High Brow Friends | Ep 51 | Bad Friends
can you hear me i mean kind of but not. really. we can hear the fans more than anything. else. but it looks good doesn't it look good. jules. yeah it looks good all right we can't. hear you i can't hear you now. i can't hear you at all but you look. good you two are bad friends who are. these two idiots. why dude i'm an asian dude you two. are disgusting well you two or something. we're bad. friends why are you in a bad mood jules. she's not in a bad mood she just um.
uh let her say it no let me why because. she's gonna deny it. oh yeah yeah i'm an attorney okay go oh. sorry yeah yeah yeah i remember. i'm representing her oh you do okay yeah. so my client here um. hearsay this is hearsay right from. different sources. right i heard that she had her very. first. panic attack today did you really yeah. yeah she didn't know what it was welcome. i know welcome. i've had so many of them thousands. seriously i'm having one right now.
will you explain will you seriously. explain your experience um. i was doing homework yeah yeah and then. my. hands started to feel numb yeah. yeah what is it what else happened yeah. my hands felt shaky. and numb and then i started to. breathe heavily like i couldn't breathe. oh. like like you were yeah yeah did it feel. like your heart was skipping a beat or.
no. was your heart pounding heavy like you. could feel it out of your chest right. correct another symptom. these are all diarrhea do you know what. you were thinking about at the time when. it happened. yeah what was it secret. oh and now we're gonna have to get that. out of you yeah what's the secret what's. the secret welcome welcome back to. what's that. secret old saying you're as sick as your. secrets that's exactly right. right so what's your secrets make you. sick secret secrets hurt someone. what is it secret secrets are no fun.
secret secret secret hurt someone. dum-dum to you if you have if you have. it if you haven't. every secret has a unique weight to it. and you can only carry them for so long. what is your secret it's a secret. okay it's a secret and what is it not. for long this is where you make it up. okay if you don't want to if you don't. want us to know this we've been doing. this show for. 51 weeks yeah make it up. okay yeah yeah my laptop broke. oh i'm having withdrawal withdrawals.
from what you're yeah having with having. withdrawals from what. it's smaller yeah yeah that's sad what's. the real secret though. yeah that's it. that's it yeah that's such a what a bad. also. by the way to make you feel comfortable. i'm genuine i have i had panic attacks. yeah. for years and i had them in college. i've told the story before but this. isn't fun i was working at a restaurant. and i was serving and i was tired and.
dehydrated and i hadn't just hadn't. eaten all day. and i felt really like hazy and woozy. and i didn't feel one i was like oh man. i just haven't eaten that's why. yeah but i also had worked myself like i. was working crazy hours i wasn't. sleeping. and i get these things called ocular. migraines do you know what that is. i go blind in one eye like i like my. vision goes away. so i started to get an ocular migraine. and i had all those symptoms. i never had had a panic attack before. and i had such a bad [ __ ] panic. attack i went outside behind the. restaurant and i laid down on the rocks.
yep like i was gonna die. yeah another time what he did was he um. here it is. what no no go ahead remember you went to. the bathroom. you stood up you went and you hit your. head again it wasn't a panic attack what. was that it was it was alcohol lack of. sleep and lack of food okay. and whatever that is he does that too. and vertigo yeah yeah. that was silly sometimes i hit my face. on a sink counter. [Laughter]. am i the only one that's ever hit their. head on a sink counter i did this movie. called heartbreakers.
and it was a really bad movie and great. director and um. and i remember and um sticky fingers is. that a wrapper yeah sticky fingers. fingers was in it yeah i was using the. scene he's the chess player. right the chess player right did i tell. you the story about how i. had a monologue no i mean i know you. guys played chess together we did play. chess so i had a monologue with them. right yeah. and i go the camera set up right yeah. it's a it's a. it's a single from my waist up sure and. they go.
and also i remember them they're running. out of time. like like they have to wrap that we. gotta go we gotta go right and i have. this. one page thing. two words that again do it the. hemisphere or whatever the line is. the hemisphere the hemisphere i stop. and i have a [ __ ] panic attack full. on full-on. like i can't talk trembling sweating. right cut cut cut right and you know. people come. you know right because you know we got. to go you're all right because let's.
[ __ ] go. we got to go we got to go which only. like puts [ __ ]. fuel on the fire of course right then. it's way worse yeah so now i'm trembling. like imagine if someone walked in the. room when you're having a panic attack. and i was like what's wrong and you're. like. yeah yeah and i remember um. they just moved on because you can't get. the scene couldn't get it out. oh bob yeah yeah it had but it looks. that's why when. that's why when you call the casting. director when i fail sometimes you. didn't have a panic attack. okay you didn't have anything and you. called me out in that way another thing.
you call me. how was that you've been doing lately. which i don't like let me just get this. out of the way. i love you so much okay i love you too. is you look at this weird crazy spider. on my microphone. yeah george you deserve it look at that. here's another thing that you've been. doing. oh he's repelling this week yeah that's. been driving me cray cray. what is it you call me it. i want to save his life though i'll put. him in a bag. see see what happens my therapist told. me this is going to happen.
i have a resentment i'll save you for. later i have a resentment. you mean i have i'm no it's fine i'm. brave enough. i'm brave enough to bring it up and. then there's a spider so a lot's been. going on. in the news and in the social cycle. and you know what did i do i called you. this week to talk to you about a few. different things no. you've been calling me this is the first. this is what you've been doing did you.
get it. [Laughter]. right i did no twice he did it but you. still don't know. i do know you don't i do. because you got it no you got it i. didn't. you got it no it didn't you didn't get. it no. they gave it to i don't know uh they. don't tell you that on the phone. you can ask your agent yeah but i didn't. even ask they go you didn't get it. i don't know if i got it or not you got. it no i got a call. saying they love me they love you right.
and they like my audition told you right. see. and they're what are you doing on your. videos not even listening that's what. she's been doing lately. who are you here are you out here no. because. i'm reading my school's emails oh oh. [ __ ] oh [ __ ] you [ __ ] little [ __ ]. idiot [ __ ] liar. it's true yeah read it out loud what. does it say it is true because in the. car right over. she was reading emails she goes like. this 16th february 22. she kept saying that 16th february 22.
i go what are you [ __ ] saying right. now what is it she said i have to go. back to school. 16th or february 22 february 22nd you. need to go back. yeah is that what the email's about yeah. yeah so now you know the information. can you let it go and be in the present. moment and do the [ __ ] podcast. okay you're skating on thin icebergs oh. man. it's the thinnest ice irritating the. [ __ ] out of me right you know what we. should make you tell the secret that's. what we should make you do because of.
what you're up to. but let me say something to you andrew i. was hoping right. that i wasn't gonna get it just i can. give you [ __ ] about no but that's the. best part cause you're gonna get it and. then i can give you [ __ ] about it. but here's the deal here's the. stipulation what if you get it yeah. i have to fly over there with you you're. going to go to hungary. it's in budapest yeah is that where. hungary is. is hungary in budapest yeah okay yeah. that's. congress per capita hungary is the city. yeah budapest is the state i know that.
the country no budapest is the state oh. and it's within turkey. turkey's the citizens yeah the. citizenship the citizenship right. and lithuania and greeks are dirty. shellfish eating people they are yeah. they're dirty dirty hairy people. pieces of shits i know that [ __ ]. hunger is a [ __ ] country all right so. don't be dumb dumb okay. budapest you'll fly over there with me i. want to so bad i know but when i go to. hawaii you never show up. first of all first of all i asked you. yeah hey wouldn't it be cool if i came.
