Chatty Chatty, Bang Bang | Ep 317 | Bad Friends

Hey, Bad Friends. I'm doing a bunch of. shows. First off, Bobby and I, the Bad. Friends Live, are going to be uh at. Netflix as a jokefest here in Los. Angeles at the YouTube theater down by. SoFi. That's May 8th. Get your tickets. right now. Then I'll be down in Delmare. at the Sound in San Diego, bro. Surf's. up. June 28th, I'm doing two shows early. in a late show. And then July 24th, I'm. at the Star Casino in St. Charles, Missouri, which might as well be St. Louis, Missouri. Come out and see me. Go. to Andrewsantino.com for those tickets. Andrewsino.com. Hey everybody, Bobby Lee here. You know,

um I I shot a special and so I'm going. to do the finally tour before the. special comes out. I want to be in. Detroit 424, Indianapolis 425, Montlair. 51, um Atlantic City 52. Just go to my. website and check out the other day. It's Medford 53, San Antonio 515, and go. check it out. Uh my it's going to be a. theater tour, my first one. And come see. me live. Go to bobbye.live. You two are. bad friends. >> Who are these two idiots?

>> A white dude and an Asian dude. You two. are disgusting. >> You two are something. >> We're bad friends. >> It smells like dog food in here. >> Yep. >> Rook. >> Bobby just got here. >> I just got here. Um I yelled at um the. host for putting the mic stand low. You. know how they try to get a laugh? >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Cuz I'm small. >> I've done I've do that. >> I know. And it makes me so angry. But I. won't yell at you. But I went, "If you. ever do that again, I'll rip you.".

>> Oh, I've gotten that from you. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> The low voice. >> Because it's because it's it's it's. trying to get a laugh that I'm sure, right? But it's not my laugh. >> It's their laugh. >> You know what I mean? It's the residue. laugh. >> Yeah. Leftover laugh. >> Yeah. It's leftover laugh when they're. not even on stage. They try to get a. laugh. >> Yeah. >> And they're in the back going. >> I made the mic store. You know, I bet. you Brad gets that. Williams. >> Oh, dude. I do the opposite for him. When Brad follows me in the store, I put.

it as high as I can. >> That's See, that's the same thing. [laughter]. >> It's the same thing. >> But it's funny. >> for you. >> For all of us. >> For Brad, it's [laughter]. >> For Brad, it's a whole extra thing he. has to do. >> That's funny, dude. >> For me, it's a You know what I mean? I. have I get a laugh, but then I have to. go I'm small. >> and do that face like [laughter]. the world God made me, [snorts]. >> right? And then Brad has to bring it. down. >> Yeah, it's funny. >> It's for for the person before. But it's. not our laugh.

>> All right. You know what? We're not. going to do any No more funny stuff. >> No more comedy. >> Okay. [snorts]. >> I think we're done with comedy. >> Yeah. >> All weekend long. >> All weekend long. >> That's not what I'm saying. What I'm. saying is is that. >> No, Brad left his toothbrush here at the. studio. >> He did. [laughter] Yeah. And his pen. And his pen. >> And his pen. Another. thing is um get it off your chest. >> When like one time I was in the O and. Steve Burn halfway during myself grabbed. the mic from the side of the stage and w. w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w. w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w w. walked up on stage and [snorts] then. goes let's do a duo.

Let's play with a crowd. And that made. me so mad. [laughter]. >> This is very funny. You know, he at San. Francisco at the last time I just played. punch, he showed up and he came on stage. at the end of my. >> Did you ask him to come up or did he. just come up on stage? >> He just came up. >> No. Are you being real? >> I'm being serious. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> But I welcomed it with open arms. I. thought it was. >> Yeah, I don't welcome open arms. >> You didn't want it. >> He's half Korean. >> Oh, he's not a full Yeah, you got to be. a fully to pull that kind of stunt. You. got to be a full Yeah, you got to be a. full I actually totally agree.

>> Yeah. Yeah. It No, because it's like I'm. in the middle of a setup and all of a. sudden, what's up? without asking. And. it's just like I I don't like that. >> Also, from a from a outsers's. perspective, it looks like your Korean. uncle who's got it together cuz he wears. a suit is coming to like. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Like talk you down a little bit. Let me. do comedy for you. Yeah. >> Cuz you wears suits and we wear clothes. >> Yeah. I also don't like this. I just. realized. Right. >> Give it to me. Give me the idol. >> I'm going to give you the the feature. smile.

>> What is it? So what what happens is. you're [laughter]. you're backstage. >> because I just played the San Jose. improv and Ramsay Badawi had a really. good set before me. >> And so there's a curtain and he opens it. and he has a smile. [laughter]. >> at you. >> Yeah. Like he knows he killed, >> right? >> Oh yeah. >> And he go if you do feature smiles. again. >> No feature smiles. >> No, no, no. I need a frown. >> I know how well you did. I heard it. I. tell my features, "No smiling at all. No.

comedy." I say, "Go up there, say. hello.". >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Tell people where you're from. Yeah. >> Tell them the favorite foods you have. >> Yeah. >> And that's it. And then get off. Yeah. >> Bring up the headliner. >> And then the last thing I want to Can I. just get off my chest? >> I love stuff on your chest. [laughter]. >> Pause. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Are you being real? >> Yeah. I want you to get it off your. chest. >> Okay. So, um, >> what? >> I hate needy hosts. M. >> was that good funny? No, I had a local,

you know, nice girl. She's already I. already brutally, you know what I mean? Verbalized it to her. >> Well, then so should we be talking about. it? >> Yeah. Well, I I could just be vague. about it. >> It's going to ruminate feelings again. then for her. She's going to hear this. 100% and be like, "That's about me.". >> No, maybe it's going to teach her a. lesson. >> Teach. [laughter]. >> Did she bomb? No, no, she did great. >> Oh, well then okay. >> No, she did great. I think she has a. future.

[laughter]. >> I do. >> Okay. >> Yeah, >> you're not selling me on it. >> Yeah. Yeah, but can I. >> be a car salesman? She has a future. >> Well, how is this? Welcome to open mic. night lot. >> What? >> The open mic night lot. >> Oh, it's at the lot. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We have many new. new open up micers here. >> All new new. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We've got um look at. this uh one. This is a Oo, >> this one's called Catbird. >> really quick. >> Snappy. >> Yeah. And it's like, you know, I mean,

and it's an engine that grows. >> Yeah. Yeah. You know, I mean, it's a. slim design, right? And it creates food. >> She was a chef. >> She [laughter] No, she was married to a. chef. >> No, she was a chef. She was a chef. >> She was a Michelin star chef. >> That's not true. >> She worked at Michelin star restaurants. as a chef. >> That doesn't make you a Michelin star. chef cuz you worked at a [ __ ]. >> She pour water. >> Yeah. [laughter] I I I. water. >> basil [laughter]. at the end.

>> Yeah. >> The last line person that does the herbs. or whatever. >> She go water up. >> Yeah. Scoop of uh. >> scoop of caviar on top. >> Just one little caviar scoop. >> Yeah. Yeah. And the chef goes, "TOO MUCH. CAVIAR. >> WHAT ARE YOU [ __ ] DOING?". >> YEAH. YEAH. YEAH. Um anyway, um. >> get it off your chest. >> So this is Capper. Um this is another. model we have. Okay. Is it? Yeah. >> Is it foreign? >> No, it's black. It's a black sleek. color. Call it a Devontre. >> Oh, this is this is a good car. >> It's a gray car.

>> Yeah. Fast. >> It's the It's also the bestselling. >> It's got to be. Yeah. >> Yeah. This car though. [laughter]. >> You're going to love this car. [laughter]. >> This car right here. Right. >> No. If it doesn't look like. >> it asks a lot of questions. >> Too many questions. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's like Nightrider. [laughter]. >> It talks. It talks the whole time. >> It talks the whole time. You can't turn. it off. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Hello. You know what I. mean? You're driving too fast. [laughter]. All the rules. You know what I mean? It. talks a lot. >> It talks a lot.

>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There's no off button. >> Oh, there's no switch. >> No. >> Unless you turn it off. >> Unless you're really. >> Yeah. Maybe it's talking to itself at. night. You know what I mean? >> But Yeah. Yeah. >> Maybe it'll run out of gas. >> But it's a lot of like, you know, I. mean, you know, so what? How do I make. it to this? How do I do this? >> Inquisitive. >> Inquisitive. Like, you know, I mean, how. do you make it? You know, I mean, who. how do I get an a agent? this and that, you know what I mean? And then it's. like, you know, you have to go, "Hey, hey, hey, stop. [laughter]. You have to have that conversation of.

like, you know, you know, >> I'm the polar opposite." I'm like, "I'll. give you an Excel spreadsheet on how to. do everything that you're asking me to. do.". >> No, I did. I I I did tell her what to. do. >> You do. You give her the hints. >> Yeah, I gave her like this is what you. do. And then I But I don't think that. she got what I was saying. >> Well, you can lead a horse to water. Uh. but it'll eventually be glue. [laughter]. That's. >> That's what they say. That's the It's. going to be It's going to be Meanwhile, Carlos is wearing a win hat. >> Mhm. >> Yeah, cuz you guys were at the win. >> Do you bought that hat or they give us. those hats? >> No, I bought it. I like I got the same.

one at Caesars years ago. >> I know. I remember. >> I like this specific hat. >> It's uh I have my Circus Circus hat at. home. [laughter]. >> I should have brought it in. >> Fancy got that Stratosphere hat. >> everywhere I go in the casino. >> Yeah. >> Where's [ __ ] Bobby, bro? Yeah. Yeah. >> Where's Bobby? >> I get that every time at the airport. >> Why can't we make a shirt that says. where's Bobby? >> Where's Santino? >> We should make sure to say where's. Bobby. >> Yeah, >> we had a great time. By the way, I had. an a conversation with my driver, my.

Uber driver on the way to the airport. So nice. So nice. But I was very tired. Yeah, >> we had a long weekend. I just kind of. wanted to chill. >> And he was chatty chatty. He was. inquisitive. He was chatty chatty bang. bang. He was very inquisitive. >> You You don't know the rules? >> What do you mean? >> What you do? >> What do I do? I open with a statement. >> You say, "I don't want to talk.". >> No. >> What do you say? >> Okay. Hey, dude. I'm going to be. listening to music, so if you need. anything, just, you know what I mean? Kind of put your hand up. >> But he was a fan. >> But my earphones aren't even on. [laughter].

