Andrew's 8 Ball Birthday | Ep 87 | Bad Friends

hey come see me live I'm on tour right. now andrewsantino.com for tickets. andrewsantino.com for tickets I'm all. over the place I'm going to San. Francisco then I'm going to Columbus I'm. going to Pittsburgh I'm going to Grand. Rapids I'm going to Philly we added. another show in Philly we added a late. show in Philly as well as in Seattle and. Portland in the New Year coming to. Chicago as well and the New York Comedy. Festival in November and then I'll be up. in Albany later in the year I'm all over. the place so go to andrewsantino.com for. tickets andrewsantino.com for those. tickets you two are bad friends who are.

these two idiots. [Music]. we're bad friends. happy birthday. to me. happy birthday. to me. happy birthday. you don't know my birthday.

happy birthday. to me. Andrew thank you Pete and Andres and. George and that's it hold on thank you. Pete thank you George thank you Andres. and thank you Rudy Jules my heart of. hearts my little brown Queen my little. brown Bean Queen wait wait wait is that. your birthday yes it is and you had to. Google it to know it I know but I my.

because I was wondering the pro the. thing that I got you always getting. delivered to my house oh it's coming to. your house yeah and I and I'm like oh it. delivered didn't come yet and I'm like. let me open my cards from Pete okay let. me open my cards from Pete all right you. make my eyes happy you make my lips. happy you make my heart Happy. I could keep heading south but I think. you get the idea. then. it says uh happy birthday I didn't.

realize how sexual this card was until. after I bought it Pete so yeah very Pete. I love that Barry Pete let's see and. this is from Pete let's see what Pete. got me in here. let's see what Pete got me it is some. socks oh Pete thank you so much this is. men's crew my favorite uh they've got. wicking cool Comfort Comfort fabric. Haynes can't beat it thank you so much. Pete you're welcome that's the president. that's coming in the mail let's see.

what's next man this is great Bobby I. can't wait to open yours I'm sure it's. in the Prius right you want to go get it. it's I it's not it's three days for this. one's from Rudy it says friend. in this world where things move so fast. and change before our eyes I take. comfort in the precious few things that. are constant and. and true the Friendship we share day. after day year after year Rudy. Rudy thank you Rudy Jules this was very. sweet wait wait. how the [ __ ] hey hey hey stop Rudy what.

did you get me let's see what she got me. whoa red bush how did she she's not even. 21. good old-fashioned red bush you. don't have to be 21 in the Philippines. to drink it's only 18. oh you got it. from the Philippines sure did. thank you Rudy jewelry did you. I got it did you know that it was his. birthday you never told me oh and a taco. and a taco oh. wow do you want this Taco yeah yeah.

thank you Rudy. Rudy and also Rudy left uh a receipt in. here. oh good in case I wanted to give it back. thank you Rudy and my favorite by far. fancy bee my little sweet prince. a good friend is like sunshine for the. soul. happy birthday so grateful for you and. all the positive vibes you bring to my. world Andrew yeah working with you is a.

real treat you are funny hard-working. respectful talented and the real engine. behind this great show Bobby doesn't do. much and I know and I know it's hard for. you sometimes but let's be honest here. Bobby is a fading fading star yeah. Andrew you're a shooting star on your. way to the Moon turning 38 is such a. special year and I want to be here to. celebrate with you I love you so much. thank you for being a bad friend fancy B.

P.S I don't like Bob. well thank you fancy B you're a sucker. let me open up myself. for a second no because I knew it was. your birthday and I bought you a present. here. let me see I bought you one open it. is it money. I knew it was money see you don't get to. trick me anymore with money oh they went. right in the cup that was a good shot. that was a really good shot fancy what. did you buy me oh fancy oh the iPad Pro.

yeah are you really being serious yes. NCB there's nothing in there fancy I bet. you money there's nothing in there oh. yeah he didn't get you an iPod Pro. yes he did what fancy wait wait what did. you get me you [ __ ] Fancy Fancy Fancy. Fancy what did you get me you [ __ ] this. is outrageous dude fancy this is. incredible he got me the iPad Pro and.

that keyboard that I asked for. fancy I love you. love you back God you're the best fans. where's my Red Bull. where's my Red Bull hey it's my birthday. I. don't show too not today you're not I. know can I get my beverage please George. say please please there it is. fancy what a gift that's incredible. should I open more yeah why not it's my. birthday oh oh. I've always wanted one of these. a heavy metal truck oh my God this is so.

cool thank you thank you guys. conversation with George real quick this. is amazing I'm gonna have a conversation. with Jordan oh my God. I want to take this out of the box and. plug it into I wish it would ghost. already. great. you knew about this to play a prank on. me so I can look like a [ __ ] pillow. on my own and I didn't get this before. nothing man you should have [ __ ].

reminded me I was giving up her lap I. wasn't supposed to be here today. George yeah. [Applause]. George has nothing to do with this. there we go here okay is it okay that I. open up. hey you have a [ __ ] another thing. coming can I open up my other gifts can. I open up my other gifts. oh yes. look at this Alpha strike this this Nerf.

gun set that is so [ __ ] cool. dude this is probably the best birthday. I've had in years in years. I'm [ __ ] stoked. need I forget I had got socks from Pete. oh my God. Star Wars Lego set. you know what I'll give that to Rudy. because she likes toy stuff there you go. build something during the show. look at that I've got my iPad Pro my. brand new keyboard and I got my truck. and I got my Nerf shooter and I got my.

Bushmills red bush. thank you guys so much let's get back to. the show and my twenty dollars I don't. want this twenty dollars it's sturdy. something about it's not genuine why. because I feel as if you just took some. paper mache off the ground and you put. 20 out of your pocket and hand it to me. because we can run the tape and saw you. do it no no it's your birthday and I. bought you a present here no yeah I saw. you can I say something I saw you do it. may I sit talk you picked a paper mache. off the ground and took it out of your. pocket I'm not listen.

I'm not doing well. what. um physically no more from this from. Rudy Rudy gave me a magic eight ball and. a slinker. I'm not doing well. my accountant called me is Bobby a piece. of [ __ ] for not remembering my birthday. weeks ago. and he said you lost everything is Bobby. a piece of [ __ ] for not remembering my. birthday and that's my last twenty. dollars. signs point to yes yeah yeah that's my. last twenty dollars signs point to yes.

and so when it's a man's when it's the. man's last twenty dollars and they give. it to you he's giving you everything. signs are pointing to yes okay. you didn't listen to what I just said. I mean you want to ask the Magic 8 Ball. something like uh. is Bobby you know you want you why don't. you ask me something I'm gonna take it. out once you ask me something you've. always wanted to ask you because it's my. birthday Bobby doesn't get to build. anybody around baby right now Bobby. you're acting like a [ __ ] baby right. does this feel familiar you're acting. like this.

it's outrageous but you know I'm gonna. let you act like a child because you are. a child what did you do at your birthday. what'd you do at your birthday what did. you not act like a little baby how did I. act like a baby you left you left before. the party was a show to do man we threw. you a [ __ ] surprise party. go ahead and ask a question of the magic. eight ball all right it's Tito Bobby and. annoying stupid [ __ ].

read what that says I'm not gonna move. it so everyone knows that it is okay. don't do it don't don't just move it. just see it and say it into the mic go. ahead here don't move it. it is certain fact. [Laughter]. steroids that you're on has [ __ ] you. up I'm Juiced you're Juiced out and. aggressive and I don't like it I don't. like it it's my birthday it's not it's. in three [ __ ] days relax this is my. birthday this is not your birthday it's.

three days before your [ __ ] birthday. it's my birthday either way you didn't. get me a gift I'm gonna get you a gift. it's okay it's okay okay and the next. time we do bad friends you'll see for. the presents I get and you will be. mesmerized wait by the way that stupid. [ __ ] painting that you got for me. uh-huh that stupid painting I got for. you right yeah is gonna be nothing. compared to what I'm gonna get you my. friend are you being serious yeah I hope. so I am because I tell you nobody's dead. serious okay because I tell you what. what that painting that painting that. you got yeah very valuable to my heart.