to hawaii and we did like a little bad. friends in hawaii. you know what you texted back what no. exactly. so what the [ __ ] are you saying i don't. i want you to fight for it oh you want i. want you to fight for hawaii. dude you don't want this love to be that. easy yeah i want you to go come on man. you know what i should just show up yeah. i mean given this dude. when i was in hawaii i had eight days. off and you did nothing. well i did stuff but kyla wasn't there. you were there alone yeah. i would wake up and i go why doesn't she. go with you because we have so many.
what are you doing nothing why do you. yeah you were. i'm checking the time the time that. we're at now yeah we just started. i mean i just wanted to check it again. i just i just checked the time wow oh. wow you know what if you don't want to. be here. yeah yeah if you don't how about this if. you don't want to be here too bad. because you have to you have to be here. yeah you have to otherwise you're you're. done for it yeah. you're gone here we haven't even thought. about here's what we haven't even. thought about yeah. she's getting accepted to colleges now.
oh no. i know so when do you go to college. september. so much yeah so now what college i don't. know yet. but you got accepted to one what'd you. get accepted to rude uh. devry university of phoenix online. cal state northridge no fullerton. okay that's that close close it's in. southern california that's anaheim. that's like fullerton's not far she. could still drive to come to the podcast.
she has to. if you go to fulton yeah you have to. what's the other one we don't know yet. how many did you apply to eight. eight of them eight schools which what's. your dream school. long beach yeah yeah long beach is a. great school shout out snoop dogg. wait the long beach long beach state. yeah yeah you know the home of the. what's their mascot you're not going to. get in. home of the what if their. administration's watching this right now. yeah. we're really interested in this ruby. girl rudy jewels the time to improvise.
blue whales home of the blue whales. [Laughter]. exactly long beach state uh uh. california state long beach. csulb home of the dirt bags that's their. baseball team. home with the dirt bags that's real yeah. that is real that is actually real yeah. and they have a big pyramid where their. basketball team plays. look there's one right look there it is. right there george is pulling up so you. can see it. what's their new s the new mascot's. called the lb. the lb is the as a shark click on the. images i'd like to see what the lb looks. like.
e-l-b-e-e the lb wow. okay okay what did it used to be. something racist they had to get rid of. it what's that guy next to it. [Laughter]. prospector peter jay leno. knows that that is literally janet leno. yeah yeah. yeah just take it for go trying to take. for some goat. so this guy got banned prospector pete. probably because it was embedded in some. sort of racial narrative that. they were like we got to get rid of it. mm-hmm can i say something else that's. so funny why that's. something i also have to admit yeah.
please and um. it's very difficult to admit it admit it. i will. so um how do i begin when you suggest. things. you know when i suggest what things to. watch or listen to. tv and film yeah yeah i do i've done a. great job you how many you how many. people commented and said. in and of itself so i'm going to talk. about that life-changing okay. and that boy i've got a list of new [ __ ]. to watch because we've been watching. okay can i just tell you about my story. get it out. okay so you you you brought up in and of.
itself. yes and i you know i go when you said it. i thought to myself. i'm never going to watch it i will not. want i. will not i refuse right yeah. so i'm at home right and i'm just i'm. hulu. right i skim right i'm skimming skimming. you know they have the little things. we suggest this yeah you know you might. like this yeah and i. i run past it yeah [ __ ] it. just out of spite yeah i just buy it.
dick so i go you know what dude. i think i should watch it because i know. i'm not gonna like it i know that. whatever he says. i know that whatever he says about it. right is absolutely wrong. right and so i'm just going to watch it. out of spite right. so that i can come back to the podcast. and go [ __ ] you. i wait you you owe me two hours of my. life or whatever it might be. okay right you waste significantly more. than two hours of your own life on dumb. [ __ ] so. go ahead okay i don't like the way. you're [ __ ] holding that [ __ ]. glass by the way. it's the biggest cup we've got okay so.
i'm watching it five minutes in. five minutes in my eyes are going. i told you i'm not being i'm not kidding. you i told you i. had to push pause because you're both oh. god. oh god i was so good right and i hated. myself for it by the end of the movie. yeah you were moved weren't you not. moved. snot bubbles i'm not kidding you.
i'm trembling right yeah oh my god that. was life-changing. right and i could call it you have to. watch this yeah you guys. well you facetimed me yeah and collide. was in the background and she i. why didn't you watch it with her in the. first place because she doesn't she's. worse than. when it comes to you yeah she's worse. why. because we just don't trust you. [Laughter]. you think we don't trust you you don't. [ __ ] you don't trust my. we don't you don't trust me i think i'm.
beginning to a little bit you should. all right you should now i'm beginning. did you just you didn't see it yet no. no no it's amazing yeah it is amazing so. what i'm saying is is that. and other people i've read on twitter. that you suggested it have watched it. and they go thank you they love it. i'm telling you right now now you get a. second person. to validate okay okay i'm saying that. it's i'll tell you why i like it and. i'll tell you why it's genius. i'm not gonna give anything away no. don't i'm not.
but he's taking two performance arts. mediums. correct combining them combining them. yeah right. and it's very authentic and original but. it's also very life-affirming. and it's just well done yes yeah and. it's like. it's just it you can tell you know they. say people say this a lot about. um you're not good at whatever your art. is until you hit your ten thousand hour. mark. you know whether it's music or fashion. or comedy or writing or perform. and you can tell that this is.
uh he said ten thousand dollars oh yeah. you know what i mean like you can tell. when someone. it's almost like when you watch a good. comedy special or listen to a great. album when you go. these guys have really put in some. [ __ ] work. yeah it's just like it comes together. it's like. card tricks for instance sure right i. would never be able to do it. never because i just know that i'll be. doing it right. fan right and i'll be doing it i'll and. i'll already in my head go. i [ __ ] up already i mean i don't know. where the ace is. right i lost it it was supposed to be.
here on this finger yeah i was supposed. to be controlling it yeah. and i lost the control it's in some. guy's pocket you put the ace in me. already. yeah yeah no it's just you just can't do. magic you can tell that he. you okay you know who else i i got into. this weekend oh here we go. i got into on hbo max there's a show. called um. painting with john do you know that show. no john laurie. look up john lewis it's a series. so he had an original one called do you. know who this is no man. john lure you don't know what it says i.
don't know don't worry it's crazy. mr uh mr look at there he is it's funny. to think that you mr. snob artistic snob rat brat don't know. who he is because he is a. god in the artistic community okay can i. one of anthony bourne's. best friends ordains his name one of. anthony bourdain's. best friend i know who he was can i say. something to you. your attitude right now so he was a. newbie he's a musician a painter. i know this right oh you know who he is. yeah you don't know who he is yes i do. he's my a sponsor.
