Bobbychella & The King's Fool | Ep 320 | Bad Friends

Hey, bad friends. I am going to be in. San Diego, Bobby's hometown, on June. 28th at the Sound in Delmare, North. County. Come on out, dude. Take a break. from the water and the sun, San Diego. Come see him at the sound. June 28th. Two shows, early show and a late show. June 28th. Then July 24th, I'm going to. be uh in St. Charles, Missouri. Basically St. Louis, right next door. Next door neighbors, come out and see me. at the Merit Star Casino. St. Charles, St. Louis, Missouri. That's July 24th. June 28th in San Diego. Come out and see.

me. Go to andrewantino.com for those. tickets. Andrewsantino.com. >> You two are bad friends. >> Who are these two idiots? >> A white dude and an Asian dude. You two. are disgusting. >> You two are something. >> We're bad friends. Pey. white. >> Average white. Normal white guy. Normal white guy.

[singing] Normal white guy, >> right? [clears throat]. >> Yeah. I like it. >> Yeah. You like it? >> Look who's back. >> You're still buying beef at the store? >> Oh, beef. >> 20% up. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Oh, yeah. >> You eating the beef, huh? >> I'm eating the beef. >> Yeah. Yeah. What else? What about gas? >> Gas on the lowest grade gas. >> You get the low grain. >> Yeah. >> I get supreme anyway. >> That's just with That's gas with. tomatoes and sour cream. >> Exactly. >> They're working. It's like a baked. potato. >> Yeah. >> Have you gotten colonoscopy? >> I have it.

>> Yeah. I just got mine. >> last week. Let's bring up the results. >> No, I can just tell you the results. >> It was awesome. The phone call made me. happy. Yeah. >> Zero polyps. Zero. >> No polyps. No cancer. They did find a. fingernail. [laughter]. Apparently my ass was like a well from. the silence of the lamb. [laughter]. Things are crawling out of it. You know. what I mean? I think my poop has claws. cuz it was just crawling out. >> Something's got to be. >> Yeah, they found a fingernail. Yeah. Yeah. And a little bit of AIDS. But um. [laughter] you can't put that in there.

>> They tested it. It's pure. >> Does [laughter]. this back from Coachella? Bobby Lee and. Carlos Herrera went out to the desert. They were at Coachella. They were. ripping it up, dude. TMZ reported on it. >> Well, rip ripping it up is um I'll tell. you what happened. And I may may I show. may may I show you my Coachella. experience? I never been before. >> That's why I introed it. >> He was showing off his wristband. >> Yeah, I was showing off hot shot with. the new wristband. >> Yeah. It's kind of like rude. >> Start it over. Go ahead. Go ahead.

No, [laughter]. >> they tag you now. >> Yeah. Yeah. You're an. >> Yeah. Arrogant [laughter]. >> What section of coach? You're missing an. A. >> Hey, what's up, dude? What section are. you in? >> Yeah. >> Oh, sick dog. I'm a douchebag. >> Yeah, that's artist. [laughter]. >> That's artist. >> So, whose artist pass was it? >> Mine. >> What artist gave you an artist pass? >> Well, I I'll be honest with you. We we. we we know a guy, you know. Should we.

say his name? >> Yeah. >> And he's a pure white. Um he's a um what. I like how they call a forever white. >> like me. >> Yeah. You're forever white. Like you. guys are the good ones, >> right? >> You mean Pete, I think I would put you. in that category. >> What about McCone? >> Yeah. Not really [laughter]. >> cuz he he can turn on a dime. Yeah. And. his allegiances I don't know whose. allegiances is too. >> He that he he is such a fence sitter. We. don't know where. >> We don't know where he is, dude. Yeah. Yeah. He's sort of like Pakistan,

>> right? >> Right. Who we're going to negotiate. >> We're we're doing the negotiations. Right. Yeah. But what what's really. going on here? Pakistan is great. [laughter]. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But so we um. he really hooked us up. This guy Cole, he's such a nice guy. I hugged him a. thousand times. I was so grateful that, you know, I mean, we were able to go. >> and um. >> who's the gentleman you're referring to? >> Cole. He's the director. He's the. director of the whole festival. Yeah.

Yeah. Really cool guy. Um. >> um he looked after us and um we the only. show I saw I I saw two shows. No, you. saw three. You were miserable at one. >> I barely saw one. >> Oh, who was the third? >> Oh, so the f the first I say two. Sabrina Carpenter. Let me tell you about. Sabrina Carpenter. >> Fill me in. >> Okay, I will. Um, she's um a good. performer. >> Mhm. >> Pretty. >> Mhm. >> Uh, she gave it her all. >> Mhm. >> Uh-huh. Um, I had rather been in an ICE.

detention center. [laughter]. I'd rather been in a Japanese inter. camp. Um, it was pure painful until, that's me, until Grandadonna came out. And when Grandma Madonna came out, I was. so excited. >> Grandma Madonna. >> Grand Madonna. Madonna came out. But the. Graham version. >> Oh, yeah. [laughter]. >> Old Madonna. >> Yeah. >> Grandma Madonna. >> Yeah. Grandma Madonna. >> Yeah. Grandma. Grandmama Madonna.

>> Yeah. Grandma Madonna. >> Grandma Mad. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> And she did Vogue. And when you know. what I mean? >> Come on. Vogue. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Let your body move with the music. >> She's a strike a pose. And when she. strike a pose, she had her. walking [laughter]. her walker. >> Yeah. Her walker. >> It was incredible. >> Well, strike a pose. You know what I. mean? And she was doing that, right? She. was doing a lot of leaning against, you. know what I mean? Objects. >> I heard Madonna's tour bus pulled up. into the handicap parking spot. [laughter].

>> Yeah. Yeah. >> Wait a minute. >> But she was incredible. >> Was she a surprise guest? >> Yeah, we heard. So, you know, I'm. watching us. I I Here's another weird. thing is when you've never heard of the. music. >> Uhhuh. >> I had I I kept calling what? Karen. Carpenter. >> Oh, yeah. >> Yeah. Because I did I kept messing up. [laughter] I kept messing up the names. >> Karen Carpenter. >> Karen Carpenter is a good performer is. what I Look at Look at the set, right? >> She was good. Karen Carpenter. >> Yeah. Karen Carpenter was so good. >> Great musician. >> You barely see her. She's so skinny. >> So, this is this is Sabrina Carpenter. >> Sabrina Carpenter. She's killing it on.

stage. But when you haven't heard the. music before, like not a single Have you. heard of the music before? >> No, I didn't know anything. >> Yeah. Yeah. I kept calling to looking at. Carlos and the girls me Jules Issa are. going crazy like saying the words, you. know. Espresso. >> Oh, espresso. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's her song. >> Oh, yeah. >> Is it? >> How does it How does it go? >> I don't know. Espresso. >> Espresso. Espresso. >> Get me an espresso. Hey. Hey. Hey. Why. don't you get me an espresso? Let me do.

the lyrics and [laughter] see if I can. get. >> Yeah. Yeah. See if you can do it. >> Now he's thinking about me every night. Oh, isn't that sweet? I guess so. Say. you can't sleep, baby. I know. That's. me. Espresso, >> can you zoom it in? Maybe try me doing a. lyric here. >> Yeah, let's hear it. >> Move it up, down, left, right, on. Switch up like Nintendo. Say you can't. sleep, baby. I know that's me. espresso. [laughter]. >> I can't relate to desperation. My give a.

are on vacation. And I got this. one boy. He won't stop calling. When. they act this way, I know I got them. Wait a minute. Time out. [laughter]. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> I can't relate to desperation. My give a. are on vacation. Yeah. >> Clean. Yeah. >> And I got this one boy. He won't stop. calling. Yeah. >> When they act this way, you know I got. them. No. >> And I don't like that. >> I don't like it either. >> Too bad for your ex. Don't do it for. you. Walked in a dream came true for. you. soft skin and I perfumed it for. you. Yes, I know it for you. Yes, that. morning coffee brewed it for you. Yes,

that one touch brand I n it for you. Now. we think about me every night. Isn't. that sweet? Guess you can't sleep. You. know [laughter] that how that's how it. goes. That's not how it goes. >> That's not how it goes. No. Yeah. Yeah. It was much slower. [laughter]. >> Yeah. >> Well, it should have been faster. >> All if all the songs were faster, it'd. be like a 15-minute set. [laughter]. >> Oh, and you lied. I I turned to Carlos. I go, "How long is this?" He goes, "4. minutes. >> her set.". >> Yeah. And an hour. an hour and a half. in, I looked at him. I go, "You're a. lawyer." [laughter]. >> It's cuz the strokes didn't play long. last week, so I assumed it would be the.

same amount of time. >> Yeah. So, um, but when Grandma Grandma. Madonna came out, um, it was exciting. cuz she did, uh, Vogue Just Like a. Prayer with uh, Karen Carpenter and it. was like, um, >> Just Like a Prayer is one of my favorite. songs. >> Yeah. Yeah. It's so It was like then I. got goosebumps. >> Right. >> Right. And I was like, "Oh, fuck." You. know, this is incredible. But then I. couldn't wait to get the out of. there. Well, it's too many people, man. >> Oh my. Well, in our area, >> you're in the VIP. Yeah. >> Yeah. He was by the trailers. Like Snoop.

Dog walked by him and he's just like. laying back getting recognized. >> Snoop walked by. Hi as a. >> Well, you're sitting next to a guy. He's. like, you know, talking for a while and. and I go, "What do you do?" He's like, "Oh, I'm in the Suicidal Tendencies.". >> Oh, really? >> Oh, yeah. Yeah. Like that. It was that. kind of vibe. You know what I mean? And. then, so then the strokes came on the. second night. >> Wow. >> And that was fun. >> They were They're good. They. >> They were good. And then I turned to. Jules, Issa, and this kid, Kua. >> They do not know who are [laughter]. >> Easter Island.

