Bobby's Missed Connections | Ep 296 | Bad Friends

You two are bad friends. >> Who are these two idiots? >> A white dude and an Asian dude. >> You two are disgusting. >> Well, you two are something. >> We're bad friends. >> Well, look at who's back. >> Hello. >> Look who's back. >> Hello. >> Hello, Porks. [laughter]. >> You know, it was really good to see you. when I walked in the into the studio. Um, >> I fell off. >> Did you really? >> No. >> I held you twice. [laughter]. >> I held you twice, >> but with some extra touching. with some. scratchies. I love doing scratchies with.

you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Some nipple. some poor nipple scratchies are good. >> Couple of tickles for the boy. >> Yeah. >> You're back from Espa. >> We had some family time. How are you. feeling? >> Okay. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Happy to be back. >> Are you happy to be back for real? >> Especially because I saw you guys tried. to replace me. >> We [snorts] didn't try. We. >> We did. We did. [laughter]. >> We're very. >> We absolutely did. >> That guy was fantastic. >> We found a wonder kid, dude. [laughter]. >> Yeah. >> He's the best. The big C. >> Dynamic. the big C. Dude, are you. threatened?

>> I a little bit. [laughter]. >> Wow. >> But did you you didn't edit that. episode, did you? No, but George did. And you watched it. Did you watch it? >> I did. >> You did? I know. He watched it like a. sick little weirdo. Just. >> Yeah. >> He's not as good as me. [laughter]. >> There is no way he is as good as me. And. he was, wasn't he? >> He was. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. We we uh we we flew him across the. country just to temporarily replace you. But nobody. >> nobody bad friends. No one can replace. Fancy B. We're happy he's back. He's. back. [applause]. >> Yeah.

>> Also, um, the big seed doesn't really. know what food is. [laughter]. >> I don't think he eats. I. >> Yeah. I mean, everything we brought him. to, um, John and Vinnie's, right? >> Yeah. >> And everything was like, I don't like. it. >> Yeah. >> Well, the first thing you brought out. was was like a barata or something. And. he had no [ __ ] idea what that ever. seen bara before in his entire life. >> He thought it was a dead ghost. >> Yeah. [laughter]. Is that an old ghost? >> Yeah. >> And we had Oh, he hated the gem salad. Tell, >> by the way, it's just lettuce. [laughter].

>> It's a Caesar salad. >> He hated it. >> With a little spice in it. >> So good. >> Yeah, he didn't like that. And then um. what he did like was the anchovi pizza, which is strange. >> He loved it. >> No, there was no cheese on it. Just red. sauce and an anchovi stripped across it. >> And he liked that. >> He was like, "That one is pretty cool.". [laughter]. >> I was like, "The fish pizza is good. You. don't like any of the other pizza?" He. didn't like the hagelli. He didn't like. the the He didn't like the He didn't. like the Bronx bomber. The meat. >> He's never had real pasta, I think.

>> No, he's never had. >> I think it's a little too chewy for him. or something. [laughter]. >> He He went like this. >> Yeah. Yeah. Like. >> like a horse like trying to get rid of. something. >> And then and then the embrace afterwards. were words was as if we were never going. to see him again. >> Well, we're probably not. [laughter]. >> Yeah. >> No, you know, we do we I will say this. We do really. >> I don't want to give anything away to. the fans. We are We do love the Big C. We like the Big C. >> We will see him again. >> I hope so. >> We love him. >> Yeah, he's uh unique. >> He's.

>> We got to get him some, you know, >> what. >> some action, I think. [laughter]. >> Well, I mean, he he's 3 what? One, 32, and then he hasn't had since Dominican. Republican had in high school. >> 13 years, >> which I don't even believe. Do you. believe that story or No, [laughter]. >> I don't think he's really had sex. >> Come on. >> Come on. What? >> Of course that's not real. He's never. had sex. He went into a vivid detail. about how it happened. >> Yeah, he's been. >> how she ran away. How she ran away. afterwards [laughter] and ran into the. forest. >> She was able to cut the ropes and.

>> escape into the woods. [laughter]. >> And I was chasing her. >> Come back here, little girl. >> Yeah, it was a wild story. [laughter]. >> He had an elaborate story because he. because he's been broached with this. subject many times. People have said, >> uh, you know, he's been around another. guy that's like, "Hey, you know, you. working on anybody right now? You got. anybody on your roster? No. No, not. really. I had sex once in Dominican. [laughter]. >> I think it's like it's not like. >> You know what? Let's not make fun of.

that. >> I'm not We're not making fun of. >> Let's go backwards. I'm proud of him. because he's saving himself for real. love. >> That's what he said at dinner. He said. he wants he wants to meet real love. >> I think that's what they all say. [laughter]. >> Well, dude, >> they all say that, right? >> It's either we take him to John and. Vidies or [laughter]. >> Oh, that's true. THAT'S TRUE. >> YOU ARE YOU ARE SCREWED TO ME. YEAH, it. did have feel that like we should be. extraized now. >> Yeah. I don't want to. >> cuz we don't know. We don't know. >> I don't want to read about a Westfield. mall in Jersey getting [ __ ] lit up. >> Oh my god. That would be that would be. the end of our podcast.

>> He's wearing a Bad Friends merch shirt. [laughter]. >> No. TMZ. Did you see the mug shots of the guys. that robbed the Lou? >> No. >> This is unreal. >> Look at how hot these guys are. >> Are you. >> I'll be the judge. >> Is this a movie? Well, that's Chase. Crawford on the left. [laughter]. >> No, but they're saying he looks That's. him on the right. >> That guy. >> Wow. >> Look at his Oh, he's hot. >> Welcome to Hollywood. >> They're going to cast this guy as soon.

you know what someone is going to bust. him out of jail and put him in a movie. >> Yeah. >> Remember the model? Remember like the. hot model that was. >> He's on like Tuby on like black stuff. >> We should make a movie. I got it. We. bust him out. Manion. >> Mhm. >> Right. >> Yeah. Yeah. You mean with the two. brothers with the Boston that was the. young brother from the Boston Marathon? What's his name? >> Sarna. >> We'll leave that guy in there. [laughter] Yeah. >> Well, he's cute though. >> I know. >> Bring him. Is he? >> Yeah. Jeremy Meeks. >> He's already an actor now. >> He's famous, right? He got like f He got. like famous. >> Okay.

>> But go back to the mug shot of the guy. that robbed the Lou. I can't I mean, honestly though, look at that guy's. face. >> Yeah. >> That guy's a thief. >> Yeah. Look at the neck proportions. >> How easy would it be for this guy to get. an older woman who's rich to give him. money, brother? Right. >> You don't need to rob. >> Yeah. >> You don't This What does it say? This is. one of the two. Right. That's one of the. two. What's he Where's the other guy? Is. the other guy? They keep showing him. So, obviously the other guy is not uh. >> No, he's he's sexy, too. >> Yeah. >> Is that Big C? [laughter] I went to.

Paris to rob the lube. I stole Mona. >> Why is that happening? Hawkeye's doing. this. >> Why are hot guys robbing? >> Yeah. When you you look at Kyle. Writtenhouse, >> Hollywood's dead. You're like, you you. get it, right? >> Yeah. >> You look at written house, you're like, yeah, but when hotties are doing it, what's going on with our world? >> It's diversity, you know, it's killing. that stuff. >> This is DEI, >> right? >> DEI is like enough ugos. We need to. start getting hot guys to rob, >> right? >> This is the this is the [ __ ] this is.

the lib contingency at it again. >> Oh my god, they're hot. So, are they in. trouble? >> A little bit. >> Yeah. [laughter]. Uhoh. >> They used a crane to like. >> But they didn't kill anybody. >> They didn't do it. No, they didn't do. it. Yeah, that crane company is from. from Germany. Their ads is like, you. know, in and out faster than whatever. Like they're selling through the roof. >> Well, you might as well market. Use the. marketing. These guys stole a crane and. then they hoisted uh the ladder up to. the window. Dude, it was in it's in. broad daylight. I mean, it was like in. the middle. You can see it. It's not. like it was like hidden and sneaky. They.

just put the crane up to the window, walked in, and came out. >> And so they they got the merch. >> They got merch? Yeah. >> Well, I mean, not merch, but they got. what at the Lou? What? They got. paintings and stuff. What is No, just. jewels. >> Jewels. >> They got jewels. >> or Rudy jewels. They stole. >> and then they and [laughter]. >> she was in there. >> Then they got out. >> and they escaped. >> and they escaped and then the they they. caught him. >> But some rat somebody ratted him out. >> Oh, the rat. Who's a rat? Google the. rat. >> Google the rat. >> Yeah. >> Wait, wait, wait. Go back. I'm sorry. I. want to see that real fast. It says the. heist is valued at 88 million. That's.

102 million American. >> Wow. >> Eight pieces of historic French jewelry. [ __ ] the French. Who cares? No. We love. the French. We love the French. >> He came this close to getting away. >> I know. That's amazing. >> I would They should have let him go. >> I would start small if I wanted to rob. >> What would you rob? >> Well, I would start like back in like my. high school days like Kit Kats and you. know what I mean? >> Oh, yeah. Yeah. >> And then you would you would slow, okay, I got away with that. And then the next. thing you would rob is like shoes from. Pay Less Shoes or something. >> Yeah. [laughter]. >> Right. Like I got loafers.

>> By the way, that's why they went out of. business. [laughter]. >> Oh, yeah. Yeah. >> Everyone stole from that place. Oh, the. next one is, you know, if you go to like. San Francisco, you went to the CVS where. everything is locked up now. >> You think I went into a CVS in San. Francisco? I went from my hotel to the. club to the hotel to the club. >> Oh, I went to a CVS. >> I did not walk outside. >> Yeah, we were both in San Francisco and. the CVS, you know how in LA half the. things are locked up [laughter] at. [ __ ] San Francisco CVS, right? >> That's all. >> Toothpicks locked up. >> Well, those are weapons. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> That's how they broke into the Lou.

>> Yeah. I mean, everything. >> Yeah. But but I will say the city. >> Ben Gay locked up. Well, I buy a lot of. Ben. I'll tell you this. >> It's funny locked up up there. >> What? Chips. Yeah. It's crazy. And then. there's so many of those buttons. >> Who loves chips? >> I wonder. >> All of us. >> Yeah. >> We all love chips. >> Yeah. And then there's one person, some. poor Filipino lady, where you have to, >> she just happened to be where, you know, you're pressing the button, >> but you have to imagine there's 40. buttons being pressed throughout the.