>> Okay. So, the Uber driver, super nice. guy. He's a big fan. Loves bad friends. Loves you. >> How do you know? >> He vocalized. >> Verbally [laughter]. >> or through hand language or. >> nonverbal? >> It was non-verbal. Through facial. expressions. He goes, "Bad friends.". >> Yeah, that's verbal. >> He went, >> "Yeah, that's bad friends." Yeah. Yeah. Okay. >> No, this is bad friends. And. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, he did that. >> He said he loved us. >> Yeah. >> And then he was talking and I said he.

was talking. He was like, "Oh, I just. drove back from LA." Blah blah blah blah. blah. >> He's like, "I've been in the car for. like 30 hours or something like that." I. was like, "Oh, that's crazy." And he. said, "I got a gift sent to me from my. home country for my sister's wedding or. something. I had to go pick it up." I. said, "Oh, that's cool. Where where. originally from?" uh Pakistan and. immediately I'm in like a mood like he's. trying to talk about and I just all I. kept thinking about was those videos. from Pakistan that's like do you love. Pakistan [laughter]. >> do you know those videos and I started. talking to him he goes I love those. videos one day I'm going to be pilot I.

dude what will you do for Pakistan and. so I'm literally just yelling at him. like that in the car I'm not even. letting get another word out I keep. going I love Pakistan is great and then. he goes I have no problem with that I'm. Pakistani I have Indian friends and. >> he so he's opened up this gate. I'm like. oh no I just think the videos are funny. He's like no but I understand there's a. lot of hatred in the world right now as. far as and I was like oh no I think he. >> oh no. >> and he goes and I'm Muslim and he goes. my barber is Jewish and I was and then. he start keep talking I go Jewish barber.

[laughter]. >> out of have you ever Jewish barber? >> Yeah. >> Is that a thing? >> Yeah. >> I mean how what a disappointment for the. family. Does that Jewish barber go to. another an American barber to attack the. Muslim guy? [laughter]. >> No. But he says, "I'm Muslim." And he. goes, "Well, I'm not a practicing.". >> Yeah. >> He's like, "I'm not like, you know, praying five times a day." And then that. logged in my brain for the rest of the. time. I couldn't hear what he said. Five. times is a lot of times. >> a day. He says he prays five times a. day. >> Not anymore. He c it's exhausting.

>> Yeah. >> But also, why would they do that? Why. not breakfast, lunch, and dinner? It's. called Fajir, Sunrise, Dur, Assur, Mghreb, and Issha. >> But the thing is is that it can be. quick. >> All right. Do a prayer right now. Go. >> That's it. [laughter]. >> I mean, >> wait, you are facing east. So, >> yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that how quick. was that prayer? >> That was really good. >> And if I did that five times, >> imagine I mean I mean it's over. >> If Bobby [laughter]. If Bobby was Muslim.

>> Yeah. >> and had to pray. Yeah. >> You know the little rug that they have? >> Oh, yeah. Imagine how he would have the. most like fancy vintage cool rug. He. would have to have the dopest rug out of. all the rugs. >> It would be the high-end Monontlair rug. [laughter]. >> It would be a fancy coat. Yeah. Yeah. >> Is that a Goyard prayer rug? [laughter]. >> Yeah. It would be the dope. >> You would have a fancy rug. >> Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And. different brands though, too. I would do. a Balenciaga a Balenciaga rug. You know. what I mean? just for like a a Friday.

I'm about clubbing, [laughter] you know. what I mean? I would have a Monontlair. one. I would have a um if Golden Goose. had a rug, that'd be cool. >> I guarantee you they'd make. >> And then a made one rug where it's like. kind of tattered and looking old school. [laughter] like, >> you know what I mean? From like a 50s. >> It's a vintage. >> It's a vintage but brand new rug. [laughter]. >> Let's get you Muslim, dude. >> Yeah, I'll get Muslim. >> Sign up. Sign up and go Muslim. Why not? >> Well, five times is a lot, you know? It's just a lot of times to stop and. roll out to it's it. >> I would probably go Zoroastriism.

>> There's only like 600 of them on planet. Earth. And I don't know exactly what. they practice, but that seems like what. it's also before Christ. >> You mean so before Christianity? >> You mean BC? >> Yeah, BC. So it's like um I think I. would go with Zoro. >> That's how cocky Christians are. What. >> they name time before their own time, but it's still their time. >> Exactly. BC still is us. You're like, "Well, Christ not exist yet." Like, I. know, but it's still our time. >> cuz it's always been.

>> That's [snorts] awesome. >> I mean, how do you feel about um I think. I'm being affected about the world. around me. What's the war and all that. stuff you know? >> I was at Marshmallow nightclub last. night. [laughter]. >> I don't know what's going on in the. world, dude. >> We went out till 4:30, 5 in the morning. >> Yeah. >> Unbeliev What are we doing? We were at. They were like, "You want to go to. Marshmallow?" I was like, I Yeah, I. guess. >> Yeah. Wow. You went to Marshmallow, huh? >> I didn't go to that. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, he. went to his room. >> I went to Sprinkles. >> I got cupcakes. >> You do? [laughter].

>> Yeah. >> I see the Sprinkles in San Jose. The. Sprinkles cupcake vending machines. There's no way they're making money. You. don't want to buy it out of. >> No, no, no. That's How long has it been. in there? >> It has closed down. >> Yeah. >> Oh, it's closed down. >> They're all closed. >> LA. >> But do you buy do you buy um like. headphones from the from the kiosk? >> So, one time I did have to buy because I. forgot mine on a long trip. So, and I. thought, who's buying it? I was. [laughter]. >> I was a guy. People. And I'm sitting there too and I'm. ashamed. People People passing by like, "Dude, who buys that? What are you. doing?".

>> But imagine like, you know, like when. you buy a candy bar and it gets stuck, right? You're like, "It's 60 cents, right?" But an AirPod, >> but dude, an AirPod, a Bose, you know. what I mean? AirPods. [laughter] That's. $300. Imagine that getting stuck and. you're like banging up the [ __ ]. machine. It's $300. >> You're buying meta glasses and they're. stuck. >> Imagine. Imagine a kid getting stuck in. there. You know how they do in [ __ ]. those um crawl the machine. [laughter]. The cray machine. >> How do they get. >> some nerd is in there? Yeah. Yeah. Some. nerd kid is in there. You know what I. mean? [laughter].

>> Some sweet little nerd. >> Yeah. Wow. >> Wait. So San Jose was good, >> you know? >> You love it up there. >> Well, I mean I played that room for over. 20 years and it's like it's very. comfortable. But it's, you know, it's. the same thing where it's like. >> I got to do that place. >> Yeah. It's a great club. >> I never done it. >> Wow. >> I know. I just never did an improv run. >> Wow. Oh, it's it's a theater. You'll. love it. >> No, no, I just mean I've only done a few. improvs. I never really did a bunch of. improvs. Yeah. >> But you used to do that all the time. >> I'm I'm an improv guy. >> But you used to do San Jose like twice a.

year. >> sometimes. Yeah. >> It's crazy. >> It's a great audience. But um you know. how um I've been going to the comedy. store for so long that when I go in. there, I feel nauseous. >> Well, what do you mean? Cuz it's I cuz. I've been there so long that it just. kind of makes me want to go this again. >> What? >> Yeah. Like there's a nausea that. happens. >> You're losing the love of the store. >> No, I I've always loved it, but it's. just like it's like, you know, um going. into your living room. >> I love my living room.

>> Oh, you do. You don't feel nauseous? [laughter]. >> Sick in my house. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> You can experience nausea from visiting. the same place repeatedly due to several. factors and condition responses, environmental triggers. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I I've had a lot of. trauma at the store back in the day. I I. don't know. There's just something about. that. But but San Jose improv has the. same effect. >> You get nauseous when you go. >> when I walk into the I just feel. nauseous. >> Well, that's not good. >> It's not good. It's just because I've. been going there for so long and it's. just like. >> you should stop then. >> Well, no. I mean, maybe.

I'm day nine not smoking. >> You guys come on. That's it. >> That's a huge deal. >> Day nine is I think they say what's the. day that you stop? What's like the. crest? What day is like you finally get. over the hump of not smoking? It's got. to be like two weeks. You got to be. getting close. I want this for you so. bad. After the first week, okay, so 7 to. 10 days is is when you're going to start. to clear up and then two to four weeks, you're going to be clean, ready to rock. and roll. >> Yeah. Yeah. So anyway, um maybe that had. something to do with it, but there's.

always a kind of a it's it's um. also what bum me out was. so the Friday fur show um you know it's. a theater so it's like I I go to the. balcony and it's empty. >> What do you mean? >> No one's there. >> The show's not on yet? >> No, it's starting. >> and you're on the B and No one So it's. not sold out upstairs. it. They said. it's all sold out. >> People buy tickets that don't show up.

all the time. >> I know, but what happened was um this is. a date a year ago. I never just showed. up. [snorts]. I just didn't show up. >> You rescheduled it. >> Yeah. So, it was rescheduled. So, all. the tickets from that. >> ah. >> transferred over this. Right. So, like a. lot of people just didn't show up. >> Yeah. >> Right. And I um it bummed me out. >> I understand. Oh, >> the co the [ __ ] cookies. Look at the. cookies they little made for me in the. show was really nice. This one's kind of. my favorite. I'm not going to lie. >> Well, I'll have the one with me on it. >> You know what's so funny about this.

cookie? That's old Bob. Do you notice. that? >> That's old Bob with long hair. Old Bob. And I saw a video of you posted on the. internet with old hair. Old Bob hair. >> Yeah. >> And it made me miss the long hair. >> I'm growing it up. >> You have to. >> I am. >> Cuz I love when you have long hair. >> I I am. I'm growing up. >> cuz old bob hair. I like that when it. was that long. Like. >> Oh, it's Oh, it's going to be long. >> There's videos when we first started. this podcast. >> Yeah. >> Your hair was insane. Your hair was. insane. >> I know. You know who didn't get high. this weekend? Carlos. He was a good boy. in Vegas, no less. >> He does it behind your back. >> No, he doesn't. He does.

