Andrew's Airplane Emergency | Ep 220 | Bad Friends

you two are bad friends who are these. two idiots a white dude and an Asian. dude you two are. disgusting you two are something we're. bad friends I dude I was. so worried about you thank you. baby thought you were going to die I. definitely thought I was going to die I. can do the quickest version of the story. no we want the slow version slogan well. first of all welcome back fancy B from.

y yay second of all my agents call me. they go you're not doing it and I go. what what the zombie movie oh his movie. and I go I have to do it you cannot do. it I've never I've never I've never seen. my agents call me and just and just beg. me not to do a movie did they read the. script yeah they let the script they. they saw the no money right Spain years. a lot of things ler yeah there's not. really a lot of incentive to do it I. read it on the plane and that's why I.

had a medical emergency because I was. reading I'm doing it anyway I know I. love you so I get a text. message I get a text message from Jesse. our old friend jety. right it says oh my God I can share the. photo oh my God I'm on a plane and. Andrew Santino just overdosed okay I. know but okay not just that yeah I get a. call from TM Z they called my agents.

yeah right and TMZ is like is he is he. alive you didn't answer the did you. answer the phone yeah yeah what are you. why are you answering the phone I go. who's alive yeah who's alive your boy we. heard drugs and this that I go it's. crazy no what no right it was. diarrhea it diarhea right it was. diarrhea do you fainted on the plane. though kills people every year which. kills a lot of people 5,000 people in.

First World countries by the way 200,000. over uh globally uh it how does diarrhea. kill you what you dehydration drink. water you can no dude when I have. diarrhea I I drink water while I'm doing. diarrhea to replenish right then 1.5. million people died from diarrhea dis. 2019 that's so many so here's what. really happened I didn't overdose and. also we apologized already to the fans. of Abu Dhabi I was advising oh my God. I'm so sorry I'm sorry we couldn't go so.

so I was sick in Nashville right. Saturday I didn't feel that good. Saturday late show okay no booze no. nothing nothing just eat a meal not. feeling right go to bed Sunday morning I. wake up back up back up back up yeah. what's the feeling how do I start what. what's the beginning of it no no what. I'm saying is is that I'm not feeling. right I want to be specific because I. want to know if I have those symptoms. what to do okay so well I'll tell you. not what not to do don't get on a flight. all right juy farts no it's not farts.

yet okay so what started as nausea up. high high in my throat and then foggin. oh my so on the second show on Saturday. night I felt like the set was good but. you know when you're there but you're. you're like I'm I'm on autopilot I was. on autopilot I was just kind of doing. the jokes but I was like I feel so weird. I go back to the hotel that night I sit. in bed can't go to sleep super nauseous. I go to the bathroom take a shower come. out real nauseous achy strange go to. sleep Sunday morning I wake up to go.

golfing with court Macau the whole. morning I feel like I'm going to throw. up the whole time feel like I'm going to. throw up I feel wozy and out of it I'm. eating and drinking you know I'm having. like healthy stuff nothing crazy then s. then Sunday night I get back to the. hotel I call Lucy at Nashville zany and. I said something's wrong I don't even. know if I could do the shows like I feel. awful dud why do you do a Sunday show I. did two Sunday shows for the fans baby.

okay so I get I she says I'll get you an. IV she calls Nate bargaz sister who was. an angel who came through with her. friend who got does mobile IVs are they. hot in between shows none of your. business don't say that that's our. friend's sister Oh no just not not. Nate's but it's Nate sister not the. other one the girl who administered the. IV. yeah okay just move on okay okay it's. fine okay okay so then I get the IV in. between the shows yeah it it's not. working like I get a boost of energy for. the second show can I tell you something.

but I feel dog [ __ ] I'm sweating I'm. vibrating can I interject something I. know it's your story but I want to. interject gone yeah it's not funny what. I'm about to say is not going to no mine. has not been funny I love it though okay. go ahead yeah it's very interesting yeah. I knew something was wrong because you. called me on stage I did yeah and. usually when he calls me on stage it's. what's up uhhuh I'm doing a show this. time he's on stage there's a crowd. behind him he's like hey.

and I so in my mind I'm like oh he's not. doing a shell he's calling me off I was. so out of it he was out I was there was. something wrong but I'll tell you why. there was a weird Omen in the air a guy. oh [ __ ] Damien was there Damen was there. oh [ __ ] 666 on his dangling his penis. fingers all over the. crowd that's not Daman that's Casper oh. that's Casper up in the balcony of zany. in the middle of my show no a guy passes. out medical emergency medical emergency. how weird is this second show first show.

second show oh no medical emergency. they're yelling and our good buddy great. great musician Noah Khan came with his. never heard of him really one of the. biggest musicians right now you don't. know who Noah Khan is he's [ __ ]. massive is it Shaka Khan's brother yes. it's shaka's younger brother yeah yeah. yeah he's the man oh I love noan he's. the [ __ ] man anyway in the middle of. the show a medical emergency we stopped. the show I think somebody's dying or. having having a stroke or a heart attack.

or something bad we get through that I. feel like I might have a stroke or heart. attack so it's already this weird Omen. energy I go back to the hotel that night. feeling not good all night long po po po. poop puke poop puke p po not good can I. can I I ask a question in that order po. po po. po puke p po yes okay okay exactly can I. ask another question please what is the.

ratio in terms of puke diarrhea it's 2:1. poop to puke 2: one diarrhea always wins. it always wins it always wins they're. like the Manchester City of whatever. that. is they always win yeah my puke was. Arsenal on I'm sorry so anyway I go to. bed. sweating sweat through the sheet your. body fighting it off oh bu big time I. wake up the next morning and I said get. room service get on the and go home just.

go home I get room service I eat a bite. of a. waffle right back out wow one bite of a. waffle a berry smoothie I figured I. can't eat solid so I'm just going to. chug a smoothie I chug a. smoothie everywhere oh so your poo was. purple it went right through like on. power. wash wow it was Unreal I get to the. airport I'm woozy goozy people are. passing me like best friends and I'm. just like man I'm out of it wow I sit.

down this is an insane story I sit down. on the plane I know this one and I look. to my left there's a bag on my seat it's. like a from somebody bought stuff from. one of the shops and I go whose bag is. this man is this anybody's bag like I'm. tired yeah you know it's right behind me. it's MGK and Megan Fox that's right I. don't even see I didn't even see him I. swear to God I'm so out of it I. literally didn't see the guy and he goes. yo you're the comedian.

