Sneaky Goosh & Lazy Alono in Cancún | Ep 90 | Bad Friends
from the bad Friends. [Music]. [Applause]. [Music]. [Applause]. Podcast thank you so much so um this guy. right here Andrew Santino give him a. round of applause oh thanks man thanks. he's a piece of. [ __ ] all right he's ugly but anyway I.
know he's not he's hot as [ __ ] okay all. right I've sucked his dick three times. all right all right so um it's delicious. so my point is is that we didn't know. what song it was and we went in the. woods over there is there a Woods over. there there's no Woods there isn't we. went in the darkness the darkness and we. rehearsed it for the first time so. excuse us so you're getting it the first. time all right the first time we've ever. done this all right are you going to. help us sing Josh ask. help are you guys ready to go you guys. ready to go.
1 2 3. 4. oh what I want you. guys hold on hold on you're too early. now no we got it he still we [ __ ]. rehears the [ __ ] Fe he got it no he. stops and then you go got it one more. time 1 2 3. four yeah. yeah two more times it is I'll tell you.
win no wi [ __ ] here we go what I want. you got my. [Music]. behind cand. [Music]. C thought dreams scatter and you pull. them all together and I can't explain oh. yeah well. you you make my dreams come.
true well well well. you you making my dreams come. [Music]. true you two are bad friends who are. these two idiots a white dude and an. Asian dude you two are. disgusting you two are something we're. bad friends you have to take your close.
off don't burn your cigarette on your. shirt don't burn your shirt with your. cigarette good. boy all the way or yeah sure we can blur. it go ahead no no we'll do it we'll blur. it go. ahead come on in wow it's so funny and. so small come on in I mean it's a no. it's it's not it's nice it's actually.
kind of nice it's so dark your penis is. the darkest penis I've ever seen in my. entire life come here real quick let me. see hey look at this coming to you live. from Cancun Mexico we're here with Bobby. Lee. sir oh my sleeping God it's so sleepy. peepy F he's so sleepy come on get in. here let's get in the. tub this is definitely the intro yeah. all right I'm going to sit on the edge. while my little nudie booty is down. there.
hey welcome to Cancun I'm your one of. your hosts Bobby Lee and we've got. Andrew Santino and and this has been a. disaster okay welcome welcome back to. bad friends uh Bob's in the tub and he's. butt naked it's been a disaster and it's. been no it's been kind of fun well aside. from the fact that I experienced the. worst show I've ever done in my life we. did the worst show we've ever done in. our entire life you know that was the. worst show I've ever done Jim Jeff at. one point Jim Jeff turned to me and was.
like I can't hear a [ __ ] thing you. saying he couldn't hear anything we were. saying no he looks at me one point his. face is sweating yeah dripping sweat and. he goes can we go wait what is that can. we go let me hear can we go can we go. yeah and I go he's a cheeky little. British boy can we go and I. go let me get in the tub with you get in. here. man this is going to be so bad for my. back scoot back please go back over on. that God I've never seen so much of you. lean it back against there there it is.
put your put your penis put your penis. above your above your thighs though so. it's poking up why cuz I want to see it. can you see it on the camera I'm trying. not to let me see oh cute right yeah. pretty cute it's so funny to see your. little shell just popping up yeah it's. like a um when did it stop growing do. you. think seven bro bro it's always been. growing all right you should see dude I. can't stop you have seen it 20 years ago.
I can't stop looking at it you know what. it is it looked like a skin tag you know. when you're on the beach you know on the. beach and you see like um an animal. emerging from the sand after the water. washes over it that's what that looks. like it pops up a little bit and then it. goes right back down goes right away no. I feel like it deserves a shell it needs. a shell yeah yeah yeah that it needs a. little thing where protective layer and. it when it pops up just a little head. it's a little eye pokes through yeah. like that right and and it goes back. down is is he going suck me suck me or. is he going suck me feed me oh feed me.
that's hot right but I don't think it. absorbs no you can't it doesn't actually. eat oh can I have a theory have I talked. about this before I might have already. but I have a theory that men queef as. well you've had air come out of your. pants well one night I was in the. bathtub and I hear. a that sound and I realized that was a. little bit of an air coming out of my. pee hole hole H so in theoretically it's.
a queef but it's coming out of a penis. and just because it doesn't make a lot. of sound like a woman's queef does. women's are full on give me an example. of a woman's queef is. like yeah and mine's more like yeah but. have it afterward so we call it a PFF a. PFF you want to call a PFF PFF I just I. think I've come up with a new term I've. never done that have you ever ped fany. you don't know you're doing it because. it's so small I don't think I have yeah.
you don't think you have you've never. ped I yeah I don't think I P I don't. think you're I don't know if that's real. but I think it could just be your. biology maybe it's a theoretical idea. that probably isn't true but you know. let me let's talk about Endor okay so. here's what happened first of all can. you get a shout out there George look. what they put they put us so many other. people Nikki Glazer got a sh got a um an. ocean front view we have the jungle and. zoom down if you can see down there. people are cutting as we're podcasting. they're uh well you can't they're. cutting it's Mexican people doing what. they do they're just cutting away they.
just love it as soon as they find what. are you looking at. what as soon as they find a knife or. scissors they're like I got to go to cut. a something and they just got to go cut. stuff Bobby said that that was a reward. I said is that a punishment and Bobby. said no that's a reward for them well I. don't know if you know this but if you. want to capture a Mexican all you have. to do is put no if you just hear me just. all you have to do is build it like a. little cage yeah right well right and. then you have a little trapo thing right. I get that right and inside just put a. couple of scissors like one those long.
Che Shear what they call them W whackers. yeah weed whackers yeah and all of a. sudden you hear tongue the gate will. close and you have four of. them you'll have you'll get four of them. yeah yeah what are we doing here yeah. what are we doing here and they get. scared and all you have to do is give. them a chimy chonga that's it yeah it. relaxes them oh they calm down yeah they. love fried. beef they love it it relaxes them and. what you do is comprende compr.
which means do you understand right. correct and they go we in their own way. I don't know Spanish but in their own. way they're going we've we know that. we've run into a Korean demon oh yeah. when they know right away. they and let me tell you something. racist what I just said it is but please. don't steal a Please Don't Steal a Mex. it feels racist well remind the fans Not. to steal a Mexican please don't don't. steal the Mexicans no Ste it's just. something to do that's like a sign they. would have at the border please don't. steal the Mexicans yeah yeah yeah but if.
you notice out here this is where they. shot. Endor I that really is where they shot. wait really yeah no yeah they shot Endor. SC Not in Cancun but in this area area I. just speak just made that oh I know you. did speaking of Cancun last night uh we. were happy to know that we did a couple. of shows um we can cut to the tape right. now of us bombing with Jim Jeff uh. you'll see some of this right now here. you go you I. masturbate.
