Something’s Bubbling | Ep 335 | Bad Friends

Right. >> You got it. >> Any woman, you got it. >> Anything at all. >> Pretty woman. >> Blue by you, baby. >> I love Roy. >> I know you do. And here's a fact. Orbit. Orbison. >> Every baby he's ever had came out with. sunglasses. every single baby.

>> That's a fact. >> Google it. >> Uh, Google it. Uh, ain't going out like. that. Ain't going OUT LIKE THAT. AIN'T. GOING OUT. AIN'T GOING OUT LIKE THAT. SEE, I have songs in my head as well. >> You're a big song guy. >> Yeah. Cypress Hill, baby. >> You two are bad friends. >> Who are these two idiots? >> A white dude and an Asian dude. >> You two are disgusting. >> Well, you two are something. >> We're bad friends. Who got back their. new their new old car? You did.

>> Ain't going out like that. Ain't going. OUT LIKE THAT. >> AIN'T GOING OUT like. getting it out. Getting it out. It's. good to see you, man. We talk forever. We've been talking forever. We keep. talking. >> We keep talking. >> We talk until you to stop listening. >> And that's them the rules. >> And I hope you keep listening. I just. got back from Scotland. >> No, you didn't. >> I did. You told me you didn't go. >> What? >> Yeah. You told me you didn't go.

>> Oh, yeah. I did tell. >> Yeah. Yeah. Did you go? >> Yeah. >> WHY WOULD YOU TELL ME YOU DIDN'T GO? >> I like keep you on your toes. >> NO. NO. NO. WHY? IT'S SO HE'S LIKE, "I'M. IN NEW YORK.". >> I like to keep you on your toes, Don. >> I go, "Are you in Scotland?" He goes, "No, I'm in New York.". >> I'm in New York. >> That's what he said. And I've got So, what's the truth? >> I went to New York to get a slice. >> Yeah, >> dude. >> I went to Cambodia. But. >> anyone can say things. >> I lied to you. That's my point. I lied. to you for actually I didn't end up the. day I was supposed to be there. We got. our flight diverted halfway there. I'm. texting I think I texted Carlos. I had.

to go down to Atlanta. There was a. tornado in New York. Not a real thing. So they made us go to Atlanta. Then from. Atlanta they were like we're going to. get to New York tonight. I was like. great. I'll make my flight to Scotland. We take off. My flight to Scotland also. takes off. >> into space. >> Into space. >> Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Because that's a space. move. >> Well that's where Scotland is in space. Scotland's in space. So I went to. Scotland. It was amazing. Had so much. fun. And I ended up going a day late, but it was great. >> It was great. >> Scottish. >> Yeah. >> And all the Scots. >> say William Wallace. >> All the Scots were like, >> "He's coming down the hill.

>> You like Scotland. You like our food. now, Andrew. Do you? Do you, Andrew? You. talk about it on Bad Friends? >> You like my food now, Andrew? >> Really good. >> Is it good?". >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Did we talk bad about their food on the. show? People got mad at me. >> I don't remember. >> People came up to me in the restaurant. They're like, "Is the food as bad as you. talk about on in bad f?" I was like, "The food's great." And they're like, "No, >> we never went to Scotland.". >> That's what I'm saying. But I've been. >> Why would you say that? >> Cuz I've been before. >> Yeah. So, no, >> it improved. >> Okay. Is it. >> You got. >> Is it better than New York?

>> Ain't nothing better than a slice in New. York. Hey, how you doing? I ain't forget. about. >> When I walk around New York City, I get. a slice. >> Yeah. >> No, it's it was great. And then my buddy. Joey's wife ordered uh pizza for. everyone late night hanging out. I was. like, "God, what a good move." poof. And. then she goes, "I got three pepperonis. and one corn and chicken." And I was. like, "That's not a real pizza." I've. never heard of corn and chicken in my. entire life. It's a. >> Wait, wait. It's a big hit in Scotland. >> Wait, wait. There's corn in the chicken.

>> Corn and chicken pizza. >> Yeah. >> Never seen it in my life. >> I prefer the chicken in the corn. >> Yeah. >> That's more of a difficult process to. make. >> Put the chicken in the corn. >> No. In I put little chickens inside the. kernel. >> That Yeah. >> Someone got a haircut, huh? >> Your hair sliced. Sliced and diced. >> Yeah, I Me, too, dude. Look at me. >> I got a I got a snip, too. >> We all do. >> We all got snips. >> Snips, DUDE. IT'S SO HOT. THAT'S WHY. >> IT'S. >> IS IT GLOBAL WARMING? >> Way too hot. >> It's a myth. >> You think it's a myth? I don't know. >> I think you're a myth.

>> I think you're a myth, dude. I think. you're mythology. >> You're a mythological creature. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> You're a siren like I talked about. earlier. >> Yeah, >> dude. What if we find out he goes home. to his wife and he talks with a regular. American accent? This is all a big put. on for the past six years of our life. >> Exactly. >> No, dude. No, but Scotland was great. It. was also hot in England, which is. impossible. It was hot. >> Yeah, it's bad, dude. With all the. wildfires in Europe. >> Oh, I know. Oh, yeah. Spain. Right in. France. >> Yeah, in France. All the wildfires. >> What happened in Espa? A bunch of fires. in Espa. >> Yeah, >> lots of fires. Yeah, >> this happened in Spain today.

>> Hundreds of migrants with wet suits and. inflatables reach Spain's. >> And when they say migrants, it's. Mexicans. They they swam a long line. >> That's so far. >> That's a long across the Atlantic. >> Yeah. The African Mexicans. >> Yeah. >> So, this is them jumping the border. He. has Burberry on. What the hell? >> Yeah, >> they give that out for free now if. you're if you're enter the country. >> Yeah. >> Saying what's up. >> What's up? >> Wow. >> Oh, look at that. Who cuts the fence? I. want to know the guy that cuts the. fence. >> What do you mean cuts the fence? >> Well, cuz you see them going sneaking. through the fence. I want to know who's. clipping it. Who's got the wire cutters.

to cut through the fence? >> Wow. >> See, they're handing them out waters. >> You got the edgar cut. >> They climbed the fence. What are you. talking about? >> They just cut through the They had a. video. They were just Someone had cut a. hole in the fence and they were going. right through it. >> Huge. >> Oh, you know what? I'm addicted to. >> Timothy. JIMOTHY. >> OH, IT'S SO CUTE. >> SKUNK, RIGHT? What is it? >> What is a skunk? >> Who is Jimothy, dude? >> I tell you, YOU DON'T KNOW ABOUT JIMOTHY. GUY. >> I'm behind. Oh, the raccoon. YEAH. >> OH, GUY. DUDE, I WANT ONE. >> You want a handicap raccoon?

>> Yeah, it's a It's a skunk. >> Handy. Well, you used to be. >> What is it? >> It's a raccoon. >> Oh, it's a raccoon. My raccoon. My. >> No, but I think you're still correct. I. think a handicap raccoon is a skunk. >> Maybe. >> I think that's what they are. >> Yeah. But let me tell you something. If. I had never heard of Jimothy and I was. in my backyard smoking a cigarette or. whatever, saw it. >> and saw it. I WOULD FREAK THE [ __ ] OUT. >> The world's coming to an end. >> I go, "OH MY GOD, HIT HIM WITH A BAT.". YOU KNOW, >> DON'T KILL JIM. >> YEAH, I would kill Jimothy. >> No. No. >> WOULD THAT WOULDN'T YOU FREAK THE [ __ ]. OUT if you had never heard of Jimothy. and you saw Jim in your backyard? >> Oh, he got that triple S. That short. spine syndrome. >> Oh, >> that sounds like a Theo von isn't.

>> He got that short spine syndrome, dude. >> Yeah, >> Jimothy. Dude, >> there was a Chinese guy with one eye. with short spine syndrome. >> That's a The von bit. >> We had a lot of good a lot of bad. friends loved over there, man. Humans. can get it, too. Just FYI. >> Let me see. Humans. Well, no, I don't. But. >> Oh, wow. Carlos, what do you go? Why do. you go darker? >> He goes so dark. >> Yeah. >> By the way, Carlos's hair is coming in. >> Oh, yeah. >> Look at Look, just bend down a little. bit. Look at that, dude. It's like. getting full. I said he's What if you.

hate it? >> What if it all grows in and you're like, I didn't like it. I didn't want it. I. wanted to be bald. >> That is a fear for sure. >> You do? Huh? >> No, but I'm into it. >> You going to grow out really long. though? >> I'm just going to go as long as. possible. Like see what my I have a new. gay barber and I'm going to let him. >> Oh, I love gay barbers. Oh, they're my f. >> Yeah. Slice and dice you. >> Yeah. >> He's great. >> Spin you around in that chair. >> You want crap or you want square in your. back? >> No. I mean, I wanted to do a line here, too. >> Oh, you want like a cool like a young. guy? Like a cool young hip guy. >> Yeah. From the '9s.