very important to me that's a lot that. painting that you got and you want to up. me a little bit you know Segura and. Chrysler you know he bought him a jet. ski. I'm just saying if you're looking at it. for sure Bert Kreischer by Tom seguro. jet ski first jet ski yeah they have a. different kind of relationship the. Outdoorsman they're outdoorsy people. we're not outdoorsy people so buy me. some indoorsy stuff I'm gonna get you. like coffee that's in Dorsey no yeah. yeah you got to be something better than. fancy big I mean iPad Pro with the folio. keyboard that I can't [ __ ] believe. and not only I cannot believe that.

um what did you get me for my birthday's. fancy. Rudy was in charge of the iPad she yeah. she was I was uh partnering with her. right. so did you see that they just threw you. under the [ __ ] bus they're not your. friends let me say this too okay I'm. your friend and you're the best Rudy I. gave you a present last night. did I not give you a present last night. what are you referring to on stage when. I brought you up what did I give you an. intro right before that.

what did you give me before that what'd. I do with the mic you farted on it you. piece of [ __ ] you happy [ __ ] happy. birthday you're so repulsive. Happy Birthday Bobby brought me on stage. last night yeah and he he goes uh after. he's done doing his set or whatever you. call it okay stop and then he goes stop. and then he goes and then he goes yeah. yeah should I do it again and should I. fart into the mic yeah and he wraps it. knowing I'm next and then he puts it up. in his [ __ ] yeah not not not near it.

in between his ass cheeks it's shoved in. better for the Acoustics it is it's. louder yeah and it did thump it was it. was amazing so that was Bobby's birthday. gift you heard it here folks okay can I. just say this though can I just Define. myself what you don't understand my. friend okay is that before I knew it was. her birthday yeah right and I opened up. my dad's uh ashes ashes I don't want. your dad's address but you don't know. what I did dude I stuck my finger in the. ashes right yeah and I put it around my. butthole.

[Laughter]. [Music]. I did 24 hour fast right really before I. did the fast right yeah I lit candles. right I had all my ancestors right come. together wow the spirits came right. yeah and I had kimchi chicken and I had. all these Korean dishes I ate them and I. didn't poo right and then I the incense.

and the and the candles and and my. ancestors coming they went with came in. within me then I put the [ __ ] ashes. around my butthole okay right got it and. I held a fart for 24 hours just for my. birthday yes so when I fart did you have. a good set last night I had a good. really good set last night happy. birthday. can I tell you something happy birthday. what I switched mics and you saw that so. yeah and then guess what happened it. wasn't that mic I use I didn't use your. fart mic it doesn't matter I gave you. your fart Mark to go it was once I.

farted he was in the room. you don't know how Korean things work oh. rituals and also can I say this too. right 70 validity is this any of this. real do you think yeah. it's real and then here's another thing. when you threw the other mic at me right. yeah the fart mic I threw the fart mic I. just did I catch it in the air. well I threw it right into your hands. what do you mean did you catch it in the. air it wasn't it's dark right you're. about 30 feet away you threw away six. feet 30. we have the video do you really.

yeah okay 100 we can show it okay show. the video right so I count it in do you. know why I caught it it was the fart mic. you caught it because it was in the dark. in the or look at it Pete can I send. this to you yes yeah yeah okay first of. all so happy birthday man thank you dude. yeah I do want another materialistic. [ __ ] is as good as what I gave you last. night you had a wonderful set let me. tell you something what this means a lot. to me I know and I and I did this is way.

better than anything I didn't know that. about you and so it's like I'm gonna I'm. now I know that you're into. materialistic things I'm gonna get you. that yeah you're into materialistic. things too I'm into spiritual things as. well so am I that's why I did that last. night at Seance yes I'm spiritual first. material second your material for a. spiritual second I'm everything first. oh that makes sense yeah yeah I have. everything first and there is no second. for me right everything's 100 with me. you had a good set last night too you. had a fun little time up there yeah then. why'd you say that it was whatever he.

did up there well because it's just. that's part of the show. I see I thought I had a very good set. you did I thought the lineup last night. was old school comedy it was back in the. [ __ ] day back in the day you me. Donnell Rollins. acinio it went Arsenio Hall yeah then. Ali Wong yup Chris Spencer yup me you. Darnell Donnell Fahim. yeah that's it that's all I remember. yeah because you left you left too.

that's right yeah so I don't know I'm. not hanging out late but it was a great. night that was one of those nights that. made me feel like the crowd was getting. what they paid for so to speak yeah like. that was a banger [ __ ] the room was. on fire it also reminded me of the first. show that I've done since the pandemic. where I went this is the closest to what. it once was where at this club. in just in in anything. you're saying oh that show felt like it. felt like pre-pandemic a pre-pandemic. show pre-pandy show yeah yeah well I'm.

excited happy birthday I'm older you. know thank you 38. wow I know. I've always been looking 40. 45 maybe. 50. yeah uh let's ask one more question. Jules let's throw a question back to the. magic eight ball Jules what do you say. go ahead I'm shaking shaking shaking. is. Andres gay. is Andres gay. you can read it I'm not gonna I just.

wanna I just want to make sure that it's. not no it's people see we're not. cheating you can't really show the. camera it says in bold letters all. capitalized without it without a doubt. that's without a doubt yeah Rudy Jules. just another one let's get a little. magic eight ball. does Pete have. a you can say it's small what Venus does. Pete have a small penis I thought she. was gonna say AIDS yeah.

by the way we can ask the age one second. if you want yeah does Pete have a small. penis ladies and gentlemen. why'd you switch it no it says ask again. later. why do they do that does Pete have a. small penis and it's. come on come on oh near the proof go. ahead what does it say. yes yes Real Simple Things rigged no way. it's totally rigged okay Pete then you. ask it a question and we'll find out if. it's rigged is there any negative. answers on there is it all positive no.

there's but I haven't heard one okay. well ask something that you think would. provide give a negative answer am I a. better comedian than you oh boy. what does that say very doubtful yeah. this thing is [ __ ] awesome it's. awesome this is the best birthday I've. had great why because I'm here with my. friends and my family I'm here with the.

bad friends family ah the people that. mean the world to me yeah okay that's. why yeah I was angry that little doc doc. couldn't even do it today at the fans. like Dr you like Doc because he sits in. what do you think what do you think a. little dog. funny yeah he is very very funny. than him that must feel good yeah that. must feel really good because he's 80. yeah that must be you're thinking should. we set up a fight for between her and. Doc and see who wins. I don't know you think you'd win in a.

fist fight no Boxing Club boxing it's. boxing not street fight no his face is. bigger than mine yeah but you can kick. you can kick. no no I still try yeah yeah I think um. no because he's gonna do belly shots. oh yeah I mean yeah and she's got a. small little belly and she'll collapse. she'll collapse she'll break in half how. much how much do you weigh. 115. yeah what is what do you think he. weighs. electricity 150.

um maybe more maybe it was 160. because. the density of like a bowling ball is. different than you think yeah yeah it's. harder than to know yeah maybe 155 160. yeah you're out of this you're out of. the way but he is thinner than I am. or no ah what is no I think thank you no. that feels good well you dropped some. weight you lost a couple of pounds yeah. because I've been exercising every night. are you doing it every night yeah she. sees it yeah what are you doing now. Peloton are you loving the Peloton. I love it you know what I do is I do the.

