Christmas Gift: Best of Patreon | Bonus Episode | Bad Friends

hey hi guys welcome back to bad friends. and what did we create for you guys on. patreon we created the best of some. great tidbits and Snips from this year. the best of the tidbits and Snips Snips. and tidbits and also the worst and some. of the worst and they're available on. YouTube and if you like what you see you. can join the patreon to get more of this. and more of bad friends content you. don't it's not it's number one if you. don't join it's fine but but you're just. not cool you're not cool you know but go.

to patreon.com want be cool do it/ badri. patreon.com badri is where you can get. access to all the stuff we did over the. course of the year and what we're doing. next year we have some fun stuff planned. go to. patreon.com okay our next case is uh. Danielle Ortiz versus his brother wants. to take his uh brother to core because. of dog support I like to consider myself. as a primary caretaker of the ass face. dog a blue-nosed pitbull named Tyson and. his brother uh I guess is taking from.

him I was we need we need we need a. better reader we need a better reader we. need someone that speaks English. understand word let me tell you. something I thank you Carlos this okay. it's basically that his brother is. taking back his dog that he took care of. for six years okay I'll tell you what. it's a blue noosed pit blue noos pit get. him in the ring let him start fighting. for. money what do you say honorable what I. say is that you give them to a. Vietnamese family Vietnamese family and. let them let it survive let it survive. if it survives for a year sometimes they. do they do right then you keep it mhm.

next all right we have Arnold kiari. versus his friend in Norway oo noran oh. yeah I was out at a club with a friend. but after the club's closed I went to an. Afterparty with some other friends that. I met at that club but the friend I. originally came with was really mad at. me and still won't return my calls. because you bailed but the thing is he. had work at 9:00 a.m. this case is about. this gentleman ditching his friend I got. to tell you something here here's my.

number one rule if you're be real though. if you're not having fun you're allowed. to leave at any point in the night. exactly there's nothing wrong with that. right you're not his babysitter you're. not his parent right he has his own. choices you made a choice now did you. ask him if you wanted to come with I. mean maybe that's what he was hurt by. but he should have said that and if he. didn't say that guess whose fault it is. who yours whoever the guy's name is. Daniel you should have said you should. have said to your friend you should have. said like hey dud I want to go out with. these cooler guys I gotta go I got.

cooler people to go out with yeah yeah. you want to come if you came up to me. and said hey man I got to go out with. these cooler guys but you're not allowed. to come I would say I bid you a you I. wish you luck but that that' be. ridiculous because you're the coolest. guy I know you're the coolest guy I know. hey honorable honorable you isn't it. honorable doesn't do enough Justice wink. wink to who you really are to me you're. more than honorable yes you are above. honor next hey bad Friends crew um got a. little predicament here uh uh I am a.

white man and um evil evil evil I'm just. curious when it comes to the. Emojis if I change all of mine to a. black guy is that blackf face you got to. let me know please it's actually a. really good question that's such a good. question such a good question I got to. tell you that's a great question because. I do the Black Fist when I text people. back I blackfist all the time I do. eggplant you do well that's. you yeah that's black dick yeah that's.

black dick yeah I I think there's. nothing wrong with using different. colored Emoji they put him in there no I. think it's black face no it's not it is. dude my all mine are. yellow they started all yellow that's. right the regular that's who makes the. phone yeah by the way they were sitting. in the programming room they're like. what color should everyone be and. someone's like yellow yeah like all. right I think that's not blackface I. think you're good I think you should. keep doing it yeah now if you put your. face as a black face and then you follow. it up by using the word that's not good.

that's probably not good but I think. it's good I think you're I love I love. using emojis don't make any sense I do. that all the time like I'll send. somebody like a fire engine truck or. something yeah I like that yeah and. they're like what that's it I like the. telescope I use the telescope sometimes. yeah yeah which what why do people. sometimes do the big eye one no not that. one it's like an oval why like a. suspicious eyes oh I like yeah cuz. they're like what are you talking about. yeah like what's going on is that what. that is yeah I don't like it I like I. like that one because you cannot have.

the huh oh they're doing it to mock you. Bob right big eyes that's them going. look what you can't do my honorable. Grandmaster and Bobby and supreme leader. Andrew are hereby present you the case. of the poorly shower poopy shower bath. train me and my wife have been together. for 10 years we have an amazing time. together recently our love has been put. to the test I'm a man who loves a clean. house and so I have to have a calm mind. I like cleaning and satisfaction to feel. this actually I have a battle with a. shower bath drain in the bathroom it. smells like a bowel of a rotten corpse I. never seem to get the smell to go away.

for more than a few days it always comes. back so when I go to take a bath and. water gets in the drain it's like a. bathing in a toilet filled with poop a. few days ago my wife was showering my. lovely and as a lovely husband I was. bringing some towels but when I opened. the door she was squatting I could see. her [ __ ] in the drain she later told. me that she always has done it and it's. nothing weird I also told her I wanted. her to stop she then went into on and. told me I was trying to control her and. that she was going to continue with her. disgusting activities as is normal am I. ready to tell her to stop I a wait your. humble judgment um another question I. have is why did does explain why okay do.

you have a good divorce attorney because. this is absolutely divorce my wife is. pooping in the shower drain there's a. toilet within a foot away of it I. guarantee it can I defend her you've. pooped in the tub you've pooped in the. tub I've done something equal what and I. still do. it so this is what I it's insane I'm. going to throw up if you're not going to. throw up but it's [ __ ] insane and I. the other day I did cuz I've done it. millions of times but the other day I. was doing like what am am I doing so so.