>> They have no idea what's going on. >> Well, they don't know the strokes, right? >> They don't know. And also, when when. Madonna came out, Issa goes, >> when who came out? >> Madonna came out. >> Who? >> Grandma came out. Yeah, Grandma. Issa. looked at Jules and goes, "Who is that?". >> Which is crazy. It's weird to be in this. like they're in a gap where that's too. old. Uh and the strokes are not as old. as Madonna but not their style of music. >> So they're missing these two. That's.

kind of wild. >> Also, when you're the oldest guy in the. whole place, >> it feels weird. >> No, you weren't. >> I know. I mean, you would see other But. they're working. >> It's like Rick Rubin and you. >> Yeah. Rick Rubin, me. There's a guy with. a camera that's like I mean, been doing. it for 40 years. >> You're you're in a class of your own. >> Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So then we Oh, so. we're sitting there the YouTube area. >> It's lightly uh lit. >> And then then we to the second level. above us was literally the Manson girls. >> You mean like Charles Manson's?

>> Yeah. Do you remember in Once Upon a. Time in Hollywood that girl that was. hitchhiking? >> Yeah. Margari. >> So there's three girls up there. They're. wearing no shoes. >> Wait, Margaret Quali was right. >> No, no, no, no. It wasn't Marggo. That's. amazing. >> No, that's not that. No, they were. wearing no shoes. They were like hippie. chicks at spawn ring. >> Yeah. AND THEY'RE JUST LIKE, "YEAH." OH, AND YOU Here's the most. >> That's cool, though. >> Here's the most or once I walked in, this is the most annoying. I knew I. wasn't going to have a good time. >> The lady at the um gate, she says to me,

"Watch this. This would annoy you.". >> Yeah. >> I'm going through and she goes, >> "Stay hydrated.". >> Oh, yeah. >> Like, I know what water is. [laughter]. Like I've been drinking water longer. than you. I know about electrolytes. I. know about the whole thing. >> To be fair. >> What? I don't look like I'm hydrated. >> You look quite dry. [laughter]. >> I do. >> No. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> You're a sober guy. She's speaking to. the drug addicts that are there. >> That place is filled with people on.

drugs and and drinking heavily. Yes. Most You know how many times how Google. how many people pass out or need medical. help at a Coachella weekend? I guarantee. you. >> I guarantee you it's in the hundreds of. people. >> because here's why. Every year something. bad go people have they pass out people. overdose. >> the weekend before a light bulb a. gigantic [snorts] light bulb this side. fell on a person's head. >> I heard about that. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> That's crazy. Look at this. What does. that say? 80 walking 21 am. Okay. 84.

>> amputes right here. So last year, a. hundred people had to get emergency. services because they're either too. high. Yeah. >> They're not drinking water, which is why. that woman is doing her job. >> Yeah. >> And if she's doing her job, it'll go. down again next year. >> It wasn't what she was saying. It's how. she said it. >> You didn't like her her vibe. >> Yeah. >> Drink water. Yeah. Like stay hyd. [laughter].

>> Yeah. You got to know. >> of like, you know what I I know how. water works. >> Yeah, lady. I know how water works. >> Yeah, I know how water You know how a. water works, right? >> Just found out. >> This stuff is fantastic. >> It's It's the best beverage on earth. >> The best beverage on earth. >> Yeah. Yeah. But. >> so so then you're backstage. The Manson. girls are there. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> This is a big group or did you guys. split up? Were you and Jules and Nissa. were they did everyone? >> At that point it was me, the girl I was. seeing and Carlos and behind us were. three Manson girls, you know what I. mean? with no shoes on and they're just,

>> you know, I mean, just doing things, >> vibing, dude. >> I like that. >> I know you liked it. That's when you. said the other thing. >> Oh, yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But they. were like, you know what I mean? >> Yeah. >> Yeah. And it's like like it's also I. know how much it costs to be there in. that area. >> Yeah. >> You know what I mean? And they, you. know, their feet are just dirt. >> But you didn't have to pay for that. area. They did. What you. >> So that's what I'm saying. It's like. here's um so I was in the artist area. and there was three blo from England. >> Hello mate. >> Hello Mike. Right. And I go you.

and I go yeah. And they're like I go. what do you guys do? You know what I. mean? We're investors. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. We're finance investors. >> Yeah. >> And and so you realize it's just all. rich people. >> Old money. We've got we've got really ow. money. >> Yeah. Really got. >> Yeah. And then you realize when you're. there in front of a sea of people. >> and you go in your mind, you're trying. to have a good time. >> Mhm. >> But in your mind, >> we're in a war. [laughter].

>> Would you ever go. >> to Coachella? >> Yeah. >> I I told you I think I I I went to like. the fifth or sixth one. >> Yeah. >> Ever? >> Yeah. >> And I've never been back. I went to it. and I was like, this is You know me. That is my nightmare. You know me, that's my nightmare. >> Thousands of people like I can't do. that. I I But you know, but you're. different in the fact that like you can. enjoy you can enjoy like the scene with. with with the family. >> You can with the girls. >> Was I enjoying. >> you eventually did? Yeah. You found like.

good in it with I can go to one show if. it's a one band I want to see one. I. can't do. >> You can't sit through Karen Carpenter. for the for like a festival of Karen. Carpenter. [laughter]. >> I can't do that. That gives me anxiety. I don't care. >> Where did you poop? Where do you poop? >> Oh, in they have nicer ones now. Oh, they do for the VIP. There's nicer ones. They look like like maybe a Nou um. bathroom. [laughter]. >> Yeah. Yeah, I went to Nou. I'll tell you. at Coachella. >> Yeah, I I'll tell you about my Nou, but.

I want to just say this. What? Yeah. >> So, the Nou was one thing. All right. So, so I I made a I made a promise with. myself. I'll never go back. I don't care. what it is. >> Thank you. >> It dep I don't care if it's the return. of Jesus Christ. I'll go to hell. [laughter]. Whatever. Yeah. Return of Jesus Christ, right? I ain't going. >> Would he play the main stage? You think. [laughter]. >> they couldn't get Jesus on the main. stage? >> They're like, "Look.". >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Ariana Grande beats the number. >> Harry Styles is going to get [laughter]. main stage. >> He's a stage coach.

>> Yeah. Yeah. >> That's so funny. >> Jesus is at Bonnaroo. >> Yeah. I mean, they could do the return. of the Beatles and have George and. John's Bones up there. Just, you know. what I mean? [laughter]. I I I would not go. You know what I. mean? I still would not marionette. >> Yeah, marionette. [laughter]. >> When you lose in my head. >> points of view, [laughter]. >> that would be so funny to say. >> I know. >> Tax man. [laughter]. >> Get in the tax man. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. That' be so. >> You still wouldn't go. >> You wouldn't go. No, you would never go. >> I would never go back. Right. Terrible. Do do the thing. So then Carlos says to. me, he goes, [laughter]. "I got you Nou." I go, "Where?" At. Coachella. And I go, "Oh, that's cool. Thank you." He's at 7:00. >> For my birthday, I got him Nou. >> How did you do that? >> And for for your birthday, I got you. Coachella. >> Thank you. I. >> You know what I mean? So I think that I. won. >> It's not a contest.

>> I know. But what you just said was. >> Oh, yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> No, you did. You did do that. You You. just did do that. >> I'm a little edgy. I. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Wait, why? >> Molly 18. >> So he gives me. >> Oh, okay. Can I just say I want to say. this one? >> And I'm going to gnark on you. >> So, first of all, you lied cuz. when I called you and we talked, I said, "Did you do you do any drugs at. Coachell?" And you said, "I didn't. consider Molly a drug because it's. >> Oh, it's not just drugs. It's not just. Oh, I'm sorry. Can [laughter] I. interrupt? Can I interrupt? Can I. interrupt?". >> Yeah. >> I thought. >> he comes out into the cuz we we Airbnb.

the house. Yeah. >> He comes into the living room. I'm. sorry. Happy birthday. He brings out a. Bible. >> Oh, no. [laughter]. >> Right. >> While you're on Molly. >> No. And he opens up the Bible. It's not. a Bible. >> It's a drug pharmacy. >> Carlos, >> you still have the drug Bible. [laughter]. >> That's insane. >> Yeah. [clears throat]. >> It's like a little travel case. His. little Bible. >> It has a lock on it. So proof. >> I know. Yeah. Oh, thanks. That's good. >> Dog and kid proof. That's why I brought.

it. >> Written Arab Arabic. [laughter]. still written in Arabic in his. Bible, right? >> Inshallah. >> Yeah. And so, are you mad at that? >> No. It made Bieber so much fun. >> Yeah. Yeah. So, then [laughter]. >> he makes me go to Nou now. It sounds. good. They make you go to. >> No. Hold. Stop. Let him get it out. Where is the Nou? >> Just in the middle of the festival. >> There's a Nou in the grounds. Like they. built a no. >> They built a Nou in the grounds. >> What? That's crazy. But unfortunately,

they built it. So you you're you're on a. patio outside and literally 200 feet. away is the stage of the EDM festival, right? So you're eating you're eating. you're eating sushi in an earthquake. [laughter]. It was the most unpleasant human. experience. [laughter]. >> And I felt bad for the sushi chefs. >> Oh yeah, >> cuz you have to be there all day. Oh, I.

bet they got paid handsomely. >> Oh, I I I hope so. >> I guarantee you they made so much. money on. >> because they're there all day listening. to this. >> That's the view from No, >> I got to tell you. >> That's the view. That's the stage and. and that's not one speaker. >> That's all of the speakers. >> Yeah. That's the kind of speakers in. Close Encounters with Third Kind they. communicated with aliens. >> Yeah. I mean, that's that speaker, too.

