Bobby Loves Giant Melons | Ep 208 | Bad Friends
hey hey hey guys we have new merchie. merch Mery merch mer we got these new. this is like a fear and loathing kind of. a Vibe this is like a shout out to the. Beasty Boys album um they come in a ton. of different colors yeah ton of. different varieties we've got crew necks. hoodies long sleeves all sorts of fun. stuff for you uh go to badri merch.com. to get that now badri merch.com I am. running uh running new jokes to to uh to. put together my new hour uh I'm in. Houston Tampa Phoenix Nashville Dallas.
San Francisco I'm just doing a bunch of. clubs uh to put together the new hour go. to Andrew Santino dcom for those tickets. Andrew Santino dcom you two are bad. friends who are these two idiots a white. dude and an Asian dude you two are. disgusting you two or something we're. bad friends hey. hi hey hi it's good wow Long Beach I. know this is got but that was good huh I. loved Long Beach that was such a fun you. have so much fun not just fun it was.
just kind of magical to when there's. sometimes there's magic there was magic. in the air yeah and uh I'll tell you. this proud moment what's your proud. moment proud boy moment yeah I think a. proud boy moment last night was all of. our agents and managers showing up. simultaneously talking and they talked. actually for the first time in a long. time there was hugs going on talking I. was like what's going on couple hugs. couple of hugs not a lot of hugs and. then I had all what what about the goop. that's that's what that's my yeah that. was the win I was going to let you get. there I didn't want you to get cut off. off by one of The Producers I wanted you.
to get there organically but that's okay. I know we were going to get there too. the proud moment last night was for the. fans hearing backstage people go goop. goop goop goop the goop did five minutes. 10 10 minutes I don't even know I mean. he yeah and you told me cuz I told him. so what' I say can we just talk go ahead. so you can't came to me the goop can. only do like like just bring them up and. then T take them out well here's why I. know I understand why we started 25. minutes late the fans I was like uh oh.
people are being people are going to get. ory right and also this is my production. brain the seats were there was no middle. row so if you were in the middle and you. had to get up to piss you had to get up. and be excuse me excuse me yeah for like. 60 seats yeah so I was like man people. are going to be anany to get the show. going so we started late then we had two. of our friends who are store employees. go up uh first so now the show is you. know now we're getting deep into the. show and I thought all right if goop. goes on now and drags his feet.
we're in some trouble but when I talk to. I know but here's what happens you tell. me maybe the goop shouldn't do it or may. just say hi cuz he was so nervous about. it he goes I don't want to do the thing. about the goop dude he came through not. just came through guys like the goop. dude they say I don't know what I'm. doing I'm sweaty you know I mean I eat. Skittles you know I mean you know I mean. I have all these conditions yeah. diabetes yeah right he goes up there and. he hits a home run and I realized that. night I go he's one one of those yeah he.
he he's a liar yeah he walks around go I. don't know nothing but you know. everything yeah he does right he he's. like my brother in that way my brother. acts shy and stuff but then he can do it. he can do all of it yeah he can do all. of it my point is that goop you're a. liar I bet you muddy too he Taps ass. yeah he Taps ass probably five times an. ey we we're not aware we think he's five. five different women wow wow and men. wowow and wonder durable oh yeah and.
that dribble dies well a a painful death. you get a new one just inside himself. what he hangs himself no he's in the. hole he's in his [ __ ] he just grabs a. butt hair and just brings it. inside yeah the goop Crush last night he. crushed and then who else crushed Ramsey. and Angie two employees of the store did. great on the show they St open the show. then the goop then jety and Bobby and me. and the crowd was on fire and then Angie. today she goes thank you for the.
greatest moment of my life really yeah. it was the she said it was the best. moment of her life you have to. understand these these people that work. the door what they get the belly room. the O every once in a while they don't. get thousands and thousands of people. cheering them on you know and so it was. a magical moment for her and then um. some celebrity showed up we want to name. who but some celebrity showed up we. could say that's not a big deal our my. our friends uh Rob mhany and Caitlyn. Olen show up from always sunny showed up.
yes super sweet and. kind they absolutely love the show Rob. texted me this morning yeah yeah and he. was like how [ __ ] fun oh wow so happy. for you guys he was like how fun and I. told him I said I'm giving you a heads. up this is not a typical standup show. like because they were like hey we want. to come to that show and I said it's not. going to be what you think it's going to. be weird there's going to be standup. there's going to be bits from the show. it's going to be kind of unique for our. audience for the bad friends when bad. friends audiences they know what's. coming yeah and he was like it was. perfect it was so yeah he was so they.
were both like oh my God they were so. sweet backstage oh dude who else did we. have are you kidding me we have dun. founded back there we had uh your boy. Jee Hong came we had a lot of cool. people come and then what happened then. the agents. mhm I. know can we get some money before we. leave oh this is what they did yeah they. flew into my dressing well they first. went into your dressing room yeah they. all went into mine your agents came into. my dress I know all my when I was like I.
I was like why they I heard the flapping. mhm and the insect. antennas buzzing around we're making fun. of Agents cuz they're just kind of. buzzing yeah they're Buzz yeah they're. always like so they came into my. room they're bis buzzing by you and they. were like this is our new one so they. had a new agent yeah they did bring. somebody new you're right and there's. she's your girl now like get some sort. of sacrifice or something yeah right and. then I go who is she she's like she's. the one.
and every year there's a one there's a. one they promise me the world and guess. what none of it happens I don't even get. the world I get nothing you get like uh. zero you get like Ohio you don't get the. world you get Ohio oh ha I I get a. couple of gigs couple of lines and some. things but they're always like yeah it's. coming it's you're the next big thing. it's not nah and you know what when you. realize that that's okay it's great yeah. you I feel more at Bay I feel more at.
peace with the world it is what it is it. is what it is dude um also last night. pulling the Australian kid from the. crowd was great oh he was fantastic dude. what's such a what a what a sweet boy. and it's nice to know we got fans down. under he didn't kiss me though I was a. little annoyed by that annoyed yeah. pissed me off that would have killed cuz. here you were face to face you're a. handsome guy he's a handsome guy why not. make the moment more special why not. make the moment a little bit more. special and give a little one little. smooch that's all you wanted yeah but he. kept like and I was like I can't force.
it I know you there's thousands of. people watching three actually yeah. that'd be bad a lot of witnesses your. honor we have all the witnesses yeah it. was a beautiful theater too what a. beautiful that's where Richard PRI shot. uh Richard PRI live in 1979 wow do you. know that sometimes I'm like wow this is. crazy but zoom in if you don't mind at. the bottom this was in the hallway on. the way to the stage I saw it and it. says on December 10th 1979 Richard PRI. filmed Richard PRI live in concert right. here on the Terrace Theater stage hailed. is the single greatest standup. performance ever captured on film this.