[ __ ]. >> She's the key master. [laughter]. >> She's got 50,000 keys around her neck. just running through the [ __ ] like, Yeah. What about this? Why don't you. just get one guy per aisle? >> Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, hey, dude. I'm the [ __ ] you know what I. mean? Deodorant guy. >> I'm the cereal boy. >> Yeah, you'll be serial. I'll be. deodorant. And I have all the deodorant. keys, >> right? Mone, I don't know what you would. do. >> Okay. Uh, [laughter].

>> what's going on? Are you stunned by. what's going on? >> I thought he was going to tell me what I. was going to do. >> No, he's he doesn't. >> I was giving you the OB. I'm the CVS. [ __ ] manager. I go, what do you want? What do you want to do? Like, what aisle. do you want? >> I do the condoms. >> Oh, [ __ ] Okay, give him the condoms. Why? Because you don't use them. >> Yeah, >> it'd be fun to monitor that one versus. the other ones. [snorts]. >> Keep an eye. to mone in love. I uh was introduced to. a new friend of his recently. >> It ended later that evening. [laughter].

>> Never mind. >> Wait, you found love and then you ended. it? >> Well, I met up. We went to the Dodger. game and uh we afterwards I said, "Hey, we're going to walk down the hill. because you can't get a [ __ ] Uber." I. was like, "We're going to walk over the. hill and probably go to shortstop or. grab a beer, just hang out.". >> And then so we went to Little Joy and I. said, "Come meet us." And this guy, this. is how nervous he was in front of this. girl. I haven't seen him like this in a. long time. I was pretty hammered. And I. was just giving him cash. Just handing. him cash like get her a drink. Get her. go get her food. And he was nervous. I. could tell cuz when he showed up late, I. go, "Where did you go?" He was late. He.

goes, "I thought you said little boy.". I'm like, "There is no little boy. There's no little boy bar, dude. There's. little joy." And it's literally across. from your house. >> Wow. You know what I did? What you. >> on the flight to San Francisco? There. was a attendant, a flight attendant. She. was beautiful. So I wrote her a letter. >> Oh my god. >> Oh yeah. >> Restraining order now. [laughter]. >> No more Delta flight. >> The guy next to me. [laughter]. >> Fancy is back. >> Yeah. I was sitting next to the a.

businessman. I go, "Excuse me, sir. Do. you have a pen?" He's like, "Yes, young. man. I have a pen." Gives me the pen. So, I take the um you know the throw up. bag, >> barf bag, >> the barf bag, >> barf bag, love note, >> right? And I wrote this like you're so. pretty and you know here's my number, this and that. My Instagram, everything, right? >> Yeah. >> Nothing. >> Well, did you check your requests and. all that stuff? >> I checked it. I've been checking it for. days. [laughter]. >> Nothing. >> But did you get her name? Was her name. on her name tag? >> No. >> Nuh-uh. See, that would have been a that. would have been.

>> I I looked at the You know, when you do. DMs, you're not a single guy, but I know. I I you go through it. You know what I. You siphon through all. >> I siphon through all the the the profile. p pictures. Yeah. >> Nothing. >> Yeah. >> You know, and you take a risk like that. But it was she was so pretty, Andrew, that I had to take a risk. >> That's really She must have been This. must She must have been a smoke show. >> She was a smoke show. >> What airline are we talking? >> Alaska. [laughter]. >> Oh no. >> Was she Alaskan? >> No, she was just a a white girl. She was. so attractive and I thought, you know, I.

mean, you know, she smiled at me and. this and that. You know, listen up, Alaska Airlines. >> Wait, wait, wait. >> You didn't talk to her. You just wrote. her a letter. That's like high school. stuff. Like, >> wow. [laughter]. >> And I put check mark like check boxes. like, "Do you like me?" Yes or no. That. doesn't work. >> Self-sabotage. >> Yeah. And and that thing with the hand. thing with [laughter]. prom with me. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. She u. >> Well, Alaska Airlines, this is easily. huntable. Anybody out there that works. for Alaska, there's a flight out of.

Burbank that goes to SFO. I she didn't. find me attractive. >> Sure she did. You're very attractive. >> No, there's lots of rich famous guys in. First Class and Bobb's just one of them. So, she has a pick. >> Um. >> Oh, that could be it. >> She's getting a lot of barf back love. >> Exactly. [laughter]. >> She got a stack of barf bag love at the. end. >> Yeah. I mean, you you you I mean, right, would you take a risk like that or no? >> No, because I feel like you'd be called. like lame or something in a group text. after. >> Oh, so what? You're departing the plane. There's no time to talk.

>> They're at work. It's not time to talk. to girls. >> So you can you can never see it again. >> No, you you got to. >> You think people don't You think that. never happens? >> I don't want to be a part of that. >> That's You're not interested. >> No, I don't want like to be made fun of. in public or someone like film me like. look at this guy asking this girl out. I'm afraid. >> you don't want to end up on a TikTok. >> Yeah, that's scary. >> Okay, so I'm a flight attendant. >> Exactly. >> Get ready with me while I talk about a. creep my grape [laughter]. >> and then they do a breakdown of it. >> Yeah, I know what you're I've seen. I've. watched I've lit there's flight. attendants who do Tik Toks and I I see.

them sometimes and they talk. >> Tik Tok my [ __ ] barf now. >> Oh yeah. Yeah. >> Oh my god. That'd be so embarrassing. >> But you didn't say anything. You all you. said was I I find you a Well, what did. you say? >> I drew a very detailed You know what I. mean? >> Swastika. >> No. Of my penis. [laughter]. >> No. No. And so here cuz 15 years ago I. was I don't know what airport I was in. but I was sitting there and this lovely. lady sat next to me and I think this is. before I met Kyla and we had a.

conversation and she was very pretty. >> Yeah. >> And very nice and I never got her. information. I always felt I think about. that. >> and then sometimes you know you'll run. through the airport you'll just see some. of you guys you'll lock eyes with a girl. you'll smile. >> and you're like oh that's a missed. opportunity and so from now on I don't. want to miss those opportunities if I if. I feel like. >> that's cool. >> take them shoot that shot that shot. >> what you're smiling I don't like it. [laughter]. >> well I'm just saying without your.

glasses that you don't have right like. you don't see that well like two two. feet apart. >> [laughter]. >> So, I don't know if those smiles that. you see are directed at you, you know, [laughter] or you're imagining them. >> You do have [laughter] tremendously dog. shed vision. >> You think everyone's smiling at you. [laughter]. >> Everywhere Bobby goes. >> Dude, that made me so angry. [laughter]. >> It's so It makes me so angry. I don't.

know what it is. I mean, welcome back, but I don't know, dude. You know, [laughter]. >> why don't why don't why don't you look. up misconnections cuz I guarantee you. >> there's there's a misconnections. website. >> You know, is is that Craigslist that. does it? >> Yeah. >> Starbucks in Santa Monica. Let's zoom. in. I am the Asian female that was. hesitant but talked briefly over coffee. about a month ago if around and still. interested. Love to have coffee again. This is like wildly sad. It's it's. beautiful but sad as [ __ ]. >> This is what I'm talking about. This is. why you have to seize the moment, you. know? And maybe I am blind and I can't.

see the smile, [laughter]. okay? But it doesn't matter because. maybe one of them are a smile. You know, >> looking for Sarah from Pasadena, I. think. >> Hard. We should respond to some of. these. Yeah, >> we should just be Sarah. Well, you look, you got to shoot your shot. >> Yeah, >> you're single and free. You got to keep. shooting your shot until you find love. And it's out there. >> Yeah. >> Could it be on Alaska Airlines? Maybe. >> this guy needs to apologize. >> Asking the Italian girl of my dreams for. an opportunity to apologize in. Lancaster. My only sin was to love you. too much. I miss how it used to be. You.

never You're never alone. I'll always be. there if you need me. I still love you. >> Oh my god, these are so heartbreaking. >> Well, it's even sadder. It's that it's. on Craigslist. I don't Do people use. Craigslist heavily now? I don't think. anybody uses that anymore. >> Facebook Marketplace took it over. >> That's exactly what it is. >> There's a lot of love loss and. misconnections in this world right now. >> Well, how do we how do we mend that? How do we mend it? >> I don't know. >> I'll tell you where there's a lot of. love. San Francisco. Holy [ __ ] man. Those gays go [ __ ] bananas. They have.

they have the most fun. I got hit on a. bunch. >> I gotten hit on not one time while I was. there. [laughter] I And I was out. >> You got no guys. >> I get no gay love. No, >> I I sit up at the bar to have dinner and. I'm. >> Oh, yeah. I didn't go to any bars. >> No, at dinner. I had dinner at the. restaurant. But I mean the hotel bar. >> There's another thing that happened. I. have a couple things that happened, but. another thing that happened was I I get. a text from some random number saying, "Hey, can you speak at my meeting?". >> That's cool. >> Right. So I go I didn't I ignored it and. then you know what I mean he was kind of.

you know persistent. >> so I said okay I'll do it you know and. so I show up and so there's this one guy. in the in the program he's a the biggest. rock star right and he he's a guy that. I've met for the last 20 years he has no. idea who I am it's almost you know how. you meet somebody and it you have they. act as if they've never met you before. >> you've met them a bunch. >> yeah I mean I've I've been introduced to. Um, but it it just I mean he's an older. rock legend.

>> Okay. >> And so now I'm speaking at this meeting. and he's sitting there with his wife in. the second row. He's never seen me talk. really. And I have a 30 minutes. I'm the. main speaker, right? And so I'm like, all right, I'm going to, you know, >> you're doing some time. >> Well, but you know, I was like, I I got. I I got to hit this. >> Yeah. >> You. >> What's your What's your opener? >> My opener? It's so cheesy. I I I CAN'T I. DON'T WANT TO DO IT BECAUSE HERE'S the. thing is is that I have to um.

>> for the fans. >> I will. So what you're doing is. >> it's not just you can't go up there. because there's this other comic that. spoke once and he did his act literally. [laughter]. >> You know what I mean? >> Tit his standup and he lost the room. Half the people walked out. >> and people [snorts] you know a lot of. people know I'm a comedian. So it's like. you can't go in like and try to be. funny, >> right? >> So [snorts] you start with real. >> So. >> yeah. So I start I said I just first. thing is I say you know I have to say. that AA is the greatest thing that's. ever happened to me.