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>> Like it. >> as if I've never been there. >> Do you like it? >> In what way? Exactly. In what way? >> Ditto. >> Exactly. [laughter]. >> Ditto to you, my friend. >> Every time I go to Vegas, this. >> so much smoke. >> Oh, yeah. >> I can't breathe, dude. Michelle Wi says. hi, by the way. >> Who does? >> Michelle Wi. >> Oh, the athlete. >> Probably the greatest female golfer on. earth. She lo She loves you. >> Loves you. >> Oh, I wish Bobby would come to.

something. >> Yeah. >> Michelle Wi West. One of the best. And. then when we were watching the strokes, Josh Adam Myers walks by like in the. elite area. >> Do his voice. >> I Well, hey, I'm Josh Adams. [laughter]. >> I don't know. And you know, he's with. the Strokes. >> Mhm. >> You know what I mean? >> Mhm. >> And I go, "Hey, Josh." He doesn't turn. around and textes me later. Where are. you? >> Oh, you think he saw you and pretended. not see you? >> I don't know. >> That's up. >> I don't know. >> Bobby, I. >> You saw him, too, right?

>> Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. You think he did the thing. where it's like I don't. >> I don't know. >> I love that move though. What? >> I love that for him. >> Yeah, because he's in a different class. >> What does that mean? What do you mean? >> He's with the band. >> You're with the band. >> No, it wasn't. I was back. We went back. there to see them and I I couldn't get. to him. >> Yeah, he was looking for the stroke. [laughter]. >> I was. And you couldn't get to him? >> Yeah. Yeah. >> We couldn't find him. >> We couldn't find him. >> Yeah. [clears throat] But there was We. ran into that um comedian Megan. >> Stalter. Stalter. I said hi to her.

>> Oh, me Stalter. Yeah. Me Stalter. So. funny. And then I we ran into um. >> like Minnie Mouse. >> Yeah. >> She's funny. >> Yeah. >> And this one kid, we don't still don't. know who he is, but he had like um three. um what do you call him, Carlos? >> Oh, like. >> piercings on his right eye. >> and he was kind of sweating. He was. like, I just got off stage and. mainstage. We still don't know who it. was. >> A comedian. >> No, he was a performer. >> Oh, yeah. There was no comedy at. Coachella, right? >> Imagine. I mean, they could have they.

could have a comedy tent and do very. well. I bet. >> You think so? >> Ask at other festivals like. >> Yeah, they do that. What do you mean? >> But you wouldn't it wouldn't be our. types of comedy. >> I I looked at the demographic. There's. just no way. >> Who would it be? Who would headline. Coachella? >> Okay. Oh, this is good. This is this is. good. >> I mean, first of all, Chappelle could. easily do that. >> He could, but I'm talking about it would. be more um. >> like on the smaller tents. >> A smaller tent. More of a I could see. Mosha Casher. >> Yeah. >> These types, you know what I mean? >> East side. East side comedy side. Yeah,

I get that. >> I could see uh David Cross doing well. >> No way. He would never go out. there. >> That's another that when I said that, I. go I promise you this. I will not run. into a sing except for Meg, >> but she's an actress, right? I will not. run into a traditional standup comic. here ever cuz there's just I imagine. David Tell sitting there watching. [laughter] Karen Carpenter. >> No, but that's but that's not true. There's there comics that are into. psychedelics would absolutely go to. that. There's a lot of comics that like. music and psychedelics and I'm sure.

there's a lot of guys that would go do. that. >> I I I just I never ran into one. >> I bet you there's way more than you. thought were out there. You think so? I. I I would assume that like Yeah. No, not. you know. >> I couldn't see like a traditional. >> Not like Louis CK is not. >> Yeah. There's no way Louis is going to. be there watching. Yeah. I mean, Sabrina. Carpenter. >> No, but there's some people that are. that Yeah. There's some drug drug comics. that like to get high and listen to. music. And. >> also it What What When When did Bieber. end? 1:00 a.m. >> 1:00 a.m. Imagine being out there at. 1:00 a.m. in the desert.

>> It was great. >> Yeah, he loved it. >> Yeah, I'm 54. My body couldn't do it. >> You got to go home. >> I did the strokes and I did three hops. and then everything broke. [laughter]. >> Remember? >> He was hopping hard. >> Yeah, I was hopping hard. >> I broke from the stroke. [laughter]. >> I mean it I couldn't bo anymore. >> You loved it though cuz you were on. MDMA. >> Yeah, I took it for Bieber. I didn't. Yeah. >> Yeah, he did. No, you were taking it all. day long. I saw. >> No, those are mushrooms. >> Oh, okay. >> So, you're eating mushrooms all day and. then to Molly at night for Bieber? >> Yeah, it was the warm up.

>> Yeah, it was warm up. Yeah. Yeah. >> And then he slept in the house with you. >> He slept in the door. No, but I had to. lock the door. >> Yeah, [laughter] I was next to. >> Yeah. Yeah. He was literally right next. to me. I had to lock the door. >> How many? It was a lot of rooms. >> Yeah, there were a lot of. >> like 12 rooms. >> And you slept next to him? >> Mhm. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But I had to lock his. door to my room. >> Yeah. >> Because I was with my friend and it's. like I didn't want him to walk in. >> Right. >> Right. Cuz that would be. >> that would be gross. >> cuz then he would take his clothes off. >> 100%. [laughter]. >> You know what I mean? And then to try to. ram it in me. >> I thought about you on the week all.

weekend because I was with a table of. friends and one of my friends. girlfriends. >> didn't understand how I could pick out. which of the girls on the floor of the. casino were professionals. >> Oh, it's so easy. >> She's like, "How do you know?" I'm like, "What? It's so clear. Like, it's so. obvious what girls are out there.". >> Oh, tell me the rules. >> What's the hottest one wearing nice. shoes? >> First of all, dead giveaway at any. casino. You go to like the bar there. If. you're at a casino and you're not. gambling and. >> what casino? >> Any every all every everyone. >> all center of the because there's always. a center bar. >> Well, there's always a bar that's near.

where the tables are, right? Whether. people are paying $80 a drink, but you. can get a drink for free if you just. gamble. So, it's the dumbest. >> Yeah. >> So, it's usually. >> uh a single girl sitting alone who's. remarkably attractive wearing a dress. that's not even on her body. Yeah. >> And she's on her phone the whole time. Yeah. Right. And then she's waiting at. the bar for, you know, old man. McGillicuy to sit down. Yeah. Who's got. a suit jacket? The old guys always have. a suit jacket that are rich. They don't. dress like us. >> I love old men. >> Old men are the best. >> No. Middle Cuddy.

>> McGillicuy. >> Cuddy. [laughter]. >> McGillicuy. >> McGillicuy. >> McGillicuy. >> McGillicuy. >> Yeah. >> Okay. [laughter]. >> Yeah. And they're always alone. They. always are alone cuz then what they do. is. >> old manically. >> Mckicoly is not alone. Oh, he's not. alone. >> He's with guys, but the professional is. alone. And then she chums it up. Oh my. god. And then gives him the thought, oh, this is the And she's like, who you here. with? And he's with some some friends. She's like, let me get some of my.

friends. And then you'll see the. professionals start coming like moth to. a flame. A few other hot girls will some. somehow show up out of nowhere or light. bulb. >> in his older what? >> Or light bulb. >> Well, moth to a flame is the phrase, BUT. YEAH, [laughter]. >> I'm just any kind of source of light. >> Any kind of source of light. Yeah. >> Incandescent. >> I want to be. >> incandescent. Yeah. >> And they'll show up and then you'll just. notice. >> Yeah. >> five very slovenly looking middle of. nowhere men. >> Yeah. >> With three to five.

>> unbelievably attractive women wearing. nothing half of their age. And you're. like these guys are going to get run on. by these professionals. These girls are. going to take these guys. And we watched. it happen like live. And my friend's. girlfriend was like, >> "How did you how did you like call. that?" I was like, "It it's so. see-through. Why would that girl talk to. that guy? >> Because he's got the cash, baby. Go to. the high limit rooms. >> Always a professional walking around or. sitting kind of waiting near it. >> I would have no idea. >> It's so obvious. >> We saw that in Vegas last time. >> 100%.

>> So you can pick them off from a mile. away. >> Very easy. Yeah, >> it happened when we were uh where was I. just uh Oh, with. >> Cuz my assumption would be like, "Oh, she's her boyfriend's in the bathroom.". >> No, [laughter]. >> you know what I mean? Oh, she's just. waiting for her boyfriend in the. bathroom. >> You can always tell. >> Really? you. It's just there's a vibe. that they're doing that you're like. they're they're obviously waiting for. their target. Like they're waiting for. the target to arrive. If you walk up to. her and if guys walk up to her and flirt. with her, which I'm sure they do, she. probably them off. >> Why? >> Cuz she's looking for the She goes.

fishing. >> Mhm. >> She's not looking to be caught. She's. fishing. >> Oh, she's fishing. >> She's finding the idiot that she's. looking to take down. So, they find the. guy. >> You when you see you see all these. things like target, take down. What is. going on here? >> They're all in the military. >> [laughter]. >> Yeah, cuz you're scaring me. >> Well, they work. They seriously work. So, like that's everything is strategy. You can just see the way they operate. It's all strategy by the way they they. operate with these guys. But you we. watched it happen and she was shocked. She like couldn't believe it. I was. like, "Well, we saw it in Vegas. together. It was so you and then when I. was with Gillis, same thing. We sit at.

the bar. Me and D. Rosa are sitting at. the bar. >> having [clears throat] a cocktail.". >> Yeah. >> I'm about to go to bed cuz I play golf. the next morning. >> Yeah. And this girl is sitting alone and. then she slowly is like kind of leaning. in on our conversation and she zones in. on D. Rosa and I slowly fade off into. the background, >> right? >> And I can see it happening. >> You become a whisper. >> And I texted him. I said, "Joe, don't do. anything stupid.". >> Oh. >> And I disappoint. >> So, but what happens next? >> Then she chats who you get formal. >> Tell me the rules. >> Then he buys her a drink. He buys her a.

drink. You can then it's like, "Oh, let's have another have another drink.". >> How much is that? >> Do you want to gamble? Drinks at those. bars are like 25 bucks probably. They're. a ripoff. >> Yeah, but they don't drink. So, >> and then she goes, "Oh, I want to go. gamble. Do you want to g Oh my god, let's go gamble. Just you and me. Separate him from the herd." Right. This. is how they kill their prey. >> They go, "Let's go gamble. You and me.". So, then they take him to a table. Dude, I I've seen it happen. >> I've seen it happen. >> And then they take him to a table or. they go, "Let's play slots." Whatever. And it's like, >> so you can tell this guy, this target, right? You can call them the USA. [laughter].