film not only had raw humor on police. brutality sex race marriage but also. helped kick off the standup boom of the. 1980s performing in the same stage as. Richard prior is both an aspiration and. a profound honor symbolizing the. completion of a comedic Journey break a. leg out there I thought that was what a. beautiful thing and I read that. literally before we started the show wow. because I kind of saw the poster you see. posters that you pass through these. hallways and you think oh they showed. like Elvis had performed there they said. the the the Beatles had like they had. all the posters in the basement yeah and. it is amazing you're like we're sharing.
these AG but this just hit me in the. chest for some reason it was like wow. this dude filmed there chose there wow. The Beatles performed there Beatles they. had and the Rolling Stones probably. Beatles Stones Elvis dude the basement. was in the amount of people that. performed there was shocking yeah and I. think we forget sometimes we're in that. same venue we're not Elvis first of all. we are Elvis no we're not we are our. Elvis yeah. Elvis yeah okay we're Elvis with a. butthole Elvis didn't show the audience.
their butthole yes he did that's why he. would shake back and forth he was. loosening like I 69 the [ __ ]. Australian guy last night with my ass. out yeah yeah Elvis didn't have the. balls to do that yeah and I'm like 69ing. this guy this Australian guy he's. freaking out and I look and I see my. manager looking at me. going and I'm like I'm sorry there was a. tape I heard Google this Elvis talking. to girlfriend from war.
what El there was a recorded phone call. of Elvis talking to his girlfriend over. the phone from war no it's funny she's. like pissed off cuz she's like what's. going on out there with all the other. girls and he's like I'm not there's no. other girls baby she's like yeah this is. it this is it play. this I don't think about. not because you don't think of me no. because you don't miss me no that's not. oh [ __ ] well that's what it seems like. me.
elv I don't I but I don't see he's. dealing with it changed they haven't. changed throughout the time caveman did. this you know what I. mean wow they haven't changed she says. at some point I'm not a baby I'm a I'm a. ground lady she says at some point I. want to smack you and beat the [ __ ] out. of you yeah she's like I want to hurt. you and hit you but you hear this whole.
in need a wood conversation and I swear. to God I had the same thought I thought. it's the same what nothing was different. we have this Fascination that that back. then there was like a Glitz and a. glamour to it where was like you know. where where it's like my love I miss you. so much I can't wait to she's like I. miss you too I can't wait to feel your. Embrace and say she's like I want to hit. you in your [ __ ] head. Elvis yeah and he's like you ain't going. to do that you ain't going to do that. yeah it's exactly what happens today. nothing's different he had power that we. don't have now well he was the global he.
could literally walk into anywhere hey. baby my day but listen and they were. like okay I mean there's no. other yeah I mean it wouldn't even that. that's how much Fame he had yeah sure. this is when like the Beatles would show. up and people would faint who's who. faints now if somebody fainted for you. it' be i' I'd love every single second. of it no I would be concerned I go are. you okay you know get him to the. hospital no I'll leave him there. those no I'm kidding well anyway we.
shared the stage with some of these. great Legends last night and and we only. have four shows left and boy oh boy is. it uh it's not four it's only four left. we're doing well Australia in the United. States oh yeah no yes we are going to. Australia in November the dates are. going to be announced finally we are. doing it we are going we're very I bet. your money in 2025 we'll go back out no. yeah yeah I bet your money if it's okay. I'll bet you anything you've got cuz it. would take two of us to say yes okay can. I and I'm not going to say yes yeah yeah.
really I think I want to reformulate uh. I think I I want to work on my hour 2026. then 26 we'll be out and that's the last. one and then we're done for good yeah. yeah it we'll be fun done for good [ __ ]. that you know that's not true you and I. will doing this until we can't do it. anymore I don't know man [ __ ] you what. do you got going on what do you got. going on we don't know we don't know. what stardew valley stardew Valley hun. haunted chocolateers tears oh can I say. another thing about you yeah go ahead I. know what you're gonna do.
what am I goingon to do it's what you. because you do it to me during the meet. and greets if if a f if a fan says. anything to me about anything I'm. interested in which they almost never do. but if a fan says Hey Santino can I ask. you a question about XYZ you always go. oh get the [ __ ] out of here nobody but. then you am I wrong Carlos you're there. every time he's there every time and he. knows go ahead say this when they bring. up golf you get really mad because about. your dad mhm yeah because I have trauma. associated with it that's not true don't. do that that's such I'll say he get mad. because it's not about a self [ __ ].
piece of [ __ ] that's not why you get mad. cuz it's not about you I tell you what. you did last night I tell you what you. did last night and it's [ __ ] wrong. I'm so glad you brought it up dude go. ahead you brought it up you. dummy. dummy all I'm going to tell you you get. mad when it's not about you for 3. seconds you talk about gol it's fine I. I'll just roll my eyes that's what you. did but it never happens is a thing they. always talk about your stuff yes thank. you Carlos thank you Carlos really no. that's true though no can I just say. what you did last not like the truth you. don't like the truth every [ __ ] nerd.
comes up I have a Star Wars shirt that I. made with our faces on it BL and then I. just sit there and smile and I don't and. I'm not rude and then you go who's your. favorite. g whatever I just let you do it but then. last night you were [ __ ] ho ho. humming on about [ __ ] farming no. that's so a girl comes to me and she. goes um there's going to be a new um not. DLC but a new like update for stard du. valo well maybe I should start a new you. know me and farm then she you should I. go and then we start talking about like.
I go about the melons and how the. gigantic melon forms when when you when. you Pro crop like the same kind of seed. sometimes with cauliflower melon a. gigantic one forms and you have to chop. it down with an axe that's it. whoa okay that's fine but that what you. waa that's fine but this is what you. [ __ ] you awes stop stop and then this is. what you did wa how big it is look at. how big it is right but then for four or. five minutes you go melons you [ __ ].
nerd yep and you rub it in my face even. after like 10 minutes go by you'll go. [ __ ] melons dude chopping down with. axe [ __ ] you and I'm like dude I don't. say that about when you talk about go. yeah you do when anybody says anything. nice to me you go oh shut the [ __ ] up. are you talking about sports you're. racist the way you just did my that's. [ __ ] racist dude have you not have. you not been watching this show are you. not on this show dumb ass you didn't do.
it in a comedy way you did it in a. [ __ ] racist way dude really dude. again look at that really dude well the. lights are hitting me BR all right. anyway [ __ ] you dude [ __ ] you anyways. loser see I'm not a loser dude I'm a. winner I'm tired of people whatever you. need to tell to yourself dude yeah I'm a. winner nerd yeah the watermel get so. big did you cut him down no can I just. explain to you what happens and I think.