Santino yeah right away and I go what's. up he goes yo you're the [ __ ] so now I'm. sick I'm like sick he touched him yeah I. gave him I gave him a dab right now mpk. yeah yeah yeah Megan [ __ ] is everything. okay yeah so MGK is behind me so now I. have to turn you know when you're like. talking to someone behind you you got to. like do the so I'm sitting on the side. because I'm I want to cool and talk to.

him but I can't tell him like Hey dude. I'm so [ __ ] I feel so sick right now. so we're just sharing ComEd he's a huge. comedy fan loves you which is annoying. as [ __ ] uh is a fan of the show like. like name all of our friends we were. talking about Tim Robinson show I think. you should leave we we're just cracking. up sharing stories it was great then. finally I turn back around the flight. starts and in the middle of the flight I. put on my headphones right the thank. shout out to Phoenix standup live gave. me the app.

over their ear Beats okay as a gift. anyway selling out all the. shows okay wait wait wait look stop for. a second did they give you a gift let me. ask you something did they give you a. gift I sold every show too yeah did you. get anything well I did you get a gift. you they gave you what Apple Beats over. the ear headphones all right okay after. your story I'm calling the owner of the. club yeah do it and I'm I have a [ __ ]. issue how much are they 500 bucks was a. they gave you Apple beats stand up live. the I sold out too yeah same one okay. note that go ahead.

I'm mad go ahead it's going to be back. yeah it's good to be back so then I put. on my headphones and I lay down to go to. sleep I miss like the the flight. attendant coming by to like see if I. wanted to eat or drink I'm out I'm cold. I'm out cold right then my body does. this one of those oh and I'm like I'm. gonna throw up I'm gonna [ __ ] throw. up I [ __ ] and dude I get up so fast. my seat belt still on right back on the. seat nobody saw thank God was it like. when remember I sat next to you had. diarrhea same thing same thing same.

feeling been there done that this guy. yeah I get up I rip the seat belt off. she can kind of tell something's up the. way she looked at me Megan Fox. no Megan Fox is paying no attention to. my loser ass just what question they're. behind me is she hot. huh is she hot pretty is Megan Fox hot. look let's move on [ __ ] what the [ __ ]. we talk already already stunning yeah. what yeah dude she could have been. covered in [ __ ] in my [ __ ] I still been. like she. gorgeous yeah I [ __ ] run to the. bathroom I bust in the door and I'm real.

Dizzy cuz my blood pressure must be. super low because I'm sick and I haven't. eaten anything so I close the toilet. seat and I sit down on it because I'm. going to throw up in the sink to the. right of me or to the left of me you. know because I can't even stand up I'm. so weak and then I get really. woozy and. [Music]. then you know you hear the [ __ ] the. TV noise you passed out I fainted I. passed out hard and I woke up I was on. the floor of the bathroom at that point.

which my nightmare my nightmare yeah pee. all you know I wake up sitting on the. floor of the bathroom to the flight. attendant going sir sir sir and it's. kind of like muffled I can't really hear. it how did they open it and I hear no no. the door was oh I'm sorry I'm skipping a. step when I sat down on the seat I. opened the door and I said can I get a. cold towel and she goes sir we're not. supposed to get up right now because the. seat belt sign was on yeah and I said. can I get a cold towel around my neck. and then the door was open at that point. I didn't close it thank and then you. passed out and then I must have fainted.

pants down slum no dude I was fully. clothed I was going to throw up I was. about to throw up so then I pulled them. down after I woke up and they were. giving me metalic attention so I I wake. up I'm I'm sitting on the floor of the. bathroom and I hear her like shaking me. sir sir sir and then I hear another one. going do we have a doctor do we have a. doctor on the plane and I'm kind of. coming to but I can't really come to cuz. I'm like I feel myself like mumbling. embarrassing yeah so embarrassing and I.

look down to my right and I have throw. up everywhere I've thrown up all over. myself like the amount of throw up is. hilarious it's it's like a [ __ ] it's. like a Nickelodeon show was. like they turn on a faucet and she's. trying to help me and then this guy. shows up who's a doctor who's a. psychiatrist but he was a doctor and. he's a psychiatrist but he was a doctor. but he was a psychiatrist he was a. doctor but he was trying to help me out. and she was talking to me and they were. making me chug apple juice and they were.

trying to recount what happened and then. he was like did you take drugs or did. somebody drug you and I was like no no. no no no I'm sick something's wrong I. have like a bug he gives me Naran Naran. for op for people that are [ __ ]. having like an OD opioid opioid OD. shoves it up my nose and he's like. breathe and I was like I don't know if. I'm comfortable with n and then up my. [ __ ] just had Naran on his on him. that they gave him the first aid kit it. has Narcan as an IV bag he just had him. pocket I got eight of them yeah I I can.

spare. one so they Goose me with [ __ ] Naran. he stabs me to give me an IV but the. bag's not working because my positioning. is weird I'm imagine if you had the. stuff remember when Batman the the. Batman yeah at the end when he was. finding the Riddler and his little army. right and he pulls out that green thing. anyway. adrenaline. adrenaline so he Nars me hits me with an. IV the IV BR my vein [ __ ] severs so. the thing is my arms all bruised blood. squirting every blood is all over the.

place I'm sitting in Piss I'm sitting in. piss and puke not my piss just airplane. toilet bathroom piss oh yeah it could be. good. piss you don't know who's pissing is. don't I doubt it okay yeah if it was. Megan Fox's yeah if it was Megan Fox if. it was Megan Fox it would have been fine. yeah yeah I would have taken some home. could I get a can I get a cup a to go. cup so I'm sitting in piss and puke all. over me and then MGK comes walking up oh. here we go this is how cool of a guy. this guy is I'm so embarrassed I'm. sitting there I'm sled in a [ __ ] in.

the airport bathroom oh my God in the. airplane bathroom and he goes you Andrew. are you okay do you want some apple. juice or orange juice and he's got like. both like he bought it from the store. and I go I'm literally like my neck is. craned against the and I go oh thanks mg. very nice of you. man it's so good I'm craned against the. sink I'm tucked against the sink it's so. good and he he goes okay bro and then he. walks away and the flight attendant's. like do you want your phone do you want. to call somebody cuz I'm kind of like.

they're giving me oxygen cuz my my blood. my oxygen level is super low cuz I. passed out wow they take my vitals and. she goes does he know your family uh and. I go we just met she goes you guys seem. like close friends and I was like I he's. just being very nice wears love well you. know. gay um no so then he comes back like 5. minutes later they've got me hooked up. to an oxygen tank to level my to get my. levels right and he's got this sweater. in his hand this is his sweater this is.