>> I mean, Right. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> So, you take the USA. >> into, you know, I mean, a hostile. environment. >> cuz the USA thinks he's the man. I'm the. man. [laughter]. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. YEAH. YEAH. I GOT. MONEY. >> I GOT MONEY. >> I GOT MONEY. I'M I'LL GIVE YOU MONEY. >> I'LL GIVE YOU WHATEVER YOU WANT. >> WHATEVER YOU WANT. [laughter] OKAY. NOW, I'm beginning to see it now. Yeah. >> I'm beginning to see it now. Yeah. Okay. >> Maybe the greatest analogy of all time. >> I [laughter] think so. I think so. I. think it's perfect. It's perfect. >> And they separate them. They start to. gamble. They're drinking more. They're.

gambling. Right. >> Maybe. Then then then comes in the. dropout. >> Yeah. >> Should we get a bag? >> Whoa. >> Do you want to Oh, do you like to party? >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Then this drops in. Right. Then you. start to see the swirl. >> What do you mean? What's a bag? >> Coke. >> Do you want a bag? >> Should we get a bag? >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. And then depending on if. >> Is that the term? >> Get a bag. Yeah. >> Yeah. Cuz I wouldn't know what that. meant. And she goes, "If you want a. bag," I go, "A bag of groceries?". [laughter] "Well, you want you want. Instacart? >> Let's go to Trader Joe. I wouldn't know.

the term. >> be so funny to take a prostitute just to. Trader Joe's. >> Yeah. Yeah. [laughter]. >> Yeah. You take her. >> This is what I meant. You know what I. mean? >> I just want stuff for my apartment. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Then they they ask for drugs and if the. if the subject is. >> like if I said um I don't do bags. >> No, that's fine. You're probably less. likely now for her to attack harder. >> Oh, okay. So, give me the situation. All. right. I say Okay. I say All right. >> So, you're sober. >> Yeah. I'm I've been sober for four. years. >> Oh, >> and I'm I'm going to talk like. Coachella. >> [laughter].

>> I just wanted to go. I was just there. You know what I mean? Hydray. >> And then so I. >> All right. So I'm the professional. >> You're the professional. So Oh, yeah. I. don't do drugs. I've been sober for 4. years. I don't have it back. >> That's no [laughter] problem. >> There's That's not a problem. >> Not at all. >> Okay. So what do we do next? >> Let's go gamble some more. >> Okay. Let's gamble. So we're gambling. I. spent about three grand. Right. And then. at one point, what happens after that? >> She goes, "Oh god, is this hotel nice?". >> Oh, yeah. I have a suite here. >> You do? >> Yeah. Can we can I check it out? I want. to see. I've never seen the sweets here.

>> Okay. >> See, you're in. >> All right. So, we go to the elevator. Boop. You because you have to put the. boop. And. >> you're in the elevator. >> Yeah. Yeah. And you take your You have. to hack your room key. Boop. It. >> right. >> Yeah. So, once you see the room, I mean, what happens? >> I just want to check it out. >> Oh, you want to check it out? All right. We're in the room. >> Is there a mini bar in here? >> Yeah. >> I want to do a shot. Let's do a shot. >> Yeah. I don't drink. I just said. that. I don't do bags or drink. >> Can I do a shot? >> Yeah, I guess. >> Okay. I do a shot. Right. >> Ready? I'm feeling good. It's warm in. here. Shirts off. Tits out.

>> Wait, Andrew. >> Yeah. >> She needs to go to the bathroom first to. text her pimp that she's okay. >> Oh, >> the bathroom. Yeah. Yeah. >> By the way, by the way. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> I've only seen this from the floor. level. >> Carlos needs to take it from here. [laughter]. >> Right. >> I I actually don't know the next move. I'm making it up as we go. But. >> that sounds right. >> She text her. Well, tell us what they do. when they get into the room. >> Yeah. Hold on. Can I use your restroom? And then like it's like 10 minutes. It's. way too long. like things are happening. >> How much does this cost, >> Carlos? >> Yeah.

>> In Vegas, a G minimum. And then she's. going to be she's going to take her. shirt off. >> Yeah. >> She be like, "Oh, if you want to do. anything else, you have to tip me.". >> So they take their shirt off. >> Yeah. They're like, "Okay.". >> And she says, "You have to tip me." But. you already paid her $1,000. >> Anything else is extra? You have to tip. me. >> So $1,000 is just to hang with her. >> Yeah. Just for 5 minutes. >> No, that's No way. >> That I'm serious. >> For nothing. >> That's how they really I'm out. >> That's how they rip. >> You're not even getting like a tuggy or. something? >> No. That's how they rip people off in. Vegas or LA. You have to. >> It feels too, you know what I mean? >> The only story I know.

>> Yeah. >> I mean, other than the ones you've told. me, but from a friend of mine. >> who isn't a guy that would do this. usually, this was very out of pocket for. him, but I think he was newly single and. going through a rough patch. >> Yeah. >> This is a long time ago. But he told me. um they were drinking and he thinks that. she drugged him. >> Well, okay. She know he knows. I mean, he was drinking all day. He was. hammered. >> Yeah. >> But then he passed out. Blacked out. passed out and then when he woke up his. watch and his cash were gone. >> Oh yeah, that happens to like NBA.

players all the time. >> They I mean they call in their friends. to call. >> Well then what's what's the worth what. is it worth it? There's it's not worth. it. Not that way. >> Just jerk off. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> No, >> that's what I do. Just jerk off. >> Yeah. But see, but here's the. difference. >> Or get on Lexapro. >> Get in on SSRI. [laughter]. >> Yeah, >> that does help. >> This the commercial for SSRIs. Are you. having trouble with prostitutes? [laughter] Let's get on an SSRI. >> No, but so have you been robbed before? >> No. No, because I've. >> But you know the stories.

>> Yeah. You know, >> so you keep doing. >> I've been in those situations and I've. like backed out. >> But why are you still doing it knowing. that it's dangerous? >> Oh, that was so long ago. No, >> I'm the pro. >> No, but here's I [laughter] know you're. so But here's the thing about you. >> You think you're the pro. You like you. like excitement. >> Yeah. >> You're you're sort of like a Navy Seal. in that way. Exactly. Where it's in no. other way whatsoever. >> [laughter]. >> is so disrespectful to Navy Seals. YEAH. >> LIKE some of the most like adored.

athletically, mentally, physically. strong. >> You are nothing like the Navy Seals. >> Except for this one. >> Except for this. [laughter]. >> And we train in California. >> They train all They turn all over the. place. All over the world. Yeah. Water. >> By the way, he's going to run. >> Are you good at water? >> I'm good at water. >> Okay. He's good at him swim. >> No. >> Not a not a water guy. >> You're not You're not a water guy. >> He's You know what you are? You're not a. seal. >> Yeah, >> you're you're Well, you're a beached. seal. >> That's nice. You're chilling on the. beach. >> Oh, it'd be so funny if his like you. know what I mean? His his patrol or.

what? Right. They're they're on they're. fighting. Where's Carlos? And he's still. swimming. [laughter]. >> This is two days in. >> 100 yards off the shore. I'm on my way. [laughter]. >> I be vaping the whole time. >> You'd be vaping in the water. >> Yeah. You're not a seal. >> Watching basketball on my iPhone. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. By the way, vaping I. wish overtook cigarettes completely. because of this in Vegas every time. >> And [clears throat] now it's like people. still smoke in Vegas even though I know. they don't smoke back where they're. from. This game people play. >> Just vape. Please vape cuz I don't I.

don't I'm huffing and puffing your. at the Just vape. Everywhere should be. vape. There should be only sell vapes. everywhere all over Vegas. No more. cigarettes. It's obnoxious. How. is he a Navy Seal again? >> I forgot. [laughter]. >> I spaced out. >> Oh no. I I know why. Because you like. extreme Yes. >> You mean you want you like danger? You. like danger. You like living on the edge. even at your age. >> Aerosmith. >> Yeah. Yeah. And you like um the mystery. of it all. >> Yeah. >> Like the chase. >> Mhm. >> Yeah.

>> Yeah. I've like run from the cops three. times. >> Yeah. You told me about the motorcycle. thing and stuff like that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> But but so now you think you've got it. at a place where if you get if you pay. for a friend. >> Yeah. If we're going to say this. eloquently, >> you think you're safe from any sort of. >> Oh, I know I am because I'm like a. member of certain things where it's all. verified. >> What do you mean you're in a private. club? >> Mhm. >> Oh, >> yeah. >> I'm going to tell you this right now. Whatever. >> I want to know how much you pay to be in. the private club. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Oh, I got in early. >> You got in early. You invested earlier.