I think we're Miss right when you plant. melons in it yeah dude no just let me. finish I think you're misunderstanding. see you in your underwear with like food. on your belly just being like look at. how F the watermelon star you're [ __ ]. you're idiocracy you're literally what. Mike Judge wrote about yeah like just. numb uh stuffed with junk food watching. a melon the melon is big.
you know what's so funny I'm about to. walk dude I like I'm about to walk dude. I I you really got me on the fence. battle I like I I like some of the nerd. [ __ ] you and I share a lot of nerd [ __ ]. in common actually well then there we go. what the [ __ ] the problem dog but. let's be honest okay all jokes aside. yeah you know I love when you connect. with the fans I don't like it when. you're mean to me about what I like with. the fans that's my retaliation because. if a fan goes Santino I'm wearing a. Bulls jacket and you immediately make. fun of them I don't make fun of the fans.
for liking your stop I don't make fun of. the fans for liking your stuff I make. fun of you when they're gone am I right. Carlos you see it firstand you see it. firsthand look at that way he paused no. he knows no he's trying to no here's. what it is he's you cuz you're such a. [ __ ] manipulative gas bully look what. he's doing now Andrew is right and it. thank you I know it is you get mad at. the I know but does it does it carry. over into two or three other well this. is a whole new argument yeah it's a. whole new argument exactly you're making. a to go quickly yeah I'll say that I'll.
say you let it go quickly but you bully. the fans but you bully the fans and I. don't bully your fans I don't oh you. don't bully my fans no we just we just. went over this two seconds ago like and. they go we got you gummy bears you're. like gummy bears no I've never done I. know you I just made that up I just made. that up I just made that up thank you. see yeah you're right I made that up. let's get back I don't even know why. we're [ __ ] I'm not fighting with you. I can I just say I don't want to fight. with. you I love you I don't know man I'm.
supportive as [ __ ] of you and I know you. are but I'm just saying you know here's. one H here's one thing that happened. with one of your fans he goes this has. never happened with any of my fans he. looked to me he goes I just went a photo. with Andrew and it had it happened in. Atlanta do you remember that and it hurt. my feelings okay well none of my fans. would do that here's here here's how. selfish and unaware you are if you want. to get into this many many many if not. multiple times every time you've named. one shitty instance multiple times do we.
have fans in the meet and greets. multiple times they be line to you. they're so excited they say hi they. don't even look at me not to like baby. or say hi or say Hi Well if they knew. the real if they knew the real you but. uh they don't even say hi or look at me. and I just politely do the thing and. take the oh let's move on let's okay oh. you don't like. that oh you don't like when it's real. yeah yeah no cuz I oh you want to go I. handle it professionally else yeah you. don't thank you I handle it. professionally and I move move on and I.
move forward let's talk about something. more fun that can get you and I because. as best friends I don't want to I don't. know man shut up don't do that what what. are you doing don't say I don't know I. do know say I love you right now one two. three love you oh you son of a God say. it I won't not right now say I love at. the end no say it why say it or I won't. move. forward you're acting like such a baby. today say I love you I won't I don't. like when people tell me when to say it. say I love you you know I do right say. it do you not know I do I don't know it.
right now right there are times where I. love you what's that laugh I don't know. it right now okay I'm going to say say. around the road Andreas I love you. mcon I like you Carlos I like you I. don't get love no not lately not. lately. Andrew cheers that's so much better. cheers is like you know you're putting a. glass up to the world they clink it they.
did it at Lord of the Rings during one. well you're sober so let's not do a. cheers okay um let's do a lighter do. people when they smoke crack when people. smoke crack do they cheers pipes with. other people smoking Rock fun that's so. funny do they do do little link and then. lose teeth yeah say I love you right now. why say it I love you say it for real I. swear to God I just said it look me in. the face and say it for real was I will. we will end the show tonight well you're. acting like a such a baby you know what. can I say something you need to grow out. of this it is so funny when he says. you're acting like a baby.
knowing you're the biggest. baby you're the biggest baby I know all. right I love you man love you dude all. right let's do something real I love. everything dude no no you don't Mone. let's let's talk about Mone oh boy this. [ __ ] idiot get up to the mic you. dumbass this [ __ ] oh my God duck down. so you can talk to the mic yes keep your. head like that so this [ __ ] we're. leaving Sacramento right it's a. 30-minute ride from the hotel to the to. the airp. okay we get to the airport right plenty.
of time it was not not too early in the. morning it was fine right we had a noon. flight plenty of time we get there mcon. in a moment of panic says I left my car. keys in the hotel right and I. said dude what are you g to do and he. goes well I don't know I'm calling. around to people and I'm trying to. figure out how I can do my week without. my car because I have an extra key u my. roommate can bring it to me but it won't. unlock my car cuz I need the digital. whooop because somebody tried to break. into my car with a screwdriver this.
guy's whole life it's Kramer he's Kramer. right so then I said okay dude then you. need your original car key otherwise. you're not going to be able to get into. your car and who knows if the if they're. going to ship it blah blah blah my. assumption Andrew Santino's assumption. he's already contacted the hotel about. his key of course you would obviously. thank you Bobby this [ __ ] [ __ ]. didn't do that no he decides he decides. I'm just going to take a car to the. hotel cuz I'm pretty sure it's there not. checking his own backpack on his person. wait check not checking his own backpack.
on his person gets off of our flight. doesn't take our flight books another. flight pays for a flight to go to LAX. instead of to go to Burbank and what. happens. Dumbo okay well first of all he found. the keys in his bag I know that the keys. run his bag the whole time I have a new. backpack I'm not familiar with all the. crevices how deep they go I was rifling. the whole car ride and I couldn't find. them well then you know what if it's too. many carasses we need to get you a a a. one bag Kass which is a purse we're. getting you a purse for the next tour. and all your stuff is going in one bag.
is this Fair yeah yeah you're getting a. purse that's fair to be honest Bobby. when he heard this story said you. sometimes lose kiss in your backpack me. no him Bobby oh that night before Bobby. left Long Beach I I don't I went back in. the room and I said Jesse there's a. there's a charge in one of the rooms is. that yours said no it's Bobby's I think. he's about to leave can you grab oh I. cannot. went I can oh my God dud we can't air.