I was watching what what I do is I go to. the kitchen and I'll watch iPad MH so. I'll watch you know Arsenal videos on. YouTube or whatever right and then I'll. go God I got to got to go to the. bathroom right but instead of going to. the bathroom I just pick up there's all. these cups laying around so I'll just. pick up a cup and I'll just pee there. why because I don't want to go there. it's 6 feet away I don't want to go. there I don't want to go there you piss. in a cup that you drink out of I want. sit I want to do. this in a cup I'm watching videos you.

drink out of the cup I wash them for. that's insane and that's nasty and I I I. [ __ ] I resent the allegation what the. [ __ ] do you mean you piss in a cup that. you drink out of you piss it you clean. it you still drunk you still drank out. of it I know why do I do it yes it's. gross have you guys ever done that no. yes Pete what in the in the car like I. just find a he's in his kitchen I'm in. like but can I say another thing holy. [ __ ] you're in your [ __ ] house you. have six bathrooms so one time I looked.

out my window right of my house I looked. through the like you know have the. little window I look out and I see. theovon. peeing on my like not on the house but. there's a wall just peeing all over the. wall and they go dude there's a bathroom. 5T away he goes I had to go right. now and so and then I understood it I go. I get it it's outside peeing outside is. fine pissing inside on my house it's. going to go it's going to wash doesn't. matter he's peeing on my it's so.

disrespectful why do you think Aussie. Osborne got [ __ ] trouble for peeing. on the. Alamo well that's the Alamo dude my. house is my Alamo dude there's been Wars. well then I'm I'm I my point is this. okay I understand the psychology of like. I'd rather do it now pooping and go in 5. seconds from in a tub pooping in a tub. I'm not saying pissing buddy you're. saying pissing this woman so you're. saying mine's okay it it no it's not. okay it's less gross than this okay this. is [ __ ] in the [ __ ] tub drain you.

know what usually goes down in tub drain. yeah. water poop it's not made for poop I look. can I say something I think you're. wrong Andrew I I'll tell you why what I. I I had diarrhea like here we go you're. going to [ __ ] defend go ahead I love. this like 10 days ago in your bathtub I. love it I I was showering and I just had. to go so bad I there we go I don't want. to be on the show anymore yeah you have. to I I'm disgusted the people that are. on this show dude because you don't know.

what's possible I I I have a great. imagination that's not possible I think. that's what it is you're you're Li. you're limited in your in your. imagination you don't know what's. possible first of all first of all. Carlos and I know what's possible yeah. you're both repulsive no not it's not. repulsive we know the possibility we see. a dra if either of you poop in a drain. of your shower or your or your bathtub. you're [ __ ] repulsive to me okay to. you but to me you're a hero no no no to. 99.9% of Americans you're [ __ ]. repulsive if you poop in the tub Saxon.

Christian fundamentalist [ __ ] that's. right this this is a white person what. I'm saying to you is that you're I like. your imaginations and you know the. possibilities yeah I had to go that's. why you're both single and that lady. right this is why you're both single. that's [ __ ] rude I'm a fat asian guy. that's part of it. but by the way yeah never mind the fact. this isn't just a shower it's where he. [ __ ] it's where they take baths she. does too they poop in the same drain. that they bathe in so when they stop the. drain oh you're insane that's poop.

particles that come back up that they. don't come back up yes they do they go. where they must no it's heavy no no no. poop particles are light how light are. poop particles I think it's coming up. because she's doing it so consistently. so when he she's [ __ ] in there. constantly yeah I bet that thing is. clogged with [ __ ] I know what it is I. know I just realized why she's doing it. they can't afford a. duvet a duvet cover for their bed not. duvet not duvet uh what's it called AET.

they well they let me tell you something. judging right judging by the sound of. this they can't afford to do V either. all right these people sleep on the. floor without a doubt these people sleep. without blankets on the floor no but. think of the theory though all right I I. want to [ __ ] and wash my ass with water. then poop in the toilet and then get in. the [ __ ] then you can get in and open. look after I [ __ ] I get in the shower. and I wash my body including my [ __ ]. but I don't poop in the drain in the. shower dude you probably even eat your. own scabs.

huh you eat your. scabs you you eat all of them see look. at this yeah what is that. breakfast second breakfast [ __ ] what I'm. saying is that I've had I've never eaten. a booger I've never so much as eat. you're not you don't know what the. possibilities are and your mind is shut. and I want you to open you're not. supposed to eat things that your body is. comes out so poop piss boogers was. insane you're not supposed to put it. back it wants it out for a reason anyway.

