay all right go ahead go complex okay. um. oh I think you might have gone a little. faster when are you going to school okay. baby. hungry. it's a game.
God damn it well she had some buzzers. guys okay why would we have buzzers. okay hold on hold on yeah hold on hold. up. all right you guys ready let's go here. we go. so. you have no lips.
you didn't know that I think you guys. aren't paying attention to my tape side. of the table okay. was he fast both of them yeah. they could watch it are you guys judging. too yeah yeah and this has been Fair yes. okay keep going 2-0 all right you go. corrupta. there was no way.
wait wait wait wait wait wait say it. again. say it again. you have no fat. no no no I'm not gonna lie I don't know. that one yeah but why'd you buzz that. maybe it's too hard maybe it's too hard. maybe it's too hard. [Music].
I had no idea. what came out of your mouth my friend no. you I can tell by your eyes fear base. bro that was too quick that was too. quick. I don't know it what does that mean what. is it I'm being dumb what is it Peter it. means like I'm like really sad.
I'm gonna give one Korean pop culture. question in English and you can answer. in English how about that's oh that's a. good one you know I mean something about. Koreans do you agree with like a Korean. I'm not gonna know it so maybe you will. know you might say let me guess. name one member of BTS.
right there dog. [Laughter].
sagudio. you've never heard this one no really. um what does it mean it means it's cheap. [Laughter].
um. uh. I think you you guys have to keep it up. like this yeah yeah you guys are way too. close you know what she put up what so. this is the height you're doing and this.
is the height this is the same height. okay so we keep it at we keep it. actually there are two pictures that are. exactly the yellow and the red so yeah. what can we use this oh yeah exactly. this is much better. now it's fair yeah so is this Fair okay. okay you're not above it no right here. wait what. right there right where the top is yeah.
ready yeah. choraptor. that that's a hard one I don't know that. one don't get too complicated oh okay. okay. um. I'm full yeah I got that okay I need. that one four zero I think Bobby really. knows. that's not what it is I think this. segment proved I'm more Korean than you. that's absolutely not true four zero I.
know but that is. yeah I will say though do you think. because he is younger that you grew up. more Korean in your family like do you. know what I mean I'm brighter you're. brighter in general no no I'm not no I. think my brother is um smarter than he.
did got better grades in school but you. got beat down more than me. wow.
beat me down worse than any of the drunk. guys. what's the worst he did. um one time he chased me with a kitchen. knife. and and then he beat me with a. vacuum cleaner with the vacuum cleaner. yeah yeah like one of those big Hoovers. yeah oh yeah yeah yeah with like the bag.
the 90s like that beat me with a ping. pong table. Yeah. holy [ __ ] no he was like the incredible. at first at least no no. every [ __ ] beating.
every beating no he was good let me tell. you something the beating of you with. the keyboards I wasn't there that's all. hearsay yeah he beat me with the. keyboard yeah yeah so I'm saying there. are certain beatings we weren't. witnessing of each other right but how. did he he's a little guy how did he how. does she strength thank you so much. yeah yeah. um so you're dead that's pretty bad what. about you Jonathan I mean you know golf. clubs more like obvious kind of beating. tools you know shoehorn uh but you know.
just shoe horns shoe horns like this big. no no no it's a longer shoehorn. like the one where you like put it in. your shoes. oh we never had do we have a shoe horn. growing up no yeah encyclopedias oh that. yeah. it's a longer yeah. yeah my dad was an alcoholic so he would. definitely beat me drunk yeah my mom. that's that must have been nice. to have an alcoholic because he was. inebriated too like yeah because at. least like he's he looks stupid when.
he's beating you like yeah my dad's like. Starks over like he's like memorizing. the alpha you know like Korean alphabet. while he's beating me yeah right right. yeah what did you do wrong. no I was the best kid that's the thing. oh you got straight A's. why are you crying I was a smart kid I. was I really was but he he just had. issues yeah he just wanted more out of. you or what was it like he just I think. he was just set he was UPS he was just.
upset with his own and I think my mom. was just like too much of a boss [ __ ]. for her for him yeah you know it's like. you know you know the words yeah like. Pride he I think was hurt every day. because like she made more money than. him or something. and it's like immigrant status. you were the only kid right no I have a. younger brother yeah but the older. brothers do get beat the most what were. you gay then. what do you mean I was always gay yeah. but out no no he started beating me when.