>> I smoked weed. Remember I told you I was. vaping it in the room. [laughter]. >> You were? Yeah, I told you. You said. you're not doing anything. >> What kind of boss are you, dude? >> Well, not a good one. >> Yeah, you're right. Right behind your. back. He even says it to you and you. don't even [ __ ] listen. >> Well, I'm a great boss. >> No, you're not a great boss. >> NO, I'M A GOOD BOSS. >> NO, you're not a good boss, DUDE. HE'S. LIKE A GOOD BOSS. Your your employee. goes, "Hey, hey, boss. I'm smoking weed. right in front of your face. >> Yeah. >> And you're like, "He didn't do any drug. this weekend." Yeah. Yeah. >> You'd be a bad dad, dude. >> I'm trying to I would not be a bad.

>> Yeah. You're a bad dad, dude. >> Oh, you know why? Because I'm cool. Okay, I'm You know what? >> I know. Here's here's the problem. Here's the problem. >> Yeah. >> When he vapes, I don't know if it's weed. or if it's vape. >> He just said he told you you he was. doing [laughter] it. >> I was not paying attention. I WAS BUSY. >> WAIT, WAIT. How did you say it? >> I'm Andrew. Now, look at me. >> Look at me. Right. Okay. >> And what is Andrew doing? >> Andrew goes, "You're being a good boy, right?" And I go, "Oh, yeah. Okay. Let. me You're being a good boy, right?". >> He goes, "Uh, no." I forget what else he. says, but I go, "Let me just say it the.

way you. >> Okay. >> Who cares what he says? >> Let him play the scene.". >> Yeah. Yeah. Let me play the scene, right? >> All right. You're Andrew. >> Yeah. Yeah. You're being a good boy, huh? >> Your your lip is bleeding. >> Oh. [laughter]. >> Yeah. Put some blood on your lip. >> Yeah. >> It's fine. Go. >> No. I I need blood. >> You got it. See, he This is. >> I need. >> An actor prepares. >> Yeah. Yeah. I need. >> An actor prepares. Isn't there some red. there? >> Yeah. [laughter]. [sighs and gasps]. >> You're being a good boy, huh? [laughter].

>> No, I'm just vaping weed. Don't worry. about it. >> That's what you did. >> I was worried about my show. I was. thinking about the set. [laughter]. >> What did I really say when you told me. you were vaping? >> You said that that was worse than. smoking joints. >> Yeah, it is. What's in those [ __ ]. things? >> Oh, so then you did know. You're being. So, you lied to me. No, I just forgot. [laughter]. >> Ziotics. >> You know, sometimes I like to go out, have a couple of sodas responsibly. I'm. an adult, but when I drink, alcohol gets. converted into a toxic byproduct in the.

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>> quint.com/badfriends. >> I'm like at the San Jose Improv, right? They have a security guy that walks me. to my hotel and I'm like I. stop. >> Yeah, but they do that for they do. >> I don't need I know where to go. >> Yeah, but you're easily attackable. [laughter]. >> No, dude. >> People attack you all the time. But but. before like the other rest of the day. >> you're free. >> I'm just walking around alone in the. same areas and stuff like that. Why in. this specific incident? >> Because you're under their toutelage.

right there. You're under there they if. you got hurt it'd be on them during that. when they're done with you. >> I think once I get out of the club it's. free. >> I agree. >> Yeah. Yeah. I think it's like you know. what I mean? Our responsibility is over. >> You like it? >> I I don't cuz I always tell him like you. please just stay here. >> But he does like to um smoke. Back in. the day, he would smoke behind the. security guard and walk and very like. like gallivant behind the security and. like dart his noise. I did it. You never. sultry. Yeah, you did. When we were on. tour, you'd be walking behind the. security and you do this. You'd be like. sexually smoking.

>> No, you never SEE ME DO THAT. >> YES, YOU WOULD. >> YOU'RE PISSING ME OFF. >> EVERYONE'S NODDING. EVERYONE'S [ __ ]. NODDING. >> YOU You're pissing me off. I've never. done that. >> You would romantic. Okay, dude. I've never done this. >> That's not the face. No, don't do. >> All right. What [laughter] are you. doing? No, you you would like cool like. very. >> but I I'm you're you're doing this with. your hand. >> You do when you walk with No, I don't. Do I Do I. >> When you walk with your cigarette, you. kind of bob a little bit when you walk. and then you'll smoke and then your eyes. will be darting all romantic. >> I'm listening to the Doobie Brothers or. something. No, you're not.

>> Yeah. Yeah. I bop, [laughter] dude. I. bop when I listen to the Doobie. Brothers. >> You're dooop. >> Listen to the music, [laughter]. >> dude. So, it's like I'm doobie. brothering it. >> It's romantic, though. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But it's like And I. don't know if that's a security guard. You're saying that behind the security. guard. I'm doobie brother. >> You would dub brother. >> All right. Okay. >> So, anyway, I took mushrooms last night. >> Can you put that in? >> I Yeah, I felt amazing. It was. >> When was the last time you took. mushrooms? >> Couple weeks ago. >> Oh, but was it a more of a dosage?

>> This one was higher. >> Yeah, much higher. >> Yeah, because I've been micro doing. >> Oh, you've been ming for my mental. health. I'm genuinely happy. >> And I I heard it helps. >> Uh I do feel much better at night. >> Yeah. When I micro dose, I do feel like. the end of the day, I don't have as much. anxiety before I go to bed because I. used to lay in wake in bed at night. >> I haven't come 3 weeks. >> Start micro doing, dude. >> Yeah. Yeah. Because of Alexa Pro. >> Wait, really? >> Yeah. >> So, you can't nut? >> I can't cut. >> What comes out? >> I can't nut. Nothing. I mean, I haven't. even tried.

>> Really? >> Yeah. It's weird. >> Do they they have something to combat. that? They do. No. One, two, three. Blue. [laughter]. Now, blue two gold. Yeah. An oxin and molo. [laughter]. It's the main ingredient. Anoxin. >> The two ones that I can't say. [laughter]. >> No, I did. And I watched I watched my. cousin play roulette. Uh, and I was. feeling fantastic. >> Oh, your cousin was there. >> Yeah. >> Was he juicing too or what? >> He was having a great time.

>> Yeah. Yeah. >> He is. >> He's so funny. >> But then when I was using in Mexico, we. weren't doing that. >> Oh, yeah. >> Who? You and I. We were not having a. good time when you were using in Mexico. because. >> Yeah, but because why is it not like why. couldn't we have those. >> because you're a drug addict and you. have no control. >> because you [laughter] you you don't use. until you get high and feel good. You. use until it's uh unmanageable, till. there's poop on the walls and you're. screaming and you're pointing in my face. in front of people going, "You [ __ ]. lied. This is this has no [laughter].

booze in it. You [ __ ] liar in front. of everyone.". >> You know who I am? You I mean I'm I'm uh. I'm Ren from Ren and Stimpy. [laughter]. >> Yep. Yeah, you are. >> Yeah. Is Stimpy the dog? Ren's the dog, right? >> Ren's a little weird dog. >> Yeah. Yeah. I'm Because I love Ren. because Ren's so paranoid. >> Yeah, that's Yeah. >> You know what I mean? And he gets in. people's faces and he has these. delusions, you know what I mean? >> And I I love that character. >> Somehow you're both of these guys. >> I think so. I think I am random and. simp. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> But I love that cartoon. But anyway, um.

yeah, I I ran out when I I'm like. >> It's just when you you're up you're up. to something. >> No. And then you pointed in my face and. yelled at me in front of everyone. because you wanted booze and I lied to. you and I got you. >> Yeah. Yeah. Because I'm no dumb dumb. >> I know what you're doing. >> But you were so [ __ ] up. >> I know. But I know what you're doing. >> Well, protecting you. >> Yeah. Yeah. But I can I'll just get my. own drink. >> I mean, you flew to Mexico with a. suitcase full of. >> full of drugs. Filled of drugs. You open. your suitcase. >> and I guess what? I flew back with no. drugs. >> Yes. >> Yeah. Because of us.

>> No, I did it all. [laughter]. >> Okay. >> Okay. >> You're right. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's called magic. >> That is called magic. >> in a weird way. [laughter] Okay. So, it's like But we never had that. When. next time I go out. >> No, you're not going. >> Yeah. Yeah. No. No. Shut the [ __ ] up. All right. I'm tired of this [ __ ]. [ __ ] I'm boss, too. [snorts]. >> All right. >> You're boss number two. [laughter]. >> Yeah. I'm like the vice president. >> Yeah. >> I'm JD Vance. >> You kind of are. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> A little fancy. >> Yeah. You know, >> you're not going to go out.

>> What I'm saying is the next time I go. out, you know what I mean? God forbid it. doesn't happen, right? I want a night I. want to go to Marshmallow. >> Okay. >> You can go to Marshmallow without using. >> No, no. No. I want to go to Marshmallow. I want to be on Shrooms. I want to be on. Ketamine. You know what I mean? I want. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I want to go to. Vegas. I want to be able to like walk. out of a [ __ ] bathroom and go. Are. you okay? [laughter]. >> You know what I mean? But actually have. cocaine in my nose. >> No. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I want that next time. It's never going to happen, but.

hypothetically it could. And what I'm. saying is is that the next time don't. cut me out. >> I won't. >> Cuz the last time I went out, you cut me. out. You were all being parental. >> Yeah, cuz you were you were. >> It doesn't matter. No, I want good. times. >> Carlos. Carlos. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Oh, so you're mad that we were. protecting you. >> I don't want to be protected, dude. I. No, I want to go to Marshmallow, you. know. I mean, I want to go out with. Andreas, you know what I mean? And have. those times. >> We can do it without alcohol. >> No, no, no. Next time. No, we can't have. those times because I'm all [ __ ]. Christian on the road now. You're not.

