Cindy Lou Who Christmas | Ep 301 | Bad Friends
You two are bad friends. >> Who are these two idiots? White dude and an Asian dude. You two are disgusting. Oh, you two are something. >> We're bad friends. Welcome to Bad. Friends. It's wonderful to see you all. >> I'm Jack Skellington. What's this? What's this? There's comics. everywhere. What's this? What's this? Tony Hinchcliffe everywhere. Hello there, Grinch. I'm Jack. Skellington. >> Hello, Skellington. Hello. How are you?
I'm a bony tails. And who the funk is that? LULU? LULU? WHO'S LULU? >> LULU. WHO are you referring to? Me. >> Who's Lulu? Me. Are you Lulu Boo Boo? Ah, you bought me a Lulu Boo Boo for. Christmas. >> All right, THERE'S A LULU BOO BOO, an. expensive one. I'm Jack Skellington. I imagine this Lulu Boo was a little bit. cheaper because it's a Filipino Lulu.
Boo. >> Yeah, a jungle Lulu Boo. A jungle Lulu. Boo? >> Yes. Happy holidays TO ALL. I'M JACK. SKELLINGTON. HELLO. >> HELLO. HELLO. Welcome to the Bad Friends Show. Hey. [Laughter]. Hello. Do you want to play a Christmas. song? I don't Well, we can make one up. Let's make a Christmas song.
What kind of snow is this? >> Cancer? It's crack. By the way, this is. obviously so cancerous. >> Yeah. I mean, we're going to breathe this in. We're all going to have This is. asbestos, live asbestos. Yeah. Sing me a song. You got to turn it on. Christmas time for you. Christmas. time for you.
No. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. You got to be silent with the red nose. and the reindeer. You got to have pumpkin spice and all. the glory. as you did. You know? You get it? You know what I. mean? The human spirit's alive. this Christmas. Right? Duality, duality.
and expectations. What What are you doing, dude? Cowbell? How do you not know how to do a cowbell? There it is. You turn. Christmas time. is forgiving. and receiving. But mostly giving. >> Mostly receiving for me. I know. >> Yeah. And taking. And stealing. And.
looting. So, please Please don't be b-. biased. Right? >> Just try us. Try try us. And don't be m-. pious. >> merry to marry. >> Who marry? Yeah, yeah. And don't be. t- t- trying. >> Right. Yeah. Wow.
>> Wow. >> Really good. >> nice? Will you sing a song? >> Yeah. Play a rhythm so she'll sing. >> Yeah, yeah. [Music]. Ready? Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. [Music]. Be good. Eggnog. Don't be on the naughty list. I love. Christmas.
Yeah. Wow, good. It's a hit. It's a hit. It's a hit. >> It's a hit. >> Yeah, yeah. It's a hit. >> It's a hit. Welcome back to Bad Friends. Merry Merry. Kwanzaa. Christmas. Kwanzaa as well. And. all of them. Yeah, merry all of them. >> Dude, let's merry I mean, what What do. we got the Buddhists? What do they do? Yeah, what do the Buddhists do for. Christmas? Well, you know, they're. eating rice for sure. And they're lighting candles. >> Christmas rice?
>> Yeah, yeah. They're also doing a. like. >> you what I love about Christmas. It's a white Christmas. I'm the racist Grinch. I'm racist as well. I'm Jack and I'm a racist. Look at my white face. but my black body. Which means Best of all the worlds. I'm. half. Merry Christmas. I can't do the mask.
It's too hot. >> I can't breathe. It's far too hot. So, um, what did you do for Thanksgiving? What did you do? I went to the Bay's. house. Oh, you did go to Michael [ __ ] Bay's. house. >> Yeah. You texted me. I did. Okay, so. >> That's insane. Yeah, it's pretty crazy. I don't know if. it was insane. It's crazy you went to. Michael Bay's house for Thanksgiving. Yeah, yeah. But it would it. >> Hollywood. Well, I'll tell you what I didn't do. What didn't you do?
Hey, you know, you know, I didn't laugh. >> of you like that? We didn't take any. photos, no. I. I went there because the Remember the. previous year I said I bailed. I bailed. >> That's right. Out of fear. And then they. then they we FaceTime Jewels. From. Michael Bay's house? >> Yeah, cuz they wanted to talk to Jewels. Yeah, but I was out. >> She was out. You didn't pick up. Yeah, yeah. And then, um, it was a little awkward because it's a I. didn't I thought it was going to be like. a lots of people, but it was like pretty intimate. It was.
just you guys? It was me, Michael, um, his fiance, um, and then, um, his mom. Michael Bay's. mom? >> Yeah, and she was super sweet. >> an explosion at dinner? [Laughter]. Did anything. >> But then I saw Bumblebee. Did you borrow. his shirt? What? Did you borrow his. shirt? >> What shirt? Bumblebee's. >> Oh, cuz it's yellow? Oh, looks. >> Really good one. >> Looks like a Bumblebee shirt. >> Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what he had. though there? He You know, he has like a. little museum down there in in his, you. know, bottom floor. And he had the You.
ever see The Rock? The movie The Rock? >> Yeah. One of my favorites. >> it, right? >> Yeah. >> He has that cylinder with the little. balls in it. >> No way. >> Yeah. And I I I held it. Did you want to. steal something? >> Yeah, there was like all those like. little knickknacks. Wow. >> Like a full-blown Teenage Yeah, that. Wow. >> He has that in his house. >> Wow. >> the original. And then he also has, um, like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. costumes. and all this stuff. >> Did you put one on? No, no, no. I would. What What Ninja.
Turtle would you be? Um, Michelangelo. Definitely. Yeah. I'm. Raphael. >> Yeah, I know you You're definitely. Raphael. Yeah. And you guys thought I was going to be. the rat, huh? What's his name? Splinter. >> Splinter. I'm not Splinter. That's. Splinter. I want to be the orange one. There's an orange. >> That's Leonardo. No, that's. Michelangelo. >> I'm Michelangelo. >> Cowabunga, dude. Yeah, did that. Cowabunga, dude. And I'm Raphael. I'm. tortured. >> Yeah. What are you? Donatello, for sure. >> Donatello, yeah. Donatello has a sigh, right? He's purple.
Yeah, Donatello. That's 100%. >> There's a Raphael, right? You're I'm. Raphael. >> Oh, you're Raphael. >> I have the sighs. That's her. That's. Donatello. >> That's Donatello. What else is there? And then he goes, um, after dinner. I mean, it was a great. dinner, too. But it was like awkward because there's. a couple of guys there I think they're. arms dealers. I don't know. They're just. strange guys in like turtlenecks and. like, you know, they're p-. I don't know if they're Persian. I don't. know what they are. And they don't talk.
much. Yeah. yeah. So, I don't know who. they were. And then afterwards he goes, um, "Let's watch a movie.". Don't tell me he put on one of his own. movies. >> No, no, no. That would have been so fun. >> No, we watched Running Man. Great movie. In his theater. Yes, you sent me a. picture of his theater. >> of the theater, yeah, yeah, yeah. >> It's huge. >> Huge. How cool. >> He's a full-blown movie theater down. there. Wow. And then they wanted us to. come on Saturday to watch a movie, but. you were not available. You went back? No, but they want they want to watch a. movie with Jewels. Mm. Mm. And they invited you. I I I have.
the invite, but you were out of town. You have my invite? What do they go. >> Why don't I have my invite? >> What do they go Is Andrew in I thought. you were in Chicago. No, I was here the whole time. Really? You could have gone? No, I was. in Chicago. >> Yeah, yeah. You would have never gone. I. would have gone with you to Michael. Bay's house? >> Yeah, yeah. For sure. You would have? >> Fought her for the pod. Yeah, fought her. for the pod. I would have gone. I mean, Michael was very nice when I met him. Yeah, he's Yeah. I mean, you know, was. it strange at some point? Like when you. wanted to leave, were you like. >> to leave as soon as I got in the house.