>> True. you know, and um when I was 17. years old, I um luckily got, you know, a. spiritual awaking or psychic change, >> you know, and um and then I move on from. there, you know, I mean, about helping. others and this and that, right? And but. then I go into I know my. my my you know, pitch is it I can get. funny. >> You can talk about my parents and stuff, right? >> Right. So, I do start doing acts, you. know what I mean? [laughter] You know. what I mean?

Did you just do. and I'm doing it and I'm doing pretty. good. >> Yeah, >> it's like 350 people there. 300 people. >> It's a big It's a big AA meeting. I look. over and the guy's. >> Oh, he's [laughter] he's dead. >> I I could He looked like he was dead. >> Yeah. Yeah. And I'm like, ah. >> He didn't hear a word you said. >> Yeah. But anyway, um yeah, he But you. know, I um my fantasy would be, you know. what I mean? you know, come over [laughter] to my.

house. You know what I mean? >> Come over. >> Yeah. >> To the house. >> Yeah. And then he, you know, and then. it's like, you know, here's an original. sign, you know, whatever. I don't know. And you're like, thank you. Thank you. You know, >> you'll get I think you keep, >> you know, I want to have that moment of. like you like you and Taylor Swift, [laughter]. >> you know, like he says something funny. and I'm [laughter] like. very funny. I want that photo. [laughter]. >> Everybody wants that photo, right? Of.

just you and Obama or somebody. [laughter]. >> Well, you had a redemption with another. rock legend the other night at the. comedy store. >> Oh, that's I had another redemption. >> Who? >> I think I could say it. >> Ketus. >> Kus. >> You redeemed yourself with Anthony. >> Yeah. >> Like now he's you're back in his good. graces. >> Did you speak to him for a while? >> Yeah. >> Ah. >> Oh, yeah. >> And it was magical. >> He gave you a signed copy of something. [laughter]. >> No. take over. >> But but I I almost went like this. [laughter].

>> Almost. But [laughter]. >> you think that's You think that's good? >> Domino's. Hey man, you know what, dude? >> What? Baby, >> I love two things in life. >> Let me guess. >> Specialty things. >> and pizzas, right? I knew it. What do. Domino's dominoes do? >> Do they do specialty pizzas? >> They do both. >> Are you serious? >> A combo, dude. And check it out, dude. What? >> Look at this red box here. >> Delicious. >> You eat. You know what it is?

>> What? >> Extravaganza. >> Is that an extravaganza? >> It's an extravaganza. I already took a. bite here. I already had a piece, but. I'm going to have another bite of this. extravaganza. >> This extravaganza, >> a super loaded deluxe pizza with. pepperoni, ham, Italian sausage, beef, fresh onions, fresh green peppers, fresh. mushrooms, black olives, all sandwiched. between two layers of proolone and. cheese made with 100% real mozzarella. >> I'm drooling for a bite right now. I'm. drooling. Now, >> I got a couple of really good pizzas on. my table right now. And this one. especially, this is a. >> Is that what I think it is? >> That is the spicy chicken and bacon.

ranch. Ladies and gents, this thing is. phenomenal. I love jalapenos, especially. because I like a little spice and a. kick. And they drizzle with a little. buffalo sauce. Of course, it's made with. 100% real mozzarella. Um, and in here. they got that grilled chicken breast, smoked bacon, and jalapenos. Probably. one of my favorite combinations of food. layered on delicious crispy crust. Ooh, dominoes. You know they have other ones. You know Wisconsin. >> Oh. Oh my god. They have the Wisconsin. one. They got the six cheese. The. Wisconsin six cheese. And also your.

favorite city, Memphis. Memphis barbecue. chicken. >> Wow. And a wakalaiki. >> The wakaliki. You know what? You know. what we got? We got Halulu Hawaiian. >> Honolulu Hawaiian is up there as well. >> The Pacific Veggie dude. >> They got so many different kinds of. Dominoes now between the spinach and. feta, the extravaganza, the mita. They. also got yo Philly cheese steak, dude. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, use over there. Go get. a Philly Hogy cheese steak. They got the. Philly cheese steak pizza. Delicious. So, if you're at home and you're hungry, get yourself some Dominoes. >> dupe.com. Did you know there's a website.

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awareness month and Talkspace wants to. know how you feel. Guys, this November, prioritize your health by prioritizing. your mental health with Talkspace. >> Can I talk to you, >> please? >> Yeah. Um, every Thursday, you know, we. have the schedule on my therapy. >> You always go to therapy on. >> without places like Talkspace, I'm not. I'm a goner. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. I think it's very important. >> It's extremely important. Therapy can be. costly, by the way. It can be. And thank. God for Talkspace. It's affordable and. in network with most insurance. providers. And we are a big proponent of. talking to someone on this show. And. Talkspace therapy and psychiatry are. covered by many insurance plans, like I.

said. And you can easily sign up online. and get paired with a licensed therapist. who's going to fit your needs well, typically within 48 hours. And you can. always switch providers at no cost. >> Talkspace makes getting help convenient. because you can make your appointments. from the comfort and privacy of your own. home. >> Yeah, that's right. >> You can even talk it out between. sessions by sending texts, video, or. audio messages to your therapist. >> There's more to Men's Health Awareness. Month than just mustaches. Talkspace is. here to help you with therapy on your. terms. As a listener of this podcast, you're going to get $80 off your first. month with TalkSpace when you go to.

talkspace.com/badfriends. and enter the promo code space 80. >> That's space 80 spa ce. >> to match with a licensed therapist. today. Go over to. talkspace.com/badfriends and enter the. promo code space 80. >> And you have a new movie coming out. All. I get the Tik Tok is all his movie. >> What movie? >> The magic movie. Every. [snorts and clears throat] other ad is. the magic movie that you're in. >> You're in the movie. Yeah, you are in. the magic movie. >> I'm in one scene. >> You're in the movie. >> and then you disappear. [laughter].

>> You're on fire. >> He's good. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. [laughter] Yeah. >> Yeah. I'm in one's [ __ ]. >> It doesn't matter. You're in the movie. >> Well, >> and whenever I see that, I go, "My boys. in this. [clears throat] I'm so proud of. him.". >> Shut up. No, >> I'm being really I'm real. That's good. Elite stuff. You know how little movies. are being made, right? And for somebody. in our ecosystem, [snorts] a standup, you know what I mean? An actor that gets. into anything is a big deal. Let's have. a Come on, man.

>> Thanks, man. >> Step into your glory, dude. What happens in it? What do you think? >> In the movie. >> Yeah. >> Now you see me. >> Yeah. >> And now you don't. I pop in and I pop. right. >> Are you a patron? What is it? You I. mean, you didn't send an NDA. You can. talk about your role. Uh, well, I'm in the crowd and I'm. yelling at. um I'm yelling at them on stage. They're. all on stage. Eisenberg. Uh, >> Woody. >> Woody and uhgan Fisher. No, Morgan's not.

there. >> Yeah. >> And Isa Fisher. >> Isa Fisher. >> Yeah. The Woody was. >> Well, talk to me about um Can I. >> Woody would The coolest thing was. meeting Woody. I was fascinated. I'm. just I wanted to meet him so bad. >> Did he know who you were? >> No, no, no, no, no. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> No, but he but but the director. introduced me. He's like, "Oh, he's a. comedian." Wood. He's like, "I love. comedians." And he's like, he does a. podcast and he's like, "I have a. podcast." I was like, "Yeah.". >> And then he was like, "Did you say that. your podcast does better numbers. [clears throat] or [laughter]. >> than his?". >> Yeah. I mean, does it? >> I checked on YouTube. Does it? >> No, I I didn't look it up. I actually. have no idea. I don't Does he do Does he.

have a pot or is he just starting it? >> But he was just talking about the world. He's fascinating. Oh, yeah. Him and him. and um him and Ted Dancing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Um I don't know. Rad dude. Very nice. guy. I'm I'm more broken up right now. because uh my boy got his title stripped. away. My good friend. >> Good to be. >> Prince Andrew. They [laughter]. >> Good one. >> They took it away, man. >> Good one. Let's go back to the movie. now. That was a really good deflection. I can't do.

>> No, but I I see what you're trying to. do. You want to go this way. >> I have nothing to I No, I have nothing. to say about the movie. It was fun. I. mean, I'm in one quick scene. It was. awesome. I mean, it was in Budapest. We. talked about We talked about going to. Budapest. It was great. I'm going to see. it. I'm gonna I hope it's good. >> Yeah. >> I don't know. I know nothing. This is. one of those things where you touch it. and you leave. I don't I have no idea. I. get in there and then they're like, "Thank you. Goodbye.". >> Although Budapest film crew, probably. the best film crew I've ever worked with. in my No, I'm not kidding. >> No, I I know. I did it. >> Shocking. >> They're amazing. >> They're so [ __ ] good. >> They're so great. >> They're on top of everything and you're. like, "Oh, I don't need that.".

>> Hot, too. Some of them. >> Yeah. Some of even some of the girls, too. But it was they were really No, it. was a great time. But yes, I'm going to. go see the. >> beautiful architecture. >> Hope people go see it. Some of it, half. the city is, the other half is in ruins. >> It's in ruins. Yeah. But, um, >> I'm more concerned about all these. Japanese bears getting loose. I was. thinking about you the other day. I. wanted to call you. >> Yeah. I've been seeing that. Like. >> they're overtaking Japan. >> Yeah. >> Brack bear everywhere. That's the. headline. >> I wonder why. >> Cuz they're not having as many children. now. I think they're overpop populating. because they're not being controlled. There's no hunters. So, they're they're.

I think they're inviting hunters to come. help. >> Why kill them? >> Because they're killing people. >> I know. But just ga can you gather them. up and then put them in an area a fenced. in area where this is black country. Black bear country. [laughter]. >> German. This is Baltimore. >> Frodis lived. Yeah. >> Well, I'm just saying like create a. town. You know what I mean? >> A town for black bears. >> All the black bears go there. >> Yeah. >> And you stay there.