Free Ride what does that mean I don't. need no [ __ ]. I want to say it some say it bald oh. athletic. screaming at me you're right just you. know what I mean pull through one more. minute oh all you got so free red means. turn it on you can just go you should. push start right there's a timer what. are you looking at on the screen when. you free nothingness not even like a. outside no huh there's Scenic I don't. even do Scenic I don't like Scenic so. it's black it's black right do you have.

headphones on no I'm watching my shows. on my iPad better health better help is. my favorite um thing in the whole world. because I use it in my life you know I. see that I struggle you know with my. addictions I struggle with you know my. relationship sometimes and this and that. and better help has helped me I'm I. think the one of the reasons why I'm. still sober and I'm still doing good in. my life is because of this this is. because of Better Health yes getting. therapy is important and I think if. there's something interfering with your.

happiness to preventing you from. achieving your goals better help Works. Bob and I both talked about mental. health yeah on the show we believe in. this it's not a crisis line it's not. self-help it's professional counseling. done securely online you can start. communicating in under 48 hours that's. how quick you can get and it's available. for clients all over the world yeah you. can log in any anytime to your account. anywhere and send a message to your. counselor better Hub is committed to. facility great therapeutic matches so. they'll make it easy and free to change. counselors if needed it's more. affordable than traditional offline.

counseling and financial aid is. available visit betterhelp.com bad. friends that's better help and join the. over 1 million people who have taken. charge of their mental health with the. help of an experienced professional in. fact Andrew yeah so many people happy. birthday by the way either way thank you. have been using better help that they. are now recruiting additional counselors. and over it 50 states wow in all 50s in. all of the states yeah this podcast is. sponsored by better helping bad friends. listeners get 10 off their first month. at betterhelp.com bad friends that is 10. off your first month at betterhelp.com.

you know Andrew I've had a financial. difficulty the same with my taxes and. and my credit cards and others and that. and I've been in debt before right and. upstart is the thing for you if you're. in that truck if you're in trouble 16. Grand in debt was probably one of the. the biggest uh holes I've ever been in. yeah stuff like upstart wasn't around at. that time and upstart a fast and easy. way to pay off your debt with a personal. loan all done online whether it's paying. off credit cards consolidating High. interest debt or funding personal. expenses over a million people have used. upstart to get one fixed monthly payment.

with a clear payoff date if you're. carrying a credit card balance month. after month it can feel like you're in a. never-ending cycle of debt with no end. in sight upstart can help you make that. final payment so you can get ahead hey. man you're not alone uh the way to debt. can be crippling but upstar can help you. get on your path to Financial Freedom. find out how upstart can lower your. monthly payments today when you go to. upstart.com bad friends that's. upstart.com bad friends and don't forget. to use your url to let them know we sent.

you we sent you a loan amount to be. determined based on your credit income. and certain other information provided. in your loan application upstart.com. friends upstart.com bad friends. see can you not put the shows on the. screen. on the Peloton screen I don't know how. to do that you know but not you know. what I've been watching so you sit an. iPad on top I watched every single. I told you this last night huh I've. watched every single intervention the TV. show I love that show ever made from. season one to 14 or whatever it is.

I love it I love it and I love it when. like it doesn't work out yeah no because. no no I love how it doesn't work out. because at the end of it right it's so. good it's either this this either. happens it says you know I mean three. months later that's always a good sign. and then it cuts too yeah yeah is that. guitar riff yeah and then um but then. sometimes it just goes straight to like. a counselor yeah he escaped 12 hours. since he got here we don't know where he. is he might be dead he's in the woods. yeah we think he might be dead in the. woods and then they show the family go.

through their like codependency you know. when it's uplifting you know I think. it's good it is a great show you know. that song at the end makes me sad every. time. [Music]. you know that sounds like yeah I have. that song on my uh um who sings it I. forgot what the band is but I have it. you know who it sounds like boom who. does it sound like who's the first. person you thought of. man. who was like the saddest artist from up. there other than Kurt Cobain to kill. himself.

Elliott Smith totally I thought it was. Elliot Smith the moment very Elliot. Smithy but I but it's not him but it's. not him it's not him but it sounds a. little bit like his. Angel yeah it's uh sad and do you watch. intervention do you know about the show. do you know what it is but you know why. I'm watching it do you know why I'm. watching it why are you watching I'm on. the border of relapsing you're not gonna. relapse I think I am why do you think. you're gonna relapse. I just I'm obsessed with it with the. idea of relapsing yeah yeah it's really.

scary to not I know that's why I haven't. and we've been I've been calling you. today I haven't done it because you. because of you good and kalila okay good. and the people of my life has she helped. no. she's the worst. when I look at her I think of weed he's. gonna relapse because of you you make me. want to relapse your behavior around the. house is outrageous what you said to do. what you're gonna do yesterday you. didn't do what you said you were gonna. do yesterday and that's [ __ ]. outrageous okay what did you say you. said you were to clean my house you. claimed my car you said you wanna clean.

my car and take my car to the [ __ ] um. oil changing place and the the lights. the in check engine light is still on. the car yeah and there's no gas and you. [ __ ] make me want to relapse so if. you don't want me to relapse you do the. [ __ ] thing you said you're gonna do. I'll do it tomorrow but that's what you. see every [ __ ] day I'll do it. tomorrow I promise can I tell you. something yeah you keep saying that. tomorrow tomorrow tomorrow that's it and. it's one more day for an addict to get. what he needs yeah one more day it's the. same thinking of like I'll quit tomorrow. I'll quit tomorrow one more I'll quit. tomorrow one more hit one more for that.

that's what makes me remind me of. relapsing and you're that you're the. reason why oh no you're not the reason. why I'm just you know I'll tell you what. it is yeah what is it. ah. I Wanna Get High. no no hey I want to get high baby no. baby. I want to see you know they're just. because of the pandemic I think and it's. like yeah like we got out of it I know. this is probably negative probably no. comedy fodder it's not nice you'd be.

real go ahead yeah but I'm not gonna do. it right. okay you promise no you can't promise. I can't promise anything I can't promise. if I'm going to be alive in a week well. that you don't have control of you have. control over using again do I. do I have no I don't think so you do. well well that's the opposite of an. addict right an addict has no control. um but you're addict in recovery and.

that Accident Recovery does have right. but in my own recovery you what you. should be I should be but you're not I. may not do you want to have a meeting. right now yes okay here we go okay do. you know what that you know have you. been to a meeting before. by the way but everyone has a share let. it be known let it be known that's fine. but we're not denigrating the idea of uh. addiction and meetings right I'm a big. supporter of this I am okay addiction's. a part of my life yeah okay my family. so we're not but we're not making fun of. this but in this meeting mock meeting.

we're doing you guys are going to play. different people that's right and your. stories have to be horrendous that's the. only way I okay well why don't you share. first right should I make up a story I. think you should be you. because you're on the brink of of using. again we're just two people have been. coming here for months you're new to. this meeting right I'm new to this. meeting right so your name is what Billy. Winston oh. what's Winston sorry Winston yeah. Raphael Georgina Georgina we have our.

[ __ ] name tags right here oh sorry. sorry I'm just so drugged out you know. what I mean oh man yeah yeah he's been. using I've been using Georgina this. guy's been using I've been blacking out. so I don't remember man so well why. don't you just in Georgina yeah I'm Bob. alcoholic. yeah good so um you know I've been. coming to this no I've been sober for a. couple years now and I just have these. um. I don't know what I have these strong. desires they're not desires we all have. coffee. okay.

I don't know why Winston would say that. I know a coffee addicts love coffee and. Winston I know what coffee is we have. coffee I get it in every corner is a. weed store yeah do you know that I do. there's that flower play there's one. across the street from here yeah there's. one yeah there's one right across from. and they have these glowing neon lights. that blink weed weed read and then my. pocket goes I got money money money. right so when I drive by I don't go in.

obviously I don't go in no right and I. look and I start trembling a little bit. and like oh no and then I go through. now right but it's like that never used. to be the case used to be I don't even. think about it right it's not even an. option so you might relapse on weed. I'm not gonna we don't we don't want we. don't do we don't we don't want you to. one two three we don't want they don't. do that in the thing we do in our. meetings okay this is different sorry. Winston yeah Georgina thank you tell me. your story.

I've been sober hi Georgina say your. name sorry you've been here for years. yeah I'm Georgina hi Georgine no wait. sorry don't yell at Winston did you use. your sponsor. [Laughter]. I'm a. alcoholic. Winston. you have to listen to me Bob sorry.