[Laughter]. see that's how you improvise yeah that. just makes you up okay this guy's got a. show about painting and. i'm gonna say something about art though. okay yeah i don't know much about it. correct and i've never claimed on the. show. that i was an art connoisseur no but you. think you're a high brow. artist i'm not and i don't like the way. you're doing that with your fingers you. like you like you don't like eyebrows. you like highbrow. i don't do this no you want to be a part. of a high brow community. yeah yeah yeah but you're not you're. beanie you know what i know you know you. know. where you know what i am what lowbrow.
yeah you're very low yeah i'm very low. bro and we might be throwing gang signs. yeah these might be gangsters but i'm. going to tell you right now dude. i've never claimed that i don't know any. okay how about this let's do a contest. it's not that you don't claim it name me. 20 artists. just off the history of the world go. ahead. 20 15. we're going to sit here while i. go through them yeah yeah i want to know. artists of any kind yes really yeah. mediums you know what i mean but i can. pick music i can pick no no no. in terms of just um painting either if.
it be you know. abstract or picasso there we go. rembrandt here we go. renoir deng go ahead uh uh jackson. pollock. bingo uh i can use him john laurie. there we go uh um. it is weird to name uh yeah that's why i. like doing that it's very hard i mean i. don't know anything about painting but. yeah. let's name some more painters uh um.
uh donaldo no there's no donald trump. yeah there is. tell me if there's a donald though i'll. let it slide don't know. go ahead i'll give you donald though. donald donald. um uh warhol very good. i guess yeah uh basquiat but very good. but whatever. i love bosque out i know you do you see. exactly this is what i mean love it. take it take a time out we're on eight. okay you would love. dali yeah salvador dali you would love. basquiat you know why why.
because people have this affinity for. that guy. even though what he made was only. revolutionary because he was like. a black artist in new york when it was. all white hoity-toity outside of that. his stuff wasn't that good. basquiat's stuff wasn't that good none. of it was like. wow oh my god all basquiat stuff was. fine it was like yeah that's fine art i. guess it's good it's good but it wasn't. mind-blowing it wasn't it was just. unique because he was a young black. artist in an all-white world. which is credible but this isn't that.
good. that's very good this isn't that good. very good that's fine. so you rudy can do that i'm gonna say. this all right rudy can do that. you're the type look look look you're. very good not so good yeah. or can i just say this bring up a renoir. bring up a runway all right renoir but. stop it that's my point but can i see. this. let me see what i want to say okay let. me see what look at that. look at that scissors oh realism look at. that fat look at that fight. fat white girl by the water han can make. a [ __ ] realistic planning painting.
like oh. yeah that's my uncle you know what. you're you know how technical that is. yeah and basquiat was like oh really so. you're like all right so you. right you think that basket blah blah. right yeah what about this guy. whatever your guy right here right. putting the [ __ ] brush. in the paint can and just doing this. jackson pollock go [ __ ] yourself i don't. know. my art has been commended as being. strongly vaginal i just named him okay.
what's a good asian artist then. people i know who david cho you name one. that's that's the only one get off a. show no i'm not gonna he's a personal. friend of mine give me another one. give me another one give me another. asian artist that you love um. i can't better help. oh boy um during this pandemic nothing. has helped me more than. better help therapy has saved my life um. i go through trauma therapy through. better help it's. really improved my life and um is there.
something interfering with your. happiness or preventing you from. achieving your goals. yeah there are many probably a lot of. things yeah better help will assess your. needs. and match you with your own licensed. professional therapist you can start. communicating in under 48 hours. it's not a crisis line it's not. self-help it's professional counseling. done securely online tell them more andy. look it's a broad range of expertise. available and uh i gotta tell you. we both use therapy we've talked about. on the show a lot it's a big proponent. of our lives and i think. it helps everybody for everything that. you're going through all right. better help they're committed to. facilitating great therapeutic matches.
they make it easy for you to change. counselors if need be. uh better help just want you to live a. happier life i know a lot of people are. weird about therapy trust me it's. definitely worth it just try it out. uh so many people been using it uh all. over. uh so give yourself uh give yourself a. break and get some get a little help. visit betterhelp.com. bad friends that's help help join over. over a million people who have taken. charge of their mental health. with the help of an experienced. professional through better betterhelp. that's right special offer for the bad. friends listeners get 10. off your first month at betterhelp.com.
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put that side by side with a basket. george. look at how beautiful that looks and now. show me. show me whatever [ __ ] candle they're. selling at urban outfitters with a. basket [ __ ] label written on it. that's what they do now they sell this. stuff. oh show me no go back go back go back go. go to boxer that's one of his most. famous yeah yeah. yeah look at this click on boxer make it. big. images usually help there it is all. right. right there look at this can i say. something about my niece.
when you have a realism don't ever do. that again this is my mind oh that's. right. okay so what i'm saying is that let's. calm down for a second okay yeah why did. we get so hot because you're not mad. about the artist thing. i know because um you know a lot of. artists can do realism. all right i knew dudes in art class in. high school that could draw my face. okay really technical yeah tough face to. draw. to face to draw okay it's unique it's.
not it's round but i just do slits it's. round but it has. you just do a circle two slits a mouth. and two holes it's like a smiley face. yeah all right it's very easy to do you. have a smiley face. is that no one could do what bosque did. because that's an original. that comes from his mind so what do you.
mean david chopin's nothing original. no he does but i'm just saying if. there's more realism it's it's. abstract there's you could right these. are you can look it up david chopin. although he's a friend of mine he's very. talented right and compared to other. people's right. but with basquiat when you see a. basquiat you know that it's him. yeah it's yes because it's uniquely bad. because it looks like a. child no no it looks like a child's. painting. children do it all the time do that all. the time. all the time no they can't you know what. i'm gonna show you every fridge and. every fridge in sherman oaks every.
parent's like look at it. brayden did yeah braden does that yeah. that looks like finger paint for braden. and uh what's your you can't compare. also i know these are two different. kinds of art i understand you can't. compare. right like a movie like elf great film. great film and a movie like mean streets. yes you can no you can't elf. [Laughter]. right and apocalypse now.
elf is better it's not [ __ ] better. elf is better. is that better it's not better you know. it's not better. you know it's not better you're just. saying that give me something else that. you think will beat out because i'm. telling you right now elf is still. winning. for okay memorable lines uh uh the. characters i'll give you another one. i'll give you one okay elf okay. versus um the original star wars. oh that's tough two different movies. that's very tough.
okay how about elf or the original alien. two different movies you can't compare. the two i'm gonna go. with of course elf. yeah you know what i'm saying you can't. compare art right it's hard it's hard my. point is. when i see basket stuff i know it's his. stuff compare the yeah. compare the rotten tomatoes between. compare the red. right between between elf what do they. get. well 84 do you go by tomato score or.
audience score. not audience you don't do because half. of those guys are [ __ ] trump. supporters. what do you mean margery taylor green. what's the tomato score then who are. they. what people that know what film no. no these are film people are they are. they the ones that are buying all the. box office tickets no that's the people. matter. yeah but the critics don't matter no no. no. now we're going into a [ __ ] person. and here's why i let me say something. here's what happened at the golden. globes. all these names were released and. everybody was like this what what is. this no one watched anything yeah.
because. that's why you have the golden globes. and you have the people's choice awards. no people trust me no one watches the. people choice awards that's not a real. thing you don't have a [ __ ]. you don't have a [ __ ] people's choice. awards a party my come on over let's. watch. golden globes should be about the people. the. emmys should be about the the the. the uh academy listen okay. when you by the way you and i are never. going to any of these things. we're never going to get invited you.
know what i am no you're not. i am you'll go to the razzies no i will. go to the emmys one day you'll go to the. lucy's or the aziz. what were you working interviewed. [Laughter]. twice you were interviewing people yeah. i think senator william h mason. can i ask you a question there you go. okay and the second thing is you're not. gonna go to the emmys yes i am you're. not. you'll go with somebody's guest i'm. gonna take you as my guest no no and i. can't wait. holy [ __ ] [ __ ] it no no stop stop if. dave let me finish if dave gets.