I was like young oh straight and gay. equal beatings oh yeah okay okay yeah oh. I have another segment idea. I don't know what segment that could. smoke right now. part two guys. so I didn't know your sexual preference. so this is what I want you to do okay.
literally you're going in an area that's. very uncomfortable for everyone what do. you mean you can't say time and then. look at the gay guy and go that's just. like wait what wait. a minute. I would love to do that.
yeah all right hey hold on you know. what's interesting about today this is. interesting because you're judging three. Korean butts too. yeah. I'm just saying there's there's three. Korean butts presented how often do you. see Korean buttons. your pose do you want me to do doggy.
I said I've said no no no no. I'm gonna show don't bend when you've. been over you don't show home. yeah. I don't want to show my hole. just straight up is it optional. if you're gonna show a hole you have to. put the whole thing through like your. junk your what do you mean what do you. mean what do you mean your package the. whole thing through all the way to the.
back oh so you have to tuck your own. dick yeah. but backwards. I'll tell you what dumb yeah I've seen a. lot of Korean man men's butts yeah I've. never seen Korean men's Buffalo Bills. whoa do you want to switch it to Buffalo. but you want it bite. I'm not doing my Toko milk right now bro. it's your game what do you want.
just gotta turn around oh you have to. turn around to reverse. label episode Buffalo Bill first but. um so go ahead it's true it's your. choice. yeah Peter it's it's your decision. whatever but it's your game okay well. would you rather see Buffalo Bill or but. but for sure okay okay okay. doordash I'll tell you what Pappy yeah.
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off for three and more displays. displayed collect your passions. what's a criteria plumpness like shape. plumpness and go ahead what are the. three criteria break it down. um proportions proportions. girth. girth interesting yeah like oh the the. the [ __ ] yeah. and then. um. how do you call it like.
bounce ability bounce so we gotta jump. we gotta do a jump jiggle. [Laughter]. that's right. guarantee you they've never seen three. straight Korean mentors. [Laughter].
I'll do it too. I don't want to see yours. because I'm gay you can't see a game. yes you can't see a gay bar no he needs. a shot too nope I might like it. I like it so why you can like it. [Music]. okay let's go.
[Music]. all right yeah no you don't have to do. whatever you want if you want to win if. you want to win yeah yeah yeah. oh all right. that's nice. it's jiggling like crazy this is maximum. jiggle are you getting it they're just. getting this I got it.
dude yours is gonna be amazing. this is why he could get the segment. okay wow nice. [Laughter].
yeah. oh. my God. [Laughter]. oh my God. I can't believe it.
this is not this is mine [ __ ] because. he had me begging him to do that like I. know no you gotta do it. the fact that you even pulled it a. little bit. I pulled it through dude all right Peter. it's your turn no Peter doesn't need to. do it you want to do it judge I'll judge. I'll judge oh yeah okay but did you take. a good look at all three I did yeah yeah.
unfortunately so break down the criteria. and why you decided. okay but performance matters performance. matters okay remember that okay coming. in in absolutely dirt last yes. [Laughter]. honestly the butt is cute yeah but I. committed. oh I pulled it through I know from. behind you never see that before I know. that was about to watch that was so sad.
that's the creativity of it that was so. sad the fact that you reached around for. yourself. and threaded you're really trying to. miss through I know you think I get some. points for commitment. you're on the board. if you didn't do that if you didn't do. that yeah pulling yeah I think you would. have came in second but oh wow oh wow. because it was looking plump and nice no. no like real scars or anything yeah yeah. yeah okay good thank you so it backfired.
backfired okay it did you know how they. say go back it hurts yeah yeah you went. a little too big I went too big yeah. yeah it's the pulling of the head of the. penis was just too much and I was like I. was like I know but there's not enough. there I was self-conscious because I. think I thought the thighs. oh my God. no I felt so self-conscious about it.
I improvised you went hard okay I'm. gonna send that to caac. I gotta say second. um seconds but had great shape looks. like there was. um some nice definition and great just. um presence yeah I'm gonna give that to. dumb right here yeah yeah yeah number. six and number one Stevie weebe that. jiggle that twerk yeah.
but if he didn't do that jiggle that. jiggle was crazy right yeah don't don't. quote me on that but you got a fat ass. you got a dumper. complimenting way. you got you know. you have a bubble butt bro yeah bro. obviously you'd be a fun bottom I think. if you ever ventured you'd be fun at it. what are you talking about you need a. fun bottle I don't know what that means.
it means. bro I'm telling you right now if you're. in prison you wouldn't be lonely no. you'd be there'd be alive you'd be. popular you'd be very popular so they. would want to do it to me oh the jiggle. why are you mad. if you were up there like you wanted. first place. so if you didn't Jiggle It yeah since we. went that far yeah let's take it to. Buffalo Bill no.