>> Yeah. Don't drink out of the white bear. fountain. [laughter]. >> Right. >> According to the Japan Times, 12 people. have been killed. More than a hundred. others are injured nationwide just this. year alone. >> Wow. >> It's pretty crazy. >> Yeah. Wa. That black black bears are. gnarly. Look at that. >> And they're getting more aggressive. >> Yeah. >> Like I apparently they're they're. showing up and like trying to get into. people's houses. [laughter]. >> It's it's [ __ ] rad. Japan's hunter. population has been shrinking. People. don't hunt. 60% of licensed hunters now. are over 60. So there's no kids are. doing it. >> Yeah. I would just gather them up and.

bring them somewhere. Like there there's. there's other islands around, right? Hey, you put them on boats. >> Yeah, put them on boats and bring them. not in Okinawa. That's a pretty. populated. Yeah, put them on boats. Like. we can call it Amastad. Whatever you. want to do. [laughter] However you want. to do it. >> No. Um, >> put them down to Yeah. Okinawa is they. already did that once. Okinawa, you know. what I mean? >> Yeah. But there's there's probably other. islands around Japan where they can, you. know, I mean, put the bears in, >> cage them. So you think. >> I don't killing animals is not my thing.

>> Yeah, but if they're killing people, you. got to protect, you got to protect your. population. Survival of the fit as well. >> Oh yeah, we have guns. So I guess. >> we have gun. They don't none of your. guns. I mean they do have guns in Japan. but not like this. >> Yeah. Wow. They're pretty big and. they're mauling people. Huh. >> And they don't look Japanese at all. >> Yeah. >> I thought they'd look a little bit more. Japanese. >> Well, why they why can't they just, you. know, get their guy to do it? >> Who's that? Who's their prime minister. or whatever? >> No. >> Huh? >> Oza. [laughter]. >> Release Godzilla. Dude,

>> Godzilla would [ __ ] that thing up. No. We call on you to help us, Godzilla. >> Yeah. Yeah. Or Mothra. I mean, you know, Mothra can. pluck. >> How many bears? >> Stuttering problem. >> AI. How many bears can How many bears. versus Godzilla? How many bears would it. take for Godzilla? >> Yeah. >> I wonder what the I wonder what the. scale would be. No number of normalsized. bears can take out Godzilla. See, you're. right. >> Yeah. He could wipe out probably a. million of them. >> Well, let's get let's let's reenact it.

Let's get him out here. Or Mothra would. be easier because he Mothra can fly and. just pluck them from the ground. >> Pick them out of the sky and throw them. throw them in the ocean. >> and throw them in the ocean. >> Yeah, that's actually smart or. something, you know. >> Well, get on it, Japan. What are you. guys [ __ ] waiting for? >> Don't you know cage those Mothra? They. got to be released. >> Little tiny Japanese. >> When the last time you saw Mothra? >> He's been He's been out. He's I think he. had an injury like an MCL tear or. something. He's been out. He's on. injured reserve. >> Yeah. I want to bring Yamamoto and uh. Otani and with baseball bats and go over. there. >> Congratulations to the Dodgers.

>> Oh yeah, the Dodgers. Incredible. You're. wearing your Dodgers hat today. Go you. >> My It's heartbreaking to see Blue Jays. fans though. I just feel so bad for. them. >> Nope. >> Why? >> USA. USA. USA. USA. >> [ __ ] with us, Canada. >> I know. But you know, they were leading. for all most of the game. >> Yeah, they blew. >> They're in home turf. >> They blew it. >> and they you could just see them just. like just not being able to get over the. line. >> I actually loved it, dude. They I loved. it, dude. It was [ __ ] great. Yeah.

>> Yeah. I I was It was kind of wild to. watch, especially because I was in San. Francisco when they won and SF [ __ ]. hates the Dodgers. >> and the Giants. >> They were so mad. >> So Tuesday, this guy came up to me. He. goes, "Hey, I'm friends with Theo." I. go, "Okay." And he goes, "I'm the new. manager of the Giants.". >> The team manager. >> Yeah. I just got hired. This is my first. year. I'm starting work next week or. something, but I wanted to. >> starting work next week. >> I don't know what it. >> That's not how they talk. >> Yeah. That's. >> is Give me the name. >> Tony. Tony Vitello came to my show.

Tuesday. >> Seriously? >> Yeah. With his girl. >> Wow. >> Yeah. Super nice. I mean, I didn't do. that well, but um Yeah. Tony Vital came. Really nice guy. >> That's [ __ ] rad. >> Yeah. I mean, it's still Taylor Swift, but you know, >> the manager of a bad sports team. >> Not bad. >> Are they bad? >> No, they're okay. >> They're fine. >> Is he It's new. I mean, I told him I go, "You have a shot, right? He can He's a. manager. He can rearrange.". >> Yeah. >> They don't have control. It's m. baseball's money. The Dodgers have all. the [ __ ] money. Soccer is the same.

way. Isn't soccer the exact same way? >> I don't know. >> There's no cap on soccer, right? >> Yeah. >> You guys have a salary cap? No. So, it's. the same thing. So, why are the best. teams the best [clears throat]. consistently? They have the most money. >> Yeah. Salary. >> If there's no salary cap that's that's. why people hate the Dodgers. The Dodgers. spent the most [ __ ]. >> But 12 years ago, Lester City won the. Premier League, right? >> Yeah. >> And they were the worst team. They have. no money, >> right? Yeah, >> they had no um they came from the. championship. straight to the Premier League. No star.

They had Jamie Vardy, which is the one. guy. >> I've seen I've seen that name. I know. that. >> Yeah. And they won the Premier League. >> That doesn't happen in America because. of the refs. It's. >> And we have you have teams like. Manchester City and Chelsea. Roman. Abraovich owns Chelsea. He's like a oil. baron from Russia. I mean, they have all. the money in the world and Leicester. still won. My point being is is that you. can still be a thrifty manager and look. at stats and go, you know what I mean? This kid, I know he's in a he isn't a. household name or you know what I mean,

but I think he's perfect. >> You know what I mean? >> I No, I know what you're saying. I think. that may happen in soccer in baseball. unfortunately now that the the the that. day there was a guy Billy Bean for the. Oakland A's and he kind of revolution. You never see Moneyball? >> No. >> With Jonah Hill and Brad Pitt? You. didn't see that movie? It was [ __ ]. phenomenal. It's great. But it was about. the story of this and what you're. saying. He kind of like an iconic. manager who literally kind of. revolutionized the way you can pick. players and get them young and do but. it's it's a big money game now. It's. it's all [ __ ] It's all money game.

>> That's why people [ __ ] that's why. those guys really hate the Dodgers. Yeah. >> They got the most [ __ ] money. [snorts]. >> And I get it. It was like for years as a. kid the Yankees for me. It was always. the Yankees. I was always like the. Yankees are unstoppable. >> Oh my god. >> $350 million. But this summer, what. Arsenal did was, if I, if I can talk. soccer for a second, >> I'd love it. >> Um, >> and wait, let me [clears throat] ask you. a real question. So, Leicester City, is. that what you said? Yeah. >> So, some of the players, are they from. the area as well? So, they have pride in. >> local. So, so this is a thing that we. don't do anymore either, right? >> Yeah.

>> So, most of these kids are [ __ ] from. elsewhere and you just play with the. team that you play with. The cool thing. about soccer that I love is that you see. these local guys play for their squad. There's city, there's like pride. We. also have a youth program and and um. >> Bio Saka, Ethan Wieri, >> um some of these players are Lewis. Skellyy. They're all Lewis Skellyy's 18. and he's in the main team. >> He plays with the. >> main team in Arsenal. Waneri is 18 19.

plays and they're all from Helland. they're all from the academy and our big. star Pokayaka is from the academy as. well. So it's like they've been there as. kids, >> right? That's pride. There there's. there's semblance of pride. We don't. have that. That's I'm jealous of that. You used to have a player when I was a. kid. >> like you know Jordan was Chicago to us. He stayed in Chicago, >> right? Like some there used to be kind. of a vibe like you you stayed there as. long as you could. Now these guys don't. give a [ __ ] They're going to go. wherever they're going to go. Whoever's. got the best check and that's how it.

goes. That's sad. >> Well, that's just this that's but the. business did that. These guys don't. really have his It's almost like you're. put in a position when the Dodgers. called Show and they gave him $700. million. >> Yeah. >> I mean, how else is he gonna pay for. those gambling? >> But let me ask you a question. So, this. summer, um, Arsenal FC, so Liverpool, right, spent so much money. They got. this guy ESAC and all these guys and. they spent $150 million per player. Jes. cost Isak cost 100 over a hundred.

million pounds. >> Jesus Christ. >> Right. But what Artenna did was he. bought people from leagues that people. were like teams that were like people. were like this summer like 30 million. for that guy, who is this guy? Like he. we bought a defender named Mascara. No. one had really heard of him, >> but he knew. >> and but he knows that he would fit right. into the team. And so now um um Arsenal. has a backup for every position that's. just as good. >> Whereas Liverpool spent two or three.

millions of dollars on two, three, four. players. They don't have the backup, you. know what I mean? And it's it's about. stats and about like you mean what's. gonna work in our system, >> you know? >> Right. Yeah. >> No, I think it's f I think it's. fascinating, >> but but I don't know much about. baseball. So, you're saying that. baseball there's no So, the Dodgers. doesn't have like a youth program. >> Well, they have a farm they have a farm. system, right? We have a farm you have a. farm league. Like you have AAA b you. have a you do have a system, but these. guys are quick to get rid of them and. trade them and especially if they can't. afford them. You know, that would. >> I mean, you don't have scouts.

>> They do. They do. What do they do. >> for to kids? >> Oh, yeah. They scout. >> like 12-y old. >> Oh, yeah. They scout they scout middle. school and high school. >> Then you bring them to the Dodgers Youth. Academy. Do they have that? >> Well, they have Yeah, they do have. training facilities. >> And then you guys live here, >> but most of the time. >> you go to school here. >> That's more a non-American thing. Like. the NBA just started that in India not. long ago. Yeah. >> India. >> Yeah. Cuz they're looking for the next. sevenfooter. >> TO PLAY BASKETBALL, MAN. [laughter]. >> I WANT TO HOOP. I HOPE YOU LET ME PLAY. >> YEAH. YEAH. >> LISTEN, RANJIT, you're 5 FOOT SEVEN.