thank you and I get really lonely you. know so when I masturbate I grab my own. ass is that that was it yeah I should. write. more I should write more look that joke. crushed yeah what a that was a. killer I have another one give me. another shot please try one more time I. have another shot I have another all. right so my mom was a jeo. witness you guys know that know that my. mom was a Jehovah Witness say to me my.
mom was a Jehovah Witness your mom was a. Jehovah's Witness yeah you guys know. that right his mother is a Jehovah's. Witness is that's what's happening can I. translate the jokes for the Australian. people. [Laughter]. or let me finish the [ __ ] joke okay. so that my mom used to knock on my. bedroom door and I go what do you want. mom she'd go just. practicing. crushed crushed. pretty good joke clean too when was the.
last time you did that joke 20 years ago. 20 years it was about five seconds ago. just you do a joke that you used to do. 20 years ago yeah. [Applause]. yeah. um every time I'll sit. down you don't boss me around.
I flew here for you. okay uh okay I'll. [Applause]. uh two Jews. uh it's okay. um uh 20 years ago joke of my one of my. first jokes was uh. um oh I saw a sign I saw a sign a girl. holding a sign that said start over.
start over is that it start over it. wasn't clear start over and more energy. because you're doing a joke this is a. show so a little energy all right. everybody Andrew stio. wo make a. good um I saw a girl holding a sign and. it said Make Love Not War which is weird. because every time I make love it's just. like War there's a lot of Destruction a.
lot of. death and money is usually. owed it's a prostitute an old prostitute. joke pretty good it's one of my first. jokes pretty good joke Jim you Jim can. you do a bad joke you did from back in. the day doesn't want to do it he doesn't. have any bad jok can't think no I have. bad I can't remember any stuff from 20. years ago that was like one of the first. shitty jokes that I wrote and I remember. it actually did good enough in open mics. where I was like all right I I I I can. remember one bit I used to do from my.
first ever set but it's not hold on hold. on it's it's not good it was from let's. hear it let's hear it let's hear it it. was from my first set so it's not yeah. come on come on baby come on baby I. don't remember how I. goes so I used to be I used to be. obsessed with doing like religious jokes. I probably watched too much Bill Hicks. or some [ __ ] like that so I this this is. what I had was uh I was like uh Jesus. right.
he didn't know he was Jesus until he was. 30 he died at 33 for the first 30 years. he did [ __ ] nothing and then when he. turned 30 he started doing Miracles and. [ __ ] for the last three years and then. he died surely his mother would have. said. something she would have gone I was. artificially inseminated by an Angel you. should check on that maybe that was but. he worked as a carpenter up until then. maybe it was n't his fault maybe his dad.
sat him down and said look it's good. that you got and all that but maybe you. should get yourself a trade first. something to fall back. on and I go now there's an ending hold. on I go it would have been weird every. time he was talking to like a thousand. people there always would have been one. [ __ ] up the back going isn't that the. bloke That Built My. gazebo yeah. baby.
very good that a good joke that was me. for me Andreas your turn Andreas Andreas. everybody andr. everybody get over. here ladies and gentlemen he's been. practicing for six months I can't he's. got great jokes. man one more time I I don't know his. last name Andreas everybody.
no just. keep come on fans come on. fans they enjoy torturing me hey also. little little little standup comedy tip. untuck your trouser from your sock that. throws the audience. up yeah or or make a match that's a much. better like you meant to do. it.
[Applause]. do the joke it's coming do the joke fans. okay here we go all right a really piey. uh. joke what do you call a [ __ ] a fat. [ __ ] a fat [ __ ] what do you call a fat. [ __ ] did he say fat chick what do you. call a fat chick is that what you say. what do you call a fat chick I feel the.
name fat chick is already me you call a. fat chick chunk. chunk what. chunk chunk Andreas give him a round of. applause. also um uh last night in Cancun uh PE uh. cartel storm day Resort and shot two. people and killed him do you know this. that's heay no no no that's that's.
rightwing rightwing media dude it's here. oh is that fake news I don't know I let. me ask you something right now with your. little orange eyes yeah right do you see. any other hotels around here no well. then you put two and two together it's. didn't happen fake news yeah would have. happened in that little house over there. yeah that little tiny Hut down there my. point is is this did it really happen. yeah two people got killed but you know. it's 30 minutes north what I loved about. what happened last night is you had to. tell the organizer. mhm last night in the right the guy that.
work the information you go yeah did you. know that in the result afterwards. there's a [ __ ] standown there's. [ __ ] fighting people dang and he was. like and he was like freaking out he was. like oh really yeah and he could tell in. his mind like what do I do cuz I even. said to him I was like I'm going to get. on a flight and go home and he was like. yeah why did you say that cuz I get. uppity and puppet when I get you were. really I've never seen you so sad yeah. because we ate [ __ ] we ate [ __ ] I never. bombed with you before like that in my. mind we know because it was just we.
couldn't do anything we couldn't hear. each other the crowd was like it was. there was 600 people something like that. and it was the ceilings were 30 feet. high oh I you couldn't hear anything. honestly 5 minutes in yeah I had that. feeling of like oh this is going to be. the worst human experience of my life we. panicked that was terrible he may never. talk to us again he won't he actually. told me he's like lose my my I feel that. that it felt like we're never going to. see him again yeah but it's okay it's.
fine yeah although he I brought up the. Brad Pit thing do you hear me say that. yeah what do you mean oh yeah yeah yeah. yeah so one time I was with Jim in. Canada and Brad Pit kept texting him and. I just thought that was really cool that. he knew him it is cool don't you think. that's cool it is what's the biggest one. you know the biggest celebrity I know. yeah. [Music]. um maybe fancy yeah fancy might be the. by the way you know how can I rub my can.
I rub my dick against your leg do you. know how famous this guy is in Mexico. fancy everyone is stopping. him oh my god it feels so. gross it's so gross your wiener on my. ankle what's falling off is that dirt. falling off it's dust not. dirt does this help but dude this is. like if my leg gets infected with. something I'm going to be so upset yeah. yeah this feels like a.
yeah this yeah this reminds me I'm. making love to T Tanya Le. hard what T Le Hardy you mean you. mean hard Lee. Davis this is so uncomfortable keep. going by the way look at look can you. put hey put my big toe up near your your. penis and see which one's bigger oh my. God my big toe is bigger my big toe is. bigger yes it is it's not bigger dude. that's ridiculous sit back a little bit. you I your body is beautiful it's like a. little round damn I love the compliments.
it's like a a little yellow egg yeah. it's like a when you get you know it's. when you get to my age and you look in. the mirror yeah you just don't care. anymore why don't you care anymore. you're 50 and you're like it what it's. like let's suppose I'm single again mhm. right I feel like I still be able to. maybe swing. some no honestly you don't think maybe. no no no you think that if I was single. I wouldn't be able to get a girl I think. they okay no but you you honestly think.
that I would not what scale of what. scale are you looking at like what. number on the number scale of 0 to 10. for real what kind of what kind of woman. do you think you could get at this point. in your life in your career well I'm not. leaving Kila so let's just throw that. you just did a hypothetical if you were. single but hypothetically right what. kind of girl I think that I could. probably do what I mean number-wise. yes don't say I kind of want to do it. just to prove you. wrong but uh I think I can do a nine no. way hey no nothing over eight what it's.