[Laughter]. but is this the first time you've ever. shown your blood to a game I did a. torque video. um on the Instagram my Instagram dude I. was losing followers.
really oh no yeah but you could have. gained some too probably. did you get any no are you sure I don't. know yeah you don't know I have never. hoarded myself out to a gay game show. like that if you're asking yeah you won. nothing I want absolutely nothing well. you look silver okay you know what some. of this might be picked up by like queer. blogs and you might get like gay fans. really who buy your music and stuff well. I do thank you for talking up my ass. cause they're not gonna see it so all. that yeah you guys all they have is your.
work great ass but have you been. noticing that because I have been. working out it looks you know what I. will say it looks like a little like my. boyfriend's ass who has like a I don't. know how I feel about that. I know his boyfriend right he's hot as. [ __ ] he's hot like don't [ __ ] he's. got like a rectangle but like a workout. butt defined yeah yeah no white no he's. a white guy but as a jawline like a yeah. it was you have like a square I think a. Brad Pitt's face but then put it on is.
that handsome yeah yeah no the bot no. honestly but your boyfriend sees a. handsome guy yeah he's very handsome big. is like he has a lot of girth. his dick yeah what's Steve Steve. wait why do you want it no no excuse me. you're it's like it's like calling my. girlfriend right did she have a deep. [ __ ] all right let's edit that out. sorry guys. I was just curious yeah it's crazy yeah.
I'm just curious yeah I'm curious about. a lot of things I wouldn't ask okay yeah. that's insane yeah well that was fun. oh I have another segmented idea though. you guys want to hear oh my God what is. it no 69. 69. that's where I draw the line I draw the. line there. your mind went right you said 60 and I.
go not no I was gonna We're not gonna do. I was gonna say because it I got an idea. because he was like you know he's been. working out and I'm like let's do a. thing where we take off our shirts and. see who no I'm not doing that yeah no. more clearly. yeah he's a normal human being sorry I. know yeah yeah just gotta be fun that's. all yeah I'm so sorry about this yeah. you never had my brother before I didn't. know first time. with him I apologize.
anyone listening right now if you were. to put any of us on stage who would get. the biggest laughs this [ __ ] guy yeah. he's a killer for sure how long have you. been doing comedy. uh 10 years he's a killer wow like he's. unfollowable can you follow him I have a. struggle no I did struggle opening up. for him. are you opening up for him I'm sorry I'm. sorry I'm sorry yoga for me bro okay. yeah yeah cool I'm so legit dude yeah so.
let me guys meet yeah how do you guys. meet. from that I think yeah one time and I. was like oh [ __ ] could I ask you. something so no matter how hard someone. kills just because you're a veteran you. will open up is that how it works. yeah yeah so you won't ever open up. because of the veteran status. well if I'm booked as a headliner and. people are there to see oh I see because. you're I'm not going to go you're. driving that's insane you're the draw. you're the draw yeah yeah I see yeah.
yeah it's like if YouTube was doing a. Coliseum and Coldplay open yeah YouTube. would never go hey you guys close it. which comedian would you not be offended. if they were like can you open for me. I've had people do that Tom Tom seguru I. did it in December oh yeah okay yeah. yeah because he does um stadiums and. stuff now and it's like I wanted to play. standing oh so like you know 15 20 000. seats stadiums where I just want to see. does that feel the same. doesn't that feel like crazy because. it's not like well the Rhythm the rhythm.
is different right you have to do broad. strokes and. um the timing's different but um it was. fine I was I was only doing 15 20. minutes and it was pretty crazy fun whoa. yeah because I was also proud of the guy. I was like oh my God I can't believe. yeah that this is where you're at now. it's amazing when you see your friends. do that. you go from you know open mic to over. the years becoming that it's really just. you know inspiring and it's I I'm.
constantly in awe of it you know but. it's great yeah you know he just did 30. 000 seats whoa it was just for music rap. yeah. that's like an Amphitheater dude right. there Festival that's cool it's an. outdoor festival and let me tell you. Steve um. if you want to date a hot Asian chick in. La you can't because he's got him oh. [Laughter]. oh I can't go out with any Asian chick. because he's oh dude he's he's got him.
you've got the you got them online it's. on lockdown. no no you know right he thinks that I'm. gatekeeping you you are gatekeeper no no. no. no no you're like. of course Steve yunus but he's cool. he's real close married yeah yeah he's. married yeah yeah but I'll I'll say in. this though. um I recently like I told you I'm going. through that like kind of healing.