this podcast we can't air this podcast. because I'm about to go off now light. all right hey guy light him up let me. say something guy all right light him up. did I leave did he leave you were about. to leave no it wasn't I you you were. like oh my God like you like don't. talking me like that I'm your boss you. said don't talk like that I'm your boss. all right number one I was out there. smoking a cigarette with friends I. haven't left yet you had all your stuffy. can I say this too you [ __ ] box you. [ __ ] rarm.
okay my car was right there yeah what. what happened is this oh my keys are. back in there yep what's the big deal. yep did I go to the airport and forget. it no no you didn't you didn't have to. cuz I was there no you weren't there to. save me you what no you weren't save you. you didn't save [ __ ] dude and here's. another thing you didn't save your job. you're fire you piece of [ __ ] lat how. could you talk to me like that honestly. you white [ __ ] dude it is the whites.
it's the whites you would not talk to. Andrew that way no be honest with you no. and let me say something the the little. relationship that you and I had is now. separate it's gone it didn't exist great. [ __ ] you made for and let me see I was. nice to your [ __ ] parents yeah he. right your farmer parents like hey man. you know mean you know they oh this is. what outside of the woods looks like I'm. like yeah welcome well the one thing you. did like about his dad was he talked.
about those big watermelons he was like. the big watermelons out there yeah got. to cut them down is that a start do. value it is yeah okay stop come on it's. a fun fun it's a fun fun anyway get back. off the post any let's go so get back. off the post. so and Andre oh let's go back to this. Andreas [ __ ] you too dude oh I like this. I yeah I just said to just to make mcon. feel better I go we sometimes I lose my. keys in my bag just to make him feel. better right but you just Ed it against.
to me make look like me look like fool. no just to how sympathetic you are say. that in the mic what did he say I don't. even know but I think it's a [ __ ] bad. thing yeah me too it was just to show. how sympathetic you are oh oh I see I. thought you said pathetic I thought you. said pathetic too and I was about to go. rage yeah man I was hoping I was like. dude this going to be get good might. break a. neck it's 2024 now so let's talk about. something important yep if you get. injured by a person place or thing and. you deserve to get paid right yeah you. do life can be crazy sometimes andreww.
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just start some boundaries I'm going to. start some boundaries with everyone in. this room right now okay you're fine. thank you I love you I love you too man. thank you you're welcome dude I'm glad. we're back get rid of these guys no the. boundary is this I think I've been too. nice I pinch your. ass do I pinch your ass in a loving way. what's so funny man loving way just the. ass pinching yeah I don't do it like a. rub like a sexual I just pinch it I know. I saw you. what a cutie Spanish right you Mone dude.
I I swear to god dude it's going to take. a while for you to get back. mhm take it back what you said but don't. say. anything but take it back but don't say. a word very good good Carlos I don't. know what you. did you did good thank you man Carlos. has stepped up a lot by the way goop the. goop when he got off stage let's talk. about the goop did you see what he came. up to me and he I said goop man you did. so good and he goes thank you Andrew I I.
just and um and then he pulls out of his. pocket a pack of sour skittles yeah I. did and I said is that your little. celebration Skittles and he said well. not till I don't have to talk anymore. because I don't want my mouth to get cut. when I'm still here he just lied to you. why he ate him there no what the. Skittles were a fallback plan what do. you mean to his act Is that real yeah he. goes I'm bringing Skittles up here. because um if I'm bombing I can eat the.
Skittles and I go it's a prop he go yeah. I really love that guy right and since. he killed he didn't need to use it so he. lied to you dude wow dude that's two. lies out of the goop oh yeah two lies. dude well hold on Lance oh my God oh my. God I can't believe it I thought you. were kidding that you got Lance and I. was like okay look we have to tell I'll. tell our audience we have uh a guest on. the show today who uh I met at the. comedy store I'm kind of a fan of a new. fan never really met him you guys have.
never met I'm a fan of the albums all. right come uh Lance can you please come. in here and uh take a seat down there. great to see you man great it's great to. see you live. man which one blue or blue is fine yeah. blue Blue's good blue unless you want. pink you like pink BL BL blue is good. right yeah it's good put on your. headphones there Lance if you don't mind. oh. [ __ ] you have water uh yeah we have. water man yeah man demand pretty quick I. know it's just it's standard as all it's.
probably a water right by your foot. there Lance okay cool wow thanks man I. fan too dude you seen it yeah no for. real no you in lot of stuff yeah what. have you seen him in that you like new. sex city that one yeah yeah yeah that. one what else you don't have to put. those on if you don't want no I put them. on I Pro man I do podcast I know how it. work yeah yeah yeah do you have your own. podcast yeah no I don't I used to back. in the day but then I got close on a. holay job so I to delete delete delete.
you know paper trail you seem pro Israel. to me W bro out the gate dude what out. the gates oh out the gate let let me. Thrive before cancel all right give me a. minute outside of our show in Long Beach. there was a pro pales March and half of. the fans said they couldn't get through. the traffic I know to get in were you. down there by any chance Perhaps Perhaps. I don't want to yeah I don't want to. ruffle those feathers so I've seen you. at the comedy store you're a pretty. funny guy thanks um on your way up. you've only been doing it for how long I. mean I'm I'm there on my way up you.
think you're oh you're you're way on. your why am I here if I'm on my way up. why am I here well I mean I'm doing this. as a little bit of no I know I'm just. saying I kind of arrived it's pretty. cool right this is cool this is cool but. how long how long have you been doing. standup well I don't like his energy. right now it's a little aggressive it's. a little aggressive yeah yeah but this. come back in maybe what did redo come in. yeah yeah redo it. do it man I'm so comfy right now all. right well L stay there then maybe I.
marinate on it and then if I want to. redo I redo all right you could redo it. yeah okay what if I coming it's even. cockier you go see if we can do that. maybe oh I can go [ __ ] yeah go [ __ ] that. was me raining it in Bobby okay let me. see what that me being humble coming in. I want to see what you want to do you. probably dancing huh me no filter yeah. yeah me no filter [ __ ] coming in we. don't want to filter we want you to be. free you are okay here we. go you ask I put a limiter on it but you. go go full Lance all.
right ladies and gentlemen our guest. Lance canopis is here yeah let's where. the [ __ ] do you want me to sit all right. Lance uh maybe sit down in the blue. chair there yeah yeah wow. wow wow so my childhood growing up it. was. tough do you have a power raid I went. power raid this time I was being humble. going water we don't have power sorry.
where did you grow up Lance I don't I. don't really say where where I grow up. okay you know I'm not doing like a. oneman show who give a [ __ ] tell some. jokes you know yeah yeah wow and then. then then my dad told me who give a [ __ ]. what's funny yeah I don't care about. your bio I don't want a spotlight of you. on stage and then this happened to me so. when you see Comics you don't like them. when they get personal and talk about. their own l no I go who give a [ __ ] from. the back right cuz I'm up next Everyone. crying right so you like to talk just.
just jokes people eating chinger chicken. fingers chingers what you frean SL yeah. where did my [ __ ] water go dude he. just called me a chinger dude and I. don't like it I love it did you hear it. yeah chinger chinger yeah I'm I'm not a. chinger I spill a little that is I'm a. chinga. chinga yeah that's like Mexican stuff. anyway Chingo or ch ch it's probably a. food yeah it's a good food Lance what um. how long have you been doing stand-up.