[laughter]. I CAN BE A CENTER. >> WHY CAN'T I BE A STARTING CENTER? [laughter]. >> It is [ __ ] funny that we all we do. the NBA the NBA has so much money. overseas because like guys like Steph. Curry [snorts] he's probably bigger in. China than he is. I mean he's hu he's. global superstar but like overseas. there's so much money in the NBA. overseas cuz Asian kids [ __ ] love the. NBA. >> We can't sell the NFL to almost anybody. but the NBA you can sell to [ __ ]. everybody. >> Everybody loves I mean it's those guys. go to China. They do like a like Steph.

and those guys, they'll go do like a a. summer camp in China and make like $30. million for like a weekend at camp just. because he's, you know, they're they're. they're massive overseas. I mean, big. here, but still. >> Can I ask you another question about. sports? >> LeBron James, did I ever tell you that. story? >> When I was on a boat in Europe, you met. him? >> No. No. I was a boat in Europe and the. guy's like, "You know LeBron James?" I. was like, "Yeah." He goes, "He will stay. there when he come here. That place he. will stay." I was like, "Is he there. now?" He goes, "Nah, but we will watch.". [laughter].

>> I guess he stays at the same like. mansion. They're like LeBron James. This. is LeBron James. >> Wow. Wow. Wow. >> What did you ask me about basketball? >> No, I want to talk about um cuz now, you. know, I'm really kind of getting into. baseball a little bit this year. >> Love. >> Yeah. I had no idea why it would be. exciting, but now, you know, watching. the World Series and the playoffs and. stuff, I I I'm I get it. >> It's a nerd game, >> but I don't get football. >> I don't expect. >> American football. I and I I I want you. to convince me that it's good. Why is it. good?

>> Well, you know, but baseball is my. number one. So, I can't that's I I agree. with you. But baseball is like soccer in. the fact that like these are all this is. all chess moves. >> Yeah, >> soccer's coordinated chess moves. Baseball is calculated statistical moves. trying to advance players in different. positions to the likelihood of scoring. of positioning. >> Football is that too. It's [ __ ]. awesome. But you like it because you. like you like these little technical. moves and I think that's what you like. Football is more like pure raw athletic. strength and talent and ability going at. each other at full speed as hard as you.

can. >> There is str of course there's strategy. to it. It's hard. I don't know what. selling you on football's tough. You. don't like you don't like violent sports. at all. >> I do. UFC I was a big fan of but you. know what show that I've been watching. on um Netflix everyone I command. everyone in this room to watch it. >> There's show called Physical 100. >> Bring it up. >> But it's Asia, right? Right. Oh, I'm. out. >> So, it's basically um there So, it it. was a Korean Yeah. So, that's the.

Philippine team. >> That's Manny Pacquiao. >> Yes. So, like it's Australia, Indonesia, Korea, Japan, Turkey, right? >> Look at the tits on that guy. >> Yeah. Turkey, um. Thailand, and they're all competing, right? >> Are the Thailand a bunch of lady boys in. there? >> No, [laughter] but No, but I think. Indonesia or Thailand does have a lady. boy on it. It should. >> But it's But the Philippines are making. me laugh. [laughter]. >> Why? >> Cuz Manny's so small. >> He's so tiny.

>> You know what I mean? >> What What is the What is the. competition? What do they do? >> Well, there's only four episodes right. now, but it's basically the first one. was they have these four um platforms, circular platforms, >> right? >> And there's I think eight countries, right? >> Okay. And each so they they basically. there's a gigantic circle and in the. middle of this dirt mount is gigantic. circle. See if you can see these. >> He's he's bringing up right now trailer. >> This is the trailer for it. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> But it's not it's not show cuz they're.

going to show the whole thing. Show Oh. yeah. So you can see the circular thing. right there. >> Right. Right. Right. >> Okay. So you have eight countries in you. have to dominate a circle. >> Wow. >> So the most people on the circle, right? >> Right. If you have like. >> it's king it's king of the hill. >> King of the hill. But it's like how. many? Uh there's 1 2 3. I think there's. five. >> This is rad, >> right? But it's like when you're. watching the first round, you can see. Manny Paco just flying through the. screen. [laughter]. >> Yeah. It's pretty brutal, though. >> Can they punch? >> You can't punch, but it gets pretty.

scrappy, dude. It's a really You can. hold down. >> It's a fun show to watch. Yeah. Yeah, >> I'm in. I'm already in. Fantastic. >> But there's some countries, I mean, that. would just like us. We would just. >> Well, yeah. That's why they don't want. us a part of this [ __ ] We'd bring We'd. get the most lunatic out of our mind. ex-military like just ready to [ __ ]. kill at. >> will. But every team has famous people. on it like you know um so the Australian. team has Robert Whitaker. He's one of. the best UFC fighter. >> You know Whitaker and then um that's. [ __ ] Mongolia. They're badass.

>> And look at Genghaskhan. We call him. Genghaskhan in the middle. Look at they. have Genangghas in there, dude. Look at. him. >> But it's a really fun show, dude. >> Physical 100. >> Yeah, physical 100 Asia. >> Rich, what do you got? Are you from the. future? What? I. >> am a little bit of a futurist. Do you. have a time machine? Where'd you get. that? >> Buddy, that's a Ridge wallet. Ridge. makes one of the most durable, cool, and. also I love the colors. I'm big into the. colorways. This is Hunter Green. I just. named that. I don't know if it really. is, but it looks like Hunter Green, but. Ridge is incredible, man. They're. lighter, they're stronger, they're more. durable, they hold cash and cards, they.

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the bad friend sent you. >> Shopify. Oh, we would not have a. business without Shopify. We love. Shopify. >> We do. They do. They make everything so. simple because they have that point of. sales system. It's a unified command. center for your retail business. It. brings together into storere and online. operations across up to a thousand. locations. And we're lucky because we do. it mostly from the internet. We ship you. guys shirts and hats and hoodies and all. that stuff. And thanks to Shopify, their. POS system makes it so simple and easy. Even Dumbos that produce this show like. Carlos and Mccon and Fancy can do it. In. fact, it's proven based on a report from.

EY business on Shopify's POSC real. results like 22% better total cost of. ownership and benefits equivalent to an. 8.9% uplift in sales on average relative. to the market set survey. >> And here's the deal. Uh acquiring new. customers, it's expensive. It's hard to. do and it costs a lot of money for small. businesses. But with Shopify POS, you. can keep shoppers coming back with. personalized experiences and firstparty. data that give marketing teams a. competitive edge. So you know where your. customers are, what they're really.

looking for, what they're actually. clicking on, and what they're going to. take home with them. >> Get all the big stuff for your small. business right with Shopify. Sign up for. your $1 per month trial and start. selling today at shopify.com/badfriends. >> That's shopify.com/badfriends. Once again, shopify.com/badfriends. >> I don't know, dude. To get you into. football, honestly though, we'd have to. embed you with the team. And your team. left your city and came here, which is. you're here now. >> The Chargers. Well, maybe you could be a. Chargers fan. >> You put it for Tottenham for.

[laughter]. >> Oh, something came out. >> Yeah. >> Oh, that's a that's a tonsil stone. >> Yeah. >> No, don't put it in the art. >> Yeah, I like I like to. >> There's a lot of things. >> fermented. [laughter]. I a zimping burp. >> That was a tonsil stone. >> Yeah. >> Do you get those all the time? >> It's not a tonsil stone, dude. It's. soft. Look. >> Okay. All right. [laughter]. >> [ __ ]. >> It looks like it. >> It does look exactly like a tonsil. stone. >> Small hard deposit. Okay. That's what I thought it was. >> What? >> Tonsil stones. It's just debris that got.

stuck in the in those little like uh. those little hangy things in the back. >> Tonsle stone. Okay. >> Did it smell smell your finger? Does it. smell? >> Yeah, it smells like what I ate. [laughter]. >> It was crab. >> It was crab. >> It's a crab. >> Oh, it's a piece of a crab. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Welcome back. Fancy. >> No big deal. >> No big deal. >> Yeah. Yeah. I I went there. I went to. the [ __ ] crab place last night and it. [ __ ] me up, bro. >> What do you mean? >> The bowling crab. >> It's too much sodium. >> I can't do it. >> It's too much. I just don't like mass. amounts of seafood. >> Yeah. And then you got to get the.

potatoes and the carrots with it. But. it's like. >> and then if you go medium like who when. did fire become a flavor? >> An ele an element should not be a I I. don't ever want to eat a sandwich go. this is um earthy, [laughter]. >> right? >> Have you tried our new wind burger? >> Yeah. Or wind burger. Yeah. Yeah. >> It's delicious. >> When did fire Who likes it? You get. fire. You know what I mean? >> I agree. I hate the taste like when they. do it's a smoky thing. I'm like I don't. want smoke. Smoke tastes like you burnt. it. >> Yeah. >> I don't want smoky anything.

>> Yeah. >> They do that a lot with drinks now too. They smoke on top of a cocktail. I don't. want the smoke. >> Yeah. Or you go to an omaca place, right? They take they slice tuna or. whatever. >> They put it you right on on a wooden. plate, but then they put a thing over it. and they stick smoke in it like cedar. wood. >> I don't like that. >> Yeah. And I'm like I don't. >> I totally agree. I [ __ ] hate that. flavor. I don't I don't know why they do. that. Somebody It's It's a culinary. thing. It's got to be like a cool fancy. culinary thing and then that's that. makes that in the community that makes. it good.

>> Or don't put [ __ ] You know what I. mean? Um caviar on top of salmon. >> You're not the mom and the [ __ ] kids. [laughter]. >> Well, we. >> I don't eat the mom and the kids. >> You've never had chicken and eggs? >> I refuse. It's not the combination. I. can't do. >> No, I'll do it. >> Chicken and eggs. >> I'll have I'll. >> It's mom and baby. >> Yeah, the family's all together. [laughter]. We'll get grandpa in there then. Then. >> might as well. >> Yeah. >> Like I'll take I'll take a a ground. patty of of like meat with uh you know a.

uh a full-grown cow and then it's mixed. with like uh a baby calf. You know, why. not? What's it called again? What's. wrong? Ve. >> ve is delicious. >> I can't do baby anything. >> So you don't you want them full grown. before you eat them. >> Well, I'll be honest with you. Um. there's been a lot of guilt now as of. late of eating meat. >> Why? like Tik Tok algorithms. [laughter]. >> Oh. >> Oh, Lib Talk. He's on Lib. >> We lost him to Lib Talk. >> Yeah. Yeah. And um you know, people just.

raising cows and the cows cuddling with. their owners, >> right? >> You've never seen that? >> No. I mean, I've se I've Yeah. >> They kiss on the lips. I love it. >> Well, then you need to move to India. >> No. Like this. >> They worship the cow. >> Like this. This is like Look at that. Look at that. How many smash burgers. could you make out of that? >> A [laughter] lot. A lot. So many. Yeah, we can make a lot out of that. But I. I've done. >> Look at that. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Those are freerange happy cows. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. You don't feel guilt cuz they're. sentient beings. >> Like the other day I went to your house,

saw your dog. >> Yeah. >> Right. Yeah. >> They have the same human connection. >> There's not enough meat on her though. [snorts]. >> I know. >> She's tiny. That's why I have a tiny. dog. >> Brad Williams would [laughter]. >> I know what you're saying. I get it, dude. I have this I I've had this moral. dilemma before in my mind, but also I I. really love red meat. I like it so much. >> I do too. But it's like, you know what? I can't wait until Let's like grow it. >> Well, they're working. They're doing. that now. What do you mean? We We have. that. >> Yeah. But get to a point where it's like. >> tasting good. [laughter].