nominated i'm taking it as my guess i. can't wait. i'm not going to take my wife and get. invited to the [ __ ] emmy he's not. going to go in your face you're not. going to go yes i am you're not going to. go. oh you're saying i'll get invited but. when i won't go oh no i'm saying you. won't go you won't get invited i will. get invited for what. what are the show that i just sold to. abc no i'm not going to win anything. it's so negative i love it but i'm going. to say this okay. yeah is that that got 84 percent right. what did alien get. what's alien george 95. no oh that's mean streets obviously.
obviously i mean streets is a. come on but you said earlier alien got. what. what an alien 98 90 higher than means. trees right so my point. that means alien is better than mean. streets right your point is right you're. right and it's also better than elf. in this world yes but but my point is. you can ride the tomatoes. you can't compare the two we just did i. know but that's one thing maybe some. other site. would have some other opinion my point. is is that they're two different [ __ ]. artists subjective right but someone's.
got to judge at some point. right so and also kind of make this. argument too is is that there have been. bands where people. you go oh why would anyone buy a creed. album that's what millions of people do. it's a great band. oh my god great band great music. you're [ __ ] you you're really doing. it you're a chad right now. nothing against creed nothing against. that what i'm saying is. that you know you can compare you know. it's just like it's not. great i would never buy it and it's like.
i think people in. hordes like stuff that aren't good. you can because you can't trust people. you can only compare it on a. technical level right you can't go creed. is not as good of a band that term not. as good of a band. as um any of them. stop it because they are better than. some of them okay. creed is not as good of a band as the. black keys right you could say that. yes and then someone would go well i. don't like the black keys i love creed.
but you. can say crazy that person creed is a. [ __ ] heart. okay you can say creed isn't as. musically um. technically talented as a black and. that's a more validation you look at an. a creed album right and then you look at. okay computer. sure right outside right side by side. yeah. it's not even a [ __ ] okay computer. blows it out of the water. all right it's a masterpiece i don't i'm. saying i just i got. i agree from beginning to end it's a.
[ __ ] masterpiece i agree but there's. people out there that don't. yeah and those people are the ones that. [ __ ] make review and. tomato i don't trust them that's my. point. yeah but some of those people are also. the tomatoes. listen i i know this and this is maybe. why some people call me an elitist. that's what it is an elitist. you're driving crazy today but okay so i. might be a little bit of an elitist.
right. but there are certain things that are. good that's why when i. even when you say i'm not going to that. fine okay that might be true. all right i'm kidding you can go if you. want i don't what do i no no no let me. tell you something. not only is your show your show is going. to get an emmy a golden globe. and it's going to be the first. television show that gets an oscar. your show all right you know you're. being a [ __ ] [ __ ] and you'll get a. grant that's impossible you're going to. get an ego all right. so what i'm saying though is. oh god my throat is.
my throat i can't even swallow what. we're saying is you know what neither of. us know what we're talking about we do. i mean let me just close out my [ __ ]. close enough close out my [ __ ] uh. argument close it up papa. is i do know there are just certain. things right in terms of. art right that are more creative. um more relevant more um. you know putting their finger on what's. going on. on the planet for the world right.
culture. culture and there's some albums are just. put out. right quickly yeah right through some. sort of like. corporate machine yeah right and it's. only there so that people the masses. what is that the them that's the masses. right they'll go buy it. right right and those and i'm i'm not. necessarily. you know going to listen to them when it. comes to film. okay okay who do you listen to because.
you have it's like it's like those. patriots. they say america america is the greatest. country. in the world when a lot of them have. never even visited other countries how. do they know right. well you don't need to go anywhere when. you're in the best i. you're not going to leave a morton. steakhouse and go to an. that's a good one all right my point. though right being is is that. a lot of these people go this movie is. the greatest move in the whole world.
when they haven't seen being there or. paris texas or you don't mean any of. these you know what i mean. but maybe it's the best to them and. that's. still okay no but some of them say it's. the best of all time. this movie is the best oh have you seen. you know i mean any kurosawa film or. have you seen but there is no best of. all time it doesn't exist there are. there is no best there's there's there. are 50 films. right that most people that critique. films. right and have seen all the films will.
say. that generally we we're pretty confident. that these. 50 right are in the best films of all. time yeah but we don't know what's. coming next. i know what i'm saying is is that i'll. tell you that citizen kane will probably. always be on that list it'll be on a. list because of some of the best films. but it won't be for it won't be forever. times will change my friend. yo i'm sure in the [ __ ] in the. [ __ ] uh parliamentary days. that they thought uh finger flicking.
they were like this is the illest [ __ ]. of all and it still is. it's not it's not really yeah that's not. that you don't put it on anymore. you don't i use the chopin all the. [ __ ] times i don't like pants because. i do. when's the last time he's played chopin. inside the house. i don't know who's exactly she doesn't. know. she doesn't know let me name me six. composers right now. this is tough six composers wait i.
forgot everything already because. it's pressure you can't name one. we just named one um. okay we'll give you clues we'll give you. a question we'll give you a pleasure. okay how about this all right there we. go. one of them one of them was they did a. movie about a dog. a big hairy dog big hairy dog but that's. the composer's name and the guy and john. what was the actor's name he used to. yell his name. the the dog's name all the time yeah. yeah he used to go.
it starts with a b yeah b bae it starts. with bae. bae i don't know how to pronounce it say. it try it try it. [Music]. beethoven wow that's good that was very. difficult okay what's another one. right there's another guy right. his first name right was the guy that. makes pizzas. right there's a famous guy that makes.
fancy pizzas in beverly hills that's. right. has the same name as a composer. i don't know okay his middle name is his. middle name. his middle name is amadeus. i don't know she doesn't know wolfgang. amadeus mozart. mozart wolf game amadeus puck there's a. great restaurant where you go in there. and you jam out to class. you've never heard of them i heard of. him mozart you know. about beethoven right bach.
kind of yeah yeah kind of bach yeah yeah. i've learned in therapy today okay i. forgot. what day it is therapy day it's therapy. day so um. i went to therapy this morning too i. like to affirm my paranoia okay. like yeah all right so. um what i did was friday night you know. i'm on a show magnum. yeah yeah and one of the older episodes.
aired and some guy in twitter goes. bobby lee literally is the worst actor. right and who is and who is this guy. well then today he made fun of my penis. so i know that he has something against. me. i'm sorry guys it was it was andres oh. my god. andres it was you i'd laugh so hard and. you're fired. but what i do then is this so i i read. the tweet right. why because you're scrolling and then. you kind of. i know right so this is what i said this.
is what my third therapist got so mad at. me today. so this is what i do i go i read the. tweet and i go oh [ __ ]. maybe he's right no i know it's crazy. it's insane so what i do is this. i produce a i i text a producer. oh cause you want where i go so was it. bad. which is like not good man. and i do that when i take takes like if. i don't think that the cake is good you. ask. no but i'll hang out by video village.
no i really will i'll let like if you're. the director i'll just stand around like. this. they're resetting a difference you want. to do a watch playback is that why. no no i'll just kind of go do you get it. and my therapist goes you can no longer. do that ever you can't that's so bad for. you. i know i don't do it in a desperate. needy way no it's not desperate. i do it in a very i just kind of like. i'll whistle do. you know you know i'll play with my feet. a little bit right i and. if they lock eyes they'll go you get it.