Lance not long dude maybe what 5 years. or do you have any material out do you. have specials I don't have material I. just show up other cuz I do Comedy Store. you guys do comedy store right people go. up there and they go I've been having. problem with my girlfriend lately and I. see this [ __ ] talk about his. problem with his girlfriend yeah he onto. like girlfriend number three doing same. joke cuz jokes still work so he doing he. doing pretend what like pretend.
extemporaneous who are you saying this. about specifically every comic really. every comic on stage saying this just. happened to me or I you ever notice this. every night they do it Bobby Le Bobby. Bobby Le do it yeah sorry you know go. ahead Dig N you do you do um but I I. just show up I go up I start dancing for. a minute they play club music I dance. for a minute set the tone I've seen it. yeah and then it's fun and then I just. do Q&A from the audience I go anybody. have any questions for me Lance do you.
there's a rumor and you can squash this. if this isn't true I'm not gay I know. well well can we just form our I just. want to squash form our own opinions. though okay yeah but what what do you. have beef with Bill bur somebody said. you have like big beef with him uh not. big beef slight beef what what do you. want to tell us what happened I mean. there's a great way to kind of get it. out just I fist bump you know and maybe. he moving too fast to not see the bump. oh so you punched him I didn't punch no. I want I do respect fist bump I like.
what he doing I like how he trash women. sometime the rumor is that you sometimes. he doesn't trash wom the rumor is you. hit him a little bit what like I bnch. him that's what's going around the store. people are saying that you assaulted. when I say trash woman I mean. respectfully you know when they need to. be knocked down a pet right right right. right not like yeah not Andrew Tate. although you know that's cool sometimes. you know like I don't like all his video. but some video you go you got a point. you know like would never at a party be. like hey everybody check this out but.
when you in your car you go yeah you. bring up a point are you a citizen here. in the United States or no you know I'm. here could you vote I in theory would. you vote in November I would love to. vote yeah who would you vote for you. think. uh the pause says everything yeah it's. tough though cuz Biden or Trump pretty. much right RFK basically RK Nikki. Haley's probably not g to run you're. going to do RFK I have no idea. who who do you think You' vote for. Alliance it's tough cuz Biden not great.
Trump not great RFK is a new Option yeah. right now yeah but he too small time. maybe you could run I the America not. ready cuz I don't want to get a haircut. or anything I don't want to you don't. have to cut your hair but as a president. what would you be what what like laws. would you enact okay so if you are if. you're in a Drive-Thru for in andout and. your car is in traffic yeah you no you. go to jail wait wait what do you mean. traic. you have to be in the parking lot in and. out is yeah yeah yeah yeah cars okay.
mean what you're saying is this now. again so sometimes the one on Sunset all. of them sometimes there's so many fat. people who need in and out so bad right. and they clock up sunset or orange what. I'm saying is it's it's not going to. happen to you today all right go to. Burger King go to when they willing to. be in traffic. with and and they about to die they. about to get T-boned by car because. they're so fat and want to be in a. Drive-Thru yeah yeah I would get rid of. those people okay that's a good law so.
first order of business your. Administration that's the first law that. we I would drop a bomb on the the the. the uh the traffic okay you know if you. are inside the parking lot you're safe. the shrapnel won't get you I got to know. that can I be your vice president cuz I. have a law please what is your law right. Chick-fil-A you open on Sundays yeah. yeah I know you're Christian right and I. know you have morality and a value open. on Sundays you live in America yeah like. Hindu people can operate it on that day. right. D it's so brilliant job Creator right.
that's so brilliant yeah are and if you. love Jesus you stay home and you you. have atheist you have wicens and stuff. operate yeah warlock you have a warlock. do you have any redheaded people in. where you where you come from have you. ever associated with redheads at all or. even do you know anything about Asian. people it's very rare I mean I don't see. a lot of you see we see you yeah what do. we do there from where you're from uh. laundry stuff oh so like here oh here. still no but like from where you're from.
back from this magical place where. you're from you see people that look. like me what do we do there yeah some. laundries um one guy have. GameStop oh there's a game he run gam he. was doing laundry but he made enough. money to follow his passion of video. game wow he still has the gam stop out. there okay good yeah what did you do. before you did standup what I do just. odd job stuff task rabbit you know. building. Furniture um a little modeling here and. there you were a model yeah some model. stuff like at leisure so I wear the.
jogging suit and then for like what for. for Lulu Lemon or one of those or lower. brand you know yeah not Lulu Lulu was. like Pinnacle yeah but cheetah was. pretty good get for me like Champion. something like no Champion really good. too no cheat like cheetah sweatpants oh. cheetah sweatpants yeah cheetah. sweatpants pretty good high Siera High. higher yeah one time there's a small. like small Time Gym you ever see people. like a wallpaper on the gym of like a. guy doing a squat mhm I was a squat guy. oh wow just to like show form mhm yeah.
so how long have you been in the states. a while now man I'm pretty assimilated. like I know I know lingo I know stuff. like what like what like what give me a. say what lingo I you know ick ick is a. good one yeah yeah girls have ick yeah. yeah what is that you know like a. chick's fat or something yeah it's like. a ick it's one of my icks that's one of. your XS yeah I don't give me a list of. Lance's icks uh weird face well who does. anybody in here have a weird face no.
pretty good he's a little weird but he. have glasses yeah nobody he's good. pretty good faces yeah here you're. hiding can I see your face a little more. holy [ __ ]. H yeah yeah but pretty standard face. good yeah he have he have a lot of. accessories going on like mustache he's. like biting a little a little bit my my. my face you have great face man oh. you've always thought that thank you. like very castable I could put you in. everything like I see you I picture you.