Because it's not my I'm I realized that. I'm I'm just not a social person. >> You're not. Yeah, I'm not like I don't. do these things. >> No. I'm not good at it. Well, you're. Well, there was food. So, I eat the. food. And then you're [ __ ]. >> I'm out. >> Yeah. Yeah, but then I wandered around. And then the you know, in his backyard. there's deer. What? Yeah, but if you like if you go to like. Bill Maher's house. You've been to Bill. Maher's house? >> Yeah. Wow. And it's, you know, what.
these guys do is they'll buy like six. houses. Mhm. And they'll just you. connect them all and it's a compound. >> Oh, yeah. It's like one of those feel. It's like vast. >> That's cool. >> One day you and I will have a compound. >> I don't think so. Together, maybe. What I'm say- No, not. individually, but like, you know what I. mean? I'll get this house. There's like. three or four buildings. You get the far. house. Whatever house you want. You know. what I mean? And then in the buildings. maybe th- this one will live there or. maybe the kids here. Yeah, yeah. >> No, thank. >> you. We want a house. And there's a to. be There's a golf cart. Oh, a golf cart.
from house to house? >> to house. >> I love this. This is like the secret lives of Mormon. wives. >> you think? Mhm. Yeah. Yeah. You do? It's. so good. I heard about it for the first. time last night. >> What? >> The secret lives of Mormon wives. This. is what it's like. They all Don't they. all live like right near each other? Yeah, they're all in Provo, Utah. Yeah. >> The area. >> Well, tell me about the secret lives. I. don't know what's the secret What's. their biggest secret? Because they're Mormon, their secrets. aren't a big deal to us. Like they just. kissed each other's husbands. >> Like one time I drank Coke. It's exactly.
right. >> Yeah, yeah. >> like, Yeah. I celebrated my birthday. Miranda! I did. You [ __ ]. >> I know. They do coffee enemas. They do. coffee enemas? >> What is that? It's they put coffee in. your ass. The people are addicted to. that [ __ ]. Well, I mean, I love coffee. I. I do imagine it would be good in my ass. No, I What what A strange addiction. There's a show that And there's a. There's a couple that do it every hour, and it's getting out of hand. You think so? What?
>> It's getting out of hand? Yeah. >> They shove coffee in their ass. >> months, you're like, all right, I'll let. it slide, but every hour for like 6. months, it's out of hand. >> So, because they don't drink coffee, they can put it in their ass. Is that. the loophole? That's like Catholics with. anal. Well, what's the point? Cuz then. you don't drink it, and God's not mad at. you, but you put it in your butt, and. it's fine. >> Yeah. Do you get high? No, you get like the same pick up. You. must get a buzz. >> Yeah. Starbucks. It's like a Starbucks. butt high. >> Starbucks. Yeah, yeah. Welcome to Starbucks. Bend over.
Oh, you I've done wheatgrass enemas. What? You put wheatgrass in your ass? >> Dude, you don't know that story? Wheatgrass ass. >> When I was doing When I was detoxing off. of um Vicodin. and all the all the all my opiates, and. then I and then Abby brought me to that. wheatgrass farm. I remember. Yeah, for. like a month. >> Yeah. And then I woke up one day. I was. like going through detox. And I. I woke up in the bathroom with a [ __ ]. green juice all over the bathtub.
bathroom, the floor, with a tube in my. ass, and I was shaking. I was trying to. do my own wheatgrass enema. You're doing your own? Yeah, but they. but they they have the You know what I. mean? The apparatus and all the stuff, and they teach you how to do it. But so, this is a normal thing to put wheatgrass. up there, or this was your solution? Maybe I improvised. I think it's your. Yeah. >> I think I found a garden hose. Right. That just sounds like a bit. Someone's like, you know what I did? I. made Bobby Lee put wheatgrass in his. ass. But look up wheatgrass enemas.
Yeah, it's a thing. That's I've never. heard that in my entire life. >> Yeah. Wheatgrass enema. Yeah, it's it's. >> Thumbs up. Yeah, it's it's a whole. thing. >> benefits? It's good benefits to it. I'll. tell you what. Probably just as. beneficial to drink it than to put it up. your butt. Yeah, but I think it helps with colon. cancer, maybe. Oh. >> Helps loosen stool, obviously. >> Yeah, lets the stool green. It dyes it green. It dyes it green. That's all it does. It's like the river. on St. Patty's Day in Chicago. Yeah, yeah. This is not a new issue. Thousands of. years ago, people were taught how to. purify the body with a live raw vegan.
diet and enemas. So, people have been. doing this for a long time. Yeah. The. ancient. Essene sect of Judaism understood that. fasting and colon cleansing help clear. negativity and toxins out of the. physical body, so the mind could be. quieted and the spirit renewed. >> Yeah, dude. We should do it on the show. I guess if the Jews have been doing it. for thousands of years, huh? >> Bert Kreischer one. You gave him an enema? A a coffee one, I. believe. You gave me a Tic Tac one. Yeah, I did. I put I put a Tic Tac in. his butt hole. >> And some say that's still up there. Yeah. Yeah, we had to cut that.
Yeah, we did have to cut you doing that. You putting a Tic Tac in his ass, we. couldn't air that. Oh, yeah, yeah. I. mean, it's funny. >> It's funny, yeah. Was it an orange or a. white one? I think it was white. >> Yeah, good, cuz the white one the orange. ones I chew too fast. And the orange ones you you you chew? It's candy. Yeah. There Nobody [ __ ]. sucks on an orange Tic Tac. You just eat. the whole thing. You chew the whole You. just the whole. Yeah, in your mouth. >> Dude, I got into a car back from the. airport, and the guy You know how. sometimes they have like mints and water. and stuff? This guy had Hi-Chew. I love. Hi-Chew. >> I love I suck on Hi-Chews. >> I told him I go, I'm going to eat this.
whole thing. >> You chew on them or suck on them? Both. I I How long do you suck for? I'm a pretty good sucker, dude. I suck. hard. >> You suck way hard. Yeah, too hard, almost. Hi-Chew so good. >> Hi-Chew's the best, dude. >> So, I told him I said, I'm going to eat. all these Hi-Chews. He's like, that's. all right. That's what they're there. for. Eat the Hi-Chew. I love He was such a nice guy. And you. know what the. Asian candies are doing now? What? >> They start putting like other things in. it, like a little. You know how you suck on a Asian candy, and then there's like a little mochi or.
something in your mouth, like a random. bit. >> Yeah. That they stick in there. It's I. like It's a little delight. >> It's a little treat. It's a little. surprise. >> like thank you. Like like little things. like that. >> Mochi rice mochi fruit cake. daifuku dessert. Yeah, the Asians really And they. Do you go to you get Asian chips? Like. it'll be Lay's, but they'll have. different flavors. >> Oh, I like the foreign flavors. Yeah, do. like yeah. Does the Asian one I had, I. think I had dachshund. Was a Chinese chip. Dachshund? Yeah, dachshund or Weimaraner. I don't.
remember which one it was. Yeah. I had dog. It was. like dead on. That was my joke. Oh, that. was it? >> Didn't land at all in this whole room. >> Uh-oh, dachshund's a dog? Dachshund is a. dog. >> Oh, [ __ ] I missed She got it. Did you. get it? I smiled. It went right over. everyone's head. It No, it went over my. head. I didn't know what a dachshund. was. Or or I said it. >> Can we rewind that? It's It makes me. look like a fool. >> What kind of chips did you have? Chinese. chips? Yeah, what what did What did you. have?
Saint Bernard. Real That I've had that before. >> had Saint Bernard lately? >> Yeah, yeah. They're so good. >> They're so good. >> But you really like pug chips. The pugs. are good, but you know what? Right now, cuz I'm on um Wegovy and stuff, right? I. get the Chihuahua. It's smaller. It's a. smaller chip. It's a tiny chip. Yeah, yeah. But. >> yourself some Chinese chips? But give. give me the exotic flavors of the. Japanese like chips. They do have really wild flavors. >> Yeah. You know what I kind of like is. ketchup. You ever had ketchup in Canada?
>> Yeah. >> Those are good. >> Those are good. >> They have them at Trader Joe's now. They. do? Yeah, I just discovered it. Give me. some unusual chips there, guy. >> banana ketchup? What? Banana ketchup, Filipino ketchup. >> Banana ketchup? No, dude. That's not a real It's the. wrong fruit, dude. It's so good. >> Banana and ketchup? >> Yeah. Is there tomato in it, or is it. made out of the bananas? There's maybe a little tomato, but it's. sweet. That's it? It's so good. >> Is that banana ketchup?