MGK sweater he's got it balded up in his. hand and he sees that I'm soiled and he. and and he goes yo do you want my. sweater cuz I had taken my sweater off. cuz they were like take your sweater off. we need to like get you know we need to. be able to take your blood pressure so. take I take my sweater off you can tell. I'm in like a shitty old bed you know. like a night shirt or something and he. goes uh do you want my sweater and I. said no dude I'm going to get it's got I. puke and [ __ ] and he goes I don't. give a [ __ ] and he throws it to me and. he goes keep that [ __ ] dude I don't give.

a [ __ ] he's like he's like get warm and. I almost started crying I was like. MGK like like he threw it to a kid at a. children's hospital thanks MGK so he. gave me his sweater like a [ __ ]. Prince he hasn't even washed that why. would I wash this I didn't get anything. on it. smells bad anyway no i w we wash it when. I got home no I'm not didn't yeah I did. well I I didn't so this was wor on the. earthquake concussion in the bathroom oh.

my god dude I'm telling you right now. that was a good one pretty close that. was a Zinger so then that was very very. very provocative so I'll finish it okay. I get up out they're like can you sit in. your seat at this point I'm fine yeah I. can sit in my seat I'm woozy I'm texting. my [ __ ] wife I'm like you need to. pick me up I cancel my car because I was. like I can't ride in a car cuz I'm still. [ __ ] up I get back in my seat I turn. to MGK and I just go sorry man thank you. you're real one he goes I'm just glad. that you're good and I was like thanks.

and then I just couldn't look at any I. just didn't want to look at anybody I. was so embarrassed you know and I get. off the plane or I we we and then they. say everyone has to stop so the EMTs can. come get me I said for my own. embarrassment can I just get off the. plane I can walk I'll meet them in the. Jet. Bridge if you can walk yeah I grab my. [ __ ] I Sprint up the Jet Bridge I throw. this hoodie over my head and I sit in. the corner as far as I can let the. [ __ ] paramedics do my vitals and take.

care cuz they have to check you out when. you land they're doing the vitals I'm. texting I'm getting binging bing bing. bing text are you dead did you o You're. Dead are you dead yeah people were. hitting someone texted from the flight. Jesse and Carlos and said Santino OD on. my plane they were saying I [ __ ]. overdosed on the flight oh they don't. have the information then TMZ is calling. my agents you yeah I pick up why I love. them no they're my friends they want to.

know what's going on of course I get my. wife picks me up we make it at 5:30 p.m. we're sitting in rush hour traffic holy. [ __ ] and I'm shaking in the front seat. cuz I can't hold it in we get to my. [ __ ] front lawn my hand of God I held. out the moment I open the car. door my neighbor just like hey Andrew. clipping his [ __ ] head I projectile. my dog in the window. wow I'm holding my [ __ ] oh [ __ ] and.

for the next 4 days I know I lost 9 lbs. yeah I was on the. toilet spraying out of my butt I've. never had this kind of it was water. every time I. sat water I had to go to the [ __ ]. doctor twice I know cuz I was like dude. something's wrong bro and my doctor was. like where'd you come from where are you. going I was said Nashville Abu Dhabi he. goes no no. he's like you natur already you did it.

already yeah he was like he's like he's. like he said no to that though you've. been there okay okay okay go go back he. went he goes go back in time and change. it no he was like no more you he's like. you can't travel dude he's like you. cannot be S he's like you need to take a. a break your body he's like even if I. give you [ __ ] he's like you shouldn't be. traveling so it took me four days I. called I called everyone a million times. to say I'm sorry took me four days of. losing 9 lbs you know we were so worried. but now I'm a cutesy pootsie now I'm a. little p girl yeah now I'm a little.

skinny pinup girl and I finally feel. better you know you look like. Philadelphia. dude yeah yeah yeah I mean you look you. look when I just saw and that's the last. time I'll party with Magic Johnson you. know what. magic that's enough wow it was a crazy. story incredible so shout out to MGK for. the sweater that was very nice so we. want to apologize to Abu Dhabi sorry. about that guys who do guys sorry about. that guys Abu Dhabi Abu Dhabi and I know. you guys are mad but there's nothing we. can do there's no way we're going to put. our boy in je I was not allowed to. [ __ ] fly I mean what what's going on.

did we get something so we got something. let's let's see what we got here give it. to me yeah this is straight from uh. UAE oh. no oh no is this real yeah this is this. is bad Bobby Blue Cho this episode is. sponsored by Blue Chu Let's Talk About. Sex baby you want to bring the heat in. the bedroom you know I do now you can't. increase your performance and get that. extra confidence in bed listen up. blue.com blueo is a unique online. service that delivers the same active. ingredients as Viagra Calis and litra.

but in chewable tablets and at a. fraction of the cost Bobby loves blue. chew he loves taking it sometimes middle. of the show a dietary supplement for me. well sometimes you take it cuz you're on. your way after the show to go see. someone see a friend because they don't. hook up with me yeah and then that does. that happens but that's okay too you can. take them any time anywhere day or night. you can plan ahead be ready whenever. opportunity arises and the process is. simple all you have to do is sign up at. blue.com consult with one of their. licensed medical providers once you're. approved which you will be you're going. to receive your prescription within days.

the best part is all done online so no. visits to the doctor's office no awkward. conversations and no waiting in line at. the pharmacy bluechew wants to help you. have better sex okay discover your. options at blue.com chew it and do it we. got a special deal for our listeners try. blue for free come on when you use our. promo code bad friends at checkout just. pay $5 for shipping that's blu.com promo. code is Friends b a d f r i e n DS to. receive your first month free visit blue. for more details and important safety.

information and we thank bluechew for. sponsoring the podcast rocket money hey. man how much you think you're spending. on subscriptions well not anymore. because I was I was losing thousands and. thousands of dollars a year I got on. Rocket money and now my subscriptions. are all done you've got you well you've. whittel it down to what you actually use. exactly thank God I tell you something. most people most of them most people. you're paying for stuff you don't even. know 74% of people have subscriptions. they've forgotten about I did you know. Bobby did yeah and uh thanks to Rocket.

money no longer wasting money on ones I. forgot about dude I had two apps that I. signed up for a photo app that like you. could edit photos or something from like. seven years ago that I was still paying. money on I was paying a dollar a month. no idea why would I know but you know. people ask what is rocket money rocket. money is a personal finance app that. findes and cancels your unwanted sub. subscriptions monitors your spending and. helps lower your bills so that you can. grow your savings hey and Rocket money's. going to try to negotiate to lower your. bills for you by to 20% all you got to. do is submit a picture of your bill.

rocket money is going to take care of. the rest they deal with customer service. so you don't have to Rocket money has. over 5 million users including these two. goofballs has saved a total of over $500. million in cancel subscriptions saving. members up to $740 a year when using all. of the apps features stop wasting money. on things you don't use cancel your. unwed subscriptions by going to Rocket. money.com bfri that's rocket money.com. andfriends rocket money.com. badri we're wanted.

did. alive I can read it who made that wanted. by the United Arab Emirates I I know you. let me read whoa you have to read this. wow this is this this is serious huh. this is [ __ ] wanted by United Arab. Emirates bbby and Andrew Santino no call. no show no call no show being stupid. American disrespectful Behavior show. your anus to anyone with eyes show your. anus to anyone with eyes cancellation. nor FK Virginia appears in.