Kila 8 then no we're talking about the. future K now well that's you to judge. not me what did you judge a 10 a 10. pandering he's pandering he's pandering. what about you George a 10 six and a. half five and a half six and a half I am. more. toward no she's to me no she's the best. but say n or a 10 in the future I'm. we're talking about in the future if. you're trying to get something new. you're getting nothing above an eight no. chance and all this is doing is having. someone that we know the fans are going.
to go I'm a nine and I would date Bobby. that's what's going to happen now yeah I. mean with the depreciation of the coin. here in Mexico maybe he can get a. 10 this is the problem once you bring. him down here he starts soaking up some. of his old ways yeah I I don't that's. that's old ones who bring me down here. are going to a fancy business your old. Proverbs come out I don't like it oh my. God we did this last time we went to. dinner the first night me George and. fance went to dinner and fancy was. wasting we've got some video of him. dancing you guys can.
[Music]. see. yeah this is the thing that we learned. the Mexicans hate fancy because he. speaks with like Upp British accents. that's what I could tell and then. honestly the the waiter come over and. every time he came over fancy goes. M and the guy would bend down and he. would roll his eyes and fancy didn't. notice because he was shitfaced but. fancy speaks with like a proper British. accent right down here it's like Cockney. like oh you want another yeah want. another cup cup of soup but and Fancy's.
like yes I'd like another cup of soup. please that's he's so he's way too up. they did not the Mexicans hated it but I. do love being cuz we went to the Mexican. restaurant last night and knowing that. you know the language doesn't it feel. better well it makes me feel a little. bit safer but then I know they also. don't like him you tell they don't but. at least we have communication something. we have something there yeah do you feel. them judging you a little bit fance a. little bit a little bit yeah how can you. tell like did they smirk you a little. bit when you yeah they roll their eyes.
they so imagine dude back in the day. dudes that look like him they get off a. boat here in Mexico in Mexico right they. have swords probably you guys have. swords back then swords and Crosses. swords and Crosses right came on the. beach right with your glowy white skin. mhm and you saw a brown person and what. you went haywire onuh get him get him. they're they're terrible people to. Spanish really and then you guys shared. your language with them is that what. that happened force them to speak it.
force them to speak your language with. your God we call them G ging culture giv. culture that's what they call yeah he. would bigot and look at the woods out. here how much atrocity has happened his. people baby just tied to a tree why. would you tie the babies to the tree as. like a well it was like a landmark cuz. that's how they know to get back to. where they're going oh really that's. like hand they ask the babies or they de. well you they ask him and say do you. mind us making you a landmark well no. you have the baby tied to a tree they're. a landmark do you go Hey where's West.
over there sir I mean do they. talk how about it this way yeah anyway. what why did you do those to the people. back then I think it was just a way to. connect. with that. was yeah I mean now we have social media. now which is cool but back then dude. they had their own way to connect that. was social media yeah yeah yeah they're. poking is with a sword so it was like. so I'm so so so pillaging and raping and.
murdering that was your that was like a. post for you guys that's like an. Instagram post how many likes did that. get the whole village was like that's. good that's good that's good and then. they celebrated these people were I mean. I I say Mexico over Spain 100% Mexico is. great I love Mexico man it's it's. beautiful butcher box you know what. Andrew yeah here's what I love in life. meat not only meat Quality Meat quality. high high quity y the animal need to be.
cute you need to be cute in quality yeah. yeah when you hey when you get high. quality meat from butcher box it is. delicious we get it all the time it's. the best I do my whole entire freezer is. filled with it's 100% grass-fed beef. it's free range organic chicken it's. wild caught seafood and more and their. sourcing decisions are made holistically. that's right they keep I love that word. holistically do you know what it means. no but they keep the farmer the planet. the animal and your family in mind. always delivering products you can trust.
what's your favorite kind of meat I like. pork chops me too yeah I like a good. little oinker on my plate I love pork. chops and I got to tell you something. butcher bucks has pork chops and they. are El delicioso yeah and uh also uh. every time I get uh butcher box it's not. just like you get one little tiny thing. you get a ton you get eight 8 to 14. pounds of meat and I'm going to tell you. there's no. antibiotics and they and or added. hormones it's the best quality basically. what we're saying customize your own box.
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voice little boy Korean boy what would. be your life song If someone had if. imagine if Frank sinatro or someone like. that was still alive and they sung a. song about you yeah how would it go like. when he dedicated songs to like cities. or people or women hello San. Diego little Korean boy is born beat. beat beat him. down with the golf club beat them down.
mation in your future is it slick is it. slippery stuff right yeah yeah yeah yeah. yeah and then here comes the drugs the. drugs are on your. highway right. molest drugs drugs Korean boy you got a. sad future different genre what you're. doing I think oh sorry yeah San Diego. yeah but what is that that's doesn't he.
talk about doesn't he talk about cities. yeah but sinatro. be he doesn't talk about cities yeah he. does yeah well let's go back San Diego. USA right but do it in Frank I know how. start you start you start his his his. rhythm was like uh his rhythm was like. remember the song One Singular Sensation. you know one one sing. every little step you take do that San.
Diego California no he would have. gone Frank would have gone San Diego. what a town yeah little Korean boy. beating around he's getting abused and. molested thrown out of. Windows he contested he takes it in his. tou hey yeah he's a dirty little guy. gush a. wait wait wait did you just say a new.
RAC racist term did I just make up a. term Gushi gush GUI gush is a new racist. term is. he I want to say this too when it comes. to racial terms yeah it literally goes. [ __ ]. uhhuh guci go guci go GUI go to me guy. go hurts more than go hurts yeah hurts. more than any hurts more than any of. them ever call me that your album guy go. yeah yeah 100% guy goou he's a little.