>> Like it's I literally [laughter]. like it's AI. >> It's insanity trading. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Who else is in there? >> Yeah. Who else is in there? What other. insider traders are in there? [laughter]. >> I feel like there are famous people in. there, but I would. >> in your private club. >> Wow. >> I believe that if Carlos was a king. >> Oh, this is what you said about if I if. Carlos was a king that we'd all be dead. >> Popper. Popper. Popper. >> Yeah. What do you mean? >> Popper. Popper. Popper. >> Was it a popper? Popp. >> king. A prince or popper. He's a popper. He's a popper. >> Yeah. Yeah. But do you think we'd be.

alive. >> if he was a king? >> Yeah. >> Only because of the loyalty that we've h. he's had to us so far, we'd still live. through his his. >> Yeah. But what position will we have? >> Well, ask him. He's right there. >> Yeah. Like, so you're king. What. position do I have? And be completely. honest. >> Well, obviously you're my court's. jester. >> Yeah, that's fine. Of course. >> You're my fool. >> What do I get, though? >> I'm your fool. >> You're my fool. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> You I keep you drunk and I make you. relapse. [laughter]. >> Wow. Okay. >> And you And you have a chain around your. neck. >> I do. >> like a bear in Russia in like the 1800s.

>> Yeah. But do I get like a condo or an. area to a good night's sleep? >> Oh, please in the castle to sleep. >> The jester lives in the basement. He I. live in the basement. >> No, I would give him like a really cool. view of like the ocean. >> Oh, go cool. >> Yeah, he gets everything. >> Can I get No. Ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch. ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch. ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch. ch ch ch ch ch ch. >> NO CHAIN ALWAYS. >> WHY? >> YEAH, THERE'S JUST CHAINS and you have a. guy walking with you all the time to. watch you. >> Oh, I have like a an assistant. >> But no, it's a bodyguard, but he works. for me. He's watching you all. >> Right. Right. Right. >> Just making sure you don't get any ideas. to leave. >> Exactly. >> Anything. >> Yeah. Yeah. To anything.

>> All right. What am I? >> Well, just one last question. I'm sorry. I'm the gesture, so I got to have a. couple. >> Well, the gesture is not allowed to. speak. Really? >> I know. But how many times do I have to. perform? How many times do I have to. perform? >> Whenever I want when I wake up, I need. like a funny like ringtone. >> Yeah. You go Oh, when like my phone. rings, it has to always be on silent, but you do the ringtone vocally. >> Exactly. >> Okay. [laughter]. >> All right. >> I would love that one. >> Yeah. Yeah. Do I get to have a. girlfriend? >> Um, >> think carefully, King.

This is why they're doing the no kings. protest, by the way. >> If you behave after like 3 years, we'll. review it again. Oh, you get to apply. Yeah. >> So, I get nothing until three years. >> Yeah, [laughter] exactly. >> You get absolutely nothing. >> I'm gonna change your taste in um. humans. >> Do I get Wi-Fi? >> I'm going to turn you full gay. >> Yeah. Do I get Wi-Fi? >> Yeah, you can have Wi-Fi. >> Okay, cool. >> Turn him full gay. >> You get turn me full gay? >> Yeah. I'm going to do experiments where. I get him hard, but there's like. pictures of men and so like reactivate. his brain to only be attracted to men.

[laughter]. >> This sounds like just Hollywood. >> Yeah. Yeah. I've been in this casting. >> Yeah, I don't want to be. Yeah, I try. Yeah, chain's a good idea because I. would want to get out. What is Andrew? >> Where am I on the king's on the king's. court? >> And don't don't talk out of fear. >> Yeah, don't. >> No, I have a good one for you. >> All right, good. >> Head of the air force. >> Wow. >> With honor, my king, >> which means he's nowhere near you. >> That's right. >> Yeah, he's out there. He's. >> He's out there. >> I'm out there. He's telling what drones. to do what. >> What? >> He's telling drones what to. >> I'm starting war, dog.

>> Yeah. >> If he's the king, >> do we have communication? No. Why? >> Only talks to me. >> Yeah, but I can't talk to him. Like, how's the war going? >> Well, can I come see the jester war? [laughter]. >> You need a if you need a laugh and. things are too hard. >> Yeah. Yeah, you can come over. >> This is a romantic comedy that I'm the. head of of the Royal Air Force and I. have to sneak to come see you do shows. and afterwards we hang out late night. around. >> This is like a romantic love story. >> Infuriate me though. >> You're never going to catch us. >> There'll be an opening on the door,

right? [laughter] And and the chain only. goes gets to the opening of the door, right? So you hear. and I go, "Handra going, hey.". >> Yeah. How are you, buddy? >> Not great, dude. Two years I haven't. been delayed. [laughter]. >> Yeah. And I think I'm gay. Let me suck. >> I love you. I got to go. I got to go. >> Yeah. >> I have to go bomb Iran. >> Okay. [laughter] Yeah. All right. So, what is Mcone's What is Men's job? Mhm. Oh, he obviously just like films and.

vlogs everything for me, >> right? >> So, he's doing that. >> So, he gets a better job than me. [laughter]. >> Yeah. >> No, you all do what y'all are best at. >> That's true. >> Yeah. YEAH. BUT WHY DO I HAVE A CHAIN? >> CUZ YOU'RE THE BEST FOOL. Uh [laughter]. >> you're the best fool. >> And the chain is because I always want. you to make me laugh and I think it will. get tiring and and you won't be allowed. to leave. >> But eventually I I will stop making you. laugh. >> cuz you know my temperament. >> Experiments. Oh, then you do like. scientific experience on me. >> Does mouse all access to the to the.

kingdom? >> He has a filming. >> He has an all access a band. >> This is where the king up. >> All right. What? What? What? What? What. band do I have? >> G. >> General admission. >> You're gen admission. [laughter]. >> General admission for sure. I GAVE YOU. VIP FOR COACHELLA. >> WHAT DO I HAVE? What do I have? What. band am I at? >> You're artist pass for sure. >> Oh, I get artist pass. So, I'm not all. access, but I just get. >> Yours says AF. Air Force. >> Air Force. Air Force Access. >> Yeah. >> And can I tell you something? Listen. He. This is where he up cuz the king.

already laid out the rules. >> Mone, you know damn well. >> Oh no. >> Is going to eventually sneak down to the. jester's cave. >> Yeah. >> Because of his crush on you. >> and break you free. You know he's going. to go behind Carlo. >> He will not. You know what will happen. in that opening? >> I'll just see a camera. [laughter]. >> He'd be filming you. >> He'll be just filming me. It's great. content. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's. not going to help at with. >> I disagree. >> Am I right, though? You would try to. break him out, wouldn't you, you little. >> Now, I'd film for a bit, but then when.

he was doing the same things, we did. something new for the video. So, we'll. break him out. >> And Pete, where's Pete in this whole. thing? >> Yeah, Pete is not around a lot. >> No, we have a royal podcast every week. >> Ah, and I like that. >> It's the only one available. >> and he stays in the podcast space. >> Yeah, he's a producer, but. >> but he's not allowed to leave the. podcast room. >> He doesn't want to. We. >> I'm a good podcaster. Can I be in the. podcast? >> Of course. You're the fool. [laughter]. >> My Air Force sergeant is telling me. something. >> No. No. That's a threat to security, sir. >> Oh, >> it is. >> We can't have that. The king. >> Okay. All right. And then what does um.

Andreas have? >> Well, this is interesting. What does the. king do with Andreas? >> Yeah. >> Head of fashion in our country. [laughter]. >> He designs the He designs the uniforms. for the military. The least fashionable. guy on this show is the head of fashion. That's the funniest thing I've ever. [laughter] said. That's insane. >> What's that? Did you What's the clothes. he. >> wear? We're all working. [laughter]. >> Half plaid shirt.

>> You end up he ends up designing the. kingdom. It's all you kingdom. >> Oh my god, it would look terrible. Oh my. god. >> And we're changing the language. And. Andreas is uh the head of that. We're. changing it to Spanish. >> We're going to be speaking Spanish. >> Yeah. It'll be like we're in LA. >> Yeah. >> How can I be funny? I don't know. Spanish. >> You're going to learn it. You're going. to. >> Oh, okay. >> A Mexican cartoon or something. >> The gestures only have one good phrase. Look up in Spanish how to say um piss in. my mouth. [laughter].

>> Here. [laughter]. >> Let's hear it. >> That's all I say. >> Very good. [laughter] The gesture just. flux, bro. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Constantly people. peeing in my mouth. >> Wow. That's how you feel about me. [laughter]. >> That's how you feel about me? >> You really did? >> Yeah. Yeah. >> You're You're so funny. There's a lot of. creativity to throw. >> Yeah. Yeah. I bought for every meal at. Coachella. [laughter].

>> No. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I I got you VIP and. good Coachella. >> We got better than VIP. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I got you um a free. place to stay in in Coachella. >> Thank you. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm still the. gesture gets his peed on and is gay. [laughter]. >> I thought it. >> Is that the rule? >> I I thought it'd be an honor. >> It's not an honor, dude. It's a. disgrace. I get the worst job in your. kingdom. >> No, it's incredible. >> It's not incredible, DUDE. I HAVE A. CHAIN on my neck. I live in a cave. >> But for me, it's gray. We get to hang. out all the time.