>> Uh the trip was incredible. I then I. went to Jolly Old England. Had a good. little time in England. Uh met some cool. people. I met the owner of Palace. You. know Palace? Skate Shop. >> Oh, I love Palace. >> I know. I met the owner. Wow. >> Pretty cool. Yeah. >> And I was like, I own. >> So, let's not talk about when you were. gone, what my week looked like. >> What? >> What happened? >> What? >> Bad stuff. >> No, not bad stuff. Um, I didn't leave. the house for 5 days in a row. >> Why? Oh, you were not feeling You. called. >> Yeah, I wasn't feeling well. I was I was. bedrotting. >> Yeah, bedrock. >> Yeah. Yeah. And um I watched things.

>> Yeah. Like Ken Burns, you know. >> You're on your Ken Burns kick lately. You're on a documentary. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> What do you watch? And I didn't I just I. just had sex. >> with Ken Burns. >> Yes. Yeah. Very tight. Incredible. Very. tight. Historical. >> Yeah. It's like rust his butthole. >> Like an army ration can. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Some gold. It's great. Yeah. Um. you got to try again. Ken Burns. >> What historical documentaries did you. rip through?

>> I did. I saw Vietnam again. Civil War. >> Civil War. >> It's a good one. It's a good war. >> Winter Soldier. >> Yeah. Winter Soldier was a good. historical. >> first did that. >> Oh, I saw another comment. I saw another. comment today on the internet about. Odyssey about someone had like. >> what's her name had her ears pierced. She had three whole piercings in her. ears. >> and they were like, "You couldn't cover. that up for the, you know, for the. historical reference." The actress, what's her name? Uh, Zena. She had like. multiple ear piercings or something. >> Well, she's a god, so it doesn't matter. >> Gods can have piercings.

>> Yeah, they can have whatever they want. >> I don't disagree. >> Yeah, >> I don't disagree. >> Yeah, Poseidon can have a piercing in. his penis. Who gives. >> He did. That's where it came. It's. called the Prooseidon Pierce. >> Yeah. Yeah. But uh you got to watch it, dude. >> I know. I didn't have a dime of time. I. was having a good time jumping around. >> You're not I I feel like you're not. going to watch it in the theater. >> I'm going to But I got to tell you, the. last time I looked, I told Carlos, I was. like, "Look for me." And there was no. seat. Everything was sold out. Everything's still sold out, dude. It's. like impossible to get a couple of. seats. >> Well, you want to see it in 70. millimeter. >> You have to. >> No, you don't. I saw it at the Regal.

North Hollywood a [ __ ] theater. >> These guys have both said you should see. it in 70. >> You should. >> Yeah. I'm going to I'm going to wait to. go till it thins out. It's. >> You promised me you're going to watch. it. >> Scouts Honor. >> Scouts on. >> Yeah. >> Scouts. >> Yeah. >> Blow. I rewatched that. >> Blow. >> I rewatched Blow. I rewatched uh Catch. Me If You Can on the Plane. >> One of the greatest I mean, one of the. greatest. >> You know what's great about that is. Comforting. >> You're comforted by these movies. >> I don't know why, but I love it so much. >> I know. I have a lot of comforting. movies. The scene The scene of him in.

the hotel negotiating her price and then. tricking her by giving her like a bigger. check than he owes her and her giving. him cash. >> Is that Scorsesei. >> Spielberg? >> No, Spielberg. >> Wow. >> Does he miss that guy? My god, that. scene was so good, dude. With her with. Jennifer Garner. Oh, and she's like, "How much would I cost if I was in a. gift shop?" What a line, dude. >> Watch Disclosure Day. >> Disclosure Day. >> It's out on streaming. >> right now. Yeah. >> Okay. I can watch it at home. >> You're going to see the downfall. Why? >> The downfall of Spielberg.

>> No, shut up. He's still the. >> Was it good? >> Okay. >> I'm sure he's still the man. It was. okay. >> Yeah. >> Well, it's blunt, right? >> Mhm. Yeah. >> Yeah. She's great. >> She's good in it. >> Yeah, she's good in it. >> Not her fault. >> It's never her fault. >> Who wrote it? >> Spielberg, I think. >> No. No, there's no way he wrote that. >> David Cap. >> David Cap. >> The guy who did Russ. >> It's too close to Close Encounters. >> I love Close Encounters. It's. >> It has that vibe that we need to get.

here. >> Sure. But it. >> right to see the alien. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> And then I slipped into the Marilyn. Monroe documentary on the plane which I. >> tell me I don't know nothing know. nothing about. >> I got to tell you. >> Excuse me master. I know nothing about. her. >> Okay. >> The mystery what is it called? The. mystery of Marilyn Monroe. The amount of. tapes that this guy has who put this. together of like confidential audio. tapes like calls between her and the. president and stuff. >> It's crazy. I mean, so obvious they had. her murdered. Like so clearly they had. her killed, pled up and killed and they.

covered it all up and so many people. knew. Like everyone in Hollywood knew. because she was rubbing elbows with. people she shouldn't have rubbed elbows. >> Is she hotter than Margot Robbie though? >> 100%. She was the hottest star I think. we've ever had. Ever. Ever. Ever. Dude, they have video of her. >> This is pre lip filler. >> She's mythological. >> She was She should have been in the. Odyssey. >> Yeah. You know who Elizabeth Taylor was. beautiful back then. >> Stunning. >> Stunning. But what I'm saying is this is. this is pre getting work done and you. see her without any makeup and Marilyn. Monroe. >> Look at how beautiful I'm I'm more of.

Elizabeth Taylor. >> Do you like how I look, Robert? >> Yeah, >> she's hot, dude. >> That's a good. >> That was Elizabeth Taylor. >> No, but Marilyn Monroe stunning. Stunning. >> Oh my god, look at her face, dude. >> She looks like Julie Andrews was hot. like that when she was young, too. Beautiful. >> Yeah. >> But Marilyn Monroe, you could tell, man. That was Hollywood weirdo stuff. Weirdo. stuff, dude. >> Yeah. Also, by the way, I I called I. called cuz I wanted to find out what was. going on for your birthday and you're. traveling on your birthday. What's with. you avoiding fun on your birthday? >> Why does it have to be on my birthday?

>> It doesn't, but it's fun when it's on. your birthday. >> Okay, you canceled Hawaii. >> I'm not What do you mean? I didn't. cancel Hawaii. >> That's what they said. >> No, we just haven't booked it yet. >> Are you going to Hawaii? >> ARE YOU GOING TO HAWAII? >> MAYBE. >> NO. If you don't, it's going to really. upset me. Pretty. woman. >> Anything you want. Pretty. >> Okay. Anyway. Yeah. You are you going? >> Do you know why I CAN'T GO? >> I need.

>> Do you know why? >> Why? Because there's no golf courses out. there. >> Well, there's nothing but golf courses. out there, first of all. Second of all, the amount of things I'm seeing on the. internet. Tourists go away. Hawaii. doesn't want us there. >> That's true. >> Read it. It's all over the news. Go away. tourists. They do not want us there. >> They want us there. >> No, they don't. I I promise you when you. go there, >> Google Hawaii tourists go away. And I'm. telling you, it's every news article. now. They're tired of it. They want us. out. They don't want Howies. I'm a. Howley and I I got to get out of there. No whites. Get out. Anti- tourist. They're doing it now. It's like a huge.

protest. They're beating up [ __ ]. tourists because they're they're kicking. the [ __ ] out of them. They don't want. them there. >> Yeah. >> And you could pass. You got the. >> I do pass. Yeah. Me. >> Not me. I'm a Howley dog. >> Yeah. Visitor arrivals dropped roughly. 829,000 falling five almost 5% recently. because of this uh protest. That's a. lot, dude. It's a lot of people. They. don't want them around. So, what am I. going to do? Do I have to put on I got. to do brown face to fit in? >> Yeah. >> I'm telling you right now, you have so. many fans out there that you're going to. be fine. >> Yeah. You're going to be You're going. >> I'm going.

>> Yeah. If you don't go, >> I'll go. >> If you don't go, I'll be so upset at. you. >> I'll go. >> Is he Is that true? You'll be mad. >> No, I don't know that he's going to go. >> I don't know. Yeah. >> Andrew would never lie to you. >> Yeah. Look, look at me right now, dude. >> Scout. >> Scouton. >> Scouton. >> Scout. >> I'm going to go for you. I'll go. >> Okay. I think we should do a Hawaiian. version of Bad Friends Out. >> I totally agree. I'm mad that we're not.

doing anything for your birthday. WE'LL. CELEBRATE BEFORE, BUT ON THE 16TH, I'll. be there. My birthday is September 17th. On the 16th, I'll be there. Why don't we. have the dinner then? >> We can. We. >> I have to tour. I have a date in Salem, Oregon or whatever. >> You don't even know where you're. >> I DON'T KNOW WHERE I'M GOING, BUT THAT'S. I have a date somewhere, >> you know. Have you don't have cats? >> No cats. >> So So this is what a cat does. When a. cat leaves for the vet, cuz I don't take. all three cats to the vet sometimes. >> Can't too many cats.