Christian on the. >> Yeah. Yeah. But I'm like I'm going to. bed now. >> Yeah, but we did that too. I do that. >> I know you eventually did, but like I do. it at like 11. >> Yeah. >> You know, so my point being is is that. you know you guys can have your all your. Vegas night life and still and I I get. cut out when I'm out. >> Well, it's cuz you can't because you're. >> Yes, I can. >> You're a drug addict. >> It's a label and I refuse to believe it. >> I know I am one. >> You are. [laughter]. >> I am. And I. >> He is. >> Yeah, >> I know. But he's not. But why is he. okay?

>> He's He's not okay. We're very control. >> I KNOW. BUT THEN WHY WHEN I WHEN I. wasn't okay? >> Because we care more about you than. Carlos. >> Cuz you make more money. [laughter]. >> That's the way the world works. You're. famous. You're worth more in this world. >> Oh, so if you passed away from an. overdose? >> No. If I like made a movie, all of a. sudden y'all would like talk to me more. probably and care more about my health. >> I talk to you every day. I should have. said more about this bit is so stupid. We care about all of you equally. difference is you have control of your. addiction right now. >> He does not.

>> I know, but. >> but I can't do anything. What do you. want me to do with him? >> Fire him? >> Should we fire him? >> Maybe. Maybe when he's like, you know. what I mean? Hey, hey, Dad. >> I'm smoking weed right in front of you. >> That's not bad though to just smoke. weed. If I'm just smoking weed, that's. so chill. That's like going to war and. just like showing up for a day with a. gun. >> Or you're like just outside of Car. Island. >> Yeah. I It's. >> You're You're on a ship. You're a man. >> Yeah. Just. >> you don't know if you're going to attack. Car Island yet. >> Is that what it is?

>> I don't know what Car Island [laughter]. is. >> Do you know what Car Island is? Oh, it's. an island right there. That. >> one of your Antarctica theories. >> No, it's not a theory. >> It's an Iranian island. You mean they. have, you know what I mean? Um, oil. reserves there and and. >> Tik Tok is full of. >> You've been You've been watching so. [laughter] much. >> Like, I know how much Iran stuff you've. been looking at now. It's all day every. day. I know. 24 hours a day. I mean, you. understand what I was saying before. >> You have to stop. >> Is there a Car Island?

>> Yes. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And what's on. Car Island? >> Probably oil reserves. >> Godzilla. >> Yeah. A bunch of sand. >> Yeah. Oh my god. Now he's being [ __ ]. racist. >> Stop. [laughter]. >> That's not racist. >> THERE'S MORE SAND. EVERYWHERE HAS SAND. >> OKAY. >> There's oil reserves. >> Exactly. That's what I just said. >> Target Island is a 7.7 square mile coral. island in the Persian Gulf that serves. as Iran's primary oil export terminal. >> Right. And and and there's now like. questions if the US Marines are going to.

charge Car Island, take control of it, >> dude. So good. David Atenboroough has. the Marines chomp, [laughter]. you know. >> Yeah. I mean, I'm sorry. I'm consumed. about the war. >> Why? You're not a soldier. >> I'm an American citizen. I just paid. $130 at the pump. >> Okay. >> And I and I drive a moped. [laughter]. >> That's a lot, dude. All right. Very fair. >> I drive a moped. >> Was that how much gas was? $130 to fill. up your tank. >> No, it was like 80 something. But I. usually pay.

>> $80. >> Yeah, but I used only pay and that's my. my small car. $55. $50. >> Do you do the cheap gas? >> No, I do the Supreme. >> Good. >> What does that mean? >> That's actually a really good question. >> Yeah. Well, I mean I I never knew. Can. you explain to me the three different. unled unleted premium and then Supreme? Can you. >> Cool cars get the fancy one and the. shitty one? >> It's like air water. [laughter]. Oh, it is. No, tell tell me the. difference cuz I don't know. >> So, I will tell you. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> So, a combustion engine, right? >> Well, explain that. >> Let's start [laughter] with a car.

[laughter]. >> So, a car. >> Start with a car. Start with a car. >> Beep beep. >> Yeah. >> Vroom vroom. >> Oh, okay. Beep beep vroom vroom. Okay. Hold on. >> So, a combustion engine, right? Little. explosions have to take place within. these pistons, right? And these pistons. that are in your car that fire that make. it go fast and have have torque, right, and have power and drive. >> Yeah. >> Higher [clears throat] octane, right? The higher octane numbers, they fire at. a cleaner and faster rate. So faster,

nicer cars like F1. They need highest. octane levels. >> So they do Supreme, >> they do their own. They have a different. octane. They have octane that we can't. get. F1 gas. >> How do we I need that? >> How did we get that? >> I don't think your moped can handle. that. [laughter]. >> It can. No. >> Oh, all right. All right. >> I doubt it. >> Yeah. >> No, but it's higher octane gas. It burns. cleaner and it fires. It fires cleaner. and it's al cleaner for the engine. Higher octane, but it's more expensive. >> But that's what it is. >> That's essentially why people do that. >> All right. So,

>> but people who have like a just a luxury. car like [snorts] say someone has a BMW, >> okay, >> and just a regular BMW and they put in. the most expensive, highest octane, >> it's meaningless. they should just put. him. The only reason you would need a. higher octane level in your car is if. your engine requires a a higher minimum. because of the performance of the. engine. So performance cars need them. >> So in when my my Hyundai, >> you know what I mean? >> Your moped. >> in my moped, right?

>> I put Supreme in, right? Just thinking. that it's better for the engine or. whatever. It's pointless. >> No, it is hypothetically better for the. engine. It's going to burn cleaner. Well, don't then Well, then that I'll. just keep doing that. >> But it's not going to make your engine. any It's not going to make your your. It's not going to make your moped go. faster. >> I I'm not trying to go vroom v room v. room v room v room v room v room v room. v room v room v room. >> So So then put in the cheapest. >> Yeah, but I want my engine to be. healthy. >> It's not even your car. >> Oh, that's right. >> Yeah, you're going to give it back. >> I am giving it back. >> Yeah, don't do that. Who cares if it's a. lease, by the way, to every American. If. it's a lease, [ __ ] put the shittiest. gas in there you can find. Go to.

Sinclair where the dinosaur is where. it's like $186. Real [ __ ]. >> I go to the tarpets. [laughter]. >> I scoop it. I scoop it. I stick it in. the. >> manually do it. >> Yeah, I manually do it. [laughter]. >> This is the funniest thing about the. cookies that I'm ging on because they're. delicious. Yeah. >> Is they were like doing shout out to, you know, they did white noise cookie, the whiskey ginger, they did bad. >> Yeah, but you did the John Cena movie. >> What do you mean? We're never going to. be cool leads in a thing. >> Yeah, but people think that you're cool. already.

>> Whom? >> I'm sorry. When you were in Vegas, did. no one come up to your show up to your. show and buy a ticket? Well, Carlos can. actually tell you unfortunately nobody. came. [laughter]. >> [ __ ] bummer, man. >> Yeah, it was a huge. >> Oh, it was a bummer. Yeah. >> Oh, my bad. >> We went out for a nice little fancy. dinner. >> We had a great little dinner. >> Carlos paid the bill. >> That's unbelievable. >> He paid the bill. >> through my tour money. >> You haven't paid me yet. >> We haven't even started. >> through my tour tour money.

>> Yeah, we You haven't paid me yet. >> But but your f future tour money. >> I paid him. Hey, my my future tumor. >> I paid Delilah with future money. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That which is my. money. >> Yeah. I said Bobby will pay you in four. months. >> Yeah. Yeah. So I pay for your dinner. >> Hey. >> Yeah. >> You know he didn't pay for the dinner. [laughter]. >> You know damn well. >> In fact, I don't think any of them have. paid for the dinner. >> I have paid for dinner before. >> Which one? >> Wait a minute. Time out. Before you get. it, what are you raising your hand for? When have you paid for a dinner? >> I paid for our breakfast one time. >> When? >> When? I was over there at the white.

place with the with the uh with the with. the weird square. >> Oh, you and him. Was it a cool clan. rally? What? What? [laughter]. >> No, we we. >> I definitely wasn't there with the white. hoods and the white faces. Yeah. I mean, where'd you go? [laughter]. >> Let's get ginger one day. >> But cuz I didn't have my wallet or. something. >> No, you were like, "You're paying. today." I said, "Okay.". >> Oh, okay. Good. That's good. Good. Have. you ever paid a meal for me? >> We don't We've We've gone We've gotten. food together once. >> That's so not true. Just me and you. together. >> Which one? Where was it?

>> It was We You took me to sushi around my. birthday. >> Where was it? >> And then we went to see the Mission. Impossible. >> That's right. We've done stuff together. >> I know. That was one thing. >> One time. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. It was one time. >> But a great one. >> Oh, no. It was great. But yeah, [laughter] of course. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't do like little. like, you know, I mean, white hats, white face, you know what I mean? Breakfast places. >> We don't do that at breakfast. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think you do a nice. sushi restaurant in a [ __ ] fine ass. movie tickets, right? You I don't do. white face, white head. You know what I. mean? Yeah. So, it's like. >> Did you just fart? >> No, it was it was it was a.

>> But yeah. Um, so you've car Andreas, have you ever paid for a meal? >> I don't think so. I don't think we ever. been to a meal together. >> Well, as bad we have. >> As a group, we have a group. Yes. >> Yeah. Yeah. You don't think? Yeah. Oneonone we've never had a meal. together. >> No, I don't think we have that kind of. relationship. >> Yeah. [laughter]. >> He's just too cool for us now. He's got. a kid. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> He's over it. kind of makes me [clears throat] mad. [laughter].

It's just that whole thing. You know, I'll be I'll be honest. I. think it's on you. >> No. >> Yeah. There's no. You know, I call you a lot. You know. what I mean? You only text me. I call. you a lot. You only text me. I think. it's you. >> I know that's not true, but I'm just. going. >> No, no, that really is. I call him a. lot. >> About what? >> Yeah. About what? >> Do I not call you? >> What's it about? >> You have called me, but about what? What. do you want to Why are you interested in. me? >> Um,

>> what are you, a girl? [laughter]. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Why do you like me, Bobby? >> Tell me why you like. >> Happy birthday. >> text. >> Oh, that was a text. Yeah. [laughter]. Yeah. Um, you mean What time is Bad. Friends? >> Yes. Yeah. What time is Bad Friend? >> Yeah. And then, >> but you have to read behind the context. of it. >> He's saying more than just what time. >> Yeah. Scramble the words. >> He forced me to say I love you in front. of his friends. >> Yeah. >> You should say I love you more. I mean, these are the things I'm talking about, dude. It's like there's more resistance. when it comes to you than me.