>> NO, I'M NOT HANGING out with you, dude. >> Well, no. He's You're hanging out with. him. He's not hanging out with you. That's the difference. You have to hang. with him. >> I'm going to tell you right now. >> Click on that one more time. Yeah. What? Just let me hear it. >> And [laughter]. >> we got to make a merch shirt of him. going. piss in my mouth. Orina. >> I bet I could convince him to move up, I. think. >> No chance. >> Oh, dude. I'm I'm He's so highly. manipulative. >> The power. Look at That's you. That's. you and Carlos. >> YEAH. [laughter].

>> Oh my god, dude. IT'S SO. [laughter]. OH MY GOD. [laughter]. THAT'S HOW YOU FEEL. THAT'S HOW YOU FEEL. ABOUT ME, DUDE. [laughter]. >> BECAUSE I THINK that's fun, man. IT. MAKES. >> THAT'S FOR ME, THOUGH. >> I LOVE YOU, DUDE. >> YEAH, THAT'S NOT LOVE. >> FORCE LOVE. >> I'M. >> NO, IT'S FORCED LOVE. ALL RIGHT. [laughter] Force love. >> It's force love, >> dude. I want that photo here. I want.

that in the studio. Yeah, >> that is Mary Evans. That's amazing. >> Now, what does Jules get? [clears throat] Rudy. M. [snorts]. >> Oh, that's interesting. >> She's like in our CIA. >> Oh, she's in She gets a higher position. as well. >> Zero dark. Zero dark. >> Zero dark 30. She is watering. >> She is our assassin. She's our secret. assassin. >> Secret assassin. Knives water. >> I'm going to work closely with her on. using her to infiltrate other kingdoms. to try to make yours more expensive. >> You have so much. You guys get so cool. You know what I would do? I would do a. monochrist.

I would take a a piece of rock. >> and start slowly. >> 25 years slowly chipping away at a you. know I mean I just need a like a Breijit. Fonda some poster. >> good double good double reference I like. it. >> yeah. Shaw Shank Monte Crystal right I one day. I would go for my birthday. >> what' you say they have fussy britches. >> yeah yeah can I. [cough and clears throat] can I get a um. whatever poster what is that. >> oh you're going to wake him he's going. to wear one of those a mask. >> we're trying to do that. >> so when you try to break [laughter] Oh. Oh. When you catch me.

>> Yeah. >> So, you're going to do poster. inspections? >> 100%. I've seen Shaw. >> OH, HOW. >> You're going to be in a mask. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Iron mask. >> Are there other people? Let me ask you. this. >> Hey, by the way, can still arena in Mioa. in that too? >> Yeah. Yeah. [laughter]. >> It's in your eye. Look at that. Look how. big the whole mouth is. >> Yeah. And it's it's so close off on the. neck, it fills up. [laughter]. >> Oh my god. What? Those eyes are pre-cut. for you. >> I want the right one. That looks cooler. >> That looks like yours.

>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That looks cooler. I. look like Batman mask. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. [laughter]. >> So, are there other um people where I'm. living the caves? Are there other. people? >> I love you. Don't worry. >> Oh, oh, I'm not worried. >> He wants to know about community. >> Oh, look at the look at the. ocean while in a that mask and a. chain. >> Well, that's the only thing if you. misbehave, dude. >> Where's the castle, by the way? What. location are we? >> What does the castle look like? Try to. find it. No, we've moved the capital um. from DC to LA. >> So we live here and we live. >> Malibu. Malibu.

>> Malibu. >> That's at least nice. >> Iron Man for you. >> Where? I don't live. >> for all of you but me. >> No. >> I'm the head of the Air Force. I live. way in the middle of No, you live at the. castle on the sea. That's This is where. you live. >> Yeah. You know what I get? This is what. I'm going to do. I'll look out the. window and go, "Oh, there's Mel Gibson. [laughter]. running on the beach.". >> That's what the c what the castle looks. like. >> Bowser's castle, right? >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Honestly. And then where am I now? Just. like. >> So this is where I'm at all the time. >> Yeah. >> Penthouse. >> The penthouse. Yeah. Where am I at?

>> In the face. >> Well, that's not the facing the ocean. >> Oh, well, >> it's Oh, that's facing the ocean. >> It is. >> It's ocean of lava. >> All right. So, can I see the left tower. or far left tower? Can I be there? >> No, dude. You don't get to choose. [laughter]. >> There's only so many chains. >> It's a chain issue, dude. >> You have plenty of chains. Also, dude, that that left that that left tower, that's the bathroom. >> Oh, it is? Yeah. >> I'd rather Okay. >> Yeah. See, you'll live up there. >> Oh, where? Near you. >> Yeah. Yeah. You're right under me. >> Yeah. Yeah. You're not going to sleep.

I'll tell you that. Am I screaming? >> You know, they used to do that. They. used to like carve out little pieces so. they would poop over the wall outside of. the castle. So, it would fill up the. moat with like poop and pee and stuff. like that. So, it would deter people. from trying to swimming through it. >> Am I near there? >> You're by the poop pee moat. >> Yeah. But you also have to clean it. because I want It has to be see-through. So he gets to clean the poop moat every. day. Oh, he collects the buckets. >> whenever HE WANTS. >> OH, WHENEVER I WANT. [laughter]. WHENEVER. All day long. >> Yeah, it's whenever. >> He collects the buckets from all. the.

>> You know, my work ethic that is going to. be filled with and peeing. I ain't. doing. >> You're going to love the iron mask. Then. >> I'll wear the iron mask and pee in my. face. I don't care. [laughter]. >> This is the issue. >> Yeah. Yeah. It's a big issue. >> Your colony would be called the. castles. Ah, down at cast. >> All right. You're the king. >> Oh, brother. >> Yeah. Yeah. What am I? >> Phenomenal. >> What am I? >> If I'm the king. >> Yeah. [sighs]. >> What are you? >> Yeah. >> I would I You're going to not like this. answer. [laughter].

>> What? >> You're not going to like this answer. >> Oh, all right. >> You're going to be my queen. >> Oh, that's way better than. fa pace. >> Yeah. But but but the queen gets beaten. daily. >> Oh, yeah. >> By you. >> All of us. >> By the king. Oh, >> my entire court. [laughter]. >> And the queen's only allowed one phrase. >> Eat what? >> It's in my mouth. Yeah, it's [laughter]. the same phrase,

>> dude. I get treated like in this. >> No, no, no, no. You're my queen. >> Let's be real. I don't want to be your. queen. You could have a woman. >> No, >> your wife. >> No, I want you. >> Yeah. No, I know. >> You're my little. >> Give me something aside from queen. I'm. begging you. >> All right. You'll be my geisha girl. >> [laughter]. >> IS THAT. CAN I BE VICE PRESIDENT? Do you think. Give me a good rule. >> Do you think in medieval times you would. be anything but a a jester or Gisha. girl? That's what you would be. >> No, no, no. Give me How about this? Just. send me out and I'll like be like a um.

what do you call it? >> Can't trust you in the field. >> No. Like you go you're a representative. IN BELGIUM. >> NO. >> YES. >> That's you there. [laughter]. >> What What can't I have? What do you call. them? Um, >> an ambassador. >> An ambassador. Give me an am Alaska. >> We can't have you represent us. >> Yeah. Anywhere. >> No. >> Yeah. Yeah. How about a place that no. one wants to go? >> Where? >> Right. Like, you know that little area. between South America and North America. where all those snakes and all that. where people can't walk? >> Central America.

>> Yeah. [laughter] Yeah. >> Central America. >> There's a chunk of land where there's no. roads. It's impossible to get through. because of it's just the terrain and no. one lives there and because there's so. many snakes. >> The guy in Plurbus got through it. >> Yeah. So, that area? Yeah. >> Yeah. Can I be the that? >> But then you're going to live there. >> Yeah, I will find a way to live there. >> I don't like you begging. No castle. [laughter]. >> I can't even get that. >> My queen. Back to the castle. >> Oh, I'm with both. How. about you, Pete?

>> Pete's my designated toe sucker, by the. way. >> Oh, yeah. >> Pete sucks my toes every single night. >> I'll do it. >> Lucky. >> And see, I'll do it. See, >> can I do toe sucking? No way. Do my toe. sucking ability. >> You're not sucking toe. >> Yeah, dude. >> No. beats on it. >> I'll even. >> I'll even rim the toes. [laughter]. >> You want me to rim your toes? >> All right. >> All right. Okay. Well, Carlo, what would. Carlos be in my kingdom? What would he. be in your kingdom? >> Oh, dude. He wouldn't be in the kingdom. >> Oh, so now this is retaliation. Is that. what enemy?

>> Oh, yeah. Yeah. You're definitely enemy. of state. Yeah. You're number one on the. FBI most wanted list. >> You're Bin Laden. >> That's cool. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> And everybody's hunting you. >> Everyone's hunting you. >> Yeah. every country. I'm going to have. everyone uh hunt you. >> Sounds awesome. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're a dead. man, dude. >> Andreas would be my my groundskeeper for. sure. [laughter]. >> Oh, yeah. Yeah. >> He'd make everything so nice. >> Not fashion, but ground. >> Ground. Ground. He can do fashion in the. grounds. >> Yeah. Yeah. [laughter]. >> If he wants to des landscape, he can.