>> Yeah. >> Yeah. Get to it doesn't taste like [ __ ]. >> Yeah. Like accessessible, you know? >> But it's all We're all in beta with all. this stuff. Like this [ __ ] home robot. they're pushing out. You know, [snorts]. this. >> Oh, yeah. That thing. Yeah. >> That thing looks like. >> And then you have to have Do you know. what they need to do? >> A GUY TO CONTROL IT. >> YEAH. It's insane. >> Yeah. Why don't the guy Why don't the. guy controlling just do it? >> Do it. I know. This is very dumb. >> Yeah. Look, a guy has to control that. [ __ ]. >> And they want 20K for this thing. Is. that how much it is? >> It's the dumbest [ __ ] thing I've ever. heard. >> I was thinking about getting one. >> I know. >> You know, I love to wait for Optimus.

>> Yeah. >> I'm going to wait until that improves. though. >> Yeah. >> You know what I mean? >> Bobby, would you like me to clean up the. cat poop today again? [laughter]. >> Yeah. >> I don't want to keep asking you, Neo. I. think it's the dumbest. I watched the. video of it. You know what it did that. blew my mind in that one promo video? It. does this. It like wakes up. He's like, "No, load the dishwasher." And then it. goes like this and it looks at its. hands. And that made me go, "Fuck.". Because that's what I do. If I'm like. [ __ ] up on drugs, I always looked at. my hands. >> Yeah. Because you're like, "Oh, where am. I? Who is this? Mine.".

>> Imagine sleeping and then that's Wake. up. [laughter] Look at that. >> Neo, what the [ __ ]. >> I need you to wake up. >> Also, put a mouth on it. >> Yeah. I mean, you did the eyes. What's. How hard is it? >> Just put a mouth. Let me get a little. bit of morning head. We're We are. literally three years away from these. things also being just sexy. It's like. the Neo programmers are like, "Look, sir, they're doing no chores all day. long. [laughter]. >> They've loaded not one dishwasher.". >> We're we're 10 years away from um. probably 20% of the households having.

something like that in the house. >> How many people have a Google device. where you can talk to it and it can play. music or how many have like a Alexa or. whatever? Yeah, >> you do. You do? >> Yeah. Three out of five. 10 years ago, you were like, "What are you talking. now?" 15 years ago. But now in the. future, everything's going to be. automated. You're going to talk to the. microwave. You're going to be like, "My. get the food from the fridge, talk to. each other, and then put it in there and. heat it up.". >> Yeah. >> And by the way, >> yeah, [snorts]. >> going to be rad. Fancy went home to. Spain to go see family. You were gone. for what? What? Two and a half weeks.

>> Yep. Exactly. >> Two and a half weeks. Yeah. Cuz I miss. you every day. I have it on my calendar. Fancy gone. Fancy gone. Fancy gone. Fancy gone. I We did miss you like. crazy. I texted you a few times to see. how much I missed seeing you. I finally. joined um Bobby's club. [snorts]. >> What is that? Oh. >> yeah, it's a tough one, man. >> Yeah, >> it's I still um at times I'll just think. about them, you know. It's it's so. surreal that they're no longer with us. >> Yeah. The worst thing was the. bureaucracy of death. You know,

>> the bureaucracy of death. >> Yes. That's insane. >> It's a great band. >> Yeah. [laughter]. >> It really is. >> It's a great band. >> Bureaucracy of death. so much stuff. >> There's so much [ __ ] that comes. along with death. >> Oh yeah. >> Yeah. And it's also a racket is what. you're like the amount of money that. happens when people die. The amount of. It's just It's [ __ ] It's a racket. >> It's crazy. >> Birth, wedding, death. The three best. best businesses you can get into cuz it. will never go away. >> Yeah. >> If you want the most secure job in the. world, do births, weddings, and deaths. You will never not have work forever.

And they can and they [ __ ] people over. They rip them off. Oh. >> yeah. Everything was like that. Like my. dad wanted to be cremated like like. yours and we have to still pick a um. coffin. >> Wait, why? >> Exactly. That's what I asked. Well, because that's how it is. They're not. going to cremate it by itself. So, you. have to buy and they show you. You don't. know the prices. It's like how long is. it going to be there? Like just to go. through the thing. >> Wow. So, so basically they're like you. have to pay for the coffin for them to. be in it while they while they burn it,

>> right? >> God, that's [ __ ] crazy. But. everything was like that. Insane. >> Yeah. >> And do you have the ashes? >> Yeah, I do. >> Do you want to mix ashes with me? [laughter]. >> It's not a bad idea. >> Yeah. Yeah. I still have better mix. better. >> You get a Spanish Korean goat. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. [laughter]. >> What would happen though? What would. happen. >> if you to their souls? Yeah. Oh, >> they probably they would just bump into. each other. >> They don't even know each other. It' be. freaky. Just. >> merge in the after. you. [laughter].

Yeah. Yeah. >> Where would you love to spread your. dad's ashes if you had. >> like some place in Italy, you know, a. place he loves? Some My dad was an art. history uh professor, so something in. that world. >> That's [ __ ] cool. >> Like anything Italian like over an olive. garden. Can we do that? [laughter]. >> We go back to Johnny Vinny's if you got. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> We can sprinkle your dad over the gem. sap. >> My budget is tight, so Yeah, maybe. >> Do you want to be burned? >> Yeah. >> Okay. >> Yeah. My grandfather uh who was like my.

literal hero I've talked about on the. show. He always he always was like land. is for the living. He would go past. cemeteries. He'd be like this is [ __ ]. [ __ ] It's a [ __ ] way. It's like. you don't need to. No one is immortal. Land is for the living. Get out of here. Let the next people have the land. >> Why do you why do you have to plot land. and be like. >> I mean I grew up like having to go to. the cemetery and like you know people. like it's a little surreal like cleaning. the. >> Oh yeah. >> Now did your some people have a stone? They have a tombstone. Do your dad. Does. he have one? >> No. No. No. My dad didn't want any of.

that. >> Your dad's the [ __ ] man. >> I'm going to go old school. Barry. >> Barry. Yeah. >> Yeah. Right. I mean, >> just in case. >> And just in case it's [laughter] like, what if McCon wants to visit me? >> No. No. We But here's what you do. You. take the ashes, you spread them in a. place that means meaningful to you that. you can visit often and then you see. them all the time. >> But your little tidbits and ashy bits. are all over the [ __ ] place. What I'm. saying is is that my body will be in a. place. >> your body will be your body will be. gone. It'll be gone before you even. before anyone It's gone. It's You're not. there anymore. >> You'll rot through the coffin.

>> You'll You'll rot through to the coffin. The bugs and the things will get in. there. They eat you. It dissipates into. almost nothing. There's not There'll be. nothing left. God, it's so depressing. >> I think it'd be cool to be buried just. no coffin and actually just decompose in. the earth. >> Yeah, that's Well, they do that, dude. They do those raps. Those They're called. like eternal uh what are they called? It's. >> tree. I'm gonna do a tree one. Yeah. >> The famous actor did it. There was a. famous actor that did that, right? that. he or he said cuz he got cancer that he. wanted to do it. But it's like an. eternal they wrap you in this. biodegradable thing and you kind of go.

back into the earth and it's all that's. [ __ ] rad. That to me is very cool. >> Yeah, just burying a body is illegal. This is. >> Wait a minute. Seriously? >> Like a felony? >> I mean, you can't if you die, you can't. just bury McCone in your backyard. >> I'll be right back. [laughter]. Oh, dude. Speaking of that, this is. [ __ ] crazy. They just found in Vegas, did you see that? 200 plus bodies or. something buried in Vegas like casino. casino. I know they finally found. >> Wow. >> They finally found what was a funeral. home. It was a funeral home that did it.

>> Now they're pinning it on a funeral. home. >> A funeral home recovers 300 plus piles. of human remains outside Las Vegas. >> What do you mean a funeral home took the. bodies and buried it? >> No, they're. >> What do you mean? >> There's a federal investigation, Zuman, who d federal investigation on into who. dumped more than 300 piles of human. remains. I think a funeral home did it. >> But why would they do that? >> Uh, it's probably cheaper than paying. for the because there's got to be some. sort of I bet you it's expensive to. remove human remains. There's probably a. fee. And they were like, "Fuck this. We'll just throw it in the desert.".

>> I'm guessing. >> Wow. >> Bureau of Land Management officially. confirmed piles were human remains. The. department was actively investigating. crem. So they were all cremated. Cremated bodies. >> Well, then what's. >> 315 piles of dead bodies? >> Wow. >> That's so many. >> Yeah. There are rules to you know in. order to spread the ashes you know you. want to do it in in the ocean you have. to be I don't know how many kilometers. in you cannot just do it. >> right. >> so there are laws. >> you can scatter you're on your own. property obviously of course public land.

the rules may vary by the location. national parks you have to get a special. use permit. >> who do you think is buried in a spread. in a in a national park got to be. Roosevelt right. >> I mean wouldn't that make the most sense. oceans and waterways. >> but you can spread ashes sneakily a lot. People do that. >> Yeah, >> people do it all the time. Well, people. do, you know, people do a lot I've heard. this that people go to like when they go. to baseball games or soccer field, soccer pitches or something that means a. lot to them, they carry a little bag and. they they spread it out there. >> Oh, cool. >> That that I think you would [ __ ]. >> The Emirates. Yeah. >> What is that? >> Someone's mom from Bad Friends Live.