2023 don't turn off less successful. podcast to focus all your energy on the. ones people are actually watching sexual. harassment in the workplace no giving. caros to the FBI no giving fancy B to. ice wow wow anyway uh thank you thank. you to the Fine people of Delta Airlines. for being a bad friend and taking care. of me I really appreciate it thank you. shout out Dr Warren down in Orange. County hey Dr Warren thanks thanks for. your help Dr Warren thank you and Delta. thank you shout out Delta they killed it.

unlike that girl who got mad this past. week at Delta did you see that thing but. but did you she's like screw you Delta I. missed my best friend's wedding did you. it's like you missed the flight know how. you got it did I know how I got bug yeah. through food or through so I went to the. Urgent Care yeah and I went to my doctor. doctor I went to both cuz I was that. scared because dude on day three I lost. six PBS in one day wow and I went to. Urgent Care cuz I was concerned I. couldn't think right I was like you know.

and he was like is there blood can are. you incoherent or have you passed out. again I said no no no he goes good you. don't need to go to the emergency room. okay but he goes we'd have to take a. stool sample to find out what it really. is but he's like there's been a lot of. these things going around where people. are catching these bugs these flu like. symptomatic bugs and it rushes through. your system and then it but do you get. do you do you get it by just eating or. do you get it by talking to people like. how do you get here he doesn't know my. bad my bad but I took the flu I just. don't want it but I took the flu test. the covid test I took all the. tests nothing wow couldn't explain it.

but he was like this is not the first. time I've seen this he's like I've seen. people this is not this is I've seen. people get these stomach things in the. last couple of months I don't even know. what it is he's like could be something. that's new in Nashville that hasn't made. it back here yet he's like you I have no. idea wow yeah it's crazy but no I don't. think it's that contagious because no. one I was hanging out with you know yeah. Zack uh um uh Zack Townsen who opened. the show. fine Court M fine Court did it too yeah.

love those guys're fine they're fine. yeah so well I'll tell you something I. realized I went to I went to Tony H H. Hing Cliff show at the Forum oh yeah how. was that yeah packed was it was. incredible yeah thousands like 10 15. thousand people that's why he canceled. on us he did oh yeah oh yeah well you. know people on the internet go after him. but uh oh here we go here we go here we. go jel batov.

hey hey Joel I'm here with Andrew. Santino you're on bad. friends what's going on hey buddy hey. buddy I just want to ask you a question. is that cool sure and if you don't want. this on the internet that's fine we can. cut it out but um so Andrew played your. Club at standup live we love the club by. the way it's one of the best comedy. clubs in America that's. right. okay and Andrew Andrew I do we both I. mean I did I did I make you happy with. the shows or Oh no you're incredible.

both of you were great we all sold out. right oh absolutely yeah it's. interesting that Andrew. got um your air what is it Apple airpods. M airpods. headphones go ahead what did you. get oh yeah you got me shoes yeah badass. shoes you [ __ ] spoiled Brett hang up. the phone Joel I'm so sorry Joel I. forgot Joel I'm so sorry I forgot [ __ ]. you oh [ __ ] I'm so sorry I love you Joel.

apologize apologize we'll play next year. Andrew yeah they were Golden Goose oh my. Sho oh I know they were good shoes he's. a [ __ ] [ __ ] he said you didn't get. him anything jel have a good day bye gu. bye. dude wait okay you're first of all. you're such a [ __ ] [ __ ] this is. exactly oh my God I [ __ ] forgot this. feels so right this feels feels so right. no it feels so right yeah you're right. he bought me these $850 pair of shoes.

[ __ ] you and I've been wearing them and. then but I forgot so I'm like I wear. where I got these shoes such a piece of. [ __ ] and now I connected so anyway okay. you happy now I feel so embarrass okay. so to make it even you have to let me. piss on those shoes and throw them away. you have let. me okay did you get. fomo from the Netflix luncheon. photo it's funny you say that. I almost texted you about it because I.

edited myself in I have a photo of of. you in it yeah I'm in it show me the. Netflix lunch in photo you w invited no. we weren't no we weren't you were. invited to do the the show this is just. for people who did the no no no that's. you know that's funny because let me say. something okay all right I've been doing. my investigation yeah and I've been. doing my homework that is not correct. why not there are people there that. didn't have anything to do with any. shows yeah. well case some point no go to the left.

he didn't do anything he probably did. Eric Griffin I called Eric I go hey bud. I I saw the photo I go hey I go hey bud. I didn't know well he he brushes Matt. R's hair at. night oh that's so funny yeah yeah I go. hey but I didn't did you do any Netflix. shows he goes no man they just I just. went to the the lunch no yeah so now I. mean Paulie's there celebrating next to. Jimmy Carr there's some really good. people there Shang Wang some hu D dude. here's what here's let see yeah.

everyone's there and here's and look at. that Cher in the pool next to next to. Ted Sandos yeah no this is this is a fun. photo it's a great I'll tell you why I. have fomo yeah you because everyone in. that photo are people that either know. or I completely respect and it's like. I'm like you know one day maybe I'll. go now how did you feel when you saw it. be real if do you want me because I've. talked to Esther about it and you know I. mean she's fomo oh yeah yeah yeah I um I.

think you know me well enough to know. better I think everybody in this room. know I couldn't [ __ ] care less this. means nothing why who cares this is so. meaningless meaningless to me this is. funny a zoo in China has been accused of. dying dogs black and white to look like. pandas brilliant that's what they do in. Mexico is that brilliant that's so. brilliant well the dogs are all. gone this is the save this is the save. the dogs this is the save the dogs. campaign they got to pull them off the. streets and so they had to put them. these dogs the dogs couldn't roam around.

the streets of China so they had to put. them somewhere dog eating. joke I got it I just got it I got it. yeah yeah a zoo in China has painted. it's so funny to paint that dog actually. I would love a panda dog dude those are. so cute I would 100% buy a panda dog dye. that thing permanent. yeah what is that Hell's Angels having. homoerotic all right. anyway no this is so interesting do you. know about this there's a bunch of. photos that are going on the internet. that have been like revived from Hell's.

Angels La division right aren't these. Los Angeles Hell's Angels these West. Coast Los Angeles Hell's Angels they. would make out with other Angels like. this look at that guy yeah yeah and they. did it to to what is it display of a. comfortability in their own masculinity. and if other people got uncomfortable. they would beat the [ __ ] out of them and. kill them that's why I do it no it's not. no honestly last yeah no you guys do it. cuz you're gay no no I'm no I'm I'll do. it right now to I'll do it right now to. do it no no you no dude you just hit.

that's I got to [ __ ] listen Okay no. this is cuz you're gay no it's not. because I'm G no check it out dude these. guys do it because they want to start a. fight they're looking to fight so at. Tony show Hing Club show right I went I. bet you a lot of this [ __ ] was going on. at Tony show yeah I I I I I went and. gave Hans Kim an. award what was it to induct him in the. uh Tony Hall of Fame whatever so I. walked up with the award and I I see um. congratul. [Laughter].

they had to get you to give it to him. yeah yeah and I see um Dr Phil to my. left Adam right yeah in front of the big. crowd and he stood up and I stood up and. we just kissed on the lips you and Adam. Dr Phil sorry yeah Dr Phil and there's a. there's a sense of like it seems cool to. whom to us like we're so above it almost. like this is like we see past you know. what I mean how far does it go. that's it okay all right then last night.