Carlos you're on my side yeah he's a Bo. no not a booger either let me look at. you Carlos right wait a have have you. eat a scab on your body oh of course. there we go yeah look you're both the. same kind of guy by the way never mind. this is shitfish do you forget this is. shitfish this is shitfish that you're. you're sighing with shitfish I know okay. Pete you ever eaten [ __ ]. scabs no no no God bless Pete that. wasn't weird though what I didn't know. that was I see that's the thing we you. don't know that eating learning today.

the things that are weird welcome to. adulthood thank you and we're just. learning so write down the notes don't. [ __ ] in the drain don't pee in the Cubs. and don't e your scabs write that down. and now we learned something new now you. know it's not going to stop you from. doing it I am this today hence forward I. will not do those things Matt Nolan. versus his wife so my girlfriend of. three years is great but she's so. comfortable with me now and blasts ass. around me all the time love that when. we're eating watching movie and the. worst is getting ready for bed when she. DCH ovens me this [ __ ] is awesome uh if.

you don't know what that is it's when. someone farts we all know what a dutch. oven is I hate when they do that I. invented it bad friends what should I do. I mean there is some evidence against. Matt what's this evidence against Matt. he's got uh eproctophilia this is paraph. this is what paraphilia isn't always a. bad thing that people are into it some. people are sexually aroused by farting. it's called eproctophilia uhhuh whoo and. there's like only fan scrs you can buy. their jars of f okay okay okay no no no. he's right but I also I get a boner to.

cake farts when I used to watch cake. farts I'd get hard watching that girl. fart on a cake you've show me cake farts. before really love it so good and she. she literally goes uhoh it's someone's. birthday yeah it's so funny dude but. it's also um it's a gas inside the body. mhm it's a it's not a poisonous gas it. could be but it's a gas and so it's like. when women don't let it out the insides. must be [ __ ] stinky well we've looked. this up on the show so what I'm saying. is is that it's good that she's. releasing that stuffff so it doesn't.

affect well he's saying he doesn't want. it in front of her I'm on his side don't. do it in front of me I don't fart on my. your wife fart in front of you my wife. has never farted since birth she do it. she burps it. out she does yeah that's where morning. breath comes from she's holding in a. fart all night and a little que too huh. yeah hers are like little. fireworks fronts are fun but if they. smell I mean do your farts.

smell well it's the same poop that poop. comes out of the same pipe so yeah I. think so but sometimes have you noticed. sometimes right it smells like nothing. my farts always smell almost always and. not wretched but they always have a. little a little stank no I've been doing. nothing farts when you get out of the. shower that's the cleanest fart you're. going to get then an hour later you've. got some stank on it yeah but when I eat. eggs oh yeah beans hard hard booil eggs. oh my God most farts are ous and. indicate the digestive system is healthy. farts that have no smell can mean too.

much erors accumulated in the body is. now ready to pass an. exit yeah it'll go juicy Bobby me I just. feel like white people in this. environment is better than an Asian guy. you know what I mean I couldn't agree. with you more yeah Vancouver you know. civilization they go oh we get you know. we know mythological Oklahoma you're. lucky to be here kind of they barely let. me in I had to get you well that was so. weird because none of us had to go. through like I had to do kung fu. Expedition you had to do you had to do. like a kicking exercise at that made. that that meal for the for the TSA with. the the walk what did he say he's like.

make me a a a what's that called a Bim. bin bat bow or yeah no no he go like in. the Asian goes like bana but and you did. though you flipped the shrimp I did I. did and I made the little like the onion. Tower thing yeah yeah yeah like the. little train headed to the dynamite. cave what you always take it too far oh. [ __ ] you Dynamite cave here that's good. next case Jacob rolink versus his. friend's wife oh yeah I like this he. titled cuck issue oh and I don't really.

know if okay I'll tell you this my. friend's wife my friend quote unquote. his wife has recently shown interest in. wanting to swing for context they've. been married for four years and have no. kids but a solid relationship she said. she wants to expand their sexual. pleasure options but my friend isn't. comfortable with the idea of having a. guy pound his wife like the snooze. button on your alarm clock they have had. a threesome before with another female. but now she's throwing it in his face. that it's unfair that there's no guy. ever been involved me me me me he me.

here me I will do it he he will do it. he's suing his friend's wife uh because. he he thinks it's fine not to have a guy. in thre Sims uh what's your perspective. on this well I think that I'm like I'm. in between a guy and a woman you. personally yeah so I could do it you. could go both ways yeah I can do it. because I'm soft like a woman you really. are no muscles no musle to the doctor. they said you have no muscles and no leg. hair really no leg hair no ha on your. back yeah um you know I have a CLP dick. you got [ __ ] dick yeah I have a [ __ ].