>> Yeah. But when that cat comes back, it's. as if those two other cats have never. met that cat before. >> because something happened. >> No, they smell something, >> right? So they start hissing at each. other. >> Oh, wow. >> It's really sad. >> It's like if you went to Scotland, came. back and like. it's like, who are you? >> Well, cuz they saw the other side. >> No, they it's a smell thing. >> Yeah. Yeah. They picked up his scent. while they were there. >> Yeah. And another thing is is that I. have now cuz Kila left, she got a new.

dog. >> She left for Hawaii. So the dog's at my. house now. Her name is Lady. So now I. have four dogs and three cats. And. sometimes Jules just leaves. I'm going. to rave. You know what I mean? I go and. I have seven animals in the house. It. stresses me the [ __ ] out. >> Too many animals. Feline nonrecognition. aggression happens when one cat smells. completely different and is mistaken for. a stranger. So they think the cat is not. who it was before. Well, perhaps it's no. longer the same cat. What if they switch. out cats behind our back?

>> Oh, >> something could be. >> No, I know that it's my cat. >> How do you know? >> Because I memorized all the little. things. >> They're getting better. They're getting. >> They're getting good at duplication. >> Really? Like, you know, like Goon has. like one little stripe on his nose. I. recognize, you know, >> be careful. >> What do you mean? >> You might be You might have inherited. like a cat from the machine. Like they. could have fabricated this cat, sent it. in your house. Why would they do that? >> Exactly. Why would they do that? >> No. No. No. Explain to me why would they. >> camera cat? That thing could be filled. with cameras.

>> Anyway, I'm not falling for this your. lies anymore. Yeah. >> Yes, you can clone a cat. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. But it would take that would take. months and months. >> now for them now. Now they're doing it. fast. >> 24-hour. They're doing it. >> Wow. >> Nuclear transfer. >> Is it cheaper now? Because remember we. Googled it years ago. >> 35 grand. >> That's still If you loved. >> I think Tom Brady did that with his dog. I think. Yeah. >> I think Tom Brady did it with Tom Brady. >> Yeah. >> I think he was a clone of himself. >> Like Merryill Streep did it. I think. >> she cloned her dogs. Wow.

>> Yeah. >> You would never. >> What do you mean. >> clone? >> No. Smart people don't do that. It's. like a. >> You know what? I would clone one. >> I know. It's Goby. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Go. >> I love her so much. >> Go forever. >> Yeah. It's just like when Jules calls. cuz all the dogs sleep in her room. >> Mhm. >> But Gobi will stay out. What do you mean? It's just like, of. course, they sleep in her room. >> I can't deal with her. >> She's a protective force. They feel safe. around her. >> No, no, no. I. >> Your room is a chaotic. >> It's There's no chaos. There just.

There's a lot of. >> fluids. A lot of fluids. >> So wet. The whole room is wet. >> It's moist. It's humid. >> The ceiling. It's Miami. >> Dripping. It's. >> Yeah. >> My room's like Miami. Yeah. Yeah. It's. definitely Grand Theft Auto. >> I had a I had a uh I had a dream that. something is coming. >> Dude, I've had dreams, too. Tell me. about your dream. >> I had an earthquake dream. big big. earthquake dream and I thought. >> what's actually going to happen? >> What if a big one is coming? >> Are you an earthquake? >> I know they're not my friend. >> Yeah, >> but I but I did dream about the other. one before it came too. >> Yeah,

>> I think a big one is on its way. We. haven't had one in a. >> long had dreams of earthquake but not. the earthquake but the comedian. >> Yeah, me too. >> Shaking the room. >> It's coming. >> He's just in my room. What are you doing. here? We're earthquake. >> 90 chance of of an earthquake coming. It's coming. >> It's coming. Yeah. And this one's going. to be big. The California one. 6.7 or. larger. >> Yeah. >> Why are you laughing, dude? You're. you're you're a naysayer. >> I'm just saying. >> You're the reason why we have these hot. to look to go to the bathroom. >> Wait, go back.

>> OH, YEAH. OH, YEAH. YEAH. YEAH. DON'T GO. TO THE BATHROOM when we're doing the. earthquake. >> Scout honor. >> Scout honor. >> Look what it's called. >> Yeah. What's it called? >> San Andreas. >> fault. >> And this is your fault. San Andreas. >> Yeah. >> This is why we're in trouble. Cuz of. you. I saw that. I saw it in theaters. >> You saw that? >> Oh, yeah. You saw that? >> Big Rock fan. >> Not the Odyssey, but. >> yeah, >> I I saw it, too. I think. >> The Rock is the man. >> He is a man. >> I'm going to watch whatever he wants. He. says, "Watch this movie. I go see it.". >> I love disaster movies, but we've talked.

about that. >> Moana. I'm You think I'm not seeing. Moana? >> You're going to watch Moana before. [ __ ] the Odyssey? >> I'll do a double feature. >> No, no, no. You're not going to. No. Watch the Odyssey. If you watch Moana. before the Odyssey, I'm going to lose my. [ __ ] mind, dude. >> I will lose it. I will lose it. >> First of all, you have to apply for a. new visa to get to Hawaii. You have to. watch have watched Moana before you go. to Hawaii. You know that. They ask you. questions about Moana. >> I never even saw the cartoon version of. it. >> You're in deep [ __ ] pal. >> Cuz you got to know. And it's not. And. Lilo and Stitch used to count doesn't. anymore. You got to see Moana now. Wow. >> Before you get to any of the islands, they need to know, do you know.

>> plot lines for Moana. >> characters? That's what they ask you at. the border now. >> Okay. Name me a character in Moana. >> Moaso. >> There is no Moana, dude. >> Yeah, dude. >> Yeah. Yeah. Wait, wait. Turn that off. for a second. Name me the charact name. me the different variety of characters. of Moana. >> Okay. Palutes. >> Palutes. >> Palutango. >> Tatango. >> Yeah. Yeah. Moana. >> He's a parakeet. >> Moaso. >> Yeah. Moaso is definitely turtle. >> There's a turtle. There's a talking. coconut. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Anuk is a talking. >> What's the song with the co talking.

coconut? >> No. No. Yeah. Let's do it again. Yeah. >> Every day on the island. I'm a coconut. Yeah. >> Yeah. That's it. >> Famous Moana. Yeah. >> And it's great. There's so many of them. And then when they're in the in the. chorus, I'm a coconut. Yeah. It's. amazing. >> Love that song. >> Yeah. So, that's good. >> What's the story of Moana? >> Well, they But. >> well, do you want. >> Tell me the story. Yeah. I want to know. the deal. I never saw it. >> You should see it. >> Yeah. Yeah. Tell me the story.

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Plus, get 20% off your first six months. when you go to quo.com/badfriends. >> That's quo. Quo.com/badfriends. >> Well, Anuk and Moano, >> they're being pushed off the island. The. island's being gentrified. >> That's the whole story. >> by skims. >> Heavy ski. >> Yeah, it's all ski. >> Skims and holl. And Moana has to kind of. save the day, so to speak, along with. her new band of friends with the frog. and the turtle. >> The frog and turtle. Actually, by the. way, that's a great movie. That's. probably what it is about. We're going.

to go see. It's. >> not about that. >> Yes, it is. >> Gentrification. That's what they're. talking about in Moana. >> It's okay. >> Disney adventure about a brave village. chief's daughter, a magical ocean, and a. stolen goddess heart. And and also. gentrification. >> She lives on a peaceful Polynesian. island called Motuni. >> How do you feel about gentrification? >> More. More. More. More. More. >> Yeah. >> We got to get more, dude. That's How do. you think Carlos is able to live where. he lives? >> Yeah. >> Yeah. jealous. >> near the east side. That was not He. wasn't He did not belong. >> It's so It's so unbelievable. When I. first moved to Silver Lake Echo Park in.

the '9s and what it is now. >> Well, yeah, >> dude. In the '9s, it was like like you. would hear gunshots. >> Not anymore. >> People screaming. And I'm from the. suburbs. I'd just be in my blankets. >> So scary. >> Like that scene in Big when they chat in. the St. James Hotel. Yeah. They hear. people screaming outside. Now they have. uh duck boats. They got duck boats in. the water now down there, right? >> Yeah. Wow. Wow. They cleaned up. There's. an air one there now. >> TV shows are based out of there now. I. love LA. >> Well, it's cool now.