Georgina okay I'm gonna share you my. story please. I've been sober for about a week. and it's really hard because every time. I see you guys. I just wanted to have fun and I just. want to drink. and I just want to pass out be in a club.

wow and it's really hard yeah we're not. laughing at you I thought you said she. was being here for a while. she relapses every week oh she does yeah. she does it at the club every single. week she leaves from here to go to the. club is there a club tonight yeah yeah. yeah are you gonna go I don't want you. can't go. yeah and she does this boom boom boom. all night long go ahead.

um hey y'all I'm Winston you're. when you shared the difference. will you share it's different I'm going. to change characters okay good to meet. you I'm Winston I've been here before. you welcomed me no I'm just saying hello. I'm Winston okay hi Winston I am a myth. addict who has a slight issue with. ketamine. a little bit of an adderall addiction. yeah lewds uppers downers squeezers.

poppers yeah. and uh I'm into also suppositories. putting stuff in my tush. particularly I would put tide tabs in my. touch you know Tide Pods people you kids. were chewing them I put them straight in. my butt. um. so I was addicted to that for a long. time I've been sober for a long time. 12 years. and I'm happy to be and I don't think.

relapse is cool I don't think you should. do it even if you're Chinese I don't. think it's appropriate I know given the. circumstances of what y'all brought to. this country is not okay. but I still don't think you should. relapse based on your emotional thrust. of feeling guilty about Rona and I know. y'all feel guilty because you did it. but you really shouldn't. and uh I'm Winston I ain't gonna relapse. that's my time thank you thank you. incident thank you Georgina can I get a. ride home.

let me drive you home all right I'll. drive. I'm sorry but I want you to call I know. Georgina but let me just I. know I know but Georgina right. you know what I mean it's because him. and I are hanging out yeah yeah but I'm. using if I just disappear off the face. of the planet no no we're going to. disappear no you can hear me yeah. louder.

[Laughter]. all right so we're in the car. yeah. you're going the opposite direction over. my house I lived right down the street. on Ventura you like the seat vibrators. you see it's weird that this is this. European this car makes your balls feel. good right yeah yeah and there's also. something sticking out of my butthole. watch this. whoa whoa that's all the way in.

you popped a whole of my new jeans here. yeah watch this Snap. I've never come through my anus before. where are we going where are we going. Winston we're at the club where. Georgina's inside come on man. fun night fun night wow that's a crazy. long story short you are not I'm not. gonna relax I'm not you are not I'm not.

because this is a comedy show but we do. take addiction seriously on this show I. know I you know what guys but at least. you're being honest and real if the fan. the fans get to hear the real truth well. it's you know I like to be honest in. real and be forthcoming yeah right and. um I think by sharing that right I think. if I were going to do it you wouldn't. tell the fans I wouldn't tell anybody. but I've been I've been outspoken about. it like I'll go to a club Comedy Club. yeah and I'll run into somebody that I. know that's sober and I go I don't know.

what you know I mean I'll talk to them. on the side right so I don't I'm you. know if I were to do it I would keep it. inside myself right and make a plan. that's right don't wake after you say. that why because that's like going I'm. not gonna I'm not gonna yeah. do you think do you think Tito Bobby's. going to use again. I don't think so yeah what would you. well how would you feel if he did break. his you know what actually make a. promise to her that you won't. that's you she's broken I can't even get. into it but she's broken so many [ __ ].

promises as a girl no I can't do it this. first of all number one okay she's not. on my side yeah no you're on my. girlfriend's side because you guys are. blood related that's true right so you. keep secrets from me you need blood in. the house why don't you make Stevie move. in everyone will die in the house I mean. he'd like Burn It To The Ground he would. snap and he would if something would. happen if something would drastic would. happen and I don't think you would want. to live with them but my point is is. this okay I feel it that you get your.

you side with her yeah right because you. guys are blood related and I'm nothing. to you. I just happened to be the guy that's not. true you mean a lot to her well I would. like to hear it because I'm vulnerable. right now and I'm I'm in a bad spot so. I'd like to hear these leave it up to. Bobby sabotage my birthday episode about. him. make Bobby feel good now yeah yeah. I look at you like a father figure sweet. but I'm not scared of you.

but I care about you I don't want you to. relapse because. It's Gonna Hurt everyone. did did Jules mean what she just said. magic eight ball. come on this just shake again or ask. again later is meaningless. did Jules mean what she said. come on.

oh. it says yeah I can see it it says yes. okay I believe you it says yes I believe. you. did you see this kid so do you know who. this guy is oh Jamie Costa. oh the guy that does the impression of. Robert Williams yeah but did you see the. the the trailer the trailer unbelievable. unfucking believable it was probably the. greatest Robin Williams impersonation I. think I've ever seen and look he's the. second picture there uh he does kind of. have Robin's eyes yeah. yeah but this dude right here is.

legitimately embodies is he. impressionist. uh I don't know but I know I saw online. him doing why is this guy not on SNL man. because he's so good because now he's. the star of a [ __ ] Robin Williams. documentary really. or I mean a movie a Robin Williams movie. he's the star of that movie and I don't. think. isn't that a movie about Robin no I. think that he just did the production of. that but he this guy did that that's not. a movie I don't think that's a movie no.

am I losing my mind look up Jamie I. thought that was a movie trailer no that. wasn't a piece of a film I think he he. wrote a scene from you know I mean. something that happened in the past. another guy someone else people are. saying they should make a biopic I've. read this I thought this was that they. should make a buy pick this guy should. be the guy you know what I mean you know. who Robin Williams is. yeah he's Genie from Aladdin correct. that is that is the best role he ever. did you're right. and Jumanji correct even more.

specifically. yeah do you ever see him in one hour. photo. woof you want to talk about a [ __ ]. creepy roll really good he also did a um. that picture of him in one hour photo. look at the image of him now tell me. Jules how do you feel about that guy. woof yeah. scary looks like any member of my family. yeah 100 he also did um. Christopher Nolan a movie. with Al Pacino hmm. right is it am I did I get that wrong.

insomnia insomnia yeah yeah yeah yeah. yeah and um he was pretty good in that. too he's finally I'm gonna. what a [ __ ] have you ever see Goodwill. Hunting. yeah is he in that. um yeah he's the therapist. yeah I guess he's a therapist in a way. it's like have you seen Mark Hamill in. Star Wars he's Luke Skywalker actually. Rudy just saw Star Wars for the first.

time you did. yeah which one New Hope. from beginning to end what do you think. all the people there were white. all the people there were white. that is true. that's a good observation well no I. didn't see any brown people you saw a. black person. no Darth Vader's not black that's his. mask he's white underneath no the voices.

he's white the Voice who does the voice. well that's true yeah but that's not a. black guy. in there. that's true damn because of genetics. yeah why would he you know I mean why. would he spawn. hit my head right yes well they should. have had the voice there yeah because. the voice the whoever voiced Darth Vader. black guys have the coolest voices. that's why they did that yeah they it. was an actual black actor yeah because. they have the deepest deep yeah like Doc.

like Doc yeah right but when they lifted. up into the mask obviously it's got to. be a white guy it's got to be a white. that's the one thing that stood out eh. was everybody was white but you didn't. see the second one there's one black guy. in the second one one there's one black. guy but he runs a city that's a good. thing he runs Cloud City that's like. like it's not like he's like a janitor. if he was a janitor at Cloud cities yeah. and they just ran by this guy right hey. Orlando right watch it right he does run. assist right so he's the guy at the city. but what.

but he's untrustworthy. that's what he's doing over there Cloud. City not a city yeah yeah it sounds like. a drink sounds like a criminal's Haven. maybe yeah but you know what I'm gonna. I'm gonna look at the positive right and. he he's in charge of mining oh yes yeah. yeah and yes that kind of thing. mining for yeah but you saw the first. one and didn't like it. I I liked it but.

just wasn't the thing yeah and I thought. Luke was gonna be hot but he's not hot. uh well yeah yeah yeah I mean if that's. your basis on right yeah is that how you. watch things now yeah that you what they. have to be hot yeah so if they're ugly. you're not watching it huh. yeah wow I can I be can I be very honest. yeah I respect the [ __ ] out of that me. undies I'll tell you something pal you. know I like to be uh I like to wear. high-class stuff on my flesh on your.

flesh has to be high it has to be high. class because I'm a high-class guy yeah. you are and my underwear is strictly. only meandi it's fact fact because of. the the the uh the um the type of um. material that they use exactly what I'm. about to say and the design I get so. emotional you do you get a little. emotional I get choked up right and also. I love the designs I have ones that have. like um fruit on it and pandas I have a. little pizza too raccoons raccoon the. raccoon I love the raccoon you know what. just dropped though what glow in the.