dicko beautiful [ __ ] dick right and um. come on [ __ ] I would do an accent too I. like you me like it I like it no do do a. different accent I like it there it is. was that Australian I don't know that. was really good I like it I like it I. like it I like it I like it I like it. all right so look if you're going to. have someone [ __ ] your wife let Bobby. [ __ ] your wife and in fact if any other. people that are watching yeah uh any of. the patre Hors you got to you guys got. to write in if you want your wife [ __ ]. by Bobby please write also it's.

hilarious it is very F I swear to God. you'll get your money back you have to. pay me wa money back yeah you have to. pay me so a it's a deposit and then you. give it back if if you don't laugh like. if you don't have a huge chuckle if you. don't laugh while Bobby's [ __ ] your. wife you get your money back I. guarantee here it guarantee he says and. you can read it too my ex so so I. currently live with my ex-girlfriend who. also happens to be my kid's mom she. cheated on me twice with another of mine. so another woman unless unless he was.

gay before maybe and she's wanting to. get back together she hasn't dated. anyone within a year so NE neither have. I been pretty lame what should I do this. is interesting a very interesting one. first of all um and I'm going to say. something that's probably prehistoric. thinking yeah okay yeah if let me ask. you something I'm if your wife yeah. cheated on you with another girl with. one of my exes no with a girl well but. the one of your ex-girlfriends that's. what it is would you be mad nope be.

stoked that's what I'm saying bring her. down I'd bring her on in I'd be like. come on in yeah yeah yeah what's going. on why is that though because I used to. [ __ ] the other girl OB share you're a. good person yeah I want it in get back. come back come back enjoy the menu yeah. let's have fun together now um if she. cheated on you with her. ex-boyfriend bring him. in exactly it depends is he hot is he. cool I think this guy I think this guy. should get back together with that girl.

it's his ex also and I would say since. you [ __ ] around on me with some of my. exes let's have threesome now so I can. have two for one that makes it fair if. she [ __ ] around on him with one of his. exes assuming it's a girl bring those. girls back in yeah what [ __ ] you owe. him that yeah you owe him at least a. threesome with one of the girls you. cheated on him with in my opinion yeah. right yep what do you think rude I agree. yeah you think let them let them let her. come back but also they' got to she's. got to put on a show mm M yeah so I used. to get boils on my head okay you know.

that no but I don't like it I [ __ ]. hate it my mom used to get it I haven't. had boil in my head in like 15 years. you're boily people yeah but we used to. get these gigantic boils on our head. like it was like a golf ball e what the. [ __ ] it was insane from what I don't. know I never went to the hospital Jes. but I had a remedy yeah right and I I. learned this through zits through zits. yeah basically a boil is a Samoan zit. shut the [ __ ] up yeah a boil is a Samo.

and zit yeah it's the same you know what. I mean um anatomy anatomy okay so what. you do is what I would do is like oh. [ __ ] I have another boil I just wake up. with him okay right it would ruin my day. yeah as as it does right so what I would. do is I would go to the bathtub and I. would get a I would go to 7-Eleven cuz I. had no money back then right and I would. get those gigantic bags of ice MH and. haul it back and people go hey Bob. what's going on boil all right and what.

I would do is I run it with hot water. for 2 minutes like the hottest you could. do yeah and then I would freeze. it you what with an ice cube with an ice. cube the Ice Cube would be here I would. freeze it yeah and then I would do that. routine for a complete hour why' you. need a whole bag of ice because I would. freeze it you didn't have an ice maker. at the house no I didn't have any ice. machine there was no ice maker at the. house like right now do I have ice in my. house you don't why do you not have an. ice maker I don't know how to do broken. it's it's broken you don't know how to. do how to do it you don't do okay that's.

F I want to share something please no. look can I finish this though oh [ __ ]. it's not over can I finish my boil and. you would and what would happen was it. it would pop of course yeah and it would. just drool down your side I know with a. yellowy yeah red it would be yellow. sauce mine's red yeah so go ahead okay I. also had boils in my head in the. Philippines there we go this runs in. your family you guys we're not blood. related because so yeah let's take test. she might be your cousin.

mother but because I had lice it would. go inside the boil but it it's it's a. their Spa I'm getting so gross out it's. unbelievable did you know boil you guys. are [ __ ] boils is a licensed Spa yeah. it's a spot it's a light spot yeah God. they St it out have you been to the back. of her head the front of her head isn't. as nice as the back of her. head come on guys let's. go I just like the voice yeah why do. they have to have that voice all right.

we're going to go to it's underneath her. ears [ __ ] me yeah anyway so what would. happened um it would be so itchy and I. would just feel like the puss and then. every time I scratched it I would see. lies and you have bed bugs at when you. were a kid too no not bed bugs just. roaches but lice you had a lot of lice. lice it lice all the time how many years. did you have lice. for ever since I was young oh and he. still. states in America we don't have them we.

kill yeah they die here thank God yeah. they do but in the Philippines under. Trump they do under Biden he's letting. them roam around around so go ahead but. I had no remedy I would just wait until. it heals oh my that's it oh yeah that's. it I have a fear of skin tagging cuz my. dad has a lot of skin tags I get them. sometimes I have a skin tag back here. yeah and he has little tags underneath. his eyes a lot of like uh where he is. regional Italians like from that part. they get all these bumps under their. eyes yeah you'll get them removed it's a.

whole [ __ ] thing you'll get them. removed lasers by your eyes dude I get. skin tags removed all the time I've. never had one removed yeah yeah go ahead. I also had skin tags you look like. you've had skin tags by the way your. name your nickname to me is skin tag and. and did lice burrow yeah lice burrow you. have a li Li Spa no yeah yeah no so how. many what do you do with them they just. um she cuts them off you know that no. laser you laser yeah you can laser that. [ __ ] off now yeah yeah hey dude.