>> Before it was like, "Hey, P, what are. you looking at, bro?". >> Yeah. You get beat up on the. >> Yeah. Yeah. And I'll go, "I'm sorry.". >> Yeah. You get jumped out. >> Sorry I looked at you. >> But I was a survivor. I was not scared. of the MS-13. >> Well, >> I'm not. >> I wouldn't say that. >> Yeah. I Cuz I'll tell you why. MS-13, if. you're looking in the camera right now, >> I'm scared of you. For the record, I'm. scared of you. I'm on your side. >> I'm scared, but I'm safe. >> Oh, don't do hands. >> Yeah, I am. Yeah, >> that's it. Now you're gone. >> Yeah, west side. >> They buy tickets, whatever it is. >> They're cool. I'll do jobs for you.

>> Yeah, we're Yeah. Hey, >> cuz they know that I'm not a I'm not uh. a threat. >> You're not an oppressor. >> No, not it's not about oppressing. >> Yeah. >> What are you talking about? >> Well, he's an oppressor. >> Yeah, you're an oppressor. They would. shoot you the [ __ ] up. >> You go to the neighborhood, they go, "This is. >> Yeah, but for me, I was like a little. guy.". >> And as soon as customer, >> but as soon as you get hair, they're not. going to trust you. >> Yeah. >> No, I'll slick it back. Before they I. thought you were a scientist or. something. >> You're like an engineer. >> Like a meth scientist. >> What's up, dog? Do you do math and [ __ ]. >> No, I let the Mexicans uh tie their or.

lock their bike next to my door. I hook. everyone. >> Their bike. Whose bike was it? >> It's the guy. That's the sing coconut. song again. >> I'm a coconut on the island. It's such a. I love it. Moana. Moana forever, man. >> You're a liar, dude. >> I'm going to watch Moana before I watch. Odyssey. If you do, my heart will break. Here's. two things I know it's going to happen. Okay. No Hawaii. You're not going. Right. And also, you're not going to. watch the audience. >> I'm going to FaceTime you from Moana.

just to bum you out. >> That'd be Well, it's your loss. >> Okay. What if I go to Hawaii, but I. don't go to to your island. If I go to a. different island, does that count? >> No, cuz you're going to do the show with. me on the on the 15th. What What night. at? You have to do a guest spot. >> Saturday the 16th. >> You have to do a guest spot. >> I will do. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> I will do. You're not going, are you? >> I'm going. Everyone listening, if you're. in Hawaii, I'm doing a show. What's it. called? >> Bobby Bobby Lee Live. >> Bobby Lee Live. But what's the what is. the venue? >> Let me go to your website. >> Yeah. Go to my website. >> This will already be out, by the way.

>> I don't know. >> September 12th. No, September. >> 12th. >> 12th. >> Will it be out? This one. >> 100%. >> Yeah. So, >> no, it won't be. >> Yeah. Go watch me at. >> No. >> The Ldale Concert Hall. >> It's a great ad. >> You're leaving early. He's not even. going to be there. Yeah, the 16th is. pushing it. So, I mean, I'll just have. to extend my stay. >> Yeah, if we all go for the 16th, I'll. just stay. >> Yeah, we have to go. >> We have to go. >> By the way, McCon's been ducking. For. people that want to know, McCone's in. London. He just bailed again on this.

show. >> No, he's got to be fired. >> I'm down. I already said it. >> And then you with your dog sick. >> I I've missed one episode in two years. >> Dog sick. Dog sick. Dog sick's valid. >> But is he sick? >> Yeah. >> Interesting. You have paperwork? >> Yeah. Yeah, you have paperwork and video. evidence. If you have a doctor's note, then I'll I'll. >> Send me a photo of Mitch McConnell, too. >> All right. I need. >> If you're going to do it, do diligence, you know. >> Yeah. I'm just getting you a receipt. >> Okay, dude. He's. >> It's a vet. It better not be grooming.

>> Oh, here it is. >> Yeah. What is it? >> It's not grooming. Here's. >> invoice. >> Invoice. Listen. >> Invoice. Zoom out. >> Zoom in. Zoom. >> He's getting a haircut. >> My I I don't groom my. >> You got You got a mohawk. >> You take your dog to Mohawk out. That's. what it's called. >> Yes, that's where I went with my ex. So, I didn't know where else to go. >> It's [ __ ] dude. Just be honest. You. didn't want to come that day. >> That's crazy. I've never No, Andrew. knows I wouldn't [ __ ] do that. I. >> He would never do that. But did. something else come up? >> That's something else came up. >> Something else came up.

>> It's a woman. >> No, >> it's a lady friend. >> involved with some sort of pill. >> Lady pill. >> Yeah, lady pill. Dude. >> Oh, what's funny is those two things did. happen, but days later. >> Okay. >> Your maybe your memory is serving you. wrong. Perhaps it happened on that day. and you think it was 2 days later. >> I would never skip work ever. >> Okay. >> I believe you actually. >> So, is Archie okay? >> Yeah, he's okay now. Thank God. >> And what what was going on? >> He's had a little issue with his anal. glands. >> He put something up there. >> Yeah. >> Sir, what have you been putting in your. dog's butt? Do you wipe your dog's butt. after uh he poops?

>> I do, of course. Yeah. >> But they tell you don't do that because. then they do have trouble with their. anal glands. They're not You. >> I've been doing it wrong. >> They're not supposed to be wiped. Dogs. don't need to be wiped. Don't do that. That's not good. Bobby has put something. in my butt, too. And I didn't. >> Yeah, but that was a Kit Kat bar. >> Kit Kat bars belong there. >> It was a Tic Tac, not Oh, yeah. Tic Tac. >> When you break a KitKat, you eat the. left one and you put the right one in. your ass. >> Okay. [ __ ]. >> That's very obvious. Everybody knows. that. >> Sometimes Almond Joy if you want. If. >> you want to be like, you know, tropical. >> I can't believe you thought I've been.

lying for two weeks. >> Yeah, I think you're a liar. >> No, he did. He told me the truth. I text. him. I wanted to make sure the dog was. okay. >> I love Archie. I never met him. >> Have I met Archie? No, you haven't met. Archie. >> I've never met Archie. >> When you look at the dog in the eyes. when it gets back from when you go to. pick them up, man, they hate being there. so much. The smell, the smell gives. them, it's like us walking into a morg. You know what I mean? Like you walk, you'd be like, "Oh god." It's like this. like dense dead air with like. formaldahhide. When you walk into a. funeral home, >> I'm sure dogs smell that. Like my dog,

there was a groomer, a mobile groomer in. the neighborhood and she walked near it. and then she like looked up at the van. and then like slowly backed away. >> Oh my god. They know. They know. something. They [ __ ] know what's up. They know what's up, dude. Their senses. are way up, dude. >> Yeah. >> How do you feel about Death Cap for. Cutie? >> It's okay. >> They're not bad. >> They're not bad. Yeah. Throw me some. names. I I'll tell you. >> I'm going to see them on Sunday. >> Well, you know them. >> No. >> Backstage. >> Bought a ticket. >> There's no way. >> Swear to God. I'll show you the ticket. man. I literally bought it an hour ago. >> Wow. >> Haven't been to the Greek in in maybe.

two years, three years. >> Good tickets and like a good seats. >> No no nose bleeds. >> Okay. >> I just bought tickets. >> My favorite show. My my favorite show at. the Greek was this when the Pixies. reunited. >> This is many many years ago. And when. they came out, this is before I knew. Joey Santiago. >> Mhm. >> And I [ __ ] cried like a baby. >> Pixies are are the. >> Cuz you never thought that they would. get get back together. It's like if the. talking heads ever got back together. >> Never. >> I would. They would never.

>> Never. >> But if they're still alive. >> I know. But they will never. >> I know. Because of. >> Yeah. Oh man. >> Yeah. >> Trouble. Trouble on the high seas. >> Yeah. It's always a lead singer of. whatever. Like Morrisy and the Smiths, >> but get the Smiths back together. >> No chance. Never will. >> I know, but how great would that be? >> I know, but that's also a part of it's. got to be like. >> that's a Coachella headlining [ __ ]. show. >> No, don't do Coachella. Do like a p do. >> a private showing. >> Well, do like the Palladium or something. with them. Do something more intimate. That's their venue. >> Yeah, >> Coachella. >> Okay. >> It's just too much. It's too much.

fodder. >> It's too much. You imagine imagine if. the imagine if the Smiths went didn't. Coachell and they did what Bieber did. They were on their computer talking. about old stuff that they used to love. >> I don't think the kids would resonate. with the kids. >> It would not hit. Yeah. >> Not with the. >> I don't even think that the talking. heads would resonate with the kids even. if they got back together. >> I don't think they would headline. >> No headline. No. Not now. Not. >> Not now. Yeah. >> They're not big enough. I don't know if. the kids know. >> Yeah. I don't think they know. >> A lot of the kids in the comments are. going to say, "We absolutely do and we. know. >> They're that good. They're that. >> like the Smiths I think could headline.