I'm just saying last night I was at the. [ __ ] um Josh Adam Meers was at the. [ __ ] uh his show another gay kissy. show yeah and um I went I so I do my set. and then he came out to sing a song with. du what yeah and then during the song we. just looked at each other and we kissed. twice on the lips see I think this is. gay [ __ ] it's not g it's not gay it's. not gay it's like we're artartsy we're. above it but see people use art as a. distraction funny dude no I relate.

that's what right do you right do you. understand what I'm saying oh yeah yeah. come here right now this is some. Catholic School yeah come here right now. yeah this is repression this is. repression is what this is you guys are. it's like this it's like yeah it's for. the laughs yeah for the look he wants. more get out of here get out of here. dude God I don't want I just don't get. it have I done it with you no I've. kissed you on the lips before on the. cheek we kiss you I'll kiss you on the. cheek on the lips no yeah yeah he's yeah. you've done lips for the gag you you've.

done it to act. artsy we did it Hive at one of the. [ __ ] gigs right and you looked at me. and you you were in one of those like. Botti moods you're like I'm R brand. whatever and you were like you looked at. you locked my eyes when we did it and. then you kind of went yeah that was cool. that's what they're doing [ __ ] you the. rest of the country is right we are. weirdo lunatics yeah West Coast it's. like when David Bowie and [ __ ] Lou. Reed and MC Jagger used to kiss on the. lips right they gay that's not they're.

not gay they're [ __ ] artsy dude art. is gay CBGB art is gay right we just you. know art is gay yeah the album below we. were in Germany IG and David they were. in Germany together be [ __ ] that looks. like uh I love it dude I wish I was a. Hell's Angel back then that looks like. me and and Raj. Sharma yeah you and moam yeah me and. moam and and why is Daniel Stern. watching over yeah yeah it's [ __ ].

nuts dude Rick lman Rick lassman's there. but what's wild about this it would. start fights these guys would and they'd. fight to the death for some of these. guys for criticizing the sexuality which. is ironic because they also were. homophobic they would go beat the [ __ ]. out of any minority black gay Jewish if. they felt so yeah I mean but they're to. different things it's you're acting as. if they're they're completely two. different things no hres Thompson wrote. they can't stand it says Terry it blows. their mind every time especially the.

tongue bit the side of a photographer. invariably whips Hell's Angels into a. kissing frenzy so whenever there's a. someone taking photos they start kissing. tongue that's what it says Hest Thompson. wrote all about it and Hell's Angel is a. great book tongue have you done tongue. Tong is not artsy I've done tongue once. as all with who um uh a guy kissed me in. the back of an Uber and he took his. tongue down my throat and I kissed back. cuz I didn't want to be mean now you. know how girls feel exactly when they. put when they put up with some [ __ ]. creepo dude yeah I just had to put out.

so that it wouldn't be awkward I went on. a date with a girl from Los felis and at. the end of the Daye I turn I go to kiss. and she went the Cobra and. I you got Cobra I got Cobra dude you got. Cobra the Cobra whoa. dude yeah and I kissed her cheek whoa. you know you know when you go in for a. kiss guys we all done it we've all done. it right yeah but but yeah yeah you you. have yeah but I mean I I rarely got in.

Cobra I think I only know never got. Cobra Well I go in when I know it's. appropriate I thought sometimes my. insects wrong but I got I think this is. the right time obviously you were wrong. I was wrong where was it outside of the. restaurant no it was dropping her off at. at her house so you turn in the car so. I'm like had a great night she goes yeah. me too we should do it again I go. yeah cob cob what did you say what do. you then say after she doesn't give. you make it like a little oops have a.

good night oops oopsies oops Daisy you. get out and open her door no have you. ever opened a door for a girl it's funny. last night I was I was with a girl at. dinner and then she goes you're not. going to open the door for me which I've. never like I've never no one's ever. asked it's like a real white thing yeah. really was it a white chick yeah oh you. got to do it white people love it white. girls like stuff like that yeah that. reminds I want I'm going to write it. down so what else do whites like white. girls what do whes like yeah they like. when you hold the door for them I.

already got pumpkin skatt spray yeah any. kind any kind of Latt spray in my car. when I go on a date so pumpkin spres. they like the door open flowers any. flower but you could pick a flower off. the [ __ ] side of the road they love. it they don't care Platinum. cards no they don't care as long as. you're paying okay whatever card yeah. whatever card doesn't matter whatever. card you need money though you not got. to have money you got to have money they. love a good deal they love like. thrifting so they love like they they. like Chic thrifting so I go to oh my God. you want to get some real good white. [ __ ] go to a farmers market I went to.

one with them that's where all the girls. are yeah and we got granola oh they love. that they love granola D they buy their. own honey and [ __ ] like that they're. really into that coconut yogurt yeah yes. chicks [ __ ] like farmers market. right yeah uh what else aloe you know. what aloe is yeah don't talk to me like. that what is. it it's workout gear okay aloe work it's. like uh it's like Lululemon lemon okay. okay but the aloe is like the new [ __ ]. it's like more is it really a workout GE. Al look it up it's popular as [ __ ] I see.

it all the time alo alo they like it's. like a hip you know yeah they love. Pilates go hang out outside of a pilates. class what fisting huh fisting fisting I. think you're going to get less than 1% a. pound I mean a pound oh they love that. the word wrong but Alo so and they love. Palm Springs that's why people love Palm. Springs the location they just like to. go out there the desert I don't even. know what the [ __ ] they do they love. they just go take a a picture in front. of that sign that says drugs at that. hotel that every girl like look at the.