[ __ ] goou he's a sneaky sneaky is always. good he's a little sneaky go a go he's a. sneaky go go is nice it's g o o h go. sneaky goou yeah name your next special. sneaky goou I will he's a little sneaky. goou yeah what about you what if uh s. Frank sinatro sing a song about you. Chicago Chicago he's a redhead from. divorce and drugs and alcohol and then.
he was sad abused as a boy beat up in. bullied big old ears pale and thin as. rail he's got pimples all over his face. pimple all over his butt can you teach. me how to teach me how to rap you want. me to teach you how to rap I've never. learned how to rap I really haven't all. right so so they so I I I think I wrote. One my name is Bobby Lee I'm the king of. society I rap I sing I do it in. variety wrot that's so bad I wrote that.
when I was a kid but that's like the '. 80s R yeah yeah yeah my name is Bobby. Lee king of society I rap I sing I do it. in variety oh oh and then they raise the. roof right well they don't do that. anymore back in the day though back in. the day they sometimes did yeah yeah. yeah but don't you understand that that. the rap you're doing is like this that. was like cool in the gang when it was. like I don't know new that's the thing. it's like I I love music mhm you don't. but you don't love rap just hear me out.
it's because of the black people you. don't like the black people and that's. what it is name a black artist that you. like right now go fast Smalls Smalls. yeah Bigg Smalls who is that Biggy. Smalls he's dead give someone that's. current I could I said shupac shupac. shac that's in. Korean shupac shupac is here. shupac you. like briy briy shoy and Sho batt no. because back in the day like you when my. brother was into hip-hop I would like he.
he still is he. loves you know when Jurassic 5 came out. I want that album you know what I mean I. mean there are certain album but I it's. been so long since somebody said you. should check out this new hip-hop album. I kind of lost my way I want to like I I. was into like tribe call Quest back in. the day I loved you know deas soul back. those type of that that but rap but it I. just got lost in my way it has nothing. to do with anything culturally or. anything like that yeah it's just you I. want to learn no that's not you but you.
just no one's suggesting I'll suggest a. bunch of albums for you to listen to. I'll send you a bunch of stuff on. Spotify can I be honest with you too you. don't like it no can I be completely in. ut you you don't want me to give you. knowledge about something no that's not. what it is and it's so funny that you. say that because K that says that all. the time it drives me crazy what is it. then is I don't trust your. taste I really don't I honestly don't. trust have. such when it comes to movies and when it. comes to anything Arts. I don't listen to you you have bad art.
taste I'm not dude I'm not saying that. to start a fight with you I'm I'm trying. to be [ __ ] honest with you and being. [ __ ] I'm being honest with you yeah. yeah I don't trust your tastes I don't. trust your tastes and that's fine and we. could still do our podcast you just. don't know anything about hip-hop and so. you're embarrassed if I teach you. something it's it's embarrassing to you. if I teach you about the culture you. know nothing about the culture this is. how I work you barely. work or you want to go there. yeah I.
don't all right I definitely don't but. no you're working too much Bobby's going. back to Hawaii do Magnum PI then he's. going back to New York to do Sex in the. City then he's going back can I tell you. how I work please can I tell you how I. work please sorry for yelling that's. fine Kile will be like you should like. two years ago you should watch this. movie I'm sure it's good oh yeah right. once they say that it takes me a year to. get around understand that right if I. can discover something on my own I'm.
generally more you know on it you know. but my teeth hurt so bad right now wait. why because I went to the dentist a. month ago and this side of the my mouth. two teeth were in really pain let me see. open your mouth real fast no no not. right now let me finish what I'm going. to say let me see let me say let me. finish what let me finish what I'm going. to say okay this side of the mouth now. is being to really hurt my bottom tooth. it's so sore I I I have to drink eat.
ibuprofen every. hour you know that's not good for you. for your. liver why do we we stayed in the pocket. for too long I think no it was good. enough make a decision it enough's again. no now going kiss me you're going to. kiss me we got to go back no we're not. we got to go back in the pocket I had to. make a different. decision you should have done it all. right [ __ ] I missed my but wait Bob you. know you do know that your heart your. heart is your teeth you know you can.
have a heart attack from having bad. teeth do you know that that's a real. thing have you guys never heard of this. if you're if you have like infections in. your mouth it can cause heart disease. I'm being 100% am I lying or am I am I. telling the truth and then what what's. the point what can I do here in Mexico. right hold the mic fans yeah what can I. do in Mexico right now what do you mean. yeah am I going to have a heart attack. there's nothing I can do I mean when I. get back into La let me feel your pulse. don't don't touch my [ __ ] body dude. I'm going to feel your pulse all. right feels good huh I'm I'm you know. how I'm here ready count George do a. timer on this P so I can we can see how.
high his blood pressure is ready hold on. up here it's up here all right you grab. my. dick well stop ready you ready tell me. start grab your dick no stop it I can't. do your pulse if you're grabbing my. penis Bob would you do this in the. emergency room if they're like sir. you're a doctor maybe I am all right I'm. training to be a doctor I'm not going to. squeeze your dick hard yes you are I. know what you're going to do you're. going to pinch it I need your pulse I. need your pulse you're going to pinch it. as hard as you can I'm not stupid how. about this you punch me in the face if I. punch it too hard if I squeeze too hard.
no it's a really good test for I don't. buy it well you're going to have to. because I've been down this road with. you before I know but it always goes the. way that I know it's going to go can I. have another shot no I beg of you can I. have another shot no no no thank you as. a friend no thank you well you're not. touching my [ __ ] thrat throat fine. all right even stepen you just ruin the. bit because you want to squeeze my. [ __ ] penis no the bit is funny if I. stick my two fingers on your penis while. you do it that's the bit what you're. ignoring they can't even see that and it. doesn't do anything it makes it funny. for you you're going to end up my penis. or flicking my penis let's vote let's. vote yeah it's it is a democracy is it.
not no it's not yes it is no we're in. Mex right right me pulsing Andrew's dick. raise your hand pulsing Andrew's dick. raise your hand thank you so much all. right three against one let's go are you. ready what I'm going to give you an. example I promise I I prom I prom I'm be. so mad all right I promise ready you get. my you get my you get my ball do not. tell me what territory I can. I want to conquer the territory I want. toquer no I don't no no I don't let you.
conquer my ter I'm I'm going to fight. dude if I'm mellin I see an island right. you can't be telling me what island to. [ __ ] side of the island can you imagine. you want a boat finding new land out I'm. not going to let you punch me in the. penis I'm not going to I swear to God I. won't just gentle watch how gentle going. see it's nice yeah all right George. ready stop stop stop laughing cuz we. have to take your pulse stop calm I know. stop hold on hold on hold on. and ready George and stop I'm gonna get.