>> Cuz he has a lot of repression. Fancy. has a lot of repression. >> Yeah. Repressed feelings, you know. >> He gets really uncomfortable. >> And then when he got drunk, he got. really touchy feely with me. >> Yeah. >> Did you not? >> Mhm. >> And that's when your real self comes. Well, the defense goes down. >> Yeah. >> And this is how I really feel. >> Well, I'll tell you, he wants to be a. star now cuz I pitched a little show. about me and him going to like a local. bar. >> To me, like showing him what a local. watering hole is like. >> Yeah. And literally the other day after. the episode, he's like, "Andrew, >> when when are we going to do this show. where you and I go to Dear?".

>> And whose name goes first? >> Whose name is on top? He literally he. wants to headline the show. >> Wow. >> And by the way, that only reminds me MCO. that breakfast. [laughter]. >> That reminds me. >> Yeah. >> This is the funniest part. I know that I. did that to you just to tease you, you. know, just to be like, "Oh, you pay this. time." But I also know that stayed with. you for a while. [laughter]. >> You've been thinking about it. >> Yeah. How much was it? No, I was like, "No." How much was it? >> Like $30. >> No, it wasn't much. But I was also It's. way more than I would have spent on. breakfast, but I was like, "It's this is.

good." [laughter]. >> Can you talk to the mic? >> I was also like, "This is a good this is. a good thing.". >> Why is it a good thing? >> Because I cuz I get so much. It's nice. to pay some back. >> Oh, I see. >> Cuz he walks around like this all day. >> I know. >> Have I not given you cash before? >> Yeah, you constantly give me. >> Yeah, but you can't get me a breakfast. >> I If you want to go out for breakfast. Yeah, sure. >> He does not want to go out for. breakfast. actually texted me the other day out of. the blue. >> What' it say? >> He said, "Uh, Marty Supreme is a film of. two halves.". >> That's true. >> Yeah, >> that's actually a very true statement.

>> What? >> This is the New York Times. [laughter]. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> He's a critic. >> No, I I mean, I watched the I watched. the I mean, can I have not my own. opinion about the movie? >> It is a film of two. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I I I thought that the. first half of the movie, right, was like. [clears throat] brilliant. It was. >> I thought the setup was good and then I. think it just ran away from itself. It. became something else like there was a. lot editing that needed to be go on or. whatever. >> Like get to the thing. >> There was a lot of other movies.

>> other movies in there and it just I I. got lost in it and you know at the end. of the day good movie but you know I. mean it doesn't deserve any awards in my. opinion. Shopify. >> You know, we have an online business. here at Bad Friends and we would not be. nothing without Shopify. Okay. >> That is exactly true. >> You like designing? >> I do. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's what they do. >> Yes. They help you. Shop Design Studio. Yes. It's one of the best out there. You. know, you you you seem like you got a. huge marketing team. You can easily. create email and social media campaigns.

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>> Yeah. >> What? >> I don't know. >> Testosterone. >> a little bit. >> I was born with none. No, that's. impossible. But it does get harder. >> Guess what? And guess what? With Mars. men, >> testosterone, >> you get a big boost from Mars men. This. is natural testosterone support. It's. phenomenal. Uh this stuff, a lot of. people think like, you know, having a. dad bod comes from drinking beer, eating. worse. For a lot of guys, that's not. actually the whole story. As we all get. older, men, our bodies are going to. reprogram themselves. We're going to. store more fat. >> And there's no there's no weird. stimulants or synthetic hormone. It's. real natural ingredients like ton car,

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>> He gave him his Oscar and he carried it. in like a Jan Sport backpack. >> Yeah, that's amazing. >> Bubble wrapped. I thought that was like. the funniest. It's funny to take. something that so many people cherish. dear and throw it in like a trapper. keeper and give it to a [ __ ] Look at. that. >> Show the video of him pulling out of a. backpack. It's hilar. >> It's like FIFA giving a um FIFA Nobel. Peace Prize to [ __ ] Trump. [laughter]. >> Remember that? >> Yeah. some makebelieve thing that they. [clears throat] have never done before. [laughter]. Sean Penn has a that there's a vibe.

about him that I kind of believe. >> Yeah, >> I believe everything he is. I think he. is extremely him. I don't think. >> Yeah. I I I I I don't think that during. um hurricane um Katrina. >> when he was diving into New Orleans and. trying to save people was. >> he loves that [ __ ]. >> I think he was really trying to save. lives. >> I think he loves that [ __ ]. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're saying it's not. performative with him? >> I don't think it's performative with. him. You know what I mean? I think it's. just there's something's wrong. [laughter]. >> That's not wrong, but there's like. there's there's like a. >> Yeah. >> You know what I mean?

>> An eccentric, >> you know, personality disorder. >> 100%. >> Yeah. Where it's like he really believe. he went out there doesn't care about the. leeches and saving lives. >> He gave the [ __ ] president of Ukraine. his own. Yeah. I mean, doesn't he have. one already? >> Yes. Two. >> Two. >> Yeah. So, where are we going to put it? next to the other one. >> I know, but it's like, >> you know, >> you you would never my Oscar, >> you know what my Oscar would be? >> Well, your Oscar is more like a. >> Ask me where my Oscar is.

>> That is a good joke. >> Yeah, go ahead. >> I said your Oscar is more like a Juan. You'll never get an Oscar. [laughter]. You'll get a Julio before you get an. Oscar. >> Oh, that's mean. >> It's not true, though. >> That's mean. >> You're never going to win a [ __ ]. Oscar. Are you out of your mind? >> I I I was just trying to make a. hypothetical game about like I was just. having fun. I'm just digging you in. >> Yeah, but you know, >> give me your Oscar speech if you did. win. We shouldn't do Oscar jokes. This. is so [ __ ] long ago. The Oscars. >> But yours would be at the front door.

with lights. Yeah. >> Music every time. >> Right. As you open the door, it's like. [laughter]. and Bobb's like, >> "No, I would have a gigantic Oscar. holding the Oscar.". >> Yes. Yeah. Yeah. >> That's actually awesome. >> Yeah. Yeah. [laughter]. >> That would And lights. Oh, no. Yeah. Yeah. But don't forget the gigantic. Oscar. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> You ever walk into somebody's house? [clears throat] You ever walk into. somebody's house and they've got like.

Emmys plural, you know, and you're like, >> "How did you get a [ __ ] Emmy?". >> I know. Yeah. Yeah. >> Like you'll go to somebody's house who's. like someone you know in the business. and you're like, "You got a [ __ ]. Emmy?". >> Yeah. >> And they're like, "Yeah, we got three of. them. We did this outstanding. non-scripted blah blah blah thing, daytime Emmy." And you're like, >> they they give too many though. >> I know. But. >> but I I saw I went to a guy's house and. like it was like on the bottom like. there was a bunch of books. >> It was just the corner of a room. I go, "What's that?" He goes, "It's an Emmy.". >> That's crazy.

>> And I go, I would have Emmy on top of an. Emmy [laughter]. >> inside of another Emmy. >> Inside of another Emmy. You You know. what it' be like? One of those Russian. dolls where you [laughter]. mean there'd be so many Emmys within. Emmys. You know what I mean? Like, but. he just put it right in the corner of. this like, you know, I mean, >> discreet, just doesn't care about it. Rusting. I think that's cool. I think. that's what I would do. How funny if it. if I did get nominated for something. >> I We would Well, I'd quit the show. [laughter].

>> It would It would validate all my hate. for the business. >> Oh, yeah. Yeah. [laughter]. >> Really? >> Well, it's all [ __ ]. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That would be. definitely. >> my friend Academy Award nominated. >> Well, I'll tell you why I won't. Even if. I do a good job at a movie, the reason. why I won't is because I can't do the. thing that you need to do, >> which is. >> which is go and shake hands and you know. what I mean? >> You're so good at that. >> No, I'm not. >> You are very. >> I don't show up to those things, >> but for this you would.

>> Oh, you think you got to you got to go. to Paris and meet so and so and you got. to do this and that. You think I would. do all those things? >> Yeah. Have you ever seen the movie Home. for Porum? >> No. >> It's one of the best. That's like one of. the uh it's called uh That's not a. mighty wind, is it? No, for your. consideration. Sorry. >> For your consideration. >> Yeah. >> This shitty little movie called Home for. Porum. Uh it's a movie inside of a movie. and the cast thinks it's a shitterter. and then it gets um Oscar buzz that they. might actually win. So then they all. change. They all they dynamically all. change. Yeah.

>> They become like so full of themselves. and they all become the fakest version. of who they used to be. >> Oh, that's cool. >> Oh, it's brilliant. It's. >> Oh, wow. >> That's a um uh. >> Yeah. >> What's his name movie? What's wrong with. Christopher Guest? >> Christopher Guest movie. Yeah, >> it really is. >> Yeah. >> Oh, wow. Look at the cast, by the way. >> Yeah. >> Did we kill yet another celebrity? >> Yeah, >> we did. Dude, we got to stop talking about. famous people. We killed Chuck Norris. >> No, we didn't kill Chuck. >> Yes, we did. Hey, >> he was 70. What? 81 years old. >> No, he was only 68 or 69.