self-care stuff he knows you know like. he's kind of been helping me out a lot. just off of substance all this stuff. um and I was struggling with this kind. of thing with dating and going out and. meeting girls because I feel like it. throws me off of my routine of self-care. yeah and I'm kind of navigating that I. don't know if you have any advice well I. mean I think because I'm going through. the same thing and I think it's um you. know you get these little dopamine. rushes when you a girl says yes to a. date out if you can you know hook up you.
know I mean it's all the same things as. drugs and alcohol to escape the moment. and not feeling certain things and it's. definitely. um an addiction in in a weird way you. know. um. and I I've been kind of look why am I. depressed I think because so and so. cancel a date or you know I mean or. whatever it might be but it's like I'm. really taking a look at myself you know. in terms of like why I'm doing these. things and almost I'm also hanging out. with people women that I normally would.
never hang out with because they're hot. that's your new drug yes that's your new. drug yeah and it's not a good place to. be wait wait you're saying you're all of. a sudden hanging out with hot women. no but no but I you know before I did. but like now it's like you know you know. there was that wasn't the first thing. you know like. now it's like they're hot but they also. have some sort of mental disorder. I mean not being real or they have like. they're on alcoholic or they have some.
behavioral issues yeah and lifestyle. issues that uh that it goes against my. own you know beliefs and ethics and you. know what I mean but I stay in it. because I want to get the. yeah man yeah the thing and it's like. you you're aware that this is happening. you look at your life and you go why am. I doing this is Is This Love no then. what is it sex probably you know I mean. and it's like you just kind of analyze. it and at the end of the day I don't.
think it's healthy well she also at that. point does she have an influence over. you a bad influence could she possibly. peer pressure you into doing something. no that's harmful for yourself no you. think no no no you don't think so no. because I when it comes to that I'm. pretty uh adamant about my routines and. you know going to meetings and doing all. that stuff what about weed what about. like oh sorry. I had a burger right here dude what if. um. right yeah and she's casually.
um. [Laughter].
you're not that old dude well we're. getting I'm getting up there I'm getting. up there um what if she casually this. hot chick you're hanging out with. casually is just smoking a joint they do. and it doesn't it they Vape. no at all why would it I I don't people. I don't want people to change their. behaviors okay okay you know I um I'm. just dating people yeah and then. sometimes it's like. you know it's not the right you know I. mean fit when it comes to a relationship. but you're in it because it's fun and.
they're nice people you know I mean but. it's like are you looking for another. relationship or are you it's funny. because you're trying to have fun when I. broke up with kalala I was like you know. this is gonna I'm gonna go on a run but. now that I'm doing it I'm like no I. think the reason why I've always been a. relationship was because of the feelings. I'm having now that doesn't fulfill me. right and it is nice to have one person. you can share a life with you know so um. yeah it's so funny we went from jiggling. bugs.
I have another question. no more games. unless the game's really good no well I. thought they were all pretty fun. um no. can I bring a penny. who's Penny you know who penny is. Steve Steve yeah don't bring a penny not.
stupid. now where does she fall into place in. this whole thing because because I saw. your post uh that's your video game. girlfriend right. [Laughter]. yes. a girlfriend in the game wife. you guys my favorite thing in the whole. world is opening up a box of Awesome.
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so does that what do you mean does that. bring you comfort like there is Comfort. there. yeah she's always there. it's like her it's like her that's crazy. yeah there's in in stardew Valley. there's probably eight women that you. can marry to choose from. and I've played it probably 30 times. and I always either pick Penny or Haley. [Laughter].
why why are you so. why is it so stupid why'd you bring it. up then because I just wanted to know if. it was real yeah it's real why are you. trying to hit him like. why why did you get so upset it's. ridiculous why'd you bring it up yeah. I'm worried about it what are you. worried about it's in the game that. doesn't matter it's weird. you find that ridiculous he just came up.
with those segments before this or. what's working you just jiggled your ass. in front of me yeah people are gonna. love it yeah yeah it's gonna bring the. numbers baby 100. sure the numbers are baby okay let's go. but Penny I'll tell you about Penny. though penny is a school teacher. what grade well you know uh the two kids. in it they don't really age but I'm. assuming they're like sixth grade maybe. yeah.
um and um she's a teacher yeah and then. here's what's great about penny is. you're running around in the town right. and Penny always sits underneath this. tree and she's like it like kind of like. with her knees tucked and she. contemplates life you know what I mean. and so and I'm like I just like her. because she's usually in the library. Haley is the hot one in town and she. takes photographs she loves coconuts and. um.
you sound like you're reading off dating. profiles she likes pancake walks on the. beach this is like the episode of Black. Mirror but Gone Wrong video game you're. afraid that he's gonna get lost in like. a relationship. and he's just gonna be uh pennies there. and 18 hours in I could see that. happening yeah you could right yeah yeah. we're not I mean you're not too far from. but there's one girl that I will never. marry I can't figure out why I don't who. her name is Emily and she's Haley's.
sister. looking. what you mean she looks like an animal. aren't they pixelated they're pixelated. what do you mean she doesn't look sexual. inner dialogue.