yeah we got it we're moving on come on. why are you so insecure about it. once you know once it's locked it's over. i understand that. i don't know but it's just like i'm just. things that i'm learning in therapy. that's all. and your therapist said no longer you're. going to do it i can no longer do that. but is there a way that you can check. yourself to make sure you don't do it. again i have to self-soothe. you do i have to self-suit and the way i. go i don't even know what that means so. what. she said was um because i've had i don't. know why but i'm um. for some reason like i'll just give you. an example i can't tell you who but.
like this always used to happen to me. like i'd be on stage this is like in. 15 years ago like i'd be at the improv. yeah i'd be on stage. and a female comic would walk in right. with a black eye i'm not kidding you. with a black guy can i know who. you know i can't tell you who damn it. and she'd be like look at me. she would look at me i was that guy that. you hit her no. but she would have to talk to me i was. like i was like. the female comics tampon right.
right yeah where where like female. combos would go you know what i mean. yeah this guy was really aggressive with. me what do i do you know i mean i was. that guy did you do anything about the. gut. no no but i you know i'm just you know. so i. i'm good at soothing other people yeah. what i'm saying. so how i deal with other people right. i'm to do it to myself. right that's how i'm going to self-suit. that's good yeah yeah so stop spending. time trying to soothe for others. you self-soothe yeah self-self.
soothes i'm trying to self-soothe myself. ship station. oh we would be nothing without ship. station all of our merch. ships out of the ship station use this. service. in at bad friends here so if you bought. some of our merch which and if you. haven't what are you doing. buy some uh we use shipstation through. that because it's. incredible and if you sell stuff online. you're definitely in the right business. more people are shopping online more. than ever. that means a lot of orders coming in and. a lot of others. you'll need to be shipped out fast.
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on the internet uh you really should be. using shipstation. use our offer code bad friends to get a. 60 day free trial that's two months free. no hassle stress free shipping just go. to shipstation.com click on the. microphone on the top of the page and. type in. bad friends shipstation.com enter code. bad friends to get a 60 day free trial. that's right. two months free of no hassle stress free. shipping that's right shipstation.com. enter code bad friends make ship happen. hello fresh you know what andy yeah bob. i love hello fresh how do i.
yeah hello fresh is one of my favorite. if you don't know what it is come on. wake up you get. fresh pre-measured ingredients and. mouth-watering seasonal recipes. delivered right to your front door. you can do it yourself i can't yeah it's. it imagine this. i'm stupid and i can do it yeah you're. your own chef boyardee. yeah oh yeah yeah nice and i put on my. little mittens and my little apron and. your little hat and my little hat. chef and when i get hello fresh and i. know the meal is gonna be good. it's gonna be delicious one of the best. guess who cooked the hellofresh meal. yesterday what andy who. me bobo me yeah i cooked it.
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shipping that's right go to. hellofresh.com. bad friends 10 use the code bad friends. 10 for 10 free meals including. free shipping i already said that andy. it says say it again bob. okay it really is america's number one. meal kit true and what do you have to do. with rudy that's dude you can't sue. you don't no no soothing she um has a. thing with me. is that um and it it'll it it may never. work out. our relationship may never work out. i have to say that and that's real but.
she's going to college not working out. six months. and i'll tell you why right is she. doesn't she has a thing where. she doesn't come to me with any problems. she ha she well. that's why she's having panic attacks. she goes to kalila obviously or she's. burying it no she goes to kalila with. all her problems. and i hear her problems via kalila right. yeah she just you know this happened she. would never say it to me. why i'll come in the kitchen and she'll.
just this is what she does i'll walk in. the kitchen. and let's say she's standing right here. as soon as i walk she'll just go around. the counter. to avoid you to avoid me yeah but also. to be fair to her you can be very. volatile at times. am i ever volatile and be real. sometimes like in what way and this is. good and i think we should do this right. now no. i think this is the moment it's not. negative it's not negative so what is. the thing that i do that's volatile. i just let it out go ahead like you. explain where i go. like far away when you come in in the.
kitchen. it's because you always want to punch me. you want to punch her oh. god she's so silly you. [ __ ] know you [ __ ] rat time out. was the story with the girl with the. black eye was that rudy. wait a minute what does he where does he. punch you let her talk where does he. punch you. where yeah like on the arm or in the. stomach or on the what does he do. arm he hits you on the arm hard. sometimes hard sometimes hard come over.
here. come punch me how he hits you come here. with your mouth or your mouth i want to. feel it. wear your mask i want to feel how hard. it gets you. and be real okay i'll be i'll i'll be. okay i'll be you and you be bob okay. ready yeah okay oh hi tito bobby. hi oh good morning. okay honestly yeah that was hard. i have never hit her that hard i.
i just saw the weight of it but can i. tell you something you don't know your. strength. okay so maybe you are hitting her harder. than you think and she's a little you. know. she's a tiny little girl i do it as a. joke yeah. i do it as a joke oh you hit women as a. joke. no playful in a playful way oh oh it's. funny. [Laughter]. so here's what here's the deal now that. i hear it now right. i hear it now i hear it now right yeah. i won't do that again okay so is that.
the reason why. you you don't come to me with your. feelings and your and what you're going. through. no what is it you don't trust me. i no i trust you i just go to the kalila. okay but let's say this what do you. think it would take. from bobo for you to say. i want to tell you something personal. that's bothering me. what would it take i don't know. you don't know because the communication.
seems open he seems like he's really. well. willing to do something if no like even. when we get into the car today right i. go we'll go coming here. yeah and i go um hey. i open with that yeah hey you. you creepy aunt yeah did i not do that. yeah hey. i didn't do anything i just looked at. her and go hmm. i did one of those things because you. could tell she was upset yeah i make one. of those noises too like. [Music].
you you you're doing okay. right yeah she was not fine not fine. yeah she's not fine. you're not [ __ ] she can't really get. that. no i see to bobby as like the fun. and like always positive um. uncle that's nice here's another thing. yeah and i'm tired. of you calling kalila your sister. right who she's your aunt right and you. call me uncle. yeah right so maybe that has maybe it's.
because you put me in a role you're. right. yeah you put me in a some weird like. adult. role because you're old okay. okay okay well bro bro she's 19. you're 49 you are very much the grown-up. in this situation like okay. she's an adult a young adult and you are. a. what's the word you used um tito no no. no what you said he is what he's. old old enough you're an old adult i'm.
old okay. okay so let me feel like gross old yeah. i'm not and. i'm not offended by the word old right. but you're old. i know okay you stop. whatever you're doing whatever you're. doing right now i'm not doing anything. yeah you're getting me all riled up. time out let's take a break let's see. yeah it was this girl that used to. she would comic and her comedian. boyfriend used to punch her. oh my really that was crazy i gotta know.
the name and i'll tell you later but um. it would be i would be like in north. hollywood at a. bar show mm-hmm it should show up with. scratches on her face. oh my god how'd you know it's performing. here you know what i mean. and this guy is still around he's. killing it he's doing well yeah. but back in the day it was like the old. west and comics acted you know a fool. they acted crazy back then sure yeah i. mean but also. acting crazy hitting somebody is a.
little it's way too much that's. different. yeah that's not being like a drone coupe. you know. who who who throws them at the bar at. the improv and pulls their dick out. which that happened at the improv i saw. that yeah that's different than. hitting a woman in the face i mean come. on right and and speaking of hitting. women. so are you no longer going to hit rudy. that's a thing i i i thought it was a. joke. but don't you think i know and i bet you. it was loving but don't you think now. she gets to hit you a few times isn't. that only fair. she can hear me all that she wants no.