>> that What? Are you being serious? >> Yeah, it's Luke's mum. This is from. >> Oh, this from London. >> No, no, it was from um I believe. Pittsburgh. >> I can't believe we still have that. >> Yeah, we've had it for two years here. We don't know what to do with them. >> This is meaningful to me. >> Well, let's combine Luke's mom, your. dad, and your dad. [laughter]. >> Yeah. Yeah. This is what happened. What. if Luke's mom's hot? >> Yeah. Your both your dads would be like, "Fuck yeah.". >> Oh, yeah. Very cool. [laughter]. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> From the afterlife. >> Let's mix some. Dude,

>> I see bone. >> Do you have some Do you just have some. of your dad? >> He's not here in LA. >> He's not going to make it. >> He's not going to do it. Why? [laughter]. I just think we should. >> I mean, I guess. Did Koreans and Spanish. always get along? H. >> I think we I think my dad and your dad. would get along. [laughter]. >> Koreans are a little abusive, so I don't. know. >> A little. Holy [ __ ] Well, look at that. Modern relations between South Korea and. Spaniards are very good, characterized. by increasing cooperation and cultural. exchange. Historically, Spanish. missionaries who first encountered. Koreans described them as peaceful, intelligent, though a long period of. limited interaction followed. Once they.

saw them once, they were like, "They're. very nice." Like, you going to go back? No chance. >> [laughter]. >> Both countries have since forged a. modern strategic partnership based on. shared values like democracy and have. experienced similar histories of civil. war and subskin rabbit economic growth. It is that is pretty [ __ ]. interesting. I I mean it is it is kind. of wild to think about the spreading of. the ashes and what does that do for the. area that they're spread in? >> I like when you go back to the east. coast and you're in some old creepy. [ __ ] you're like it's got to be b I. think I think haunted [ __ ] it's only. because they buried stuff beneath it. Like when you're on native land, it's.

cuz they buried on native land. >> And when they're like, "Yeah, that area. is haunted.". >> I'm always like, "Well, they're under. there.". >> You know? >> Mhm. >> I also saw. uh talk about country relations. I saw. this thing this morning on the way to. the airport about Finland in the Finland. open prison program. These guys get to. like come and go as they please. >> Yeah, they have cars. >> It's [ __ ] unreal. >> They have cars. >> This guy was working out and then he. went to he went to work. He went to a. cold plunge. Yeah, I saw that. I saw. that. Yeah. Yeah. This guy.

>> This guy. Yeah. Look at Hey, I murdered. somebody. [laughter]. >> He's He is in there for murder. For. murder one. And And he's like joking. around. He goes to a garden. He's like. picking FL. It's pretty It's wild. >> Yeah. I mean, the idea of in Europe is. that, you know, prison is a place to reh. >> rehabilitate. >> Yeah. >> It's something that Americans do not. believe in. >> No. No. >> But do you believe in it as a European? >> I think so. Yes. I think it's a. >> I think some people. >> Yeah. I mean, obviously there's they. might be some exception. >> We probably have the world's most.

violent, twisted criminals. I would. imagine the US is number one again. >> Hell yeah. >> At that I bet we have the most [ __ ] up. wild [ __ ]. >> Yeah. Okay. What What crime? Let's say. we're a government. >> We are kind of a little. >> We're a little government. What crime is. too much to do the rehab? >> How about seconddegree murder? >> Second degree? See, look up second. degree. >> No, let's say I'm a presenter. I'm going. to present you a case. Yeah. >> All right. So, um, I have a client here, Al. Welcome, >> guys. Thanks for. >> What's the client's name?

>> Alfred Simmons. >> And, um, he, um, came home from a trip. early. >> Went to his house. >> Yeah. >> And his wife was having sex with two of. his workmates. >> Where do they work? >> Uh, Costco. >> Oh, seriously? >> Yeah. >> I love Costco. [snorts]. >> Corporate, though. >> So, this man Okay. This [laughter] man, >> this man comes home from work. Yeah. He. finds his wife in bed with two of his. Costco co-workers and they're going at. it. What position are they in? >> Oh, every position, my friend. Um. >> Wow. So, he's just sitting and watching.

He's cucking. Is he cucking for a. little? >> Yeah. Well, his friend David is upside. down. I don't know how they got the. ropes tied around his ankles upside down. on [laughter] just the ceiling, but he's. upside down and he's licking her um. >> tush armpit. [snorts]. >> Oh, >> yeah. [laughter] Yeah. Please don't. assume, sir. >> Sorry. >> Okay. And um the other one, a little. dwarf man, little person. [laughter] All. right. And he's got marshmallows all. over his body. He boiled down. marshmallows, put it all over his body, right? And he's sort of just like on her.

chest and just. >> getting the marshmallow juice on her on. her breastes. >> Got it. >> You know what I mean? Region, right? >> It sounds more fun than bad. >> It's pretty fun. It was a fun time. But. anyway, this guy, >> this um Simmons took a machete. >> Simmons. What was it was Alfred? >> Alfred Simmon Simmons. Mr. Simmons. >> Mr. Simmons. Yeah. I'm sorry. I call him. Simmons. [laughter]. >> Yeah. >> He took a machete. >> Yeah. >> Uh. >> and he chopped up. the unfortunately.

>> But what about the other men? >> They're fine. >> Okay. [laughter]. >> Yeah. >> So, it was an unintentional second. degree killing. It was non premeditated. It was. >> That was second degree. >> Yes. Cuz since it was a dwarf, right, [laughter] we couldn't charge him with. first. >> first degree, right? Yeah. Oh, >> you could always get him for half degree. murder. We we consider that and it's. like a half. >> half degree murder. >> Half person. Yeah. So anyway, um. >> he deserves rehabilitation. >> Okay. Good. Good. Right. >> I I heard you have a client. >> But I would I would say this. >> Yeah. Yeah.

>> You would need to have him make amends. with the family with the family of the. the little person that was murdered. So. you'd have to get him. >> to go to find that first of all, you got. to find that tree that. >> Well, we we'd have to buy him a plane. ticket to get to Middle Earth and. >> Right. Yeah. Yeah. And we don't even. know how to. >> That's what I'm saying. >> We don't even know how to do that. >> So, I heard you had a little client. >> I do have a client. Yeah. So, tell us. Yeah. Barbaduke. Uh, Mr. Barbaduke here. >> Well, based on the name, >> Alan Barbaduk. >> Okay. >> Uh, he's a he's a doctor and [snorts] a. lawyer and a physicist. >> Oh, wow. >> He's very well accomplished.

>> Oh, already then. Probably ready for re. rehabilitation. >> I don't know. >> Okay. Well, the case was pretty. egregious. He was eating lunch at a. Jimmy John's and uh. >> Good sandwich. freaky fast. And uh I. I'll tell you, he was eating lunch and. he found a pubic hair in his sandwich. >> Oh. >> And he turned around and a bunch of the. young teenage pimplefaced boys braces. They were laughing. Shit's lit, dude. What do you think about that, bro? Our. pubes are in your [ __ ] mouth, [ __ ]. >> Oh, so these kids put their own pubic.

regions inside the sandwich. Well, that. is. >> three teenage boys. >> Really uncalled for. >> Three teenage boys. >> Um wow. But Barbaduk was he took this. the wrong way because he was having a. flashback from the time. >> What was his first name? >> Uh. >> what's Barbaduke's first name? >> Mr. Barbaduke. >> No. What's his first name? You said. >> it doesn't matter. [laughter]. >> But Mr. Barbaduke had a flashback from. his childhood where um he was bullied. when he was very young and many people. in the neighborhood make him eat their. pubes. So it was.

>> pube the Duke. It was a game play. That's understandable. >> So Mr. Barbaduke kind of had a. flashback. >> Uh he grabbed. >> What did Mr. Barber Duke do? He grabbed. one of the butter. He grabbed one of the. bread knives um and he slowly um cut up. each of the teenage boys and he cooked. them and they're still now serving some. of them at Jimmy John's. >> It's it's a new flavor. You know, Chipotle introduces something new every. couple of months. Yes. >> Now Jimmy John's introducing Teenage. Boy. >> Okay. Uh any. >> Well, it's interesting that you would. say that because it's like first of all, um.

you would think that once somebody's. carving up one teenage boy that the. other teenage boys would run. >> He cut he uh he he dismembered all he he. took the knife and. >> cut off all their legs. >> with a butter knife. >> With a butter knife. >> A bread knife. >> A bread knife. Bread knife. >> seems difficult to do. >> Well, dude, be Mr. Barbaduk is quite. strong. He trained he trained Taekwond. do and uh swordmastery when he was in. college. >> Okay. Well, I've never seen that done, but anyway, >> he's very skilled. >> Yeah, >> he's well skilled.

>> What do you think, guys? >> Rehab. >> Rehab. Rehab. Rehab. Rehab. Rehab. >> You think he's good? >> Yeah, we're good. Yeah, he's [laughter]. good. >> Mr. Barbara Duke, we're fine. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Carlos doesn't realize he's Mr. Barbad. >> In prison, can you wake up when you. whenever you want to wake up? >> No. I think there's a there's a bedtime, there's a wake up time, there's a yard, >> but I can't go I'm going to sleep in. I'm going to mix up. >> You would You would The prison would. hurt you a lot. >> Oh, I bet. >> Cuz bedtime. >> They wouldn't be able to walk or. anything. >> You could. I mean, and honestly, then. you'd have to get up and do [ __ ] They. need. >> No, but I can't go. Hey, yo, prison.

guard. What's your name? Larry. >> Prison guard. >> Yeah. >> Tomorrow. >> I'm Larry. >> Hey, Larry. >> So, tomorrow, you know, breakfast and. all that stuff. We sleep in. >> No, wake up. You got to do exercise and. clean. >> Yeah, but I'll do that after lunch. >> No. Well, we'll just beat you then. [laughter]. >> What do you mean? >> We'll just beat you. We'll physically. come in. >> I didn't do anything. I just want to. sleep in. I I tire. >> Too bad. No cameras. >> Oh [ __ ] You'll beat me with what? >> Huh? >> What would you beat me with? >> What do you want to be beat with? [laughter].

>> Baton. >> Do you think they would beat me? >> [ __ ]. >> They would make me get up in the morning. like a military. >> Abs [ __ ] That's what they do. >> To work. >> You got to go [ __ ]. >> Do you sleep early? Like, yo, I'm I'm. going to sleep early. >> I think so. >> Do we even go to bed early? >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. I think you I don't know. >> Lights out is 11. It's like. >> Can you Google it? I don't think they. do. They make you wake up. I don't think. they do. >> There's No, I don't think so. >> Yes, they do. >> No. This is. >> Also, it depends on what level of prison. you're in. >> Yes, you do have to wake up in prison. around 6:00 a.m. Structured daily. schedule includes mandatory headcounts. and work assignments. Yeah, man. They do. you got to do [ __ ].