I can also say this people have done. people have done real life you know I. mean relationships no real like art yeah.
yeah. but look at really those readings. realistic paintings of them really. that's what you look at oh Dad yeah okay. so that's Penny that's penny in. realistic form I think you like the. wholesome kind you want a bookish yeah I. do I like pale legs.
yeah but here's what also about Emily I. don't like there's a guy named Clint in. the game and he's the blacksmiths right. and one day he writes you a letter. saying can you give hey wait is this. Clint yeah.
dude he's not Elliot or Sebastian if you. if Andrew could create his own character. this is how he would create yeah yeah. absolutely no no we have a guy Carlos. that used to work that he sometimes. worked here it was talking about a glory. hole he went a couple of times. you don't know what a glory hole is you. know what Gloria hole is oh it's like. when you stick your dick through the. hole yeah yeah or thank you yeah all. your ass no that's not a glory hole. that's a glory hole you could [ __ ].
through the hole no he's saying directly. to the hole is that a glory hole no your. butt on the your butt crack you put your. butt like what you you did before like. this but yeah how thick is the wall well. there's a hole it's just a bathroom. stall size I would say yeah but still. this much so how do you get the length. to do it the length of your what do you. mean you're dead well I mean so you. stick your butt against a hole Yeah and. then there's a little cheek like this. there's a wall yeah or you know what I. mean and then there's a dick but there's. still this much room yeah okay but it's.
doable Yeah okay or mouth okay yeah. oh this is the biggest that's the. biggest. do it to me. oh yeah you would love it and I love you. like a dick that's the problem I love. sucking dick but my mouth is yo why was. that the smallest open wide I've ever. lost in my life I'm like my jaws hurts. your whole face is opening wide but your.
mouth is crazy wait she's crazy that you. said like a minute I love sucking dick. but my mouth is so small but black dudes. let's go this shit's tight oh I mean. yeah. I hate both topics most most men think. it's tight yeah whoa so they come easier. sure yeah yeah yeah. [Music].
what about you guys have you ever been. with women who have smaller mouths or. bigger mouths I don't I don't know I. don't think about that yeah maybe we. have small dicks and we don't know yeah. I mean like even if this miles is small. it's probably just you know what I mean. throwing a hot dog and a gigantic Hollow. hallway so what do you what do you like. about that is just the suction about. sucking dick yeah he likes to taste I. love it yeah.
depending if I like them or not if I.
like them no so do you focus on the head. or the oh Steve I don't know. you brought it up. education on this podcast. you went to one no I'm just saying I'm. I'm trying to look back at the. conversation and I'm segued in the glory. hole and it brought us to this [ __ ]. oh and I said you could put them out. there too right right.
my friend Carlos has been to a couple of. glory holes right and he's like I'm. pretty sure it's women on the other side. but it could be a man but do you think. that that's a gay thing it's never a. woman exactly it's never that's what we. thought so you don't know who's on the. other side that's the whole point yeah. what that's the whole point of it oh so. it could be a man sucking your dick it. usually is. you never heard that in English this is. the hardest term I thought that there. was you you could at least you know it's.
like straightforward like who's on the. other side no Ricky Gervais tells a. story about in England a young man right. goes to a glory Hall penis comes through. he sucks it and when they leave they. both leave it's his dad. he didn't know what his dad's dick. looked like no do you know what your dad. said I don't know my dad. dude that is therapy years of therapy. shut up yeah this is a joke that's not. right that's what he says what are the.
odds of that happening in London come on. that's right I'm just saying but even if. it did happen What would happen you. think How would how would you go to. dinner that night. would you go to dinner that night I. don't know man yeah yeah we're not. eating hot dogs. [Laughter]. like how would they even find out right. after like right after they they. literally came out. the whole thing about that supposed to. be like an anime anonymity yeah yeah is.
it did they just randomly bumped into. each other the dad probably went oh son. and the son couldn't say anything. because he has come in his mouth yeah so. on the receiving on the receiving end up. so when the guy sticks kisses you the. whole does he just lean again. yeah yeah so he does he look down or. does he just lean against the wall if. he's a copy you do that.