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you let me help you out no matter what. you're into box of awesome as you. covered from Autumn craft beers to Cozy. threads and camping gear Essentials. outdoor gear box of awesome has. collections for every part of your life. and I'll tell you how you do it man to. get started take the quiz at box of. awesome.com your answers will help them. pick the right box of awesome for you. and it's the holidays are coming up yeah. they're here and this is the best thing. for gifts it's a great gift it's so easy. so I got the Churchill box is what I've. just gotten for the fall and let me tell. you this is incredible if you're. somebody who likes cigars they got the. custom cigar pack they also have.

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20 off your first month box monthly box. you sign up to box of awesome.com. and enter the code bad friends at. checkout that's box of awesome.com code. bad friends for 20 off your first box. because in Korea right and not in Korea. anymore. we came here for the freest country in. the world dude nobody gonna tell you. what you can it's what I'm saying is. that her she has a Filipino mindset. right and in the Philippines right they. look at more of looks than Talent right.

like for instance we could have America. could have a Philip Seymour Hoffman. because he walks in he's not like you. know I mean Tom Hardy looking character. actor right yeah rest in peace but he's. so legitly skillful yeah he's understood. undeniable that they don't you know I. mean Talent. super you're selling me you're telling. me Philip Seymour Hoffman would never. get famous in the Philippines I don't. think so I think they they would put him. in some weird variety show where they're. putting you know I mean black sludge on.

them I mean they're like. beating him with sticks beating with. sticks and he's doing a funny dance and. then they [ __ ] do it hey yeah yeah. then they Zoom that it becomes you know. what I mean but that's it that's all he. is yeah so they're they're they're looks. first talent second you and I would. never do well over there yeah like it. like if you no you would what you guys. could be in a squid game yeah but I'm. not gonna be the probably the lead I'm. probably gonna be like I'll probably die. at the first and I die right after you. it seems like I'm not gonna die right.

you know like the guys are running down. and you have a shootout and yeah yeah. you're gone I'm like I'll make it up to. you and the moment I turn around right. in my face. I've thought about that right that first. game right we're Stop In Motion go yeah. right you're the I swear to God number. one you be the guy behind me so it. wouldn't sense me I know this and you. would dunk down and I'd be like dude. what the [ __ ] are you doing don't worry. about it dude don't worry if my knee.

hurts that's why behind you my back and. my sciatica and then once they say go. we'll go when we stop you'll push me. and I'll get shot would you do that yeah. why just because. it's not a game because I'm gonna die. soon too that's true it's like we might. as well have some fun die fun yeah cause. at least I laugh you'll go what the [ __ ]. yeah it's gonna be funny before they're. bound to kill me too yeah she would get. clipped fast too no she would make it. really yeah. look at her face she doesn't even.

believe it you don't think you would. make it. um. I don't think so maybe in the middle. somehow Andres would make it through. squid game just because he's just a. little she's a little sneaky little rat. you know he's such a little let me just. see let me see I'm going to do a motion. and you tell me to stop. okay I did it right okay I'm gonna do a. motion and see if I'm gonna be good at. it right go so. what's up. let me give you another shot give me. another shot and go.

[Laughter]. all right right and go. stop. oh you Me Maybe maybe we did have a. little shake it was a little a little. it's not let the juice come out all.

right let me try one more time yeah yeah. Joe yeah yeah. [Laughter]. pretty good pretty good yeah yeah but I. do let me try one let me try one ready. and go. stop. oh that's good okay. good good good good Jules your turn. you have to do one you have to do one.

okay okay you ready yeah yeah. go. all right yeah so no. no you can't stop you can't stop she. stopped when I said stop that was really. good wow that actually that's really. good damn that was really good and then. there's another what's the game after. that was at the tug of war. yeah yeah that was right yeah yeah. I wonder okay let's suppose this team. all right me you right me you and Jules.

yeah versus those guys George Andreas. and easy Pete easy one them yeah. because. of people 100 he [ __ ] it all up yep. right yep what about this then okay. me you and George Pete Jules and Andreas. that's in that's actually more. interesting yeah. no yeah that's that's a tight we had.

nothing against you. because I'm a girl no. that's crazy no it's just because just. nothing against you nothing against you. yeah yeah. um I I actually um oh but did I tell you. I saw a bond not I know that we talked. about it last week but I saw no I saw it. didn't like it I [ __ ] was in love. with it I loved it it was a lot it was. too little a little long a little long a. little longer right right I got up to. pee I've never had to do that yeah yeah.

it was pretty long but I gotta tell you. something gorgeous okay. who was. in your opinion and we'll move on fast. because we've already talked about Bond. yeah yeah who was in the movie your. favorite cameo. in the movie Cameo well or had a short. stint in the film because there were a. lot of people that came and went in that. movie yeah. that's where the Cameo is yeah I know. what a well yeah like you never heard of. it before so who had the best Cameo. um. I forgot his name fancy Christopher Wall.

Christopher Waltz with it's not even a. question he was amazing it's not even a. question yeah yeah and by the way this. isn't me talking shiz yeah I like. bottom tooth what's his name Remy Malik. yeah I like him. I like bottom tooth yeah he looks like. one of those fishes that's on the Deep. angler yeah that he'd be translucent I. mean he look he's yeah okay how do you. think what is how do you feel about this. guy how does he look see they make him. that's what he really looks like yeah.

what you like him he's hot oh my God. look at that that is yeah yeah I mean. this guy this girl that looks like a car. GMC is working on yeah okay so compared. to that to Luke Skywalker why am I. making fun of you just look what no what. the [ __ ] babe he's so pale. so is he no he's okay Luke he's pale no. no he's more pale let me tell you. something yeah this guy is a great actor. one of the best right his lines his.

edges of his face scare the [ __ ] out of. him right I feel like he'll [ __ ] cut. you with his with his chin right but. I just I'm being honest I'm not being a. dick but he I can feel him acting. sometimes in the movie yeah Kristoff. Waltz it was like watching a guy put. butter on toast it was just like a. smooth and he was so patient with the. way he was doing his lines it's. interesting that you say that because I. when he first came out and his it was.

not the energy but he was like just so. in it right and like not trying oh dude. right and he slowly builds it right. you're right I mean his performance it. was good it was very good it was good. that's not right I'm not down in the. guy's performance in fact if I. had a movie a minute I probably put it. yeah yeah no no audition no audition. yeah no audition I mean he was great in. the [ __ ] Queen he was very good. Freddy Mercury that was a great very.

good great actor but there were times. when you know when he was holding the. girl you know what I mean he's trying to. be menacing yeah yeah I did not like I. didn't like but but I thought that. opening scene I'm not giving her any. plot lines none the girl in that house. correct in the in the snow right was. that unfucking real just the way they. shot it so cool the pacing so cool. that's fukinagua Mexican.

yeah wait Pokemon was Mexican yep Kerry. fukunagua who is the one who shot that I. didn't know that and by the way yeah. pound for pound one of the coolest shot. Bond movies I've seen and it's just it's. done it's really well it's done props. hard props um one of the previews that I. saw during it by the way. um that I thought was gonna piss me off. oh no wait okay so we're gonna talk. about the previews before Bond yeah all. right I'm gonna tell you what I liked. and what you tell me what you like okay.