hard don't do that okay you want to. start yeah start start on one start on. one two three one two three four five. stop rubbing my penis. stop yeah yeah did you okay multiply. that multiply it it was five seconds so. five beats so a beat a second yeah yeah. 60 beats a second that's really good. that's really good pressure that's like. some of the best blood pressure I've. ever heard I know and I I was going to. tell you that God that's really good. didn't test it no we just tested it I'll.
what is that you know what what is that. that's no matter who's touching your. penis man woman it doesn't matter it's. going to get hard if you rub the head. it's going to get hard if you rub the. head I'm saying I don't think that's. true I'm not attracted to you at all you. start rubbing the head it's going to get. hard let's can we do it a little science. experiment let's do a little science. exper we have to do it on fancy all. right on George rub George's penis and. let him do it and see if he gets yeah. George stand right here George get over. here stand get over here George stand. right here let's see if we can get in. your heart I'm but it's got and you have. to rub the head of his spe like you did.
mine oh I'm going to do it I'm going to. be Pro you be Pro yeah I'm going to be. the way of whatever this is hold on one. second hold on hold on let fancy go see. if he can see it he's getting ready he's. getting stacked up George is getting so. stacked up all we're ready to go yeah. ready okay we're ready to go for some. reason I have to Loop my fingers 100%. yeah yes he does yes he does yes he does. for some reason I have George how else. could it be how else could it be yeah. there it. is all right right hold on here we go. where is it right here yeah you feel it. yeah this is so gay yeah this feels gay. so what but it feels it he spitting on.
my bad my bad let me see all right no. but do it soft do it soft I am do it. soft hands in the air don't put your. hands in your 60 close your eyes no no. no let him do that I like that let him. do that that's funny to me when you. close your eyes it makes it in let him. close his eyes yeah yeah no because he. doesn't know don't visualize anyone else. he doesn't know who's doing it don't. visualize anyone else all right all. right I'm going to start the timer look. it's getting bigger I'm going to start. the timer can I notice do you notice Le. oh my God you're leaking it's leaking. all right here we go I'm going start the. time 60 seconds ready and go 59 58 how's.
it going s oh my God moving six it's. moving yes it is yes it is it's moving. oh my God it's. moving oh my God George George it's. thicker now than it was when you over. 100% 100% oh my God oh my God oh my God. is this oh yeah yeah yeah look at it. look look at look look at look at it. dude look at it at look at Get It Go. baby all right get out of here has you.
lost let me tell you something I. physically watched it move look at this. it went like this the head literally. went like this yeah yeah you know what. reminded me it was escaping it reminding. me that you and I are astronauts where. we find a new mclass planet right and. we're going should we get [ __ ] the go. ahead from NASA you're like let's just. go down let's just go we go down we land. smoothly right we see an animal that's. what it looked like something a brand. new kind of species yeah and we touch it. and it goes like.
this yeah yeah wow that was CRA can you. hey can you imagine if we go to a planet. like that and there's little penises all. over the place yeah and we run out of. food we run out of food here we go again. what does everything have to do every. time you and I are together homorotic it. goes into some weird homorotic place. that I don't want to venture to okay I. have Christian I I'm not a Christian. you're not but I have beliefs so okay. what are your Bel Christian belief and. what are they are you repressing. something Hollow ghost what's it called.
Hol ghost the hollow. ghost did I say Hollow ghost all praise. the Hol ghost the hollow ghost right. yeah the Trinity is what I'm talking. about the Trinity is what give it to me. it's Jesus Christ God man no what father. son and the the holy ghost hly ghost the. Hol ghost the hollow ghost yeah yeah and. so I believe in all those things did you. guys have crosses in your house did your. mom put up crosses we didn't have a. single no you did in your hallway or. something but my brother you know cuz. you know my brother was.
um a born again Christian in his in high. school no yeah and he would cut out you. know this he would cut out of Bible. verses and tape them to the wall yuck. and it got to the point where his. bedroom was from top to bottom Bible. verse W you mean like the guy from seven. seven seven seven does he not have that. anything like that anymore in him as. soon as he lost State all God went away. I couldn't agree more if you lose State.
you're like I don't believe in God yeah. yeah yeah God went away were you. religious fans when you were a kid no. never never even with all that Spanish. cathol I went to Catholic school but I. was the only one who didn't so in. Catholic School in Spain did they do the. same thing to the boys that they do here. in the United States is it different in. Catholic School no same thing same. rituals same rituals yeah what about you. George uh grew up religious super. religious yeah you know that right I. know I do I know I know I know but. Seventh Adventist were you ever were you.
ever touched by a priest yeah no were. you ever touched by a priest look at him. dude no no look at George again right oh. my God you can see it now I saw no he's. unfuckable you think the priests were. like next so look at him again right and. with a straight face ask him with a. straight face ask him and then George. comes in the room the priest. says and George comes in he's like you. wanted to see me he's like h get out. ship. station hey man holidays are coming and.
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stuff like that right now how do you not. know what those are what are they. cumulus they're accumulative they're all. accumulative yeah yeah those are really. good stuff anyway let's talk about let's. not talk about that then I don't know. much about it well don't cut us off at. the past when we were really rolling. over. there what do you mean just cuz we were. talking about weird uncomfortable stuff. doesn't mean we can't talk about weird. uncomfortable stuff I'd rather talk. about penises actually you're right. that's my number one go-to yeah yeah. yeah yeah why is that though um we're F. my trouble pants is it my trouble past.
do you think that's why you always pull. it out yeah I you know I've been. thinking about lately why cuz last night. I got naked on stage yeah so in my head. I'm like what do I do to save this the. show yeah when the show was going really. when things are going nudity is always. my. like Escape pod well okay here's the. deal yeah here's what you did I made the. joke because we were called back to you. taking off your shirt and giving your. shirt away so you gave your shirt way to. a girl who aggressively came up and okay. can I say this though stole it can I say.
this yeah that's the second shirt you've. given away of mine stop it's because the. shirts I'm wearing are like you know. what I mean expensive expensive right so. when you give it away to an audience. member I feel guilty yeah you and so I. just gave away my favorite Bowie shirt. what did she give you in return nothing. a tiger belly shirt no but yeah but that. was from his boy her boyfriend one and. the same they came together with a. mission in mind they literally I make. the tiger belly shirts well then now you. got one oh I made it back you made it. back I made my money back you made your.
money back yeah but I lost the fancy. anyway let's talk about full circle it's. a full circle so you gave away your. shirt which I'll never stop doing at. live shows in fact be prepared when we. do bad friends live on the road next. fall you were going to give away a shirt. in every city terrible shirt every C no. you better wear cool shirts no you have. to that's part of the game so I wear the. coolest shirt that I have give away in. every city oh [ __ ] it's so fun I don't. like it no I love it because it gives. the fans something to take why why is. the food so bad here the food is pretty. bad the food food is pretty bad I mean. it's like there were eggs in green salsa.