>> Yeah. Is that the kind you have? Yeah. I want an order of French fries with. banana ketchup. I mean, so jungly to. have banana ketchup. Sponsored by Dana. White, UFC. [Laughter]. UFC COME UP WITH A DIFFERENT EAT THE. TIME! [Laughter]. CHOCOLATE EGGS! LOVES UFC! BANANA KETCHUP. BANANA SAUCE. UFC,
that's insane. Thomas Achang. What is. that What's the. It's an abbreviation, but what does it. What does it stand for? >> I don't know. United Flavored Ketchup. Is that what it is? >> No, I'm just. No idea. >> UFC stands for Universal Food. Corporation. So boring. But I I believe. that the Japanese look at our flavors. and they go, "Ooh, I can't believe they. do You know what I mean?" Barbecue. Yeah. Salt and vinegar. All right? >> Yeah. Or chive. We never thought of.
chive. Yeah. Do you think or not? >> Yeah, they must. Honey butter. >> That one's so good. >> Kalbi. Yeah, honey butter's Well, honey. butter sounds good. Yeah. I like honey. and butter. What is one? Zoom it in. Just chips. Oh. Just chips. Lot of words for just chips. What. What does that mean? Okay. Doritos. What flavor? Wasabi. Doritos. I bet you that's so good. >> So good. Wasabi Doritos. Mike Popcorn. That's a. guy named Mike. They made popcorn out of. him. And the other one looks like wagyu.
beef. Yeah. >> Yeah. And you know where you get them here is. like [ __ ] like vape shops. I've seen. them. I've seen. >> You're right. You go to a vape shop, it's like, why do they have these here? >> shop you go to I go to, cuz he goes, "Bobby was just in here, man." Yeah. By. the way, last night I went and got. pizza. Yeah. And the guy's like. the guy who works there, sweet guy. He's. like Prince. He Yeah. Yeah, yeah. >> "Are you famous?" I was like, "No, man.". And the guy in the back, he's like, "The. guy in the back says you're famous, man." And then he comes out, he goes, "We should get your picture on the. wall." And I was like, "No, no, that's.
very nice. Thank you." And he goes, "But. it's got to be you and Bobby together.". And I was like, "Okay." He goes, "He was. here like an hour ago." You had just. gone to Prince. >> Yeah. You know what I got there? The. greatest pizza I've ever had. >> got that. The with the short short rib. inside of it. Dude, bro. It's Bro! What? I I. Dude, guy. Guy. >> And let me say something, guy. >> It's so good. >> Not just the best pizza I've ever had, dude, guy, right? It's They're ending it. No, it's only. for a limited run. Yeah, they're going. to end it, guy, right? And I'm telling. you right now, guy, dude, best pizza. I've ever had, guy. Except for.
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Am I close? Yeah. Got I got to be. Michael Bay had. um He also He had two or three kinds of. stuffing. I bet you one of them was like. a gluten-free stuffing. One stuffing. One? Yeah, one stuffing. >> Cranberry sauce. Yes. Did he have green. bean casserole? No. Interesting move cuz the crispy. onions are probably one of my favorite. things on top. But the can I can we go. back to the um stuffing? >> Yeah. It was um homemade? Not just homemade, high-quality breading. Yeah, it's homemade probably. >> Yeah. It and it's I think they used.
different varieties of bread in the. stuffing. Wow. Well, you use sourdough. and then this brioche. You know what I mean? And these. different cuz they were different. texture, cube size, right? The best stuffing I've ever had, right? He also insisted insisted on carving. He. carved. It's his house. Cuz his dad's a. a surgeon. Oh, you should let him My. dad's a surgeon. I could You know what I. mean? He's like one of those guys, you. know what I mean? Well, his dad should. have done it. You can Oh, he's dead?
You can carve from the after? Yeah. I mean, surgeons are the one that. should cut a turkey. >> But it was a great turkey and then they. had nine varieties of different pies and. cakes. It was in incredible. >> Pumpkin. apple. >> Yes. two cherry. Tillamook. Tillamook. >> Tillamook ice cream Tillamook. So, what is this? The cheese company? Tillamook Tillamook, yeah. Yeah. >> That's what I said. Tillamook. >> Tillamook Tillamook vanilla ice cream. with that fancy or Just vanilla?
I don't know, just vanilla. No. Yeah. Come on, Michael Bay. Here's another. thing that I was like, uh-uh, which is. um. one one of the um. servers or you know what I mean? You had. servers? You didn't go serve yourself? No. >> There were staff there. There were staff. there. And they were like. Yeah. And they were like, um staff Would you. like a flat or sparkling water? And I go, I'll have a diet Coke. We. don't do soda here. See, this is a And already I was like, I.
don't know, should I leave? What is with. celebrities that. I think I'm going to leave. It's soda. Celebrities do This is like a Hollywood. thing. They're like, we don't we don't. have soda in our home. Have you been to. my house? Look at what's in the fridge. >> It's a soda can. His whole house is a. soda can. How many diet Cokes do we. have? A lot. There's the upstairs fridge. and the downstairs. Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. When you turn on your faucet, diet. Coke comes out. Exactly. Wouldn't that. be sick to do that? That's like. Brewster's Millions. Another thing is also What time did the. sex party start?
There was only Well, what happened was. there was only his fiance there. Mhm. For the whole day and aside from his. mother, so they they were the they were. the only two ladies there. But then later another group came. Women. prospects for you? But they were No, they were all. hit up with like. guys I don't I don't know much about. They all had Hello, I'm Abdul. Oh, Abdul? Yeah, yeah. I go, what do you do? Okay. Okay. And and you're like, okay.
So, in my mind I'm like, oh there's. there's it's I don't know. There was no. single ladies there? No. Nothing? Yeah, and then. um yeah. And then in the in the movie theater. there's like the back row is like a. gigantic kind of couchy kind of. situation. >> Rut row What? Rut row So, it was it was. Michael and his fiance just laying there. with the pillows and stuff. >> Sexy. And I'm just sitting there in the. chair. by myself. There was no popcorn. I just. sat there. No popcorn? No, no popcorn. This guy's got nine times Oh, you know. what? Jeff Beacher was there. Beacher's Yeah, they're good friends. I. see them at the store all the time.
They're there all the time. What if they're in like an open. relationship? Mhm. Who? And that's why. you got invited over. Wow. They were. looking at. I would say no. Really? Yeah, because I know something about. Michael that I just don't think I would. feel comfortable. Mhm. Mhm. He's got the biggest dick in. Hollywood. And you're not down for that? I heard Cameron too has a big one. It is It is true. I bet you directors. penis.
Yeah, the bigger the movie, the bigger. the Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's why directors don't need to be on. camera, but they must have nice pipes. I. think Wes Anderson has a thin one. His dick's like Yeah. Um maybe maybe. this, maybe that. >> Yeah. Yeah. Wes Anderson's penis go like this. I'm going to come. Yeah. I'm pretty sure. I'm going to come. Yeah, let's move that my sack over here. cuz you know what I mean? Visually. visually, you know what I mean? It's got. to be, you know what I mean? What does. that say? Michael Bay has a big [ __ ]. but I like to believe mine is bigger.