[ __ ] look at Palm Springs drug sign. watch this look how many [ __ ] white. girls are below this thing yeah that. [ __ ] dumb sign whatever it is. whatever hotel that is they look like. dolphins yeah I noticed they love. Dolphins they love Dolphins dude I dated. four girls in my life with Dolphin P. tattoos shut the [ __ ] up where are they. they're like either in the back or like. on the shoulder really they're just. really smart creatures right and they're. just like sentient beings so are pigs. pigs I know exactly get a pig back there.

you cuz you look like a pig anyway oh my. God that's too much that's too much. that's too much get a pig tattoo though. but i' actually respect it second. smartest animal on the planet next to. humans who says we're the smartest on. this [ __ ] planet disagree with that. cuz I saw that documentary I don't know. the. Cove I side doph I side with the. poachers I side with the poachers yeah. me too I'm a dolphin right I see a bay. it's filled with Dolphin blood yeah all. right. it's just eyeball dolphin eyeballs. floating around yeah and he's like.

there's a part Rave there's a. rave you know what I mean if I'm in the. alleyway and I see a a human hand I'm. not going to walk down the alleyway. hello it's not even a bit I'm not doing. it sounds like a comedy bit I'm doing I. would never do it's a good bit it's a. good bit and it's true are they smart. they're they're apparently they're. second to us but which means nothing cuz. look at how dumb we are exactly that's. what I'm saying cuz we love self. destruction huh we're the number one at. Destro I otters are smart complex.

problems solving and understanding. abstract situations so they understand. they. kiss but for the art for the art yeah. not they like for the art yeah yeah yeah. yeah um it's not gay it's just you know. why it's okay if it's gay you're gay. it's fine I love gay yeah I know I love. Gay I love not only are they adorable. they're also incredibly intelligent have. unique adaptations SE ERS are. intelligent see see ERS because they can. also build [ __ ] you know why they're so. smart they're ugly they're [ __ ].

hideous looking ot are the cutest Cre. what the [ __ ] are you talking about SE. are ugly they know they got to be smart. when they're that [ __ ] ugly let see. see. otter bro cute as what are you talking. about got a good photo have a Hitler. [ __ ] mustache that's a good photo. look at that look at. dude bro I want one I know exactly D. those are great they're so they're great. look at that I'll tell you what's funny. we had raccoons in the backyard for so. long and raccoons they're little. [ __ ] but they're so cute dude what.

what's going on don't even get me. started with raccoons right now don't. you get me started don't get me [ __ ]. started with r I have I have six rat. traps set up in my backyard the biggest. ones I can find to try to catch one of. these [ __ ] I'm not right now in. my driveway guess what's on it coons. baby no kungpow chicken kungpow chicken. kungpow chicken oh okay I thought you. meant like Kung like you made it all. right so I went to um um Cohen what's. his name genas Cohen genas Cohen I love. that PL right and I got three dishes.

yeah beef and broccoli sweet and sour. pork got white rice yes and I got. kungpow chicken yeah so right so I'm. eating you know what I do over I I over. order you take one bite of each and you. throw it away right so I'm like oh [ __ ]. I want to [ __ ] with this Kow chicken but. if I put in the fridge it'll be there. for nine months at least yeah yeah so I. go I'm just going to keep it in the box. and stick it in a trash you know the. trash bag put it in the trash bro. all over my oh yeah you did that and I. want clean it you knew about it they.

clean. it they ate what they needed and then. they're done and then come back tonight. tomorrow night and come clean up did. they knock over the can or they just. open the lid they somehow climb on top. of it I've seen them open it up and they. can balance like circus solay [ __ ] yeah. it's amazing right and they can get the. kuma out yeah yeah wow no it's. incredible I've seen some of their their. skills are incredible but if is it. illegal to murder one no we looked it up. you can catch him but you're not. supposed to kill him but if you do kill. him who's going to know throw it in the. LA River but they're so cute too some of.

them for sure yeah you can kill it any. time day or night in any legal manner. hey is that what it says yeah if it's. causing property damage you can kill it. is eating Kuma chicken property damage. yes okay then I'm going to I don't want. to kill I can't kill that but I don't. know I don't know if that's eating if. that's it's not like ripping up your. lawn or anything it's not doing anything. yeah I know what I'm going to do imagine. that Bobby has to go to court for. killing a raccoon you can use a lethal. body grip trap that will snap its neck. or you can shoot. it don't attempt to poison it why you.

wind up with bigger problems on your. hands a CO2 chamber that sounds like a. mafia. threat you're GNA you're going to try to. [ __ ] poison me and the other boys. you're going to end up with a bigger. problem than you ever [ __ ] wish all. right Morgan and Morgan oh my God you've. been in accidents ow ow ow what happened. I just got into an accident I hit you ow. why would you hit me yeah what are you. going to do now I'm going to call Morgan. and Morgan pal you know why because.

they're America's largest injury Law. Firm they have over 100 offices. Nationwide and more than a thousand. lawyers you're done for pal Morgan. Morgan is America's largest injury laer. is that what you're saying that's what. I'm saying to you over 100 officers. Nationwide and more than 100,000 lawyers. more than a thousand lawyers with over. 20 billion recovered from over 500,000. clients Morgan Morgan has a proven track. record of fighting to get you full and. fair compensation you know what you know. what dude what dude walking the entire. Wall of China is hard yeah submitting an. injury claim with Morgan and Morgan is. easy yeah I got one understanding what.

Terrence Howard is talking about is hard. submitting an injury claim with Morgan. Morgan is easy if you're ever injured. and I hope you're not but if you are. ever injured you can check out Morgan. Morgan their fee is free unless they win. for more information go to for thee. people.com badri or dial pound law pound. 529 from your cell phone that's for the. people F rthe people.com badri or pound. law pound 529 from your cell this is a. paid advertisement. Ming Ming Ming has been you know I.

bought a brand new couch oh my God. please tell me Ming ruined your couch. not just ruin it she and I'm going have. to take her to the hospital how much was. that. couch 105,000 $15,000 and the cat. [ __ ] ruined it not just ruin it she. pees and then there's blood in her pee. why she's dying no I think she has a UTI. or something just like her papa yeah. yeah yeah and so I put down Saran wrap. on the couch yeah what you my.

grandmother that's so funny like Saran. and wrapped the furniture I come in the. morning I see pockets of pee and. blood on my new couch I catch it with. the San why don't you just put her in a. room like I can't cuz she's a free she's. a free she's a free bird she's a free. bird dude and she's half black half. white she's free she's like Obama yeah. which does she identify she white. passing or black passing she's. definitely white she's white passing.

yeah yeah yeah right until she needs to. use that she like this as if she was. like a human right like hi I'm in but. then around other black cats does she. like yeah she gets into character what's. up I'm a cat yeah meow [ __ ]. [ __ ] yeah me ow [ __ ] me. [ __ ] that could also be its. Asian name me ow me ow so here check. this out I. bought they delivered it so I bought. this stuff called Nature's Miracle. Advanced Platinum no more marking potty. trainer for.

indoor what is it I bought two bottles. of it I don't know what it is it just. drinks it no and I'm going to spray it. all over my couch oh so ruin the couch. more yeah yeah I I don't care right at. this point because and you're going to. think this is a joke you're going to. think this a joke I swear to God I'm my. mother's life this happened yeah. okay a week ago I was with a girl on my. new couch hooking up we were making out. hell yeah all right and she rolled on.

not just the pee but she had poo two. poos in there cute right and so when she. got up I could see the Poo stuck to her. [ __ ] t-shirt right and I I I I you. know I saw hey was you know what I mean. let's go to the bedroom and I knocked. him off with my hand and we went to the. [ __ ] because I know how do you say. there's poo on you it ruins the vibe. yeah it ruins the vibe I think I think I. don't know right and I knocked it off. and I still haven't hung out with her. since she doesn't know though she. doesn't know she does know I think when.