no you know what he's doing he's. fingering his own butt like he's like. going like this and fingering it this is. the gayest podcast I've ever done in my. life and everything was initiated by you. guys yeah yeah yeah. thank you it's fun though man. this is yeah yeah. um so everyone went through am I the. first um gay person you've ever talked. to no oh okay no okay neighbors get yeah. but they just but as far as getting like.
detailed things like is that the first. Korean gay dude you've ever I think so I. think so. foreign. that like to do the sucking they get off. on that what's in it for them though. just a mouthful of [ __ ] right no it's you. know.
it does sound like you're interviewing. the first gay person yeah yeah you never. talk to him again that's what it feels. like though I haven't asked these. detailed questions so they get up on. that yeah yeah yeah it's like it's. Adrenaline Rush yeah I mean I don't know. can I get turned on why do you get. turned on by anything could I ask a. question yeah let me ask a specific. question because you're talking about he. might be the first uh gay Korean yeah. yeah that you've talked to is there. something like specific to a gay Korean. person that like culturally that you've.
gone through. with another Korean or in your life with. family or friends like it's there's a. gay part there's a Korean part right and. there's culture in both yeah traditions. and stuff but is there something that's. been particular with being a gay Korean. at like a Korean function or something. or like maybe an Asian gay event oh. there's plenty of those there's plenty. of that is an Asian gay event what what. happens to the Asian Gavin that's. different. everybody [ __ ].
oh it's a straight orgy I mean pretty. much but it's a very imagine like it's. like gold house but forget for origin. it's a gold house orgy yeah oh it's like. that except you know who knows like if. everyone gets down but like it's um a. gay Korean person and I have never had a. relationship and I've always been why. are you laughing. why the [ __ ] are you laughing yeah.
I thought of a field trip where well I'm. telling the story right now yeah okay. save the future. so gay yeah go ahead Another Gay career. like I have a gay cousin you know like I. know I have gay Koreans I know but like. I've never been in a relationship with. one why it's just never presented itself. right you know so like and I've been in. my current relationship for eight plus. years so like it do I. think it could be like really cool.
sometimes yeah absolutely because like. there's the shortcut right everything. you know all your cultural stuff you. like the same Foods I see you could talk. [ __ ] there's so many times I'm out with. my non-korean partner and I want to talk. [ __ ] about the restaurant or something. or whatever and I'm just like oh God I. gotta like [ __ ] whisper you know what. I mean like your parents would like you. with a gay Asian partner more than a. non-asian partner a gay Korean oh. specifically correct because my mom. can't speak English so she she's I've.
been she she's known my partner for. eight years and she's always like. okay all right right because that's it. and your dad passed but if he was alive. how would he feel right now do you think. did you you didn't come up to come out. to him no no he died before yeah oh wow. yeah you know how his dad died May I say. it yeah yeah his dad died in a Korean. spa. yeah oh wow and that's why they scraped. him too hard.
skin came off yeah no seriously no not. serious. I don't know man. was he in the steam room or the what was. going on he was in there but he had he. had health issues as well so it wasn't a. drowning thing no no okay okay no not a. drowning thing yeah um but they did find. him like floating on the oh wow oh wow. yeah and that's why we came up with this. TV show right because that's how I go to. spas and his dad died in one and we just.
kind of started talking about that world. and then we came up with a show and now. the show is dead as well so. [Laughter]. let me say something if I saw a room.
full of Korean men in an orgy or. whatever I would probably cry with pride. oh really yeah because you know I grew. up with all these old school beliefs and. this these strict [ __ ] rules about. other races and about you know gays and. trans and all that stuff and it's like I. always hated it I always like no Mom. Filipinos and Vietnamese people are. normal.
they don't just watch our children yeah. I mean they're not you know I mean. they're like I could marry one right if. I was gay it's not the end of the world. right it just happens to me I was born. that way yeah and they had these. stringent ideas about what you know. right it is to be a Korean person and I. always hated it you know yeah so it's. like if I saw that you know I mean I. would probably burst into tears I I. agree I think it would I think it would. blow my mind in a good way in a good way. you know I'd be like whoa and then the.
fact you know right after the pie grab. soup together oh yeah yeah I replenished. yeah yeah right yeah it's just yeah it. blows my mind and think about the. possibilities no nothing I just I I had. a great idea is it the field trip yeah. you know what's [ __ ] about you bought. your field trip thing ever since you had. the field trip ideas. right ever since you had the field trip. idea you haven't listened.