this morning yeah and I'm I swear to God. it was Ninja Turtle color I was like. that's ooze that's ooze Ninja Turtle. ooze did I eat it yeah yeah you know. what they put in my hamburger huh you. know how you go to Mexican restaurants. in La and they have those carrots oh. yeah yeah they're pickled which are. Delicious By the way in terms of Mexican. right things that they've invented not. on a. hamburger not on a hamburger not a. hamburger but let say in terms of the. things let's celebrate Mexico let's talk.
about the things that they have given us. yeah this planet and this is a great. Sacrament okay let's give it up Mexico. El Mariachi Mariachi right what a great. instrument what great outfits tacos. tacos is a huge one my bad I love that. could be number one dude that might be. number one yeah yeah well burritos and. tacos are hand in hand yeah yeah that's. a great noise in terms of. noises is one of the best like arbitrary. random things that you could say in a.
celebratory environment you know what my. best noise is that they gave us what. that's such a good right right it's a. car starting and this is just the the. Basse beat. of right such a great Foundation cuz you. could put horns on top you can put horns. like right and then do one of your. noises it's right number one. hit laba man will you shake it for a.
second while I do that just Dan I had a. dream too Richie you remember that in. laboma that poor [ __ ] Cartoonist the. brother anyway my point is is that let's. talk about Mexico more wait hold on I. want to do this let's guess words that M. Andreas tell us a word uh and we'll try. to guess what it is in Spanish or vice. versa give us a Spanish word we'll try. to guess what that means in I'll start. I'll give you let him do ITA I know what. is playground. close Playa I I know it it's like a.
court like like like a little an area of. land it's very close to it what jungle. Plateau with the water Forest Beach yeah. pla Beach yes [ __ ] we should definitely. know that one where this place is called. pla something. yes um I didn't know that I didn't know. that either okay I need to see one let's. go to the paa what what say it again. hung hung that's that's jungle that that. was too CL give us something way out of. the in George if you have one whisper it. to him wait wait can I just ask another.
question so hunga is spelled jungle like. jungle right this is how what I want to. know about language okay no let me ask. you about language I know watch yeah all. right watch us do an ad read for Babble. right now right so in obviously English. it's jungle right yeah so at some point. did the languages mix and they took. jungle and they just said let's just not. create a word for Jungle let's just say. it differently we even history you know. Latin right you know things are D.
derived from. Latin well that's the Chain of Thought I. don't know you already know you know the. answer that's. true give me another word give him. another word all right here's one that. always messed me up in Argentina okay uh. L rolling say it again L rolling. you word can you spell the word can you. spell the word. please l o. s r o l l i n g. yes it's it spells Los rolling uh. usually in the uh is that what you do.
when you're down there rolling rolling I. am rolling rolling you like L rolling I. am Los rolling on MDMA what is L what is. L rolling you think Los rolling come on. Bob I don't know but I know I when I. hear it it makes sense to me I want to. create a word right now though is it a. product can I tell can I create a word. right now is it an action or a verb the. Rolling Stones what same thing the. Rolling Stones the most confusing things. are like when they're saying things in. English yeah like do you like Los be.
beas the Beatles yeah that beetles. rolling that's the Rolling Stones it's. just the Rollings REM RM is REM so. stupid that's so funny I created a word. yes what is the. word so a long time ago um the word is. alono say it again alono spell the word. it's like a l o n o it's what you are. all the time no no alono so when my. father used to take me to in high school.
or in middle school he used to take me. to Korea Town in LA and we go to Spas. yeah. and in Korean Spas there's a lot of old. Korean men there and they they get naked. yeah and they do stretches yeah and one. day my dad was stretching and I saw an. area of his body that I wasn't meant to. see his butthole no. close though his his like the under like. between his butthole and his out his.
taint and what do they call that the. taint is what taint or nifkin or gu orle. on my dad's taint though was one I'm not. laying oh my God skin. tag one and I used to call it. alono as a kid I used to call it alono. alono and did he know that and he alono. would say stuff to me in my mind in the. middle of the night no just if I saw him. at the spa I could hear him go help or.
right I scared I scared yeah I always. want to go well why don't you just move. up to the neck with the other skin tag. get up there you know what I mean why go. down there in the darkest s place that's. where they start and if they have if. they have passion Drive yeah he's a lazy. he didn't crawl up the lazy alono lazy. Al what's what's the word lazy in in. Spanish bago bago Pago b alono b b Al so. a little skin tag alono why do you have. skin tags from your like your dad.
there's one on your neck right thank you. no no no I have them I have them under. my armpit you're welcome are you going. to get them under your fa on your face. did your dad have them on his face yeah. he cuz some Koreans have them on their. face I almost asked the um when they. were cremating my dad like that one is. to keep alono would that been can you. suggest that like at at 100% when. they're doing the body and go hey how do. you say it like K like you're the what a. Cre what do you call him I'm I'm I'm I'm. a I'm a mortician yeah yeah okay go.
ahead y my dad I know I know God bless. I'm so sorry about your father yeah yeah. uh you're doing the the amount of feces. that were still left inside his. intestines was insane yeah he he was po. Master it was insane all right so we did. clean him out though he's a poo Master. he's a poo Master yeah did you clean him. out it took us about an hour and a half. that's fine do whatever you want by the. way cuz we're closing that s anything. yeah yeah yeah but Mike we can do. whatever we want to the body yeah but. FYI FYI right yeah I don't know if you. know it's is fine you know what I mean.
but did you do some of the back work uh. on his on his back yeah of course do you. do below the back or his his his tush. yeah I did his tush yeah in if did you. open sure did you you have to open right. yeah I open it wide up did you see. alono are you talking about the the skin. T Soul skin tag down there yeah we kept. it did did you really Mike bring out. alono yeah yeah we have it oh that's. amazing do you want it what if Alona for. some reason once you detach them he.
becomes a he start growing he has legs. and he goes like hey puppy do you have. all of your dad still I have I have his. ashes yeah are you going to dump him. somewhere no really do you think they're. happier that way I think it's to be. dumped H don't you think it's to be. dumped here's the reason why you dump. them in a place that they loved my dad. didn't love anywhere that's the problem. honestly you know there's not a place. you know your you know your dad would. love if we hit you with his. ashes that's hilarious it would make him.
feel at home right yeah like he's in. heaven probably going whoa something. going on good we put him in a sock and. we just hit you with it and he looks. down and his spirit is his spirit is. like a [ __ ] a warrior yeah I would. love that you want to talk about the. movie yeah okay so fine let's announce. to the fans we're doing here it is we're. doing the bottom of the Turtle Island in. Spain f we're going to do it for real uh. we're putting together everything we.