He's up If he's up for it, we can both. reveal ourselves. on the Spartacus steps at Universal and. put the question to rest. Who is this in. Who said that? >> It's McG. Oh, McG's penis. >> But I want to also say about Michael. Bay's penis what I heard, it's also. perfect. Mhm. There's no twist and. turns. It's straight shooter. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not It's not like. >> You're a lefty, right? Or a righty? Mine. leans all the way to the left. Um my left. I'm a righty. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know why, but I I'm trying. to like center. Trying to get it back. Yeah, so I'm I'm trying to go more to.
the right so it goes back. Yeah, you got. to pull it. Right? But it it's been been. bent so far to the left that it kind of. hurts. It's almost like it's looking away from. you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Doesn't want what. you're trying to do. >> But he's just like, you know what I. mean? Yeah. Leave me alone. >> Yeah, no, you know what I mean? But I. try. But then sometimes I just go back to the. left, you know what I mean? But it's. like I don't know why I did that. I. imagine your penis in therapy. Yeah. Like your penis is in therapy smoking a. cigarette. Yeah. And the therapist is. like, what what is the problem? He's. like. I don't know. After 54 years I thought.
he would just leave me alone, but. he just can't seem to stop yanking on my. neck. You know what Pauly Shore's looks. like? No, no. It looks just like that. It's scary. Anyway. What did you do for. Thanksgiving? We just celebrated at at the Collice's. place. What did you eat? The night. before. Yeah, the night before. But not. the night of. What did you do the night. of? Nothing. What do you mean? You guys.
don't do Thanksgiving on Thanks I. FaceTimed you and why didn't you pick. up? Cuz I was at my friend's. Doing what? Nothing. What were you just sitting on a couch. and just stare at the wall? What like. what do you mean nothing? >> a movie. What movie did you watch? [Laughter]. Show Stranger Things. Oh, yeah, the new. season came out. new season came out. What what And and 11 is 46 now. How old are those kids? Yeah, they're. old now. I mean, it doesn't even make. sense. They're younger. She's 21 years old and. they're still pretending to be like high.
school or teenagers. Yeah. Or younger. than teen. Yeah, they're all early. teens. Aren't they supposed to be in. middle school or in high school now? High school. High school. Yeah. Yeah. Good show? Yeah. Yeah. How how many have. you seen? I watched the first season. I. I think I did too. >> I got what I needed out of the first. season. >> The first season I saw. Should have been. a movie. It was a great movie. Um But. outside of that I'm like, what else are. you going to do? Are you watching. anything? Right now? Yeah. Uh let's see. I watched. >> Plurbus? I didn't see Plurbus. I'm I'm caught up. It's so good. It's good? It's so weird.
You like it? >> Yeah, it's great. >> Weird good. It's weird, yeah. We watched. throwback movies over over the holidays. My sister loves retro movies when we go. home. So, we'll sit for hours and hours. We ran through all of the. Austin Powers series. Of course. One of. probably one of genuinely some of the. greatest front to back comedies. I mean, two is by far the best. I want. to take over the world. It's so good. It's layered with jokes. >> Yeah. Like layered layered layered with. jokes.
By the way, did you see what Beyoncé. wore to F1? You know, I was in Vegas. >> so hot Did you see that? Did you see. that? I was in Vegas for the I didn't. stay for F1, but I went for the week of. Look what she wore. This is it. Jesus. Christ, she's a runner, she's a track. star. Wow. And Jay Jay-Z. just wore all black. Mhm. And she wore. an unbelievable outfit. I think it has a. cape on it. Yeah. Fly away with me. She's so perfect. >> She is [ __ ] perfect, huh? They. probably smell so pure. She I bet you.
she smells like You ever been to Do you. know Do you know what I mean? Do you. know what I mean? >> Oh, yeah. Like if you see a Rihanna and. you just go. I smell their photos. And I imagine. They should do scratch. and sniff trading cards so you know what. they smell like. Yeah. You ever been to. Iceland? No. No? No. Have you ever been to a. place with that's remote that has like. fresh water flowing? That's what she. smells like. Fresh water flowing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Now, Jay-Z, how does he smell? Unbelievable. See, I just think he's got.
his own scent now. Like he probably You. know you get so They get people that get. so famous and rich. They have like made. up colognes that you're like, "I don't. even know if that smells good or just. weird." Yeah. Well, I'm like that. No, you smell You smell good. You smell very. good. >> Yeah, but how much cologne I mean I I I. try to buy the weirdest colognes I can. get. And I try to mix and match. >> frog wart on tonight, don't you? Frog. warts? No. [Laughter]. No. No, the mood killer. I'm sorry I sorry I.
I I didn't know you were I I thought you. were being serious. I thought there was an actual cologne. called frog warts. >> There is. Yeah. You own it. Yeah, because there there are. smells that I'm buying that are like I. know, you told me some of the peculiar. things that you've got. Like Vietnamese. coffee and stuff. Ooh, that one I'll. take. >> Yeah. But I'll take the other coffee, Turkish coffee. Yeah. I love Let's come. up with it if they don't have it. >> do the thing? What? You and I could do a. scent a scent line. Yes. Be rad. Cuz we always smell pretty good. Yeah. Let's do um Does she Do you wear.
perfume? Not really. Do you wear deodorant? Sometimes. When when? Like what day do you choose to wear. deodorant? When it's like really hot. But most of the time I just don't wear. any. Yeah, it's probably better for you. to not. >> has an essence. What's your. >> Think about this, okay? Even if like I don't want to be. controversial, but even like an IED. a bomb. Mhm. Right? If you smelled an. IED bomb, right? There's probably, you. know what I mean, flavor. >> It's got an essence. No. Yeah. No, just listen.
Just listen. Don't Don't. cool it right back to the essence, right? >> No, dude. Bombs have an essence. Crazy. I know WHAT I'M SAYING. NO, NOT WHEN THEY'RE OFF. THAT'S A. COMMERCIAL. Smell like you've just been bamboozled. Not when they're off. When Not when they. go off. I mean before when you're making. it. Yeah, the smell of like. >> of like Let's just come up with a. different one. Like um Oh, no, that. one's good. Like I'll tell Smell like a suicide.
bomber. That commercial would be awesome. That's. not what I meant. Such a good. commercial. Yeah, yeah. So I You want to smell like death? Death. By Calvin Klein. Okay, yeah. That probably has. an essence. It's got an essence. No, it's There are notes in it. There are. There are flavor notes in it, right? Right. Right, that you can't smell. anywhere else. So, um. you know the t-shirts I get? Yeah, from.
Madewell. Madewell. Yeah, yeah. So, I. went to their factory once, right? >> Downtown? No, it wasn't downtown. It was. They used to have a place on Fairfax, right? >> And I used to go in there and the guy. that, you know what I mean, created. the president of the brand. he goes, um. I I you know I I. created a cologne, but it's like no one. likes it, but I like it. And I go, "What. is it?" It's called smoke. Mhm. And I wanted to see like, you know. what I mean, and like a car engine. smoke, like a combination of these kind.
of fuel like smells. And he gave me a bottle and I I used it. all. And it smelled like, you know what I. mean, I had just came out of a coal. mine. But but people would go, you know what I. mean. interesting, you know what I mean? Some. Yeah, sometimes, you know what I mean, interesting. It doesn't have to smell. like good. It just has to smell. interesting. Interesting can be better. than good. >> Yeah, so what I'm saying is is that. >> to smell bad. Yeah, but it doesn't smell. bad. No. >> It smells unique. It smells unique.
>> Like what's your favorite smell on a. guy? Nothing. You don't like You like people. to have their own body scent. Yeah, but. I sucked someone's dick last week and it. smelled like guava. We'll be right back. Holy [ __ ] like guava? It was so good. >> It tasted like guava. Tasted and smelled like guava. I was. shocked. >> What did he put guava lotion on? I don't. know, but it was so good. She obviously blew a koala.
Or some sort of, you know what I mean. a tree animal you know what I mean that. ate a guava. right? And it And she he peed the guava. And it Yeah, yeah, and it was some sort. of like Guava tastes like a mix of. strawberry and pear with tangy sweet. floral flavor and juicy, sometimes. grainy texture. He probably put guava lotion on his. weiner. I don't know, but it was good. Yeah, okay. The best tasting you've ever had? Yeah. Okay. Well, I'll. May I. throw in my bit?
>> Yeah, they have flavored lube. I was. just googling for my own Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, for your There's a girl I'm seeing. that has, you know what I mean, you know. what her. her cha-cha her cha-cha. it tastes like Life. Life cereal? I love. that. >> not not not not not not 2% or 1% milk? No, no. What? 2%? Cinnamon Life. Oh, cinnamon. Life. So good. It It tastes like there's. no like, you know what I mean. weird It's pure water like. Not for me. What do you need? >> I like a little I like a little stinger.