I have I'm on Alexa Pro now. it's helping me all right yeah so what. did we talk about. um. okay field trip. in the field trip yeah what are we. talking about the field trip. my mind went blank wait say it again. I was just gonna say because you no it's.
on the topic though because I was like. oh you know it has to do you don't. listen but anyway yeah no but I'm. getting better right guys. [Laughter]. is there a place maybe in Koreatown. where it's a gay spot and we could do a. field trip and then we could go in. together in our robes and yeah yeah. go ahead John no I'm just like no just I. just keep getting forced into these gay. scenarios.
yeah yeah it's just weird like it's just. curious I'm very curious. we spent 30 minutes talking about it. that's a problem right he always goes to. it was about something else. it doesn't a field trip really it's. about kids I know at this point we're. doing we're just being gay at this point. we're just being gay now has it been gay. it's been gay could I ask do you think. do you think you're more like do you get. you get book more for TV stuff right.
yeah. dude I'm sorry sensitive topic. do you feel like they're looking at you. more of a TV to feature Guy a movie yeah. okay so defense. I felt bad I'm gonna stop no just keep. going um no I want you to keep going. what is the difference like how did when. they look at you a certain way like a. movie guy to a TV show yeah not relevant. is there no has been is there a. difference because you're what do you.
mean like the way like oh he's he's a. feature guy he's only in movies a. character actor a guy oh a character. there is a thing right well I'll give. you an example right so I did. I'm gonna say it [ __ ] it hmm. so Nick Kroll and Ike baronholtz had a. movie or TV show on Hulu right the. history of the world and I did it oh. yeah that was with Ronnie too I didn't. know that okay I didn't know it he's in. it too yeah I know I thought you guys. were both in the same skit we are in the. same skit because yeah history of the.
world yeah yeah but he's Genghis Khan in. the skit and I'm just some random guy no. no are you serious yeah yeah and he's on. the poster I'm not oh no is that oh no. it's fine I love the guy yeah he's hot. and relevant right but there's a side of. me it stings a little bit because I know. those guys but I get it could I say this. the war's not over. why do you say warm yeah. [Laughter].
Wars are great wow I love horse I'm. Korean yeah right that's that is that. Korean what is that about Koreans though. it's the what han han it's just the. combative it's not combative it's I I. believe it has something to do with. oppression yeah the Japanese oppressing. us right yeah it's it's like years of.
like historical trauma right it carries. on into Generations right and that's why. there's so many um Korean Revenge movies. and we love them we're obsessed with. we're obsessed with them and it's like. comeuppance right and we'll be winning. at the end Justice Justice right and we. don't like authoritarian situations. right and so we I still I have that it's. not a bad thing it's not unhealthy I. don't think right right because I love.
everyone I really do I love and Andrew. working I love Ronnie working I love. when you got that Will Ferrell movie I'm. so [ __ ] happy for he's in a he's the. villain in a Will Ferrell movie with him. in Aquafina right whoa yeah so you're. killing it we've done two movies yeah. back to back this year yeah and when I. see you on set I'm so proud of you yeah. but there is a little bit of a hun there. where I I like to compete yeah I mean I. like to go you know what the war's not. over yeah.
you know and it's like I don't think. that's a bad thing can I ask you do you. think other races have Han too like like. you know because those other I like us I. don't think huh there's other ethnic. groups that have been [ __ ] over as. well you know yeah Native Americans. black people in America like do you. think they have hunt yeah Jews you think. they have hunt too I think that if you. look at I don't want to name certain. ethnicities yeah right but there are. some ethnicities that there's real wars. going on where their camps where certain. camps cannot be in the same Club as.
another Camp because it'll be actual. physical violence right we don't have. that. okay do you think we've held exactly. whenever you do that I love it okay the. Asian company I love it did actually. sound a little bit okay. do you think okay let me ask you this do. you think it's manifests. [Laughter]. have hunting right now.
oh my God that's what I'm trying to get. to okay come on dude do you think it's. because we've suppressed that's why we. have Han as opposed to other people like. still in the war fighting in the war do. you think maybe like we're not fighting. out outwardly we're like we have it. inwardly like we have that going on you. got a point there like the past we don't. know how to express it so except for. like when we're drunk and singing yeah.
yeah that's like the only time you've. you will ever ever see like Koreans. being emotional right yeah you know but. I think there is something along the. lines of like we don't know how to. express our emotions and we have this. like thousands of years of like being. [ __ ] run over yeah like Manchuria Etc. so like it's like a chess we play chess. but but let me try to trade later now we. we. we take that energy into success I mean. look at we've such a small country South.