why. i'm not violent you love knives. yeah you're you're a secret violent. crazy person you just. are pretending that you're this sweet. everyone loves online rudy's personality. your other uncle what not your uncle but. your great uncle. chopped his brother in half of the. machete oh. yeah oh yeah. your grandfather your grandfather she. took a machete yeah not kidding you.
went to her his brother's her other. grandfather. right she took a machete right and in. the torso. just this part right oh sliced him in. complete half. right imagine the blood. right right and he just he went to. prison got out. you can get out you can keep that that's. what's great about the philippines. philippines you cut someone in half. by the way you go to prison for life for. weed yeah yeah here. you cut someone in half and they're like.
and so one time you'd be out in 15 years. and i knew this about him so when i met. him that guy for the first time. yeah oh my god i nearly sucked this. chick. i was just like i went i gave him a hug. he's like whispering. i go whatever you need man i sort of got. whatever you need man. he killed his brother yeah and why why. what was it. why money money you know it's always. money. isn't it dude he cut up. his brother in half because how much. money do you know um.
i think his brother i don't know sold. the house. to get money and then he got angry so. he's like that japanese kid went to. school in. france right in this japanese kid this. really happened. recently no like 20 years ago i went to. school in france. and um you could look it up but um he. was um in boarding school whatever. and his parents were wealthy and he just. decides one day i don't know what came. over him you know we have bad days.
you know he decides to eat somebody and. um. you know he just kind of had that mind. like i want to eat that lady you know. so he eats another student wow yeah yeah. whole like head to toe i don't know what. he i i've never eaten a human so i don't. know what the good parts are. i know what the good parts are yeah and. then what happened was ah. sagawa was that him yeah it's gotta be. known as the karat. known as the what yeah. the kobe the kobe cannibal that's a cool.
name yeah it's really good. and then his parents were so rich they. got him out of france. oh so he was never extradited back. different he went back to no he he was. in france when it happened. he got to japan no and they never took. him back no he was able to come out of. france. and then he just was never charged right. now he's just walking around that's what. i'm saying they never extradited him to. the best story at parties look at this. guy and he's 71. and he's still alive. a long time ago then he's 71 he's still. doing it 50 years he got arrested but. released two years after pre-trial.
detention. wow bad bad and then he was gone yeah so. like in some parts of the world you know. you can eat somebody. and it's all good it's good well it. depends how many people are starving a. misdemeanor yeah it's like a parking. ticket. yeah yeah you got a cannibal ticket yeah. uh speaking of. france so uh i just read this morning. the police this is happening all over. the world the police just broke up. an 81 person orgy 81 people. from all over the world they flew in. from nine countries and they got fined.
this is the funniest part they got fined. they could find because of covet laws. yeah guess how much guess how much they. each got fined every person 81. 135 dollars that's it that's a lot. that's nothing for a north these people. flew for an orgy. yeah they flew across the world to [ __ ]. somebody 835. is nothing i'll pay that fine i want to. go to the orgy. how come i don't get invited to these. orgies have you been in an orgy. no no no on my own being real no i'm. serious i've never been in orgy i've.
never been to one i've never seen one i. want to see him i want to go. a free orgy you've never been in a free. order and i instigated it. i don't want to get into it but i wasn't. the one that let's do it today how many. people is in orgy. mine was six what makes an orgy more. than four i don't know what it is i. don't know what the rules can you google. what makes an origin it makes an orgy. but mine was six an orgy is a wild party. especially one involving excessive. drinking and. unrestrained sexual activity that's all. stupid i'm having orgies all the time. yeah yeah yeah yeah.
wait there's gotta be that's an oxford. that's oxford dictionary said that. an orgy has to be a number right yeah. because like greek orgies. there were there were like 50 to 100. people think of how fun that would be. yeah what a party and by the way are you. afraid to pull my dick on everyone. laughing. no one's paying attention you don't. think so no you know how embarrassing. would that be though you show up you're. like. hey guys and then everyone just does an. applause break the record stops. i would probably put it back on and. leave do you know why you know why.
orgies were invented. why do you know why seriously so guys in. the hubbub. of it all yeah when all this like. everyone's [ __ ] and sucking and. moaning. so a guy that wanted to [ __ ] guys yeah. could sneak it in and be like oh i. didn't i. didn't know i wasn't really 100 yeah. it's so guys could. right in a guy's butt and be like oh i. just thought you were a girl but at this. point it's like. why am i so friendly okay let me ask you. this if you were an orgy. right and you're [ __ ] girls closing. my eyes i'm doing it right yeah yeah. yeah. you're right and then all of a sudden. you know like all of a sudden like um.
before he died dustin diamond's there oh. all right please. jesus christ soon literally just said. well i just suppose dustin diamond was. there i rest in peace screech. you're great you're a great dude and you. know he's having sex. i don't know if he was a great dude i. take that back he's having sex with yeah. and you look at his ass cheeks and you. know the perfect asses you've ever asked. you've ever seen. his ass is so nice so nice yeah would. you just. yeah you would right no would you stick. your dick digging. nah you know what for me boys butts are. too hairy.
no but it doesn't even it's like it's. like a brazilian woman's butt oh then. yeah yeah yeah it has the tan lines and. everything oh it's got that baby. and it sticks out then yeah. his whole body is white but his ass for. some reason is super perfectly tan. yeah what is that. seven is probably a really mild semi. orgy oh so i have world. that really wasn't in one you haven't. had one you had to have seven you need. seven. but but also so the six that you had. yeah how do you. how do you what do you say do you switch.
out condoms. do you i don't know because i it'd be. weird to like use a condom. let's say you're doing guys and girls. you're [ __ ] some guy in the ass. right yeah you pull it out there's some. [ __ ] and you see a vagina do you stick. it back you go. go in there or do you. yeah i guess i don't know but i would. another i imagine that most of these. unbridled orgies don't have condoms oh. yeah yeah. that's weird you know don't you think. yeah there's no way. yeah otherwise otherwise those should be. sponsored by trojan they should put some.
money into the orgy game yeah yeah but i. just think how do you. first of all all this means to me when i. read it what i really wanted to talk. about was yeah. how do you get invited to that kind of. like 81 people right. i'm not don't laugh at me i want to know. how you get invite. that's a privilege your six people are. people that you knew correct. no i i i did i tell you about the asian. orgy. that i almost got involved in famous. agent or asian orgy. sometimes after sets at the comedy store. right i go to the [ __ ] um.
carnies carnies i know i've been with. you it's embarrassing right and i get. the chocolate i know why do you get that. so delicious. i love bananas and chocolate you love a. chocolate banana so it's frozen and i'm. like a little kid yeah sucking on a. black dick. walking down sunset and then yeah and i. love when like fans will come out of the. showroom and they'll walk to their cars. whatever they'll get good job and i'll. always do like a dick sucking i think. that's so fun right and they always get. to laugh yeah of course like a great job. i'll go oh. like then it gets a huge laugh right so.
this time it was like maybe. 1 1 30 in the morning and i'm walking. back and this is when i was dating sarah. a girl inside i remember her okay so. yeah uh yeah never mind i'm not gonna. say her name all right so i was. um in the hyatt there right there was. probably. 200 asians all dressed in white. a white party right yeah and i and then. this is when like um mad tv i was on mad. tv. so i was on a show and and asians. especially because i was the only really. guy. you're the only asian guy on tv so they.