[Music]. man the number one magician in Dubai. that's right yeah I'm based in Dubai. that was actually my sister very sweetly. said I'm the number one but what of. magic you like should we do card magic. do you want mind reading like what would. you. like reading Minds yeah read by mind. holy. [ __ ] Jessie tell you just hold your hand. up flat here quickly just a little bit. further apart like that I'll do really. quickly um one of your hands just wiggle. the fingers of one of your hands that.

one okay just close it up keep that. closed but I'm just going to. draw a little heart there a lot of love. with the bad friends isn't there there. really is Sharpie the permanent markers. but look if I were to just pick up a. heart of my hand and just drop it yeah. on your hand open your hand slowly have. a look at what you're holding oh my God. [ __ ] god this has got to be the. tattoo that's insane insane I love wait. can you read you know can you do a mind.

reading thing to me yeah yeah 100% by. the way it's a real. pleasure put a t. on I'll do one of my favorite pieces of. of mentalism for you okay okay um jety. you're going to be my fabulous assistant. I'm just going to give you my wallet. just love there's something inside that. Andrew I want you to think of someone in. your life this can be anyone it can be. like a best mate a relative a loved one. someone you grew up with I would say not. someone in the public night no one. you've mentioned on the podcast you know. it's just but someone who makes you. happy okay I got it you got someone I.

got it when I do magic I kind of like. everyone to be involved I don't do. oneon-one I always want everyone apart. from me to know the name of this person. before we start doing anything people. always accuse me of hearing when a walk. away they all whisper to each other and. we just write the first name so you can. show everyone quietly please don't give. anything away guys whether it's a man or. woman when you all seen it you can just. fold it up okay okay okay yeah yeah fold. it back upold itold it perfect I'll just. take the pen for you yeah you can't have. this well okay you have it no you have.

it okay you guys all saw the name j you. saw it as well fabulous we don't even. need this anymore this is kind of like. evidence now hold your hand out there. just grab all the piece of paper for me. we'll get rid of this in one second but. this person you're thinking about. there's no way I could know this person. no [ __ ] way I mean you haven't said. the name of this person out loud. probably since you've been in the. theater have you he doesn't he doesn't. even know I know he doesn't even know no. way so whoever you're thinking about how. long have you known them before then. since we met when our mom we we met when. we were in nine okay oh wonderful there.

some you have a very deep connection. like my oldest friend in the world. that's perfect juy I gave you my wallet. now that was the very first thing I did. wasn't it yeah that was actually before. I asked you to think of this person. let's have a look in here in my wallet. I've actually got a second wallet this. little mini one inside here look I. zipped up in a compartment I put one of. my business cards I don't want to touch. that can you just grab it out yeah yeah. well we're doing business now we'll just. flip it over yeah flip it over yeah say. hi to Sean for oh my God oh my God oh my. God oh my. God oh my.

God oh my God oh my. God yesterday had half of the sandwich. and that's all I ate all day really and. today I had half a hot dog at um dog. house was that what's it called. dogghouse yeah yeah yeah half of because. I'm trying to lose weight how much you. weigh right now I don't have a scale but. I you have one up here though don't you. yeah I do and I saw a photo of Mez I did. a live show in Austin mhm and I.

looked like the worst I've ever looked. really you think so yeah it was like the. Korean whale like in the movie what is. what's the sound he makes. [Music]. what sh sh kids if you're quiet you can. hear the Korean whales and he says to. his daughter well you have to write down. your feelings and write me a letter or. i' like to see some of your writings. right and instead of [ __ ] candy bar I. have [ __ ] like you know mochi balls.

little tiny Mochi for the and I've got. you know what I mean and then the and. then the nurse lady is white has to be. in the Korean whale are they white in. the Korean whale because in in the whale. she was Asian that's right so let's just. reverse it flip it right and then the. Christian kid that comes over has got to. be an Asian dude if they remake the. whale the whale will you do it I have to. do it move over Brendan Fraser yeah and. I'd be like um what what my gay love.

die he die I eat moochi Bo oh you're sad. yeah and I die in 5 day in five day I'm. gone but I like daughter ride I want you. to ride you have the ability to ride. this look like the bootlegged version. you know right right and then this is. the bootleg and at the very last scene. right I stand up right yeah and I pick. up a. rickshaw a whale with a Rick Shaw and I. go to my daughter but instead of flying. up in the sky I melt down beautiful it's.