handing a beer to your white best. friend right yeah no no like sure but. like a commercial too like a Michelob. Ultra right he he kind of have a long. jog so let's do that commercial so. you're he is the white friend this is. the commercial right here yeah yeah yeah. so he's doing something you ran five. miles before you know just to get your. heart rate up and then but you're still. a fit guy you know you still like beer. even though you you run a lot right and. at the very end of the commercial here I.
show yeah yeah yeah oh perfect thank you. yeah the smile maybe a bit. match it seem like you have like mental. thre me because well you is is that your. natural cuz it seem like you have mental. problems you when you smile like that. all right so just direct me so that was. too much director yeah little the smile. another shot ready so he just won so. you're wiped you've done your run and. but you still want a beer I love a beer. I'm so tired from that run here comes. your boy okay why are you looking at me. yeah yeah you look my bad my bad give.
him a line at least yeah yeah uh a line. will probably help the Rhythm I think it. would help me this should quench your. thirst and get you [ __ ] up okay ready. yeah yeah yeah oh man what a long run. I'd really love a beer this should. question your thirst get you really. [ __ ] up yeah well he kind of bobbled. the line up top give me can you ADR it. or no I do it again right I'll you mouth. it I do the I do the line for you oh. okay I ADR I do ADR on the spot here we. go man I'm really tired of that run I.
love a beer this should quench your. thirst it'll get you [ __ ]. up print it check the gate wow that was. pretty good pretty good thank you films. from when we were in our youth all the. films that were dubbed over yeah these. will your thirst yeah are you a fan of. Cinema I love Cinema dude like my dream. you know we meet at comedy store and you. see me rip and [ __ ] and like okay I do I. mean the the the building.
shakes it does it does Shake yeah you. saw Shake I seen Shake yeah there's this. Heckler video and there's footage it was. an earthquake at the same time no no. give me credit come on all right yeah. and I just didn't know how you got that. Camel up on stage that was amazing yeah. yeah get a full-blown camel on stage. it's a tough closer to do every time. yeah I go good luck following that yeah. well the amount of water that comes out. of that thing is absurd it's absurd. the and then have it. disappear yeah it's a little kind of um.
I don't want to give away his act on. this I know but it's still Inc I don't I. don't even do that bit that much anymore. so the cam pit yeah all right you don't. not anymore really I've seen you do it. five times where where do I store no not. you don't do it at the store anymore but. you caring Hall we saw you do that you. closed with the camer yeah but then. David Copperfield is like I do a similar. thing and so I have to St and to juggle. three quala bears is I mean I've just I. just don't they're a lot and they all. have herpes cuz koalas they all have. herpes you have to dodge you have to.
like Dodge their lips when you're. juggling them incredible work thanks man. thank you yeah but yeah I want to get. into Cinema like I want to be in action. movies it's my dream wow I would do a. romcom to like whatever I got to do to. build my way up well let me see how. about this I'd like to see your cast. ability because we are making a movie. right now yeah why don't you show me if. you're the love interest for Bobby uh. bobb's a sweet little lady and you're. obviously you uh I'd like to see you. know you flirting with with her at a bar. to try to see if I could put you in our. movie we do have a scene where you know.
we have a scene we need a guy that's. flirting with this girl and they end up. getting into a big fight scene. physically but let's just see you flirt. and see if it works sure sure so we're. at a bar yeah you're at a bar it's. actually it's in uh it's in New York. it's uh it's in the village it's kind of. a hip cool young bar uh she's a NYU grad. student okay how how old is she grad. student she's 23 23 23 years old and TI. wasy huh tight [ __ ] it's pretty tight. yeah from what it looks well it's you.
know hold on I'm sorry um it's just I. don't want people to talk to about my. [ __ ] no it's tight it is tight it is. tight it's tight all right I mean it's. not why wouldn't you want it to be tight. why are you throwing away tight [ __ ]. okay fine it's just all right let's go. and her name is uh Camille Cam and uh. let's uh let's see how this takes place. go ahead and action rocket money you. know I have so many subscriptions to a. million different things I'm losing. money all the time. and I need one um or website to put it.
all in one place yes well luckily rocket. money is a personal finance app that. finds and cancels your unwanted. subscriptions monitors your spending and. helps lower your bills so you can grow. your savings I can't tell you before I. use this how much money I was spending. it was embarrassing and stupid I would. sign up for something and I totally. forget about it that happens all the. time and now you can sub you can see all. your subscriptions in one place and if. you see something you don't want rocket. money can help you cancel with a few. Taps I've always struggled with finding. time to manage my finances Andrew know. and and and at the end of a busy week.
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you sign up at box ofawesome.com and. enter the code bad friends at checkout. that's box ofawesome.com. code bad friends for free mystery gift. with your first monthly shipment box. ofawesome.com codee bad. friends Camille right yeah how' you know. just your reputation procedure oh really. um you mean at law school yeah and. everywhere oh thank you how many years. what's your name oh I my my name is. Lance Lance oh I think I've heard of you.
Lance can't stop a US hopefully all good. things holy [ __ ] yeah so I need legal. help okay I hit a guy with my car yeah. yeah what would you do it was totally my. fault but I needed to not appear so I'm. sorry what did the police show up you. call the authorities I ran you ran I ran. so there's probably a warant out for. your arrest perhaps but trying to get. ahead of it okay you get okay but aside.
from that did he die. maybe okay well I didn't really stick. around to find out all right but let's. table what I told you okay I want to. [ __ ] you. tonight oh wow what a. turn are you okay no I'm sorry I just. you know can we get her some water no I. fine I got water right here um what a. switch though that was really fast um I. move fast I see something I like. you went from your a wanted fugitive and.
then you went a [ __ ] yes okay well let's. let's deal with the first problem first. and then maybe I'll think do you like. loose [ __ ] they're not. ideal mine's very I've had five. kids what it's loose it's pretty. loose bye hi I'm John kones from what. would you do we just did a scene from. what would you do yes and you you failed.