>> he can desc. >> Oh. >> Oh. And he's the head head lesbian leg. >> The head leg of the lesbian legs show. Yeah. Yeah. Cuz your legs are like a. lesbians. Just puffy, wide, thick. You. know what I mean? >> Come over here. >> Let me see your legs. >> Yeah. Your legs are the worst. >> We got to see these things. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> You do have weird legs. >> Yeah. >> Take your pants off. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Subaru Outback. >> Yeah. Subaru Outback. Yeah. >> Those are those are kind of like.

lesbian. >> If you shave them, they would be. lesbian-like. [laughter]. >> Yeah. >> Get out of here, softball player. >> Yeah. >> McCone in my in my world in my kingdom. I would send him on missions that have. no purpose whatsoever [laughter]. >> just to get him out of the kingdom for a. little while. You know, I'm like, "You. have to go to the land of Quanang and. find a three-legged woman." [laughter]. >> HE'S GONE for like 6 months, >> years. >> And he comes back defeated, >> "My lord, I could not find a. three-legged woman.". >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Fine. Then you'll complete yet another.

mission. You'll fail yet one more. >> Yeah. >> And I'll send him out again to do what? >> What? >> What's the other mission we send him out. for? >> Oh, stats. >> Stats. >> Yeah. You must go to Kolonga. >> Konga. >> and count every single strawberry. [laughter]. ever grown in one season. I don't want. the numbers off at all. >> And if they are. >> Yeah. If they ARE. >> OFF WITH YOUR HEAD. >> OFF with your head. >> This is what you do on tour already. You'd send me on impossible missions. >> Impossible missions. The best. >> I love sending him on missions. >> And then you criticize him when he comes. back and he fails them cuz of course he.

would fail them. How could he do. anything otherwise? >> Pete would be executioner. >> Oh. >> Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'd have him with. the the the black so accurate. >> It's so accurate. Black. No one knows. who you are, so don't feel guilty. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> You can tell it's Pete. >> Yeah. I'll be good at it. >> Look, it's just that. >> that's that. Yeah, that's Pete. >> Yeah. But he walks up. He's like, "Hey, it's Pete." He. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. [laughter] People know. his name. >> Pete. Yeah. It's Pete. Pete the Butcher. >> Pete the Butcher. >> Yeah. There's There's a You mean. >> Yeah.

>> Pete the Butcher. >> Pete's so funny. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Oh, yeah. That's me. >> Yeah. >> We try to cut off somebody's head. the. rig doesn't work and Pete's like it must. be the USBC wire that's not [laughter]. Yeah. Like oh. >> And then Andreas for me would be. spokesperson. >> A lot of miscommunication. >> I know. That's why that's why. >> right what I tell him is not going to be. No one's going to understand what he's. saying. >> It's like code. >> Yeah. It's code. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> It's actually brilliant. >> Yeah. It's no one's going to understand. >> No one's going to understand what he's. saying. >> We plan to visit tomorrow. [laughter]. >> Yeah. Yeah.

>> What do the king's communicator say? >> You speak only through him. >> Yeah. And I go, "Well, you know, [laughter] all the information I told. him.". >> Italian Trump. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. I tell you this right now. In two. weeks. [laughter] In two weeks, it'll be. done. You know what I mean? >> But yeah, I would be he would be my. communicator. >> But for fashion, I would have to go go. for outside help. >> Yeah. Who's designing? >> Rick Ingram. [laughter].

I mean, that's. >> [laughter]. >> Just standard gap. >> Just guy. >> Yeah. Guy. Gap. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I'm not dressed like that as the. king. >> You make your court. >> No. I'm Balenciaga. You know what I. mean? Gucci. You know what I mean? But. like everyone else, Rick is one of the. funniest comics in the world. >> In the world. >> But he has just standard common people. fashion. >> Shirt. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> T-shirt, jeans, and you know, >> I'm that way though. I'm t-shirt. I'm. standard white.

>> Yeah. Yeah. Standard white. >> Standard white. A standard white. clothing style except for me. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Except for you. The king. >> The king. >> And the king wears what? What does the. king wear? >> Oh, Jesus Christ. Um, probably every day. is a different, you know, vari. And then. like. >> No, Vra is the knockoff. [laughter]. >> Verac. >> Oh, >> What king was known to have the best. fashion? Louis the 14th. They said this.

guy was. >> best fashion. Also was gay, right? [laughter] I mean, he was gay. Give us. like a straight king. That's Bobby Lee. >> Yeah, >> that's 100% Bobby Lee. >> Well, [clears throat] do you are you. going to do anything for your birthday? >> I did it all weekend. I I'm going to. watch Euphoria and take Xanax later. That's my big plan. >> God, >> what's this big about Euphoria? I I I. I'm not Have you done it, Bob? >> Euphoria? No. I see the kids watching it. and I I try to sit there and watch. >> and it's like not my thing.

>> Not for you. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Well, good. Have fun on Euphoria. We We. got you a little something. >> Yeah, we did. And also, you know, as you. get older, you know, there's just some. things you just can't watch anymore. >> Why? What Euphoria? Why. >> I think this has Let's tie it into. Coachella. It's just like there's. there's a language that it's just it's. just too young and too new and hip. And. >> I like how you're bringing out Carlos's. cake to me, but it's going to him. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Well, for the cameras, >> you guys are also on camera in the. booth.

>> Yeah. >> Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to. you. Happy birthday, dear Carlos. >> Happy birthday to you. >> 38. >> 39. >> 39. >> Make a wish. >> Wow. >> Wow. 40 next year, dude. >> Mhm. >> I can't believe it. >> And you know what he said by 40, you. know, he's going to have. >> what? >> Oh, yeah. I'm going to have hair. >> He's going to get his hair done. >> Have hair. Yeah. >> So, he'll have hair before while he's 40. years old. And those are nuggets, right?

And then we also got you an Airwan. smoothie there from uh Which smoothie is. that? Who's is that? Is that one of the. girls that was at Coachella? >> The Haley Bieber one. >> There you go. yeah. >> Was she there? >> Yeah, dude. She was. >> Does she sing? Is she a perform? What. does she do? >> She's Alec or Steven Baldwin's daughter. >> I know. She's married to Justin Bieber. I'm saying, does she What does she do? Is she a singer? >> Hang. She's a mom. She's a beauty. >> Before she met him. >> What are you angry for? [laughter]. >> Cuz they're saying it like. >> she's a nice person. >> I'm saying she's so angry for. >> What did she do? >> Oh yeah. She. >> She's a Al Ball's daughter.

>> She just famous. >> Yeah. >> Oh, that's so good. >> Is that good? >> Yeah. Hell yeah. Thank you, guys. >> Dude, I did, you know what I did the. other day when I was in Arizona before I. went to Vegas? I did the Bad Boy. >> the Bad Boy mini bar. >> I went back to the room, watched movies, and I ate clear. I ate the entire. mini bar. >> You were that hungry. Beef jerky, two. bags of chips. I was just like feeling I. was having a night, dude. >> Done that in our room. >> It's so fun. Isn't it so fun to clear it. out? Cuz you're like, I might as well. get for the other I was like, chocolate almonds. I was like, yeah, absolutely. And then I was like, you. know, I'm being pretty good with these.

>> Yeah. Gummy bears. >> Gummy bears. [laughter] Yeah. Yeah. Don't you hate it when you go to a hotel. and there is no. >> It's a joke. >> It's a joke. They have a empty. refrigerator. Like you have to go and. >> No snacks. >> No snacks. Here's the Here's Let's name. the things that are there. >> Okay. Yeah. All right. There's always. like a um artisan bag of potato chips. >> Yeah. A brand local. A brand that you a. brand that you don't know. >> You've never heard of. >> Yeah. >> Mama Jenkins Hickory Barbecue. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And it's like local. >> Local owned. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Number two, beef. jerky.

>> Always. >> Always beef jerky. >> And another brand that I've never heard. of. >> Yeah. Another brand you've never heard. of. Right. >> And it's always in the city that you're. from. >> Tunics Ranch. >> Right. >> Fine. >> So gummy bears is always another one. Got to be. Yeah. There's got to be. And. then one of the variations of nuts, either mixed nuts or or just um or just. uh uh cashew cashews or almonds. >> Almonds. Yeah. Yeah. There's always a. chocolate covered almond thing. sometimes. >> I do love those. >> I do I eat the out of those. So. good. >> What else do they have there? Um. >> Well, it depends on the class level. >> Yeah. >> Cuz sometimes at a high class hotel,

it'll be peanut M&M's, but they'll put. it in a jar. >> So it'll be like not in the bag, they'll. put it in another jar. Just. Yeah. Like this at the wind. >> Yeah. They just put it. They just put it. in something else. >> But and yet you still eat it and it. looks healthier because it's in a jar. [laughter]. >> And then in the jar better for you. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know in Hawaii. what they do is they gave me a fresh. fruit of of fruit. >> Fresh fruit of fruit. [laughter]. >> Sometimes they give you a fresh fruit of. fruit.

>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. If you can get it. And. then when it's through Carlos and um. Gilbert's wife Cindy, right, >> I get I I always open the refrigerator. there and there's Diet Coke, >> water, and sugar-free Red Bull. >> What else do you need? >> Yeah. So, it's like it's like catered to. me, >> which I really appreciate. >> Yeah. I mean, yeah. Yeah. But I think um. I would ra I don't want to be gesture. [panting]. >> What if I left a girl in there for you? >> That That's okay. Good. Now we're. negotiating. >> Yeah, but she's she's 7 foot2. Yeah.

>> And she weighs 385 lbs. >> She's a man. >> It's fine. She's a man. Now, let me ask. you this. [laughter] When you put your. >> It's back to the gay thing right away. >> Yeah. >> Now, >> I took this in Australia. >> I was after you cleared out our mini. bar. >> Passed out and I ate the entire mini. bar. [laughter]. >> I was so hungry. >> We came back. I was like, "Let me in. your room.". >> And I ate their whole mini bar and then. I slept in McCone's bed. [laughter]. >> What did we watch on T? We were watching. a movie. We were watching uh like I.

think Fear and Loathing. >> Oh yeah, we were. >> Wow. Great. >> By the way, you see that bag of chips. next to me? >> Yeah. Gone. >> Gone. >> I peeled off everything in your. mini bar and then I charged my. headphones there. [laughter]. >> Now, how long do you keep the do not. disturb on your door? >> The entire weekend. >> So, you don't let them clean your room. one weekend. >> I don't need it. Just give me new. towels. I just want new towels. Unless. Unless it's if I'm [clears throat]. alone. >> Yeah. >> If my wife's with me, we get service. Yeah, >> but I'm alone. Leave me alone. I keep it. at 65°.