beautiful I go to hell why would you go. to hell you don't go to hell I want to. go reverse of with cuz we have to change. the movie a little bit that's right it's. got a flip right people are going to oh. we saw that coming it oh we didn't see. him going to hell right but you see the. whale no oh you don't even know what I'm. talking about no I have no idea honestly. yeah I didn't all that shit's in the. movie didn't see it why cuz brenon. Fraser and I have beef are you being. real we got into a fight six or seven. years ago oh wow on Santa Monica. Boulevard over what. what a parking spot all right I thought.

it was over the laugh he did remember. during the or show we went whatever they. fck what that Meme remember that mem you. did yeah when he CL when he was clapping. laughing you mean I love that guy yeah I. love that guy he kills it in that movie. he had what a Resurgence a guy like that. had a second wind but he cuz I was. watching I was going is it what you know. the hype MH and I was cuz it was the. first time I watched it it was worth it. though you no I was watching it and I. was like holy [ __ ] he's so good in this.

like he just kills it incredible did you. ever have you ever crowd. surfed what do you mean crowd surfed. have you ever crowd surfed I know what. you mean so what do I mean what do I. mean have you ever [ __ ] crowd surfed. have you Bobby have you once okay it was. embarrassing no I've never they dropped. me they did 100% they dropped me oh cuz. they like it when it's like a cool chick. or a skinny guy I was a lumpy bumpy and. they just dropped me yeah but I I.

usually go to yo-yo M concerts and they. don't have that there dude one time I I. stage dive at Ena it was [ __ ] raw D. you did she was she was like or or right. on my face actually dude one time at the. at the punk Premiere party yeah I got up. on the bar it was at the um what's that. bar you used to have standup comedy. shows on. Melrose oh yeah yeah it's on uh was J. Davis room right yeah what was that. called it was called The Parlor the par.

it didn't used to be called that did you. ever play there yeah like 2010 you they. put you up there yeah was was was it. like an open mic or something it wasn't. a [ __ ] Open Mic was it after the good. Comics went it before before yeah they. put you up first exactly oh it was a. book show though yeah I think lenoi was. there oh the good guys what were you. doing you were doing were you doing sets. back then at that place yeah I I we had. the punk Premiere party there and I'm. not kidding I got so wrecked I ripped my. shirt and I jumped on on the bar and I. was like it's the best night of our. Lives everyone's like yeah dude and I.

jumped nobody caught me oh my God face. plant face face plant and I bounced back. up. like yeah idiot I used to be I used to. be picked up sometimes from school yeah. there was like a it was like. a it was a station wagon it was an old. couple that was retired and they would. pick up kids from school and take them. back to the other part of our. neighborhood there was like 10 kids and. we would just be in the back of the. station wagon just rolling around no. seat belts oh wow full speed on Lake sh. Drive I would love to have a time.

machine and pick you up from school okay. here we go no so what happens is no no. what happens is this though okay is one. day I just show up right at a baseball. game or whatever M and I I go hey dude. you don't know. me shut. up what hey you don't know me are you. scared a. little do you like it when when I'm. scared I do because the the person I.

know now like in the future wouldn't be. scared you're from the Future I'm From. the future wow look at me D do we all. have those kind of eyes in the future no. no no it's just I had I was I'm Asian oh. yeah yeah yeah you're what what. happened oh I I stayed out in the sun. too long I should get back inside you. should go back let's go inside okay. let's go to this toy store wow yeah come. on anyway I wish we could buy something. in here wherever you want I can you can. have I can have anything yeah can I have.

this entire GI Joe set yeah and the you. got to listen listen listen listen I am. okay listen but you and I have a. business together in the future 40 years. from now 30 years from now wow yeah and. we talk it's like a radio show I don't. like radio I know but you. will why I don't know why and I also. want to say you're very funny right now. no do your friends say you're funny. sometimes yeah yeah yeah so that's. that's what you're going to do for a. living wow yeah and you don't have to do.

anything you just walk up on stairs you. talk and then you turn on the thing and. you talk anyway so tomorrow I'm going to. pick you up at. school okay what are we going to do we. just want to see the reaction of people. but don't you can't pretend that you. don't know who I am because I just okay. I promise okay next day here we go Hong. Kong hey Andrew help help help what the. [ __ ] what the. [ __ ] work it didn't. work I was too Keen yeah we were too.