I'm gonna guess I'm gonna guess what you. were gonna say which one which one you. thought it was gonna piss me off but I. actually am excited to see it. Ghostbusters 100 go 100 yeah and. initially I thought this is gonna. [ __ ] piss me off they're gonna do. Ghostbusters again I already [ __ ] the. all-girl won from SNL God bless those. girls but [ __ ] off that was the worst. [ __ ] I've ever seen in my [ __ ] life. my friend Katie dip hold wrote it okay. it's good it was a bad movie stop it. Katie's good she probably I'm sure she's. incredible writer but that movie wasn't. Ghostbusters.

this version I'll tell you I'll tell you. why because it's kids no no it looks. like the the youth exploring the history. of Ghostbusters was cool it's it. reminded me of those 1980 there's like a. little magic in it right of like it's. uplifting yes right it's kind of the. town it's just the music the way it's. shot you have this like kind of magical. sensation right and then once you. realize what it is it has the music. right yep the casting yeah I mean the. color's all right like the creatures.

that are like when Paul Rudd is in the. [ __ ] grocery store and the little. marshmallow internet. when that hat when I saw that it was. just like Goosebumps all over my body. okay this movie by the way yeah. answering the call I'll go back right. yeah no disrespect no disrespect it just. wasn't Ghostbusters is all my point. that's all I'm saying it just didn't. have the the judge yeah and this new one. yeah it does yeah and Aykroyd is in it I. know amazing okay so that one I was.

happy about let me guess what you. weren't happy with go ahead go ahead. Matrix. why. why yeah why I'm saying why are we doing. that. what do you mean why why would I ever. want to see why the [ __ ] are we doing it. like you're correct you're right oh I. thought you were like yeah why haven't I. had anything to do with it no I'm saying. you're right I'm agreeing with you oh. yeah why Matrix why why why yeah I get. it why why yeah why I wanted to say that.

out loud when I saw it yeah why now. now let me get so first they're gonna. [ __ ] it up first of all right if you're. gonna put Keanu Reeves in it he has to. be Neo no [ __ ] he's the guy right Neil. Neil Carrie Anne Moss yeah man. yeah right. but then you don't put [ __ ] Lord's. Fishburn in it. why Madonna too old someone younger yeah. they wanted someone younger no was it a.

situation where he that he got offered. the part and then. um no he went no there's no way they. didn't offer him in the park I think. they politely have to tell him that. they're making we're going a different. direction you're Morpheus they don't owe. him [ __ ] I know that's crazy there's no. way Studios don't give a [ __ ] they're. about the money. look I'm gonna watch it anyway of course. I'm gonna watch it but I'll wait in line. I'm gonna [ __ ] the first guy yeah all. right so uh and by the way yeah after I. see it I'm gonna love it I'm gonna love. every second of it yeah and even if it's.

bad I'm gonna say I love it yeah I'm. gonna lie and then when I see Keanu. right. I'm so happy that you did it yeah yeah. great job you wanna suck his dick you. can't just say it was a great movie you. could just go great movie you know I. never said that something oh it sounded. like you said that I never said that all. right what other trailer did I did I not. like okay oh so um well I'll tell you. what I liked what did you was there. another trailer you liked no oh. no I don't think so really I don't think. it was anything else that I did there. was a movie with Jessica Chastain and. like three other women that are Fighters. that are uh oh oh and then kumails movie.

uh that that one that one as well the. Marvel uh. oh yeah um what is that one called it's. called let me don't say it okay it's. eternals Eternal the eternals yeah. I mean. here's here's what I'm happy for him. because I root for Kumail because I. think he's a good dude yeah he's a good. guy like so I'm happy for him but. um. I understand that um I don't know what.

it is I didn't get it at all the trailer. I was like what the [ __ ] is this what. and they're running on a. tough yeah they're running out of stuff. look at him there yeah it is funny he. got in such good shape only to put on a. full body suit yeah that's great this. that does look like one AB is making its. way down yeah like you know when you get. you know when your balls one of them. goes up into your body a little bit Yeah. that's what happens when it gets one of. my nuts goes up. now the veins did they put that in there. no man that's real no that's him those.

are real they've talked about it on. numerous that's incredible. that's incredible Dune Dune Dune did. look great Dune looks great Dune looks. great that's fine yeah okay but I but. I've seen that before I got in the. theater I hadn't seen the Ghostbusters. trailer oh my God that was so magical so. incredible but I I'd seen dude did you. see the Paul Thomas Anderson one too. I've seen the trailer about a thousand. [ __ ] times now that looks good yes. okay okay I I think PTA is great I also. think you know that's you know Rudy want.

to see it why. no I want to see it I'm starting to read. the book uh what book Dune. [Laughter]. my brother and I are a big fan of the. original I know it got Pam the original. Dune I love the original Doom movie yeah. it's good it's fun you don't like it. it's a little it's a little it's long. it's a little what it's horrible it's a. little shitty okay but it's fun shitty. but it's odd that's what I like about it.

it's because it because it's David Lynch. right there are some weird scenes in it. like when with um sting and that other. yep that fat guy that floats that sting. thing that's not I know but that I know. but those two together as a kid when. you're watching it it's cool it's not. just cool it's scary. it's weird it's cool it's cool because. it's [ __ ] weird as [ __ ] yeah like. these two yeah yeah when this dude comes. out yeah this is the first time I saw a. redhead in my life I'm like oh God.

that's what they look like we protested. this because he's not a nap yeah look at. him right and what's the fact what's the. fat guy the fat guy show him sting in. that other guy that guy that's me is. that you yeah that is you those are wait. those are both stages of your life this. is literally my whole family that's my. family yeah that's you and probably 22. that's you at 16. 60. yeah yeah put a. little bit closer baby I'm that's me in. about six years yeah I keep up this. pandemic 20 that I keep building on. that's me and that's me talking to you. Bobby.

is that me that's you right yeah you. become an old white guy. yeah that's amazing yeah but anyway I. fart so [ __ ] bad yeah I'm gonna watch. that in the theater yeah dune's gonna be. great do you want to watch it 100 let's. go but I thought we're gonna go to scary. nights we'll do that too why don't we go. to why don't we go to Halloween haunted. scare nights or whatever the [ __ ] it's. called and then go to the theater there. and watch Dune they have a theater there. yeah yeah let's go there do they have a. theater there at Universal yeah oh it's.

the honest. say it again no I'm gonna give me. another shot try it again okay can I. yeah all right could you say action. though here we go yeah they have a. theater there yeah they have a Hollywood. say it again yeah we can just go after. we do Halloween we have a holiday. haunted huh they have hanada what is it. called though Halloween lights. Halloween Horror Nights hollowed out. Horror Nights hollowed out Halloween. Horror Nights let's say it again. yeah they have at Halloween Horror.