Korea right right but look at the. companies that we have Hyundai Kia yeah. I mean Samsung Samsung et cetera et. cetera look at the film industry there. yeah that's that's all the music right. and it's a small thing I think that's. because of that Han of oh the work ethic. too yeah and just showing up you know me. expressing ourselves in that way right. in many for many years I'm not saying. that I think that every race is funny. but there was a little bit incred in La. where Koreans in the beginning were the.
funny stand-ups now you got Ronnie and. uh you know all these other people and. they're very funny or even in many ways. but in the beginning it was Koreans you. know I mean you know I think you know. you had Margaret and Henry Cho and you. know so do you feel like they won the. war who the Chinese in the end in. entertainment or is it War does the war. continue does it ever end it doesn't it. never happened the war never ends it. will never not in my lifetime the war my. war will not end but your war will end.
when you think you won I'll never win. he'll never win so the world. I constantly put myself in a position. yeah of to be victorious. you do I always do why do you do that. because it motivates it drives you it. drives oh to drive to keep going yeah. yeah that's very interesting that you. say that at least you know interesting. I'm aware of what well we all do it in. some ways we do it yeah yeah yeah I. asked that because I ask myself too like. when does the war ever end you know and.
when do I feel like I won the war I. don't think there ever will it's never. anything yeah well that's why I'm not. having kids so that it doesn't like get. oh you can translate down to the other. Generations right right some chopping. and breaking that generational yeah yeah. ends with me I just realized this. there's two two types of Koreans yeah. right we're the other type we're all one. type. you always say this we're the you said. it dirty Asians right we're the dirty. ones we are what do you mean dirty ones. like like a little bit of the Misfits of. it all oh no yeah what are you what are.
you saying then like when when dad was a. kid right he you know his friends went. to school and stuff and my dad shoe. shined yeah but he also stole. pickpocketed right and yeah and he. survived he was a street kid right yeah. yeah pickpockets sell things and he had. his little Merry band of you know I mean. and there's just you know he was he's. not an aristocrat he's not high and. mighty mom has a little bit of the royal. kind of like snooty Iranian thing yeah. she likes what she you know designer.
[ __ ] yeah yeah yeah but Dad is more like. us I think you know what I mean oh yeah. but I have a little bit of the designer. stuff but it's like when I'm in a room. with the yuppity Asians right you know. what I'm talking about you start getting. angry then I get angry I just I'm a. whale aware I'm with them oh you do oh. yeah. what's a dead giveaway then like when. you're hanging out with them what's. clothes number one the way they dress. right the way they handle themselves. like if some of them will never do tiger. belly because of the topics I bring up.
wait you're talking about like Hollywood. Korea Hollywood. oh awesome Oh I thought you were talking. about in general in general too yeah in. Hollywood as well oh there's a division. there's Korean I don't want a name. there's Korean but I won't do tiger. belly.
[Laughter]. I'm sorry my point is is that yeah there. is we're one time yeah yeah do you. believe that or not yeah I would you're. straight. no yeah I could say I got that there it. is again my family I consider to be kind.
of the yellow trash if you will us too. growing up yeah my favorite yellow trash. our dad for sure yeah yeah yeah yeah. yeah yeah can I tell you story uh my dad. was uh I mean this is not a segment or. anything. um. he had an apartment on his own like when. he was getting his car get his clothing. store and uh well and I went to visit. him so we my dad had clothing stores in. San Diego but no this is Arizona I know. so he would some his he would drive to. like Sacramento and yeah Riverside but. he was scouting out places in Arizona.
and I didn't know he had this secret. spot and I'm like he's like all right. let's go to the his apartment he. literally had the bare minimum a. mattress. a hot plate and like just a razor that's. it in a bar soap and so it dawned on me. I'm like oh this is the way he would. live without meeting Mom this is him you. know that's you. no I have I have a computer no. you need it for your business I know but. what do you mean I have I have stuff.
like even when we go shoe shopping don't. bring up my two preferences is it plain. Jane yet you just want Brown. I go look at these fancy ones no I don't. like it you're very like playing plain. what's wrong with that I think you'd. kind of transition you're like more of. the Hollywood designer and and you kind. of hung back you know because I was a. designer there you go I mean you were. trying to put me on the shoes the you. know the designer what is that Golden. Goose. exactly he was really talks ain't good.
enough I mean there's a million dollars. they're not because they look like. chunks but they're not. dude break them out let me take a look. those are ridiculous let me take a look. at this I would just wear those every. day of the week those are Chucks no. those are not real stops up for a second. all right it's [ __ ] what you're. doing what do you mean because one night. I was wearing these and you go where'd. you get those I was placating to your.
desire so. oh so you were lying then oh I I wanted. to make you feel good a little bit. that's sweet but at the time. that's really nice. okay yeah yeah Chucks that's that's I'm. more that okay good congratulations yeah. thank you for being a bad friend thank. you for being a hangout. [Music].
oh.