>> You're forced to do labor. >> Yeah, it's it's you're doing late. Yeah. >> Oh my god. >> They get paid. >> But they would let him do standup and. get out of it. [snorts]. >> You know what I do? >> What? >> [ __ ] everyone. >> Yeah. [laughter]. >> You would get [ __ ]. >> Whatever. Whatever it takes. I I want to. sleep in. be bottom. [laughter]. Oh, >> how did it go? You How did that Friday. go? >> It was okay. I mean, I love San. Francisco. The punch is great. And you. were there before and then you know they. talked all about you. Bobby was just. here. >> That was a cool week. It was me Tuesday,

Wednesday, then you Thursday, Friday, Saturday, right? >> And on Friday during the day, uh, Matt. Na shows was Doug Benson. How funny is. that? >> No. >> Yeah, he did 4 p.m. >> Wow. >> He does like 420 shows in certain. cities. He'll do Oh, that's fun. >> At 4:20 p.m. Yeah. I think he did. Saturday before me, I think. >> That's a lot of fun. I didn't even get. to [ __ ] see him though because. obviously he's on the road in and out. But yeah, >> no dude, that Club Punch was great. I. San Francisco's awesome. There is also a. perception of San Francisco that that. comics have sometimes where they're like. San Francisco liberals snood. They were.

[ __ ] I could I said everything. It. was rad. It's fun. They I I I just think. San Francisco is misunderstood as an. audience. >> Also, the homeless seem safer. >> They're not as knify. Yeah, they're not. as knify and they're having. conversations with themselves which is. nice. >> That's I just saw a guy doing you ain't. got no clarity within this TIME FRAME. WHAT DO YOU MEAN JAMAL? They're like. talking to [laughter] each other.

>> INFINITY STONES CREATE THE MAGIC. YOU. KNOW WHAT I MEAN? LIKE IT MAN. [laughter] And they're having. conversations with each other. >> and so you're just kind of walking by. You can't add. >> No, [laughter]. >> you can't. You can't go. The mind frame. is down below. >> and they're like, "Why'd you say it?". You know what I mean? Yeah. But. >> you you can listen to them. They're not. You know what I mean? Like Knive Shanky. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> We needed We needed That would be funny. to put an uh homeless guy at an improv. and sign him up for 101 or whatever over. at UCB.

>> Yeah. >> Just a homeless schizophrenic guy and he. just kills. He gets on SNL year two. >> Yeah, [laughter] that'd be cool. Yeah. Ladies and gentlemen, Crazy Bones. [laughter]. >> But um but there is a lot. Do you see a. lot of homeless there? >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They're fine. But. they're so sad. >> Well, we live here. >> I see it [ __ ] here. I I Where. >> I love the homeless here. >> So crazy. I saw one person in Spain in. those [snorts] two and. >> you kill them. You kill them. You get. rid of them. You guys are You got What.

do you do with the homeless? >> What do you do with the homeless here? >> Airplane in LA. [laughter]. The J I saw a couple Tik Toks today. about Japanese homeless. You know what I. mean? And the typhoons get them. [laughter]. The typhoon definitely. >> they do. >> That's real. >> The typhoons [ __ ] them up. Yeah. Yeah. >> Well, they look so cool. No, >> that's just a cool guy. >> No, it's like a famous meme cuz it. really is a homeless dude. >> I No, I wanted to um start a clothing. line called Hobo and that was when I. brought it a company. That was the.

photo. >> I mean, you look. >> I want to do a line of clothing that. looked like that. You wear that [ __ ] all. the time. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Balenciaga kind of does that. >> Yeah. They they get it off of that. Russian dude. You know that Russian. dude? >> Mm-m. >> Okay. Look up Balenciaga and then the. Russian street wear guy. >> That's right. >> Have you seen this before? No. >> You're going to love this. >> This guy, >> this guy right here, right? He goes to. thrift stores and he's wear and he's. influencing fashion fashion trends.

He's like a homeless guy in [ __ ]. Russia. Mhm. >> Are they paying him? >> No. >> So, they want to keep this man homeless. just for his art ideas. >> It's [laughter] a good idea. >> Smart. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Don't let him Don't let him in. >> And they steal his fashion ideas by. looking at his photos. >> And he knows this. >> Look at he That's what he normally. wears. And then look what they did. [laughter]. >> I mean, >> it's incredible. >> That's [ __ ] dark. >> What? >> Who's who? >> The guy on the right. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Go back to some of. these other ones.

>> I mean, dude, dope. No. >> Yeah, he's got a cool style. >> Yeah, good style. >> Yeah, he's cool. >> Obviously, he was an artist of some. kind. >> I don't know. >> Harper. Yeah. Bizarre. Just. >> Ukrainian magazine. >> Wow. It's incredible. >> It's crazy. They just stealing from. them. >> Oh, let me tell you something that. happened. >> Yeah. >> Oh my god. You just It pissed me off, dude. >> Yeah.

So I flying to San Francisco. You have a. Do you have a driver? >> No. >> How do you get to the hotel? >> Just Uber. >> Okay. Well, I have a driver. >> I know you do. >> Okay. >> Yeah. He tells me. >> Yeah. >> You get the driver for me. >> I get the driver for you. It's not his. deal. >> Yeah. >> You pay for my driver. [laughter]. >> I pay for your everything. >> Okay. So, anyway, um. >> No, he pays for his own [ __ ] deal. >> Yeah, of course. Yeah. >> So, this guy, you know, I I land there's. a guy has a signed Lee. I go, "Hey, it's.

me." He's like, "What's your first. name?" [laughter]. I go, "Bobby.". He's like, "Okay." [laughter]. I'm not lying. It gets worse. Then we. actually were walking smoking to the. car. >> Yeah. >> He goes, "Uh, what hotel you staying at?". >> He doesn't know. Isn't it in the [ __ ]. thing? >> So, I ask him. >> Go, don't you know what hotel I'm. staying at? Because I do. Do you? [laughter]. I go, "I don't know. It's in some of my.

I have to go to my emails and check it. out." Just. >> getting kidnapped by a fan. >> No, just check out. He goes, "No, I. can't put you in my car unless I know. what hotel you're staying at.". >> Seriously? >> Yeah. And I go, "Wait, what? You already. I already gave you my name, right?" He's. like, "It's rules, man. >> I've never heard this in my life.". >> Yeah. And now I'm going through my. emails. Then I finally go the hotel. He's like, "Okay.". >> Wow. And I still gave him a big tip. >> You I knew you I was just going to say I.

bet you gave him 100 bucks. >> But I did I threw it at him almost. [laughter]. >> You know what I mean? I go, "Here you. go, man." I whipped it at him. >> Yeah. [ __ ] him, >> right? I just got out. Didn't say. goodbye or anything. It pissed me off. >> Yeah. That's [ __ ] weird, dude. >> Do you know why? He doesn't think that I. am anything. >> How many Lees have he seen? You know, >> it's San Francisco. >> I also said Bobby. >> You know what I mean? >> That's a rare Lee. That's a less common. Lee. >> Yeah. It's also like, you know, I don't.

know. Is Did I read it wrong? >> No. That's [ __ ] weird though that he. I don't know why he. >> has Has that ever happened to you? >> I take Ubers. >> You've never gotten a car. It's the same. amount of money. >> No, I have, but they've never No, I. have. It's not the same amount of money. I [laughter]. >> What do you mean? >> It's more expensive for sure. It's way. more expensive. No, but I I have taken. We've got. >> I'll do a reverse from now on. Is that. what you're saying? >> No. >> No. It's You're paying for it. >> You deserve it. >> I don't deserve anything. I just like. it's like I like the torture of a. foreigner who's speaking on the phone. I. like that. [laughter]. >> I like to go to a new city and hear.

their foreign their foreign local, you. know. >> Yeah. >> Redhead. That's I would like I want to [laughter]. hear that. >> Yeah. >> No, but I I I I've had that before. I've. had it before where I'm like, "Oh, that's me." And because I use an alias, I don't use my name. I'm like, "That's. me." And then they have to like check. >> to to make sure because it's not you. know what I mean? Yeah. >> Because it's not my name. >> I see. >> Because it's weird that they hold your. [ __ ] name. That's the weirdest thing.

>> That's why I put mine when we go on the. road. >> Yeah. That's smart. But you're so. [ __ ] famous. Bobby Lee. The name is. famous. >> Oh, this guy had no idea. [laughter]. >> He knows who you are. >> No, >> he maybe he was [ __ ] with you. >> He wasn't. Dude, I. >> How old was he? >> He was like Brazilian, so he had a thick. accent. >> Oh, you know what I mean? But um. >> I almost I almost gave him a bad review, but I didn't do it. >> No. No, you can't do this. >> Why? Why can't you? >> You can't. It's not. Let him suffer. You're f You're living a great life. [ __ ] him.

>> You're right. You're right. You're. right. >> Was it worse than our mean Uber driver. in Detroit? >> What Uber driver? >> Remind me. >> Remember we were three packed in the. back of the car? He was being so rude to. us and you were asking him if you could. turn the AC on and he just wasn't. listening. Kept turning his music. >> Was that the one where we were laughing. really loud? >> There was one Uber I was in with you. That was ridiculous. >> Well, no, that was inond London. >> Oh, that was so funny. >> We were on the way to the show with. Chappelle. >> Yeah. Yeah, that was so funny. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> And you asked what this building was and. he was like, >> he goes [laughter].

>> and we and that's all he did. He turned. back around and there was dead silence. at first and then all of a sudden we. just lost. >> I died. I died laugh. Although we also. we also validated and we were like, "Oh, cool.". >> Oh, you were in the car. >> Yeah, we pretended to be on the phone. afterwards. Yeah. What? >> You pretended to be on the phone. I'd be. like, "What?" Okay. [laughter]. >> That was so fun. >> But then you guys were like, "We're. going to bomb tonight.". >> Oh, yeah. >> Oh, yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. We could feel it. Something. was in the air that night. As soon as we. passed [ __ ] Abbey Road, I was like, "We're dead. We're [laughter] legends.".

And then we're [ __ ] penis jokes. >> Thank you for being a bad friend. Woo! Yeah! Woo!