I don't think so. >> No, man. That's such a hard That's hard. You got They got to sell like a huge. internet. It's got to be like Bad Bunny, you know what I mean? It's got to be. like someone that crosses every genre of. age range and gender and. >> the Smith would be. >> Even when the Strokes played, they were. kind of bummed that Bieber was. headlining. >> Yeah. >> Well, how can you? It's like, >> what do you mean. >> that? But because it's like that's you. and it's like you and me getting bummed. that like Chappelle is at a venue. nearby. You're like, "What are you going. to What are you going to do? We're not. going to have. >> Yeah, I'm Here's the thing. For me, I'm.

okay with people rising. >> You are. You are. >> I re I really am. Yeah. I've It's like. when somebody rises, like when the Matt. Refe thing happened, >> I was like, I'm so happy for him. You. know, >> 100%. >> You become friends with them. >> Here's my problem with. >> Say that again in the mic. >> You become friends with them real quick. >> [ __ ] off. >> You said that on the show. >> It's true, but [ __ ] off. >> Okay. >> Okay. >> You know what? I would like to check the. tape on this the these shows and see. who's been more combative lately. Is it. me to you or him to you? It's him for. sure. >> It is to lately him.

>> There's a grudge or a gripe or something. with you and him lately. >> Oh yeah way. >> There's a non-aring aspect. >> And he's gotten quieter. The Spaniard's. gotten quieter. >> You've been quieter, dude. >> To balance. >> No. >> No. You're not You're not You're not. >> You're not revealing what's going on in. your world. >> You're Yang, not Ying. >> Yeah. >> To be honest, Bobby, you're Yang for. sure. >> I'm Yang. Yeah. Yeah. You're more. >> What's going on in your world that. you're being really quiet lately? >> Yeah. Why? Why the Yang? >> Why? Why you been yin yin? >> Yeah,

>> I'm just. >> Don't look at me. Look at Yang. >> Because Bob is so attacked, I'm trying. to just shift focus towards you. >> You should be a politician. You're so. good at [ __ ] He's so good at like. lying his way out of. >> both of you. >> Good [ __ ]. >> You're more of a P Ken Paxton kind of. >> such a specific reference. >> Yeah. >> I mean, he is kind of like corrupt has. side. >> Yeah, that's what I'm saying. You would. have a deep corruption, but you'd have. the support for the men. >> I would have side girls in travel. Yeah. >> Insane. That's insane.

>> Ted Cruz. >> Only private jets, though. Yeah. >> You'd be flying private jets. >> paid for by. >> by by tax dollars. Yeah. >> Yeah. >> It's incredible. >> What's going on, Ying? >> What is going on? >> Why does someone attack you anymore? I'm. trying to focus on Andrew. >> Yeah. Rip into me, dude. I deserve it. >> More difficult. >> Rip into me right now. Rip into me. I. deserve it. >> I don't think you do. Okay. >> But I'm curious to know why something. something's bubbling with Andreas. lately. We're going to find out later. >> Yeah. Nothing. >> I know what it is. M. >> I can't we can't talk about it here. >> Oh, >> he's playing the middle. And when you. play the middle, when you play the.

middle, dude, you play the middle, there's no allegiance. >> That's exactly right. >> Right. >> Yeah. You get squashed when you are in. the middle. >> No, you're not going to get squashed. because you're playing a middle, right, to juggernauts. >> Y. >> Yeah. And little people. >> That's right. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> So, you know, where's your allegiance? Be smart and tactical. >> with a juggernaut. You got to lean. toward the journal. I. >> don't believe you at all. >> I don't believe it. Yeah. >> It's You're so bad. >> Yeah. You're in the middle. >> with the little people.

>> Yeah. And that's why we're reacting to. you this way. >> That's exactly right. >> Don't you think? >> Yes. Our we're feeding off of what you. >> Yeah. Where is your allegiance? >> Where is your allegiance, dude? >> Yeah. >> Because I'm not sure. >> Yeah. You jump ship at any moment. >> He would. And you do you want to show. your allegiance to us? I would get a bad. friend's tattoo. >> In fact, I'm I'm going to get one. >> I think we should. And you. >> we should all get a bad friends tattoo, right? See where your allegiance is. >> No needles. >> No needles. >> No needles. >> No needles.

>> Yeah. Yeah. >> Wow. >> Let's just get just get a henna one. That's fine. >> Get a henna. >> Yeah, but the hennas last forever. >> Would you get one? >> Yeah, of course. >> I know you would. >> The hennas last. Remember Esther got one. of those hennas and it lasted? >> Yeah, I got them too and it just went. away this year and it was seven years. ago. >> Seven years? >> Yeah, maybe. >> Which what was your What did yours say? >> The state of Texas. And then I got the. Nike check right here. Oh, I remember. the Nike check. It's totally gone. >> Yeah. >> I don't buy it. >> I don't know where I'm going to get it. >> On your shoulder. >> No, no. I got to get maybe here and.

little. >> What about your other form? The other. arm is wide open. >> Yeah. Yeah. But just a little one here. >> Just that says Bad Friends. >> I'll do that Bad Friends logo probably. >> Oh, that one's good. You know what? Whatever. >> I'm a coconut from the island. >> Go see Moana in theaters now. Yeah. >> When is there going to be a new rock. though? Who's the next big cool guy? There's got to be a new guy. >> What are you looking at him for? You. think he's the Hollywood Reporter or. something? >> Yeah, >> I'm the guy with the computer. >> He's guy with the computer. There's got. to be a new rock. There's got to be a.

new hot big. >> It's that guy that's in the black stars. What's his name? >> Oh, and Jacob Allerty. >> Yeah, Jacob Allerty. >> Oh, >> he's big. >> Put on some mass. >> He just doesn't have the He doesn't. Yeah. >> He's cute. >> Yeah, he's a handsome. >> Zoom in on him. The the Yeah. Really? >> Already a movie star, >> dude. Look at him. He's tall, >> but he's not jacked. >> He's dating Kendall Jenner, though, >> huh? >> He's dating Kendall Jenner. They do. Stock is. >> They all do. >> He's dating Kendall Jenner. >> Yeah. So, stocks through the roof, >> dude. I want to date a Kardashian.

>> Rob, >> which one's available, >> Rob? >> There's a It's too late, right? >> There's a brother with that small spine. syndrome that they've got. >> Do they really have one? >> Yeah, they don't show. That's my Isn't. there another sister that isn't on. camera? Isn't that true? Isn't there. like another one that doesn't? >> I thought there was a brother that is. not on camera. >> Yeah, maybe there's that. Maybe. somebody's not in the family. Yeah, >> it was kind of like the same thing with. the Osborne, right? Didn't the Osbornes. have another kid that was never on. camera? >> The daughter. >> The daughter. Yeah, >> she refused, right? >> She's Yeah, she's not involved. That's.

the one I've never met. >> cuz she's She doesn't want to be in that. world. Not interested. >> I find Well, I told you about my um. experience with her, the mother. What's. her name? >> Sharon. >> Sharon Osborne. We already talked about. that. No one drank your beers. That's. one of my favorite clip. >> Did I tell you Did I tell you what. happened? No. >> Someone drank my be. >> Dude, I love he blamed the whole house. >> So, I'm backstage, right? Theo's. backstage at the main room. >> He goes, "Hey, man." I go, "What's up?". He goes, "The Osbbors are here, man.". Oh, wow. >> You got to go say hi. >> Got it.

>> So, I did I did my Osborne joke, right? My I I joke. >> Mhm. >> Yeah. >> Right. And then I I go back there and I. I shake Jack. I hug Jack. >> Mhm. >> And then I touch Sharon in the shoulder. I go, "I'm such a big fan." I don't know. why I said that. And she does this. >> Did you say, "I'm sorry for your loss.". >> No, I didn't. >> Would have been a good lead. >> I don't know. It's too late. >> No, I think that one last.

>> It happened the week before that I would. say it. >> I don't think so. >> I think. >> How long is that window open. >> for Azie Osborne? FOREVER. >> OH, [ __ ]. >> HE'S Aussie Osborne. I should have said. sorry for your loss. >> Yeah, >> he was a he was a hero of mine. You. >> But I also saying saying I'm a big fan. is still good. >> She doesn't care about that. >> And she went like this. She went. >> Yeah, that's what you deserved. I'm on. her side. >> Are you being real? >> I'm on her side. I would have shut her. down. >> This could have been a good thing. though. >> My husband was a legend. She You should.

have said something. >> Oh, [ __ ]. >> Thanks to your husband for shaping my. childhood. >> And because of that reaction, then Theo. goes, "They're coming backstage. I left. back the back door. Yeah. Yeah. Because I didn't want. another, you know what I mean? >> The coward's door. The coward's door. >> Dude, you've you've gone through the. coward's door. >> I do. I do the coward door all the time. When I bomb [ __ ] I'm always like going. through the coward door. Don't want to. say hi to anybody. >> I love the coward door. It's my favorite. exit. >> So, if everyone knows, right, the main. room, there's three ways to exit it. >> Right.