all knew who i was right. yeah think oh my god it's bobby lee. right. and they go you want to come up i go. what's going up there. and i have the chocolate you know i'm. sucking right getting trying to get. laughs right. and they're like let's we're a sex um. club you immediately you're like this is. fake. yeah i go no i what. it is what is it yeah we rented out the. whole floor. and you're invited i'm usually at the. club it's a club but you can come up. and i go i don't know what it was so i.
go all right i'll go. i'm gonna go well you'd go right all. right well i'm gone. i'm there in my mind right so you know. how hotel rooms. the doors each door is there's a door. that's. locked to the other door those are all. open. so you can walk through pass-throughs. pass through all these. right these rooms wow right right right. yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah. so and there's music right and you know. at first nothing was happening people. are just talking right is there anybody. i'm at the tail end of my chocolate.
thing you know my. face is all chocolated up right. my taillight and then all of a sudden. like dudes are just taking their clothes. off. i think they were just making out are. these people hot oh my god people are. hot or not. so everybody's hot yeah i'm the only i'm. the ugliest guy there obviously all. right yeah yeah i wouldn't. if i didn't have mad tv i would never be. invited you're right. okay plus you didn't have white on so. those guys you know me and kissing girls. and i was kind of walking around. like i i think i gotta get out of here. were you talking to anybody no.
no just by yourself so i go to this room. and i go this seems like a nice room. there's candles right. and there's no guys it's all women oh no. right yeah. so there's these two girls on the bed. and i'm sitting there on like just a. hotel. chair right my feet are all chocolatey. i'm. trying to think to myself should i um. have a stick around on the balcony this. is weird right. yeah but no i'll watch and they're. hooking up oh yeah they're eating each. other. right that's great nice cover your ears. okay. yeah i go but i should go because i was.
living with sarah at the time. you're allowed to watch i know exactly. i'm watching so right i was gonna. you know what i'm gonna nut in my pants. because i was with the nut in my pants. yeah right yeah just explode without. even touching it's amazing that's when. your dick is going like that. it's begging to get out right and then i. see the girls look at me. yeah right and they go they start. whispering. meanwhile when they're whispering my. penis is going.
like juice is coming out right. right yeah and also i'm like all my like. spidey senses are. like like you're you're you're in a. territory. yeah where you don't want to be here. correct right yeah. but i can't move can't move right you. didn't go no my body's like. leave but i'm not leaving no you can't. yeah i know you can't yeah all right so. they get up from the bed. right walk through you and they walk. toward me right.
and one girl starts kissing my neck and. i go like this i go. no with my hand like this why. i go no like this and i run out. wow yeah the control the control dude a. hot naked chick comes out i regret that. moment. every single day i should have done it. but i should have [ __ ] done it and i. regret it i'm not with her. wait when you were in the elevator did. was it not run into your head to be like. [ __ ] this [ __ ] i'm gonna go i gotta go. back up. i gotta go i know because the one thing.
that i can say about myself. is i've never cheated on anybody and you. were committed you were like i'm not. gonna do it with two random girls in. this hotel i wanted to and i wish. i did yeah you did yeah but i didn't in. your mind you did. i didn't because it just goes again you. wanted to i wanted. it so bad but it goes against everything. that i believe but but also. yeah you don't know those girls what. would you do done in that situation. there's no way i would have been. genuinely yeah i would have never.
if a guy was like come upstairs having a. sex party yeah i know to be like. that is trouble i'm no way i'm going up. there right i shouldn't have gone up. there. yeah because i knew you know because by. the way yeah if you go up there. at that point you should [ __ ] yeah you. went up. you already did it go do it yeah you did. it yeah yeah yeah. what is this what is this guy oh yeah oh. my god the religious guy okay. this guy's great so what is he look at. this though by the way cause god we. talked about save. we talked about saving you on this show. a lot no we've talked about saving.
people people being saved by religion oh. yeah. remember my buddy who was saved you know. yeah look at this this guy's out here. saving people and i want to give him a. lot of credit this guy's great don't. watch. porn pray with me instead my friend. started this new hashtag prayer watch. porn and i guarantee that you maybe have. been feeling a little bit tempted yeah. or maybe you were about to watch. something okay how much does this guy. love porn. too much the fact that he's got to say. it out loud it's too much. and that means he's put away yeah no he. needs to go to like a six-month like. lockdown these guys deserve to be in.
prison for this yeah this is prison this. the fact that he's got to say you as you. should pray to not watch porn yeah means. his addiction was so. violent yeah that it was like you know. what i saw and i'll never forget dude my. first time in new york so my first time. i ever. was in new york and i was going to visit. my buddy in brooklyn and i was like. i'm going to take the train you know. what i mean like i'll do the new york. thing i'm not going to take a cab. i'm taking the [ __ ] trip the moment i. get on the l train. a guy is on his phone watching porn dick. in hand. yeah i was like should have taken a.
[ __ ] cab that's this guy by the way. yeah that's this guy he's watching it in. public you see have you ever watched. seen someone watch it in public. watch porn in public no never i feel. like i see people doing i catch people. all the time watching porn in public no. really yeah maybe it's my group of. friends no it's just that it's just i. don't really um. well i haven't been out in so long i. know but i don't walk by and people are. watching i always think they're watching. the avengers or something. or you know some cool things i saw a guy. at the comedy store watching porn in the. o.r. yeah drunk as [ __ ] in the back of the. room watching porn on his phone yeah and.
honestly i didn't blame him. well i saw i you know there used to be i. didn't blame him at all um. a series of porn i think was i forgot. what company was but they rented. paulie's house. to do porn porn which one the one above. the store the. old one the old one way on the hill. you're right and every time i would. watch them i'd go oh yeah i've been. you know since i'm like i've been there. isn't that kind of nice. yeah yeah that's kind of nice to be like. i've been to that point yeah. especially when. wait did he get did he get paid good. money for that i don't but you know how.
he just rents that stuff that i know. would you ever rent your house off for. porn no look at me. porn company comes and goes bob if if. fans of you. okay if i wasn't in assa akira is. producing it. i've um no because i have [ __ ] jewels. in the house i have dogs you kick her. out. you're not there while they're doing it. oh yeah um it depends on. where i am financially they come to you. and they go look we're gonna rent the. house out and we'll give you we'll give. you 15 grand. no i don't need it we'll give you 25. grand no we'll give you 50 grand.
no we'll give you a hundred grand okay. how fast can you be out yeah. no how many how much do you need it for. one day yeah go ahead. 100 grand but we're gonna get come on. everything. there's already come on everything. well you know that's a you know a thing. and i got a text from a friend yeah. the other day that goes i couldn't be. more annoyed with you right now. why i go context and he goes.
you're stupid [ __ ] show is filming on. my street all week. so like you know they because they you. know they put up a notice that says i'm. filming on your. yeah in your neighborhood and and i was. like oh dude. sorry yeah that's got to be a bummer. because they blocked the streets you. know it's a whole thing. and he's like this guy's house that. we're filming in he rents it out all the. time for people that don't know. people in los angeles they rent out. their houses for film shoots all the. time. and they give you like i don't know 10. to 20 grand depending on how long they. use the house. but they wreck the house we rack the.
house i mean. yeah you wreck it and every time i. always think would i i would. never rent my house out to a hollywood. production never never. because you [ __ ] it up you [ __ ] it off. you leave [ __ ] everywhere things get. banged and knocked and broken. everything gets broken i always look. through the drawers yeah. because sometimes the green room is in. some kid's room it's a kid's room. right and you're in there it's like you. can tell that like. pictures up and yeah somebody kid lives. there somebody lives. and i go through things this one one.