I dropped her off she probably looked at. her shirt and goes why is there you know. mean imagine she was embarassed she's. like I went over to the guy's house with. poop on my shirt she didn't know it came. from your house oh [ __ ] she could have. thought she brought poop I could have. just blamed her like hey [ __ ] [ __ ]. don't come over my wash your [ __ ]. shirt why you have cat pee and poo on. your back [ __ ] [ __ ] shirt dude you so. I I don't think as quick as you spin it. dude dud I have to spin those situations. you have to be like get your [ __ ] shirt. off my couch yeah it's like like I used. to when I was a kid me and my friend. Brian Bradley we used to steal weed from.

this guy's house right yeah and after we. would steal it cuz we knew we went to. this dude went to work and we when he. would come back from work we would go to. his house and buy weed from. him you'd steal it then buy it yeah we'd. still and buy he goes and he would go. look and he'd freak out like oh my. weed's gone you're like well we'll pay. you for some yeah and we go let's let us. help you cuz if you're that guy yeah. right then you don't think that they're. that people no why would they steal from. me they just bought for me yeah it's. actually brilliant that's I should do. that with the cat PE poo thing you 100%.

spin it on him a little spin it you got. to spin it dude one time I pretended to. roll up a joint from this girl's weed at. her birthday party when we were in. England we went to like a random house. party yeah and my buddy Travis was like. rolling up the weed and the British guy. was like here you go here's our tin roll. up you know you guys know how to roll up. and he gave him like the whole tin of. weed yeah and Travis looked at me I was. like so get the [ __ ] out of here we. stoked our tin of weed and we walked out. wow so mean wow yeah yeah and they were. looking for you it was a party he. thought he was like cuz he was like he.

was like the cool American guys roll up. a blunt what would you do we went to. your party Carlos and we stole a tin of. weed from here if you guys literally did. no just we no my name is uh Marcos maros. maros we're from Spain and I'm Wilfred. I'm from. Sweden I feel like I'd be legitimately. really upset oh what you going to do. about I'm Marco I'm from Sweden TOS yeah. I need my I need my the same country why. do we have to be from a different. country well you don't know how to do.

accents I know but I want to be okay. you're from Sweden yeah yeah I'm Mar I'm. a maros for Sweden I'm a maros for. Sweden and I need my weed back I'm. addicted no we're not done we no this is. what we walk. in just let us do that Marco I Marco no. you are Marco what I'm a willfred you're. a Marcos I'm a mar for of Sweden hey man. you got any bad for us to smoke you have. the Cockroach for us. no yeah. here's oh is that ctin if your marijuana.

lot of marijuana no can we take it. outside with us can we take a really no. do do it right here oh hold on. look. oh good good you get him to look the. other way yeah you have to do that right. look over there so if you're if you're. at home and if you're going to steal. weed from somebody just do the whole. look over. there and that never worked I don't. think look over there yeah look yeah and. then we would have to run I bet you look. over there does work what is that oh.

look what is that and then you just walk. away with the weed casually say what it. is what is that uh. ghost too F too slow yeah what is that. what is that is that a crack in the. foundation of the home getting to really. start looking yeah yeah your lamp fixure. is on fire well no it have to be on fire. then for it to be real oh [ __ ] right it. looks crooked something do a small. meticulous give me another yeah small. detail yeah dude is that black mold on.

your tile on your Sky tile yeah yeah. yeah yeah there's a hole in that grout. in the corner there's a I want to create. my own though please yeah is that grass. growing inside your living room it's not. they take two seconds to look and then. they're like no oh how about. this I like your rug where'd you get. that West Elm that now but they're still. looking at you oh [ __ ] I I'm not good at. it no I'm not good at stuff like that. try to look over there look over there. there we go gone gone okay anyway don't.

steal weed don't steal weed you know. what steal it steal it yeah yeah who. cares now you can just go to the store. and buy it there's way too many stores. that sell weed by the way there was a. weed store next to the Home Depot and I. was like okay you know what's crazy the. accessib is it for I I know it's like. really but the accessibility of. mushrooms now oh yeah they're everywhere. it's just laying last night the ComEd. are just laying around big bags well you. know what how is so I get mushrooms. every time I go to The Comedy Store and. our friend Carol that hooks us up that.

we love from New Tropics and I I have a. basket of party I have a party drug. basket at my house so when people come. over I always have weed for people. mushrooms I've never seen this you're. not invited I don't show it to you okay. okay for very obvious reasons yeah I was. just trying to think of what when you. were so when you were not sober I. definitely didn't want to show it to you. that bumps me out well because you would. consume at a rate that was probably. dangerous I know I just thought that. maybe we could add had a fun night yeah. but like together you just go too far.

yeah but like if you went too far with. me that could be fun. once yeah I mean I've been [ __ ] up. with you Carlos I know we should just do. it we part no we're not going to part. you're sober I know I know I know no. more I know I party with you no more we. can't reminisce on no enticing why can't. I cuz that's against the [ __ ] rules. party together dude no more party stuff. I have a basket of drugs at my house and. when the movers came to move us the guy. was like Hey I'm so sorry I can't. legally. move drugs no my wife is like what are. you talking about he's like there's a.

basket in a laundry room that's filled. with drugs no yeah we have it for when. people come over for parties wow because. when I have people come over I'm always. like here here's drugs if you want them. you know wow it's a courtesy it's a nice. thing when am I when am I it's kind of. rude I know you've been sick but you. invited me over to your no one's come. over to my house I just moved in I. literally just moved. in am I going to have a house party yeah. you guys got the invite didn't you mhm. yeah I didn't get anything you didn't.

get anything no the joke was that I know. and I was doing a SE I know it wasn't. working yeah when you do offshoot jokes. doing an off I was doing off isn't that. interesting how far he's fallen he's. fallen so bad that's you fallen far your. instincts are wrong it was an offshoot. okay then I don't even no no whoa dude I. don't even I don't even understood the. joke I think you just said that I. understood no I when I. was get your mind together dude you.

can't fool a fooler you can't fool a. fooler you can't fool a fooler right. damn it yeah you by the way this is. Stolen Valor you're trying to act fooler. you're not a fooler Bud Stolen Valor. you're not a fooler yeah don't fool a. fooler that's a real [ __ ] fool right. here jonov AR's Valor this is a grade A. [ __ ] fool head you're not fool in a. fool head pal my bad I'm I'm foolish. beyond my ears Beyond yeah yeah yeah. it's like Infinity foolishness oh my God.

speaking of which before we go any. further yeah did we watch Terrence. Howard on Joe. Rogan no everyone in this [ __ ] room. has an assignment you need to go home. and watch this entire interview it would. it's going to blow your [ __ ] mind is. Terence good better than good buddy. better than good he's going he goes off. he goes ham Sam he's like the he is like. a neuroscientific Cat Cat Williams wow. he's gone he's gone it's [ __ ] awesome.