I want it to be like, "Ooh.". Right. I want it to Like whiskey. I want. it to shock you a little bit. >> Have a burning in your Just a Not burn, but more Just like a little like, "Oh, oh, oh. Oh, it's the afternoon." No, yeah. I. want to taste the day. Mhm. Let me taste. the day. Mhm, interesting. Yeah, taste. the day. I like Life. You like Life? Yeah, yeah. Where it's. just like pure. It's It's It's like It's. like how Beyoncé smells. Yeah. Pure. And there's no. be like And she's a white person. Of.
course. >> say pure? Yeah. No, that's not what I. said cuz usually when you date. >> Damn, dude. No, that's not why I That's. not why I said that. That's not what I said. What I'm saying. color do you have in mind when you say. pure? What? Which color do you have in. mind? When I say pure? Uh-huh. It could. be Beyoncé is what I'm saying. But was it? Okay. No, it wasn't. No, it wasn't. What I'm saying Let me. get Can I get my points out, man? Please. Please, please. Okay. Please. What I'm saying is is that, you know, I've been with some white women. Oh,
yeah. And there's. there's been like a funk sometimes. We got the funk Yeah. Yeah. Hey, we got the funk. Like Studio 54. It smells like Studio. 54. Yeah, yeah. The white people We got the funk. We got the funk Yeah, we got the funk. We got the funk Yeah, that I don't like. that. >> George Clinton? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it smells like George Clinton. Little. George Clinton. Yeah. It smells like Parliament. And the.
Funkadelics. And the Funkadelics Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I don't like it. I love it. >> Yeah, yeah. A little bit of funk a. little bit of stank. Do you What? You. only like American cheese? You only like. like cheddar? You don't like any funk. cheese? >> No, I don't like, you know, the the. sweat between Miles Davis's lips. [Laughter]. Yeah, that. I don't want that. Yeah. I don't want the sweat between. the lips, you know what I mean? So, is. this guy that you're hanging out with. now? Are you going to get him a. Christmas gift? I don't know, maybe. You really like.
him, huh? It's serious, huh? Yeah. Yeah. So, you're going to get him a gift. >> What Well, first of all, I thought you. were gay. Everyone thinks I'm gay. >> Yeah, yeah, and I I guess we're you're. not. Yeah. I think why I thought cuz I. went to Joshua Tree and she thought, "Oh, you're going to have a lesbian. gangbang with all your friends." Yeah, yeah. I'm like, "No." Yeah. Okay. How many people went? Like four girls. Jules, um That does sound like a Joshua. Tree. Yeah. They're like, "We're all. piling the Subaru. We're going to.
>> Also didn't do hallucinogenics. >> What did you guys go out there to do? Just They watched Stranger Things. I don't know. It was my birthday. weekend. We just went hiking. Sounds. like a gangbang. No. >> Drinking? Drinking. >> Drunk? No drugs. We ate nothing. No. Do. you don't do drugs ever? I don't really do well with Do any of. your Do your friends do drugs? No. That's good. They're all like her. They're just chill. They're chill. Here's the thing, Jules. Since we raised you, we view I view you.
like you're in high school or, you know. what I mean? So, let's No Stop that. I. know. The talk. What do you mean the. talk? I don't It's It's you're too. young. >> mad when I go out with friends. When you. When when [ __ ] McConaughey goes, "You. know what? I was at an after party at 4:00 in the. morning. You know who I saw there?" I. go, "Who?" "Jules." She's an adult. That's right. She can do whatever she. wants. >> Exactly. How old are you now? 24. Yeah, what the [ __ ] do I mean. >> I know, exactly. And you know why he. gets mad at me?
>> I went to rehab. My first rehab I was. 14. >> Yeah. Yeah, you're right. Yeah, yeah. She's 24 years old. She's a grown-up. She can do whatever [ __ ]. >> worry? You don't [ __ ] worry. I do worry. Do. you have her location? No. You don't. worry enough. Yeah, yeah. You should. have her location if you really cared. Turn on your location. No. Do it. Why? Kick her out of the house if. she doesn't turn on her location. Yeah, turn on your location. Cuz you got to He. wants to know where you are at all. times. He's worried. Does Caila have. your location? Yeah. Yeah. So, then then I'm fine. I don't have to. Okay. Yeah. But you'll ask her if you. need to know. Yeah. Phoenix was awesome.
And. >> to move there. Yeah. Great restaurants. I do. I want to move. to Scottsdale. I do, too. Are you being serious? >> Yeah, I would move there. Let's move the. show. To Scottsdale? I would love it. I. I would love it. I can golf every day. And really? Every day. Yeah, yeah. I'd. be closer to my mom. True. Yeah. We'd be. closer to everything. Yeah. Want to go? It would make me so happy. I. want to make you happy. >> I want to make you happy. No, yeah.
What is this? You're having a moment. IT'S MISSILE TOE. DUDE. ALL RIGHT. HE RIGGED IT. You rigged it. He got. It's bad luck if you don't do it. You. have to. It's Mr. Chuck. It's Mr. Chuck. Can I grab your hat? [Music].
Oh my god. [Music]. [Laughter]. [Music]. I didn't like that one bit. What's this Kill Bill thing? The whole. bloody affair. It was a family movie cuz. we all love Kill Bill and I want to see. one and two. >> And he edited it together? I think. there's some more footage. Extra back. footage. I think that we. >> But it's going to move seamlessly. between two movies though. >> That's the whole goal. Wow.
>> Yeah, I'm excited. >> I'm excited. I I've never seen anything. like that done. It's funny because when. I saw them both, I've seen them both in. the order that they obviously they were. released, but I saw them so far apart. Mhm. I want to see what it feels like. when I'm back-to-back. Which one did you. like. Which one do you prefer? >> Two. You do? >> I think two is a better movie. Wow. >> I think one is great. I just think two. is just a. I don't know why. I think maybe. nerd-wise, I think cinematically two is. more rad. Yeah.
It looks Some of the fight scenes in one. is so good though. They are good. Like. the bar the go-go bar What Is it right? >> That's right. That's an incredible. >> think two is I don't know why I like it. so much. >> The fight scene between. um. Uma and um. I didn't move with her. What's her name? >> Vernita Vivica Fox. Yeah, Vivica Fox. >> So annoying we couldn't think of her. name. She's so famous. Yeah. And that. that house scene with Vivica Fox that. fight is That's in the first one, right? Fighting her while she's trying to like. temper her child. >> Yeah, that's right. sitting and having. coffee after Well, they fight first and.
then they see the bus drop her off. Yeah. Well, they they start fighting. Yeah, yeah. >> And then they stop and then they have. coffee together, which is [ __ ]. awesome. >> Yeah. Yeah, it's a great movie. I just think two I don't know. What's. your vote? Two. Two. One. One. Both. ones, yeah. I think one too, yeah. Have. you seen them? Mhm. Yeah. >> rewatch them. I mean, they're both. great. I don't know why. I mean, you. know, they're both awesome. >> wait. Yeah. Exciting, dude. >> It looks pretty exciting. By the way, we. went to the movie with with my family. over Thanksgiving. It's It's my favorite.
thing in the world. You know, jokingly, my sister was like. Well, let's go see the um. the magician movie you're in. And I was. like, I don't I don't really want to I. don't want to go to the theater with you. guys and see that. I don't I don't want. to. And then. my dad from the front of the house, he. goes. I I want I got a movie. Yeah, yeah. >> like, what What do you want to see? He's. like, Nuremberg. I was like, we're not. going to go see. the Nazi trials. It's.