time we were at. what were we shooting and we were in. someone's house and they had and they. had. tape on the doors that said do not enter. guess what what i entered. yeah yeah how am i not gonna check it. out i got to know what's in there. when i was shooting magnum and um we. were shooting. on the street and this [ __ ] guy with. a maga hat. right mm-hmm comes in he interrupts us. i hear action he interrupts the scene. and he goes. you guys are taking jobs away from. hawaiians.
and he walks away and the boom operator. it's just this gigantic brown guy you're. made with tattoos. but he's everyone's hawaiian. he's holding and just i'm a whim bro. yeah. we'll be right back. [Laughter]. do you have any games today rudy has a. project that. she wants to pitch to you guys rudy's. got a project. she's got a she's got a school. presentation she wants to practice i. have a school presentation oh great this. is exciting.
oh yeah she seems amped about it. do you see her face yeah i can tell that. you're down before we do this can i talk. to you. yeah yeah yeah get get into her heart. man are you sad. no can i can i be real with you for a. second. if you ever need to talk to someone. about are you on your phone. i'm gonna do the oh the presentation. okay if you ever need to talk to someone. about panic attacks. or anxiety you know you can you can. always text me she i'm being serious. maybe she will text you you'll text me.
she will. never i swear to god she'll never text. me i suffer from anxiety and depression. very much and i gotta tell you if you. ever need. if you ever want advice if you ever if. kalila and i died for some reason right. and she was homeless. yeah right and she needed a sandwich. you'd probably be the last person she'd. go to. last yeah cause. there's. [Laughter]. wow yeah and let that seep into your. [ __ ]. heart that's i mean all the stuff i've.
done for you is pretty remarkable. it's crazy i know i've done so much nice. stuff for you yeah. why don't we see your [ __ ]. presentation. [Laughter]. little [ __ ] okay all right what is it oh. i like this oh the grateful dead. the grateful rudy oh let's see rude. let's hear it hello everyone. hello i'm rudy yeah and i'm gonna be. presenting the grateful dead wonderful. oh sorry no you don't clap. oh my bad so there.
as you can see there are a lot of um. names. but the first the first ever that um the. first people that formed the grateful. dead were jerry garcia. bob wire. and bill krutzman and then the other few. were when those four or no those three. left. and then they replaced them right on and. then.
other the other names of the band are. the other ones. we have to the dead i like it legion of. mary. dead and company and rat dog rat dog. baby no dog baby. and then the fans names are called um. the fans. name is called deadhead deadheads. deadheads yeah and then those are the. genres of the. grateful dead rocks psychedelic rock. blues rock and etc. yes and you're missing one of the. members. who's the newest guitar member who's the.
newest guitar player he's not up there. um john mayer john mayer yeah. he's not up there why is he not up there. i forgot you forgot you saw john mirror. playing for the good dead. yeah i didn't know that you serious yeah. yeah he's. yeah okay do you know he's i won't get. into it. it's like probably one of the best. modern guitars of ours i'm still. presenting can i say this though. genuinely. i know i know you are but can i just say. that let me interject one of the best. guitars. of our time he's great no no one of the. best guitars of ours i want to see.
something even more controversial though. oh boy here we go okay. i think that adam lambert is better than. freddie mercury. next slide that that picture of them was. the first um. show that they did oh cool and then. they began as the warlocks and formed. early. 1965 in palo alto ca. palo alto california in extremely. wealthy area of northern california. where stanford university is. and then the name grateful dead was. chosen from a dictionary.
and it meant the soul of a dead person. or his angel showing gratitude to. someone who arranged their. burial burial but yes don't correct her. well it is burial. in the philippines it's called boreal. burial yeah i went to his funeral and. burial. yeah next slide please fun fact. say no to drugs. okay in 1970 the ban was going to. perform. at the warehouse in new orleans yes.
and at the night of january 31 police. raided their hotel and arrested 19. people with possession of various drugs. no that's disappointing i never thought. that band was into that kind of stuff. that's disgusting. okay during their europe 72. tour pig pens health one of the members. deteriorated to the point where he could. no longer tour with the band. he died on march 8 1973. that is his. picture that is his picture.
he's known for his he is known for his. long beard. thank you thank you what is this picture. can you imagine it was a picture of. somebody else yeah. that that is a friend of his yeah. i'm gonna be telling this slide i'm. gonna be telling you of the. deaths of the members oh my gosh. this is amazing give us the desk baby. on february 1975 keith and donna jean. god just just drive forward.
they were both like a couple no [ __ ]. two random people with the same [ __ ]. up last time i'm just telling you. because you did you might not know. yeah like when keith and donna met. they're like you're a gotcha too. they left the ban but then keith died in. 1980 because of a car accident. oh no that's right um midland the. keyboardist of grateful dead for 11. years died due to narcotics overdose.
in 1998. then shortly jerry garcia the. main. singer. garcia's health started to decline and. then garcia was in a diabetic coma for. several days in july 1986. later died on august 9 1995. wait he was. in a coma for nine years. several days no days a few days wait he. garcia was in a diabetic coma for. several days. in july of 86. okay i thought he stayed.
in a coma for nine years and he played. the whole time. he died in 1995. next side piece. my high school girlfriend's brother had. his hand you know he only had four. fingers on one of his hands yeah. and he had you know his hand print on a. poster in. in his room and it always intimidated me. because. his hand was so big and her brother. hated me go ahead. the grateful dead performed the last. concert on july 9 1995.
at soldier field in chicago and that. year was when. joey garcia died mm-hmm uh joey. joey jerry it doesn't matter jerry. garcia died. whoa all right relax it's the way she. yells. okay and their legacy their grateful. dead form. during the era when bands such as the. beatles the beach boys and the rolling. stones were dominating the airwaves. that's right. they were part of the process of. establishing what psychedelic music was. they were the pioneering godfathers of.
jam band world. and they sold more than 35 million. albums worldwide. that's impressive impressive and you can. buy their merchandise. are we we're plugging their merch on the. show no i'm just saying. okay is that what else that is all thank. you for listening. wait you gotta talk you have to have. some kind of ending cause you just doing. thank you for listening go ahead i mean. she has a big thing. plan go ahead read the thing i mean and. say it what you were gonna say. that is all thank you for listening.
goodbye. that was the big thing. you for listening goodbye bigger thing. than that that's your thing. you were banking on thank you for. listening goodbye that was. it how about this let's let's add one. more piece right now just to end it. i want you to give us kind of a. summation of. what the group is and means to you and. why they're important to music go ahead. yeah and without. looking at them announced go ahead the. group is a rock band. formed in the 1980s.
[Music]. i think and then it's your book report. what. the bad means to me is. their use of drugs because when you see. them perform. they are more enjoyable when they use. drugs. that's correct i've never had. i've never had a more accurate. description in my life. to a t that's perfect yeah just a bunch. of drug addicts.
now you look in the camera right now. yeah and you say thank you. for for listening and about me and. grateful dead of my brokerport and. thanks for being a bad friend you take. us out. thank you for listening to me on my. class discussion. on the grateful dead thank you for being. a bad friend. very good the best. [Music]. hello fred oh my god you know i love. hellofresh. andy no i mean.
don't [ __ ] call me auntie you [ __ ]. why. i hate it it doesn't matter you call me. bob i hate that. okay fine you're right okay one two. three hello fresh. you know what andy yeah bob. [Music].