Nights Halloween Horror Nights Yes. sounds like serious you're saying horn. nights yeah I have problems with my ages. and R's. really yeah. say uh. say Harissa all right so. harisa. say no it's got to be like a sentence. with a bunch of H's in it a bunch of H's. yeah yeah uh do one of those uh little. rhyme things there's no Wellness. seashells seashells by the seashore do. that with H's what are those things even. called.

algorithms what is it called fans tongue. twister tongue twister oh yeah tongue. Twitches with h yeah. let's see if we can um oh let's see any. of these all right go ahead let's see if. you can do anything okay but do it fast. oh there can we do it zoom in more. because my eyes are blurry Jesus more. and more huge it's like I can't I gotta. get glasses. all right so let me go first I'll do the. whole number one ready yeah. Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled. pickled peppers A pickled pickled. peppers. if you hey Peter Piper picked a pig peck.

of pickled pecker purse where's the peck. of pickled peppers. that's a really good thanks. wait go up let me try yeah yeah go fast. though. Peter Piper pictures. it's hard right yeah go jewels. fast. flippers. a pack of pickled peppers Peter Piper.

picked if Peter Piper picked a peck of. pickled peppers where's the big pick of. pepper Piper dick. [Laughter].

ladies and gentlemen thanks man the. Korean Eminem green and Eminem yeah. how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if. a woodchuck could chuck wood he would. chuck as he would as much as he could as. much wood as a woodchuck could if a. woodchuck would you know you know why. you'd go at that because it's reading a. sentence not only that. what you did that in the woods of. Detroit or wherever you're from Chicago.

and you know this yeah same oh no yeah. in the midwest yes you're you and your. pals your Jeffrey Dahmer looking friends. yeah right we're out right let's play a. word game guys yeah in the woods yeah. and then you guys would do this one all. the time it's like I wouldn't even be. able to do that let me try foreign. it's. [ __ ] huge how much would a woodpecker. would chuck would a woodchuck there's no.

pet shark wood no woodpecker woodchuck. how much would a woodchuck chuck if a. woodchuck could chuck wood. Chuck he would as much as you could. because it was a wood as a woodchuck if. I would chuck could chuck wood. by the way yeah that should be the way. if you're trying to find out if an Asian. person can get into this country. hi are you ready to take your.

citizenship test I am all right well let. me tell you something uh Yoshi this is. not gonna be easy but if you fail in. saying this Toshi if you fail now where. are you going. I'll leave it [ __ ] okay Toshi sorry. about that sir Hashimoto Well we'd love. to have you as a United States citizen. ready yeah all you have to do is read. this phrase and that's all you have to. do when you're in the country that's it. that's it that's it but you can't screw. it up all right Toshi so go right ahead. number three how much water. am I out in your house sorry coach yeah.

you're gone oh you know what you know. what we like you yeah let's give you one. more okay how fast can I do it slow it. has to be very fast. come on Tosh how much would a. woodchucker chuck if a woodchucker. sorry toast that's gonna be the end of. it what about my wife oh man would you. like to try yeah yeah I'll try oh. where's your accent. what you come to America all of a sudden. you have an American accent he's a. little lazy did you lose it yes I'll try.

oh that what she's from Wisconsin oh. nice yeah. how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if. a woodchuck could chuck wood he would. chuck he would he would as much as he. could you can't repeat it you're out. okay you guys are both these are crazy. these are crazy she sells she yourself. you know like when you know when like a. racist person yells go back to your. country they should have this on a sheet. of paper and be like read this or go. back to your [ __ ] country yang you.

know what I do like does this work for. you red leather yellow leather red red. leather yellow leather yeah like so a. warm-up exercises when you do warm-up. that one works for me no like when I'm. acting right and I and I have a long. thing to say yeah and I get things. jumbled up in my head yeah when I say. red leather yellow leather right that. works it does work for me really here's. another thing that works what watermelon. watermelon yeah so it's like um. what like do you physically eat. watermelon no oh what the [ __ ] no when.

you're lip syncing when you say water. well it usually lines up. oh like if I'm talking let's say I'm. saying watermelon watermelon watermelon. and you talk you know you're my voice. it'll probably line up all right let's. try all right I'm ready. hey this is Bobby Lee and I gotta tell. you something I am a blatant homosexual. I've talked about it on this show so it. doesn't no it doesn't I'm wrong about it. yeah you're way off 100 because it looks. like you're just saying watermelon.

that's true it doesn't even remotely. look like you're saying anything yeah no. I don't know I know why I know that why. because years ago like um when I used to. I was on a I did a pilot called um I did. one with Steve renazizi and Steve Howe I. forgot it was called and Steve Howe is. that Steve Howie oh yeah it's Zoe Lister. Jones and so I had a lot of scenes where. I was like. in the background and and they would. like you're in the background Bobby just. you're talking.

so I just didn't know what to say. someone extra from Chicago we shot in. Chicago he was like you know a like a. pro extra a background Guy saying yeah. he goes kid you know what the trick is I. go what just say watermelon you know I. mean you know I mean over and over again. so if you see the pilot I guess you'll. see me go. I always thought that that would work. but probably doesn't no because you're. faking a conversation you could just go. anything and then it looks like you. going. yeah yeah.

so. did you make any of those Star Wars did. you make anything yet not yet okay. Jules all right. do you remember Obi-Wan Kenobi yeah he's. the one that Princess Leia made a record. with R2D2 that's true. and in the bar. he walks into that bar right and he put. when he pulls out his lightsaber and. turns it on saber lightsaber saber with.

a B. saver not his lightsaber no it's not. saving light it's lightsaber does life. it does save lives though. so Lifesaver I guess it's called a. lightsaber I wish that was lightsaber. because it saves lives. I guess you're you're right actually. thank you okay so when he pulls out his. lightsaber Lifesaver yeah saver what. does he do with it. he swishes it around. [Laughter]. did not see it did not see it 100 yet we. saw clips on YouTube no I was watching.

it but. you weren't watching it I was the one. yeah okay I think you'll get another. shot another question yeah give everyone. another one yeah give her another one. okay. so um. when they capture. Princess Leia. what's what first of all what's the. planet called or the the. no just listen okay it's the most. notorious thing right they're like.

clothing brands and bands named after so. it's like where Darth Vader is right. it's. it's a spaceship that looks like a. planet right what's that called. did it say that. that yeah it does it does a million. times is it. Imperial yeah Forest yeah Imperial. Imperial Forest no it's called the Death. Star no it's called the Imperial death.

star is the weapon no no he didn't see. it he didn't see it so anyway when. Princess Leia is on the Death Star right. yeah and she in Darth Vader. you could go I want to see her so. there's a scene where they're on a deck. yeah yeah right what does Darth Vader do. she well he wants to show her something. what is she what does he show her. he shows her. planets that are exploding.

that's true that is true that's true. that's what he's one planet. that are her home planet a planet. exploding yeah for home planet that's. what I said. okay you said Planet it's simpler all. right. so when Han Solo right. Princess Leia so Han Solo Princess Leia.

Lou can you say Leia Princess Leia it's. Lifesaver got it. okay I got it all right thank you yes. Princess. Leia my last name's Lee yes I know it's. the only way I can memorize I get it. yeah it's just Leah yeah Princess Leia. all right they is they Escape right and. now Stormtroopers are fighting there's a. right where do they fall into. they fall into. a black hole. [Laughter].

but then they were saved yeah you didn't. see it you definitely didn't see it it's. one of the most notorious scenes they. fall they fall into like a garbage you. know I mean disposal place right where. yes where they get ground up yeah and. then what happens in that garbage. disposal place. C3PO and he's not even in it oh yeah. he's not even in there. someone saves them how.

Obi-Wan okay you did not [ __ ] see it. you have to watch it again you never. [ __ ] saw it we're gonna do another. test next week it's so boring. [ __ ] boring she it's not her. generation would hate Star Wars. but they have no connection to it I know. but I want to say this okay and I really. mean this okay right sometimes I play. stupid on the show we all do that's. that's fun of the show that's the photo. show like I don't know what I'm talking. about right but this is a real thing.

okay it's just listen to me I think this. is very important right when you're. watching something you also have to put. yourself in that generation or that time. it came out right right so it's like. when I listen to like let's say a band. like the Stooges right obviously they. didn't have the kind of recording. equipment and types of things that we. have now right they have facts right but. I put myself in that era and also you. have to think to yourself where was. music at at that point right so what you.

realize what they were doing was. Innovative and different yep right you. have to kind of put yourself there it's. like when you're watching a history. reading a history book right and you're. reading it it's like you can't go well. why didn't you know I mean they nuke. like in the 1700s why they why didn't. they nuke it because they didn't have. nuclear [ __ ] weapons back then right. you have to look at what they had back. then right so when you look at a [ __ ]. movie like Star Wars you realize that it. was the first of its kind it was right. all those spaceships and stuff it wasn't.