>> Okay. >> Right. >> There's through the cover booth. >> Mhm. >> Right. >> Yeah. >> There's through the crowd. >> Right. And there's through the coward's. way. >> The coward's way. >> Yeah. And that's where like our senu. hall goes through. >> Not because he's a coward. >> Not that because he's a coward. It's. just because he want he doesn't want. >> he doesn't want the thing. >> The thing, right? I always walk in. through the audience. >> You have to. >> Right. >> They go Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Cuz I I. like the talk. >> Yeah. You heard the chatter. >> I hear people You know what I mean? And. then I There's some people that go, "Did. they do a sharing?". >> They do sharing you.

>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They sharing me. Yeah. >> Sharing sharing you. >> So when you have a good set, right, you. walk out through the crowd. >> 100%. Right. When you have a bad set, you go through the either the cover. booth or the coward's way. >> And when you have it and then you have. when you're really uncomfortable, you. sneak out through the bar, the bar door, the backside bar door. >> Can you get out that way? >> Mhm. I found a way. You have to climb up. the hill. But. >> you get dirty, but you could do it. I've. done it. >> But did you know that new You know what. they're going to do? >> What? Make a patio out there?

>> No. That's what they're This is what. they're doing. They're going, their next. project is through the bar. >> Mity's bar. What? Ceros. >> to the main room. >> To the main room. >> That's genius. That's needs to happen. >> That's going to happen. >> Yeah. Because because otherwise you. can't get back there. >> Yeah. >> For people that don't know, that's it. used to be called a video room back when. we were young lads. Now they made it a. bar for comics. >> Yeah. It's beautiful. >> But co shut it down. They couldn't have. it back there. >> and then they reopened it again. >> It's be Have you seen the new design? >> It's stunning. >> It's stunning. >> Yeah, they did a great job. Yeah.

Anyway, >> is there any way we could turn on the. air? >> Yeah, it's like a switch on. >> It's a sauna in here. >> Yeah, this is a new big thing in the. world. The the no AC, dude. I my AC. kicked out last night and I was like rut. row row. >> Had the guy come today to help fix it. >> Yeah, I I have fans. I have emergency. fans stalked. >> I have fans and AC. I'm I still sweat at. night. >> Yeah, I have fans AC and a man with a. [ __ ] fan. >> You have fan mail. >> All right. That fan double. Yeah. Triple.

you. That's me. >> Yeah. Yeah. Carlos comes over and fans. my face. >> Yeah. >> You would. >> with air conditioning and fans going. >> It's so hot. >> Yeah. >> It's been. >> It's so hot. >> I know. Kind of makes you. >> And it's worse in other areas. I get it. Right. But it's like I don't like it. >> It's way worse. It's like 120 in Phoenix. right now. >> Oh my Yeah. I tell my mom every night. I. go, "Don't go outside. >> Don't leave the house. >> She's in the desert.". >> Yeah. >> Why are you laughing? My mom could have. a heat stroke. Death Valley is at 134. right now,

>> dude. Imagine. I didn't know what that. is. >> Shaka. >> Shaka. >> Shaka dog. >> Yeah. >> Luke Desert in Iran and Kuwait in the. Middle East reach we reach what? 115. What? No. No. No. Luke Desert gets up to. 159. How's that even real? >> Nothing's there. >> Yeah. Nothing's there. >> Desert. Oh my god. In Iran, >> they have war and missiles and hot. >> My god. >> Wow. >> We would kill them with Kill them with. wind. >> Huh? What? >> And they still win. >> They're still winning. >> Still winning? >> Yeah.

>> We'll We'll shift it. >> Nope. >> No. No. I I I I'm still on team USA. >> Not me. I'm I'm reading I'm reading. Iranian books right now. Trying to. learn, man. >> Yeah. >> I'm trying. >> My China's helping them. It's crazy. >> Yeah. Yeah. 100%. It's getting bad. >> And what are we going to do about it? >> Nothing. >> Dang it. >> Nothing. >> Nothing. I I'll vote. >> No. >> Yes. I'll vote. I'll vote. >> You won't vote though. >> What? >> You don't vote though? Yeah, but I I. contribute to John Oav and Telerico. >> Oh, that's right. >> That's so funny. He'll give, but he.

won't vote. >> because THEY'RE NOT EVEN MY DISTRICT. >> THEY WANT YOUR OKAY. >> YEAH, that's true. You can't. >> It doesn't make a difference. >> They're not in my district. >> That's my point. It's not. >> We have to balance like you're [ __ ]. You think you're the balance. You're not. right. But we have to have a [ __ ]. balance. >> All this all this No, you're not. >> I think all this heat is I think all. this heat is Manny. I think it's his. fault. >> It maybe. >> got to be mommy. >> I'm not going to go there. >> I'm going to blame it on Mi. >> Yeah. Socialists, >> they caused this heat rise. Yeah. No, >> it's because of them that we go up. >> Listen, I think it's this. I think it's.

um. >> be a good socialist. Give everyone heat. I don't want any more of this. >> It's global warming deniialists. >> over the years, these [ __ ] huge. companies. And you know, I mean, now. we're at this place where it's like. there's no going back. >> I don't believe in it. I'm going to play. devil's advocate. I don't believe it. >> Okay. >> It's not real. >> All right. Because at some point, right, it there's no way of going back and then. what are we going to do? >> I think we die. That was the plan. >> Yeah, but what about the our children? >> We don't have kids. >> Yeah, that's right. That's right.

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foothills of Tennessee created a flavor. that you know exactly what it is. >> Couple of brothers, right? >> Huh? >> Couple of brothers created. >> Couple of brothers, my friend. >> And that's there's nothing better than. brotherly love. >> Brotherly love is what made Mountain Dew. so good. Enjoy it all the time. No. matter what time of year or no matter. where you are, >> wherever you are. Tasting great since. 48. You have it at your barbecue. You. have it on the couch watching the game. with friends, hanging out on the go in. the morning. Whatever you do, do the dew. because it's been tasting great since. 48. Enjoy the refreshing citrus kick to. Mountain Dew. An American original.

>> Look, look for Mountain Dew in stores. near you. >> Tasting great since 48. >> Let me ask you this. I I saw a video the. other day of um. >> a married couple up into late 90s and. then they're both in the hospital. No, no, the the. So, this isn't the right just let me. finish. Can I just get I get it out? Right. The female the you know. >> dies and the and the husband dies.

immediately after. >> but in the reverse. >> that doesn't happen. The female lives. >> longer. >> Why is that? >> Because they're free. >> I know. But why? If I Okay, if I had if. I married my girlfriend, right, and she. dies, I'm not going to die immediately. after. >> You might. >> I don't think I would. >> We die statistically before them and. then they live long healthy. >> I I know, but I think I would be like, "Hey, I could get on the dating apps.". >> No.

>> Yeah. Get on Rya again. >> No, God wouldn't let you. He'd be gone. You'll get in wrinkle by them. >> What? What' you say? >> The dating app wrinkle. >> Yeah. So, >> I don't care. Yeah, that's a good Yeah, I get on that dating app. >> Wrinkles is so good. >> Wrinkles is so good. >> I'm on sciatica. >> What? That's so good. Wrinkles the app. >> Yeah. >> No, you wouldn't want to go back to the. apps. See, if you were ever single, you'd never go back to the apps. You. hated them when you [ __ ] did them. >> I know. But I would get on some sort of.

old like what's the old people dating. app? There's an old people dating app. >> Squatting and smoking. >> Ria, is that it? >> No, no, no. There's a old people diet. dating app. >> Oh, Plenty of Fish. Isn't that it? >> That's No, that's for everybody. >> Our time. Oh, >> our time. >> Silver singles. >> Our time. >> Go on silver singles right now. I want. to see what that looks like. Yeah, >> that's all silver. >> I want to see what the women look like. >> Qualify now, Bob. >> What's the age? >> It says 50. >> Over 50. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> That Look at the photo. >> Yeah. Safe, simple, silver singles.

>> Yeah. No way. >> Boop. >> I wouldn't get I. That's a That's a boop. That's for. >> That's foreplay. Boop. >> Yeah. >> Boop. You boop. A nose boop. That's how. they hook up now. >> Yeah. Wow. >> They do. Ask them kissing. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> They're nasty. Kiss. They're dirty. birds. >> Yeah. Obviously, seeking arrangements is. the one you want. >> I'd have to know where my dick's at. Well, you know exact. It should be the.

same. No, >> should be where YOU LEFT OFF. HOPEFULLY. YOUR LEG I KNOW THE LOCATION OF IT NOW. That's what No, just put tag on that. thing and you'll know where it is. >> The condition of where it's at. >> It's in perfect condition. >> I know. But when I when I'm 80 is what. I'm saying. Like at 80, will I have. sexual desire? Will I want you? I mean, I'd have to know. I check in. >> I would assume. >> I don't think so. I think it dies at 70. for men. Look it. Look it up. >> This what you get. Blue chew gold. Yeah, it's the. >> blue silver for him.