In Chicago, it's dark at 3:30, gray all day. I don't want to go see the. Nazi trials. He goes, it's [ __ ]. history. I go, I know. He goes, IT'S. IMPORTANT. I WAS LIKE, I KNOW WHAT HAPPENED. >> THAT'S INCREDIBLE. >> And he was like, what do you want to. see? Then we all decided to go see Rental. Family. And. I'm not kidding. Masterpiece. >> I cried. five times. Oh, yeah. Masterpiece? Five. times. I cried five times. >> Best movies I've seen. Did you see I put. it up on Instagram? I said, this is one.
of the best movies I think I've seen in. [ __ ] years. I got to see it. >> It's so [ __ ] good. >> It looks good. And I'm going to say. something that sounds out of pocket. >> Yeah. Japanese people are the best. THEY'RE. >> NO, THEY'RE NOT. >> YES, THEY ARE. >> THEY'RE NOT. DUDE, THEY'RE NOT THE BEST. >> THEY ARE. >> THEY OCCUPIED CHINA, KOREA. THEY'RE. THEY'RE OPPRESSORS. >> KINGS. What about Filipinos? Boom. YEAH, RIGHT. DID THEY GO TO PHILIPPINES? >> YEAH. WHAT do they do to your people? >> They murdered. They killed everyone.
>> EVERYONE. >> JAPAN. YEAH, YOU KNOW. IT'S SO GOOD. >> you're seeing them in their Oh, we are. sorry. No, they're not sorry. Yeah, we. do bad things. We are sorry. Yeah, no. We never forget, right? And. never forget. >> The reason that it's so good and I'm. going to This is Don't take this the. wrong way, world. The movie is so strong story-wise, structure-wise. Brendan's a great actor, but he doesn't. like. he doesn't need to be. Do you know what.
I'm saying? The movie is fantastic, so it's not like. he doesn't need to overact. He doesn't. need to like And does he? No, no. I'm saying his emoting is good. It's just a lot of times in this kind of. film, it's so emotion-driven, you like you see the actors like overact. the thing. He doesn't need to. He kind of stays. level and your heart I cried like a. [ __ ] [ __ ] multiple times. >> does deliver. He slid It's a home run. Oscar. Unfortunately, no, because the. it's not getting enough attention.
Don't you agree? I don't think anyone's. >> on my Tik Tok, it's every other comment. >> I know, but that's that's. internet-driven. It's not going to be. the same as the business The business is. going to want something You know, like. Why don't you do the Predator Badlands? I don't want to. Yeah, it's like everything that I ever. say to watch, you haven't seen. >> That's not true. I've seen everything. that you you want me to see. My. Right? No. Nothing. Nothing. That's. right. Yeah. Yeah, nothing. >> Stand my ground. >> And it's because you don't trust my.
That's not true. I trust your taste wholeheartedly. You. have phenomenal taste. Then why won't. Because I just wanted to see what I want. to see. I'm a very like I want to see. this right This is what I want to see. And my dad was mad for an entire week. that we didn't go see He cried. >> Nuremberg. And walked out being like, you should have [ __ ] saw Nuremberg. Like he was But did he like Rental? Loved. He loved it. The whole family. It's a family movie. >> It's so [ __ ] good. And honestly, dude, Japanese God damn, they're rad. Would you say the Japanese currently do.
better films than Koreans? Koreans right. now are leading the film industry. >> Thank you. 100%. But that's just a fact. >> Yeah. >> Well, that's not an arguable. That's a I. think that's objective. >> But best movies. come out of Japan. Historically. Yeah. I like Korean. >> directors, yeah. Yeah. But right now, Koreans. I mean, K-pop demon hunters. Korean dramas. Yeah. K-drama. K-drama. >> I was in Now You See Me part three.
Who, me? Yeah, yeah, you. I was in it I think I'm in it for like. 5/10 of a second. I think it's like off. frame. That's not true. >> No, it's longer. It's longer. You didn't see it. No, my parents did. and they told me it was longer at the. beginning. It wasn't just a scene at the. beginning. I love your mom. Yeah. They. made me see Nuremberg. You saw it? Yeah. >> How good How good is it? I got in. trouble for vaping in the theater. by my dad. >> Oh my god. Oh, your dad did? No, I he. got mad at me for vaping. I thought you. said the staff got you in trouble. He's.
like, what is this Nazi Germany? I can't. vape in the theater? What kind of Oh, so you still spend. wholesome time with your family? He just. went back. Yeah, I went to That's so. nice. It was fun. Tell him about Texas. Who did you see? I saw Tony. He He and. Tony hung out. I saw Tony. >> You were in Austin? Yeah, I saw him. When was the last time you guys hung. out? Last time I saw Tony was Benji's. wedding, like 2021. Yeah. It's a while, but I saw What did you guys do? I just went to Mitsis a couple times. Oh, that's nice. I hung out with people. there. It's fun though, right? Old. friends. >> were you doing in Mitsis?
Just hanging out, smoking weed. It's a. late-night bar. I got it You know why I really went? It's cuz Redband hit me up and said. there was a girl there that wanted to. talk to me. And? I went and talked to her. And? She drove. me home. And? We made out. And? >> And? Guava? Guava dick or no? Guava. No guava. How. did her dick taste? No There's no guava, no nothing. Yeah. No hookup? No, no. hookup. Good boy. Yeah. And also cuz my mom was inside. I was. like, oh, you can't come in. It's loud. My dog will be a whole thing.
Why couldn't you go to her place? Cuz she's staying with her brother in. Austin. Oh, okay. >> Yeah. So, yeah. Let him join. White? White? Uh no, actually not white. >> Good. I think maybe kind of Indian. Ooh. What's this? Ooh ooh. ooh. Bad Friends Mis-Jeopardy. The categories are movies, music, history, and random. Bad Friends Mis-.
>> Bad Friends Mis-Jeopardy. >> All right, let's see it. Here we go. You. ready to play? I I don't know how the game Jeopardy. plays. >> You just have to ask things in the form. of a question. >> Okay, in the form of a question. >> Bobby starts, you can pick any number, but if you get it wrong, you're you go. down. That's fine. I'm going to lose, you know that, right? Okay, I'll have a $100 movies, please. This is the name of Chevy Chase's. character in Christmas Vacation. [ __ ] Do I get to steal? Can you give me. the last name? >> No.
No, that's the hardest part. I pass. Clark W. Griswold. 100 points for Andrew. Negative 100 for Bobby. And Jewels? Negative. Negative 100 for Jewels. Back to the Jeopardy board. All right. Andrew, it's your board. Movies Movies. 200, please. Movies 200. Kevin. McCallister gets left behind in this. classic. Home Alone. What is Home Alone? What is Home Alone? That's it.
I guess. What is Home Alone? Good job. Everybody gets that one. 200. points for everyone. This is not. working. Why? Cuz we got a buzzer. >> individual? Yeah, we'll we'll do buzz an. individual. All right. All right, Rudy, you're up. >> I'll do random. Random for how much? >> Which dollar amount? Go high. Go big. 300. >> Nice. >> Random for 300. Santa Claus's wife is. the most underappreciated person in. Christmas. This is her name. >> I. don't know. I If you want to pass, Bobby. Who is. Mrs. Claus?
Who is Mrs. Claus? That is her name. >> Good job, Bobby. So, we have to fake. buzz in? Yeah. I just tapped. Don't tap. the piano. Why? So, since we cleared. >> Wasn't that hard? Bobby's in first, 300. to nothing to nothing. What do you mean? I have I have I have 200. >> after we No. [ __ ] you. I'm not taking. away my [ __ ] points. He only had and. he Where's my buzzer? I only found one. in the box. Okay. I'll just tap this. then. >> All right. Okay. I'll tap the Santa. >> tied 200 to 200 and then negative 100.
for Jewels. >> Okay. >> Yeah. Is it my turn now? Yep. All right. Um. history for 200. History for 200. Jesus. was born in this little town. I got it. >> Since he guessed. Oh, what? What is the. point of the buzzers then? Oh, yeah. I guess you. >> I chose it. What is it? >> What's the point of the Is it my turn? I. don't know, fancy. Whose turn is it? Bobby. Bobby. >> Yeah. Uh where is Bethlehem? You are correct. Nice. I don't. understand. Yeah. Yeah, good.