need to put together and we're going to. we're going to actually try to do it are. you excited fans Fan's going to direct. very excited do we trust him can you do. it I can do it but have you seen. anything that he's directed did you. watch his movie well he did stke me in. the sketch he was okay I remember pretty. good really good I mean he a all right I. love your of the okay I love your friend. coming to your [ __ ] defense that was. nice of all the guys that you of all the. guys that you guys went to school with. do you think he's one of the top tier. guys that you went to school with truly.
yeah Wow and his skill set by far the. highest is directing yeah the highest. what the highest of his skill sets is. directing or no yes yeah and then what's. the highest what's the highest of your. skill set George producing producing do. you think George is a good producer I. think he's a great producer he really is. he really is and I don't like giving him. credit can I tell you why you know why I. don't like him credit cuz he gets it a. lot he has a lot of people going George. you do great by the way he's got fans. down here it's amazing the amount of. fans the amount of fans that have said.
hi to fancy be he makes me he makes me. say every time they they yell fancy that. he makes me say like he made me he made. me the amount of fans that have been. like fancy and then I go look at George. is here and they go hey George fancy. they L have you heard of what a q rating. is no so a q rating you know let's let's. hold for a wagon what is that what the. [ __ ] is that yeah wait of Cur rating. like Cur rating put no Q rating Q rating. oh Q rating yeah yeah go ahead so. basically in television shows where they.
test people right and over the years you. know like if you see a guy on a pilot or. he gets a sitcom that gets canceled. really quick his Q rating goes up the. next time he gets a thing basically it's. like test results correct right and. um your Q rating is so much more. advanced than George's wow in terms of. liability W it's a scientific tested. fact it's a fact this isn't this is not. this is and it has to do with his size.
it has to do with his voice it has to do. with his weasel it's very like you know. it's like a cartoony Disney. rat yeah yeah I mean like a singing R. comes on a. tuxedo yeah yeah exactly we have to. shoot an. episode there's always like a spotlight. when he's on the cartoon right he does a. funny thing the kids love it they love. it look at the loser they see that out.
loud in the theater which is the parents. are like oh you're loud he is such we. got to give him one compliment though. he's been getting it's been bad in the. Cancun no one's come up to him and said. hi who George nobody said hi I'll give. George a compliment just one small one. nobody said hi dude people are. celebrating fancy B taking pictures. George have you taken any photos with. anybody I jumped in like behind and jump. in a photo he had jump in somebody. else's photo I think they framed me out. but I was uh photos have you taken fancy. be genuine be genuine a few a few yeah. well he did something because I've been.
observing him and outside the show. before we started he was outside you. notice he was never inside the tent M he. was always outside I noticed and if you. could look at his hands you could see an. invisible fishing rod oh and he was. fishing for compliments out there I tell. we should tell the audience this is. something that's never going to seen and. it was so sad to see this this is what I. saw right him. go right right and he's just out there.
and everyone's like that's a swimming. pool there's nothing in there trust me. he was fishing but he was out there. fishing for hours it was really sad and. you know what's so funny when he. introduced us he went out there. beforehand to turn on the camera George. is already out there I know what that is. just so they go fancy they lost it and I. said fancy what were we doing he goes I. have to turn on the camera and I said. isn't George out there and he goes yeah. but I George was out there yeah George. was already out there oh it's so weird I. didn't think it was out there no one.
said no one said. [Applause]. anything. amig. experience we got the. Dias Andreas give him a round of. applause get up. our. [Applause].
hey. [Applause]. [Music]. guys thank. [Applause]. you lie my legs are. [Applause]. shaking thank you all for coming to. Mexico to see us is our first show. life ever and we're very. [Applause].
excited I didn't realized you guys were. here to sing thank you. yeah so without further Ado let's. introduce the stars of B. friends Bobby Lee and Andrew. [Applause]. Santino. [Applause].
Canada Dry it's never been more dry. Bobby had a can of Canada Dry and we. decided to make a little song about it. we moved inside because the sun got way. too hot can it dry it's never been more. dry that's our um early 2000s when was. that was that early 2000s 82 and all. that stuff yeah all the small P those. guys made some really good hits though. they did and they're all from my area.
yeah from San Diego from Powe. specifically yeah they went to high. school with you what they were high with. you didn't know them specifically but. you know um they did historically I like. what's going on what's going on. man what is going on what is going on so. um are you going to come swimming with. me in the ocean or not for real you know. because you said there were Penguins. what was it penguins in the ocean no. what you said some sort of animal yeah. there's Penguins out there no no what. kind of animal was it no that we saw a. stingray today that's the one that's the. one that killed the Englishman that.
killed Steve Irwin is he English he's. Australian you know what I'm talking. about same and same gouged. out right through his body gouged the. [ __ ] out kind of cool I know that's why. I will not be going oh dude we swam up. to you we touched it I'm not as. qualified as the Englishman Stevie Arin. clearly he wasn't either I my point is. is that he's a professional and he got. gou he got merked but really what I'm. asking you no but it was I think it's a.
Mana Ray there's a big difference I. think it was a Mana Ray say it right you. [ __ ] face hey hey hey hey hey hey Manor. Ray I mean Stingray Mana Ray they're two. different things you [ __ ]. hard no this was a stingray never mind. you can't say that you can't say fard. yeah you can I will no this was a. stingray this was this this was a. stingray yeah so no I will not be going. in but check it okay check it out if I. get gouged out if you promise me I won't. get gouged out promise on our friendship. you won't all right but if I do what do. I get uh a new casket no no no if I if I.
get attacked and get gouged out by one. one of those little muskrats right yeah. what will I get 10 grand cash I'll give. you 10 grand okay so tomorrow tomorrow. we're swimming I'm going to be [ __ ]. with them then no that's not the deal. yeah I want the 10 grand are all. stingrays uh. deadly are no there's no way sting raay. are flat disc shaped creatures with fins. orop generally aren't dangerous in fact.
they have a reputation for being gentle. see they call them puppies of the sea. you've never heard of that before they. actually don't I love the puppies of the. sea but my point is is that knowing me I. don't know what how they lay you know if. they lay on their side no no no and look. that's they that's what they lay on. their backs like and they put their. little f. look like Sting or do they lay like when. they. sleep well they're no their their backs. are up when they swim and they sleep and. then they settle down to the bottom of. the O I don't think they ever go on. their back and look up they can't close.