>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Wait, but I'm gonna ask you guys all a. question. This is a good I was taking a. piss on the in the airplane and I looked. down at my wiener. Your wiener changes. as you get older. It look it gets. different looks at it, you know, like it. >> mine looks like a hammerhead right now. >> Yeah. Like that the the. >> helmet is. >> the helmet is like much wider. >> Look at that. Yeah. Sexual desire remain. active be 70 beyond. Have your penises. changed in the last like 10 years? Have. you noticed a change in the wiener? When. I look at mine, it looks a little. different. >> What does yours look like? I told you. mine looks like a hammerhead. >> Why, sir?

>> My dick looks a little Yeah. Like when. I'm pissing, it goes like this. Oh god, my back is killing me. >> No, >> hold my balls. >> Mine's philos philosophical. >> Oh, it's. >> I think therefore I am. >> That's what my penis says. >> Size and shape. Yeah. No, not size. It. just looks a little different now. >> Yeah, the appearance. You can. >> Has a color change? What are you talking. about? >> A little. >> It's gray. >> Blue. >> Oh, that's not good. Should I untie that. thing? >> It's not breathing. It's not breathing, dude. >> Yeah. >> Is it blue?

>> It's bright blue. >> That's not good, dude. You got to go to. the hospital then. All right, I'll go. >> What? >> It's I got smurfed it. >> Papa smurfed it. >> Wow. >> The amount of times, too, when I was. >> Fire crotch. That was all when I was a. kid. Fire crotch. Yeah, >> fire crotch was a big. >> It is red. >> Yeah. No, the the skin itself is bright. white. >> Yeah. >> Never seen. >> But it's very good. >> It's a fine fine. It's in fine. condition. I don't believe it's bright. bright blue right now. >> No, it's not. But it's just changed a. little. Maybe it looked different to the. window. >> Yeah. >> As I peed in the bathroom. When you pee.

on a plane, >> you don't put the seat up. You just pee. >> No, I do. >> I You just pee. >> I do. >> You just pee all. >> I just [ __ ] everywhere. I [ __ ]. everywhere. I [ __ ] everywhere. Yeah. You. know what I had to do the other day for. the first time is hook it. >> What? >> I had to hook it. >> What do you mean? >> What do you think I mean? >> Pull it out the side hook. >> No. No. I had to stick my finger and. hook it. Why? Because there was I I'm tired of. like, you know what I mean? My my. [ __ ] as a clip. Yeah. It clipping.

Don't clip it. >> Get it all out, right? But it clips at. the end, right? And I hook it. It's. >> crazy, dude. >> No, I don't. I'm sorry. I'm hooking it. I'm digging it out. Why doesn't. >> It's a new Tom Cruz movie. I'm Digger. >> That's Digger. >> Yeah. >> Tom Cruz's movie. >> Yeah. Yeah. I'm Digger. >> Okay. You don't dig it? >> And never ever. >> Oh, I dig it. >> And you know, I Googled it. Hot chicks. do it. >> Mhm. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Are you a hot chick?

>> And you? >> Yeah. Hot chicks and me do it. >> They don't. Do Do hot chicks clip and. dig? >> Do hot chicks clip and dig? >> Yeah. >> I will say this. I have to admit I did. it like four months ago. >> Exactly. Thank you so much. It's I clip. every time. >> Why were you having trouble? >> Mhm. >> Yeah, me too. I was having I was tired. of it. >> Fiber. >> Yeah, we got to eat more fiber, bud. >> I eat beans. But you want to take Metam Mucil. >> Yeah, I tried I've tried all of that and. it just it just hardens in there. >> Nothing like the hood. >> It's like my poo looked at Medusa.

>> Frozen. >> Back to the Iliad. >> Yeah. Yeah. That Nolan do that. >> Put that in the movie. >> Yeah, put that in the movie. >> Yeah. >> Free poop. >> You've never clipped. >> Never touched it. >> Okay. >> Not interested in it. >> But then you wash your hands. ferociously. >> You must. >> You must and always. So that's why you. have shiny nails. >> Yeah. >> Nothing sticks to those. It's like a. It's like a top coat. >> Yeah. >> You're going to stop doing that at some. point. Yeah. Painting your nails. >> Why? >> I'm sick of it.

>> I don't like it. >> Why? >> I don't know why. It's like too shiny. >> Yeah, maybe. >> I I think some Well, are you still doing. your toes? >> Oh, yeah. For sure. >> Yeah, for sure. I have. >> Does your girlfriend paint your toes. ever? >> No. >> She'll never You'll never let. >> We go to a pro. >> You got to go to Armenians. >> What do you mean? She's been doing her. whole life, though. Girls have been. painting their nails their whole lives. >> I don't because I I have to admit. something out loud. One of the toes I. have to go to the hospital. >> You have like You have like gang green. on it. >> No, not gang green. No, it's just it's.

just. >> gang yellow. >> I banged it against uh You know what I. mean? A bed post. >> I've done that a thousand times. >> Right. It turned black. >> The nail fell off. >> That's gang It's gang green. >> No. And it's not gang green, dude. It's. not green. >> Gang black. >> It's gang green. Yeah, it's gang black. Yeah. Yeah. And I had to now I have a. artificial one, a plastic one that I. have to keep super gluing on. >> You have a fake toe? >> Yeah. >> Subnol hematoma. Collection of blood. trapped underneath the toenail caused by. trauma. >> So I got Yeah. I got to go to the. hospital and go to my doctor and go,

"What the [ __ ] is going on here?". >> They're going to go, "What's going on? You should have come in four months ago. when it started changing color. You now. you you might get the toe amputated.". >> I don't care about it. >> You don't like the big It's the big toe. >> Well, I my You know what my doctor said? I already talked about Did I talk about. this? What my dentist said? >> No. How about your toe? >> Yeah, I have gingivitis down there. >> What did he say? >> My My dentist said 6 months ago, you got.

to get them all removed. >> Your every. >> every tooth. >> You're going to get veneers? >> No, I'm going to get dentures first. >> No. >> Yeah, I'm going to have fake ones. >> Let me see which one. Why? They're all. falling out. >> How many are fake now? >> There's none fake. But he's like, "You. got to get them all removed because. they're all sick.". >> Oh. >> So, at one point in a year or two, I'm. going to be coming in here with like, you know what I mean? Poor gums. >> Pure gums. >> What is that? Are you not brushing ever? >> No. I'm so brushing. >> Too brushy. >> I'm No. Right now, if I did what I did.

now, what I in my 20s, I would have all. my teeth. >> Damn. >> I floss. You know what I mean? A little. bit of hydrogen peroxide. I brush twice. I get into all of it. >> But they're dead. >> They're dead. >> He just cleaning dead bodies. He died. He was cleaning the dead bodies. Yeah. >> You got to let him go. >> It's like that world in the Odyssey. >> Remember when. >> Hades? >> No. Where where uh Elliot Paige comes. alive? >> Yeah. >> Hell. >> Wait, that was in Moana. >> That scene in Moana. No, you know what?

The reason I bought those tickets to the. show is cuz I, you know, like I like. Death Cap. I haven't I haven't really. been a like a hardcore fan, but that's. how I go to shows now. It's a last. second. I see it. I'm I'll buy it. Done. Fine. the Greek. I go, "Yeah, I'm going. to go to the Greek.". >> I'll see a band I haven't seen in a long. time. I seen them live years ago. I like. them. I'm going to go see it. >> I did the Stardew Valley concert there. >> at the Greek. >> with the LA Phil Harmonic. >> No, I don't know what the the but it was. beautiful. >> That's incredible. If they played that. >> and I went backstage to say hi to Eric.

>> Oh, that's so cool. >> Right. And then he did a speech. He. mentioned my name on stage. It got kind. of applause. >> some. >> It was like half applause, half nothing. >> You're a Stardew Valley legend at this. point. You've talked about it so much. There's no way they don't. >> Yeah, but it was a beautiful experience. >> It wasn't with them, but. >> it was really beautiful. >> That's last time I was at the Greek. >> The Greek is the Greek to me is leaps. and bounds better than the bowl. >> Yes. >> I've never been to the bowl. >> Oh, never been to the ball. >> Bring the bowl schedule right now. I'm.

not going to the ball. Wait, you know, because Highland is always trafficked, >> but the bowl does something that is. amazing with the movies with the music. live. >> It's incredible with the LA Phil. Harmonic. They play movies live. >> I'M NOT GOING TO THE BOWL EVER. OKAY. UH, the fireworks special with. Taekovski. That's No. No. >> Give me a good show. I'll go. >> Zezy Top. >> No. >> Counting Crows. >> No. >> How to Train Your Dragon in Concert? >> No. >> John Melanchamp? >> No. >> Santana. Al Green. Al Green. >> He's still alive. >> No. It's a It's an AI. >> Oh. >> Top Gun Maverick in concert.