>> 86. >> 86. Okay. He was [laughter]. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think. that if they're above 75, we didn't kill. them. >> Yeah. How about 80? If they're above 80. >> Okay. above 80. I think he was on his. way. >> 86 is a good good run. Oh, >> yeah. That's a really good run. >> But you know, Hawaii is where I want to. die. >> Yeah, you've talked about this. Yeah. Yeah. Why? Why? >> Cuz I saw Rahm Doss die there. >> You I mean, and when it was the last. video, it was weird cuz this is when.

they had um when I first got um what do. you call that? The um Ox Oculus. >> Yeah. >> Right. And then there was like a thing. where you could press and see ROM DOSs. >> Oh, wow. >> Right. Right. And so then, you know, I. mean, you go boop, Ram Das, right? >> And he's like a thousand, he looks like. a thousand years old. And he's in Hawaii. >> and he's going, you know what I mean? >> Yeah. It's just a process. Yeah. You. mean [snorts] you know what he's. talking, you know? You [laughter] know. what I mean? It's a it's a witness to. realism. Yeah. Whatever he's talking.

about, right? >> And you could zoom around his body, see. all his liver spots and stuff. But then. like Yeah. But then I was like, um, it. was definitely in Hawaii, right? And I'm. like, "Oh, this is where you pass.". >> You want to die in Hawaii. >> I think so. In a beautiful day in Hawaii. with the palm trees, beautiful day, and. just sitting there, you know, I mean, maybe on an Oculus. See me die on an. Oculus [clears throat] or something. You. know what I mean? >> But like 3D. I want people to see me die. in 3D. >> Sign up for Bad Friends Patreon. We will. be.

>> We'll be doing a viewing party of. Bobby's death. Uh, and you can live. >> Would you do a vlog. >> as I die? >> Yeah. Why? >> Until you can't talk. Oh my god. >> As I lay dying. Yeah. Yeah. >> That's so dark. >> Yeah. But I I would pod until I can't. talk. >> You'd be doing a a death pod. >> Yeah. Do a death pod. >> There is a guy that does it. The guy. that got diagnosed with like stage four. something cancer and he's doing like a. pod until he dies. >> Yeah. >> There's like a guy that was there was an. artist that was doing this. >> Would you do it? >> No. Cuz it would be Let me tell you. something. If I do.

>> I would do it with you. >> But if I have terminal cancer, I'm. telling you guys now in this room, none. none of you will ever know. >> Oh, you would know e either if I had it. >> Yeah. I wouldn't tell anybody. I would. do what's his name did. >> Norm. >> Huh? >> Norm. >> Norm. But I was thinking about what's. that that beautiful actor. Uh. >> oh. Chadwick. >> Chadwick Boseman. It didn't tell a soul. >> Yeah. >> Why do Why? >> I Because you don't want to You don't. want people to treat you differently as. you die. >> You don't want the pity. >> You just don't want someone to treat you. different because you're die when you're. dying. People are going to talk to you. like a baby because they know you're. safe. >> Are you okay?

>> What? How was today? >> How was today? >> Yeah. You don't want any of that [ __ ]. Just treat me like you treat me and then. I'll die. >> Yeah. Please tell me though. I would. [laughter]. >> No, please tell. You have to tell me. >> Do you want me to tell you now? >> I I don't. >> like what stage like if it's stage two, would you tell me? >> How funny. I'm literally like withering. away and and Bob's like, "Are you okay?". I'm on the pod. I'm just like, "I'm. totally fine.". >> Yeah. Yeah. >> I'm dying live on the pod. >> Yeah. >> No, I wouldn't tell anybody. I really. actually. >> You even me [snorts]. >> I think just me and the old lady would.

know and I wouldn't tell anybody else. >> And then one day I show up and you're. not here. >> It's kind of beautiful, isn't it? No, it's not. >> It's like Goodwill Hunting. >> Yeah. Then I gota. >> Yes. >> Then I gotta call Theo. You want to. start one? [laughter]. >> Yeah, dude. >> Yeah, >> I would. BUT I'M BUSY. >> WHAT WOULD I DO? I MEAN, it's over. >> Yeah, >> it would be over. >> Well, I won't die. >> Don't die with that. >> All right. All right. Knock on wood. >> All right. Knock on with me either, dude. For at least another five. >> Five? Yeah. Yeah.

>> Give me more than five. >> Yeah. No, we need five more years. >> The couple next to me said that today. They said it was I was eating at the the. Chinese joint before I left and the guy. was like. >> just kind of started drummed up. conversation. Nice guy had the casino. I. said, "You guys out here in Vegas doing. something special." He's like, "It's our. anniversary.". >> It's awesome. I was like, "Yeah, my. in-laws are going to, you know, about to. do their 50th." And she goes, "Gh, God, we'll never make it there." And the. husband was like, "What do you mean? What? What? You're going to leave me?". And she's like, "No, I'll be dead. In 20. years, I'll be dead.".

>> Oh my god. >> It was their 30th. And I was like, "No, you won't be dead." And she's like, "I. hope so." I was like, "God damn.". >> It was It made me sad. I was like, "No, don't say that. >> What's coming for all of us?". >> I know, but I don't want to think about. it. >> Yeah. >> I think about it sometime. >> That's why I quit smoking. >> Yeah. >> To give give myself a shot. >> Get death away from the door. >> Yeah. >> Get him to go away. And now we're going. to start exercising. >> I have been. [snorts]. >> Go on. [laughter]. Well, I mean,

>> I have. >> Yeah, go on. >> I believe you. >> I mean, I've been I've been trying to. >> You mean do setups? >> I Can I tell you something? Yeah. And. this is not an insult. >> Yeah. >> But your stomach kind of looks like. after someone gets surgery and they have. all that extra skin left over cuz you've. lost so much weight. >> I know. >> You got to just get that ripped off. >> No, I don't think I have I don't have. that kind of extra skin. You do? >> I can sit up. You You think so? >> Let's do a tummy tuck for you. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I think I have extra. skin. >> Let me see it again. >> What?

>> He's going to gain the weight back, though. >> Okay, but don't Okay, stop sucking in. Just now. Relax. Relax your body. >> Relax your back. >> I am. >> Relax. >> I am. >> Yeah. >> This. >> It's crazy how skinny you are. >> But this. >> Yeah. >> But I've been doing a lot of sit-ups. >> Have you? >> Yeah. I do like a thousand a day. >> Really? You do a thousand a day? >> Yeah, I try to do a thousand a day. >> Try to Okay. [snorts]. >> How many do you actually do? >> Six. >> No, I know. No, I'm not not kidding you. I do it like uh when I wake up, I I do. it like 150.

>> and then during the day I'll just keep. doing it. [laughter]. >> He just goes to the kitchen for ice. cream. [laughter]. >> Yes, I do. >> Show me a sit up right now. 150. >> No, not in a row. [laughter]. >> Not in a row. >> What do you mean? You said I do I do. like 150? >> Yeah. So, I'll do like 25. >> Yeah. >> Stop. Right. Look out the window. >> Right. Watch Neighbors on HBO. Right.

>> And then I'll go, you gota do another. 25. So I'll do another 25. Right. Stop. But I'll make sure I get to 150 in the. morning. >> in the [ __ ] you do 150. >> Yeah. Yeah. I I mean I just started a. week after I quit smoking. >> Can I see how you do your form? >> That's a week after you quit smoking. >> Please let me see your form. >> No. >> I just want to see how you do it. >> No, >> I can't do it. No, because you you're. going to tease me and it's going to be. mockery and I don't want I don't want to. do that because it's going to dis what. it's going to do is going to make me go, "Oh, don't do them anymore because it's. mockery.".

>> Of course, I'm going to tease you. >> THAT'S WHY I'M NOT DOING IT RIGHT NOW, DUDE. >> YEAH, but I'm I'm doing it I'm going to. do it for a year and see what happens. >> I'm so proud of you. >> You'll be ripped if you really do it. If. you. >> I am do I really am doing it. >> like this? >> I'm obsessed with it. Yeah. >> Do you brace your legs with something to. like cuz you need weight on your feet? >> Yeah. So I hook my legs on my um. cabinet. >> You do? >> Yeah. Yeah. Like this. And I get cramps. on my feet. >> Well, you drink water. >> Yeah. And I And I And I try to hold this. too. So the pain is there.

>> Wow. >> Yeah. And right now it does hurt all of. it. >> That's good. >> Good pain. >> It's all this pain down here. >> You put a mat down or you doing it on. >> I I just do hard ground. You know what I. call it? I'm doing old boy. >> Doing old boy. >> When you stuck in that room for 15. years, right? So I'm only gonna do. push-ups. Mhm. >> I'm only going to do push-ups and. sit-ups and just see what that does. >> Like jail. >> Yeah. Like like prison. >> Well, street street workouts. You seen. those guys that only work out? Like they. just do pull-ups on street lights? Have. you seen how jacked these guys are? They. go to a jungle gym. These guys are.

street workouts out that that that those. two black guys. >> Uh I've seen these guys. They don't do. anything but push-ups, sit-ups, pull-ups, squats. Like this is all. >> Yeah. >> from practical [ __ ] outside. >> Practical [ __ ] outside. >> No weights. >> Yeah. Also, it's like I went to that. [ __ ] place. What's that gym next to. my house? >> Equinox. >> No. >> Planet Fitness. >> So, I walked in there and I go, "Um, I. want to join.". >> No, you didn't. >> I swear to God on my my mother's life. >> Wow. >> And I went in there and I go, "I want to.

join." They go, "We want to we need to. link you get your bank account. >> We don't do credit card membership.". >> And I'm like, "What? I don't know how to. do that." And I just left. [laughter]. I go, "Fuck you. I'm leaving." Right. I. really was going to join Planet Fitness. >> You fitness would be so funny. >> It was right by my house. Right by my. house. Right. >> You're never going to get anything done. People are going to bother you all day. >> No. No. I No. No. I Dude, I I put a mask.

on everything. >> You do. >> Oh, yeah. Yeah. >> And they can't tell it's you. >> First of all, you have to cover your. eyes if you're going to cover anything. Not your [ __ ] mouth. >> A Batman mask. [laughter]. >> I'd like to work out. I came here to. work out. Bane better not be in the cold one. [laughter]. >> Yeah. So I went there and they said I. >> welcome to the steam room Batman. >> So I try to. >> Yeah. So then in my mind I'm like you. know and I don't want to go to Egyn cuz. that's where all the supermodels and all. the hot people go.

>> The hottest people. It's disgusting. >> That's why I'm like I'm just going to go. old boy style. >> and do sit-ups and push-ups. Now you. can't tell yet but maybe if I do it for. like a year. >> you're going to get jacked. [clears throat]. >> maybe. But do you remember what you said. to me in the car in Australia? >> What? >> You'll see. >> You'll see. >> You're You're going to see now. >> It's already been 2 years. >> I I I know. [laughter] I I know. But I. listen, I didn't do anything. >> until this week and a half. >> and I've been starting every day doing. it because I need a because I need a new. obsession.