Keen I would love to go back in time and. see you as a little kid okay so this do. it. yeah hey little. boy what's up what what sir I'm from the. Future No Sir what do you want I'm. waiting for my mom she's going to pick. me up your mom's not coming. today she's. dead What They're All Dead my dad and. your brother Steve I've got him house. you know my brother's name yeah what did.

you do I haven't done anything yet D to. my mom and dad though oh I killed them. what's my mom's name. [Music]. bong that's not her name that's her. nickname that's what we call her well. from where from the secret club that she. belongs to her name is bong your what's. my dad's name Wong what's okay what's my. last name Chong you don't even know my. you know my last name Fong Lee. you know my last name I blanked out yeah.

you went crazy there with the Chong Wong. fongs yeah yeah by the way imagine. trying to even kidnapping you or I as. kids we'd be the hardest kids to kidnap. why because I was I was such a lunatic I. wasn't going to go with anybody anywhere. oh yeah I didn't even get my parents car. yeah one time I you I ran away from home. one time for like 5 days yeah Jesus I. [ __ ] I was insane when I was a kid I. had no big and if a kid if adult Tred to. hit I'd be like okay he's going to try. to molest me but I'm going to steal his. wallet yeah I'll get some money out of. this right so I'm going to go I'm going.

to I'm going to make this to my. advantage this situation you know what I. mean like I would invite it wouldn't you. yeah yeah I'd trick him and then when. you know once he's like touch I would. grab his I I'd figure it out like that. kid you know the movie Problem Child. remember that movie I did a do I was. that you know I did a what they tried to. do that as a TV show do you remember. that's right yeah you did a pilot for. Problem Child yeah no way yeah they had. yeah they had a kid in it and everything. what happen red red kid as a kid I. wanted I want to see that problem child.

TV I mean you never aired I don't even. yeah probably don't don't but it was him. Matthew lard really it was me Matthew. lard that's all I remember really wow. yeah him he's a great actor I love him. but I remember we did the pilot it was. uh uh it was pretty cool never got. picked up I see that yeah yeah we'd be. we wouldn't be here. today A pilot if a pilot in that era if. it gets picked up maybe you're home free. all right next one Aussie sent this at.

one Tito Bobby and Tito Andrew I've been. trying to go on a weight loss Journey. but my girlfriend says that she wants me. to stay chubby so I won't want to leave. her once I get fit oh that's not nice. she then tells me she wants a BBL even. though I tell her how come she can work. on her body but I can't what should I. tell her a BBL it's that uh Brazilian. buttlift oh oh she wants a buttlift yeah. yeah by the way let me take you guys. into a great chicken wi spot when you're. in my city that's so funny that's so.

funny well that's not going to help you. lose weight yeah uh so what do you think. you should do should he stay chubby for. the love of his girl he should get fit. to leave her let's see what he else can. he can get let's see what else we can. get yeah yeah and also you should send. us photos of of what you look like now. let's see the journey let's see the kind. of puss that you're hunting for now if. you saw if you saw let's say you were a. single anderw yeah and um you know. you're you're and you meet a beautiful. woman sure but she used to waste 700 lb. she weighs 125 now lot of skin she's.

beautiful yeah but when you look at her. stomach it's like a melting it's like a. melted candle it's like it's like a. [ __ ] uh yeah what what do you mcer. painting what do you do uh lift and [ __ ]. you got to lift up those flabs and [ __ ]. my buddy would you pay for skin removal. surgery first 100% first 100% I'm paying. for that yeah yeah cuz you don't want to. [ __ ] a bean. [Laughter]. bag I know right yeah yeah it's if you. did all that work let me reward you you. know what I'm saying like let me get to.

your [ __ ] without having to like but. you store things in the flaps that is. smart like an iPhone charger like you. know what I mean corn. nuts right right that's where my Xbox. controller is a pantry yeah yeah I see. you so wait his qu his original question. was should he stay fat or should he get. fit I think yeah I think for your health. yeah I think you should get fit and if. and if she's going to get her Brazilian. buttlift yeah then you should get fit. and if she's by the way yeah if she's.

afraid of you getting fit and then. leaving her then it was already action. it was already going to happen yeah. projection that's what she's say mad. projection Azie get the weight loss. Journey if you want it you know don't. let her control you what's her name I'm. Mickey Megan and Mickey and you're and. your sister and you're a marine yes sir. thank you for your. service you still AC yeah yeah okay. right now and uh your discrepancy is.

that you actually think he's in what is. it problem well his last Snapchat story. it was him and one of his really good. friends in their skippies and a bathtub. together very Ste you getting. fisted you ask him now oh no yeah. we same haircut and. mustache see look.

yeah Prett good what's the verdict on. this well the only evidence I seem to. have is that you saw some erotic. pictures of him maybe you guys kiss him. yeah maybe you kiss Bobby and. see and that's what they want do it for. your country do it for. [Applause].