yeah yeah he's loopy poopy look up one. [ __ ] clip of this guy I can't wait. remember they have a thing called. zero they they they go from one to zero. to negative one there is no zero to even. hold on the guy that got fired from Iron. Man the amount of times I've sat in a. garage in high school yeah getting. stoned out of my [ __ ] mind and heard. this in the. background and then had to go I got to.

get back to my mom's house yeah yeah. like the amount of times high in a. garage in high school get an Xbox that's. what I do this but this is seriously. this conversation is happening right now. in someone's garage yeah right now one. guy's going the magnetism was never. stood still and then that's me too high. going I got to go back to my mom's house. I got to go get a gatorade at the gas. station and go back to my mom or or was. one guy going yeah dude yeah not paying. attention at all doesn't know what the. [ __ ] he just said go I get it by the way. this is how wonky this [ __ ] is go.

halfway go halfway down go halfway just. in the middle and now listen to where. he's at now go ahead there I don't need. anything else because they just they. didn't want me to go and talk about this. and that's why I went out there and said. hey pull out your. calculator wow what the [ __ ] are we. talking about w wow wow W pull out your. calculator you listen to the whole thing. it's it's it's it's you know it's like. it's like it's what I imagine reading. the Bible would be like wow it's eating. the thickest pie of chocolate cake it's.

annoying as [ __ ] I could I couldn't stop. listening to it yeah I was like what in. the [ __ ] the first recorded zero. appeared in Mesopotamia around 3 BC the. Mayans invented it independently Circ at. 4 ad he would have a Twist on this okay. okay okay I want to be real for a second. let's can we just I'm a lay person ditto. excuse me I just said ditto you [ __ ]. [ __ ] okay that's an agreeance I'm. saying me too okay let's have it. anyway touche my friend by the way how.

far away is this show from that. show full opposite no I'm a peasant okay. yeah same I'm a lay person and I don't I. don't know what the [ __ ] that means so. what does that mean what does what mean. how is zero invented in Mesopotamia I. think zero was something that was just. like always a part of no he's saying. zero is public they're saying it was. publicly recognized as a thing that. Mayan's. used but is as calculation. they had to the idea of zero is. something that's just a truth no now.

you're Terrence. Howard now you're Terence what I'm. saying is that there's a caveman right. one caveman had three sticks yeah I. don't know what they collected rocks. rocks and one caveman didn't have any. that's zero well they killed that guy. you had nothing oh you killed the guy. with the zero zero is dead right if you. had nothing you die all right am I okay. I guess you're not wrong no explain it. to me man what do was the talking about. when they they started to recognize zero. as a numerical identification of nothing.

so there was a point in time that that. no one really knew that there's a point. in time when I'm sure it wasn't. communicated clearly okay it's like. gravity it existed before people knew. what it was I know but that's that's my. point existed though look at that they. use a blank at first they use a blank. space to indicate nothing as a value and. when that grew confusing they began. using a pair of angled wedges as a. placeholder for Blank Space oh so the. little circle of it yeah the symbol of. it yeah the symbol you mean the zero. yeah yeah yeah zero and know physically.

zero I'm so sorry maybe I'm like Dr am I. drowning no no honestly am I drowning am. I tarded you're trying to figure out. zero nobody it's okay yeah no they it's. uh yeah okay it's it's relatively new. it's only it's only 3,000 years. old. also God bless the guy for having a new. yeah God Bless America God bless Terence. Howard um I it just he said he's going.

to reinvent the periodic table wow he. said it's he said it's vertical and it's. through sound colors are sound wow. pretty cool I hope it all comes true I. Googled when marriage became an. institution it's 4,300 years ago yeah. it's been around for a long time yeah. but what did they do before I know what. they did what do you mean before. marriage what did they do there was like. two there there were groups right tribes. and like two or three alpha male dudes. just pretty much [ __ ] everybody right.

and then guys like me and Carlos and uh. Andreas not yon I think you're one of. the members we were just we were cucks. or something we jerked off in the. watching you defin yeah for sure you're. yeah historically you and another. Universe was cucking you guys were. cucking fancy People Like Us invited. invented a word you know what that word. is oh my. God hey I can't put it I'm just saying. that's what happened I think yeah you. need to watch it I want to watch it ca I.

think it'll help me go to sleep yeah. you're not going to retain any. information yeah I don't think so what. is this evil laugh competition oh [ __ ] I. would love to try you would crush all. right let me hear. [Music]. [Applause]. [Laughter]. now these guys are all practicing what. they're going to do after they shoot up.

the. school yeah. yeah that one's pretty good Amic just. pause it what did he say this is an. American thing no there's nerds all over. the [ __ ] world look at you you. [ __ ] nerd this is this is just a. different kind of nerd you're a you're a. visual [ __ ] nerd these are sound. dorks you like [ __ ] cameras and all. filming invite you to the party [ __ ]. yeah you wouldn't get invited you're not. even invited to that party dude yeah cuz.

you'd have to you'd have to bring let's. do it let's try a symbol you do one. first no you go first you wanted to try. let me can I just I've never done it. before let's hear one more I want to. hear the last yeah I I want to see the. landscape of. it and they all want to [ __ ] that chick. all these. [Laughter]. [Music]. nerds is this this is happening at a. school what are they teaching these. [ __ ].

[Applause]. kids all right po all right let's hear. your evil laugh I'm trying it oh go. ahead just. practicing. [Laughter]. no no that's really good that was. actually really [ __ ] good you would. have won that whole thing you go no no I.

want to I want to Envision I'm tied to. we're knocked out I'm tied to a tree I'm. in a forest right and you know what what. do they say whenever someone's like. kidnapped their first words out of their. mouth is always this hello. hello hello. hello you know who I am no I'm one of. the Hell's Angels. please don't kiss me oh I'm gonna kiss. you baby please don't kiss me I'm gonna.

kiss you so hard okay I'm like. G that's good yeah that's. who wow that's good that's good right. yeah that's like different that's my. little Hell's Angel yeah that's really. good Kissy Kissy yeah all right I got to. get on my bike that's really good how. funny Would you to H see hell's anger. [ __ ] what [ __ ] and then kiss a guy. and then and then roll away well if they.

have the evil laugh there's other things. they could probably do like climax. competition yeah evil climax uh how. about not evil sad climax well that's. [ __ ] I can do that one every time. okay do. it oh that's. good I had a two yeah the first I think. it's happening little half shot once it. happened nothing happen. yeah yeah you know you know what fancy. sounds like when he nuts oh would tell.

me. hi yeah yeah yeah what does my con sound. like ah I was glass in the tong Oh No. Cap oh oh I gassed inside your. puss uh Gass inside your puss no cap on. God when he comes on God gen Z coming oh. [ __ ] on God. your generation [ __ ] sucks sucks.

you're a bunch of [ __ ] losers yeah um. thank you for being a bad friend. [Music]. a.