>> You're bored, too? >> Cuz I'm smoking. I used to smoke, right? So, it's like instead of that, I have so. much anxiety. So, it's like I I have to. do it because if I don't then I get. entrenched in Iran. in Iran. >> Iran. >> Iran. >> Oh, >> yeah. [snorts]. >> I I didn't know what you were I thought. it was an app. I WAS LIKE, "WHAT? [laughter]. >> PUT me on to Iron.". >> No. No. Like the war. Like I get. obsessed with the war and stuff and. what's going on and stuff like that. You. know what I mean? And then I And I get. lost in it. It causes me more more. anxiety. So it's like now I'm, you know, I mean, old boying it.

>> You're old boy. >> Yeah. Yeah. Like or I call it the Travis. Pickle. >> You know what I mean? >> That more lines up society. This dirt. and the trash in the streets. You know. what I mean? >> It's incel talk. >> Yeah. Yeah. It's like Yeah. I talk to. myself. You know what I mean? It's. garbage. The human garbage. >> What? >> The [ __ ] and the [ __ ] and the dogs. >> Dogs. You know what I mean? You know. who's up there in that room? [laughter]. >> That's my wife. That's my wife. You know. who's up in that room? >> Not my apartment. >> Yeah. That's not my apartment. You know.

what I mean? It's a [laughter]. >> He's a shooter. What? You're a shooter? >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm about to. >> It's a little dangerous. >> Yeah. Yeah. I just got a rifle. >> Laser. [laughter]. >> Yeah, I'm traveling speckling it. >> No, please don't. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm like I have. like notes from the underground. thoughts. >> What does that mean? >> It's a Dostoyki book and it's about a. guy that's like living in a basement. >> and judging society through like a. little opening. You know what I mean?

>> Yeah. >> You know what I mean? And I'm I do that. >> So scary. >> That's such a scary thing to think. about. No, I do it. >> Judging from a window sill in a. basement. >> Yeah. [laughter]. >> Oh, yeah. >> Just piss jars everywhere. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Fap all over the place. >> Yeah. Yeah. I'm JD Salinger. >> One would think. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. You were You were very salient. >> Yeah. Yeah. Salian did. >> If I was an author, which author would I. be? [laughter].

>> Never drinks water. >> He got calf cramps doing sit-ups. out. [laughter]. He's got to fix all that. [sighs]. >> Can I have another water, please? >> Yeah. >> D, you're parched, huh? >> Yeah. I'm so tired and um drained from. it. I mean, this week was crazy. >> Bad crazy. >> We did sack and then I flew straight to. Philly, you know. I mean, three days. there, one day in LA, then went to San. Jose. Today I flew back. You know what I mean?

I didn't sleep at all. It's like you're. on the pit. >> Slept all day. >> What the [ __ ] is going on? [laughter]. >> Like a [ __ ] camel. [snorts]. >> No, I love you. Need it. Huh? >> Yes. So, I'm I'm old boying it. >> You got to old boy it. >> Yeah. >> I think you're I I believe in you. I. believe in you. >> I mean, I'm never going to destroy you. I'll [snorts] never get physically, you. know, strong enough. You're just a. bigger weight class. >> Yeah. How's dating going? But I am. seeing somebody and what I've been doing.

is just looking at them and go, "Are we. done?" And then and she goes, "Are you. sure?" I I go, "Yeah, I mean, you did. it, right?" She goes, "Yeah, I got. there." And then I'll go, "I think I'm. done.". >> So you're just bailing. >> What do you mean? >> You're bailing out. You're not going to. try to finish the job. >> Well, I'll come like some excuse like we. did the job. You know what I mean? We. got rid of the You know what I mean? Most of their military [laughter]. >> Trump Very.

good. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, you. know, I need a I you know, it's called, you know, I mean, an exit strategy. >> Yeah. So, I use an exit strategy, you. know what I mean? When we're done, >> what is it? >> It's just like at one time, u what. happened was um [laughter]. you know, I mean, she was working so. hard and I just grabbed her arms and I. go, >> "No, you shook it off.". >> Yeah. And I shook it off and she goes, "Are you sure?" I go, "Yeah." like a. pitcher to a catcher just [laughter].

shaking off the signs. I don't want. that. >> But the but but is it worth it? I don't. know. >> Well, if you're happier. >> Yeah, I'm happier. It's also But you. here's what's the great thing about it. though is is that um. >> Am I boring everybody? >> No. It's interesting. >> Are you sure? >> Yeah. >> I feel like being boring today. >> We're listening. >> Is that what it is? >> Yeah. People are quiet when you're. talking because they're listening. >> Okay. But what it is is um what helped. it. I'm kidding. >> Are you real? >> It was a bit. It was a bit cuz you just.

asked. >> But go ahead. >> The cookies are good. >> Come on. I'm serious. >> Okay. [laughter]. >> It was a bit. You just said something. >> I just didn't have the motivation or you. know what I mean? It's really weird. >> That's healthy. >> Couldn't do it. >> She was like hugging. I was hugging her. and I got kind of half hard. [snorts]. You know how you get half. >> I know that. >> Yeah. You know that feeling, right? Yeah. Yeah. It's like midway point. >> Oh yeah. No turning back. >> Yeah. Yeah. It's like neutral like. India. >> [laughter].

>> Yeah. Too much roar, right? Too much. Too much war. But using reference. >> too much. [laughter]. >> Way too much. >> Switzerland is. >> what? Switzerland. Yeah. I'm being very. neutral. You know what I mean? But it's. like another thing that I realized is. that um a new game came out that I've. been anticipating for 6 months and I. haven't played one single bit of it. >> What is the game? >> It's called Crimson Desert. >> Alexa Pro. >> Yeah, I think it's Alexa Pro because. it's like I it's downloaded. You know. what I mean? I turned it on and I saw. the character walk toward I got him to.

walk toward like a cabin [laughter]. >> and you got midpoint. >> I got I got midpoint. >> Yeah. >> I couldn't even reach the cabin. >> You got neutral. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> You got sweet. >> and my character stopped and I was like. I just turned it off. >> What? >> Yeah. And then I just did 25 sit-ups. >> We got to get Oh, that's good. [laughter]. >> Use some more drive for life. >> No, it it's it's like I don't know. It's. weird. It's like um because I I play I. use video games to like not think about. my life and not think about my anxiety.

and stuff but I don't have as much. right. So it's like I have no interest. in. >> escapist. >> escapism you know what I mean in that. way. >> No. >> Yeah. So but it the the only downside is. you know I mean the climaxing and the. orgasm. >> No coming is a big that's a bummer. >> It's a big one. Yeah. >> You need to talk to your therapist. This. isn't therapy dude. >> Is there a spider on your shirt? It's a hole on the on the sleeve. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Well, you you. >> It wouldn't scare me. >> A spider. [laughter].

>> It just look like one. >> I know, but it's like I felt like you. were trying to scare me. >> No. [laughter]. >> Yeah. Yeah. I I think that a scorpion. maybe. >> Is that a scorpion on your shirt? >> That' be Whoa. Oh, >> you know what I mean? But the spider was. like I don't know. >> Unless it was like um you know um what's. it called? The the brown one. >> Brown recluse. >> The brown recluse. If it was a brown. recluse, I would be scared a little bit. They're in California. >> Yeah. Yeah. A black widow probably. >> scared. >> But a standard spider I don't think I'm. scared of. >> You think that's disrespectful to them? You that they're called standard. spiders. You know, like when they're.

crawling up with your wall and they're. trying to be tough and you go, "Oh, look. A little standard spider.". >> Brown recluse. That's so offensive. >> A brown recluse. >> They're brown. >> Yeah. >> You know what I mean? >> How did they get into this country? Is. my real. >> is Yeah. Exact. Exactly. >> These are your papers. [laughter]. >> Um, >> by the way, brown recluse. Black Widow. Notice the theme. >> Yeah. >> All right. There's no white one. That's. Is this. >> In fact, there's no white spiders. >> Yeah, there is. >> Genocide. >> right there.

>> Oh, there's one. >> Yeah, there's white. >> Yeah. Would you be scared with that one? >> Yeah. >> No, it looks It looks nice and safe. >> Yeah. It's like, "Hello, neighbor.". >> White spiders. >> Okie dokie. >> White spiders asked to come in your. house. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Hey, may I come in? >> Yeah. >> Come on in. >> Do you have some spare bear spare. butter? >> White spiders in Arizona. That's really. Those are cool looking. >> Yeah, but there's some black in it. Obama style. >> Can I have another water, please? >> Unbelievable. I love this hydration. Do.

you know why all the IV IV girls are. hot? >> I know it. I figured it out. Why are. they all hot? >> How did you figure it out? >> Because I got them a bunch of times when. I'm on the road and it and this helped. me figure it out. >> Because they're [ __ ] Because they. don't. >> Oh, here we go. >> They don't work. and they send a hot. girl to distract you from the fact that. it doesn't [ __ ] actually do [ __ ] You. piss it out five seconds later, it. didn't do anything. It's placebo. And. here's how I know that's true. Half of. these women that are administering these. things, I don't even believe they're. nurses. These are just [ __ ] chicks.

who got It's like an agency hired them. I don't think that any of it's real. >> That's okay if they're hot, though. >> I don't want someone stabbing me in the. [ __ ] arm with a needle in a bag. >> So, you you'll never get an IV again. >> I think they're [ __ ]. >> I get them all every week. >> And is it working? It is working. >> on what? >> My sit-ups. [laughter]. >> Touche. >> Touche. >> All right. My my sit-ups and my mind. >> They're overpriced and they're fake. I. know that they're fake. There's vitamins. in those bags, but you're. >> Then why is your pee right a different.

color? >> You You answered my what? You literally. validating what I'm saying. You piss it. right out. >> Yeah, but it's the vitamins and all the. good stuff that's going through your. body. >> Almost nothing gets absorbed. You can. talk to any doctor. They'll tell you. your body. >> it goes to your veins, guy. It doesn't. absorb. You piss it right out. If. >> my veins absorb. >> Let me see your veins. >> Those did absorb. >> Yeah. Yeah. They're absorbing the veins, dude. You might You got to get your. veins checked. >> Every doctor I know says it's a [ __ ]. scam. That is [ __ ] And they're. overpriced. And they go, "You'll retain. such a small percentage of those.

vitamins. You might as well just take a. handful of [ __ ] vitamins at home. Easier than getting a drip for 40. minutes because you want a hot chick in. your living room.". >> All right. All right. So, what? [laughter]. >> That's what it is. >> It's cool. >> I'm see No, >> it's a scam. It's not a scam. >> It's a [ __ ] scam. >> No, because then they add extra. Do you. want extra? >> Oh, that doesn't sound like a scam at. all. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. [laughter]. >> Do you want extra something? >> It's like extra hot sauce at [ __ ]. Taco Bell. >> Yeah. Put it in the [ __ ] bag. >> Which one? Diablo. >> Fire. Fire. Fire.