No, you're just mad cuz I'm ahead. You're going to get ahead. Get ready. Go. History for 100. History for 100. This was the first song broadcast in. space. I pass. We Are the World. What is We Are the World? We Are the. World is not right. Jewels, do you want. to have a chance to guess or do you want. to pass? What is Where Is the Love? No, it's Jingle Bells. This is. Christmas. [ __ ] [ __ ]. So, Jewels is at negative 200, Andrew's.
at 100, and Bobby's at 300. >> I still run the board? You Thank you. Thank you. run the board. >> All right. Um. >> What am I at? You are at 100. What is he at? He is at 300. OKAY. I DON'T GET I DON'T GET IT. ARE WE NOT. buzzing in? No. I run the board. And. once I get it wrong. >> That's not what Jeopardy is. What the. [ __ ] are we talking about? It doesn't. even make sense. Oh. No, you have to. buzz. >> Jeop That's Jeopardy.
>> Yeah. You buzz in. Jeopardy, you buzz in? Yes. >> Oh, yeah. Okay. Pick the question. >> I didn't know how I don't know how I've. never seen it. [ __ ] you. >> All right. Ready? Yeah. Um music for. 200, please. Music for 200. Santa's. three reindeer whose names start with D. Dasher. Um oh, who is. Dasher, Donner. Who is Dasher? Who is Donner? Who is.
uh. Dirk Diggler. No. Who is Dasher? Who is Donner? I don't. know I don't know the full third. I don't know either. Three, two, it is Dasher, Dancer, and Donner. >> Uh [ __ ] Dancer? I never remember. Dancer. >> I don't remember Dancer. >> so it is still Bobby's board. >> Thank you. Random for 200. Random for. 200. This famous ballet takes place over. Christmas. What is The Nutcracker?
Correct. The Nutcracker. >> Let's go. He's fast. So, Andrew is up to. 100 points now. Cool. All right. >> No, you're up to. 400. Yeah. Here we go. Ready to go. All right. I want to take random for. 400. Random for 400. >> Yeah. The meal Japanese people have for. Christmas dinner. Who got that? What? I Oh, I did not mean to buzz. Oh. I'm. sorry.
I'm sorry. You have to answer. Uh. Um what is duck? Does anyone else want to give a chance. at it? >> What is omakase? Does anyone else want. to give a chance to guess it? No. I. don't know. >> That's wise, Jewels, cuz these guys lost. 400 points. It's KFC. >> Uh that's right. So, I'm down to zero. He's down to He's negative now. >> negative 100. All right. >> negative 100 Oh, if you guess that. >> to negative 200.
>> Yeah, it's Jeopardy. They take your. money away. So, it's it's still pretty close game. still. >> Okay. Go ahead. All right. It's uh whose. board? Uh we'll give it to Jewels. Uh. movies for 300. >> Movies for 300. This man plays a lead in 1946 classic. It's Wonderful. >> I got it. Yep. Who is Jimmy Stewart? Oh, that is. correct. Jimmy Stewart. >> Can you be careful with the piano? That's mine. Okay. I'm sorry. >> Will lift the mic off of the [ __ ] All. right. I apologize.
No. Thanks, man. >> I'm sorry, man. It's Bobby's board once again. Okay. Hold on. >> Yeah, we got it. You're acting really weird right now, dude. You. When you get competitive No, no. There's. There's something goes on in your eyes. You know what I mean? There's stuff. going on. I don't like it. >> There's stuff going on in your eyes. Uh. okay. All right. All right. Movies for what? 400?
>> 400. Here go ahead. The highest grossing. Christmas movie of all time. Bobby. What. is It's a Wonderful Life? That's incorrect. Anyone else want to. try? Home Alone. Uh. Yeah, what is Home Alone? What is The Grinch 2018? Negative 400 for everyone. Wow. So, Jewels is at negative 600. Andrew's at negative 400. is at negative 200.
Nice. Bobby. I'm still running it? >> It's Bobby's board. >> Movie is all done. Okay. Um music for. 300. Interscope Records 1987 Christmas. compilation A Very Special Christmas had. its proceeds donated to this charity. What is AIDS? No. Does anyone else want. to guess? What is AIDS? I've been asking that question since. 1988. Like, what is it? >> I don't know. >> I'm not going to guess.
>> As soon as I heard Wham!'s first song. hit, I didn't know what it was. What is. it? The Special Olympics. A Special. Christmas. All right. Music for 400. Music for 400. For 400. This 1980s. Christmas song is a rare example of a. holiday song that uses the F-slur. Popular 1980s Christmas song. I mean. It's going to be my new favorite, whatever it is. Yeah. It's definitely an AIDS song.
When did Philadelphia come out? >> Yeah, yeah. I don't really know. Yeah. Do you know. any Christmas song? >> I am not going to I don't know. >> You pass on this. You pass. It is. Fairytale of New York by The Pogues. >> Love The Pogues. >> Yeah. Okay. All right. Music 300. Music. 300 is 100 is the only one that's open. >> Then that. What is the highest selling Christmas. song of all. Go ahead, Jewels. Um what is Mariah Carey's. You got to guess. Anyone else want to.
guess? What? What's the highest selling. Christmas song? >> It's one of the highest selling songs of. all time. as well as being the number one. Christmas song. Guys, can I just say the. song or no? Yeah. Go ahead. I can't do it. I don't know. >> I know for sure. Do it. It's only 100. You're not going. to lose much by guessing. Am I still on. top? Technically, yes. >> Yeah, okay. I don't know the song, but can I sing. it? Yeah. Chestnuts roasting on an open. fire.
>> Incorrect. I'm not going to guess. [ __ ] you. It is. Bing Crosby's White Christmas. >> was Bing Crosby. Who sings Chestnuts? >> The best Nat King Cole. >> Okay. All right. How many musics are left? No. more musics left. We have history for. three and four and History for three. History for three. George Washington was busy doing this on. December 25th, 1776. Making. He was crossing the Potomac. I don't know. He was crossing the Delaware.
>> Delaware. I don't know why I said the. Potomac. So, currently, we are sitting. at. Jewels with negative 1,000, Andrew with. negative 700, Bobby in the lead with. negative 100. >> No. >> No, negative 300. 300, yeah. Okay. So, we have history for 400 and random. for 100 left. >> History for four. Let's do it. Saint Nicholas was born in this modern. day country. Go ahead. Germany. What is Germany?
That is incorrect. Does anyone else want. to try to guess? I might as well. Yeah. He's so far. behind. Yeah, it doesn't matter. Uh what. is. Denmark? Ooh, that's good. I don't think so. I don't know. Why. Why'd you say you don't think so? >> I don't know much about Europe, but it's. Turkey. Turkey's different from Holy. [ __ ] Do you think Denmark and Turkey. are the same They're not the same. They're completely different. >> Is Turkey by Istanbul? Istanbul is in. Turkey. >> Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's running the.
game? Yeah. All right. Let's go. One more. >> One more left. This is for everything. You get this, you win. >> You can still do Final Jeopardy. Oh, okay. You can All right. Whatever. Well, we all just took a loss on that. Frosty the Snowman's pipe is made from. this. Corn What is corn cob? No. >> correct. What is corn cob? It's 100. What's that? >> So, he is at Oh, we both just got 400 wrong. again. I know. He's at negative 1,000. Jewels is at negative 1,000. And Bobby.
is. >> He's negative 600. >> negative 6 7 8. Oh. 900. All right. So, >> second. If Jewels hadn't guessed. anything, she would win with zero. That's funny. Final Jeopardy. The topic is Christmas. music for Latin lovers. Woah. God, why. did we make him do this? The question is what is Fancy B's. favorite Christmas song? Feliz Navidad. No, SHE GOT IT.
[Laughter]. JEWELS WON. WHY ARE YOU MAD NOW? WHAT IS Feliz Navidad? >> She didn't [ __ ] know how to play this. nothing. She get. All right, man. It's. [ __ ] [ __ ]. Did you already know the Feliz Navidad? >> No. Yeah. >> No, but it makes sense. Yeah, it's. [ __ ] It's not. >> Yeah. God damn it, dude. >> What do you want for Christmas? Let's. let's say I'm Santa. What do you want. for Christmas this year?