their eyes and just go look at my dick. well they don't they don't have dicks. they don't have dicks oh wait do stingr. have penises yeah we Google that that's. more important stingr har and we'll. figure out a way to make it gay so fatal. sting in a second so you know what I. mean fatal Stingray attacks on humans. are exceedingly rare only two have been. reported in Australian water since 1945. oh that's so rare both victims were. stung in the chest just like Irwin it. was extremely rare do stingrays have. penises that's the most important the. most important question by far so how do. you tell a sexual maturity male.
stingrays have external sexual organs. called claspers which are visible near. the oh that seems aggressive they have. claspers their penises [ __ ] grab out. of the. vagina that felt so good you me to do it. again I'm a stingray yeah. yeah that's what he does he clasps it. don't do it on my okay sorry sorry I'll. do it sorry yeah that's crazy they have. claspers and what they do is so once. it's in it's in they have two penis like. organism that lie within modified pelvic. fins they have two dicks stingrays have. double dicks Right double dicks how.
about M if we were stingrays how mad. would you be if if as a joke I just. clasped onto your. butthole see how I did that yeah I knew. see how how the angle I was going to say. how funny it would be if you was stingr. and one of your penises was super huge. and the other one was extremely small. and they made fun of you for not having. two equal siiz penises or you can do. jokes like my dad's H black and my mom's. Asian yeah I'm a half half I'm a half. sting yeah yeah I'm a. I'm I I don't know I'm sure there's more.
better jokes Griffin is our Stingray. friend yeah yeah yeah so if it's small. right is that what you're saying what. where's the come where's the come at it. comes out of their P they have double. penises they have two penises so it's. like a two-on-one storage situation when. one is tired the other one goes to work. right because our come is in our sack. correct mhm okay it's not in the penis. area it ends up in there at some point. yeah okay let me have a better spe more. specific question right he takes the. elevator goes coming up yeah you know.
how sometimes you know you you. ejaculate and how good does that feel. this is a good end of the episode yeah. you know how you ejaculate I do know. right and so then you know after you. masturbate or you have sex with a woman. or man whatever your thing is and then. you go I got to go pee right and then. when you pee it's sprays like in 12. different areas funny yeah when you. plugged up the hose right everywhere. right and you don't give a [ __ ] you just. do the best you can yeah you clean it. later well I usually pee in the shower. oh really for that very reason but it.
sprays so what you're what what what. that means is that there's some clog. clog clogging going on clation Clogg. ination going on right so when does that. go away the clogging yeah it eventually. sprays away and then you're done are you. still. clogged are you still clogged no no no. have you been clogged for a long time. clogged for like 6 months. what spraying all over we got to go to. the doctor is that what it is yeah we. got to go to the doctor I think my [ __ ].
just dried like some sort of. adhesive like super glue got on there. cement yeah yeah well maybe you're. that's permanent yeah but it sprays and. is that a problem still yeah like right. now if you go pee it does that 15. different areas and there's blood in the. pee that's fine I think all right I. think that one's not a big deal you know. what if a third thing happens then I'll. go yeah wait till the end wait till. something really happens something like. a foot falls off have you ever had blood. in your pee Oh yeah and in my. poo I've had po blood in both areas this.
is. gross why it's just nasty but speaking. of which what did you come to the door. with this morning when I when I said. hello I knocked on the door go ahead you. say I knocked on the door and Bobby goes. I'm in the bathroom and I go I I go I. clean your room and he goes no can I can. I say it from my point of view. sure all right so this is from my point. of view right yeah I literally wake up. and I get well woken up. how knock knock knock on the door no no. no I'm asking you how did I wake up why.
did what what was the thing that caused. me to wake up a phone call no a poo oh. you had a [ __ ] yeah yeah right your body. my body's like your body your. choice like it's like a little you know. what I mean in my. mind right so my body just goes right. I get to the edge of the bed right and. like a robot and I do this if you had a. [ __ ] camera in the in the hotel room.
God please don't have a camera in the in. the bathroom right but you would see me. walk like a. robot right so I'm taking a poo must. [ __ ] right and as soon as the turtle's. face yeah comes out of the little hole I. hear knock knock knock knock. housekeeping that was you right I went I. went and no I said I got to clean the. room right I going to clean the room I. go I'm taking a [ __ ] I said and then I. go it's okay I going to clean now I.
don't know about you but in my day like. during the day I have these events that. I look forward to just hear me out. taking a [ __ ] is one of them KCK any. [ __ ] is one of them what's the other one. the wind blowing in my face on the beach. you hate the beach I know but I love it. okay I love that part of it okay my. point is is that um I was taking a poo. one of my favorite things in the whole. World mhm you interrupted me correct I. was in a bad mood cuz I had I hadn't.
drinking any coffee so I opened the door. uhhuh and I stick something out what was. it toilet. paper with what poop on. it good. morning that was your good morning to me. good morning will you swim with me. tomorrow though for real in the ocean. the man Raaz for sure you promise yeah. lie can can I can you do me a favor what. George get me toilet not to Pap get me. um a bathing suit you don't you didn't.
bring a bathing suit to the [ __ ]. resort beach resort was in Hawaii too. for a week I didn't bring it why there's. no need there's no need fancy do you. have a bathing suit fancy didn't bring a. ba you didn't bring a bathing suit. you're a loser what do you mean bring a. bathing suit I need a medium bathing Su. bu I just don't know he came to work. George he was getting trashed the last. two nights came to work it's can dry how. did it go it went can it a dry. it's never been more dry oh that's right. that's it oh we have a Rudy didn't Rudy.
want to say something oh my God you see. the video hi to to Bobby hi to to. Andrew good luck in performing in the. Just for Laughs crowd in. Cancun I hope you have a good time I. miss Andreas and George already and I. hope Jim Jeff will be a good Rudy as a. fill in. okay bye thank you for being a bad.
friend here we go what I want you got. and it might be hard to. handle what I want you've got in my big. heart to handle know that you sound. funny why dude what are you doing give. me the ha lift up give me the phone I'm. going to do it and as fancy be give me. the phone right now yeah I'm going to do. it at how fancy B does it right yeah. what I want you've got and it might be.
hard to. handle but like a flame BS the candle. sounds dumb like a candle feels the. flame yeah no one's dancing what I've. got is stock full of thoughts and dreams. that's SC up we're gonna this is we both. have to have to just our phones out yeah. that's what that's fine all right how. about this let me try the one yeah too. fancy no I got want to do I just my own. okay what I want you got it might be. hard to handle. but like the flame that burns the candle. the candle feeds the.
flame well. well you. make. [Music]. well. [Music]. my more. [Music]. you. Dre my back my back my.
back I don't know what. [Applause]. [Music]. it. [Applause]. is that all. right Sano and Bobby.
[Applause]. [Music]. Lee oh.