>> Give me new towels. Leave me alone. >> I'm a service hunter. >> Oh, you are? >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm one of those rare. service hunter. >> You want it all the time? >> No. What I do is. >> meet you meet them at the bar. >> You ask. >> What I get is because my do not disturb. sign is always till 3:00 4 p.m. >> Yeah. >> And they stop kind of like they go home. or whatever. So I'll take it off. I'll. go to the front desk and go, "Where are. they? >> [laughter]. >> where are they? >> And they're like, "We have one on floor. three." And I'll go to three.

>> and I'll go to every room to see where. they're cleaning and I'll give them $100. >> to come clean your room. >> And I go, "I'm in room 819." Great. >> Right. Clean clean room, but I'm a. service hunter. >> Okay, let's do the rules then. >> What are the rules? >> If you have the ser if you have service. come to your room every day and you're. doing a three-day stint, Friday night, Saturday, Sunday night, right? Or. Thursday, Friday, Saturday, whatever. >> How much money do do you leave money. every day or at the end of your stay? Do. you leave a tip at the end of your stay? And hold [snorts] on before you answer. >> Okay. I already know the answer, but. >> I know you do, but listen. But it's But.

you're gonna hear why I Pete, >> I'm listening to you. >> Pete, >> Thursday, Friday, Saturday. Do you leave. every night money every day when they. clean or do you leave it at the end of. this day? >> I'd leave it at the end. >> End of the day. And what do you leave, Pete? >> 100 bucks. >> 100 bucks. No matter what, right? >> Yeah, that's the tip. >> What do you do, Mone? >> Uh, >> he asked me for money. Go on, Carlos. >> Cash. >> What do you do? You do every night. >> Oh, no. And the end. >> The end. >> Okay. How much. >> you leave? >> 200. >> No, he doesn't.

>> He's a liar. >> He's a liar. >> I just eat your nuggets. >> Don't [laughter]. eat your nuggets. >> Look at me in the face. Yeah. >> 20 bucks. >> Yeah. Open up your pocket. >> I bet you leave 20 bucks. >> I didn't even know you had to tip them. >> See, that's what I'm saying. Why'd you. lie? >> What the do you mean you don't know. you have to tip them? >> They have a job. >> Oh, I see who you voted for. >> I thought you only tip [laughter]. >> I know who you voted for. I thought you. only tip waiters. >> just that's the only people you tip in. public. >> Okay. >> I tip Here's the thing. If I get up. early to get the breakfast.

>> in in the room. >> No, I go out. >> downstairs. >> Yeah. I get the breakfast. Correct. Right. >> I take it off and and if I go back up. and they already cleaned it, I leave no. tip. >> because I still have to service hunt. then. >> Correct. >> Right. Yeah. >> Yeah. I mean, and service hunt takes a. long time sometimes. Right. Right. But. if they're if I catch them in the act. [clears throat] of cleaning, right, then. I tip. >> Got it. >> Right. But when I actually service hunt, I tip. >> Get it. Got it. >> But if it's already clean, then no need. >> No need. Right. >> Yeah. That's my thing.

>> I do it if I I I only do it at the end. because of this. >> How do you do it? >> I don't want people coming and going. So. there's always a little notepad with a. little pen always on a desk somewhere. and I write, "Thank you so much." And. then if I've acquired something like. this weekend, I left. >> that we got a swag bag of stuff I just. didn't want. I was going to bring it. from a cone, but all the other things. I've given him are where. >> in the backseat of your car. >> I gave him a ton of clothes, new swag. Throws them in his Accord in the. back. >> Yeah. >> Very nice, dude. >> I'm going to not give you anymore. >> I have backups in case I need. >> I'm not going to give you anymore.

You have too much free So then I I. had a backpack, a bottle of tequila, like hats, some clothes, like a like. cool throwover you know, like and. I wrote free if you'd like it. >> Yeah. bottle of tequila of yours, a nice. new backpack, and some baseball caps. >> Yeah. >> And then I And. >> some cash. >> But how much do I leave? >> 20 bucks. >> 20 bucks. [laughter]. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> No. >> 100. >> I leave a hundred. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> I leave 100 every time. Unless. >> Yeah. >> If it's my wife and I. >> Yeah.

>> And I make we make a mess every day. Like there's all over the. place cuz women for some reason set off. a a bomb in the bathroom. >> I I'll leave them a little bit more. I'll do like a buck and a half. You know. what the Ritz does? >> Uhuh. >> They wash your clothes and fold them. >> You have to pay for that. >> No. >> Yeah. Yes, you do. >> I did? >> Yes. [laughter]. >> We did. I'm sure we did it on tour. >> Yeah. I I don't No. When I in Hawaii, >> Bobb's like, "You're not going to. believe this.". >> I put all my clothes in the washer. thinking that later at night I was going.

to wash them. By the time I got home, they had washed it, dried it, and folded. it. >> Yes. Laundry services at the Rich. Carlton properties in Hawaii, Kabo or. Wiki, are very EXTRA COST. OH. [laughter]. >> YEAH, YOU PAY for that. >> and I gave the money. >> Yeah. Well, and then you tipped on top. of the money. >> Okay. Before the internet though. Okay. Before we had internet access, right? >> 40 40 years ago. Yeah. >> 40. Yeah. Yeah. I used to live leave. This is what I used to leave. DVD. players. [laughter]. >> What? In your hotel room? >> In my hotel room. I would write a note. This is your DVD player.

>> What would you just go bought a DVD. player? Cuz you'd buy it at Best Buy to. watch movies in the weekend. >> Not movies. >> Porn. >> Yes. >> Got it. >> Did [snorts] you leave some of the porn. in the in there [laughter] or No. No, I. would take the porn. They're discs, >> right? >> Yeah. I would leave with the disc, but. leave the DVD player. >> By the way, he could have bought porn. from the TV for like 50 bucks. >> Yeah, but they're fuzzy. And there's. five options. >> I know. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Carlos always finds an opportunity to. look up, even though he knows what porn. DVDs look like. >> Yeah. Yeah. He'll look it up. Yeah. >> He just wants to Google it. >> So, I would So, I would go to the local. >> Yeah. Stop. I would go to the local, you.

know, the porn store. I'd buy five or. six discs. I'd go to Best Buy, get a DVD. player. I've also left two Xboxes. [laughter]. >> That's so expensive. >> It's so expensive. Yeah, >> cuz the DVD players probably get for 20. >> Well, no, because my intention was. always I'm going to put in my a. suitcase, but then I try to put in the. suitcase and it won't fit. So, I said, oh, it. You know what I mean? And. I'll just write a note. Here's a brand. new. >> Here's a new Xbox. >> Xbox for you. [laughter]. >> And they must have loved it. >> How much was Xbox in 2007? It was $500. >> Yeah. Yeah.

>> Oh my god. >> And that's what I would get paid for the. gig, too. By the way, $500 back then is. like six grand today. That's crazy, >> dude. This was a crazy moment I had at. the airport here today. Before I came. home, I went to the bathroom when we. landed. >> Yeah. >> And there was a man in the in the room. ch uh changing his bab baby's diaper. >> A. >> And I'm in there taking a piss. And then. I And he turns to me and I go, "Hey, man." He's like, "Hi." And then another. guy walks in to go by me to go piss as. I'm washing my hands. And he's like, "Oh, baby." And the guy's like, "Yeah.". And he's like, "How old's the baby?". He's like real fresh. It's like it was.

like two months or something like that. And he was like, "Oh, so cute." And I'm. washing my hands. And then this guy's. done peeing. Then he goes next to the. man and like stands there and like. watching him change the baby. >> And he was like, "So cute. So cute." And. I could feel the dad being like, "Mhm. >> Mhm. >> I know what that is.". >> What if he's a new dad and trying to. figure out how to put. >> He doesn't know how to do it. >> Diaper on. >> Yeah. Internet, Google it. Don't stare. at another man changing his baby. insane. like boiling the egg for. me. >> We Googled it. Now you know.

>> Yeah. Sometimes the internet doesn't. know. >> No, the internet always knows. The. internet literally knows. >> But Chad HBD told me to do it wrong. >> No. No. You just did it wrong. We follow. the directions perfectly. >> Okay. Well, anyway, although Although. I've never I've although I've never um. put a diaper on a baby before. I already. know how to do it. >> You never changed your friend's kids? >> No, but I I assume I already know how to. do it because I know how the body works. I know there's adhesives on the end. >> Yeah. You're not an idiot. >> Yeah, I'm not an idiot. Right. So yeah, I don't know what the explanation was. >> It was so weird, dude. Even I was wanted.

to turn and be like, "Dude, get out of. here. What are you doing?". >> But Kyla's baby where we're having we're. in the house. >> Yo, you've never changed Kilo's baby. [snorts]. >> No, but he said something that I almost. cried. >> The baby? >> Yeah. The baby was sitting there eating. and I was kind of across the table and. he looks at me and he goes, "Bobby.". >> Wow. >> And he knows my name. >> Yeah, we heard that. Yeah, we fig Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. And it was just like and I. went in and kissed his forehead and he. and then he does this cuz he gets shy. >> but he knows it's you. Yeah.

>> All right, King. Sign us out. Go ahead. It's your birthday. >> Thank you for being a bad friend. >> Cute. Woo. Woo.