>> Never. >> What? >> Yeah. There's nothing there that I'm. going to be like, "Oh, I'll go to the. bowl.". >> Carlos, would you guys go see Top Gun. with me? I'll go. >> I go every every. >> It's so good. >> Oh my god. You're so gay, dude. No, >> keep going. >> Smooth summer jazz. >> That's going to be so good. >> Look, this is for. >> use Portugal the man. >> Go, go, this is for Bobby. >> Which one? >> Amadeos. >> I would maybe do Amadeos. >> I would do that in concert. >> Yeah, >> I'm I would definitely do that. >> And the John Williams every year. >> Yeah, every single year. John Williams. every year. He does like three week. three. >> John Williams Melanchap. Who is it?

>> John Williams the composer. >> I love him. >> Orville PC. I love Orville Pek. >> Okay, enough. >> Hold on. Go down. I want to see there's. one that's going to hit you hard. >> Jose Gonzalez is great. >> Yeah. Yeah. Jose Gonzalez. Yeah. >> Sound of music. I'd go. >> Yeah. And there's a sing along. You you. know all the songs. >> like Empire. are alive with the sound of music. >> I'm a COCONUT ON THE ISLAND. I'M A. COCONUT on a dear a female dear ray of.

golden sun. Me a name I call myself far. A long long way to run. Wang, my friend. from the corner store. >> Yeah, Demetrius, my drug dealer. >> Yeah, we should all go together to one. of this. >> I do. I completely agree. >> Someone would have to pick me up. >> Well, you know, we know Portugal the. man. We could go see that show. >> Here's the only way I would do the. [ __ ] bowl. >> with me. >> Talking Heads reunion. >> They're not there. >> The Smith's reunion.

>> They're not there. >> I know. I'm just saying these are the. only scenarios. >> Give me more reunions. >> Uh, >> high school reunion. What if they do. that? What if they do your high school. reunion there? Would you go? >> Yeah. Um, >> you never went to one high school. reunion, did you? >> No. I was never invited. >> No, it's not. >> They sent some. >> They sent a thing out to everybody. >> I never was invited. >> Did you ever go, Carlos? >> No. >> Have you gone? >> No. >> Yeah. >> I just I just didn't It's a far way to. It's a far far way to run. >> Run. >> I just didn't I couldn't.

>> see some people I haven't talked to a. long time. >> I don't know, dude. Another drink for. fun. Go away out the coward's door. Rush. Oh, Rush is coming back. Creed. Triumph in. Alabama shake. >> The Domer. What's his name? >> Dmer. Jeffrey Dmer. >> No, no, no. The the famous drummer. Um, what's his name? >> John Bonham. >> Not John Bonham. >> Oh, from Rush. >> Yeah. What's his name? >> Oh, legend. >> Yeah. >> Oh, yeah. [ __ ] uh uh Neil Per. >> Yeah, Neil Per. He's gone.

>> But now they have Ana. >> It doesn't matter. Neil Per is gone. It's not the same. It's like, you know. what I mean? Kim Deal leaving the. Pixies. It's not the same. >> But they got a babe drummer now. She She. rips. >> I don't care. >> She rips. >> It's like that Filipino dude or whatever. singing uh for Journey or whatever. I. I'm not going to do it. It's It's like, you know, >> The Grateful Dead. It's like. >> Love the Dead. >> I know, but it's like it's the same. >> Of course, it's not the exact same, but. they're. >> I want the same. >> Can't be, brother. >> Please. >> The those day the days are gone. >> Yeah.

>> You can't go back in that AI Instagram '. 90s video. It's over. It's all fake. None of it's real. Backstreet Boys, we. go see them. >> I'm not going to see any of it. >> Yeah. >> And Eagles are back again at the Sphere. Metallica, who I've seen here at Sofi, who's still [ __ ] kill. >> But look at that. October to March. They. booked so many tickets. >> Yeah, it's Metallica. >> Crazy. >> It's [ __ ] Metallica. >> Yeah, just watch it online, man. >> N The Sphere you've never even been to? >> I've never I won't do The Sphere either. >> It boggles your [ __ ] mind. It's one. of the coolest live shows I've ever seen. in my life. And he went to go see What'd. you go see? You went to go see the. movie.

>> What movie? >> When we were in Vegas. >> Yeah. I'd watch the Odyssey at the. Sphere. >> I bet that'd be incredible. >> That would be incredible. >> It's one of the coolest tech. >> Yeah, I would watch. Okay, if the. Odyssey ever plays the Sphere, I'll go. >> But they don't they they only do like. classic movies there now. They're not. doing like new. >> the process to make them like that. >> It's crazy. >> Oh, [ __ ] the process. >> Trust it. >> Just do it. >> I mean, look at how it's it's it is a. cinematic masterpiece with music. >> We should do Bad Friends Live there. >> We'd sell 90 seats. >> 90 100. We'll get 100. Genuinely, it's.

it you know how much the tickets go for. for these [ __ ] shows? >> Yeah. >> They're like $600 for like regular. seats. It's a ripoff. >> Yeah, >> it's chaos. >> That's a sphere. >> That's the sphere, dude. It's a massive. screen. >> Oh my god. I'd love to go. That I'll go. because of screen. >> So cool. >> I love screens. >> You're a big screen guy. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> They'll Let's see if they'll put Stardw. Valley up there for him to play. pre-show. >> Imagine. >> That'd be so fun, >> dude. Imagine playing video games War. Zone on that screen. >> I guarantee you in the future they're. going to have video game competitions in. there for sure. It's prime for that.

>> There's Shamlay on top of it. He was. promoting Marty Supreme. >> Wow. >> What? >> He went on top of it to promote the. movie last year. >> This was some executive's idea and then. they were like, "What does that have to. do with anything?" They're like, "Just. put them up there.". >> Yeah. >> And it's Oh, can I tell you can I tell. you something about this? >> Yeah. >> I It's just something I wanted to talk. Maybe I'll say that. >> No, tell me. >> Um, it's something that I would like to. admit right now from my heart and this. is true. >> True. >> I call.

White people. >> hi. >> are the best. >> He finally came around. >> The dark wizard. I saw it. >> The dark wizard and it made you. >> respect the whites. >> Yeah. >> Thank you. >> Neil Potter. >> Thank you, man. >> Is that his name? >> Finally getting recognition. >> Dean Potter. Dean Potter. >> You know what it's about, dude? >> It's Dean Potter and Alex Hunnel's war. >> Oh, between the two free solo guys. >> Well, Dean Potter was, you know, old. school. >> Mhm. And when P and when Alex Hunnel. came on the scene, there was a.

competition. >> I love that. >> And they were doing extreme [ __ ] dude. >> And when you guys go extreme, you go. extreme. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. You won't see an Asian up there. >> No. >> Yeah. >> Black guys. >> You won't see a black guy up there. >> I ain't going up that [ __ ]. >> Why are you free souling every I love. it. >> It's great. >> Yeah. >> When the whites go crazy, we go. >> You guys go ultimate and you can. understand the wars. >> See? See, >> see you f He finally gets it forever. >> I know. I I know you guys I I it took me.

a long time to even admit it. >> But it's worth watching. >> It's worth watching because any. minorities out there. >> You guys got to get more extreme. >> No. What? Because when you see this. these documentaries, right, you'll know. to stay away from them. >> to the whites. >> Yes. You're too extreme for me, bud. >> I don't do that [ __ ]. >> Yeah, you do, dude. Your schedule is. extreme. >> That is true. >> I'm in Scotland. You know what I It's. extreme behavior. >> Wait till next month. >> Yeah. >> You're going to Australia. You're going. down where the whites are. >> Yeah. And I don't want to go.

>> Yeah, you do. >> Yeah. You want to go? I don't want to. go. I I love performing for the fans. >> I love seeing the fans. It's just going. there. >> The flight. >> Yeah. >> You'll You'll fall asleep. You don't. even know what happened. >> Yeah. I'm sweating right now. >> I'm sweating my balls off. >> My balls off. Like everything is like. humid in here. >> It's become unbearable. >> Unbearable. Intolerable. >> It's Yeah. And you know what? >> Yeah. >> Thank you, Whites. Thank you, Whites. >> Thank you, Whites, for being bad. friends. Thank you, Whites. >> Thank you for being a bad friend. >> Whites.

down.