I did yeah okay you were going to have. sex with Lance I was yes bad okay why. bad girl why he's a fugitive he murdered. he murdered people shut your mouth you. want to be added to the list w wow great. Lance I apologize very good skill set is. pretty incredible yeah I feel my range. is pretty I can do high octane like get. on a motorcycle but then I can bring it. down and tell you I like to tight [ __ ]. are you a single guy yeah I'm always. you've never been in a relationship no. sometimes it Veer that way where they.
kind of want that and then I get very. busy what do you get busy doing you know. work what are you doing working you know. writing acting when's the last just. nebulous stuff where they can't keep. tabs you know like I don't work in the. yeah you know like when you're an artist. you go oh my process and then they have. to respect the process you do have to. respect and then if they get really. really upset I just say baby you're my. muse and then they like because they. have no Talent themselves right so they. are attra like to know that my jokes and.
my art come from me being bad to them is. alluring to them like that's why Picasso. you know Picasso had so many chicks and. stuff I just don't think you have a lot. of range what the [ __ ] yeah give me what. do you mean I don't think give range and. I just want to do a different movie. scenario if I may yeah okay like dear. Daniel de leis no we're on a different. planet and we're a different we're an. alien species right so CGI yeah we some. CGI but I'm an alien creature this it's. like Star Trek 9 right all right and.
you're playing an alien okay okay and. we're the same scenario we're at a bar. okay so you're you're coming to me I. have a drink. right holy [ __ ] he has it wow dude he. has the R so good dude that sounds like. a camel did that get you horny yeah I. did wow you would have to but you would. have to do subtitle because that was. gibberish like didn't speak a real thing. yeah and I wasn't either [ __ ] face it. sold it sold me yeah it sold it Lance.
let me let me ask you these was real. language you seem to be you seem to be. connected to the universe that we live. in you know a lot of people that I know. although a lot of people don't know you. well what are some comedians if we name. comedians cuz I know I said you had be. you had a little bit of beef n slight. beef you're trying to stir pot between. you know biggest guy in comedy and me. right now no I'm not doing it I just. people said that b you and B there who. do you where where you say like it's. trending or something it's just a fist. pomp that you know miscommunication all.
right let me name some comics and see if. you have an association with them at all. okay is that fine yeah okay how about um. how about Jessel Nick Jessel Nick yeah I. know of him no beef with him no beef you. like I like his style you think he's. cool yeah he wear jean jacket too what. about get it what about Spade you like. David Spade love Spade longevity right. great chicks great with chicks what. about uh fem you know fem anoir you like. him. n he's he's okay I guess or why did you.
pause why he all right he kind of you. know what I talking about like he has a. great special coming out that's great he. does he's putting in a special right now. yeah where is it where is it going to. be what do you mean where's it going to. be what's the home Netflix no it's it's. going to be on uh it's going to be on. YouTube it's called House Money ohone. YouTube February 28th can't anyone. upload on YouTube yeah oh yeah but. that's not let's not talk [ __ ] you don't. have a special on YouTube so I don't. need to every time I go on stage it's. special okay I highly doubt that no for.
real ask audience just the the building. I know but I'm saying you can't take. shots of people that have been in comedy. for a long time that are doing [ __ ] and. you you haven't proven yourself yet I. mean maybe not on large scale but. anybody who know comedy and [ __ ] know. Lance is [ __ ] you know on the rocket. ship success I don't know we've asked a. lot of people I don't I would say some. people know who you are but I think you. need to be humbled a little bit all. right yeah I take your note I take your. note but you know fim right I know of. right so you've talked to him about the. house money have you no we haven't.
talked about say [ __ ] yes maybe I. don't know yeah. sure yeah great special yeah yeah yeah. it's a great special right I I've never. seen it it's say February who's going to. watch it yeah I mean I mean I will watch. I watch it too you you friends love he's. my oldest friend in comedy I met him. when we when we both came when I was out. here and we started together so that's. why I don't want you to disrespect sure. sure N I hope to I hope have a YouTube. special someday too listen I see that. you're being kind no I'm being real I.
don't like it I I want one don't. disrespect my friend okay I'm not you're. on our show I don't like that kind of. borry sorry dude I'm sorry well I mean. come on anoir is one of the best comics. on planet or I believe he used to open. for you he used to open for me and he is. a sweet kid you could see his talent. from just the first time you see him. sounds like he's dying no he's not dying. he's not Lance yeah yeah yeah Lance do. does. he he's the sweetest kid the left side.
of his face is and we're just proud of. the guy you know we are well that's cool. you know when I do a special someday you. guys you give me this type of thing. maybe we'll see I mean look if you kind. of stay in your lane that's what we like. to say here in the stay in my Lane yeah. don't don't don't step on toes again. let's not step on toes yeah their. hierarchy their respect you know that's. what CU I'm so new to standup you know. I'm only five years in and I don't. realize that there is like it's like the. mob you got to pay your dues you got to. kiss certain people kiss the ring yeah. you can't you can't like talk about.
certain people certain way they're. secret cow it's just rude yeah rude it's. rude it's rude yeah but in hip-hop you. take shots at people then you become. [ __ ] yeah but were you ever a hip-hop. artist no I love it though you do big. fan of Hip Hop who who do you listen to. right now I mean Kanye oh that's a tough. one no good well no no it's his talent. is there I just think publicly he's. having a tough time sure sure but I mean. you could play his music to the most. Jewish person and he's. still even with with the curls and the.
yamaka you be [ __ ] wow yeah yeah. Yeezy still comfy you know and what you. learned out of dance is that improvised. it's improvised I'm glad you asked glad. I did too yeah I just music come on and. then I kind of black out like I go into. a Fugue state or something and and I'm. not even dancing I'm a vessel for. whatever the music is and this is how. you get laid typically typically no. words just you know if at the club or a. rave or something and the music. come yeah and after I'm done you know.
I'll be honest I think I dance pretty. good I maybe can you critique some of my. movies sure sure all right oh my God. what is this so let I'm going just do. maybe some dancing maybe. [Music]. see oh get ready for the B to drop Bobby. [Music]. oh [ __ ] the drop before the.
drop check his check his vitals. everybody oh yeah put it in the. air holy. [ __ ] wow one thing I will say you think. what do you think what do you guys think. he feels it not good no that's no I. think it's very good. also what I like be real no I just I.
took a risk no it was a really good risk. curious what were the sounds you making. my emotions that's pure emotion I think. the risk was cardiovasular it actually. hurt yeah I could tell so the emotion of. pain well yeah my my body hurt Lance do. you think you can upstage him I mean no. well no no no upstage bad word because. that was uniquely Bobby yeah thank you. when you go to a club not one other. person will be doing that right. they should well if you open up a class. and you want to if you want to impart.
that to other people well that was P. purely improvised improvised yeah I. could tell well what song do you what. song would you prefer to get down to uh. choose an do you have more royalty free. music he always yeah that's what he's. yeah cuz I don't like popular stuff. other than Kanye you know right all. right let's hear something else let's. see if it. gets cuz I've been living life right. like I could just die any minute go P. right down the side PC country limit I. don't need a guide all the lights take.