>> Diablo. >> Here's why I don't like No. Here's why I. don't like Diablo. >> Changes the flavor profile of of Taco. Bell. Fire is. >> just hot enough. And I buy it at the. store. It's on sale right now at Bonds. >> It's in my fridge. >> Yeah. >> I have four bottles. I Oh, I got six. bottles of Arvar. >> I have nine bottles [laughter] of shoe. leather. >> Arvar. >> You know Arvar? >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Great hot sauce. >> Nine bottles of it. >> Yeah. I ordered it on shop. >> On my phone. >> On Shop. >> It's called [laughter] Shop on my phone. >> Is it like Amazon shop?

>> I don't know what it is, but Yeah. The. reason why I don't use Amazon anymore. because all my deliveries go to this. girl I used to hit on in Phoenix. >> cuz she was sick one time. you and you. forget to do the [laughter]. >> Yeah, I forgot to do the address. So, she she texted me last week. She I got. 12 bottles of Arvark [laughter]. >> and I go, "Oh, fuck." And I finally. figured out how to change the address. You know what I mean? >> Enjoy the Arvark, though. Yeah. I mean, what a gift. >> Arvark's great. >> She goes, "I got $12." You're like, "Thinking of you.". >> Yeah. [laughter] And then here's what I.

also have been doing lately and I don't. know if you know this this is a good. thing but um you ever go you ever go to. the farmers market. >> every day? >> No. [laughter]. You going to [ __ ] walk around the. [ __ ] farmers market and see like a. like four By the way, it's three of the. bins are the same thing. It's like oh is. this lettuce again from this guy? A. different guy. It's a honey guy. Four. lettuce stands. Two egg ladies. >> OH MY GOD. [screaming] WHAT ARE YOU. TALKING ABOUT? >> AND HOW MANY CANDLES?

>> THERE'S A STICKER SHOP. >> ALL RIGHT. THERE'S A NUT SHOP. >> OH, >> ALL RIGHT. I'm not going there for. lettuce, guy. >> It's a scam. >> It's not a scam. >> Farmers markets are the IV of groceries. >> No, it's a Let me tell you something. about [ __ ] the farmers market. Which. farmers market are you talking about? I'm Third Street. >> Third Street? >> Yeah, the um. >> the farmers market. >> The that farmers market. >> No, the the growth and farmers market. that brother, we're talking about. farmers market. I'm talking about the. Third Street Farmers Market. >> Well, all of us thought the other thing. >> Oh, you did?

>> Yes. >> You're talking. >> You You got me on Third Street. What. about you, M? >> No, I thought you meant a real farmer. >> A farmers market. >> Oh, so the farmers market on Thursday is. not a real farmers market. >> The mall. >> WHAT IS IT CALLED? >> THE MALL. IT'S THE GROVE. >> IT'S CALLED THE GROVE. >> NO, IT'S CALLED THE FARMERS MARKET. >> YES. THAT'S THE NAME OF IT. BUT IT'S. CALLED NO ONE CALLS IT THAT. >> NOBODY CALLS THAT. >> OH, SO IN BIG LETTERS IT SAYS THE. FARMERS MARKET, BUT NO ONE CALLS IT. THAT. NO. >> FIRST of all, nobody go Nobody goes. there. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Hey, Pepsi. No one calls that. It's.

brown juice. [laughter]. >> WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? >> It is brown juice. >> Call it a farmer's market. BUT IT'S. >> LOOK AT IT'S ON A [ __ ] WHAT? TEMPLE. What do you call that? >> A farmers market. A farmers market that. we're referring to is a thing that's. come and go. This is a permanent far. It's permanent. >> All right. So, next time we'll say. permanent farmers market. >> Well, say say you know the farmers. market at the grove. That's what. everybody says. I'll do I'll say that. from now. >> Am I right? Am I [ __ ] right? Everyone. goes, "Oh, the farmers market." I GO, "THAT'S A [ __ ] FARMERS MARKET.

There's nine people making candles, six. people selling lettuce, and one [ __ ]. selling eggs. It's the [ __ ] worst. They're They're dog shit." Look at that. Oranges. Don't need them. Don't need. them. [laughter]. But. >> can I finish? >> Listen. >> Can I finish my farmers market? >> The farmers market at the Grove. >> Phenomenal. >> Sticker shop. No, it's phenomenal. >> Yeah, but there's all kinds of. >> But it's a [ __ ] mall. It's a mall. with permanent restaurants. >> But you know, Can I just So there's a.

there's a hot sauce. >> store there. Hot a hot a hot sauce bar. Yeah. >> That's not a bar. >> That's just a name. A hot sauce bar. >> Okay. [laughter] Okay. I'm sorry. I'm. being combative. >> I like it. >> Okay. So, there's a hot sauce place. there and then there's the I and I. always buy I don't know why. And I have. a [ __ ] cabinet filled. I go, where's. the hottest one? You want a true just to. have it. >> And I have it. Like I have the source. >> But you're not going to put it on. anything, are you? No. >> Just do you dip the finger? >> No. I have the one that's shaped like a. devil. I I have devil's blood. You know.

what I mean? Have you [laughter] devil's. blood? You know what I mean? I have um. the You know what I mean? The hottest. ones that you could buy. The most. expensive ones. >> Very cool. >> Yeah. Give me a devil's blood. Yeah. That one in the top. Yeah. That's Yeah. >> Satan's blood. >> Satan's blood. Yeah. Yeah. I have a. couple of bottles of blood. >> Hey, what's up? It's Mikey. Today we're. doing Satan's blood. [laughter]. So stupid. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But I just, you know, >> But you collect them cuz. >> I don't collect. I don't use them. I. have the source, too. The sources. Look.

at the sources bottle. Have we talked. about the source? >> No. >> The source hot sauce. Yeah. >> The source hot sauce. >> Look at the way it comes out. >> Oh, it's like. >> like a mind. >> It's like a book. >> Ancient. >> It's ancient. No, it comes in that and. then Yeah, it's like that. It It is so. hot. It's 7.1 million Scoville units. [laughter]. Rory Scoville rated this. 7.1 million Scoville. What is So, what. is the average Scoville units of like a.

bottle of Cholula? Give me that. >> Here's the kid again. >> Yeah. Hey guys, I'm trying the source. again. It's Mikey. [laughter]. >> Give me the Scoville units of a bottle. of Cholula. >> And I Let's guess cuz it's 7.1 million. for the source. I'm guessing regular. Cholula hot sauce is like. >> 500. >> Yeah. Yeah. I was just going to say a. thousand Scoville. A,000 and 2,000. I. was right on the money, baby. >> Of what? >> Scoville units. The heat units. That's. how they measure heat. >> And that's of what the hot sauce. >> Okay. So, just for like Cholula, regular.

table tabletop Cholula,00,000 to 2,000. The one you have is 7.1 million. >> Yeah. >> That's absurdest. >> I know. You got to try it. >> No, it's What do you You know, it's. going to fry your tongue. So, one time. me and Jordan Peele went to that hot. sauce place and we got the sores and we. took a [ __ ] toothpick. >> and your tongue. >> and we dipped a toothpick and we stuck. on our tongue and it was the most. painful thing. It was like alien blood. from the movie Alien. [laughter] You. could hear the sizzle. You know what I.

mean? It is so hot. >> Yeah. This guy's a card that says he. survived the hot sauce. >> Yeah. Yeah. It's a hot sauce. >> Oh, he just he just tried it once. >> Yeah, you get a card. >> You get a card. I don't have the card. We got to get you a card. >> You got to get you got a guard, too. Then. >> I'll go get a card with you. I'll go do. >> Would you try it? >> Yeah. It's just going to be [ __ ] an. annoying painful. >> It's going to ruin a part of your day. >> Yeah. >> We learned a lot. We learned that you're. going to be you're going to be getting a. six-pack. >> I at the very least get a two pack. Get. a two pack shakur [laughter] from doing. setups. I think you can.

>> I think you really can. If you're really. doing 150 a day. >> Yeah. >> No, just in the morning. >> In the morning. >> He said more. >> What are you doing in the afternoon? I. tried to do a thousand. >> Oh, >> I can you videotape it? >> No. >> Because I want proof. >> Well, I mean hopefully it'll show on my. body. >> I don't think it will. >> You don't think it will? >> I don't. >> You don't think sit-ups that m many. times? >> I think you count one and then you lay. there for 10 minutes and you think, "Oh, I did 200." [laughter].

>> You think I'm some sort of Asian math? >> Yes. >> You guys are tricky. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Well, I can't wait to see it. I want to. see the results. Well, maybe you won't. >> Maybe I won't. >> Yeah, maybe you won't. [laughter]. You know what I mean? Because it's. condescending and it's it's negative. AND. >> WE'RE NOT DOING A THOUSAND [ __ ]. SETUPS. >> IT'S DISRUPTIVE. It's disruptive. It's. not encouraging. You know what I mean? It's. >> discouraging. >> You're discouraging. >> No, I said I want you to prove that. you're doing it.

>> Yeah. It's um. dra draconian. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> It's draconian, >> is it? >> Yeah. Yeah. Harsh. >> It's harsh. Jirconian. >> Yeah. [laughter] Yeah. Yeah. Another learn another word I. learned through the Tik Toks. >> I was just going to say this is the war. The war. >> It's a war thing. [laughter]. >> Thank you for being a bad friend. >> It's a war. >> It's a war thing.

Woo. Woo! Yeah!