[Applause]. [Applause]. Give It. Up. so we were on the flight to um New York.

no Rochester yeah we're going to. Rochester. Rochester that day I had eaten something. bad I had a stomach flu mhm and thank. God you were the guy sitting next to me. on the plane because I got up every 20. minutes I think it was seven or eight. times and I'm not kidding we almost. never sit next to each other because we. either sleep or watch TV so we don't get. seats next to each other but there was. only two seats left and they were next. to each other so we sat next to each. other thank God which was good for him.

because I got up so many times so many. times which I don't mind helping out my. best friend but I actually felt so bad. the amount of times that you went into. the toilet I I was dying the flight. attendant did this to me I'm not even. exaggerating she she walked by and she. goes like. this about you really yeah cuz she could. tell that something was wrong you. visibly upset dude I was sweating was. [ __ ] terrible so you had you had a. bad experience on the flight then we got. to Rochester then I went to the so this. is what happened I went to the airport.

store and I got em modium ad you got you. got three different kinds of of like. different kinds of like diarrhea. suppressant yeah different suppressant I. took a bunch I'm okay this is good right. and but you know what I think it's good. to get it all out yeah don't leave it in. there yeah I left it in there you left. it in because there when there where. there's a will there's always a way. that's right the the Pooh thinks there's. a way there's a way out yeah there's a. way out getting out of this guy one way. or another so then we went to get some. dinner we went back to the hotel right.

that was actually pretty foolish foolish. we waited in line at a Wendy's uh Bobby. gave a homeless guy $20 a $20 bill and. in ex that's right that's right he tried. to give us a folding chair and a trash. can that's right that's right a literal. trash can he go he goes I'll be right. back I gave him the 20 I'll be right. back we see him walk to a trash can a. trash can pull out a [ __ ] chair he. ran back this for you and we're like. where I thought about opening the trunk. and being like put it in yeah we'll take. the chair we said no thank you we got.

our food we ate at the hotel yes Bobby. went to bed I went to I we sat outside. and we chatted great chat good chat not. great good okay slow down insane yeah. great chat you know what I mean yeah I. could I forgot. it then the next morning I'm up getting. coffee with jety Johnson and I get a. text message from our tour manager. saying oh my God what's wrong with the. rooms and I was like what do you mean.

what's wrong with the room the rooms are. fine she goes Bobby needs a new room and. I immediately got mad I was like why. would he need new [ __ ] room they were. nice rooms they were fine what did you. what would you need more so I text and. call text and. call then I finally get the real answer. which is. what is that they had to move you. because there was an accident in the. room yeah what's the accident the D. broke the damn broke while I was. sleeping and it flooded it flooded yeah.

the whole town yeah Bobby [ __ ] the bed. remember in Lord of the Eisen guard yeah. those. trees and it wiped out all those [ __ ]. exact that's exactly what happened but. you you [ __ ] the bed the bed was Eisen. guard in the middle of the night you my. B was a damn got it it was when you were. sleeping you weren't even CAU dude it. was so C the night before here's what's. crazy about it the night before I didn't. sleep at all cuz in my mind I'm like I'm. just going to sleep the 5H hour you know.

what I mean the flight flight and I. couldn't so finally that night I was. like dude I I knew I was going to go on. deep sleep but at like 4: or 5 in the. morning I wake up and the whole bed is. wet soaking wet yeah and I saw the. photos yeah it was bad and Bobby. literally goes I had to move a room I. cried the tour can pay for it and then I. said yeah whatever they'll just have to. buy a new bed and he goes they can't. just clean. it it was okay it was like okay it was.

like a mattress it looked like a. mattress from from Fight Club I have a I. have a question yeah huh I was gonna. Bill Bobby separately for that room yeah. okay yeah just want to confirm that. we're still yeah pooping the bed is a. kind of an individual expense it is is. that the two can't take I don't think so. no I think when you [ __ ] the bed yeah. yeah I think that's on you for my your I. think I think okay okay that's yeah okay. yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah but I love you. God bless but I did support God bless. you joh but I support you and I love you. and here's my favorite part of the whole. story what my heart hurts cuz you know.

you're my best friend and I did say [ __ ]. Bobby feels bad I'm bummed out I felt. bad for you I did yeah I said [ __ ]. let's get him whatever he needs Carlos. go get him [ __ ] from the store I want. him to feel good I walk back into the. lobby from getting. coffee you had just had diarrhea all. night you're eating Arby's you're eating. two cheddar roast beef sandwiches yeah I. was hungry I buddy what wrong with that. you just [ __ ] the bed I was hungry then. get something that's going to settle.

your stomach it released Arby's and my. body's like we need more yeah more and I. was like here's more you know you know. what you know an Aftershock and. earthquake that's what Arby's is for. your [ __ ] it's an Aftershock I. learned that after that yeah and then he. shits again then he had another day and. a half of bathroom Trav bathroom it's. okay I learned a lesson did he did he. learn his lesson oh Arby's no he didn't. because he still goes there right yeah. so well guys I I hope you love uh this. bonus episode uh and if you want to.

watch more amazing Clips a lot of them. we couldn't show here on YouTube because. you guys know like the algorithm won't. let us put certain things in exactly but. patreon doesn't care yeah what do we. have on patreon uh bad coure bad advice. the tour documentary uh adree early. episodes with content that was too hot. for TV Girls Gone Wild Style in the and. we have planned a lot of other things so. go to bad friend so go to patreon.com.

badri if you want ah [ __ ] me go to. patreon.com badri that's. patreon.com bye. [Music]. friends woo. yeah.

woo. yeah.