me where I want to visit are you alive. all just. breathing cuz I've been living life. right like I could just die any minute. going for right down the side PC country. limit I don't need a guide for the. lights take me where I want to visit are. you alive all just. breathing flashing red lights driving at. night windowless ride feeling alive. nothing in sight forever in Flight.
follow those lines will make it this. time blurry street lights work as a GU. to memories that we're making tonight oh. yeah we'll make it. tonight yeah I do anything that I feel. like I want to do I'm living life like I. got nothing left to prove [ __ ] I magic. miked you at the end you magic M my. mouth yeah so you know thank thanks so. wasc ible dude but yeah you you know. that wasn't prepared mine out n leave it.
mine suck no yours was good I was like. but you make cool noises I thought it. was really you know I was sucked man I. didn't dance at all dude no you did no. but to do you know mean I I love all. that but what's great about yours cuz. like I was doing a lot of movement I'm a. disaster n you're you're like no do it's. was like a master going up no you're. like knives in I'm a fool I'm a fool. you're knives in right now I thought it. looked good it was good compared to that. no no no no no no no Bobby Bobby what. the [ __ ] Bobby he difference I was.
moving around a lot yeah but you you had. suspense yes oh I see stationary. suspense so it's it's suspense the. movement without movement wow yeah right. and that's important but I was okay. because it's it's uh I was doing a lot. right I was doing little but a lot yes. you're doing a lot little Litt you're. doing a lot with a little also if I do. that at the club I get sweaty very fast. yeah and then my chances are [ __ ] go.
down right you're not going to be. sweating as much doing what you do but. but but can I say something I'll be real. too when I was watching your dance I. could feel my [ __ ] tighten yeah but. you're not the mar you're not my market. audience saying that my [ __ ] got real. tight did you not I think the whole. Market got tight yeah the market. whatever your Market is that market got. tight yeah I was like a virgin oh okay. so that's good then yeah that's a good. thing yeah not for you yeah for cuz I. sometimes when when too tight then it's. like you don't want it so tight you. can't get in okay yeah okay anyway yeah.
okay I understand all right consent. consent not you know like we we. understand no no no you know what I mean. like we understand what you're saying. yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah it. goes without saying. consent yeah yeah yeah yeah I big. consent I love no no no we know we know. yeah but when you say it so much yeah. but I just like to reiterate that yeah I. for that it goes with let's just move on. maybe move on yes we AG we agree we. agree to disagree anyway can I ask you a.
question yeah um do you dance I don't I. don't okay yeah I I could tell that but. I I I can try yeah please I would love. cuz like we both kind of bore our soul. right here yeah I can yeah you can stand. I just have to feel the music I guess oh. I guess yeah yeah you go clubbing us. sometime together uh maybe maybe yeah. [Music].
so. [Music]. good. yeah it's. got yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah. [Music]. yeah so it's so good it's so good oh my. God it's less is more right oh my god oh.
that was so come on CL was so good that. is pretty good it's almost as if he. didn't dance I thought it was building. up you move people to tears to tears I. don't want to be I'm a little. embarrassed I just don't ever really. dance much but yeah it it interesting. because it seem it's like build up but. that that it you know like you think. it's building up to a drop no no yeah. like you're all buildup which is great. that's great yeah do you have any notes. I mean I'm just trying there's no notes.
D not no notes bro okay kind of angry at. the beginning kind of upset and hitting. the table yeah it was almost like you. you got bad news in the morning right or. got told he had to stay late you woke up. and your uncle jack died right and. you're just kind of like my uncle jack. died I've never danced in front of. people I've just that's the first time. I've ever Dan I you know to be honest. with you I'm embarrassed about mine why. no yours good dude mine was too much it. was the opposite of his I I went all.
climax there was no buildup but that's. okay other CHS sometimes I you don't. need foreplay I mean I wish I could. learn how to do that style I got to be. honest that's unteachable that kind of. stuff that's what I thought gathered. yeah that'd be great if you do open up a. class like dance class yeah yeah with a. rolling chair and a desk and all these. like hot chicks are learning I mean I. would do it if I mean I would just have. to some business investors to get that. kind of thing off the ground that'd be. do you have the time to do that even you. seem kind of busy with no no I have a. lot of time I don't have much going on I. think I got it yeah yeah that's part of.
it that's part I think I got it got. it I kind of want to learn too yeah. let's learn it learn it and then you do. you do this a lot uh just kind of to get. me inol in the mo. yeah. oh push push that's your signature move. my instinct he just shoots like. lightning bols I try to do what you do. but I just my instincts goes there it.
was too. much I think you're right no I like it. yeah I couldn't stay in that pocket it's. discipl it's a discipline what you did. was a discipline it's a it's a it's all. I've ever known so that's all you need. to know that's all I need to know yeah. that's all you need stay deep in the wow. dude with that kind of stuff incredible. dude I really can't go. further yeah that is amazing dude thank. you guys for sharing your dance thank. you yeah oh my God I feel like you know. you came in here really hot heavy and I. think the bonding is stronger after to.
be real when I knew you part of it you. know I scared you're scared of us oh I'm. scared too well you know yeah yeah you. put on a Bravado to protect you from. being injured or hurt a person. anyway special oh yeah you want to plug. a special again yeah what's it called. again I I have no idea oh house money. everybody watch fim special house money. it's on YouTube 28th and it's going to. be great that's our boy he's our boy and. I want to thank Lance can stop us for.
coming to the podcast thank you so much. you learned so much can you say this to. the camera Lance thank you for being a. bad friend oh I would love to what. camera you want that that one right in. front of you that's facing you and that. what What's My. Line thank you for being a bad friend. thank you for being a bad friend thank. you for being a bad friend but look in. there yeah do here. yeah thank you for being a bad friend. [Music]. you know what let me do that's pretty. good I'll do the voice and you do the oh.
yeah okay so like repeat from ready one. 2 three thank you for being a b friend. let me try ready one two 3 thank you for. being a bad friend. man let's try again yeah go ahead me. again. yeah you don't have to say man at the. end but that's can do yeah go ahead. thank you for being B friend wowow let. me try one more.
okay thank you for being a b. friend good you do one thank you for. being a be friend all right I'll do one. ready thank you for being a bad. friend all right that's good now one. more come on he's going to keep doing. this all night thank you being. best ready. yeah thank you for being a bad. [Music].
friend okay good thank you L thank you. guys thank you I love you so much. [Music].