[ __ ] CGI. models Real Models right they painted. that [ __ ] right and they zoomed in and. they did all that [ __ ] that was like so. like innovative and. um. do you understand what I'm saying also. Star Wars were they were put in like in. the valley in some weird Warehouse yeah. where there was no air conditioning yeah. and they were just sweating it out. building this [ __ ] kind of like yeah.

yeah exactly and the Studio's like this. is not gonna work right when when. [ __ ] Steven Spielberg showed it to. his friends the first original version. he showed it to George Lucas right uh he. Brian De Palma. um Scorsese all these legendary Right he. brought them all over he's like look at. my George Lucas look at my movie they. after the movie was done they looked him. and goes it's terrible don't even. release it right so then what George. Lucas did was he found a [ __ ]. different editor right and he made the.

action be the editing technique in terms. of that comes first so everything. intermittent is spliced based on the. action right it changed the the movie. yeah right. that's what you have to do when you. watch a movie like that but to you. there's no you're like oh that doesn't. look real or you know I mean there. should be more explosions. Luke Skywalkers I don't like his 70s. haircuts because he was in the 1970s. lady yeah lady.

okay I'll watch it again hey Rudy what. did we miss from your review. from my review. from my review I'm not just Jesus. I said. the acting. Lucas looks acting as bad. [Laughter]. the synonym. matography looks old okay but I like the.

theme music the music you liked yeah. okay. in conclusion it was kind of boring. what do you give it how many how many. stars out of five. two two star all right you know what. [ __ ] you you know Star Wars a two-star. movie [ __ ] [ __ ] you you know what look. at me right now I'm Gonna Give You. spoilers all right because you're not. gonna watch the second one which is the. best one wait make her watch it no you. should watch it I'll watch it no you.

can't watch it all right you're not. gonna watch it and I'm gonna tell you. something all right I'm getting angry. okay I'm gonna give you some spoilers. and everyone's listening so everyone. knows the movie all right yeah okay you. know who Luke Skywalker right and. Princess Leia you know who they are in. relation to each other. siblings they're siblings who's their. dad Darth Vader you already know this. how the [ __ ] do you already know this I. don't know. [Music]. I was just looking at she looked online. I'm sure it's all over the internet.

I'm impressed yeah I'm impressed by how. much she hates it it's actually yeah. I've never heard anyone hate it but you. know what her generation who knows. I bet you we have to have fans that are. in their young 20s that also hate the. [ __ ] movie I'm sure I'm sure there. are yeah they're out there yeah I'm. worried I'm curious to see if you saw a. movie like taxi driver or something dark. never gonna like she's never gonna like. yeah you're not gonna get it because. there's like like Dog Day Afternoon. she'll hate that [ __ ] oh my God what. a great move because it's based on the.

true story that thing you won't like it. you should try you should try we should. make you try these on on this off week. and see which one you actually like no. you know we should do every week at the. end right a movie Reveal Jewels movie. review yeah yeah and we'll make her. watch Classics you have to watch them so. what am I gonna watch now so let's make. her watch I can watch Dog Day Afternoon. I think something I think it's a. phenomenal movie and it also has themes. that are without ruining it that is. something that's current in this day and. age I think something's a little bit. more dark than that Raiders.

Raiders are lost no no. I mean that's great that's great no he's. meaning like something he wants like. dark what about this Apocalypse. Apocalypse Now fine Apocalypse Now great. or Clockwork Orange clock work orange. clock work orange all right you're. watching Clockwork Orange you're. watching Clockwork Orange okay this week. all right. great she just comes back she's like I. watched that movie Orange County it. wasn't good at all yeah yeah yeah it's. called Clockwork Orange Stanley Cooper. when the movie came out it was banned.

from England correct right or Europe or. something I think it was England England. yeah what a weird movie amazing oh what. a weird good movie I remember it gave me. like day night day mares you know like. what nightmares that day yeah I think. about it during the day and be freaked. out with my eyes wide open thinking. about how creepy it was I remember. watching as a kid going. like literally jerking off to The Milk. Bar oh The Milk Bar is the hottest thing. yeah like yeah right so these games I. don't know I'll give it up all right. those milk Bars were like sexy to me it.

was a Milko Willow set yeah all right so. you're watching A Clockwork Orange okay. you logged in you excited. and I want real notes yeah and I don't. want you to be texting yeah no no uh. your phone should be I don't want you to. be texting or anything or watching your. anime because I know you have two. gadgets sometimes. I know you do that no I do you all the. time I see you watching [ __ ] and doing. [ __ ] on your phone okay do you not do. that.

no yeah you do let me ask you something. do you do that. and what do you do that do you do two. things I want to watch a watch a thing. and be on another Gadget if I'm watching. a um docu-series huh I'll do that. but right now I'm watching a show called. secession. it's the best succession yeah it's the. best I didn't know about it and I I know. so are you starting from the first. season yeah what's so good it's so good. and I'm now at the LA tonight I'm. watching the last episode of the first.

season first season but there was a. couple episodes before that that made me. laugh so [ __ ] hard which one. we've all seen it it's where they go to. the [ __ ] um that bachelor party. uh-huh right and then Tom Tom is so. funny God he's funny right Tom goes that. girl that's a good right and what he. does. oh yeah man I know exactly that he. openly admits that yes right like almost. in a bragging way um yeah right and then.

at the end when they're walking out they. go good job Tom we heard like he went. around like everybody everyone knows. about it right it's so [ __ ] funny. Beyond there's also a scene when um. the daughter is begging to go see her. dad Siobhan right and Maria or the. mother or the stepmother Marcia the. Stepmom or whatever yeah yeah see he's. not well you know give it some time and. she's insisting yeah to go up there. right so she just borrowed us up there. she's like I'm you're not gonna you know. what I mean and there's a scene in a.

very intimate moment where she puts her. hand on her dad and he's you know he had. he says a brand brain aneurysm he's in. and out of conscience he's a stroke. stroke right. and he there's a touching scene where he. goes. I love you you know you know that he's. never said that probably before ever she. starts tearing up right then he grabs. her hand and tries to get her hand to. touch his penis yeah it's the funniest. thing on earth so [ __ ] funny right. that show is so good it's so good and.

I'm excited because of a show like this. because I never I didn't know what it. was I can't believe you never saw it no. it's so popular I know my friend Jean. was like you haven't seen it it's just. you know there's so much [ __ ] out yeah. you miss it right yeah so now watching. it and I have now seconds the second. season that I've never seen and then. also the third season coming up I'm so. [ __ ] excited just wait I'm a great. third season great do you know who kills. it on that show by the way Kieran Culkin. yeah he does do great I love him but. who's who to you makes you chuckle. because it's he's so funny and dumb.

Greg Greg is [ __ ] unreal dude I feel. so bad for him oh he's the best yeah. wait till second season you're gonna. love it I just you know I'm afraid that. he's gonna die he's not gonna die he. doesn't die thank God I don't know what. happened in the third season but he's so. dumb so good I know we in the show yeah. is he not dumb Nicholas Braun his name. is Nick Braun he's a [ __ ] great actor. he's friends with people I know really. well really when the show came out I. reached out to him online and I was like. I want to tell you dude you steal comedy. scenes from that show because it's his.

nervousness and he throws away a dumb. line yeah and because the way he goes so. you know when he throws away something. small yeah he's so [ __ ] funny like. he's so out of touch it's great yeah. he's like the characters he's [ __ ]. phenomenal oh it's a great show what a. great show anyway all right so listen. yeah. I'd like you to sing you just you Bobby. lay to sing me Happy Birthday quietly. smoothly sexily in your own Bobby Lee. way go ahead. may I say something before I go yeah.

okay. you know I could do it comedically. okay okay. I could do it with a smile. but I can also do it. real and in a way how it really makes me. feel about you okay. but now that I just said that it makes. me laugh I know right. so just give me a second go ahead and. just recoup I'm sorry.

why does that happen we can wait all. right no here we go.

oh. come on. foreign.

happy birthday. to you. happy birthday. to you. [Music]. happy birthday. dear Andrew.

foreign. [Music]. to you. thank you Bob. thank you for being a bad friend. thank you Bob. huge. [Music].

laughs. [Music].