Oh boy. What do you want for Christmas, Jules? Um. hand mittens, like a Hand mittens? Yeah. Like a cute one. You want mittens? Yeah. It's 75° today. Yeah, but it's cute. >> I want two new bits. Anyone can write it for me. for my special. I just need two more. bits. I'll give you two more bits. >> Okay. I got stuff for you. That that's. in my voice. You know, a lot of comics are like, I.
got a bit for sale. You're right, it's. like I wouldn't say that. You would say. something like um Okay, here we go. What. what what do you want for Christmas? You. know what I really want for Christmas? >> What? I want to be. I want to spend just one more. minute of time with. my good buddy, the Big C. He's not around anymore. He's not on the. show. He's back east and I miss him. Oh, the Big C. The Big C. I think you know what? Can I change my. Christmas? Yeah.
I want to. You know what? I want to exchange auras. with him. I love I like And the only way you can. exchange auras with somebody Mhm. is to be with him constantly. And we. should be with him. Yeah. Who's Big C? Okay. >> He He replaced Fancy B. Just for one. episode. Is this my Christmas wish. coming true? >> Yep, it is. Oh my. god. Hold on. Yeah. All right, Feliz Navidad. Okay. I want to SING IT ALONE.
BIG C. BIG BIG C, DO YOU MISS US? YES, a lot. Yeah, we had some good. times, huh? Yeah, we had a lot of time. I'm happy to to see you, Bobby. Yeah. Maybe turn down a little bit with the. Christmas. Don't turn the camera around. I I know, yeah. Andrew Andrew kind of hates me. Who Who do you like looking at better, me or Andrew? Both of you. But if you had to if you had to choose. If I had to choose? Yeah.
It's kind of difficult right now. Why? Because Andrew's holding the phone? I can't Yes. Okay. Yeah. Come on, Andrew. I I like you. But you prefer me, right? Maybe. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Don't feel bad, Andrew. I'm just. I'm just playing. I don't [ __ ] care.
See how he treats you? He can't. Mhm? Nope. What? What? Sometimes. What What did you say? I don't Exactly. I mean, that's what you said, right? That's what you said, right? I said what? What What? I I. WHAT DID YOU SAY? Is this WHO'S ON. FIRST? WHAT THE [ __ ] ARE YOU guys doing? I mean. If that's how you feel No, what I'm. saying is if that's how you feel then. that's what it is.
No, no, no. No, either. I I know, either. I Either way Either way, we're good. Let's Let's change the topic. No, I. don't want to. I want to finish this. Like, why'd you say what you said? What did I say? Can you repeat what I. said? I can't remember. I mean, you're the one. that said it. But I can't remember. Okay, well, let's. just move on then. No. But But I disagree, okay? And that's [ __ ] up. >> Okay. Okay. Okay. Bobby.
Merry Christmas, too. [Laughter]. Merry Christmas, dude. Merry Christmas, dude. >> What did you wish for for Christmas? Well, I already got it for myself. >> Oh, wow. Very cool. >> That's great. You know, it makes me look good look. good. But everyone watching can look even. better if they go TO. BADFRIENDSMERCH.COM. [Laughter]. GOD, I LOVE this guy.
Can I set up a few a few things? Yeah, go ahead. The episode that we did. Yeah, tell What. Have you Are people recognizing you from. the episode? Uh. a few did. Who? Like from work? From like past work places and. blah blah blah. So, I I want I WANTED TO SAY because. to grow, you have to like uh.
Wait a second. I I I have no idea. You do? To grow To. grow as a human Are you a gardener? What's going on here, dude? No, no, no. To grow as a human, you have. to like uh. I CAN'T LIKE I I CAN'T. HEY, BROTHER. Let's Let's go ahead and. write it down for you. >> Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then read it. off to Breathe. Calm down, dude. Calm. down. I mean, I don't know if I should. because you are not going to like it. kind of. What is it? Throw it out there.
Remember when we talked about taking. risks? Take risks. To grow as a human. you need to kind of like. admit your your faults. And reading the comments. of the episode that we did together. I see a few people saying like, oh. I don't like you know, his voice. And I have to say that, you know. My voice is not everyone's uh.
everybody's cup of tea. But to be honest, I never had. voice flavor tea before, so I don't know. how it tastes like. I knew it was going. to be a joke. I knew he I knew I thought. he was going to be sentimental. >> Right, right. >> And I was about to [ __ ] be like, you. know what? >> Yeah. Don't read the comments cuz you're. the [ __ ] and [ __ ] that, Big C. You're. the man. And then he did a joke. I don't. even get it. Can you explain it to me? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. He said uh From the. beginning. Now I know how you feel when. I talk. THERE YOU GO.
YEAH, it's frustrating. He said, I know. my voice isn't everyone's cup of tea. Yeah. But I wouldn't know because I've. never had voice flavored tea. Oh. Before. Before. Oh, before. Sorry. Before is the laugh. That's the [ __ ] kicker I was in. Try. it now because people are, you know, talking about it. And you know, it takes like a whole a. man. you know, to admit your mistakes. That's. something that Andrew doesn't do. So. try to.
you know, be better. Yeah. Next time. Like Andrew needs to be more humble, right? Yes. It's all ego, is it not? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's a cool guy. I'm I'm just. messing with him. Okay. You're never coming back. Bobby, please. Yeah, yeah. Now, since we last saw you, have you. been Have you had some sexual relations. with a woman? This guy.
No. He this guy did you? What? You said this guy? YOU'RE MY FAVORITE. SORRY ABOUT THAT. YEAH. GOD, HE CAN'T EVEN STAND on his. ground. I know, dude. He's like, dude, this guy. This guy. No, Bobby, YOU'RE MY FAVORITE. YEAH. IT WAS A SLIP UP. Thank you. I I forgive you. I love you, bud. Yeah. I I love you, too. Yeah, he's your best friend.
I got I have a gift for you for. Christmas. All right. Yeah. For me? Yeah. It should be What time is it right now? It is It's 6:00. >> 9:00 and Okay. So, 10:00. >> the beach. 10:00. >> the beach. Yeah, 10:00. 10:00 p.m. your time there should be a. gift coming to your door. You don't even know where I live. Good. luck with that. What do you mean? Carlos. Carlos gave me your address. >> Yeah, I have it. We have it. Yeah, we. do. For real? Yeah. We had to book your.
flight. Yeah, needed it. >> You got to go outside, though. Oh, yes. I gave him my info. Yeah, you got to go outside and wait in. front of the house. You'll see a white. van. Go inside it. You got to go inside the white van. What? It's too cold to go outside. >> Trust me, the ice agents will come. inside your house. No, we we we have the heater going full. volume. Oh, well, you'll melt the ice agents. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We come from a tropical country. But the. ice agents didn't want to He didn't want. to go in the house. We'll get him out. there. We'll get him out. Big C, we miss you, buddy. We really do. love having you around. We think next. year you're going to come back on the. show. >> Yeah. I think the fans want you back. >> They want you back. I mean, 50% want me back. Who gives a. >> Who gives a [ __ ]. Wish we love you. >> We love you. I love you. We hope you have a wonderful holiday and. I think you're the best, Big C. And. we're going to get the boys to hopefully.
get you back out here first quarter next. year. Mhm. Um. And and. we love you. And we want you to We want. want to tell the audience have a happy. holidays and thank you for being a bad. friend. Will you do that? Yes. Okay. How's your How should I call the. audience? The people watching. You're call You're. It's on you. It's on you, baby. You do. it. To everyone watching and the 50% that. actually likes me. and a nice holiday and.
and. And the phrase that we say at the end of. every episode. There is a. Thank you for being a bad friend or. Yeah, that's it. That's it. We love you, buddy. Bye, Big C. Say bye. Everyone say bye to Big C. >> Bye. Gift time. Time for gifts. Thank you, McCon. Why do I have a pen?
And I'll open the gifts. Thank you, McCon. Mad Libs. Mad Libs. Happy Kwanzaa Mad Libs. Very. cool. Jokey gifts. Mine is Hanukkah Mad. Libs cuz I'm Jewish. Yeah. Everybody. knows. >> Really funny. We're not going to air. this. It's [ __ ] Holiday spirit. >> No, no. It's [ __ ]. >> very nice. >> Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thank you. It's not. It's not exciting. It's not. You don't. like it? It's for a laugh, right? We're.
never I'm going to leave it here in the. studio. What? I'm going to take it home. No, you're not. Thank you. Thank you for being a bad friend and. Merry Christmas. [Music].
